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Roulette Runner [FINAL RESULTS]



Blake: I could use a beer right about now.

Marc: Hell no, that’s the last thing Caroline needs to hear is that her husband got busted by his teammate for DWI.

Blake: Okay, okay, I was just saying how good one would sound.

Marc: I’m just messing with you, you know me, I tease rough.

(Phone rings)

Marc: That’s mine… Hello? Hey Luigi, what’s up? She’s a little sluggish but she’s holding together. Hello? What was that? (looks at phone) Bah, shitty signal! Yeah… I can hear you… Things are going well… No, my blood pressure has not been driven up by this trip… No, it’s not low because of ED… What was that? You’re breaking up… Okay, bye.

Blake: What did Luigi want?

Marc: Just calling to check on us. I’ve only got one bar, and it was coming in rough. I think he finished the call by calling me a tyke.

Blake: Uh, yeah, I’m sure that’s what he said.

Marc: You should’ve seen that new kid hear us going back and forth. He was mortified.

Blake: Ah, the new age people in an old timers environment. He should come around.

Marc: Looks like some rain is starting to fall.

Blake: Yup, a pity, some of those areas look like a good spot to get a picture of the car.

Marc: We could’ve gotten here sooner and beat the rain.

Blake: True, but I don’t want to push the car too hard unless I have to.

(Arrival at Deer Pass)

Blake: Put some burgers under the hood, I’m gonna run a scan on the car again.

Marc: Wrapped up and good to go, anything new?

Blake: Nope, just the four cylinders that it was going mental over before.

Marc: That’s good. I gotta say I’m feeling much better about this than I did a few hours ago. Luigi really knows his stuff.

Blake: Yeah, too bad the Enforcer’s been discontinued, he knew those babies inside out.

Marc: I’m glad he didn’t forget all of it to make room for the new cars.

Blake: Anyway, here’s a good spot to stretch our legs, I almost forgot what a smooth road feels like.

Marc: It’s your own damn fault, if you didn’t decide to grow old you wouldn’t be sore and aching.

Blake: You’re only four years younger than me, I don’t think you can rag on me for being old.


##Team Cignale
The Full Adventure
Car & Team
Day 0
Day 1 Leg 1
Day 1 Leg 2

Day 1 Leg 3
-Must say, this adventure is fun, thanks Giacomino for taking us with you.
-My plesure…(mumbling something)
-I only hope this clouds do not betray us, i planned a good BBQ for lunch
-Ribs and steak?
-Yes, and some red pepper.
-Wow, where we should be for lunch?
-Here, should be a good place to stop (indicates a point on the map).
-This road is not that bad
-Yes, compared it with the one in the leg 2 this is a motorway
-Fire up this stereo

-It’s not summer but i think this is a masterpiece without time.
-Yes…a masterpiece…
-How was the time
-Good enough, a bit too fast
-I see that you are getting into the right mindset, go in the back, take me some snacks.

Day 1 Leg 4
-That sound again, even on the pavement, i hope for the best, i’m scared
-Don’t worry we have supplies for years…maybe months…ok, for some days.
-I am just sad about these clouds, i can’t see anything, but this road is even paved, easy.
-I have the right song for it (more or less)

-Come on, say it, croaker, now it started raining.
-Guys, guys, the hearse, it stopped
-Honk, honk

Day 1 Leg 5
-The sky is starting to clear out, now you can put in Jimmy Cliff
-Bla, bla…not your f**** business…kitchen boy
-Look, who’s talking…mama’s boy
-Guys, please stop, I need to concentrate for this leg.
-Wow, this road is mad…
-When we stop for lunch?
-Now we don’t have time, we are doing good, i want to win!
-Yes WIN

Day 1 Leg 6
-One […] Two…
-What are you counting?
-The other partecipants, they all stop here, i think to refuel.
-How much petrol is remaining?
-Over half tank
-Wow, we don’t need to stop.
-Hey, guys, do you remeber which song i put in earlier?
-RHCP, why?
-Can’t stop, i’m a f**** clairvoyant.
-Great Giacomo, perfect time this leg
-Yesss, but i need to eat, i’m starving.
-We can have a break after next leg

Day 1 Leg 7
-The noise is getting worse
-Now it’s metal
-Come on, just 2 miles and we finish the leg, so i can check
-It’s shaking
-Not good
[Huge rumble from the back, the van starts to bounce a bit and stops]

Maybe it’s better to cesnsor this part

-So this is the end?
-I think so, guys

-What do we do with all this things?
-We can start to eat something, then we can think of it.
-Let’s set up the gazebo and the table, the weather don’t look good.

[The recovery veichle stops by]
-You need help?
-No thanks, we are good, we will find a way to get out. You want to join us? Steaks are on the BBQ now.
…to be continued


Team Twin-Snail

Day 1, Leg 7

Before the Stage

“Weather’s getting worse. Let’s pack up and be ready to leave.” Luke said. The team worked quickly to get their supplies packed away, get settled in the car, and get up to the starting line.

As they got up to the starting line, the rain started to fall, and Luke flicked on the headlights and the wipers. The low-and-high beams flared bright, a result of Scott not being able to find the proper switch for the Sinistra’s headlights while they’d fixed the car initially.

Day 1, Leg 8

Luke floored it, planning on making up time overall.

“God, this car stinks!” Scott said. “I think the fluid leak’s gotten worse, and it’s now getting on the exhaust, or the transmission’s about to give up.”

“We’ll check the fluids later, and I’ll get that tube of sealant out of the trunk, the one we picked up at the gas station. See if we can slow the leak down.” Amy said.

The rest of the drive was done in silence, and they arrived at the checkpoint faster than expected.

Day 1, Leg 8 Aftermath

As the rain kept falling lightly, Linda opened up the trunk and grabbed a bottle of oil, topping up the engine’s need for oil. Luke cleaned the fluid off of the side of the transmission, then applied some sealant around the valve body. Amy added a bit more fluid to the transmission, and Scott opened a bag of chips, proceeding to get crumbs all over the back seat.

Car Condition:

Fluid leak increased from last leg. Possibly slowed with a smear of sealant, but only time will tell. Fluids topped up. Crumbs all over interior.

Team Condition:

MRL +4 overall. A combination between the long and boring drive and the smell of burning fluids has taken a bit of a toll on the team.


Day 1, Leg 8

Leg eight is essentially a service run; paved road, gentle ascent and great photo ops at the end. I’m starting to wish we’d found a Bastion or even an Ambassador as the confined cabin of the Kitten is really starting to grate on me… Oh, you want to know more about the run? We drove close to the speed limit to stay within our target, there was some rain and the photo ops were varied and plentiful. I’m soo glad this is only a two day race!

What is it with Bogliq and their incessantly cheerful blue hue? I can’t stand the Kitten’s cramped cabin and the minimalist interior just smacks of cost-cutting. The rain only served to remind me that I was the passenger and therefore had nothing better to do than look at the hole where our stereo had been…


Day 1, Leg 8

Car: No problems but many, MANY design flaws!

Crew: Looking at the Kitten the same way Gargamel looks at a smurf; stop being so cheerful, damnit! MRL -1 (+6 in total)


Team Riot Uncontrol

Leg 7
Aaron “This is pretty easy”
Paul “Not really what we came for”
Aaron " As long nothing breaks, everything is fine"
Paul “And I can give it some gas”
Aaron “Let put something through the megaphone”
Again Aaron holds his phone to the Megaphone
(( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=L397TWLwrUU ))
Paul “This makes this more Epic”

Leg 8
Paul “Got any other music to blast ?”
Aaron “Let me see. Yes i have”
The Megaphone blasts a new song (( https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tR3XY6wfSBw))
Paul “I hope we are not running out of music”
Aaron “I will manage”

After Leg 8
Paul “Damage Report!”
Aaron “Van runs, Megaphone blasts and people are getting annoyed”
Paul “Perfect”


Day 1 Leg 9 Data

Deer Pass to Niles via FR3300 and Northshore Road

The descent from Deer Pass is along a gently sloping road that turns back to pavement at the inlet of Long Lake (aptly named). It then skirts the north shore of the lake to the touristy community of Niles, near the outlet. Frequent peeks of the lake, and the ridge beyond, are afforded between breaks in the trees

The skies remain gray, and the rain turns steady. Grip on the unpaved FR3300 is poor. Northshore road is decent.

Length 23; Avg Grade 3; Max Grade 5 (Downhill from the pass)

LAE High (fast); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is getting a little worse.

LAE Medium (slow); MRL -1; Notes: Braking on the muddy hill with this beast is not fun.

LAE High (slow); MRL +0; Notes: None.

LAE Medium (fast); MRL -1; Notes: No music, road fatigue.

LAE High (fast); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is starting to set in.

LAE High (fast); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is starting to set in.

LAE DNF; MRL -5; Notes: CRITICAL FAILURE. Radiator side tanks cracked beyond repair, won’t hold coolant.

LAE High (Fast); MRL -1; Notes: Fatigue is growing.

LAE Exact; MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue plus flatulence.

LAE Low (fast); MRL -1; Notes: Cabin still smells of coolant, which makes the team nervous, given the large puddle and trail of coolant leading to the dead Zavir.

LAE High (slow); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is starting to set in.

LAE High (fast); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is getting worse, and it seems so is the noise from the throwout bearing.

LAE - High (slow); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is beginning to set in.

LAE - Medium (fast); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is starting to set in.

LAE - High (fast); MRL -1; Notes; Road fatigue is getting worse.

LAE Low (slow); MRL -3; Notes: Wipers are complete junk. Had to take this slow for safety reasons.

LAE High (slow); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is beginning to set in.

@titleguy1 / @ramthecowy
LAE High (slow); MRL -1; Road fatigue is beginning to set in.


#Team Arstotska

Mike: duuude, this is really starting to suck

Josh: yeah, this rain is loud.

Mike: bro, I’m tired, the road is very shitty condition, it’s very Taxing.

Josh: sucks

Mike: please bro can you take over the driving next stage? This is really starting to suck.

Josh: nah, there’s only a few more stages to go, you seem to have got this

Mike: please bro, please.

Josh: hmm… maaaayyyyybbbeeee


@VicVictory I’ll let your randomizer choose if Josh takes over, if not allowed then just continue on with Mike driving


Team Twin-Snail

Day 1, Leg 8

Before the Stage

“Weather’s getting worse.” Scott said, looking at the clouds.

“Yeah, and this thing’s already a bitch to stop. Now replace the dirt with some mud and our 215mm wide tires, with our brake fade, and our ailing transmission, and we’ve got a recipe for disaster.” Luke said.

Linda packed the umbrellas back into the doors, while Amy tried to get the crumbs out of her seat.

“God damn it, Scott! Your fuckin’ chip binge covered half of the car in crumbs!” Amy grumbled, sweeping a fistful of crumbs out of the car and then getting into her seat.

“I was hungry.”

“We have burgers, moron.”

Day 1, Leg 9

Luke rolled into the power this time, taking it easy on the transmission. As the Snail-Boat roared down the hill, Amy grabbed a pack of batteries from the glovebox and replaced the expired battery in the MP3 player. Linda then grabbed it and started up some modern pop music before Amy grabbed it back and changed the playlist.

“No. We’re not listening to some teenage brat with a voice that sounds like cats fighting in a metal shack. I’d rather put up with Luke’s classical music playlist than that.” Amy said, putting the MP3 player as far out of Linda’s reach as was physically possible in the car.

“But I haven’t listened to her since before we left.” Linda whined.

“Good. You’ve listened to her music within the recent week. I agree with Amy, it’s bad enough you blare that in the house so I can’t get away from it, we don’t need it in the car.” Scott replied.

“Luke, make them stop being mean.”

“Sorry, busy driving, and given that the three of you have been running the playlist lately, it’s my turn anyway.” Luke said. “And, just for the record, my vote doesn’t count between you three. Two against one, so the modern pop playlist has been vetoed. Plus, keep in mind who sourced this cassette adapter, and this cassette-to-8-track adapter. And if you keep complaining about poor choices in music, I think I’ve got a couple actual 8-track tapes in here.”

“Oh no.” Linda said. “But that’s all music my grandparents listened to.”

“Just think about that before you start with begging over music. Borrow it at the mid-point of the race if you must, but use headphones. If we make it that far.” Luke said, ending the argument.

Each time Luke hit the brakes going down the hill, they slid more than they stopped, nearly 2-and-a-half tons of 70’s vintage steel shoving them forward with an alarming amount of force.

The engine’s growling roar was surprisingly complimented by the quiet classical music playing from the Sinistra’s old radio, along with the quiet-yet-sharp clicking of the relay-controlled windshield wipers.

As they reached Northshore Road, and the tires touched pavement, Luke gave the old Snail-Boat a bit more gas, trying to make up a little time. They arrived in Niles a little later than expected, and the team seemed a slight hint road weary, though it may have just been an after-effect of the weather.

Day 1, Leg 9 Aftermath

“Well, with that much rain, it’ll have washed any evidence off the transmission as to whether the smeared sealant worked to slow the leak, so just top everything up as usual.” Luke said.

Linda made a grab for the MP3 player, only for Amy, who happened to be just a little taller, to hold it out of her reach. “Seriously, gimme it!”

“No. You had your turn, you blew it by picking music no one likes. She can’t sing, it’s all auto-tuned anyway.” Amy replied. “Put up with the fact that you’ll have to listen to real music, back when you actually had to know how to sing to be famous.”

Linda grabbed the cable connecting the cassette adapter and the MP3 player and pulled, only to hear a sharp twang and a thud. Half of the 8-track contraption was still sticking out of the slot, but the other half was laying on the center console.

“Nice going, sis. You just broke Luke’s 8-track adapter.” Scott said.

“Good. I was tired of classical anyway.” Linda said.

“You don’t get it, do you? You just ruined our only source of decent music because you couldn’t wait a few more hours.” Amy replied.

“Well, we still have the radio.”

“It’s my car, and no, you’re not allowed to touch the radio now that you’ve broken this. We’ll continue on with only the V8 for company. Good job breaking it, hero. Now no one gets to listen to music.” Luke said. He tried to remove the other half of the 8-track adapter from the slot, only to find it was jammed in there.

“Yep, the 8 track player’s gacked and fucked. No more music, because I never bothered fixing the radio antenna. The plan was always to use this, and you’ve broken it.”

“Wait, Luke, you’re saying there’s no music at all?” Linda asked.

Luke turned the radio on, and the only response was static as he turned the tuning knob all the way across the band.

“Yep, you broke it, sis. Unless Luke can un-jam that 8-track thing from the slot, you’ve broken our only source of music.” Scott said.

“Least I can use the MP3 player, then.” Linda said, giving a smirk.

Luke picked up the MP3 player and crushed it, throwing the broken bits of plastic into the back seat. “Go right ahead. It’s now about as useful as my radio is. Have fun. You know, I understand you didn’t like the choice of music. You chose, because you didn’t like the music, to ruin it for all of us. So now we have no music at all. Enjoy.”

Car Condition:
Transmission condition uncertain, assuming unchanged.
8-track player is jammed, though functional. Could be mucked with to return music, if someone apologizes to the team.

Team Condition:

MRL +3 overall. Bad weather and worse grip led to the downfall of the morale. The loss of the music, however, has brought rage and fury to three of the four members of the team. A vote was passed among three of the four members in Team Twin-Snail. While it’s not possible, at this exact moment in time, all three would vote to leave “the radio breaker” behind. The fourth member of the team was not present for this vote. An alternate plan was thought of, and Linda will simply be ignored for the rest of Day 1 as a result.


#Team ‘Southend Or Bust’
Original Post - Previous Post

The story so far: Three uni students in an Erin Berlose going way beyond the original usage reccomendations of the car. But, the long driving and weird lack of problems is actually making the journey more boring than they expected…

“Tree” moaned James as Seb gently steered the car around the object. “Another one. And another”. His head was leaning against the window. This was getting dull now.
“How can driving a car be this boring?” questioned Seb, clearly showing signs of losing hope in his voice. “I didn’t expect this to be like motorway driving”
“Eh” interjected Martin “I’d say motorways were a lot a duller than this”
“Yeah, but at least there’s more to look at than just trees” Seb repsonded.
“True” said Martin, having hoped to start a conversation. That seemed to have stopped almost immediately.

Silence returned in the car. They were bored.


Seb fiddled with the radio, seeing if they could tune into some whacky pirate radio being broadcast from out here. “Did you ever heard about that Judica-Cordiglia brothers?”
“No?” replied James, analysing the map.
“They were some Italian amateur radio hosts who claimed to have tuned in to some secret Soviet radio transmissions when the space race was happening” said Seb, clearly showing some major interest for this. “They apparently heard distress signals and missions that failed that the USSR covered up”
“I never knew you were into your conspiracies” said Martin, perking up a little bit.
“Oh yeah. There’s tons throughout Spanish colonial history. Some of those are really fun to look into”.
“There must be some creepy stuff out here though, surely” - James joined in - “I mean, I’ve never been into that kind of stuff, but you know what the United States are like. HAARP, DARPA, NORAD…”
“What, that they like their abbreviations?” chuckled Martin.
James smiled. “Well, that too, but they have so much land to use that they build these cool military places out here to test shit”
Seb snorted. “You really know what you’re on about, 'places out here to test shit’” he said, mockingly.
“Oi” said James in retaliation. “Still, I reckon there’s something out here”
Doodoodoo doo doodoodoodoo” sung Martin all of a sudden. The other two stoppped to look at him. “What, it’s the X Files theme”. Still nothing. “You know, ‘I want to believe’? ‘The truth is out there’?”. He clearly wasn’t getting anywhere.

The thought of old TV shows got Seb thinking. Suddenly, a snarky smirk appeared on his face. “You know” he said, slowly, “the rain, the mountains, the lake, the pine trees…” he listed.
James sighed. He knew what was about to happen.
“Doo doodoo, doo doo, dumdum, doo doo doo” - Seb was singing the Twin Peaks theme. Of course he fucking was.
“Seb I did NOT come out here to be reminded that I was named after a character from a TV show my Mum and ALL here friends were addicted to that I’m fairly sure she had a crush on at one point or another” James raged. Martin was pissing himself by this point, as was Seb.

At least they could find ways to entertain themselves on these dull bits of the drive. Well, some of them could.


Day 1, Leg 9

Oh that’s just great! Steady rain, soggy gravel road and wet pavement… This is ridiculous! I’ve secretly decided to go all out on this run, trusting that the tyres will grip and that the car will remain reliable at high RPM’s. The gravel section was a nightmare with poor grip and short gearing conspiring to make my run much more flamboyant than I had planned. The tarmac wasn’t much better but at least I was familiar with how to handle it. Oh man I’m tired of this little, cheap, foreign piece of junk; I should have bought that high kilometre Znopresk Zap instead. Predictably, given my driving flourishes, we were way too fast so hopefully I can reign in my frustration long enough to keep us in the running for a podium finish…

Pierre decided to go full kamikaze on this run and I couldn’t blame him; no stereo equals no distractions! I’m usually all about value when I buy cars but I think this spec version of the Bogliq Kitten is just shit; not collectible, not characterful, just shit! We didn’t die on the slippery gravel, despite Pierre’s best efforts, and we roared our way to the end of the stage arriving much too soon for our projected arrival time. I’m going to come back next year with a luxury off-roader; ground clearance, sweet stereo and no numb-bumitis! Seriously folks, never attempt a long distance drive in a stripped out, FWD, rally special as you’ll end up hating your own mother by the end of it. I seriously cannot wait for this day to end and I can stretch out my legs and neck and get some sleep!


Day 1, Leg 9

Car: No stereo, no sound deadening and no seat padding… Yes these are faults as far as we’re concerned!

Crew: Getting cabin fever due to the Kitten’s rather austere interior! LET ME OUT OF HERE!!! MRL -1 (+5 Total)


Previous PostNext Post

Day 1 Leg 8
Just before departing
Wookiee: No, just follow it. It takes us down the side of this mountain. Then (points on the map) we turn here. After that, this highway heads this way to Deer Pass. Okay?
Toni: Right. I’m so looking forward to this. Sitting in the back with you two driving is torture.
Bill: Are you sure you want to do this?
Toni: For the tenth time, YES. We’ve racked up 140 Miles so far, and I haven’t done my fair share.

Half way to Deer Pass
Bill: I’m beginning to think I should have done something about that bearing. It might get worse, right? What did you say it would have cost?
Toni: Would have been about 50 or so AMU. Not that it matters, this is supposed to be a rust rally isn’t it? We won’t have the time to do anything about it until after this trip is over, so stop worrying. It’ll be fine. The brakes might need some attention soon, I was getting a bit of pedal fade coming down.
Wookiee: We’re not that far form the next stop, should be there in about 20 minutes.

Pulling in to Deer Pass
*Bill: There they are. On the right. See if you can get spot out of the mud.
Toni: Duh!
Bill: I’m going to see if there’s a place to get a decent hot chocolate here, and maybe some air freshener… (looks at Wookiee) or deodorant.
Toni: I’ll grab the camera, see if I can snap some pics of the other teams, just for posterity.
Wookiee: And, I’m going to find me a tree.

Day 1 Leg 9
Toni: Just so you know Bill, we are not listening to “The Carpenters Greatest Hits, again… ever.”
Bill: Homer J. Simpson likes their music. Plus, My van. My entry fee.
Toni: My hammer.
Bill: Well, how about Elton John? I’ve got some Robert Palmer somewhere.
Toni: Whatever. (Turns the key, starter motor solenoid doesn’t throw). My hammer.
-------plus 5 mins----------------
Bill: I’m over hearing that bearing.
Toni: The bearing is fine.
Bill: Then why is it getting louder?
Toni: The bearing is fine! This downhill mud run is getting boring, though. (Stifles a yawn) Can’t wait until we hit a paved road again.
Bill: Tie Rod. Back Window. Rear lens. Bearing. Starter.
Wookiee: Jelly baby?
Toni: What?
Bill: I didn’t see…AGAIN?!
Wookiee: Jeez, Snappy much?

A quick thank you @DeusExMackia for making me play that music (note: sarcasm is free)


@stm316 Can confirm that I very much approve of your choice of soundtrack :smiley:


FYI: Typing “Jelly baby” in a YouTube search tends to reveal just how macabre some people really are.



Marc: (YAWN)

Blake: Knock that shit out, it’s (YAWN) contagious!

Marc: That rain’s a bit steady now isn’t it?

Blake: Yeah, I’m watching some of those other cars slipping around a bit in the mud.

Marc: You seem relatively calm about that.

Blake: One thing I will concede about getting a more modern car, modern brakes.

Marc: And yet you’ve got the Traction Control off.

Blake: Relax, I can handle weather like this. Besides, Petoskey has the right idea making all their stability and traction control shit controllable by a toggle switch. No cycling the key, no pressing the pedals in a certain pattern, just on and off.

Marc: (Looks down at map) Looks like we’re gonna hit pavement soon, And the community of Niles. Maybe they’ll have the parts we need.

Blake: Don’t count on it, places like that are mainly tourist traps, not likely to find an auto parts store or a junkyard. Though we can keep our fingers crossed.

Marc: (YAWN)

Blake: What did I just (YAWN) say?


That was ever so slightly my inspiration


Day 1 Leg 10 Data

Niles to Hainsey via multiple local roads

The event organizers had a little something special planned as far as a paved section. Meandering back and forth between farms and rural roads (some not entirely paved), the course stretches what should be a few-mile jaunt through agricultural land into almost thirty miles, all at low speed with relatively frequent stops. Despite the roads being paved, however, they are in terrible condition.

The rain has stopped, and the clouds are turning white again.

Length 28; Avg Grade 0; Max Grade 2

LAE Exact; MRL 0; Notes: Team is getting tired, but very confident in their run so far.

LAE Medium (fast); MRL 0; Notes: None.

LAE High (slow); MRL +1; Notes: Lifter tick seems to be getting worse. Oil level is still full.

LAE High (fast); MRL -1; Notes: No music, road fatigue. At least it’s not raining anymore.

LAE High (slow); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is getting a little worse.

LAE High (slow); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is getting worse.

LAE High (slow); MRL -1; Notes: Team is getting quite tired.

LAE Medium (slow); MRL -1; Notes: Team is getting quite tired.

LAE High (slow); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is starting to set in.

LAE High (fast); MRL -1; Notes: Road fatigue is getting worse.

LAE Medium (slow); MRL -1; Notes: Team is getting quite tired.

LAE - Exact; MRL 0; Notes: Getting tired, but feeling confident.

LAE - High (slow); MRL -2; Notes: Team is getting tired, and to compound things, the brakes aren’t working well, and very soft feeling.

LAE - High (fast); MRL 0; Notes; Team is tired, but confident.

LAE Low (fast); MRL +2; Notes: Able to go fast on this stretch and make up a lot of time.

LAE Exact; MRL 0; Notes: Actually ran this leg a little fast, but also the only team to pull over in Hainsey to fuel up.

@titleguy1 / @ramthecowy
LAE High (fast); MRL 0; The van handled this section well, also kept fatigue progression to a minimum.


#Team ‘Southend Or Bust’
Original Post - Previous Post

Sit Down by James came on the playlist again, and James himself sighed. “We’re running out of music folks” he said as he paused the song and a dull quiet came over the car. The three of them were bored, and this section of the road was only making it worse. Save for the occasional jolt as they went over a big pot hole, nothing was happening.


Time passed, slowly. Seb guided the car round another catastrophic gouge out of the road surface. It didn’t even interest him anymore.
James suddenly spoke up. “I could kill to make a stir fry right now” he said.
“Yeah?” replied Martin. “Your stir fries are good, to be honest”.
“Did you ever use my method on your ex?” James replied.
Martin’s face shot round to look at him, very confused. “Excuse me?”
James was now also confused at Martin’s lack of comprehension. “My method” he asked again.

Then it clicked - “Oh, wait, no, my stir fry method”
Martin finally got it “Oh, ha!” he chuckled, “Yeah, it worked pretty darn well once or twice” he said with smirk on his face. And then the dull quiet returned. James swung back round to face the front and be navigator, and Martin went back to looking out of the window. Silence.


Thankfully, as of yet, there were no tensions between the three of them, but each of them was worried that that something would come up to cause disagreement.

Martin was sure it would be a mechanical problem. He passion for cars was also a bane to him sometimes; he couldn’t fucking stop thinking about them. And on these quiet, boring stretches, every little sound the car made was amplified, and every little sound could be another problem waiting to happen.

James thought he might suddenly get annoyed at the other two, and he was predicting it could be this evening with Martin’s irrational dislike for camping. He knew he had to keep the other two happy with his cooking; it did help to bring a sense of familiarity out here after all. But would that really be enough?

Seb was concerned that the boredom he was experience was going to cause him to snap. He was known for getting angry every so often, though so far he hadn’t. But he was sure that something would come up that would make him rage or say something stupid, and that it wouldn’t end well.

All of them knew it, but none wanted to talk about it; their friendship was risking being strained.


Day 1, Leg 10

Having looked over the notes for this leg, I’ve decided to match Pierre’s pace and show everyone what the Kitten’s capable of. The rain has stopped so the tight, twisty course is easy to navigate and easy to spot the many potholes. The l’il Bogliq performs faultlessly, scrabbling from corner to corner, sliding the rear around the bends and generally doing all I ask of it. Being in the driver’s seat mollifies my fatigue rage somewhat but I can feel the deeper fatigue beginning to set in. My eyes are feeling tired and strained and I’m almost too slow with course corrections; the sliding rear end isn’t always part of the plan! No joy was felt at the end of the run despite making good time. Hopefully the next run won’t be so taxing…

I’m seriously thinking about letting Andrew drive until the end of day one. I’m feeling my age right about now and I want a warm cup of cocoa and a comfy armchair so I can watch the evening news in comfort. The countryside is interesting to look at but I’m past caring; travel fatigue has me feeling number than a shot of novocaine! The Kitten performs flawlessly and puts on a show for the gathered spectators; you can feel the ghost of the Bogliq factory backed rally team, desperate for WRC glory, in the way the little hatch flies around the course. However, not unlike the Bogliq rally team, we were unable to to make up enough time and are left short of our intended target for the day. Not because of the hardware, mind you, but the software just cannot handle the pace…


Day 1, Leg 10

Car: 100% health and getting used the way the factory intended it to be used! (No stereo though, BOO!!!)

Crew: Really tired, we want to go home! MRL -1 (+4 Total)


Team Twin-Snail

Day 1, Leg 9

Before the Stage

An icy silence could be felt from Team Twin-Snail as they packed their supplies into the car. Linda sat in the back seat while everyone else packed up food, finished topping up fluids, and checking for leaks in unusual places.

“Thanks for helping, Linda.” Amy said with an icy tone. “Broke our radio and then sits in the car while everyone else is finding something to do.”

Scott and Luke got into the car, then headed out to the starting line. As they waited at the starting line, Scott leaned forward and hit the switch to drop the top. The electric motor whined quietly as the top folded away, and the rear cover clicked into place again.

Day 1, Leg 10

Luke started off on the road, letting Amy navigate while they blasted down the old backroads, the only sound in the car being the growling of the engine. They noticed a few people had lined up to watch, which made sense as, with all the zig-zagging roads, word would spread quickly about there being some sort of race going on.

He weaved around potholes, trying to keep the speed up as the silence in the car grew deafening.

“I said I’m sorry.” Linda said, trying to break the silence.

“I said I don’t care.” Amy replied. “You trashed the radio out of spite. There’s headphones in the trunk, you’ve got a cell phone, you could have listened to your music and not bothered anyone else. Instead, you ruined it for everyone here. We’ve still got another day to go, and no music to go with it.”

They kept their fast pace to Hainsey, where Luke parked the car.

Day 1, Leg 10 Aftermath

Once they’d parked the car, Team Twin-Snail went about the usual process by now of checking the transmission for leaks, topping up fluids that needed topping up, and in the case of Scott, working with Luke to try to restore some radio functionality, even if it was minimal.

“I’ve got an idea.” Luke said, before grabbing for the rat’s nest of wires. “We know this part worked. All it’s doing is feeding an analog signal to the 8-track player’s read head. The tape player was working the same way, just with a cassette instead of an 8-track. That half’s fine. If we-”

“If we intercept the signal, feed it straight to the 8-track instead, bypassing the middle-man, we could have sound. It’s tricky, but it might work. It broke off, yes, but it left the important bits in the 8-track player. Let’s pull apart the false cassette and see what we can come up with.” Scott said.

Amy was busy sorting supplies in the trunk while Linda sat in a folding chair not far from the car. “Linda, get off your ass and start helping me with this god-damn grill. You’re the only one here not doing anything right now, you might as well learn how to cook on a grill.”

“We don’t have time for charcoal, though.” Linda said.

“I’m not using charcoal. This car’s got old-school catalytic converters and got driven hard. I stuck some ceramic bricks on top of the converters, should still be hot enough to cook with. Take these tongs, grab the big white block on top of the metal cans, and slide it backwards. Don’t touch them with your hands, they’re stupidly hot.” Amy said, handing over a set of tongs.

Linda reached under the car and removed the two ceramic bricks, setting them in the grill for Amy to use. “Now we’ve got heat for the grill, which means we can cook something, because Scott’s working with Luke on that radio, and he’s going to want something to eat once they’re done playing with the wiring.” Amy said.

“We’re not playing, we’re bypassing the cassette adapter into the 8 track deck.” Scott said.

“I’m not going to pretend to know what the hell you two are up to. All I know is you’re doing something to try making it possible to play music.” Amy replied. “Geez, what reeks?”

“Burning the dust off of my soldering iron so we can make better connections.” Luke said, before they put a bit of heat shrink over the wires and he made the first connection.

“Thought Scott farted for a moment there.” Linda said, trying not to laugh.

“No, but I have to, and I’m being nice and holding it for a bit so that I can let it off away from the car.”

After a couple more wires were spliced together, soldered, and heat-wrapped, Luke took a bit of the old casing and adapted it to fit an audio jack and into the slot, making a flush-mounted audio kit for the car. He then grabbed a spare 3.5mm audio cable and hooked Scott’s phone to the radio, and for the first time in a few hours, the sound of Metallica blared out of the speakers.

Car Condition:

Trans fluid leak is at least not getting any worse. Radio is repaired, though the sound signal is a little lacking in power. Still, it’s music, and while it’s requiring more radio power to make the same volume, it’s working. Fluids are all topped up. Top is retracted, but Luke knows how to put it back up quickly now.

Team Condition:

MRL +3 overall. Feeling better now that there’s music. Currently enjoying bratwurst on a ceramic-heated grill. Glad that the Sinistra’s seats are halfway comfortable, and that Scott has music on his phone.



Marc: That’s unlike you.

Blake: What do you mean?

Marc: You’ve switched the Traction Control back on.

Blake: I’m a little tired to be overconfident, this is wearing me out more than I thought.

Marc: I know the feeling, if we were twenty years younger, we’d be all full of piss and vinegar, ready to tackle anything head on.

Blake: At least the rain is letting up.

Marc: I never did ask, where did you get this car?

Blake: The city of Whitefish Bluffs was selling it. Used to be an administrative vehicle.

Marc: How’d you get it so cheap?

Blake: Name recognition, most people go for the Police Interceptors, completely overlooking the civilian model.

Marc: Well, the radio seems a bit nicer than the Police version.

Blake: Better radio, and a less sporty suspension. Plus, less wear and tear, 100,000 miles isn’t a lot these days, but when you’re talking about a police car, people tend to forget the idle time those things have in addition.

Marc: That explains why these roads are somewhat bearable, it’s really doing a number on my spine.

Blake: Tell me about it, you should’ve taken a lesson from me and stopped growing old.

Marc: Hardy har har!

(Later at the next stop, the team gets gas and takes a bathroom break)

Blake: Let’s see how things are looking under the hood. (Opens hood) Oh great!

Marc: What is it?

Blake: Foil came apart on one of- I mean your burger.

Marc: Dammit!

Blake: Must have been all those bumps.

Marc: Wait, what do you mean my burger?

Blake: Well, I figured since I’m the chef and all.

Marc: Chef? You wrapped a meat patty in foil and stuffed it next to an exhaust manifold, that’s not exactly Michelin Star.

Blake: Okay okay, we’ll split the good one. We’ve got that salad mix in the cooler, we’ll just have extra large salads to balance it out.

Marc: How’s everything else looking?

Blake: She’s got all her fluids, all looks to be in order.

Marc: Then let us proceed, I’ll drive.


Day 1 Leg 11 Data

Hainsey to Hainsey Mountain Campground via Hainsey Mountain Road

Parts of this long, winding road are modestly steep, but due to numerous switchbacks spaced far apart, overall this is not a tough climb. The road has frequent bare rocks, especially once on the ridge climbing to the night-time camp spot, a wide open field just shy of the peak itself. There is a separate marked-off area for teams to check/work on their cars, enough away from the campsite to not be a nuisance.

Patches of blue sky peek out at first, and shortly after arrival at the campground by all remaining teams, the sky clears altogether, and stays that way all night, giving them amazing views of night sky (with very little light pollution)

Length 13; Avg Grade 3; Max Grade 7

LAE High (fast); MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact!

LAE High (fast); MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact!

LAE High (slow); MRL +2; Notes: Survived day one mostly intact. See PM for details.

LAE High (slow); MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact!

LAE Medium (slow); MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact!

LAE High (fast); MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact!

LAE High (fast); MRL +4; Notes: After a liberal application of duct tape to the suspension K-member, it’s time to rest.

LAE Medium (slow); MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact!

LAE Exact; MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact!

LAE Medium (slow); MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact (minus a few fuel injectors)

LAE Low (fast); MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact!

LAE - High (slow); MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact!

LAE - Medium (fast); MRL +2; Notes: Survived day one mostly intact. See PM for details.

LAE - High (slow); MRL +4; Notes; Had to patch a vacuum line coming off the intake manifold, but otherwise intact.

LAE High (fast); MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact-ish.

LAE High (fast); MRL +4; Notes: Survived day one intact!

@titleguy1 / @ramthecowy
LAE High (slow); MRL +4; Survived day one intact!

Day One Results:

stm316 (Exact)
JohnWaldock (fast)
BobLoblaw (fast)
Dorifto_Dorito (slow)
Madrias (slow)
EnryGT5 (fast)
Mikonp7 (slow)
conan (fast)
HighOctaneLove (fast)
Titleguy1/ramthecowy (slow)
Vri404 (fast)
DeusExMackia (slow)
DoctorNarfy (slow)
Leonardo9613 (slow)
Rk38 (slow)
cpufreak101 (slow)

Out: szafirowy1, F17Francesco, 8bs, VicVictory

Overnight Camp

OK, from here on until Saturday evening (PDT), it’s open RP for you guys… Grab a hotdog and a beer, gather round the fire, and relax!