sorry for no car from me this round. been swamped with family and personal issues and haven’t had the time nor inspiration to make anything.
hopefully for COP3 i’ll be a bit more stable on the submission front, lol
8 Likes
I hope all is well and I hope that things get better for you in the near future!!
4 Likes
me too. i’m grateful for y’all being such a welcoming and kind community, and for helping me get through probably the hardest time in my life. thanks :]
4 Likes
Hang in there man! Idk what you’re going through right now, but I sympathize none the less. Sometimes life just throws a few punches at you 
5 Likes
Round 5 Reviews
The format of today’s listicle will be a little different than our normal random ramblings. With so much going on in the automotive world during the late 80’s and early 90’s, we felt it was important to tackle this particular time period chronologically. And then alphabetically within that order. Because order inception.
1987 EcaMobile Chipleader 4-door (US version)
Even in the boxy days of the 80’s, the EcaMobile Chipleader was viewed by some as an abomination. There was boxy, and then there was “what on God’s green earth is THAT?”
That, my friends, is luxury off-roading, personified. It must have taken the most devout German efficiency mentality to create the Chipleader, and ironically it gained a bit of a brief association with drug dealers just before the turn of the decade. What it also gained were two rather polar reputations; as an unusually comfortable and capable off-roader, and something that just as frequently needed to be dragged off the mountain due to breaking down. Not because they couldn’t handle the terrain, but rather because of sudden computer failures.
A potential collector of a Chipleader might want to look for one with a bad computer. Here’s a little secret; while the computers haven’t been available for a long time, and finding a good one is next to impossible, it’s actually quite possible to repair the bad one with a little Internet know-how. As long as you’re decent with a soldering iron and don’t mind a bodge or two, you can probably revive a Chipleader that’s been languishing.
Then you could take your pick of shocking modern off-roaders by bringing an old luxury beast on the trail, or shocking the local car show by bringing your ex-drug dealer car. Just make sure to dress appropriately.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Motor Sport, Counter Culture - Classics
1988 RCM Atlantic Mosport SV6
In a way, the RCM Atlantic Mosport SV6 belonged in our previous installment. In a way, it could best be described as North America’s answer to the Schnell LX20 wagon, launched in 1986. We did set ourselves some hard and fast era boundaries, so the Atlantic MSV6 is included here instead.
The idea is unmistakable as being a response; it was a similar size, packed a potent punch, and was still available with the all-important 5-speed manual transmission. Yet at the same time it harkened back 20 year prior, when an American (or Canadian, in this case) wagon could be had with a fire-breathing engine under the hood. Thankfully for the world, it didn’t ride like an old iron boat, and the MSV6 came loaded with a wide range of goodies for its occupants, and great (for the time) driver ergonomics.
So with all of that laid out on the table, it came as a shock to many in the motoring press at the time that, despite the Atlantic selling well, the MSV6 could barely move off of dealership lots. What happened, then? It would seem that loyal American Canadian car buyers had for the most part moved on from centering their buying decision on power, and performance car enthusiasts had too many choices either recently launched or soon to be launched (and/or scoffed at the Wrong Wheel Drive), thus the Mosport SV6 was seemingly passed over. Even a highly publicized stock car campaign using the sedan version of the Atlantic didn’t budge the needle.
Perceptions so often change over time, and the once overlooked Atlantic Mosport SV6 is now quite the popular retro semi-performance car. The fact that it’s a wagon is just thumbing its nose at the plethora of coupes and performance sedans that came out in the same era. Perhaps it is the most underrated thing to come out of Canada since poutine.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Classics, Mainstream Culture - Retro Motor Sports
1988 Rowlari Empress Grand Royale 441ci V10
Timeless, classic American luxury. 6 seats. Miles of leather inside. That feeling of driving around on a couch. The '88 Rowlari Empress Grand Royal 441ci V10 (this week’s “longest name” winner) was all this and more.
Let’s face it, no one bought an Empress because they were being practical, pragmatic, frugal, or any of another half dozen or so adjectives. Thanks to repeated CAFE violations and ensuing gas guzzler taxes imposed on their vehicles, the only car on this list that had a higher sticker price would be the Madison Ballista 500GT. You also didn’t buy a Rowlari for its performance, either. 7.2 liters of conservatively tuned pushrod iron ended up being more anemic than the Keystone 4 liter V8 that would come out just two years later. Of course, with a new camshaft and a little ingenuity with the onboard computer, the V8 in the Empress could be a very different beast. And made even more thirsty by such endeavors.
About all we can say is that this seems to be the late 80’s version of rolling coal, before it was cool. So it’s wasn’t exactly a surprise when I saw a trailer queen Empress show up at a recent car show, towed behind a jacked up diesel truck belching all kinds of crap into the air.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1989 Cabrera Pilgrim GT
Now here was the Spanish Inquisition that no one expected. The one where they asked “what if we gave you a really solid car?”
Frankly, it was a question that many North American families were not ready to be asked. After all, for decades the Spanish carmaker had sent their weird takes on various American cars. With the Pilgrim, they took a completely different tack. Moving to a more traditional, simple design (except for the new full-time All-Wheel Drive system they had available), the car set a completely different tone. Heck, it didn’t even have 5 gears in the manual gearbox. 4 is still enough for anyone, right?
That oversight there may have kept them from absolutely running away in sales figures, as some buyers were turned off by a car with a gearbox plucked from the late 70’s. Still, more than enough people didn’t care. The price was right, and so was the package. The Cabrera would go anywhere you wanted it to, even the worst Forest Service or rural roads, and it would come back for more and with gas to spare. The Cabrera Pilgrim GT would not have been anything that an enthusiast would have given the time of day when new.
Nowadays it’s a little different. Pilgrims are sought after, not because of significant performance or classic design, but because of their sheer durability. We did a recent check, and an astonishing 20 percent of all 1989 Pilgrims sold are still registered in the US or Canada today. Thirty two years later. No other car even comes close.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics, Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
1989 IP Celestia GT/TA
If there were hints early in the 80’s as to what was coming, 1989 was the year the doors were kicked open, and the flood of performance cars returning to the market began.
Before, there was a clear distinction between inexpensive, yet fun to drive coupes, and proper sports cars. The '89 IP Celestia GT/TA took that line and blurred it so much the FCC started using it to censor things on TV.
Now, the Celestia wasn’t exactly inexpensive. Its price tag was flirting with the low end of luxury car territory, but its performance was unquestionably in sports car territory. With 305 horses and a 6.3 second 0-60, the only thing keeping it from being called a sports car outright was the pesky detail of having rear seats.
Celestia GT/TA’s still exist in the wild, here and there, mostly showing up now as car shows. The model didn’t have great longevity, and their owners absolutely trashing them did not help in the least. Oh, and if you find one in restorable condition, let me know, alright?
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars
1989 Longley Lightning Speedwagon
One of the premium performance vehicles that followed shortly after RCM’s ill-timed release of the Atlantic MSV6 was the Longley Lightning Speedwagon, just one year later. Performance may have been in the eye of the beholder; the RCM Atlantic was significantly faster off the line than the much longer, heavier Lightning Speedwagon.
Try telling that to motoring “purists”, whose requirements are rear wheel drive and gobs of power. The Lightning filled both of these measures, placing it in the same public category opinion as European sports sedans. Never mind that this was a wagon; Schnell had already set a precedent that the long roof wasn’t a completely dead format yet. As well, being rather leading-edge in technology, the Lightning Speedwagon was one of the first mass-produced cars to be sold in the US with an antilock braking system, albeit a very crude one by today’s standards. The Lightning gave the public a glimmer of hope that Britain hadn’t completely fallen off the map as far as their ability to produce an impressive car, which they then promptly dashed on the rocks with poor driving dynamics and a reputation for being a handful to drive, even in a parking lot.
In the end, Longley probably did as much damage to British automotive reputation in North America as Shidley did a few years prior. That would have ramifications for years to come, and some say was the catalyst for British automakers withdrawing from the US altogether by the end of the millenium.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Counter Culture - Classics
1989 Matsuma SI-Z
Matsuma joined in the performance wars in 1989 as well, though with a car that didn’t even put out 125 horsepower. It didn’t need brain-melting figures to make it fun; the '89 Matsuma SI-Z was built to be an affordable, zesty version of an economy car. History would look back and apply the label of “hot hatch” to it, and truly it was one of the progenitors of the class.
With an 8.8 second 0-60 time, the SI-Z’s performance would be pretty embarassing today. But for an inexpensive, sporty compact in the late 80’s, that was quite respectable. Unlike other competitors, Matsuma didn’t compromise quality or reliability to bring performance, adn the SI-Z was a common sight on the road up until about 10 years ago.
Of course they still exist in the wild, just not in nearly the numbers they used to. A generation that grew up driving “gently” used SI-Z’s in high school are now watching their own children getting their licenses and seeking out the very same cars as a hip retro daily. It’s enough to make a father proud. And also cringe that another rad-era classic is getting chewed up and spit out by a kid who doesn’t truly appreciate what it is.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics, Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1989 Munot Levant GS Turbo
In a time where it seemed that no import could do wrong, Swiss manufacturer Munot tarnished their own image by bringing the Levant GS Turbo roadster to the party. It’s truly one of those cases where one colossally bizarre decision made it through the entire design process, and no one on the committee raised their hand and said “wait, why?” So what sunk what should have been a great model on paper?
210 horsepower, 2.2 liter turbo engine? No, that checks out. 5 speed manual? No, that’s a must-have to go with that engine. All-wheel drive? Eh, not necessary for a roadster, but at least the right wheels are turning. Styling? Checks out. Detachable convertible roo… oh, wait. Yeah, I think we found the problem.
Convertibles had been in decline in the US for nearly 20 years, and Munot brings a ragtop to the table where you have to completely detach and store the roof. That may have been passable in the 60’s on a cheap British roadster, but a high performance, premium model? Potential buyers ran screaming from a car where you couldn’t at least fold down and stow the roof on the go.
If you stumble across one of these at a car show, just know that you’re looking at a truly rare beast over here; fewer than 7000 were sold over the entire model run.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1989 Schnell LX35 LSi
For 1989 Schnell revamped their LX series and upped the ante with a 260HP 3.5L V6. What was before a respectable performance car turned into a bit of a raving lunatic. 6.1 second 0-60 sprint performance and an un-governed 162 MPH top speed gave this version a new performance pedigree. Yet it was derided then, and to an extent even now, for the controversial choice to use a 4-speed manual instead of a 5-speed. While it was acceptable for a budget-conscious Cabrera to do so, it left a sour taste in the mouth of some Schnell fans and prospective buyers.
This hampered sales and left the door open for some competitors, but many still bought the LX35 LSi because they knew what it was. There was also hope for what it could be. In the end, the driving experience offered by the '89 Schnell LX35 LSi has been one of exhilaration and control. One that has been improved upon over the years by aftermarket support and ingenuity of owners.
And in case you hadn’t guessed by now, the most common mod for the LX35? A newer, 5- or 6-speed gearbox. Followed by projector headlights.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Mainstream Culture - RestoMod
1990 Bazard Dakar
One of the most culturally influential yet overlooked genres of cars. The minivan. You love to hate them, even if you drive one and love it. The quintessential minivan of the early 90’s? The Bazard Dakar.
5 permanent seats, and a removable 3rd row of seats to flex between cargo and passenger needs. A peppy 2.9 liter SOHC V6. Solid gas mileage. Parents couldn’t want any more from a car, except something cooler. Now, 30 years later, uncool has a certain cool to it. Low mileage, unmolested Dakars can actually bring a good price. Their enthusiast owners show up at meets dressed in goofy period-correct threads, blasting Milli Vanilli from the tape deck.
Have you noticed how many old Dakars are still on the road, used by everyone from original owners to handyman services? They built 'em well back then, that’s for sure.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics, Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
1990 Boulder Boundary LE
This was the beginning of the end for the station wagon. It wasn’t known at the time, but within 5 years it was crystal clear. Families had a new go-to vehicle: the SUV. The 1990 Boulder Boundary played a big role in that.
The early Boundary models weren’t without controversy. Poor ratings in the federal crash tests raised eyebrows as to whether such a large vehicle should be on the road, and there were allegations that the Boundary could roll over far too easily. It didn’t seem to dissuade buyers; the rugged image of the SUV was matched by its uncanny abilities in poor weather and off-road conditions, and vast cargo space assured families they could take all their luggage and accessories on long vacations.
Now you can get both at once. Buy yourself a clapped-out Boundary, get it running, shove a cooler and sleeping bags in it, and go off on an off-the-pavement rally. No, not the high speed kind of rally. The kind where you meander around, see cool places, pick up trash, and camp out with friends.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Motor Sports, Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
1990 CM Hellhound Z3
The metaphor “wolf in sheep’s clothing” seems mostly appropriate, but what do you call it when the animal is a Hellhound?
Rhetorical question for the sake of a hook. Pseudo-philosophy aside, CM shattered any semblance of “norms” in 1990 when it released a “sports coupe” that really was a full blown sports car with extra seats. Not the tiny jump seats used for dodging tariffs, either. Actual, real seats that could fit (small) adults.
In practice, only the top-trim Z3 had the capabilities granted by its 365HP 4.8 liter V8. Lower trims used more sane engines, and the price and performance difference did steer enough “normies” to those less insane trims, probably saving a few thousand lives on the road in the process. For those who had the means and the skills (or stupidity, as the case may be), the Hellhound Z3 could rocket their butts to 60 in 5.8 seconds and take them all the way to 186 MPH. Only a Madison Ballista was faster.
This car was the ultimate sleeper, as it didn’t look significantly different than a pedestrian base-model Hellhound. Both a blessing and a curse for CM, that detail. Not flashy enough for some people to buy, I guess. A pity, since they’d never known the spleen-crapping joy of not knowing if you’d just made a fatal mistake at 120 on the freeway, where traction control was basically useless. Not that our senior editor knows anything about that.
As one could imagine, insurance companies were not exactly happy about this model, particularly its poor crash test ratings. Insurance premiums soon became a further deterrent to ownership, and sales never again met their launch-year peak. Rates are still sky high, even today. Go price out a sunny day policy on a '90 Hellhound Z3. It’s pretty shocking. Then again, so few are left that if you can afford to score one, insurance isn’t really an issue.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars, Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
F&S Seax GTA
If the CM Hellhound was insanity on wheels, the F&S Seax GTA was Britain’s composed, pragmatic retort. Amongst the plethora of “sports sedans” coming on the market, the Seax GTA stood out as being the only one classified as a compact. A bold move, for sure, since no one really knew if Americans would buy a plush car that small.
The answer was, well, mixed. Buyers in general were starting to shy away from British cars thanks to repeated labor and supply issues with all of the manufacturers and a few high-profile models that were failures. But those who did spring for a Seax GTA were treated to a small sedan with excellent performance and interior fit, as well as finding unexpected extras such as ABS that were otherwise unheard of in such a small form factor.
It is, in fact the British car that possibly has the strongest cult following in the United States. Possibly even stronger than their following in Canada, which is saying a lot.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Counter Culture - Classics
1990 FM HiWay 2200L
We hop from one of the most beloved British cars of the era to one of the most overlooked and underrated, the FM HiWay 2200L. I’ll wait for a second while you try to remember it, then look it up online. Go ahead, I have time.
Took you a minute, didn’t you? Yeah, looking at it there was absolutely nothing special about it, was there? 102 horsepower 4-banger, front wheel drive, mostly sold with a pretty ghastly 3-speed auto with early electronic controls. The HiWay’s success and place in history ended up depending on time and intangibles. Notably, value and predicted reliability. Both of which were surprisingly good for a British car.
That may be why it’s pretty easy to find these in Canada, where both the economic and social climate were much friendlier. In any case, a good number of these are puttering around, so collectors of the quirky and forgotten won’t have a hard time finding one at a reasonable price. And Seax owners clubs usually don’t thumb their noses at anyone tagging along with them in another British car.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics, Counter Culture - Classics
1990 Hinode Tempest GT Turbo
Japan fired their opening shot in the sports sedan wars in 1990 with a little number called the Hinode Tempest GT Turbo.
The very name conjured up images of power and speed, and Hinode did not disappoint. 273 horses on tap (to comply with the "gentlement’s agreement in Japan, of course), three pedals, and of course power going to the correct wheels. Add in sharp styling and the Tempest was a very attractive option for those looking for a performance sedan.
The Tempest was quite quick off the line, with a 5.8 second 0-60. The only thing on the Tempest that was faster than its acceleration, unfortunately, was its oil consumption. For years the 2.5 liter turbo-six would be plagued by all kinds of issues with seals, particularly in the turbo and the valve cover.
These problems, in the long run, ended up being just a mere annoyance, and did not deter people from buying and enjoying their cars for what they could do. That enjoyment just came with the pain of more frequent time in the garage, and ribbing and memery from fans of other models.
Want to see one in action, though? Go check out a drift event, you’re almost guaranteed to see one there.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Counter Culture - Motor Sports
1990 Keystone Q40 Senator
Keystone must have sensed a change in the winds, or at the very least looked at the sales graph of their long-running Q-series bargain sports car, sometime in the mid-80’s. An old, dying series was given brand new life with a clean-sheed redesign in 1990, taking the humble roadster and turning it into a full-blown grand tourer.
Previous Q owners must have been shocked, and at the time, so was the motoring press. They initially couldn’t believe that the luxurious two-seater had the same DNA as the model it replaced. The new 265HP 4 liter, all-aluminum V8 seemed so un-Keystone, yet a breath of fresh air that was desperately needed by the public. The level of opulence offered was also unmatched by any previous Keystone (and only matched by the D-series Senator released the same year). As a result, Q series sales saw a healthy rebound for this generation.
New electronic controls and gadgets, of course, needed to come from somewhere. It seems that Keystone chose a rather unfortunate supplier of these components, and reliability of the interior gadgetry and ABS computer were questionable at best. Although not as bad as the debacle of the flat-out dangerous Longley, Keystone’s misstep here ended up further damaging the reputation of British cars, and put another nail in the coffin of inevitability.
Despite the reputation and headache surrounding the electrical issues, Q40 drivers are often proud of their cars, taking meticulous care of them and hitting up every car show they can.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
12 Likes
1990 Kolt Coyote Mk.3
Welcome to the Island of Misfit Toys, Kolt Coyote. One of the favored sports cars of the previous generation lost a step, and stumbled in the face of competition with its 3rd generation release.
With 260 horsepower and a 7.3 second 0-60, the Coyote wasn’t a poor performer on the street or track. To the contrary, it was a bit faster than the outgoing model. Its performance at the gas pump, however, was absolutely abhorrent, and the model was slapped with a CAFE gas guzzler tax. With a rising price point and severely diminished return, this tax put further strain on the value of the package. In fact, this pushed the price of the Coyote far enough above the similary performing (and far more practical) RCM Atlantic MSV6 to give buyers cause to pause.
Unfortunately for Kolt, sales of their new model were in near free-fall. Adaptation and ingenuity would be necessary for the model to survive.
In the long run, the Coyote turned out to be a relatively reliable, though mostly forgotten, model. There is only a very small following of this model today, and it’s not uncommon to see running examples doing amateur figure 8 racing, being jumped off of berms, or burnouts for the sake of burnouts.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars, Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
1990 Mara Irena 2.0i Freedom Edition
Our runner up for longest model name this week is yet another Maxsim Bricklov turd import special. Using naming that evokes patriotism and freedumbs freedom, he brought in a convertible version of the Mara Irena.
Of course, it is every bit of the ill fitting, wheezy deathtrap that one would expect Bricklov to foist on us lovingly curate for us. So come, my friends. Drop the hammer and try to unleash all 79 horsepower as the wind rushes through your hair. Just… ignore the Geo Metro that just blew your doors off. And the 1978 Keystone C-series that’s giving you a run for your money.
The Irena is a dichotomy of economics and shifting consumer taste. It’s proof that, even if Americans don’t want something, they’ll still buy it if you make it cheap enough. No, the Irena Freedom Edition was not a smashing sales success, not by any measure. But it was not a failure either.
In any case, if you like weird, niche crap, go out and buy three Irenas. You’ll need at least that many to piece together a good body. The engines are pretty reliable, though, so you can keep one as a spare and sell the other to some idiot who wants to throw it in a sand rail or something.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics, Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
1990 Sandhurst Louisianno GLE
I’m not sure if this is being added here more as a personal note or if there’s a broader nostalgic appeal that I’m forgetting. Disclaimer: Mom owned one of these, and it was the car I took my driver’s license test in, and the first car I drove on any regular basis.
Is there anything more oval and blobby than a 90’s compact or mid-sized sedan? Not really. Aerodynamics were the order of the day for squeezing out every mile out of every ounce of fuel, and oval was efficiency chic. So uncool. By that standard, how does a family sedan from the 90’s end up being at least somewhat cool? Don’t leave the 80’s behind entirely. Sandhurst did this with the Louisianno in 1990. It was still pretty upright and boxy, but enough corners were rounded to make it look modern-ish. Not so many that it made it look like a bar of soap.
As for everything else you’re looking for in a sedan? Economy, driving experience, comfort, it’s all there in the Louisianno. It’s not quite like driving a couch, nor is it jarring like an economy car, which is nice because road feel is important.
I used to see these things everywhere. The county had a ton of them in their motor pool. Heck, even the school district had a couple as drivers ed cars. Now they’re all but gone from the road, but I can’t help but smile when I still see one puttering around.
Perhaps nostalgia of a simpler time, before The Adulting happened.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics
1991 Arlington Foxhound SR 348 Disintegrator
Ok, maybe THIS is the longest name of the week. Honestly.
Disintegrator. That was an interesting choice of trim name. Certainly fitting, given how many of them ended up doing so in crashes. See, if there’s one thing the 1991 Arlington Foxhound (SR 348 Disintegrator) is known for, besides being a monstrously powerful 320HP sports coupe, is being a monstrosity to try to control, particularly for drivers with more confidence than skill.
Widowmaker. Crowd control. Unguided missile. The Foxhound has been called all of these, and more. Certainly not without merit. I got a chance to drive one on a track a few years ago. It’s truly a feat for a car to scare the crap out of me, but thats just what this damn thing did. It is FAST, but the line between control and becoming a passenger is razor thin. So yeah, the Foxhound Disintegrator earned every bit of its reputation.
Don’t believe me? Try finding one that’s not at least a LITTLE bit wrecked. I dare you.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars
1991 Hessenburg F-4 1.6T (US Model)
Perhaps Hesseburg took exception to Matsuma trying to muscle in to their market niche in 1989. Perhaps they thought nothing of it, but wanted to make their performance compact able to play with the premium sports sedans of the day. Either case, the Hessenburg F-4 came out in 1991, once again blurring the lines between car categories.
Far too small to be a performance sedan, far too expensive to be a souped up economy hatchback, Hessenburg again invented its own market and blazed a trail. Someone forgot them to take a map and compass with them, however, as that trail led right off a cliff. As much as American buyers were clamoring for performance, there was still too big of a gap in consumer tastes to try to drive this little hatchback wedge into it. Performance car buyers, for the most part, were looking for something bigger and more stately, and budget performance buyers were, well, on a budget. One that couldn’t afford the price tag that put it in the same category as the Hinode Tempest GT Turbo.
Styling, of course, is subjective. The F-4’s styling is definintely polarizing. Especially when presented in “Ogre With Leukemia Green”. It’s hard to say how much that contributed to the failure of the F-4 in the US.
Now if you like shaking things up, that’s EXACTLY what you should take to a cruise-in.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Counter Culture - Classics
1991 Starley Swerve RSi
While Hessenburg was off committing a rare blunder, Starley was showing how one could compete with the Matsuma SI-Z. Enter the 1991 Starley Swerve RSi. A sporty, economical coupe for the youthful masses.
A 0-60 time of 8.3 seconds was really good for an “economy” car of the time, and combined fuel economy of almost 30 miles per gallon was nothing to sneeze at. The Swerve RSi was a very capable, confident machine for its size. Really the only thing anyone ever complained about was the stiff padding in the seats that wore down too quickly.
Now, being British, these just weren’t available in huge numbers like American or Japanese cars. But I do remember seeing a couple of them in the parking lot at high school, and a ton in the campus lots when I went off to college. Then, like everything else British, they just seemed to disappear.
And just like everything else British the seem to just randomly all show up, all at once, at a major car show.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics, Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1992 Angus Screamer Octane Edition
For more than a decade, the Madison Ballista was the undisputed King of American sports cars. Challengers rose and made their mark over the years, but could not usurp the throne. Then, in the twilight of the classic version of the Ballista, another challenger rose in the form of the Angus Screamer Octane Edition.
Over the years, the Ballista had inched more and more upscale, and its price along with it. The Angus Screamer offered something fresh, with a price nearly 10 grand lower than the Ballista. Suspension tuning on the Screamer was far tighter than anything Madison had offered before, and Angus knew that; their marketing campaign posed the Screamer as the complete package. This was compelling to some buyers, mostly those who were used to European sports cars.
For the tastes of red-blooded “All-American” drivers, though, this wasn’t what they were looking for. It was all about hot, nasty speed. Even the outgoing Madison Ballista was faster. The Angus couldn’t compete head to head either with it or the brand new model. Perhaps it didn’t need to. It was a much more striking model to see in person. Something that commanded attention.
I mean, just LOOK at it. Screamer indeed. It looks like it’s screaming down the road, even when sitting still. A little 80’s euphoria that lingered into the 90’s.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars, Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1992 Armor Valencia H33
The inevitable American response to the sports sedan wars came in 1992, in the form of the Armor Valencia H33. Of course, they came in guns blazing, touting scorching speed, and to do it all on a reasonable budget.
5 seconds flat to 60? No problem, the H33 will do that. Room for 5 adults to ride around in style, and loads of creature comfort features for them? Yep, got it. Undercutting the Hinode Tempest by 500 bucks? Yeah, let’s do that too.
Frankly, the Valencia H33 shocked quite a few people in the automotive press who had taken the firm stance that America just couldn’t make a good performance sedan if they tried. Well, not only did they do so, but they put the screws to both Japan and Germany, while just smirking at Britain as they slowly slinked away.
Buyers, frankly, loved it. There were periods where Armor could not build them fast enough. At one point in early 1993, the waitlist was 3 months long. Trying to buy one now, the waitlist may be a bit longer. Seems that people who still own and register them don’t like giving them up. Something about prying the keys from their cold, dead hands.
As an interesting note, there have been several sightings of left-hand drive, US market Valencia H33’s in Japan in recent years. It’s apparently a paperwork nightmare to import over there, but American car enthusiasts in Japan appreciate them as alternatives to the homegrown performance sedans of the era.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Counter Culture - Import/Export
1992 Ivera Phoenix RXT (NA Market Model)
Phoenix seems to be a very fitting same for a model for a company that almost burned itself to ashes once by over-innovating. Over decades of change and trust-building with the pubic, they then became in a position to once again produce a highly innovative model. This time with much better results.
When someone says “European luxury sedan”, the first thing that comes to my mind is the Ivera Phoenix. I know I’m not the only one. First of all, it is a timeless design. Though we all know it’s almost 30 years old, its age doesn’t show. Second, it is an unusual configuration of a Boxer-6 in a luxury car, eschewing the philosophy that more cylinders must be better. Instead, Ivera shows that the right engine is the correct, whatever that may be.
The Phoenix’s innovation doesn’t stop there. Their advanced transmission control computer and traction computer formed the basis for all equivalent modern systems. In a world where computer control of cars was still evolving, Ivera had developed a system that was unobtrusive, functional, and (mostly) stable. Later years would work on the “mostly” part.
Fewer and fewer of them remain on the road each year, but the quality of examples that show up at car shows does not diminish. There is absolutely a great measure of pride that must be taken by owners to keep such a fine yet expensive machine in near immaculate condition.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1992 Madison Ballista 500 GT
The King had kept his crown, though battles to retain it were getting harder. The 1992 re-design of the Madison Ballista took a sharp departure from previous generations, though did not compromise performance in the least.
The Ballista 500 GT had not lost any of the sophistication that owners had expected for 3 generations now. Some wondered if this catering would end up hampering performance, or intimated that the Ballista was too soft and in danger of no longer being a sports car. Well, those same “some” ended up eating crow. The Ballista had not lost its edge one bit. It also had not gained or lost in market; the same kind of people were buying it, and in roughly the same numbers.
Consistency is a good thing when you are doing well, and that is definitely where Madison stood in 1992. Upon the 10th anniversary of the Ballista model a few years earlier, a Ballista Owners Club had formed and quickly spread nationwide. By 1992 it was the largest single-model club in the States, and has remained so to this day.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars, Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1992 Ryuji Goemon RS Turbo
We’ve talked before about the mainstream models that got Ryuji in the door in North America, and those that built their reputation for both quality and unexpected driving pleasure. One model that doesn’t seem to get talked about much in retrospect pieces, however, is the Goemon RS Turbo.
This model was designed purely as a performance coupe, intended to shed the tame and boring image that Ryuji’s mainstream models tended to exude. Styling-wise, it was on point. Performance was very good with a 196HP 2 liter turbo under the hood. And yet, the Goemon failed to gain the kind of traction that Ryuji and the automotive press were expecting.
There are quite a few postulations out there as to why. There was a no-man’s land in the price point that both Ryuji and Kolt found themselves. There were better competitors for a little more money. There were good performance options for a lot less money. The engines were too temperamental and unreliable. Loyal Ryuji buyers weren’t looking for pure performance because they were more family oriented. Every one of these has been proposed. Discussion has happened ad nauseum on the internet over the years (and may never stop).
Despite its proud Ryuji heritage, the Goemon has not attracted the following that other contemporaries have, or even that other classic Ryuji models have. In a way, its a sad, forgotten black sheep of the family, a distinction that is rather unfair.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Counter Culture - Classics
1992 Shijiazhuang L1
Ambition and appetite can easily outperform skill and ability. Combined with failed market research, new Chinese start-up carmaker Shijiazhuang was bitten in 1992.
Their L1 model, the larger upscale wagon, was pitted against an ever-crowding field of premium performance vehicles, mostly sedans. It seemed to be a little leap-before-you-look to some, and quickly they found out their mistake.
Inexpensive Chinese goods were nothing new in America in 1992. From clothing to housewares, it was there. Computers would soon be on their way to that list. It was, however, a shock when a Chinese product arrived on our shores and was significantly more expensive than the competition. For instance, a Hinode Tempest was 5 grand cheaper. Not only was the Armor Valencia also cheaper, but it was significantly better built, as well. Meanwhile, L1 models started having problems with window motors and the traction computer just months after rolling off the boat.
Whether it was from the perception of shoddy workmanship, price point disadvantage due to economic factors, or just plain xenophobia, the Shijiazhuang L1 faced an uphill battle from the start. Perhaps another day, this manufacturer would get a stable foothold in North America. That day was not in 1992, and it certainly wasn’t with the L1.
Their only saving grace, not that anyone was paying attention, was that the L1 was a very safe vehicle, with excellent occupant protection in collisions. At least that was something they could take back to the drawing board, right?
Scores in: Counter Culture - Classics
1992 Wells Apollo
It wasn’t really known in 1992 when Wells released the Apollo, but the days of the personal luxury coupe were nearing an end. If there was ever a car for the last hurrah, to send this segment into that good night, the Wells Apollo would be the one.
Wells took the oval that made family sedans of the era so un-cool, squared it off ever so slightly, and ran with it. Then wrapped that around fine leather, every power feature man could think of, fully automatic climate control, and a kickin stereo system. How good was the Wells stereo? I’ve only ever seen one Apollo in a junkyard that had an aftermarket stereo installed. That’s how good.
Performance, of course, was a must for this class of car. An all-aluminum 5-liter V8 that pushed out 250 horsepower gave good enough motivation for the Apollo to be fun without making it dangerous or consuming absurd amounts of fuel. Road manners were amazing; unlike most floating couches, you got just enough road feedback to feel connected, while still maintaining that cloud-like ride.
It may not be as sleek or timeless as the Ivera Phoenix, but it still holds its own place in automotive history. And if the luxury iron you want to represent must be American, the Apollo is the only choice.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
Round 5 Rankings
Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars
1992 Armor Valencia H33
1990 Hinode Tempest GT Turbo
1990 F&S Seax GT
1990 Keystone Q40 Senator
1992 Ryuji Goemon RS Turbo
1989 Schnell LX35 LSi
1991 Hessenburg F-4 1.6T (US Model)
1989 Longley Lightning Speedwagon
Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1992 Angus Screamer Octane Edition
1992 Ivera Phoenix RXT (NA Market Model)
1988 Rowlari Empress Grand Royale 441ci V10
1992 Wells Apollo
1990 Keystone Q40 Senator
1992 Madison Ballista 500 GT
1989 Matsuma SI-Z
1991 Starley Swerve RSi
1990 CM Hellhound Z3
1989 Munot Levant GS Turbo
Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars
1992 Madison Ballista 500 GT
1990 CM Hellhound Z3
1992 Angus Screamer Octane Edition
1991 Arlington Foxhound SR 348 Disintegrator
1989 IP Celestia GT/TA
1990 Kolt Coyote Mk.3
Mainstream Culture - Retro Motor Sports
1988 RCM Atlantic Mosport SV6
Mainstream Culture - RestoMod
1989 Schnell LX35 LSi
Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics
1990 Bazard Dakar
1991 Starley Swerve RSi
1989 Cabrera Pilgrim GT
1989 Matsuma SI-Z
1990 Sandhurst Louisianno GLE
1990 Mara Irena 2.0i Freedom Edition
1990 FM HiWay 2200L
Counter Culture - Motor Sport
1990 Hinode Tempest GT Turbo
1987 EcaMobile Chipleader 4-door (US version)
1990 Boulder Boundary LE
Counter Culture - Classics
1990 F&S Seax GTA
1987 EcaMobile Chipleader 4-door (US version)
1992 Ryuji Goemon RS Turbo
1988 RCM Atlantic Mosport SV6
1989 Longley Lightning Speedwagon
1991 Hessenburg F-4 1.6T (US Model)
1990 FM HiWay 2200L
1992 Shijiazhuang L1
Counter Culture - Import/Export
1992 Armor Valencia H33
Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
1989 Cabrera Pilgrim GT
1990 Boulder Boundary LE
1990 Mara Irena 2.0i Freedom Edition
1990 Kolt Coyote Mk.3
1990 Bazard Dakar
15 Likes
Final Categories and Rankings
Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars
1966 Madison Trebuchet 427
1986 Armor Streethawk
1992 Armor Valencia H33
1990 Hinode Tempest GT Turbo
1968 Angus Vagabond 353 Sedan Deluxe
1977 Quezon Laguna Super Eagle 427
1990 F&S Seax GT
1970 Madison Trebuchet 427 HP (tie)
1972 Turbol Centurion Gladiator 420 (tie)
1990 Keystone Q40 Senator
1986 Schnell LX20 LSi (T45)
1992 Ryuji Goemon RS Turbo (tie)
1985 Kaizen FC22 (TU1) (tie)
1966 Wells 500 Deluxe Special
1984 Kolt Coyote V8
1989 Schnell LX35 LSi
1982 Keystone D3500 ST Savant
1970 Kaizen FCP19s TU1
1991 Hessenburg F-4 1.6T (US Model)
1989 Longley Lightning Speedwagon
Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1992 Angus Screamer Octane Edition
1972 Armor Anvil
1992 Ivera Phoenix RXT (NA Market Model)
1988 Rowlari Empress Grand Royale 441ci V10
1986 Ivera Executive
1978 Bricksley Grand Sorcerer Pressurized
1978 Neko Maneki Targa
1992 Wells Apollo
1964 CM Deerhound S410
1985 Kaizen FC22 (TU1)
1986 Schnell LX20 LSi (T45)
1990 Keystone Q40 Senator
1973 Wells 500 Convert
1966 Armor Valencia Convertible
1992 Madison Ballista 500 GT
1970 Rowlari Diamondback (tie)
1970 Solariego Copihue (tie)
1975 Lumbaxo Tornado 5.8L
1986 Munot Millenium
1966 Wells 500 Deluxe Special
1989 Matsuma SI-Z
1965 Bricksley Atlantean
1985 Bazard Tormenta (PE)
1991 Starley Swerve RSi
1972 Turbol Centurion Gladiator 420
1982 CM Terrier S1 (A)
1990 CM Hellhound Z3
1979 Schnell L4 Mk1 Sport 8v
1989 Munot Levant GS Turbo
Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars
1975 FM Cerberus
1992 Madison Ballista 500 GT
1985 Madison Ballista 350 GT
1986 Lynx L32 V8
1990 CM Hellhound Z3
1962 Legion Mallard Zepar
1992 Angus Screamer Octane Edition
1979 Madison Ballista 350 GT
1978 Neko Maneki Targa
1984 Bricksley Kingsnake 464 Pressurized
1969 CM Husky A20
1977 CM Spaniel B100
1969 Keystone Q2600 GP (tie)
1970 Shidley Chips 231 Street-Stock (tie)
1970 Courageux 1750s Corse (tie)
1991 Arlington Foxhound SR 348 Disintegrator
1984 Kazuki KZR 2200
1966 Schnell New 1700S
1978 Shidley Violet GT180 “Shelsey Walsh”
1989 IP Celestia GT/TA
1976 Mara Hussar Coupe
1972 Cabrera 3700R
1990 Kolt Coyote Mk.3
Mainstream Culture - Retro Motor Sports
1970 Madison Trebuchet 427 HP
1985 Madison Ballista 350 GT
1979 Madison Ballista 350 GT
1966 Madison Trebuchet 427
1968 Angus Vagabond 353 Sedan Deluxe
1964 CM Deerhound S410
1965 GSI Piccolo 1500 Rallye
1982 Keystone D3500 ST Savant
1988 RCM Atlantic Mosport SV6
1978 Shidley Violet GT180 “Shelsey Walsh”
1968 Franklin HiWay GT
1966 Schnell New 1700S
1969 Keystone Q2600 GP
Mainstream Culture - RestoMod
1970 Shidley Chips 231 Street-Stock
1965 Hessenburg H100 (T2) Super Bus
1976 Dixiecar Levitown 519
1989 Schnell LX35 LSi
1964 Zannin 100 1.5
1970 Rowlari Diamondback
1967 King Pike II 2500 Roadsport V8
1986 Armor Streethawk
1965 Shidley Skidmore 3800 Rapide
1965 GSI Piccolo 1500 Rallye
1968 Franklin HiWay GT
Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics
1965 Hessenburg H100 (T2) Super Bus
1990 Bazard Dakar
1976 Ryuji Shisa 1100 CAEE
1991 Starley Swerve RSi
1976 Dixiecar Levitown 519
1964 Zannin 100 1.5
1989 Cabrera Pilgrim GT
1989 Matsuma SI-Z
1984 Kazuki KZR 2200
1977 Keystone C1700 DL Savant
1967 IP Icarus 2000DX Wagon
1990 Sandhurst Louisianno GLE
1984 IP Commuter “Penny Pincher”
1982 Oldman Pristis GL
1975 Armor Cricket
1975 Monterenzio Rana 305NA
1984 Cabrera Fulgor Turbo
1972 Mara Irena Wagon
1965 Bricksley Atlantean
1971 Hessenburg C200 1700E
1990 Mara Irena 2.0i Freedom Edition
1990 FM HiWay 2200L
1981 F&S Jikan Triple Threat
1974 Bazard Lad
Counter Culture - Motor Sport
1972 Armor Anvil
1990 Hinode Tempest GT Turbo
1981 Ryuji Shogi 4x4
1978 Bricksley Grand Sorcerer Pressurized
1982 CM Terrier S1 (A)
1987 EcaMobile Chipleader 4-door (US version)
1966 Franklin Street
1975 Monterenzio Rana 305NA
1970 Courageux 1750s Corse
1981 F&S Jikan Triple Threat
1990 Boulder Boundary LE
1985 Mara Kanyon
1973 Ivera 120 C6-C6T
1985 Bazard Tormenta (PE)
1967 King Pike II 2500 Roadsport V8
1965 Bazard Armada CR8
1974 IP Rugger 1800
1986 Wells i5 GLS
Counter Culture - Classics
1970 Kaizen FCP19s TU1
1990 F&S Seax GTA
1982 STAG MTMWV Civilian Berserker Pickup Convertible
1987 EcaMobile Chipleader 4-door (US version)
1981 Ryuji Shogi 4x4
1967 Ryuji Chariot 1300
1985 FM Overlander
1965 Shidley Skidmore 3800 Rapide
1992 Ryuji Goemon RS Turbo
1988 RCM Atlantic Mosport SV6
1979 Wells 500
1984 Kolt Coyote V8
1978 Hanseung Saturn 2400SE-L V6 Auto
1989 Longley Lightning Speedwagon
1973 Ivera 120 C6-C6T
1966 Franklin Street (Tie)
1963 Keystone D2200 Super (Tie)
1986 Wells i5 GLS
1971 Bazard Flamenco
1984 Cabrera Fulgor Turbo
1991 Hessenburg F-4 1.6T (US Model)
1969 CM Husky A20
1976 Mara Hussar Coupe
1966 Ivera 77S
1982 Shidley Chips Turbo-LXi (DB3)
1976 Ryuji Shisa 1100 CAEE
1986 Jidosha Kogaku Kumo Te
1990 FM HiWay 2200L
1963 IP Rugger Panel Van
1992 Shijiazhuang L1
Counter Culture - Import/Export
1968 Taube 3000 Rennsport
1985 Hessenburg 2000 RSi 16v
1966 Quezon SuperCab 100 Series (Tie)
1965 Neko Kabu Base (Tie)
1973 Quezon Buenavista 427
1982 Quezon Laguna Dual-Cam Turbo
1986 Valiant La Victoire 1.3 Executive
1986 Jidosha Kogaku Kumo Te
1992 Armor Valencia H33
1974 Bazard Lad
1970 Solariego Copihue
1982 STAG MTMWV Civilian Berserker Pickup Convertible
1965 Bazard Armada CR8
Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
1989 Cabrera Pilgrim GT
1962 Mara Companion SD
1975 Cabrera Trubia GT
1990 Boulder Boundary LE
1971 Hessenburg C200 1700E
1977 Keystone C1700 DL Savant
1984 IP Commuter “Penny Pincher”
1974 IP Rugger 1800
1985 FM Overlander
1990 Mara Irena 2.0i Freedom Edition
1973 Falls Stand Mighty Oak
1979 Schnell L4 Mk1 Sport 8v
1978 Hanseung Saturn 2400SE-L V6 Auto
1963 IP Rugger Panel Van
1990 Kolt Coyote Mk.3
1972 Mara Irena Wagon
1962 Legion Mallard Zapar
1963 Keystone D2200 Super
1990 Bazard Dakar
Thank you all who submitted. It’s been very interesting seeing what all got submitted.
21 Likes
Well, that concludes the whole challenge, I found a lot of ways to create the best possible entry and despite mixed results, I still feel like this is worth it and I hope I could join future rounds of this event.
And here’s a gift from me to you all guys - all of my COP ][ entries. This pack also includes a special gift as well - a 2021 Hessenburg Sirius RSi-X, the firm’s latest hot-hatch entry today.
11 Likes
Thank you for the challenge! I really enjoyed it.
That said I am kinda dazed that my entries seemed to do pretty badly, are there any mistakes that I am making in design? I’m still pretty new at this.
2 Likes
What a way to top off such a fun challenge. Hopefully we get a third rendition of Cult Of Personality so that we can create even more weird and interesting cars to be reviewed. Also, I want to add that the Phoenix is still produced today and has just entered it’s 7th generation offering hybrid drivetrains across all trim levels. I hope Cult Of Personality comes back for a third time
4 Likes
Now that was fun! Actually glad I went with the ‘sensible’ Rowlari and not the ‘wild’ one with the Leviathan V12.
Well, I’ll see all of you either in the next Cult of Personality or in the next Beater Bash, whichever comes first. I’ve already got ideas for either one of those…
4 Likes
That was such an amazing round, I forgotten i even chosen a 4MT over a 5MT, Planned on making it AT at some point
1 Like
If I EVER host a challenge (which I really I would like) I can only hope to be as great as @VicVictory
Dope challenge G.
I personally made 4 new versions of vehicles from this challenge alone.
All honest reviews, good and bad.
Keep up the great work!!
1 Like
That was truly amazing and fun indeed! And it helped me quite a bit to fill in key blanks of the brand history along the way.
Looking forward to anything similar in the future (I presume after LC4.2 stable hit)!
3 Likes
This was really fun, despite having only entered one round and being berated in the reviews
I hope to take part in the next leg of the series!
This has to be one of my favorite challenges yet. Great job. Only thing I’d wish for was an extension of the current round lol.
Even if Angus only were able to get two submissions in, I am pretty happy with the results for the Vagabond and especially with the Screamer - the little Octane studio proved they could make a special car and from that point on, despite the lower sale (but high praises), they will be more and more focused on pure sport cars and supercars following in the Screamer’s footstep, backed by Angus and the Groupe Régal deeper pockets.
A lot of praise has to go to the host for this great challenge and all those who participated. That was really fun.
2 Likes
I only joined this challenge at the very end, and I regret not doing it sooner; Maybe I could have built up more lore. But hey, I dig having a ‘killer car’ lore bit to add to my collection. These write-ups are lifelike and detailed, and I love this comp idea. Anybody up to get another one going?
3 Likes
Laughing my rear parts off again. I can see the TV footage from court, “here’s the suspected serial killer”, with a Celestia GT/TA hiding his face… 
5 Likes
Glad to see that the Ballista and Trebuchet model lines ranked so highly for the rounds in which they were submitted. As a bonus, here is one other trim of the second-gen Ballista that I cooked up shortly after submitting the original 1992 version:
1995 Ballista 540 GTS - 5.4L NA V8, RWD, 6-sp manual, $54,500 AMU, 4.5s 0-60, 194 mph. Too new for the fifth and final round of COP2, but shows how much more potential could be unlocked from the second-gen Ballista.
In addition to the larger engine and extra gearbox ratio, the 540 GTS added larger 18-inch forged magnesium wheels and adaptive dampers, as well as larger brake discs.
The result was a car that was, if anything, even more potent than the standard Ballista 500 GT, and more capable of going toe-to toe with domestic and imported rivals than ever before.
A CD player was standard equipment on all trims for the first time ever, along with adjustable dampers with three settings (Comfort, Normal and Sport), thereby providing a more comfortable experience for the occupants.
Prior to this, I also made a cheaper, less powerful trim each of both the pre- and post-facelift original Ballista. Here they are:
1979 Ballista 305 GS - This entry-level trim was powered by a 160bhp 5.0L V8. However, its lack of power meant that it was constantly overshadowed by the more powerful 350 GT, until its facelift in 1985 (which we’ll get to later), but at least it still handled well.
1985 Ballista 305 GTS - Although the 350 GTS, with its larger 5.7L V8, was the real headline-grabber of the facelifted Ballista range, the entry-level 5.0L V8 wasn’t neglected. It, too, received multi-point EFI as part of the facelift, yielding 225 horsepower - 60 fewer than the larger V8, but at a slightly lower price point.
And this paragraph sums up the effect of the 1992 redesign rather well:
Many thanks to @VicVictory for making this whole challenge possible, and for attracting a consistently strong turnout. I hope there’s a COP3 some time in the future!
7 Likes