Does this mean you aren’t guaranteed a top 3 finish?
Lol never guaranteed a top 3 finish for one I just submitted unmodified lore cars and there’s enough randomness going on in here, I have no idea what chances my cars have anyway!
With the traditionnal ties between the SARA and Russia, it seemed natural to reach for a dealership there…
On the road, there was a lot of debat about the strategy… Watteau was in this, primarily, to get an opportunity to study designs from the competitors, after having been bashed by the press for the bland looks of the SARA 4.
TUrini, on the other hand, was much more interested in the engines and chassis tuning - he very much was still a tuner and driver at heart.
They would have to compromise to find the right car…
They arrived to the dealership, which looked almost abandonned. The iron curtain had fallen, but the information didn’t seem to have arrived there, the place seemingly still stuck in the 70’s soviet era.
Finally, a janitor came to open the door… “The boss told me you’d come, he said to open and make sure you can look quietly at the cars. They’re in the parking lot, just there. Take your time, but remember you cannot test drive them, regulations and shit forbid this. They all have that small sticker with price, power, stuff like that”.
“Thanks a lot. Oh, I forgot, I brought you the grappa my 'pa made when I was young, everytime I came there people really seemed to enjoy it - me, I use it only to clean the windows on the cars - it’s way too agressive on the paint”
Now, let’s get to work
“Rally car, and we’ll do track, not sure it is the best choice”, says Turini.
“Maybe, maybe, but look at the quality of those trimmings… Those wheel arches, the front fender… I’m sure I could learn a lot by studying it”, replies Watteau
“A bit on the ricer side, if you ask me. I wouldn’t call that sleek”
“It’s agressive, and it’s really nicely done. Even though I’d agree it’s a bit showy, this is a rally car, buyers don’t like these cars all sober and refined, they like it that way”.
“The price is okay, but I’m not a fan of AWD cars… And over 100 000 miles on a 230hp I4, I’m concerned about reliability - or the possibility to tune it further. Also, did those Hermes won anything in WRC ?”
“So, it’s a maybe”
“Yeah, I’d be much more interested if it was a FR setup, never liked driving AWD”
“Now, I like these… Well, I shouldn’t say that, they’re our primary competitor for the Berlinette, but those guys at Caliban know how to build a car”
“Design wise, it’s really good, but we don’t work on this kind of cars at SARA, so unless I get to work on a Berlinette I’m not sure I can learn a lot”
“MR setup, low mileage… The only thing I’m not sure I like is that V8. I’m afraid it might be heavy, and I’m obviously more accustomed to nimble cars. But this is a serious possibility”
“Not sure about the looks, why such a high clearance on a sportscar ?”
“Yeah, it doesn’t feel balanced, bound to be front-heavy, and all those vents on the front - I’m afraid they had some overheating issues on their engine, with that mileage, I’m not taking the risk”
“We’ll pass on this one”
“Holy Mother of… A FAAL”
Both sign themselves to try to conjure the antechrist
“Damn those alsacians, they eat our market share on a daily basis”
“Yeah, but that’s because they build some damn fine cars”
“Still, can we be seen driving a FAAL ?”
“I wish I had it ten years ago, though - those design cues are great for the era. Cuneiform, but I like it nonetheless”
“Rear wheel drive, but with an heavy I6 Turbo in front, I guess it would be a blast to drive but not that great on the clock. And I’m not sure we could tune it a lot more”
“Still a good car though. But we’ll pass”
“Another WRC car”
“Yeah, remember this one. Turbo, DOHX, the whole ballgame”
“It looks okay, but a bit generic, doesn’t it ?”
“Still better than the SARA 4”
“It’s close to the Hermes, on the paper, and with a much lower mileage”
“If I have to drive an AWD, I’d rather have the Hermes”
“Okay, that’s a pass then”
“80’s design again. We did some quirky things back then. The design cues are there, but then it’s so… Japanese…”
“Yeah, and it seems long - way too long wheelbase for the track, at least for me. I4 Turbo, of course, at least this is the kind of engine I know how to work with”
“Still, The Hermes seemed better balanced”
“Yeah, it’s a pass”
“let’s call Igor and see if we buy the Hermes or the Caliban, then. One is a typical SARA competitor, the other right there for your Turinis”.
Igor arrives, with a bottle a vodka and three glasses
“Have you decided yet then, friends ?”
“We need… to think a bit more about this over a drink. Santé !”
“The V8 from the Caliban is too much. It’s gonna be heavy, it’s gonna be a gaz guzzler”
“But power… Torque… and a MR setup. And low mileage”
“The Hermes might be shot - 105 000 miles is a lot, and it’s been tracked”
“We get more budget for the tuning on the Hermes. And front engine means easier access for repairs”
“Excellent vodka, by the way, Igor, thanks”
“I’m quite confident the Caliban will be the faster on the track, but the Hermes might end up being funnier to drive and tune”
“Coin flip it is, then ?”
And the final choice is… The Caliban
Seabeast Motorsports doesn’t have its own dealership to buy from. Why? Because you will decide what car Eric Jonrosh is gonna be stuck driving in the ASC! We have our fair share of memey cars this round, so what will it be?
- Sofa S2200 - R
- ACA Prowler
- Mystery Machine
- Zenshi Tsumori
- Emotion GSi
- Albatross 570 Sport
Ignore my vote, I goofed
LAST CHANCE TO VOTE, poll closes in a few hours, (8:00 PM EST)
Do you want a Sofa
Because that’s how you get a Sofa
I get this reference.
Now I could vote for the Sofa because “Cheap 2 Win”, but I feel that’s not Japanese videogame difficulty. If it weren’t for those meddling kids, I’d vote for it!
Ok, time for some lore;
Somehwere in America, at Charlie Nash’s respectful suburban house. Charlie is browing his computer for offers, when chief mechanic Manny “Bison” Vega comes in. If I had to put a voice on him, I wouldn’t mention Vladimir Lem from Max Payne for any reason whatsoever…
Manny: Charlie, my dearest of bosses! I have news for you, my friend.
Charlie: (turns around to face Manny) Oh, hi Manny. Good or bad?
Manny: I can bypass the bad ones and only give you the good stuff, if that is what you like.
Charlie: As if I can ignore bad news. Don’t give me sass Manny, tell me like it is.
Manny: You sure, Nashie?
Manny: Ok then, you can kiss my RS goodbye.
Charlie: I’m not kiss… (sudden realization hits Charlie, who puts his hands to his head) Oh no, oh no no no, you have to be kidding me, Manny. (slams hands on desk) You had one important job!
Manny: And I fullfilled it to the best of the skills your father taught me. Turns out Omologato let some Russians buy a Hermex right under our noses, while some man named Alex purchased another one. I’m still on the process of tracking the rest…
Charlie: Well so much for that, I subscribed to Omologato to find one! It’s called “Homologation” for chrissakes, the Rallex is a rally-bred car!
Manny: You know what they say, don’t buy a book without asking the author first.
Charlie: That’s what you say, Manny. You always had a knack for silly life philosophies…
Manny: Well, either way, I guess this opens the glorious opportunity for you to buy a Sofa!
Charlie: (stares with a piercing gaze that could penetrate a thousand Kevlar layers)
Manny: Er, this was… How do I like to put it… It’s joke, yes?
Charlie: I hope to the comedy gods that never catches on. (scratches head, and slumps back into his chair) Christ… now what are we supposed to do?
Manny: Let’s just see if we can salvage something from Omolgato’s current lineup before you throw the proverbial towel. You said you had your reasons to do this, right?
Charlie: Yes, I do. Especially when he’s around, I can’t afford to miss this chance…
Manny: You mean your father? (looks at desk, littered with cut used car ads of SARA cars) Hold on, why are there so many SARA ads on the table? Omologato has no SARA cars in their lineup, Nashie.
Charlie: And who said I expected them to, Manny? He would not appreciate it if I beat him with one of his own cars, surely. It’d be like stabbing a knight with his own sword. I’m not about to do that.
Manny: Haha, I see now. Actually, I should have seen it coming for a while back. Jean Turini… As a rally fan, this is Cloud 9 for you, is it not?
Charlie: I thought I was already there when Oliver (Ross) announced his entry. While my dad was destroying African landscapes, he was out there winning at Daytona. But when SARA’s announcement came…
This is no stinkin’ marketing stunt, this is Jean testing his craft. SARA can sugarcoat it all they like, but this is about him proving the Turinis still got it.
Manny: Well we can daydream about a fated battle later. We must choose from what non-literal lemons Omologato has, or you can kiss your chances goodbye.
Charlie stares at the computer, scrolling through Vehicle Master Omologato’s current lineup. Manny stands close to where Charlie’s sitting, to have a better look…
M: Alright, first car, the Falcon Vertru. Turbo engine, coupe shape… A good start.
C: The mileage is a bad ending, though. Anything past 100k miles is a no-no in my book. And these new-ish coupes have been mostly riced. Too much boost, or needless aero “enhancements”… Don’t want to bank on baseball caps to win races.
M: Well then, it’s out. Next up, the… Anhultz Mimas Turbo? Pronouncing that name just gave me an English degree. It’s as diginified as yours truly!
C: Quite, because your English is kindergarten-worthy.
M: Oh Nashie, childish insults are unbecoming of the wisest of the Nashes.
C: There isn’t much wisdom to get around in this family… Either way, this has even more mileage than the Falcon. Might be nothing for a luxury car, but the price doesn’t give us much leeway to fix things that might break. Too much of a risk.
M: And another one bites the dust. Ah, the glorious Sofa next! Complete with low mileage!
C: Plus low power and low chances of winning! Buy one if you’re so enamored with the damm thing, or buy ten since it’s probably made of dreams and handicapped '80s muscle car engines.
M: Well call me a bee, because you’re a buzzkill, Nashie. Ok, Arai Kyori GT-T.
C: Hmm… This one has something going for it. A rally-bred sedan, just the way I like. All-wheel-drive, a turbo engine, it sounds like a budget Rallex.
M: Won’t that add a layer of bias to it…
C: It’s not bias, numbnuts. Either way, this falls under consideration. What’s next, Manny?
M: Mitsuhita Boarilla GTI. Funky name.
C: Certainly sounds like a GTI. But it is the cheapest car of the lot…
M: mumble grumble Sofa
C: Like I was saying, it’s the cheapest. But with the FF, it’ll put too much strain in the front tyres. Even with its decent mileage, that’s a big issue. Final entry is…
M: …ahem. The Aeros Router Mk1 Refresh GT.
C: Say it slowly or you’ll gargle your tongue, bud. Another interesting car. It has a V8, a proper one this time, and an FR drivetrain. Another kind of rally motoring. But the engine should’ve been the only big thing about it…
M: The wheelbase, right? You think it’s too big. But doesn’t long wheelbase equal more stability…?
C: Precisely. But heavy body equals less useable performance. This may be endurance, but I still need speed. …well, decision time.
The mouse cursor hovers around over the last three cars, until finally coming to a stop at a red sedan.
M: Predictable, but not all a bad idea. In the end, you want something akin to what your idol would drive, huh…?
C: Maybe. But above all else, I want consistency and efficiency. And this will deliver on both fronts. Send an email to Vehicle Master, let them know we want the car. And call the guys, it’s time. I’m heading out.
Charlie leaves, but Manny stays behind, picking up the former’s brick cellphone…
M: Hello? Is this Vehicle Master Omologato? This is Manny Vega. I would like to discuss details over a… blue Sofa S220? No, it’s not for the Automation Cup… No, this isn’t April Fools…
The Throwback Club: Japanese touchdown.
Two weeks after the last preparations for the trip to Japan, the Throwback Club is finally in the land of the rising sun. After getting a translator, and picking a car as well as renting a place in the pits of Tsukuba, the car finally arrives at the pits.
Chen: “Ah, there it is. What did you get, boss?”
Oliver: “A beauty. You wait and…” Oliver removes the cover, revealing a Dragotech Sagitta “…see!”
Chen: “Now that’s what I call a good one. I’ll get to work on it right away.”
Oliver: “By the way, did Flores research who we are going against out there?”
Chen: “Ah yes, we have some serious competition. Ex karting racers, an ex touring car racer as well, professional tuners, a driver called Rusty Kuntz…a few amateurs and enthusiasts but you should keep an eye out on them. A karting champion too…also some big names. Even ex military.”
Oliver: “Holy shit. Big names though…such as?”
Chen: “Jean Turini, official SARA driver. CSM, Dakar veterans. Ex endurance racers. Two who apparently took part in the Great Automation Run. And most importantly…”
Oliver: “Straight to the point, please.”
Chen: “Marvin Callaway and Eric Johnrosh.”
Oliver froze for a second, memories of the 1987 season of ASCAR flooding back in. He remembered his first season at the ovals, racing against Jonrosh and Callaway as he took that bloated Scorpio around the corners.
Oliver: “I’m gonna have a short walk down the pits. Excuse me for a few minutes.”
Oliver put his beloved old cap on, proudly displaying his wife’s signature next to his name. Exiting the pits, he started looking at what the other teams were doing as he walked down them, before he heard his name said towards him. Oliver glanced quickly to see a man walking towards him.
Charlie Nash: “Mr. Ross, yeah?”
(@Nicking_HC It’s on you now )
Well, I shall wait a bit before handing the (hopefully non-rubbish!) continuation to this interesting side story we’ve developed… Gotta let the other teams get a word in edgewise, after all.
You do get bonus points for using a GT2 song. The dealership setup triggered your childhood memories too, didn’t it?
Hello, this is Eric Carlén reporting from Amsterdam. Yes, you read right. Because somebody (our chief editor) decided that participating in the ASC would not be enough. We are going to combine that with an article about importing a car from another country inside the European Union, so they sent me to some backyard dealership in Amsterdam, called “Connors coveted cars” to look for the car we are going to build the ASC racer from.
Looking at the cars, the first one that met my eye was a NINOMIYA EVRA SPORT from 1995. However, that one was excluded almost immediately. 107874 miles on a 4 year old car makes me think that it already has lived a hard life, and it probably won’t be an easier one on the racetrack. I don’t want to risk the car breaking down completely, so nope, no Ninomiya for me!
A MITSUSHITA BOARILLA GTI was the next car to go, also that one from 1995. Somewhat lower mileage but still high for such a new car. Not enough to cause worries, but I know a few people with Boarillas and it doesn’t really feel like a sporty choice, a quite big FF car with 145 hp, I’m afraid this one won’t cut it!
The next vehicle I was looking at was one of the most pristine FAAL MESAIAs I’ve ever seen! Still smelling like new inside, only driven 39780 miles in almost fifteen years. An interesting little hot hatch, absolutely! But 139 hp felt like a bit on the low side, and I really felt that this one should be bought by an enthusiast wanting to preserve it, rather than being cut up into a race car.
A 1992 CASCADA HARIKEN ST was looking interesting. RWD turbo goodness in a fairly new car, good condition, not too awfully expensive. Yes I considered that one for a while.
However, maybe a 1988 DAAG ES40S would have been a better choice? No turbo, but a 188 hp V6, RWD and a very attractive price.
I thought that it would be a hard choice. Until I found the car of my choice. With a 273 hp inline six, the other cars weren’t even close engine wise. N/A but maybe I could squeeze in a turbo in the tight budget, if so, it would probably really come alive. Three year old, over 25 years newer than the 1969 Volvo I drove until recently, over ten years newer than my current Contendiente, by a great margin the newest car I’ve owned this far. Low mileage, sure it was a bit expensive but why be greedy now? And not only RWD. Mid-engined RWD, oh boy!
So, the car I finally drove away with was a 1996 LMC MIRO R6.
To be continued…
Team: The overreving heads
Team leader: Sudo Takeshi
Drivers: Nagata Kazuhiko, and as second driver, Orido Yusuke.
Though I very much approve at being on sale at Big Bill Hell’s Cars and Mr. Bone’s Wild Rides in the South City. Oh, and don’t forget to stop by Wall-Kart. There’s a surprise waiting for you there.
But anyways, Albatross Motors Corporation wishes the racers the best of luck!
Your Albatross is a brilliant car for this challenge
Can the deadline be 3 June, I am in a holiday at the moment.
Team Sungaü Motorsports - Setting up the car
The team finally made it back to Altkirch in one piece. Camille and Mathieu were still in the hospital, recovering from salesmen bruises. Julien and Loïc in the meantime, had done all that had to be done to make the car road legal in France… And now it’s time
for the Dougscore to see what we can do with the car.
Loïc: Alright, alright. I was going for a “keep the engine stock” kind of thing but damn, for a two years old car the turbo kicks in SUUUUPER late! And in a weird way…
Julien: Yeah, I noticed that, and for a good reason… There are 8 more cams than valves, if you catch my drift.
Loïc: Did they really~
Julien: They fucking did, seppi.
Loïc: … On a TURBO engine?!
Julien: Yep. Sounds contradictive, but it can be a real blessing when tuned properly.
Loïc: WHEN TUNED PROPERLY. huffs … Can you do that?
Julien: I’ve seen worse… I don’t think I can up the power but I’m pretty sure fiddling with the cams and the turbo pressure could do the trick…
Loïc: Primaaaa… On my side, I found some BBW Wheels. They’re a little heavier than the stock ones but they definetly can fit wider tyres. And wider tyres I have.
Julien: Oh don’t mind the weight, it turns out you can actually shed a lot in there. I got someone getting the full interior and another one for the sound system. We’re just gonna put in two light race buckets and a CB. Calling it now, three figures kilograms. Not to mention it’s gonna pay for the wheels… And the coilovers.
Loïc: Coilovers? The suspension felt fine, though…
Julien: Oh, we can make it even better. I bet you a bottle of my granddad’s Kirsch.
Loïc: … Y’know what, let’s do this.
the car was ready, with the new coilovers, the new wheels… And oh. It turns out that the team still had some leftover Pearl White.
Julien, Mathieu and Camille all went together to tune the engine: The result was a turbo kicking in a whole 400RPM earlier and producing an almost constant torque from there to high up in the rev range, where the power stayed exactly the same. To cope with the extra torque and extract the best start out of it, the gearbox had been revised to smoothen up the power band even further. And not an ounce of fuel was used more than before the tune. Perfect.
The suspension had been tuned so the car is always on the edge, but still driveable. Loïc wouldn’t even have to put effort in his driving to keep the car on full attack mode all the time.
Selling basically the whole interior made the car shed a little over 100kg. As a result, the car was a whole 5.5 seconds faster on the Airfield test track than before. And every single € they spent found their way back in their pockets. Ain’t life wonderful?
(I want to personally apologize to @machalel for those ugly blinkers, but they were from the one single mod I forgot to download on the Steam workshop and I was balls deep inside the tune when i noticed they were missing)
So, if the game calculates the P/W ratio to 1.51 while my own calculations says slightly under 0.176 (0.175verymanydecimals), is the car allowed then?
Yes thats ok, the game gives the inaccurate number so I’m going off of the .176 “actual” power to weight limit
Apology accepted as long as you accept my pre-emptive apology if some of the trim starts falling off… The general “market niche” for Epoch is a British version of Hyundai/Kia after all…
I tried to stay reasonably true to a mid-90s WRX/EVO competitor, so deliberately made sure it was realistically compromised.
“Everything from here down is worse value for money than a Sofa…”
*Looks at list. WTF!?!?!?!
On paper at least! Totally not trying to make more people buy Sofas or anything. Nope. Not me.