Once More (Unto the Breach) [FINAL RESULTS]

corrected.

1 Like

Team “Buy Skyrim” isn’t coming either.

1 Like

OOC:
The D-Team is too busy arguing over what radio station to listen to, they won’t be stopping for that food-stop sadly, only the nearest Waffle Home.

1 Like

Team Tiger Trouble


Jaden looked over to Kayden, then to Kaylie, before asking Nova, “Are we able to eat that stuff?”

Nova quickly ran through the ingredients before returning the answer, “You can, but the cheese may cause a certain amount of intestinal distress. I would not advise the consumption of these food items.”

Jaden nodded, before keying the radio.

“Yeah, we’re going to have to pass on that offer. We are a little unwilling to-” Jaden started to say, before Kayden cut him off with, “We aren’t going to deal with gas like that. The cheeseburger at lunch yesterday was bad enough.”

Before Jaden could let go of the button, there was a loud screech of tires, followed by Kayden swearing in Tigrilan at the driver in front of them. The sound of a window motor was heard, followed shortly by a deep inhale and a savage roar from Kayden. At the same time, there was a muffled thump as Jaden’s hand hit the dashboard, followed by Jaden’s shocked exclamation, “By the Seven Sisters, why is the air coming from these vents cold!?”

Kaylie looked at the dashboard, trying to make sense of the controls and what had changed. “There is a light on over the snowflake button.”

Jaden, at this point, realized he was still holding down the radio button, and let go while he tried to figure out how to turn off the air conditioning.

3 Likes

Team Rockport

Leo: I asked them if they wanted some food from the drive-through I’d be going in but no response came. Now half of them are going with no refills for their stomach :rofl:
Zack: I have to say it was thoughtful of you to get some food while being in the traffic jam, I’m all energized and ready to go now

lmao just an innocent jab and way to boost my crew’s morale guys, nothing serious

2 Likes

Greasy Lightning

Fuzz is quite amused by the tigers’ inability to operate aircon properly.

Jen and Rick exchange knowing glances, hoping that Fuzz doesn’t get the idea of challenging them to a fart-off.

2 Likes

Team Eyelashes

Artur grabbed the handle on Team Eyelashes’ CB.
“Sure. We will be there too.”
“Kurwa!” (Fuck!) Krzysztof, driving the car, was audible as well.
After that, scraping, crunching and other sounds associated with kissing a guard rail were also very, very audible.
“Ja pierd…” (Ah, sh…) “-erm, we will…likely be late.”

Artur then let go of the radio button.

“Co się do jasnej cholery stało?” (What, for god’s sake, happened?)
“Eh… Dobre pytanie. Heheh.” (Eh, good question, heheh.)
“…Nic ci nie jest?” (“You alright?”)
“Mnie nic. A tobie?” (“I’m alright, you?”)
“Spoko, jest dobrze. Wyjdźmy zobaczyć co z autem.” (“No worries, I’m good too. Let’s see the damage.”)

The two left the car, examined the damage. Krzysztof, hands shaking, bent the eyelashes down so that it looked like the “eye” was closed instead of broken. Didn’t work that well.

“Jesteś w stanie prowadzić?” (Hey, can you drive after that?)
“…” (…)
“Jasne.” (Of course)

The two switched places. Artur attempted to move forward, determined the car is drivable, and carried on.
“Zajedziemy po drodze do restauracji,” (We’ll stop at a restaurant) Artur said.
“…Dopiero co mieliśmy opóźnienie.” (We’ve just had a delay.)
“Tak. Wiem. Wkurwia mnie to niemiłosiernie” (Yes. I know. Pisses me off immensely.)
“I co, będzie ko-” (And so there will be ano-)
“Tak, będzie kolejne.” (Yes, there will be another one) “Muszę jakoś rozładować emocje, a kto wie, może ktoś ma mniej szczęścia od nas.” (I have to somehow calm my emotions and, who knows, maybe someone’s more unlucky than us.)
“Co to za miejsce?” (What kinda place is this?)
“Eh, jakaś pizzeria-ukośnik-makaroniarnia” (Eh, some kinda pizza-slash-pasta place.)
“W zasadzie, przyda się coś na ząb.” (You know, I could go for a bite of something,)
“Ty stawiasz.” (You’re paying.)
“…?” (…?)

6 Likes

Day 0: The beginning before the beginning of the beginning

Another prequel bois

“Zack…,” says Leo, looking at Zack with a glare, “It’s time brother.”
“I know, 12 hours till the race starts. We’ve put all of our efforts into this car. We fixed whatever problems we found. Or at least attempted to fix them and now it works great. Let’s just hope the injector stays in place.”
“It should, you know how good I am at stuff like this,” says Leo with a hint of pride.
Zack chuckles a bit, “Well we’ll see. Let’s have one good night’s sleep then head for our destination. It’s like 50 kilometers away right?”
“Just about 50, yeah. We’d be there in a breeze in this car.”
“Aight man. I’ll serve dinner while you prepare our stuff”, said Zack as he headed towards the kitchen of their hotel room.
“Sounds good!”, replied Leo as he proceeded towards packing their shit up.


Car Specs for the curious people:
4 Liter Crossplane Oversquare V8 with DI Per Cylinder and Performance intakes, pushing as far as 395 hp and 420 nm torque.
0-60 time of around 4.7 seconds, somewhere around 30 mpg.
Has electronic LSD, ESC, Variable Hydraulic PS and All Alu chassis/panel combo.
Wishbone/Multilink combo with standard semi active suspensions.
Super fucking loud, and that’s a feature.

3 Likes

Team Less Than Three pt.1

With the majority of the drivers stopped by the same stop and go traffic, there wasn’t really any action going on with Team <3 past the usual for now. Their car was not even as noisy as many of the others, with any sound of Jeff yelling at the traffic muffled out by the bass notes on the Kuma’s subwoofer’s or the Kuma’s own exhaust. The CB radio which Eileen had yet to figure out how to use properly had a fair amount, though it was mostly ignored by the couple until the mention of food.

“Oooh, I could use a bite. Yes we would like to come.” Eileen replied, not actually transmitting anything.

“Don’t think you sent anything over.” Jeff said “Usually it makes like a sound I think when its done. Did you press the button.”

“Oh there’s a button.” Eileen held down the radio button. “I think it’s working now?”

Jeff held down the Kuma’s horn for a moment. “Come on! Fucking traffic!”

“Jeff! You want food too right?” Eileen spoke away from the radio, though clearly audible. Also the bass notes from the subwoofers were also clearly audible as noise.

“Yeah, sure.”

“Hello hello, yes we would like to join in the pizza.” Eileen said into the handle. More bass notes transmitted through afterwards before they actually stopped transmitting.

4 Likes

Team Trinity

The rest of the traffic jam was uneventful. John taking notes of the plentiful CB conversations going. MAtthew getting annoyed by the plentiful BC conversations going. Alice with her headset on listening to music. Ivy Mike sleeping and occasionaly twisting its ears at the CB prattle accompanied by an annoyed twist of his tail. Matthew felt sudden affection for Ivy Mike. Softened, he felt like saying something to John.

Kurwa, sounds fun to say. Kurwa, kurwa, kurwa. Sits well in the mouth. Hope they are alright though, that sounded like a crash.

I wouldn’t, not in the company of a lady, John interceded.

Why not? It’s just a swear word. For fuck sake.

Yes, only it doesn’t really mean that, common usage aside.

Really now, how do you know that, John?

Mówię po polsku. A leftover from a mission - one of my first abroad - back in 1985; an investigation into the murder of a famous catholic member of the opposition against the regime.

Ah, cold war stories. You were too young then to be stuck in that period.

Then? It might not be Poland now obviously, but it never ended. Russia, DPRK, Iran, Pakistan. France!

France?

6 Likes

OOC: Bruh how can you read thoughts lmao. Those are words from John’s head, not in the CB

1 Like

Geez, I thought they are using the CB. Thanks for the reminder.

1 Like

I’ll make that abundantly clear in that case , as in:

CB:

Team Trinity here, skipping the pizza and moving to the waypoint after this traffic jam asap!

Though it’s a conversation between Matthew and John, alternating.

2 Likes

TEAM BAKEWELL BOXER

Part 1 : Traffic Jam

Previous Part


the traffic jam was lagged on, but the antics over the cb radio kept the two immensely entertained especially the ‘furries’ who had gotten very into their cosplaying ; )

CB :

Redwood: “Hello people! If anyone is interested in some frinds-making, we can meet up at Beau’s Pizza & Pasta, 124 E 1st St, Cle Elum, WA 98922. Should be about 30 miles down the road from here.”

In Car:

Mandy: “fancy some pizza then eh Connor”

Connor “won’t that make us lose some time?”

“yes but we can also do a bit of scouting for the competition … plus I’ve heard it gets a little pranky on these things so let’s not miss out on the action” Mandy grinned at Connor with the seeds of a plan growing in her eyes “why don’t you find out what’s on the menu in the meantime”

CB:

"you can put us down for a bite to eat, that’ll be a table for two @Elizipeazie " Mandy then released the transmitter

In Car:

Connor: “aaha! I’ve found it here’s what’s on the menu

Connor then proceeds to ready out the menu

Mandy: " aye nice! keep that tab open for when we get there"


OOC: PM me on discord if you would like to be the subject of some pranking :stuck_out_tongue_closed_eyes:

5 Likes

Stage 1

Gran - I went to speak to the organisers and they wouldn’t tell me what was in the box…and I don’t feel comfortable carrying hushed voice…contraband, in the car.

Spanners - Don’t worry Mrs E everytthing will be fi…

WHACK

Spanners - …what the fu…

Gran - DAVID!!!

Spanners - …flippin’ heck was that?

Mopey - A rock has hit the windscreen…it’s got a crack but it’s not serio…oh wait, it’s getting worse. We have a replacement don’t we?

Spanners - Hahahhahahahaha…damn you fate…I couldn’t get a spare in time and a car this age would have been a custom jobby…so no!

Gran - Oh dear…why does the car feel like it’s crabbing?

Spanners - Because the steel I’ve welded in places, although great welds, aren’t in a position to stop the car “flexing”.

Gran - George, I believe you bought a car that may actually kill me…and as it’s a hearse it would be rather apt.

Mopey - Honestly Gran it’s fine. Isn’t it Spanners?

Spanners - Honestly? Erm probably. Anyway, I’ll buy some resin and pour it into the cracks…hopefully that will suffice. After all it can’t get any worse…can it?

Gran - And the squeak?

Spanners - Just the suspension settling in.

Mopey looks at Spanners who shakes his head…

6 Likes

RK Series Racing; Chapter I.III; Getting the tables set

After recieving numerous replies from other teams and noting the accepting ones, he goes back to the CB radio:

Redwood: [motivated] "RK Series Racing racing here. If i got everyone right i have these teams meeing us at the Pizza place…

He looks down at the list he made and then reads them off one by one.

Team “Buy Skirim”. Very creative name, by the way… Team Stokes, The Thompson Family; Team Eyelashes, Team Less Than Three… Another marvel of originality here. IN A GOOD WAY! And last but not least team Bakewell Boxer.

The handle is handed over and the energetic voice of Redwood
is replaced by the neutral and clear-cut voice of Connor.

Connor: [in the most neutral voice imaginable] “In total, the planned meetup will consist of seventeen people spread over seven different teams. RK Series Racing will try and organize a table seating everyone. Consideing the size and normal traffic at Beau’s Pizza and Pasta, this might not be possible. I will update you on the table reservation progress.”

After the transmission has ended, they set on about reserving seats.
Or… more accurately, Connor does so.
He discovers that Beau’s Pizza and Pasta only has table seating three to five people, though cramming a sixth person on one is not impossible.*
He picks the handle up again:

Connor: “RK Series Racing contacting everyone visiting Beau’s Pizza and Pasta at 124 E 1st St, Cle Elum, WA 98922, USA. The owner is informed of seventeen people showing up within the next three hours. They have tables seating up to five people in regular arrangement. If need arises, a sixth chare can be taken from an unused one. This information is meant to allow everyone visiting to plan ahead and thus avoid unnecessary conflicts for seating.”

Redwood: “Nice! We’ll make friends!”
Tonsom: “Whatever…” [to Connor] “Listen you plastic fucker. You please stay in the car. I don’t want to attract unnecessary attention with you in that restaurant.”
Connor: [without any resisting whatsoever] “Got it.”


OOC:

*I actually looked that place up. They have round tables with seating for 5, maybe six.

note: @VicVictory is it possible to post an arrival time at the reastaurant for those stopping?

EDIT:
@Mythrin need 'ya Discord ID for that

7 Likes

TEAM COYOTE JIM


Upon hearing everything about pizza on the radio, Coyote decides to tune in.

Coyote Jim: “Hey, would it be too late to ask for two more mediums with cheese? Cheers.”

The things we do for pizza.
@Elizipeazie

5 Likes

Last Part

Team Treadkillers


Still in the stand both of them look at the other cars. While Thomas is talking about which car will break first and how, Fynn is focused on getting some nice video shots of the other cars, which isnt his easiest task. He know how to film low sportcars, not towering Semi trucks.

After the rally started, Thomas and Fynn were excited to finally let the ,now called “Boostbucket”, let free on the wide freedom ways of america. It didnt took them long to get stuck with everybody else in the massiv traffic jam.

“Immerhin haben wir jetzt Zeit für das Intro.” Fynn says as he screws in the last cam into the interior trim.
“Also, Du weißt wie das geht. Lächeln, Intro und du selber sein.” (“At least we got time for the intro now. So you know how this works. Smile Intro and then be yourself”)

With a flick the light on the cams start to glow a piercing red.

“Haaaalllooo an unsere Boosters da draußen”, Fynn starts the intro with a perfect Youtuber face.
“Heute auf dem Travel-Channel: Ich und Thomas ; Sag Hallo” Thomas is waving to the cams, “wir sind auf einer Rally von Sea…” “Hello people! If…" (“Hello out there Boosters! Today on your travel channel: Me and Thomas are doing a road rally from Sea…”)

The CB Radio speaks up. With a quick panic motion Fynn tries to turn it off, but also rips on of the cams out of its socket.

“MANN KACKE EH. Jetzt muss ich alles noch mal machen…” (“AHHH FUCK. Now i gotta redo everything”)


Being sleepy and having to deal with that is not really cool. Imma give myself that -1 MRL for that :stuck_out_tongue:

4 Likes

RK Series Racing; Chapter I.IV

Redwood: “Someone else wants to join. Seems to be the Wile E. Coyote clone…”
Tonsom: “YES!” [turns to Connor] “You need to come in as well! The team we want is there as well!”
Connor: [confused due to conflicting orders] “Okay…”

Into CB:

Redwood: “Sure thing! You gotta order youself though. We won’t pay for your food, 'ya know?”

5 Likes

TRAGGIOGIO'S BIZARRE ADVENTURE: SHITBOX CRUSADERS EP.1: ROAD ROLLER TRAFFIC

The traffic jam was doing no wonders for the team’s morale, particularly DAVID who could not really do much other than man the controls of the van, nicknamed “Giovanna” after Giorno Giovanna and bc it’s a van, but the automatic gearbox was a great decision, as was to pack many, many volumes of manga for the others to read. Chatter from the CB radio was heard in the background, especially the talk of the “furries” which was highly entertaining.

DAVID: “These Thundercats clones are quite comical.”

HARUKI: “I think these might be the furries I hear about so often. They are funny though!”, as he continues reading the service manuals for Konosubaru and Kiaqua vans.

The furry “roleplaying” provided a great source of entertainment. Meanwhile in the back row, Emily and Yuri were talking about their lives ever since they last saw each other.

EMILY: “Being home for such a long time non-stop… I can’t bear it.”

YURI: “That was my life, I spent so long back home I never made friends, never got anything done. I was lucky I didn’t starve and run out of money…”

EMILY: “At least you’re out, and doing what you love.” she spoke, while reading through the manga of Neon Genesis Evangelion, which Yuri only just noticed after staring out at the traffic for so long.

YURI: “Are you reading the manga of Evangelion?”

EMILY: “Indeed.”

YURI: “I remember watching that… it was depressing. It kind of helped me try doing something…”

EMILY: “Want to read it together?”

YURI: “How about it? It might be different to read it now I am outside and doing something with my life…”

[Space reserved for extra interaction!]

6 Likes