Oh, that is awesome! I totally forgot about that body but I’m really glad someone made something like this. Loving the very 90s choice on the colour too 
@DeusExMackia Thanks, I hope will be able to stand out of the crowd but with some many great hot hatches, I almost feel like I should have stuck with my original idea and submitted the Maesima NR/Exestis which probably has more rally cred. But it was probably a bit too big and coupe like for this round.
Cutest hot-hatch ever 
I hoped I’ll be the only one with this body… oh well 
Looking forward to reviews since this is the only challenge this month I had time to submit…and ever here I clearly did not nail it with being underpower as hell.
@titleguy1 Well that really is a whole new level of photoshop that I’ll inevitably have to try and match at some point! 
@Rk38 I think you were better off going for a smaller vehicle, the NV-X is definitely more supermini and more suited to the competition than my Merna, which I’m now thinking might be a little bit too cheap for its own good.
I really think that car stands out though just for its looks. I’m seriously going to look to it for any inspiration for 90s vehicles from now on, especially when UE4 comes along and I begin remaking all my cars. You’ve done a phenomenal job there!
I fully agree with you, especially since they perfectly fit into both companies’ lore.
I wish I had some skill with photoshop, I’d love to put the A-team next to my entry.
STOP THE PRESSES!!!
This competition has been closed for a while now but I have some very bad news… My workspace was cleaned out yesterday and all my notes on the competitors has gone! 
I will be crunching all the numbers again and I hope to start posting reviews this evening. If I’m lucky I’ll be able to reveal the winner in 2016 (AEST) but I might have to stretch it to 2017 (AEST)… 
Sorry about that but that’s what happens when you need to purge 2016 from your headspace, 
CSR29: My First Hot Hatch
Phase One: Researching the field…
It’s the 30th of November in sunny Brisbane, Australia and I’m looking to goad my parents into buying me my first car. But, unlike most of my senior year, I’m mad into performance cars and I want something that goes fast, looks cool and will get past my Mum and Dad’s lack of enthusiasm for my freshly minted driving skills.
A few years ago my Dad made me a promise to help buy a car for me if I studied hard enough and if I got a job, worked hard and matched them dollar for dollar. This meant that I have just under 20K to spend but my parents want warranty so I have to buy a new car, plus I have to run it myself so I have to be careful of operating costs.
I’m gonna buy me a hot hatch!!!
To help me find the right car for me I select my favourite mag “Mountain Pass” which is co-incidentally running an article on budget cars for under 20K, and begin to read the article…
I would subscribe to a mag called Mountain Pass… Here’s to hoping my own experience throwing budget cars through mountain passes pays off
(Having heaps of power is truly largely irrelevant if you want to keep things legal, hint hint 
)
that sounds like a japanese mag about japs performance cars doing touge to be honest…
or an italian one. both are somewhat stereotypical for it
SOMEWHAT
There are heaps of roads in Aus that rival European and Japanese mountain roads, mainly East side (NSW, Vic, and QLD). They’re tight, twisty, often steep, often really long and most often unprotected. It’s one (small) reason why we have an overlap in the enthusiast demographic. I’m willing to bet HOL has done the roads around Cairns, through the Atherton tablelands. Long technical segments and the rainforest for your runoff… Leave your mother behind 
one of the greatest simple joys of the mountain pass is the heel toe double clutch, you don’t even have to be that fast, you just know if you get it wrong you go off a cliff and then when you do it well you feel like a boss
Power to the People '96 - 20K superheroes!!! Mountain Pass
OK, buckle up ladies and gents, we are about to thrash the entire range of cars available in the class of '96!!!
We will rank 'em all and the winner will be crowned king!!!
How ill we know who the winner is? Simple! The quickest car down the mountain is the winner and, no, it’s not Bathurst but our very own exact replica of the Haruna downhill!!!
Neon: alex: 5:47.24
36 of 36
Well, this is an unsurprising entry, I mean, 3spd manual, 4 barrel carb and less than 1L of capacity! This car has tried “cough, cough” to gain performance by being a two-seater, stripping the radio and only fitting the bare necessities. So the fact that it isn’t slower down the hill is due solely to gravity as the car is barely competent enough to drive in a straight line!
If you’re interested this car only costs $5k all up but, only buy one if you want to lose the few friends you currently have and then understeer into a tree…
Verdict: A car which makes the Yugo look like a sensible, rational choice!
Davinchi: Leonardo: 5:32.27
35 of 36
Coming in at 35th, the Davinchi shows that you can get most of the individual pieces right but when they go together you can still end up with a bag of dicks! We asked for a manual gearbox, they sent us an auto, we asked for a hot hatch, they sent us a hot PINK hatch… I’m assuming no-one actually read what we were asking for, or this is a late April fool’s day joke. It also costs $7100 if you hadn’t moved on yet, ummm what else?
Horrible interior, snap oversteer and uses nearly 10L of 98RON petrol for 45Kw… Avoid at all cost!
Verdict: Don’t buy from a dealer which has “over 20 premium brands” in the one lot, they all suck big salty balls!
Prototype X: jason: 5:31.87
34 of 36
Sounding like something lifted straight out of Speed Racer, the Prototype X reads like a car of the future… If the future was 1976! A tiny 1.1L engine “propels” the X in a determined fashion but is neither sporty or fun. Coupling the 1.1 to 4 spd manual was another un-inspired design choice, which leads me to believe that the builders of Prototype X would be better off waiting until they have their Prototype XI ready for market! Costs $8100, looks like a mouldy, wet shoebox and is only marginally better than using the bus.
Verdict: Not worth the effort to take the test drive.
Petosky Stasera Custom: @BobLoblaw: 5:31.54
33 of 36
Now, this van is why I put up with driving shite-boxes, what a beast! Looking like it should be stopping a war with a brace of mercs on-board, the Custom version of the Starsera is a total badass to look at and the van turns heads wherever it goes… But it isn’t fast down the pass and that is all we here at Mountain Pass care about. Looks awesome but I feel like I’m being followed everywhere I go by the Plod and everyone know when I’m home. Great concept for the macho extrovert but is sure to get your licence checked over daily! Oh yeah, it hauls ass in a straight line, it just hates corners… and old folk!!!
Verdict: You could do worse but if you’re making a new action TV show, we have your signature ride right here!
Storm Knight GS-E: @Madrias: 5:20.06
32 of 36
What?!?! Why’s a perrenial favourite around the Mountain Pass offices doing so low in this list? It’s simple, actually. The GS-E is the kind, gentle stamp collecting member of the Knight family… No turbo, no power and it has the only do-it-yourself gearbox in their entire line-up. But it isn’t a bad car at all, it’s got a sweet, wieldy chassis, uses hardly any fuel and is sharply styled to boot.
But it’s not the sort of car that likes to get hardcore so it languishes at the bottom of our list, not at the bottom of our hearts!
Verdict: A good, safe bet but lacks sparkle, especially compared to the rest of the Knight range.
Dash GTi: @Microwave: 5:13.93
31 of 36
Ahhh… The first hot hatch of the day was this sweet little number. The Dash GTi is a well thought out li’l beast with a peppy engine, sporty yet predictable handling and a nicely presented interior. It also sips the fuel while only costing $15,080 so represents decent buying. Why so low then?
Basically this car presents at this level in the list because it’s a warm, rather than hot, hatch and is a good representation of a sensible choice for someone who wants their daily driver to be fun on the weekends as well. It’s just a little slow and in this company that’s not going to help you in the slightest!
Verdict: Easy on the eye, the pocket and the bowser; the first of many 9/10th cars, beaten by someone juust better!
Stay tuned for part two tomorrow!!! (i’m tired, sorry)
31 more to go??!!! 
I can’t wait for more!!!
Expected that, but… I was playing by the lore. Sure, I could have made a modified trim and basically stuffed the GT-4T’s engine into the GS-E with none of the usual care for making the car usable, but… I just wanted to see how the GS-E held up.
BOO YAH, MY DARK HORSE ISN’T LAST PLACE!
Edit: Oh wait, I didn’t read how we are being graded, see you suckers at 1̶s̶t 2nd place. RM-AWD FOR LIFE
uhh… my car Renolt 5 may not have been crazy enough after all…
it does 5 minutes exactly on Haruna Downhill
Wait, are you basing the buying off the speed or just presenting them in order of how they finished? Coz if I knew you would be factoring actual times into this, I would have sent you my proper R spec trim which would have cost 16 grand, sure, but would have easily destroyed the field.
Your writing is fantastic! Cannot wait for tomorrow, these reviews are brilliant!
FUCK
