CSR 100 - Malicious Compliance

2008 Popas Blinsky

Зачем заводить фальшивых товарищей, если есть настоящие? Popas Blinsky поставляется со всем, что нужно гордому гопнику. Двигатель? 140 л.с. V6. Максимальная скорость? 200kmh +. Задние двигатели для развлечения с товарищами? О да. Посетите вашего следующего дилера Popas для получения дополнительной информации.

((Why get fake comrades when you can have real ones? The Popas Blinsky comes with everything a proud gopnik needs. Engine? 140hp V6. Top Speed? 200kmh+. Rear engined for having fun with comrades? Oh yes. Visit your next Popas Dealer for more Informations.))

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2008 Bechov YK90

In 1991 we introduced the world to the YI9 series Cкалолаз. In 2008 we have reintroduced the world to the YK9 series, again to live up to the name Cкалолаз. Every model comes equipped with lockable diff and Bechov’s “хит защита” extra-durable tyre and wheel combination, so that you can drive any road across the world.

Engine options starting at 1.9L 3-cylinder for both power and economy, up to double with 3.8L V6 and AWD with YK92.


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The Teaught Aprixas Hatchback, refreshed for the 2008 model year.

Addt'l Image

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saw yangx2’s Chinese entry and Mikonp7’s Russian entry, I had to do this.

2008 Permata Aspire E sedan: Proven quality.


Jika kamu bukan orang yang bodoh atau gila, kamulah beli kereta yang bermutu tinggi. Dijanakan dengan enjin petrol 1.6 liter turbo empat silnder yang berkuasa dan berjimat minyak, segi rekaaan yang bergaya, bahagian kabin yang luas dan selesa, teknologi keselamatan yang canggih, kereta ini pula mengingatkan kamu ini bukan kereta yang biasa.

Dari Malaysia, ke dunia.

If you’re not an idiot or a psychotic you would buy a car with high quality. With an powerful yet efficient 1.6 liter 4-cylinder turbocharged powerplant, stylish design, spacious and comfortable interior, and the highest safety standards, the Aspire E would remind you this is not your ordinary car.

From Malaysia to the world.

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malaysia boleh

(and yes, I was planning to have a collab but since I figured it out so I did it myself anyway)

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I shall reply this as a joke…


A random Indonesian person: Saya bukan orang bodoh atau gila. Kenapa saya mau beli kereta?!

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Kereta in bahasa Indonesia…

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I now feel obliged to make an Indonesian entry

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Korean Motors is refreshing it’s lineup, and is now selling the last units of the (in)famous Sophista. A 4-door saloon with good ride, well equipped (alloy wheels, parking sensor, ABS, power steering, and Climatronic), and all of this, for less that do you expect: $8000

That unit it comes with a reliable 1.9L 4-cylinder engine that delivers a healthy 121hp to the front wheels.

[spoiler] I’m feeling really bad to give that to the poor Peter [/spoiler]

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Acquire one now for $8,888. Leather upholstery sold separately.

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Do those three seats all have to be full-sized, which I’m assuming they are? If so, then 2+2 and 2+3 seating are both outlawed.

Anyway, I’ve been brainstorming a few ideas lately, but I need to make a decision on which one(s) I should develop further.

it does not say that they have to be full seats.

and what is not in the rules is up for interpretation by the respective entrant

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Tri TLS

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Don’t rely on public transport. Take the CMT Hippo SUV-Sedan!

P.S. Please don’t ask why.

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Volvo:

2008 AutomanSchport Aveanto

Is it a car?

It indeed is a car.

Does it schport?

It has a turbo engine and a bodykit, of course it can into schport.

Is it easy to drive?

We tested it using monkeys. They could drive it easily.

Is it eco?

It's an inline 3, of course it's eco!

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Can into images



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Are you interested in 90’s nostalgia? What’s that? You do? Well here’s the perfect car for you! the car I’m showing you today is the 1995 Buck Albatross, the perfect car for you! It packs a V8 under the hood for all your driving needs! For sale now at a local dealer for €3,917 ($4390)

Full disclosure, I am actually a professional mechanic. I don’t know if this is cheating, but I have taken this lemon party (do NOT Google that) of a CSR to vent my opinions on car idiots. I mean in-jinn-eers. No, idiots sounds better.

I shall place any meta statements (what I shall politely call jokes) in italics, that means I have made a sarcastic reference to a real manufacturer. Now on to the advert:

New for 2008 PMC has partnered with Sanand motors of India to import the Parivahan. With the newly re designed Wyvern L3 with the now standard 17S09 tuning set, drivers get a brisk 118HP and 31.7 combined MPG under the VW-AG emissions protocol. Power is delivered more efficiently that ever with the ShiftPower double clutch manu-matic. Available with the smooth shifting 14M01 calibration, or the surprising acceleration of the 14M02 calibration there is a shift tuning for every driver. Ask your dealer for details.

OK, this is sounding too clunky. Seriously I feel like “Uncle Buddy” squeezing out puns. I’ll just meta the rest, it has the rear axle of an Windstar (NHTSA 10V385000), the brake calipers off an Impala (NHTSA 18V576), the cab of Subaru Ascent (NHTSA 18V-508), and the steering of a Santa Fe (NHTSA 18V118000). I could absolutely keep going, but I feel I made my point. New cars are inexcusably horrible. I am resisting the urge to break out my soap box, so in the interest of avoiding a tirade I will end here. Enjoy this shiny new death trap.

The 2008 (Imported for) PMC “Parivahan”


Parivahan, go places.

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Translation:

Mondo EB5 X.
Xpress Yourself.

Make the Youth Swear.
The Mondo EB5 X is the perfect companion for the burgeoning youth. Its practical size, sporty appearance, ample power, extensive features, and ease of maintenance, are guaranteed to impress young men and women alike to the point of swearing.

Expressive Styling.
The Mondo EB5 X is equipped as standard with the SportStyle Body Kit, giving it a more athletic and aggressive look than any other Mondo EB5 trim. The new large lower grille is molded with sharp curving angles, creating an air of performance. Aerodynamic features, such as the rear diffuser, spoiler, and front lip, are present to increase driving performance and support the sporty aesthetic. The rims are accented to create a sense of hierarchy towards the wheels, referring to the performance behind it.

Stunning Performance.
As the Sport Trim in the Mondo EB5 model, the Mondo EB5 X comes with powerful performance equipment. The 2.0 litre, direct injected 4-cylinder engine, turbocharged for maximum power and efficiency, ensures the Mondo EB5 X is a fast one off the line.

Features:

  • Power Steering
  • Air Conditioner
  • Gear Lever
  • Power Window
  • Glove Box
  • Safety Belt
  • Front Wheel Drive
  • Front Airbag
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Reduit Automotive GSR9 - CSR Anniversary Edition


Long story… but basically the car was finished and the CEO locked the shed before going to Norway for “research purposes”… so we didn’t have time to make an advertisement… or to see if the Lada engine we borrowed actually works… looks nice though…


Oui

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BM Bismol

You can tell why it’s named that, but with a staggering 2.1L/100km highway consumption*, who cares?

Ample room to seat 3 in relative comfort, an advanced all aluminium construction to make sure you’re friends with the local body shop, it’s too simple to break but good luck changing the spark plugs! Perfect for a new driver because lets be honest you’ll be getting all the work done at the garage anyway so what do you care?

*At 56mph, 3.1L/100km combined average

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