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The Car Shopping Round (Round 64): Tears in Heaven




Instead of designing their own engine from scratch the 2004 Campra used an engine based on the motor from a 1993 Ceder Friala SE albeit so loosely based that only the bore and stroke were the same, even the block and head material and valvetrain were different.

The only difference between L and LX trim was the addition of a CD player and the addition of small foglamps in the front fascia and a slightly different rear design. Both trim variants used the same weedy 1.7 engine that puts out a measly 70 bhp.


8030 bucks? Is that allowed? Coz the number of times I kept bumping the sliders so that it fell under the limit… I’m not going to lie, I’ll be a little irritated if this is also one of those close enough is good enough things.


Elt - Last Saturday at 9:17 PM
If that $30 makes the car awesome and it couldn't live without, then it's reet


Oh alright then :joy:


2004 Adenine Asante

Electric power steering? Check.
Stability control and ABS? Check.
Automatic transmission? Check.
The 2004 Adenine Asante. All the tech you need at the price you can afford. Starting at $7920

Drivability: 72 :stuck_out_tongue:


I just love how it starts off with oof


The 2004 Ikkonagashi Box

The iconic model from 2000 has now been facelifted. Of course, the changes are so minimal, it seems just like the brochure images have become higher quality. Look more closely and the new metal hatchback is evident, as is the rear lighting signature.

In 1200B trim, equipped with a cutting edge cast iron, 2 valve per cylinder 1200 cc inline 3 engine, it costs $8,030.
The price doesn’t include colour coded bumpers, but inside occupants can enjoy a CD player, anti-lock brakes, a F1 inspired 5-speed automated manual gearbox and not much else besides.

Performance is extraordinary, with 0-100 happening and a top speed above the speed limits in most countries.

And those stellar numbers don’t come at the cost of economy, with 93 mpg fuel economy possible.

At 30 km/h, in second gear. Combined fuel economy is actually 46 mpg, don’t sue us.


Dang - same pain here :joy:
At least we’ll have that psychologically important “under 8k$”-tag on our sides, I guess…


Same here. I thought 8030 was a nope.


I thought $7150 was fine so left it, yeah I have the toilet bowl injection rather than multipoint, but simplicity right?


$8k was nothing. I found it impossible to get under 45 ET.


I did manage to sneak under that value… But only just.

However, an OHV I3 with MPFI would have made my car too expensive in terms of post-markup price, but not by much.

So how on earth did some of the entries here have MPFI without going over budget at all???


Entries closed!

As of 4 and a bit hours ago but hey sleep

Expect the first set of reviews up in the next couple of hours


As someone that has MPFI, low quality MPFI


nope. i actually have decent quality MPFI. +1 MPFI :stuck_out_tongue:




'Twas a lovely mid-spring morning when our buyer decided to go for a ride into town and stop off at all the dealerships he could find, surprised to see bigger brands such as Znopresk having showrooms in such a country, however much less surprised at the seemingly endless amounts of smaller backstreet dealerships. Most dealers was a quick stop off, a glance through the window and a grab of a brochure before nipping to the next place, eventually heading off back home with the sun setting behind him and a backpack full of paper. The excitement was brewing within him, but sleep was the best course of action before he does some real important decision making.

The next day was nowhere near as nice, the pouring rain adding to the overcast morning and giving him a terrible sense of foreboding. He sat down with a strong cup of coffee and pulled the stack of papers out his bag, dumping them on the table and grabbing the first one off the top, leaning back into his chair as he gives it a quick skim over…

@conan - 2004 Pulo Bibi Sport

Top of the pile, staring him straight in the face was the lively brochure for the Pulo Bibi Sport, a sport car? Off to a great start already! The Bibi Sport featured some interesting styling choices, the front struck a nice balance of schporty and sensible, though the round headlights did stick out compared to the angular vents. The sides featured decals a plenty, which he worried would eventually go south after a few years in the sun, and the back end reminded him of an extremely happy child. All in all, so far so good, reading on things got even better, they’d given it a galvanised monocoque to make sure it’ll last that bit longer. Hell, they even managed to fit 4 full sized seats in there, with a radio / cassette player, fancy electric power steering and ABS as standard features! Despite being a sport model it managed an impressive 7.2L/100km combined, however unlike a sport model it’s 0-62 time of nearly 15s was a bit far off the mark, but maybe the handling would make up for that? Either way, it was a very attractive prospect that had definitely earned it’s place as the founder of the “Keep” pile, despite it being slightly over budget it’d set a good standard to beat.

@abg7 - 2001 LSP LQ1

Next up under the magnifying glass was a funky styled little car with an even funkier looking paint job, hell, even its name was a bit out there, the LAP LQ1. The model was a few years old by this point but he hoped that would just mean lower costs and easier servicing. As with the last car, he was happy to see that a stereo and power steering were both standard features, hell, they even say it’s got a quality AHS steel monocoque and corrosion resistant panels! Even more impressive was the SOHC engine they were advertising, claiming “Superb efficiency” despite not using port injection, it all sounded a little too good to be true, and sadly the asterisk confirmed the suspicion. Actual consumption was a decidedly average 7.5L/100km! More confusing was the 4 speed manual, clearly that must have been one of the cost-cutting measures, and with no mention of ABS anywhere in the brochure he hoped that wasn’t another area where pennies had been saved. Despite this, he decided to add the brochure to the “Keep” pile, assuring himself the advanced chassis and panels would make for a much more worthwhile investment.

@vmo - 2001 Gabatron Prarus 1.2 GL

He took a second to straighten out the stack of brochures, slipping the next one off and giving it a skim over. In stark contrast to the last two, this featured a sleek looking and slightly larger hatchback, he liked the colour but was unsure about the slightly large looking headlights, however it wasn’t something that immediately put him off. Taking a closer look at the specs, the reassuring words “Radio with cassette deck” graced his eyes, followed closely by claims of power steering and ABS as standard. It was all seeming very sensible, even including a galvanized chassis and corrosion resistant panels, with the claim of being cheap, easy to maintain and reliable to boot! The slightly advanced engine was making some nice promises too, modern port fuel injection and a supposedly flat torque curve piqued his interest even more, coupled to a 5 speed manual and with again average fuel consumption, this was definitely one going on the “Keep” pile.

@LinkLuke - 2003 Turner T85

Onto the next, and a car that screams it’s price much louder than the other cars he’s looked at, the colour coupled with the use of various unpainted pieces of trim and an odd choice of grilles not giving a good look. Undeterred, he soldiered on, frowning slightly as he re-reads the last section, no mention of a radio at all? Well, not like his bike had a radio, and at least it does come with power steering and ABS as standard. The engine was a slight confuser as well, an advanced 850cc motor which he’d read online had forged internals capable of revving to nearly double the standard redline! A common mod seemed to be a hotter cam and a new ECU to help make a peppy engine, but why Turner decided to go this route instead of port fuel injection was enough to make him scratch his head a few times. The final nail in the coffin was the fuel economy, the worst so far at 9.5L/100km with no mention of anything to make up for it. Straight to the bin, with more head scratching as to why Turner didn’t just go port injection. It may have been the cheapest car so far, but the cheapness showed.

@NormanVauxhall - 2001 Znopresk ZZ 1.1 Prima

A sip of coffee was needed to refresh his pallet, a small smile coming across his face as he eyes the next brochure, snatching it for a good read. Znopresk! He expected quality here, and from the looks alone he wasn’t let down, while the plastics made this car look about as cheap as it actually was, the rest of the styling was far from terrible, such a happy looking car, so adorable! A single mirror to save just those few extra pennies. It just got better and better, power steering, ABS, 5 seats (5 seats in something this small! Now that’d be a drunk party game to try), a radio with a cassette player and airbags! Surely this couldn’t be within his price range, he thought, even the engine seemed sensible with port fuel injection and special fuel-saving pistons. No surprise then that they’re advertising a whopping 3.7L/100km! Upon closer inspection, an asterisk confirmed that number was a little too good to be true, typical big companies up to their tricks, that’s only if you’re doing 43mph! A clarification under of a combined economy figure of 6.2L/100km was still a very impressive number, securing it’s position in the “Keep” pile. This seemed too good to be true, surely something must be wrong with that car, he thought.

@Madrias - 2004 Sinistra Cinder LC-4

Little did he know that another surprise was waiting for him just underneath, a sedan! From Sinistra no less! The looks had him slightly divided, whilst he did like the relatively aggressive yet sleek, he couldn’t get his mind off the strange headlight design, and the slightly caster-esque look of the wheels compared to the body size. He decided to read on, again disappointed at the lack of a radio as standard, and even more so at the mention of only 4 seats! A double whammy came next, ABS as an option but posh electric power steering as standard? That was enough to put him off despite the sunroof, however his interest was brought back again as soon as the engine was mentioned. A whopping 1.8 litre inline 4 with port fuel injection! Now you’re talking! With mention made to a direct-acting cam helping give the car a flat torque curve, he was starting to warm up up the the Cinder, 14.1s to 62 and a top speed just shy of 100mph, with an impressive economy figure of 7.3L/100km despite using a slightly odd 4 speed manual! This was definitely one he had to check out.

@Lordred - 2004 LHE Li-C FDBE

Grabbing the next slip of paper revealed that we were back to hatchbacks, and a lovely blue one no less. The styling left a little to be desired, the front end reminded him of those “Car front ends drawn as faces” pictures he’d seen on the internet, but with extra lights and a big chin, whilst the sides features a functional-looking strip of plastic, and the rear was plain, a little too plain looking he thought. All was put back on the right track as power steering, a cassette player and even an advanced 5 speed automatic were listed as standard features! Though he was slightly confused about the choice of gearbox, especially when ABS is still an option. A quick check of the engine however was enough to bring him back around, a lightweight 1.5 litre unit with port injection, capable of pushing the car to 62 in 12.9s! However, fuel economy clearly suffered thanks to the choices made by LHE, as the Li-C Mk 2 only manages a slightly disappointing 8.6L/100km. Well, the sound of an automatic could be an interesting prospect, so it earns it’s place in the “Keep” pile.

@VicVictory - 2002 Townsend Tango SE

Another sip of coffee and it was swiftly onto the next, more blue! But that’s about where the similarities stop, the styling of the Tango just felt strange to him, like a small car got draped and deformed to fit this much bigger 5 door form. Bigger girls can tango, but it takes some effort, he was hoping what the Tango lacked in looks it could make up for elsewhere. And he wasn’t proved wrong, the engineers taking the sensible approach of fitting a radio with cassette player, power steering and ABS in the standard package, they were even advertising advanced ventilated front disk brakes! Even the engine seemed impressive albeit slightly mismatched, a 1.3 litre inline 4 with a single overhead camshaft producing a whopping 74hp, making it the most powerful car he’d looked at so far, however no mention of port injection had him slightly worried, what sacrifices did Townsend make to get those numbers? A short look further down sealed the car’s fate and doomed it to the bin pile, despite having the power advantage over the Li-C, it was just as quick to 62 but barely managed a dismal 9.8L/100km, perhaps Townsend would have been better served with port injection instead of a more complex valvetrain. However, into the bin it had to go.

@Sillyducky - 2004 Fahrzeug VI Classic

It’s a van! Why’d he pick up a van brochure? Oh yeah, hauling stuff, everyone wants stuff moving around! And it’s a bit of an odd looking van at that, a very big and very empty bonnet but there’s some nice plastic trims running down the side and the back is a bit on the boring and uninspired side. It’s also tall. Very tall, hmm. Ah well, onwards with mild concern of rolling over, despite it’s size it only seems to come with 4 seats (slightly odd) but does feature a radio with cassette deck and advanced electric power steering as standard, however with ABS as an option on a van this tall that could make for some hair-raising moments. The engine seemed more suitable, though he had doubts about how smooth a 1.5 litre inline 3 could be, though it did feature an advanced block to cut down on weight, along with fuel-saving pistons and port injection, giving out a nice 64hp and a nice 110Nm of torque that comes on relatively early. Surprisingly the Fahrzeug manages an impressive 7.9L/100km for it’s size, and promises a good load capacity too. Definitely one to check out, as the brochure is swiftly placed on the “Keep” pile.

@undercoverhardwarema - 2004 G-120 Eco

Ah god what am I looking at?! Is it angry at me? Is it…Well, I dunno what it is, but I sure as hell don’t like it and I think that feeling is pretty mutual. He decided to read on regardless, whilst this was by far the cheapest car he’d looked at, but like the Turner it suffered from it, with only power steering being standard, a radio and ABS were both optional extras. The engine was a surprisingly complicated affair for the price tag as well, a 1 litre inline 3 producing a not terrible 66hp thanks to it’s single overhead camshaft, however again this had come at the sacrifice of cutting port injection, meaning the G-120, despite the name, only manages a very poor 9.3L/100km which seals it’s fate to the bin pile.

The next set of reviews coming soon™



@goblin95 - 2001 Kasai Maru E

He downed the rest of his cup in the hopes that’d help him get the looks of the last car out his head, sighing and grabbing another off the pile, a sigh of relief escaping him as he’s greeted by a blightly coloured and happy looking 5 door hatchback. Now this looks like it would fit right in! It’s so cheap, but it doesn’t try and hide it, because it’s happy to be cheap, and it’s big bug-eyed headlights are happy to see the world! He eagerly skimmed further down the page, 4 seats (with an asterix? Interesting), an interior being touted as quality for it’s price range, a radio with cassette player and electric power steering all as standard, however optional ABS had him put off slightly. The engine was another interesting piece, a turbocharger at this price point! Helping the little 1 litre inline 3 produce a healthy 62hp, not the most powerful however it’s an extra thing to go wrong, hopefully Kasai went and tuned it to be as economical as it could be, they do say it gets great mileage after all. However a slight read down his smile does a 180° turn, not sure what the marketing department were smoking but 9.8L/100km is not what he’d call anywhere near great mileage, coupled with the mediocre performance he sadly had to send the Maru to the bin, a car that could have been made great again with a different engine.

@CadillacDave - 2002 Kelet Asia 660

…Hold on, this car seems a bit familiar. He studied the photos a little bit closer, the car was clearly British because of the gloomy photos, but yes! It looks like a replica of the car from “Funny special British man”! It was an iconic classic, slightly confusing that it was exclusive to asia. He shrugged and decided to move on, maybe he could own a classic without all the troubles they usually come with. He felt slightly assured when he saw them touting a galvanised monocoque and corrosion resistant panels, a modern classic that should last, even better! More surprises awaited him further down the page, 5 seats? How the hell do you fit 5 people in there, surely it must be cramped. But things just kept getting better, a radio with cassette player, ABS and even speed sensitive power steering were all standard features, it could even reach an average 7.8L/100km despite being loaded with so much tech! He was studying hard for a downside, and sadly he found it in the form of an engine, a tiny 660cc motor reminiscent of a motorbike engine had the task of lugging this thing around, and with only 33hp he seriously doubted if it was up to the task. Still, for a below average price, the promise of all that tech was too tempting to pass up, into the “Keep” pile it went… For a second, before he grabbed it to have a look at some footer text he missed, “Comes with a free teddy”?
Securely into the keep pile it went once more.

@Jaimz - 2004 FM Street '55

And from one modern classic onto a next, however this one wasn’t a show clone, and came in a very interesting colour of paint that instantly caught his eye. It had the styling cues of a classic, however wouldn’t look completely out of place in modern traffic, maybe thanks to it’s size. A short read further gave him some more good news, a galvanised chassis and corrosion resistant panels means this should stand up to time much better than a classic, they even advertise disk brakes all around as standard, this thing must stop in a hurry! They even managed to fit 4 seats in, along with a radio / cassette player and power steering as standard features, however ABS was listed as an option which coupled with the brakes brought a small amount of confusion. The engine was finally under the spotlight, and unlike the Kelet before it this had a much more sensible engine, a 1.4 litre producing 62hp and featuring port fuel injection, hopefully an efficient motor! Or maybe not entirely, despite the advanced fuel injection and fuel saving pistons the FM Street only manages a weaker-than-most 8.6L/100km. He decided it wasn’t the night for the FM Street, sending it off to the bin pile. It’s not pushing new grounds and the economy isn’t there to make up for it, and disk brakes with no ABS sounds like an interesting prospect to say the least.

@Grandea - 2003 MOOT Tora ez-go Turbo SPORT

More vans! A turbo sport van this time too, ooooooo how posh! It doesn’t look half bad either, definitely on the dated end of the spectrum but not awfully so. The sides look very van-like, the black paint does a good job of making the bits of plastic look less obvious, and around the bac-HOLY SHIT, this must have been modified for a car show or something because that exhaust is nearly as big as the tyres! He was getting a little giddy at this point, turbo sport van, big exhaust, this has to be good, right? …Right? Well, it’s got 4 seats again and comes with a cassette player as standard! Aaaaand that’s it, no power steering on a nearly 1 tonne van, no ABS yet again. But hey it’s a turbo sport so surely it’s got no power steering because that makes it more turbo sporty! Well the turbocharged 1 litre inline 3 only manages 59hp and a weak 88Nm of torque at unspecified revs making it slower to 62 than most at a distinctly ‘eh’ 15.5s, whilst just scraping through with a dysmal 10L/100km. Hell it can’t even carry as much as the Fahrzeug could, sadly the turbo sport dream was not real, and for $30 over budget with no real benefits, into the bin it must go.

@strop - 2001 MM Scatola Scatenato


@bastormonger - 2001 Pradaj Shiva

…Ahem, back to our regularly scheduled programming, although this time not so regular again, we’ve got an aggressively styled coupe on here! Now this is interesting and a bit more like it, who says you should have a hatchback just because you don’t have much money? Though the front does look a little bit, uh, sad and conflicted, and the sides a bit plain, and the rear a bit empty too but look at that cute little twin tip exhaust poking out there, adorable. Alright so the styling isn’t exactly top notch, but hey everything else doesn’t seem too bad, 4 seats with a cassette player, electric power steering and ABS all as standard which is a very nice change of pace, though surely somewhere must have suffered to fit this all into such a low price. The engine didn’t seem terrible either, a 1.7 litre inline 4 with a single overhead camshaft, and even port injection! 75hp wasn’t a terrible number and it produced a healthy 128Nm of torque too, giving the Pradaj an impressive 7.9L/100km despite it’s size and weight! This had to go into the “Keep” pile, it all just seemed too good to be true.

@Puffster - 2001 ABR Coyote RC 1500T

A sports car? Surely this can’t be right, how’d they manage to get this thing so cheap? It’s even rear engined and rear wheel drive, a proper sports car! Anyway, onto the styling, it looks worried. Should I be worried too? Is something going on here with those schporty low profile tyres and 16 inch rims you’re showing off? The sides look, uh, uncannily smooth, lets hope that’s a printing mistake, whilst the back is squinting. What’s got you so riled up mr car? You’re worried and angry, did somebody hurt you? No, clearly it wants to hurt me, there’s 4 seats but that’s where the luxuries stop, radio, power steering and ABS are all optional extras, and that insane 121hp turbocharged inline 4, whilst the second fastest car out here at just under 8s to 62, isn’t the most economical at just 9.8L/100km. Who cares, rear engine, rear wheel drive, lots of power, of course he’s gonna at least drive it!

@Mythrin - 2004 Pyon Campra 1.7 LX

Well, back to the mundane again. This time a mini-minivan, with better looks than a few of the cars he’s looked at, but the front is a bit squinty again, it thinks you’re up to something but it doesn’t quite know what. Some nice plastic strips running down the sides add a nice touch and don’t look too cheap, and the rear is about what you’d expect a mini-minivan to look like, though maybe a bit more rugged and off-road than the rest of the car probably is. Hell, you could stick a spare wheel on the back, jack the suspension way up and have something that looks the part. A short read down and they’re touting seating for 5, along with a CD player as standard! But oh no, both power steering and ABS are optional extras, and a 1 tonne mini-minivan with no power steering isn’t going to be the easiest to manoeuvrer. Further adding to the disappointment was the economy, coming in at 9.5L/100km it was on the upper end of the scale, despite there being vans capable of carrying more on less fuel! It was a bit of a tough decision, but in the end he didn’t need a mini-minivan with this many seats and worse van potential than the other vans he’d looked at, so sadly the Pyon Campra met it’s fate in the bin.

@Mikonp7 - 2002 BurgerFahrzeug MeinMein

Next borchure off the pile, and it’s another sports car, with a rear engine and rear wheel drive! But it was also a good amount cheaper than the last, and with slightly less conflicting styling to boot. Big eyed at the front with some happy little vents, a much more interesting and functional side, and a rear that doesn’t look like it’s trying to figure your motives out. It’s even got vents on the boot because powah and a roof lip because powah? Either way, onwards the reading must go and on it did, to a surprising layout of 5 seats, radio with CD player, power steering and ABS all as standard! Now this is how you kit out a sports car, it’s got everything and a V6! Speaking of which, the engine was up next. A very small 1.8 litre litre motor that kicks out an alright 77hp, and lacking port injection, expected really when they’re cramming this many cylinders into such a cheap car. Sadly, he ended up a little baffled as to where exactly that power was going, it was nippy, taking 13.5s to get to 62, but that’s about it. Slower (albeit far better equipped) than the Coyote, even worse economy at an astonishing 10L/100km. Sadly, he couldn’t really see much of a reason to give the car a test drive, he knew he’d never buy it but the promise of a V6 was appealing to at least play with. Ah why the hell not, into the “Keep” pile it went, that engine better be fun or he’ll be mad.

@DeusExMackia - 2002 Alstrena Nedeira 2.0i Deluxia

…A land barge? A ‘premium’ one at that? what’s going on here, this thing is huge, huge enough the steel alone for the body is worth more than $8k. Despite the car being a facelift of a much older model, it doesn’t look terrible, it’s just a generic sedan with some un-generic proportions, seriously this thing is more American sized than he can believe. The sides are plain, and the rear looks a bit angry with it’s angled lights and posh chrome strip, he’d happily daily something that looks like this, just maybe not something this damn big. Onto the meat of things, Alstena fit 5 seats into this thing, and they must be damn roomy considering the space, they also were kind enough to include a radio with a cassette deck and power steering as standard, though sadly ABS is an option. Under the bonnet was a 2 litre inline 4, maybe a bit on the small side for something this big but clearly it must be able to survive on that 94hp rating… And that was it, he couldn’t find a mention of price nor fuel economy anywhere. At all. He pulled his laptop out to have a quick look what he could find online, and instead he found wealths of complaints on forums, engine knock out the factory, a poor quality mechanical injection system, all this supposedly in a car worth over $10k! Those who’d thought to put premium fuel in this thing found that it only managed to return a woeful 14.4L/100km. This was clearly only something Americans could make and try to sell over here, this brochure went off to the side for some special treatment

@ramthecowy - 2002 Xin-yundongyuan

Something must be wrong here, wait, never mind, it’s China. From the country that produces everything for a fraction of the cost everywhere else does, comes a supercar-looking-thing for, you guessed it, far far less than a supercar you could get from anywhere else. It looks the part, kinda, the front is very Chinese is a non-racist way, the sides are very empty and the rear looks absolutely terrified, I wonder if I should be too? Well, onto the interesting things, it’s mid engined and apparently even features MacPherson suspension on all four corners, how sporty. Below that things get more interesting, 3 seats? Radio, power steering and ABS all options? Well, it’s not like he was ever going to get one of these anyway, he would like something slightly practical. The engine must be interesting, he thought, what can China’s finest offer in such a tight budget? Well, a tiny V8, 1.7 litres of sm0l. However they did manage to give this thing two direct-acting cams, and a carbourettor for all it’s worth, which produces a slightly underwhelming 76hp. Well, it’s good to see something is being done with that power, 0-62 comes in a not completely terrible 11.9s and it’ll supposedly do 112mph, all while drinking a delicious 11.6L/100km. It’s a shitbox with an advanced engine and a dodgy kitkar-tier body that makes it look fast, of course it’s getting driven.

@HighOctaneLove - 2004 Bogliq Seoul

Back to the realms of sensible choices, he’d hoped, and the next brochure was much more like what he was expecting, a lovely Coupe in that disctinctive blue from no-other than Bogliq. The styling was alright, the front a bit empty and plain with some slightly older styling cues going on, the sides had a once again functional looking plastic strip, and an interesting door handle design. The back looked spaced out, it’s all very wide and the strip brake light effect was definitely edging on the side of dated. Things carried on slightly as expected, 4 seats, however only a radio with cassette deck comes as standard, both ABS and power steering were options, but hey less to go wrong and better economy, right? Well, Bogliq went and fitted the Seoul with a 1.5 litre inline 4, producing an alright 62hp and yet again featuring single point injection, this coupled with a 4 speed manual meant that 62mph came in a relaxed 20s whilst fuel economy was a below average 8.3L/100km. This left him a little confused, it wasn’t cheaper, more efficient, quicker, better specced or, well, much better than any of the other vehicles he’d looked at already. The nagging feeling was that the emissions-optimised pistons and single point injection were to blame, maybe if Bogliq went for fuel efficient pistons and port injection they could have had a contender. Sadly, he had to let the blue, see the bin.

@JohnWaldock - 2004 ZAF Surena 1300

He shook his head and gave his forehead a short massage before moving onto the next brochure, a slightly more dated looking sedan from ZAF. The styling was, safe, generic, boring and screamed “I’ve been facelifted enough let me die already”, the sides and rear epsecially screamed the same, minimal badging, and even a stealth exhaust. Eh, could be worse. Well, they’d thought to give it corrosion resistant panels so there’s one plus already, inside they’d managed to cram 5 seats and were offering a radio with cassette deck and power steering as standard features, however once again ABS was listed as an option. The engine seemed like a familiar-yet-different experience, 1.4 litre inline 4 producing a low(?) 52hp, what’s up there, surely this much be an economy tuned engine in that case. Well, it was fitted with single point injection so just whats going on here? Well not economy that’s for damn sure, barely managing an ‘ech’ 9.3L/100km, but hey it’ll do 88mph so maybe we’ll see some real shit when, or if, it gets there! Another car let down by it’s engine, port injection would have helped the Surena massively, granted they could offset the cost. Well, maybe it’ll hit 88mph in the bin, you never know who’s driving those wagons nowadays.

@thecarlover - 2004 NCPVersatile Sport

Oof, now this is a lively looking brochure, with an even livelier looking little green mini-minivan, can NCP do right what Pyon did wrong? Well, already the styling is off to a solid start, the front end looks functional but it’s trying to live up to that “Schport” they slapped in the title (Which is obviously not going to be very true, come on now), tasteful strips, everything looks like it flows and it’s even got fog lights, score. The sides are adorned with some nice plastic bumper strip stuff and a very tasteful decal, really gotta live up to that sport title, eh? The rear is a bit of a different affair, a bit more empty but it doesn’t feel too bad, just like a generic mini-minivan boot with… Hold on… Is that a spoiler? You aren’t kidding anyone here, NCP, that exhaust is screaming the opposite of what that lip is trying to imply. Anyway, moving on, like the Pyon, the Versatile Sport seats 5 and comes with a radio with a CD player as standard, with power steering and ABS all as options. Why? I dunno, moving onto the engine we see something even more surprising, this hardly insignificant looking machine is powered by a 1.2 litre inline 4 producing a slightly pitiful 58hp. 58, in something that is probably nearing a tonne, and it’s got an advanced single overhead cam with single point injection. Fuck. Well they went full damage control and managed to wring out 62mph in just shy of 16s thanks in part to a 5 speed manual, not exactly sport but not the slowest he’s seen. However, unlike the Campra this thing manages a much more respectable 8.4L/100km, not great, more on the not very great side at all, but it’s an improvement! Could he see himself driving this thing daily? They say it’s “Plenty spacious” but then again they called it a sport model too so maybe not the most trust worthy. He debated for a bit and decided that it might as well be worth a test drive, what’s the worst that could happen, he thought, as the brochure hit the “Keep” pile.

@koolkei - 2004 Komodo Kerang

Keeping kind of away from the theme of modern hatchbacks, here’s one with a shilouette that’s straight out the 70’s/80’s and styling so aggressive you’d think you owed it a lot of money for a long time. It looks kinda nice, like thought was put into it and that bullbar will be awesome in rush hour traffic and some, uh, other situations. The sides and rear are a much more simple affair however, the only extra splashes of plasting being a small strip above the lights and the bumper, with a stealth exit exhaust added in for good measure. Komodo had gone a sensible route and fit 4 seats in, alongside a radio with cassette deck, electric power steering and ABS as standard features, nice! That’s probably the most tech this body design has ever seen. Following suit was the engine, a 1.5 litre inline 4 producing a nice 81hp, featuring all the advanced tech like fuel efficient pistons, port fuel injection and apparently an advanced exhaust header, how neat. This resulted in some impressive numbers for such a boxy design, the 5 speed manual helped the car obtain a downright impressive economy figure of 7.2L/100km along with a 0-62 time of under 12s. Looks like something more than 10 years old is sportier than some supposed ‘sport’ models, it’s stealth sport, kinda. But this one was definitely going in the keep pile, far too good to pass up!

@Mr.Computah - 2001 Zhameng Atom Coupe

Hey, it’s another coupe! And this one looks angry, aww bless, it’s like it’s yelling at you but it’s so cyoot you just wanna pinch it’s little cheeks instead! It’s a shame, because that cute-angry look doesn’t really make the transition from front to back very well, the rear it just, well, different. Bad different? Eh, good different? Eh. It’s got me divided and I don’t quite like it. However things seem to get a little better as he reads on, 4 seats, a radio with cassette deck, and ABS as standard, with power steering as an unfortunate option, especially considering 14’’ alloy wheels were standard. The engine was even more interesting than the styling, a 900cc inline 3, producing a healthy 53hp probably partly thanks to some clever design choices and port injection. However, sadly that little engine mustn’t be singing quite right, as the Atom only manages a disappointing 8.4L/100km. Sadly, the little Atom doesn’t really offer much else that he hasn’t already seen, and with it’s lackluster economy and not exactly nippy nature, it’s time to go to that place called the bin. Maybe if Zahmeng had gone with a bigger engine, they’d have been less concerned with power, letting them focus more on economy or even moreso on power.

@EnryGT5 - 2004 AVS AR1 GS-A

Time for another change of pace, this time we’ve got something straight out the 80’s cheap bin, the whole thing is screaming retro loud enough to deafen babies in the next country over, we not worth a facelift at the least, AVS? The rest of the car is a standard affair, with some very out of place rear lights, the fuckers facelifted the ass! Wrong end boys! The rest of the car was distinctly modern, however, featuring fancy tech like an advanced 4 speed automatic, radio with CD player, electric power steering and ABS all as standard, promising an easy and comfortable driving experience. The engine seemed a little cheap, couldn’t fit an inline 4 in there eh? Ah well, the AR1 comes with a 1.3 litre inline 3 featuring… Nothing! Well, nothing interesting bar port injection and a slightly weedy 61hp, but hey that’s more interesting than most cars. Less interesting however is the poor economy of 8.8L/100km, that automatic probably not doing much to help. But with the promise of an easy and comfortable ride, why not at least give it a go? To the “Keep” pile!

@phale - 2004 Adenine Asante

OOooooooooooooo Now (OwO) what’s this? It’s distinctive, that’s for sure, looks like a chubby kid reluctantly having his cheeks fondled then pulled apart by grandma while he fakes a smile to keep his mum happy, you decide which cheeks (weirdos). The theme kinda makes it’s way around, some nice bits of plastic trim on the bottom of the doors help make the sides look more lively and the rear looks a bit like the front but not really like the front, the angles are there but the proportions are different and there’s some nice roundness going on. Kinda not too bad. But it seems like the true party piece of the Asante is inside, 4 seats with an optional radio, but it has electric power steering and every. single. assist. under the damn sun as standard, promising the easiest driving experience around, and it better be amazing. Adenine devided to go with a neat little 1.4 litre inline 4, it’s producing a very good 67hp and features all the tech like fuel efficient pistons and port injection to make sure it’s nice and efficient. And it worked, getting a very impressive 7L/100km combined economy despite all that fancy tech weighing it down. He’d be mad if this thing was going anywhere but the “Keep” pile, this might be one of the more interesting drives despite the ever-growing list of cars he’ll be driving.

@Leonardo9613 - 2004 Ikkonagashi Box

Was this it? Had he finally reached the bottom of the processed carcasses of at least several dead trees? Surely! It was another happy little hatchback in a happy baby blue-esque colour with some plastic going on. Doesn’t look too cheap, doesn’t look to boring or empty, uh, apart from the sides but they aren’t exactly bad either. The rear is somehow just as happy or even happier than the front, it looks wide-eyed with a massive open-mouth smile going on like a little child, why do these small cars keep looking so adorable? Moving inside the brochure reveals a standard affair, with 4 seats, a radio with a CD player and ABS as standard features, power steering being an option. But hey, it’s got some more tricks up it’s sleeve, like vented front disks! OOooooooo, vent-y. The engine is a sensible 1.2 litre inline 3 producing 58hp, not too bad but it’s helped along again by the addition of fuel efficient pistons and port fuel injection so hey this thing must be on the efficient side. Yes! Yes it is, typical marketing wank claiming an insane 93 miles per gallon but who the fuck drives around at like 19mph all day, even traffic isn’t that depressing. Still, it manages a very impressive 6.2L/100km combined, making it joint most efficient car he’s looked at so far, and excusing the lack of power steering. Slightly strange is the addition of a 5 speed sequential gearbox, what the fuck is this doing in an economy car? Who knows, maybe someone sneezed and the squiggle was read as sequential, but hey it should make for an interesting driving experience! One more for the keep pile.

@LordLetto - 2004 Ciliegia Mk 5.5

Haha, nope! There was one last little brochure that he forgot to add into the pile, hiding barely in sight under his bag. Ah well, it’s the last one, one more can’t hurt right? Oh. OH. Well apparently this car is just as disgusted with me, or it’s self, as I am. Just… What is this thing? Was the designer high? Is it some kind of practical joke? God it just looks purely horrified at something, it’s comical. Despite it’s looks they went and gave the thing partial aluminium panelling, there’s a not too disgusted 4 seats inside, radio with cassette deck, fancy electric power steering and ABS all as standard, not too bad. The engine however is on interesting piece, a 1 litre inline 4 featuring variable valve lift and carbourettors, producing a nice 70hp. A simple 4 speed manual makes sure the Ciliegia gets an eh 8.2L/100km, and manages to hit 62 in under 12 and a half seconds. But god those looks just, no. No. That engine could have maybe been more convincing if it was in something else and maybe had a bit more displacement behind it, but it just sounds like an expensive disaster waiting to happen if anything did go wrong. The final one for the bin.

With that, he sighed and stretched hard enough that he swore his arms were gonna fall off if he kept it up, giving the bin a quick compact to make sure there’s still some room there, leaving the stack of good brochures on the table, neatening them up and making sure to keep the Alstrena’s not far away. His long-empty cup hits the sink with a clank as he heads off upstairs for some much needed sleep, the next day is going to be a long one.



Worth the bin!


Literally lauging in my chair reading these writeups, loving the sass :heart: Looking forward to the test drives!

On a different note as I’ve been away for some time, are we using any mods or vanilla only for future CSR reference?