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The Painful 80's [UE4] [OPEN THREAD]


I’m surprised that nobody has posted anything here in several months, but I think this thread ought to be revived… with something I cooked up earlier, but recently revised: the third-generation Morton Corsair.

Sandwiched between the wedge-shaped second-gen car and the sleeker, more curvaceous fourth-gen model, the Corsair III debuted in 1985. However, with 225 SAE net horsepower, it was a long way from matching the sheer grunt of the big-block original. Even so, it was decidedly faster than its immediate predecessor, ensuring that it gained a dedicated following among performance-starved American enthusiasts.


A little something that Epoch released in 1987 - the M50 Turbo.

Featuring a mid-mounted DOHC 24valve turbocharged v6, displacing 1796cc and fed through a 2-barrel carb, this engine was good for 108kW @ 6400rpm and 183Nm @ 4500rpm. Full boost (0.7 Bar) wasn’t reached until 4200rpm, meaning that you were either cruising or racing… not much in between. Even without a LSD, the M50 Turbo was able to propel its 1170kg mass to 100km/h in a reasonably sporting 8.5 seconds, and eventually reached a top speed of 195 km/h. Whilst not as “go-kart-esque” as the more commonly known Toyota MR2, the M50 Turbo was a much more plush and practical offering, with comfort rivalling cars twice its price.

(shown above with “Electurbo graphics” nil-cost option, and “E-Sport” front bumper)


This is what happens when a Celica, MR-2, and Saturn SC2 have a love child…


Pretty much what I was aiming for… a “what if Toyota went semi-Lexus with a mid-engined celica instead of the MR2”.

For something on the other end of the spectrum, I give you the 1978 Epoch M30 Augustus 27.

Designed to be Epoch’s “World Car”, the Augustus ended up being a compromise in almost every aspect, with the exception of passenger comfort and safety. The car’s engine, a 2694cc straight-6, put out ‘breath-taking’ 77.5kW (103HP) at 5400rpm. When combined with the 4-speed automatic gearbox, the Augustus 27 could reach 100km/h in just under 13 seconds, and topped out at 158km/h.

Alongside the standard car, was the “sports” model, the Augustus 27 Rex. Based upon the same platform and engine, Epoch’s engineers managed to wring out more power to the tune of 115kW (154HP) at 6100rpm. This improvement was somewhat dampened by the more luxurious and well equipped interior, however performance still improved to demonstrate a 0-100km/h time of 9.6 seconds, with a top speed of 175km/h - better than it had any right to really…

Pricing for the Augustus 27 and Augustus 27 Rex came in at about $2,800 and $3,100 respectively, which, when a Corolla cost about $3700, was probably one of the very few things it had going for it!


Please note: the following vehicle is a bad replica of a bad real-life car. The names have been badly changed to pathetically hide the identities of the guilty.

(Insert Bong-Bong from Law and Order here)

Tymouth Plurismo

Though it had been around since 1979, the Plurismo had been powered by a pathetic Pergo 1.6 liter engine. Designers at Tymouth had enough of their little front wheel drive sports-hatch getting made fun of, and designed their own 2.2 liter motor in house. Feel the 96 horsepower through its disurbingly wide-ratio 4-speed transmission.

(Note: Other than 4th gear, which is too much overdrive, I was able to actually damn near replicate this RL transmission.)

While that was a bit of a help, Tymouth really really wanted to make a statement. Like, "let’s do a front-wheel drive muscle car. But keep the 4-cylinder thing.) A few years later they had…

Meet the Plurismo Buster! Using a new turbocharged version of the previous 2.2 liter and ditching the feedback carb in favor of MPFI, this new hatch was… Still kinda ridiculed, even with a 5-speed with not so insanely long gear spacing. But at least it was faster.

If anyone wants to drive these legendary pieces of shit, let me know and I’ll export a beam file for y’all. Or if anyone wants the .car files.


Let’s see who gets the reference. Pretty easy tbh.


Does the pope shit in the Woods?