Congratulations. The Automation crew has been hired by a very tall, very fat, very bald rich man to perform a series of heists around the Salt Lake City area. Which User(s), and their company’s car(s) which you take with you. Which function would each perform? How well would it work? How bad would it fuck up?
Well, if one of the heists is in a small area or one that we’re not going to be able to get a van into, this should do: a Flug Episilon SP (@squidhead) . 0-60 in 7.9 seconds when new, could easily be tuned up and most important, that tiny wheelbase will make it great at evading any pursuing vehicles. This could be used to carry whatever we’re stealing, although as an escort vehicle I think it’d be just as good.
Vans. Fast ones. I’m thinking a number of Monolith V-200 and V-400 with the optional AWD, heavy duty hydropneumatic suspension and custom-fitted IMP VL64FET engines will do perfectly fine. Fuck you I’m not going to pass this opportunity to show off the superb durability and performance of my own vehicles (for marketing purposes). While the heists take place imma need a decoy to keep most of the Salt Lake City PD busy with a highly destructive slow-speed chase. Does anyone here manufacture tanks? Since I am not going to sacrifice anyone I’ll also need something to pick the decoy up with something way faster than any police vehicle including helicopters. I’ll need some Gryphon Gear hardware…
Desired Result: Collateral damage in the millions, heists successful, everyone happy except police. No casualties except the US economy.
Most likely result: Collateral damage in the billions, USAF destroying half the city, more casualties than Man of Steel, including crew.
Well, when I get around to the Muscle Car era, my company will have a nice distraction vehicle, as what cop doesn’t want to try their hand at chasing a Bigblock powered muscle car around the city? …(well, the cops who are not gear heads I suppose)
Chase comes with standard equipment including but not limited to:
- Wheel Spin
- Tire Smoke
- Power-sliding and Drifting
- More wheel spin
- More tire smoke
- Jumps!
- Stunt Driving
- Muscle car exhaust note
- One liners
- Fancy wheel spin and tire smoke U turns
- Fancy over-steering, tire smoke filled 90 degree turns
- Moar Jumps!
- Near Misses
- Moar wheel spin!
- Moar tire smoke!
Desired Result: Mass chaos and cop car destruction, Extremely well executed distraction, and the police and the feds don’t even know what was really going on in the entire duration of the chase!
Most Likely Result: Spin-out in the second turn causes driver to crash into light post, crippling the radiator and causing them to be caught. Then cops get tip about the real event that was just started, and heist fails miserably on live TV. I can see the headlines now:
Local Stunt Driver Fails, Exposing Huge Heist Before it Even Begins!
We are SO arrested
A Petoskey Enforcer.
Uploading…
Why evade the cops when you can blend in with them and disappear?
Also the 301 TriForce V8 is a pretty badass engine.
Nice idea, hiding in plain sight!
Somebody called?
Hannah would never allow it but the Normandy van @Vos_Nox himself gifted the GG crew would do nicely. With more grunt than a drag truck and more verve than a Super V8, we could load it up and haul some serious ass.
However, we would hesitate to actually take @Vos_Nox with us. He is apparently a known terrorist, besides, he officially vanished in a giant atomic fireball a while ago, and it would be horribly suspicious.
If we had the mod squad with us, namely, @pyrlix and @Kubboz, we’d have some serious firepower onside.
I thought we were here for a heist, not to start WW3, 4 and 5
Speaking of what I may, or may not, be here to do. When the hell are we getting BSLL2?
Frankly I have no idea. First, there’s not having time, second, there’s due to not having time, inspiration for the whole fiction thing being at an all time low.
Clears throat and points at himself. Implying, in no uncertain terms, that he is, in fact, creative as fuck.
I know you and a whole bunch of other people are keen, but selfish as it sounds, if I cede creative controls over BSLL I also point an armed nuke at the entire lore related to my own company. I’m not quite that adventurous.
Dude. You’d be like Sony giving Marvel back creative control of Spiderman. Let us write the lore, and if anything involves you or your lil company, we’ll spit a PM at you and get your permission.
I don’t think that analogy works Not that I would know, since I’m an anomaly among my demographic and don’t really care that much about Marvel (or DC), nor Spiderman.
Also now is a very bad time to be thinking about making decisions about all that, because I’m about this close to saying fuck it and nuking the lot myself.
i for one, would NOT pick a supercar. rather just an above-average-fast. because:
- you can’t refuel in the middle of a chase.
- a car too low would just get stuck when it needs to go over a significant bump, it’s not a track
so i’ll go with something that can go offroad with reasonable economy and power.
you never seen an offroad heist have you? well neither do i
Fast & Furious (4) is about as close as I’ve seen. Throw in the bus scene from F&F 7, and we have a party!