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Once More (Unto the Breach) [FINAL RESULTS]


#266

Team Trinity

Comfort Suites - Bozeman 2am local time

Matt: zzzzz
John: zzzzz
Alice: zzzzz
Ivy Mike, sitting on the window sill of a window slightly open: Meow… Mreeoowww! Meow… Meow… Mreeeooowww!


Also sleeping at the Comfort Suites
@mart1n2005
@abg7
@Radster
@Caligo


#267

TGGBA: SHITBOX CRUSADERS

The four are asleep: Yuri mumbles in unintelligible Japanese, presumably a dream.

YURI (asleep): “…殺してやる… 殺してやる… 殺してやる…” (EN TRANSLATION: “I’ll kill you… I’ll kill you… I’ll kill you…”)

(Also located in same area for the night:
@Boiled_Steak
@kobacrashi
@yangx2
@Centurion_23
@Xepy
@SkylineFTW97
@Aaron.W
)


#268

Team Beer Blokes & BBQs

Mike: zzzzzzzzz
Sam: zzzzzzzzz
Tom: zzzzzzzzz

Everyone else stopped at the Best Western Plus:
@kobacrashi
@yangx2
@Xepy
@Boiled_Steak
@SkylineFTW97
@Aaron.W
@Keikyun


#269

Team “Buy Skyrim”

Everyone is sleeping.

Meanwhile in the HQ of Bethesda (NOT RELATED TO THE RACE AT ALL)

Person #1: Todd, I just told that 3 people who claimed they are big fans of The Elder Scrolls is having a big race. Should we help them?
Todd Howard: doing nothing, then walked away
Person #2: Erm…Tony, maybe it’s not a good idea lol.


#270

Team Tiger Trouble


Kayden got out of his sleeping roll, trying to be quiet as he left his sleeping siblings in the room. He knew he needed something to eat, he hadn’t been keeping track of his meals all day, and he was paying for it now.

He took one of the key cards with him, then headed for the elevator, following Nova’s guidance to the 24-hour pantry. The door closed, and he felt the jolt as it started the slow descent to the lobby, where the doors opened with a sharp dinging noise that seemed unreasonably loud to Kayden’s ears. He looked to his right wrist, followed the map across the lobby, and then trusting his instincts, following his nose to the food.

He was trying to decide between three different brands of beef jerky when he heard a gasp from behind him. His ears twitched just before he turned, setting the bag of dried meat back on the shelf as he looked at Fuzz from Team Greasy Lightning. His tail twitched lightly, causing his un-belted robe to slip open, revealing more of his white fur and black stripes, and also his sister’s amusing gift of leopard print boxers.

The man spoke, “Oh, uh… Hi! You guys are on this whole road-race thing with us, right? You’re driving that Sinistra?”

Kayden nodded, then replied with, “Yes, we are.” He thought for a moment, trying to place the man’s voice to any he might have heard over the radio earlier, but kept drawing a blank. Giving up on the guesswork, Kayden decided simply to ask, “Which team are you from, again?”

“Oh, yeah. Greasy Lightning.” He replied. Kayden thought for a moment, then remembered why that team name sounded so familiar. He started to laugh, a deep, raspy laugh as he tried to keep it down, knowing that a laugh and his tiger-like roar weren’t too far separate from each other, and he really didn’t want to wake the whole hotel with a noise that could be heard up to a mile away.

“You’re the team that had the so-called ‘chemical attack’ this morning.” Kayden finally replied, with a light grin. It was all he could do to keep it together when Fuzz pinched the bridge of his nose and sighed.

“Yeah… that was us. I ripped a huge fart and my sister made a big deal out of it.” Fuzz replied, and Kayden gave a knowing, sympathetic nod.

“Sisters do have a way of making issues bigger than they should be.” Kayden said. He thought for just a moment, realizing he didn’t know who exactly this person was. “Tell me, what is your name?”

“Fuzz. I mean, Ted. My name is Ted, but everyone calls me Fuzz.” the man replied. Kayden nodded, not really understanding the word, but understanding the concept of a nickname. He mouthed the unfamiliar word a few times, and said it under his breath twice, before giving another nod.

“It’s good to meet you, Fuzz. My name is Kayden.” He replied. “I hope you don’t mind if I grab a few snacks, I didn’t eat enough in the car, and if I don’t start in on something soon, it’s going to get painful.” When Fuzz nodded, Kayden grabbed the three bags of jerky he’d been puzzling over before he’d been politely interrupted, then sliced the tops of the bags open with a practiced flick of his claws. He grabbed several large pieces and shoved them into his mouth, sharp teeth making very quick work of the dried meat, before he let Fuzz pick through the shelves.

Once Fuzz had a bag of chips ripped open, he asked Kayden, “So, when you’re not racing, what do you usually do?”

Kayden smiled, before replying, “With the exception of the past few weeks, where I’ve been on your world seeking a replacement fuel source for my ship, I’m normally a pilot for our military, the Tigrilan Warriors, but I also have some specialized training. What do you normally do when you aren’t racing?”

Fuzz smiled, then answered with, “I’m a police officer. Haven’t seen any real action, but it makes me feel good at the end of the day.”

Kayden seemed puzzled over what Fuzz said, and asked Nova in Tigrilan, “I need a translation of what he said, as close as you can manage.”

Nova replied in Tigrilan, “The unusual word set translates with about 70% accuracy to ‘Warrior of Justice,’ and what little research I was able to do in the past 3 seconds indicates that it is a job worthy of respect.”

Kayden nodded, then held out his left hand, grasping Fuzz’s left arm just below the elbow. When Fuzz returned the gesture without even asking about it, Kayden gave a lightly startled smile, before saying, “I am proud of you.”

Nova piped up, this time in English, “It would be wise to exchange communications information, given the situation. His communicator can contact the relevant beings, if needed.”

When Fuzz reluctantly handed over his phone, Kayden quickly added two contacts and the respective numbers needed to contact either him or his other Battle Brother, Mal. Kayden handed it back, then said, “If you’re ever in trouble, for any reason, call either me or Mal. If it’s fighting trouble, call Mal right away, he’s better in a fight than I am. If either of us can get to you, we will.”

When Fuzz gave Kayden a look that said as clear as daylight that he was wondering what exactly he’d gotten himself into, Kayden smiled, before explaining, “We are as good as brothers now, and brothers stand up for brothers, they fight to protect each other.”

With the dropping of that bomb, Kayden finished his beef jerky, drank two bottles of water, and started to head back to the elevator.


#271

Team Greasy Lightning

Fuzz’s brain was awash with new information after his interaction with the Tigrilan Warrior. He stood in the lobby for a good ten minutes, slowly chewing his way through the snack-size bag of chips. When he suddenly realized how long he had been lost in thought, he immediately boarded the elevator and made his way to his team’s room.

He wasn’t particularly quiet when he opened the door. Darkness filled the space in front of him. The lights from the hallway cut enough through the inkiness that he was able to make out the shapes of two bodies in the far bed. Jen could be heard snoring in her not-entirely-subtle way.

Well, shit, he thought. I wanted to be next to the air conditioner. Oh well.

Fuzz closed the door, gently placed his bag at the end of the bed, and stripped off his shorts and t-shirt before crawling into his bed.

It completely slipped his mind to take his melatonin supplements…


#272

Team Wang Lao Ji - Best Western

J: zzzz
A: zzzzzzz
H: loud snoring
Jackie slams one of the drawers to stop Harry’s snoring


#273

Team Rockport

Zack is too stubborn to stop

Leo: Desperately trying to keep his eyes open Zaaack?
Zack: Yes, Leo?
Leo: Aren’t we stopping in Butte?
Zack: Eh… We’re past Butter, man. We’re actually past Homestake as well.
Leo: His face has a confused look now, despite both eyes being closed Wait, huh? We’re not stopping?
Zack: Well I’m still fine to drive so I thought, why not stretch to Hardin. We’ll stop at Hardin, book a nice room, get some sleep and also have our breakfast, fill the car up and then leave.
Leo: Fuck’s sake man.
Zack: You can go to sleep if you want now man. There’s the blanket back there.
Leo: Yeah got it, thanks. Drive safe. Let me know when we’re there. Immediately drifts off to sleep
Zack: Yeah, sleep tight Leo. Focuses on the road again

WE’RE ALMOST IN HARDIN BOIS.


#274

Previous time block

Saturday, 4AM - 6AM Eastern Time

Legend of Terms:

POI NOTE: I will NOT be pre-warning of upcoming POI points. I will ONLY auto-stop teams for two things: fuel and, when completely exhausted, rest. Anything else you want (including tourist POI, restaurants, premature fuel, rest at any point before complete exhaustion), YOU need to PM me in advance (before I run the time block that you’d complete it in). Also, please don’t map out everything from here to the end in one PM… try to keep it within a couple time blocks. Remember: Tourist POI and sit-down restaurants (not fast food) give bonuses to morale and fatigue, but take some time. Tourist POI also give points to the POI award at the end.

BD: Block Distance. This is the amount of mileage covered during the current 2 hour period.
OD: Overall Distance. This is the total distance that the team has covered since the event started.
FS: Fuel Status. Approximate fuel reading on the vehicle’s fuel gauge.
MRL: Morale modifier
FTG: Fatigue Level
Last Town: Last town of note that was passed (will not include tiny villages)
Next Waypoint: Should be self explanatory.
Weather Condition: Current weather condition at the end of the time block.
Notes: Any notes I have for your team during this time block. Including POI results, car issues, etc.

VicVictory:
BD: 0 mi OD: 952 mi FS: 1/2 MRL: +0 FTG: -7
Last Town: Sheridan, WY Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 54 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Fairfield Inn & Suites in Sheridan, WY.

@Elizipeazie:
BD: 0 mi OD: 782 mi FS: 3/4+ MRL: +0 FTG: -8
Last Town: Columbus, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 55 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Super 8 Motel in Columbus, MT

@BannedByAndroid:
BD: 0 mi OD: 822 mi FS: Full MRL: +0 FTG: -9
Last Town: Billings, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 54 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the (random airbnb they rented)
Ongoing issue: Vehicle is making a clunking noise from the front going over bumpy roads. SES light is on.

@kobacrashi:
BD: 0 mi OD: 822 mi FS: FULL MRL: +0 FTG: -9
Last Town: Billings, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 55 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Best Western Plus in Billings, MT.
Ongoing issue: Car is making a grinding noise when turning right.

@Madrias:
BD: 0 mi OD: 952 mi FS: 1/3 MRL: +0 FTG: -10
Last Town: Sheridan, WY Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 54 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Fairfield Inn & Suites in Sheridan, WY.
Ongoing issue: Rattling noise in engine.

@yangx2:
BD: 0 mi OD: 822 mi FS: FULL MRL: +0 FTG: -9
Last Town: Bozeman, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 55 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Best Western Plus in Billings, MT

@mart1n2005:
BD: 0 mi OD: 681 mi FS: FULL MRL: +0 FTG: -10
Last Town: Bozeman, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 55 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Comfort Suites in Bozeman, MT
Ongoing issue: Jury-rigged RR suspension mount. Unknown how long it will hold.

@Mikonp7:
BD: 164 mi OD: 848 mi FS: FULL MRL: +0 FTG: +4
Last Town: Billings, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 55 degrees, clear
Notes: Team has refueled in Billings, MT
Ongoing issue: Oil pressure gauge is reading slightly low toward the end of the time period. Routine check at last fillup indicates car is losing oil at an abnormally high rate. Team has used some oil from spare stocks to refill.

@Centurion_23:
BD: 0 mi OD: 822 mi FS: FULL MRL: +0 FTG: -10
Last Town: Billings, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 55 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Best Western Plus in Billings, MT.

@Xepy:
BD: 29 mi OD: 822 mi FS: 1/2 MRL: +1 FTG: -7
Last Town: Billings, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 56 degrees, clear
Notes: Team has stopped for the night at the Best Western Plus in Billings, MT

@Private_Miros:
BD: 0 mi OD: 681 mi FS: FULL MRL: +0 FTG: -6
Last Town: Bozeman, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 55 degrees, clear
Notes: Team awakens at 5a ET and will be on the road at the beginning of the next time block.
Ongoing issues: SES light is on, transmission slipping slightly.

@Boiled_Steak:
BD: 0 mi OD: 822 mi FS: 1/2- MRL: -3 FTG: -12
Last Town: Billings, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 56 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Best Western Plus in Billings
Ongoing issue: Slight hesitation at high speed. More pronounced now that the speed limit has increased. Radiator has failed, and team cannot move until it is fixed.

@GetWrekt01:
BD: 79 mi OD: 911 mi FS: 2/3 MRL: +0 FTG: +4
Last Town: Hardin, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 54 degrees, clear
Notes: Team has stopped for the night at the Lariat Motel in Hardin, MT

@Ryan93:
BD: 0 mi OD: 283 mi FS: FULL MRL: +0 FTG: -8
Last Town: Spokane, WA Next Waypoint: Lookout Pass
Weather Condition: 57 degrees, clear
Notes: Team wakes up at 5a ET and will be on the road at the start of the next time period. Team is NOT fully rested.

@abg7:
BD: 83 mi OD: 764 mi FS: 3/4+ MRL: +0 FTG: +0
Last Town: Big Timber, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 56 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is on the road at 5a ET.

@Radster:
BD: 0 mi OD: 681 mi FS: 2/3+ MRL: +0 FTG: -8
Last Town: Bozeman, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 54 degrees, clear
Notes: Team wakes up at 530a ET and will be on the road 30 minutes into the next time block.

@SkylineFTW97:
BD: 0 mi OD: 822 mi FS: 2/3- MRL: +0 FTG: -7
Last Town: Billings, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 55 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Best Western Plus in Billings, MT.

@findRED19:
BD: 0 mi OD: 952 mi FS: FULL MRL: +1 FTG: -7
Last Town: Sheridan, WY Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 55 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Fairfield Inn & Suites in Sheridan, WY.

@Jaimz:
BD: 0 mi OD: 598 mi FS: FULL MRL: +2 FTG: +0
Last Town: Butte, MT Next Waypoint: Gallatin County Fairground
Weather Condition: 56 degrees, clear
Notes: Team wakes up at 6a ET and will be on the road 1 hour into the next time block.
Ongoing issues: Car has a squeak and slight lateral shift of the rear going over bigger bumps. Small crack in windshield.

@Caligo:
BD: 0 mi OD: 681 mi FS: FULL MRL: +1 FTG: -12
Last Town: Bozeman, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 55 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Comfort Suites in Bozeman.
Ongoing issue: There is a slight smell of fuel in the cab.

@Aaron.W:
BD: 0 mi OD: 822 mi FS: 2/3 MRL: +0 FTG: -11
Last Town: Billings, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 55 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Best Western Plus in Billings.
Ongoing issue: AC compressor failure (irrepairable, comfort penalty)

@Keikyun:
BD: 0 mi OD: 822 mi FS: FULL MRL: +0 FTG: -7
Last Town: Billings, MT Next Waypoint: Sturgis Motorcycle Museum
Weather Condition: 54 degrees, clear
Notes: Team is asleep at the Best Western Plus in BIllings.

Vehicles that are traveling in packs:
None that are on the road currently

Note: vehicles within ~5 miles of each other are within CB range. Group chats via social media are available.


Team Greasy Lightning

Fuzz rolled over in exhausted frustration. His mind was still racing, having met a real live alien, and not even being able to tell Rick and Jen about it. His two bastard teammates who could sleep through nuclear war, who were sawing logs just feet away from him, who were in dreamtime bliss.

As opposed to Fuzz. His waking hell was of his own doing. It was at this moment that he realized he had forgotten his sleep supplements. He sighed and rose from the bed slowly. He retrieved his bag and opened it up, rummaging around inside for the jar of melatonin drops. His hand brushed against rounded glass, which he snatched and produced from underneath one of his spare shirts.

Fuzz proceeded to unscrew the jar, but when he reached inside, his fingers didn’t come into contact with the chewable gels he expected. Instead, he felt something squishy, and a foul odor arose from the jar.

“Ah, fuck,” he muttered.

He shuffled over to the bathroom sink to wash off the offending substance. When he flicked on the light, he saw that he had accidentally pulled out a jar of vegemite.

Fuzz stopped. He grinned, and then cackled evilly, washed up, and put his shorts and shirt back on.

15 minutes later

Fuzz stood back, admiring his handywork. Goosebumps rose on his bare arms, though that was as much from the crisp pre-dawn air as it was for his artistic genius.

Parked by its lonesome in a corner of the lot, taking up nearly four stalls, sat the Torg limo of Pit Stop US, freshly decorated in brown, smudgy, and disgusting-smelling phalluses, all over every surface of glass the stretch-body sedan had.

Fuzz walked toward the hotel lobby, glancing in the opposite direction from the Torg. Another sight to behold. One Sinistra Traville, painted with foul-odored, brown whiskers next to both sets of headlights, and what could be mistaken either for a snake or a tail along the top of the trunk.

The medicine was finally kicking in, and Fuzz let out a great yawn. He discarded the empty vegemite jar in the trash can just outside the lobby, and headed back up to the room.



#275

Team Trinity

Alice had a stressful day. That meeting with the Tiger-aliens was draining. A good night’s sleep, even if the team had planned to get a move on early, was exactly waht she needed.

And then there was that damn cat.

Ivy Mike had jumped up the window sill in the room next door at around 2 am and started mewing incessantly. She tried to ignore it, hoped that one of the other teams or guests would shout or complain, but nothing but the cries of the cat followed.

She was about to shout in frustration, when John suddenly rang her room and told her that Ivy Mike was right - what do you mean; right? - and that they should move on early, and by the way “I hope I didn’t call you up just now? No thanks John”. She was not happy.

But things be as they are, and a shower and a fuel station bagel later, the team was ready to get back on the road.


#276

Team Rockport

Rare Sighting of a Familiar Car

Leo: Mumbles in half sleep state Man… are we there yet…
Zack: Sigh Just a few more miles. 10 or so.
Leo: Ah nice, I’ll try to stay awake then.
Zack: Don’t take any coffee, we need to sleep after reaching the hotel.
Leo: I know I know…

A few minutes later

Leo: Lariat Motel right?
Zack: Yeah, it should be two more blocks ahead…
Leo: I see the sign… ooh looks nice!
Zack: I didn’t want to stay at a rinky dinky motel after this much toil.
Leo: That’s very thoughtful of you man! Thank you, we’ll split the bills if you… WHAT THE FUCK IS THAT!
Zack: What? What? What did you see? Looks around hastily
Leo: There! 4 o’ clock.
Zack: Wait… WHAT THE FUCK! Brakes hard

Both men gasp in horror as they witness the abomination that stands in front of them

Leo: Uh… Team Eyelashes had an orange car right?
Zack: They did… and their’s didn’t look… this hideous!
Leo: Man… I don’t even know what to say, it’s creeping the fuck outta me.
Zack: Take a picture, in case we ever need it. You know whoever has such an awful taste… could be a murderer as well!
Leo: Right, Takes a photo hastily Taken! Go now, park at the other side, nowhere near this thing!

Zack puts his foot on the pedal gently to move away from the absolutely disgusting thing they just witnessed. They will now park on the other side of the parking lot of Lariat Motel and spend a couple of hours to get some sleep and breakfast

OH! Here’s the “thing” they saw:


#277

Team “Buy Skyrim”

Everyone is sleeping. But at 3:30 am Nathan woke up, eat some bread, and went to fix the car armed with a toolkit and a head-mounted LED light.


#278

Team Harcourt-Entwhistle

Stage "Oh my god is that the time???"


What actually happens…
Clock - It’s 5:55…almost time to wake them up…

@6am

Clock - Wakey, Wakey people…time to get up and fix the car for the day ahead


What Spanners and Mopey hear…

Clock - Bzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzt…


#279

Team Tiger Trouble


Up in their shared room, Kayden quietly sent a message to Mal, letting him know about Fuzz becoming his battle brother, and that he could call on either of them for help. Mal responded in his usual way, with promises to bring violence on those who deserved it, and that he was always ready for a good fight.

After a while, Kayden laid back down, slowly falling asleep again, just in time for Kaylie to kick the leg of the bed hard enough for it to hit the wall, and for her to wake up cursing.

“Twin Suns, that hurt!” She growled out, before dropping back to Tigrilan for access to less polite language.


#280

6am local time is only at the end of the next time block.


#281

Maroon Marauders - Part 6

Morning of Day 2, Bozeman, Montana

The Maroon Marauders got up and packed their belongings fairly early in the morning - a consequence of their early rest stop booking. They checked out, headed for the next waypoint and resumed driving at their usual pace. Soon after, Denny remarked: “Several teams made a rest stop later than we did, but one of them appears to be delayed by persistent mechanical problems, so at least we have some hope of catching up to the rest of the field. In the meantime, I’ll keep you posted on any further information regarding other teams - or ourselves. Stay alert, everyone, for we still have a long way to go.”

And so the Maroon Marauders’ second day on the road began.


#282

Ah, thanks. Wondered by it says 4A-6A…
.
.
.
.
.
.
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[/SARCASM_MODE=OFF]


#283

Because it’s 4-6 east coast time.

It’s 2-4 where your team is (provided you’re already in Montana).


#284

According to the narrative my team’s waking up at the end of the time block…so…

Apologies, that was so undignified and juvenile of me but I can’t bring myself to remove it and will blame my Alzheimers for the outburst.

Erm…what outburst?

Shhhh…


#285

Gran has an excuse. But Mopey? OK, well, he’s an idiot and has an excuse. But Spanners? Ok probably took one too many spanners to the head.