Ah, shoot. Nice catch!
It was supposed to be 14:00 like the opening date, but since I didn’t specify earlier I’ll accept until 23:59.
Ah, shoot. Nice catch!
It was supposed to be 14:00 like the opening date, but since I didn’t specify earlier I’ll accept until 23:59.
This is the coolest Schnell Ive ever seen…nice!!
Selling my 2005 Vedette. A few issues here and there over the years, participated in all recalls, maintenance done last year. Still in good shape. 112 000 miles. Call me.
OOC: Did not have time to finish the Interior with the top down, so the look is a bit off unfortunately.
Fowler Rand 211AG Shooting Brake
Gulf Orange, I6, automatic. 193k miles, but these things run forever. Everything works as it should, just changed the oil, could use a coolant flush. Asking $2000 (I won’t take anything less than $1913.52). I could get more for it but I need it gone asap. Wife wants half of everything, so she’ll get half of nothing.
PS: I just moved here from New York. Car currently has proper plates and can be test driven.
5.0 V8, RWD, 5spd auto, alloy wheels. Has four seats, leather interior, CD player, aux plug, and GPS. Roof is automatic. Normal wear and tear for 120k miles. Contact below for inquiries.
This looks like a good investment, the way similar cars have soared in value lately
Waldersee is a German auto manufacturer that’s wholly owned by Arlington Automotive. Which makes it not too different from Opel… Except unlike Opel, Waldersee still hangs with the big boys. The Ritter model line, as seen with this 2007 example, is still meant to compete with Germany’s best premium compacts, with the top trim boasting a massive supercharged straight-six.
Obviously, an actual ‘blower German’ is not in the cards on a $2000 dollar budget (and also is impossible to make before 4.3 comes out in two years), but this thing may well be: The Ritter RK2300. To decipher the alphabet soup for you, R stands for Ritter, and K stands for Kurzheck - or short-tail - the internal naming of the liftback coupe body style. 2300 stands for 2.3 liter, the displacement of the 5-cylinder mill under the hood. An engine shared with stateside Arlington products, the 2.3 has one variable cam, pushes regular 86-AKI gas through its direct injection system, and makes an acceptable 152 hp. It is paired to a smooth 5-speed automatic.
For your $2000, you get Waldersee’s grade-A multilink rear, a full rear seat row that won’t snub your adult friends, 17-inch alloy wheels, gas shocks, classic German premium-coupe proportions… You’re not getting snubbed.
2010 Matterhorn Scout
$2000.00
Nice car that me and my wife have been driving for the past 10 years, deciding to sell it since both of our kids recently graduated, and we think it is a good idea to move on and get a newer car. The car has been through some fender benders and there is a little bit of interior damage, especially on the rear seats due to our kids. But besides that, the interior is pretty good, it has 5 leather seats and a CD player. Plenty of room for a family, some friends, or activities.
We’ve never had any issues with the engine. It is a 2.5 liter V6 engine with 140 horsepower. Last oil change we got was four months ago, so it might be a good idea to get it change sometime soon. It has 160,000 miles of usage. Specifications for the car are detailed below:
The car will be sold for $2000. NO COMPROMISES!!!
Contact details are below.
Tuesday, April 21, 2020
4:12 PM
Instagram
The fuzzy vertical video started with Tony, standing in his usual Hugo Boss trench coat with his garage in the background; one of the doors was open, with his Audi Q5 visible inside.
“Hey, uh, what’s going on. So, like, you know how we haven’t seen each other for like a month, and uh that’s not very great- well like, we’ve had the Minecraft server and stuff, but now I think I’ve got a way we can actually, like, get together, in person. So see, like, this Monday my dad is gonna have some work done on the lawn, and stuff, and he said it’d be okay before then if we had a little drive in movie. So what I mean is, this Saturday, we’d all set our cars on the west part of the lawn, and uh, like I’d set up a screen on one end- like, here, I’ll show you where.”
(Tony began the long, slow journey around the front of his house, talking as he went to try and keep things interesting)
“But yeah, like we could have a drive in movie, and like, so what we would do is, put a screen on one end of the lot, and then we’d line up all the cars, and so Dad says like, as long as we all stay in our cars, and like, drive slow over the grass so we don’t damage it, uh, yeah, we’d be fine. And uh, so I was thinking we’d do it this Saturday… uh, April 25th, at uh, 6, 6:30. The weather’s supposed to be pretty good then, like all 50 or just over like all day, and uh, no wind… I mean like, we could wait for better weather, but like we don’t know when that’ll be, and, uh I don’t really feel like waiting anymore, to be honest, what about you? …And like also, uh, we’d all be sitting in our cars and stuff, anyway, so like… and we could use this to show off some of our, new cars, 'cause like, we’ve been getting new cars and stuff. (audible breath) We have like, Maddie got that Audi, A3, and we have, uh, Crystal… with that, uh… Volvo… and also Isabel’s been, teasing that uh, thing, and so maybe- (audible breath), maybe we’ll finally find out, uh, what that is…”
(Finally, Tony completed his lengthy trek to the other end of the house where, without the wall of the house as a buffer, the wind swelled and vandalized the already-poor audio quality. As he caught his breath, he turned around his phone’s inward-camera to showcase the field.)
“Yeah. Yeah, uh, this is the field, so, you’d pull off the driveway here, and uh, I’d have the projector on the far end of the field there, uh, the north end. And yeah, so, if you think that’d be a great idea, like, let me know if you’d be coming, and uh, suggest what movie you’d like to watch. And yeah, uh, see you then!”
…
Within about half an hour of Tony’s sending that video out to all his friends, it’d been bombarded with likes and replies; just about every friend of Isabel’s had confirmed that they were attending. After all, it’s not like there had anything else going on. The school’s attempt at online teaching was pathetically easy, and in Isabel’s case there was so little to do at Dad’s repair shop/dealership that he’d reduced her work schedule to just one day a week.
On top of that, over the past month she’d been vague leaving little hints to her friends (by way of social media) that she may have finally gotten a car, and promised to reveal it next time her friend group got together in person. Now that a reunion was finally happening, she felt like she had to show up and fulfill her end.
Of course, she hadn’t actually bought anything yet. What she had done, though, is a lot of research on the car market, and she’d come up with several private listings that showed some promise. Plus, with no one driving during lockdown, the market had skewed strongly in the buyer’s favor, as sellers just couldn’t find anyone that wanted their cars. Now, Covid also meant that there was no way in hell her parents would let her investigate online listings; but she had to at least try and convince them!
…
“No, Honey. I shouldn’t have to explain to you why you can’t go out right now.” Dad shot down the moment she fronted her plans
“Well, yeah, but it’ll all be outside!” Isabel begged futilely, “And I could wear one of those surgical-masks Mom bought-”
“The whole point of the lockdown is to reduce contact between people. So you can go to that movie in my car- with the windows closed the whole time - but no. We can’t go out and meet random people to buy something you don’t need. Besides, you already work at a dealership, why would you need to travel?”
Wait… right, Dad’s dealership. she hadn’t even thought about it while searching. Mostly because all its cars were older or crappier than she’d wanted, although she didn’t dare tell Dad that.
“…but, I don’t think there’s much at it that I can afford-”
“Well just try and ask your boss about it. You might get a cheaper deal.”
“Wait, dad, did you say you’re giving me a dis-”
“Hey, no one said anything about giving you anything. But like you said earlier, it’s a buyers market. He might be desperate to get some of that stuff off the lot.”
She stopped to process the ramifications of this in her head. At first, it seemed like a bit of a disappointment… but the more she thought about it, it was kind of perfect. She knew this group of 13 cars very well from helping maintain them every week, making her effectively the best qualified to compare them empirically. And sure, the cars weren’t as nice as she’d hoped to get… but there are some that she might be able to make work, especially if Dad was gonna be a friendly negotiator. Maybe this wasn’t such a bad thing after all…
“Yeah, okay, on Thursday when I come in, I’ll look them over.”
It’s about a month after the Covid lockdown started, and one of Isabel’s friends is hosting a drive-in movie at his mansion. All of Isabel’s friends are going, and she needs to have a car by then if she’s to go too.
Now, the good thing about Covid lockdown (when considering exclusively from a car-shopper’s perspective) is that, with no one driving, car prices have plummeted for the time being. The bad thing about Covid lockdown is that she can’t really travel to look at for-sale cars; so she’s effectively confined to the 13 cars at her dad’s used-car dealership (where she works).
After the last-minute rush, the amount of submissions has finished at 13:
@mart1n2005
@interior
@BannedByAndroid
@Knugcab
@Odyssey_Fan
@Hilbert
@Ludvig
@karhgath
@DuceTheTruth100
@GassTiresandOil
@SheikhMansour
@Texaslav
@FidleDo
Results will come out gradually over the coming days/weeks. Penalties and coolness scores will be first, as they take the longest, and then the rest of the categories will come out from smallest to largest. The rate at which they come out may vary depending on my real-life circumstances, but to keep up the suspense, I plan to limit releases to one category per day at the quickest.
At the beginning of this challenge, I started the public cool wall with no cars on it; however, in secret, I had actually made and filled a private “helper” cool wall, to help me figure out and codify Isabel’s tastes. The wall was quickly made and not perfect- there are some placements that I don’t fully agree with anymore -but it still proved of great help when placing cool wall and contest submissions.
(The public cool wall is still the “cannon” cool wall, and takes precidence over this one.)
Also, at the beginning of the contest I mentioned an experimental mechanic called “novelties;” kinds of cars that, for reasons unrelated to Isabel’s needs and wants, she just likes, and which would score higher in coolness than it would otherwise deserve. While a few of these types made it to the cool wall, no one ended up actually submitting one as their entry.
A retro hatchback? Ugly and cheap. A convertible hatchback? Novel, but still cheap. A retro and convertible hatchback? Perfection. According to the qualities that govern the cool wall, this type of car should score pretty poorly; yet maybe it’s the association with characters like Barbie, or maybe it’s just because of how darned cute they are, but she is really drawn towards this kind of car, and is inclined to score it quite well.
I tried to with my entry, but I guess I failed at the retro side of things Probably won’t help my coolness lol.
Really wish someone would have submitted a Caterham now, that would have been fun.
God damn it, My plan was a new beetle inspired car too.
If only I had time
Oh no! If I’d known the secret cool wall i could have just made my car as a hatchback and made it even newer like the mirage
Yep missed it. I was going for an old school FJ. Nothing is cooler, no matter the price
Aw man, if I would’ve known this I would’ve sent in a proper 7-seater minivan. I were hoping my offroad 5-seater minivan could score some cool points. None of her friends probably have similar cars, well, maybe she could fit a few people in the trunk.
The moment dad and her pulled into the parking lot, Isabel immediately noticed something different about the shop’s car selection; they were all facing inward, towards the store. Normally, the cars would be pointed out at the street, to attract customers. But today was a rare day where, thanks in part to the active lockdown, there’d be more perspective buyers inside the shop than outside.
Now that she was actually looking at the lot, Isabel was starting to get a bit nervous. “Are you sure I can buy one of these?”
“Hey, don’t look at me.” Dad remarked, “You’ve earned the money, you can spend it on whatever you want.”
Beneath the sarcastic content of his remark, Dad’s tone and body language betrayed a strong sense of pride in what his daughter was preparing to do, and gave her the encouragement she wanted. So she started her car search, by going through each vehicle one by one, inspecting for defects and problems. This was part of her usual duties anyway, to keep the cars in ready-to-sell shape, but today the inspection would be thrice as thorough.
For many of the unrealistic design choices described below, Isabel tried to describe or speculate why the car might’ve acquired such an unrealistic design choice; but I realize that this style might make it unclear why a given choice is deemed unrealistic, or maybe even what the problem(s) was. So if you have any questions about what I penalized or why, don’t hesitate to ask. :D
First, this entry-level-luxury minivan; or well, one of those minivans that pretends to be an offroader. It’s weird to think that this car was pretty prestigious 20 years ago; I mean, to me it just looks like a beached blobfish, but some of the features on it are impressive even for today.
As for what’s wrong with it, well there’s only 1 thing- other than that tacky aftermarket hood scoop, that looks really weird… 2 things, actually, there’s 2 things wrong with it. And the other one is that the front end of the AWD system is broken, making the car effectively RWD. I don’t have the money to fix it, so I’d be running it like that if I bought it, but since cars like this don’t normally run RWD I doubt anything about the car’s design or chassis was built to accommodate it, so…
Yeah, 1 point will do for this one, for the RWD and hood scoop.
Also wait a minute, where’s the plate? I mean, it seems to have the rear plate just fine, but where’s the front one? …ah yeah, the paperwork says we never got one. Darn it, that’s another point off.
This one doesn’t have any plates, this time. One point off, then.
This is the newest car here, I think… yeah, 2012. Looks even newer for 2012 to be honest, that long LED light bar seems out of place on a car of that year. Maybe it’s been modded to look like a later-facelift version? Also, those tires do look unusually thin, given how big the rims are. I don’t think we have tires that size in stock… eh, I’ll give it the benefit of the doubt there.
So I know this car needs its pistons and conrods replaced, since they’re too worn out to handle the stress of higher rpms anymore. I mean, It’s not like I plan to push it that hard, but I still don’t wanna drive around with an engine that has a chance to blow itself every time I screw up a shift. I’ll put 1 point on it.
Other than that, it seems pretty fine; well I mean, the car’s in deplorable condition, and wasn’t really very nice to begin with, but nothing bad enough to have me really worried; well no, actually, there is the traction control that’s not working. In a RWD car like this, TC’s gonna be real important, especially once the snow starts falling again. Actually, wasn’t ESC required by law by the time this car was made? …As of 2012, actually, wow. So this was from the first year to require it standard.
So yeah, in addition to the other 2, that’s 1pt unrealism penalty for no ESC. And that’ll cover my minor suspicions about the lights and rims, too.
Alright, so the only thing I can find weird with this car is the tires; 'cause see, they’re the size of a specialist offroad tire, but they’re still like… road tires. Like you can’t actually take them offroad much. Not that I actually plan to, but still, the old owner would’ve had to order them specially, right?
Though, I don’t think they’re weird enough for a point off though, y’know. And beyond that… Solid axle in the front is quite unusual these days, but makes sense for what this car is… Yeah, I think this car’s fine. No points off for this one.
And now, the most European thing ever, with its European size, and its European scrunched-up face, and its weird European transmission that’s not a manual but not quite an automatic either. I’ll tell you what’s not very European of it though: the front license plate. I’m not seeing one!
But as for mechanics… oh yeah, this is one of the cars with brake problems. The brakes on this one are somewhat worn out, especially the front ones, to the point that they can’t even lock anymore; yeah, I’d prefer to have fully-functional brakes, thank you.
So that works out to 1 point off for the brakes, and 1 point off for the plates.
So I’ve had cars with plates, with no plates, with a plate in the back but not the front, and now here’s a car with a plate in the front, but not in the back. We’ve completed the square! …Oh, wait, no, there is a rear plate, but it’s in the trunk. Weird. But I guess it still technically has it, so no penalty there; I can always just screw it back on.
As for the penalty this car does deserve: this is probably one of the weirdest choices for a “donk” tire setup I’ve ever seen. I mean, come on: 205/70R21!!! These wheels have the width of a Civic, yet are as tall as a skyscraper! I wonder what the specialty shop thought when they got this order from the old owner! I wonder how much this cost…
This high-riser conversion is almost bad enough, I’m considering giving it 2 points just for that. But no, that wouldn’t be fair, since it is the only thing wrong with it. 1 point it is, then.
Ah, the oldest car here; The only one from the 20th century, in fact. Back when they still built SUVs with the expectation you were actually gonna use it for offroading. And hey, looks like the old owner actually might’ve, 'cause it seems to have proper all-terrain tires.
So this was one of the cars with brake problems… yeah, looking at it closer I see why. The rear brakes are way too overpowered compared to the front ones, I mean driving this thing is gonna be like using the handbrake every time I wanna stop.At least it has ABS, but… wait, no hold on, that doesn’t look right… uh… wait, that’s… what the heck? the front tires on this thing are 20mm thinner than the rear tires?
I- …Staggered tires? On a premium SUV? …What-? Why? …OH, actually I think I know why; I bet the old owner used it as a cargo hauler! The bigger wheels are probably to support the extra weight in the back… yeah, and that’s why the rear brakes are so powerful, to account for all the extra weight on them when it’s full.
So alright, the mods make sense, but they’re still mods, and quite major ones. Plus they don’t really serve me in any way, other than to complicate servicing… I think a 2 point unrealism penalty makes the most sense here.
Oh, boy, now I bet this car has a story of some kind.
Starting with the engine… well, right away the pistons need replacing. They have the same wear problem from the Allure. This time it’s not as bad, since the conrods look fine, but it’s still bad enough for a 1pt engine stress penalty.
But the engine gets a bit wonkier than that: for one, I don’t think I’ve ever seen a car this new with Direct-Acting OHC. I mean, it’s a pretty outdated technology for 2010, if I know right. Also, mechanical fuel injection? Meaning the car can’t support traction control? Is this engine from the 70’s or something? …No, like, it has VVL and stuff, the rest of it is modern. I don’t think the engine is out of place enough to make me think it was swapped, but… it’s getting pretty close.
As for the car; the springs are standard-rate springs, instead of normal progressive ones, meaning this car’s effective weight capacity is barely enough to fill all 5 seats with passengers. The transmission only has 4 speeds, which is strangely low for this era… maybe the overdrive gear broke? The brakes are also pretty worn out, they aren’t as strong as they should be and can barely even lock; surprising, given that the front tires are smaller than they would’ve come stock.
And that’s the next thing: this car has a staggered-tire setup not unlike the Lazurus, where the front tires are way smaller than the rear. But I think it’s for a different reason this time, because it also has the drivetrain problem from the Everest, where the AWD system is broken in the front, making the car functionally RWD.
So, here’s my crackpot theory of where this car’s weirdness comes from: the car was in a front-end accident, AWD broke, front tires lost, maybe probably a lot of the other stuff broe there too. The owner is a cheapskate, doesn’t wanna repair it properly, so they cheap out on all the mechanical repairs; cheap springs, cheap brakes, cheap etcetera, and 2 cheap, thin economy tires for the front; thus reducing front grip and making the handling more understeerey like the chassis was designed for.
Okay, I admit that story’s a bit of a reach, but it would also explain why most of the active safety features like airbags won’t work anymore, right?
But whatever happened to it, it’s gonna get a harsh unrealism penalty: 4 points off sounds about right, in addition to the 1pt engine stress
According to it’s documentation, apparently this is classed as a crossover. …I guess I see where its coming from. The car is pretty tall.
What strikes me odd on this is that I have to operate the top manually; I mean, for a car this nice, and of this age, you’d think the top would be automatic, but I guess when the motor broke sometime, they just took it out instead of fixing it. Also, those tires seem abnormally thin for a car this chonky, and for rims that large.
These aren’t really super egregious infractions, though, so I think it only gets the 1 point unrealism.
And here’s what’s probably the most beat up, worn out car on the lot. Like, there are some other worn ones like the Allure and Matterhorn, but this one’s got to be the worst in terms of overall degradation. None of it, again, is so bad to warrant a penalty, but still; this thing is about as low quality as it could get without one. Like, even the brakes are as bad as possible, without being quite bad enough for an unrealism penalty.
Though what is properly broken on this car is the traction control. This is a big problem because this car is a top-trim muscle car, and it has a 300+ torque engine plus RWD. Without TC, it’s way too easy to spin out. I mean, I’ve lost traction just moving it around the parking lot. Part of the problem, too, is that it has standard economy tires on it, which aren’t grippy enough to handle all its power. I guess the old owner didn’t wanna pay for nicer tires when it came time to replace, but… hey, I guess it’s not like I can afford them either.
With that one big problem, I think it’s appropriate to give it 1 point penalty.
I can pretty quickly notice 3 major faults with this sports sedan. Firstly, it has standard springs, which I’m guessing an old owner might’ve added to specialize the car towards sportiness; but these springs are also pretty worn out, so they aren’t even stiff enough to be that sporty any more. Secondly, the car may be marked for 91 RON, but it seems to be able to run as low as 87 RON; pretty poor optimization there.
Also, many of the cars here have some bad brake tunes, but this one’s by far the worst of the group; the front and rear brakes are almost completely identical. Seriously, they’re both 305mm discs, using almost the same amount of force, and separated only by the front ones having one more piston than the rear. The front brakes can’t lock, the rear ones do way too easily.
Those are about the only serious problems I can find, but they alone are serious enough that I think this car has earned a 2 point unrealism penalty.
Straight away, those LED lights are definitely aftermarket. Geez, they look like what you’d find on a brand new Volvo. Those rims also look pretty aftermarket, stuff that fancy was not found stock on cars in the 2000’s. Yeah, this car’s definitely been modded to look newer than it is, and a tad bit sportier too.
As for actual mechanical problems, though… the brake tune is a bit off on this one, with the front brakes pretty overpowered compared to the rear. It’s not too bad I guess, but still not ideal. Oh, and also, it has the standard springs from the Schnell, except these are even softer; biased towards comfort, it looks like. Weirdly, not much different than what the stock progressive springs would’ve been; I guess the old owner only wanted more road feel?
I mean, the visual mods are so over-the-top it’s almost worth 2 points on its own, and I think the springs push it over the edge. 2pts unrealism.
No problems with this one, but that sport engine needs 95 RON to run, and I don’t like the idea of to paying extra for premium gas. 1 point penalty.
So… what’s wrong with this one? I mean, everything looks, fairly normal for a coupe of that era… the suspension seems appropriate, the tires a normal size, the brake tune isn’t perfect but it’s not bad enough to be worth alarm…
This is, kind of unnerving, honestly. I mean, this is the first time today I’ve seen a car that’s… just a car, with no major issues. Like even the Mojave had something to comment on…
It has both plates… the engine is running 91… all the engine parts can handle the stress of high RPMs… heck, it even has a working speed limiter, which is better than most cars here…
…
…i-is there a body in the trunk or something? Like, there can’t just be nothing wrong with it!
W-well, okay fine. No penalty. But I’m keeping my eye on this one. I don’t trust it.
Position | Car | Current Score |
---|---|---|
1 | 2000 Armor Mojave | 0 |
1 | 2007 Waldersee Ritter RK2300 | 0 |
3 | 2005 Fowler Rand 211AG | -1 |
3 | 2005 Regal Vedette | -1 |
3 | 2006 Rosewood Sunbelt V8 | -1 |
3 | 2007 Vaughn Firebolt GTC | -1 |
7 | 2000 Allen Mount Everest Tourer | -2 |
7 | 2008 Courageux Cirrus | -2 |
7 | 1997 Lazurus DTX 3200E | -2 |
7 | 2006 Schnell 1.8 Sport | -2 |
7 | 2006 Stockholm 130CFBSP | -2 |
12 | 2012 Allure Chiroptera | -3 |
13 | 2010 Matterhorn Scout 2.5 | -5 |
Up next: Coolness. With each car’s pitfalls out of the way, let’s head straight into this challenge’s namesake. Which cars does Isabel think will impress her rich friends the most?
What? Did I tune it for 95? Crap, I thought I was going for 91…oh, well.
Had some strict tuning to make for my practically nonexistent budget
Knockoff Thor’s Hammers means my car sort off looks like it rolled of the production line with the Bastion that happens to be in the background. I hope this means more cool wall points.
Though, Isabel could say to her friends that the car was a secret prototype Volvo that was never shown to the public, but that would be a disservice to the fine people who work there.
Hold up, did we pretty much submit direct rivals here?