1990 Kolt Coyote Mk.3
Welcome to the Island of Misfit Toys, Kolt Coyote. One of the favored sports cars of the previous generation lost a step, and stumbled in the face of competition with its 3rd generation release.
With 260 horsepower and a 7.3 second 0-60, the Coyote wasn’t a poor performer on the street or track. To the contrary, it was a bit faster than the outgoing model. Its performance at the gas pump, however, was absolutely abhorrent, and the model was slapped with a CAFE gas guzzler tax. With a rising price point and severely diminished return, this tax put further strain on the value of the package. In fact, this pushed the price of the Coyote far enough above the similary performing (and far more practical) RCM Atlantic MSV6 to give buyers cause to pause.
Unfortunately for Kolt, sales of their new model were in near free-fall. Adaptation and ingenuity would be necessary for the model to survive.
In the long run, the Coyote turned out to be a relatively reliable, though mostly forgotten, model. There is only a very small following of this model today, and it’s not uncommon to see running examples doing amateur figure 8 racing, being jumped off of berms, or burnouts for the sake of burnouts.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars, Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
1990 Mara Irena 2.0i Freedom Edition
Our runner up for longest model name this week is yet another Maxsim Bricklov turd import special. Using naming that evokes patriotism and freedumbs freedom, he brought in a convertible version of the Mara Irena.
Of course, it is every bit of the ill fitting, wheezy deathtrap that one would expect Bricklov to foist on us lovingly curate for us. So come, my friends. Drop the hammer and try to unleash all 79 horsepower as the wind rushes through your hair. Just… ignore the Geo Metro that just blew your doors off. And the 1978 Keystone C-series that’s giving you a run for your money.
The Irena is a dichotomy of economics and shifting consumer taste. It’s proof that, even if Americans don’t want something, they’ll still buy it if you make it cheap enough. No, the Irena Freedom Edition was not a smashing sales success, not by any measure. But it was not a failure either.
In any case, if you like weird, niche crap, go out and buy three Irenas. You’ll need at least that many to piece together a good body. The engines are pretty reliable, though, so you can keep one as a spare and sell the other to some idiot who wants to throw it in a sand rail or something.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics, Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
1990 Sandhurst Louisianno GLE
I’m not sure if this is being added here more as a personal note or if there’s a broader nostalgic appeal that I’m forgetting. Disclaimer: Mom owned one of these, and it was the car I took my driver’s license test in, and the first car I drove on any regular basis.
Is there anything more oval and blobby than a 90’s compact or mid-sized sedan? Not really. Aerodynamics were the order of the day for squeezing out every mile out of every ounce of fuel, and oval was efficiency chic. So uncool. By that standard, how does a family sedan from the 90’s end up being at least somewhat cool? Don’t leave the 80’s behind entirely. Sandhurst did this with the Louisianno in 1990. It was still pretty upright and boxy, but enough corners were rounded to make it look modern-ish. Not so many that it made it look like a bar of soap.
As for everything else you’re looking for in a sedan? Economy, driving experience, comfort, it’s all there in the Louisianno. It’s not quite like driving a couch, nor is it jarring like an economy car, which is nice because road feel is important.
I used to see these things everywhere. The county had a ton of them in their motor pool. Heck, even the school district had a couple as drivers ed cars. Now they’re all but gone from the road, but I can’t help but smile when I still see one puttering around.
Perhaps nostalgia of a simpler time, before The Adulting happened.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics
1991 Arlington Foxhound SR 348 Disintegrator
Ok, maybe THIS is the longest name of the week. Honestly.
Disintegrator. That was an interesting choice of trim name. Certainly fitting, given how many of them ended up doing so in crashes. See, if there’s one thing the 1991 Arlington Foxhound (SR 348 Disintegrator) is known for, besides being a monstrously powerful 320HP sports coupe, is being a monstrosity to try to control, particularly for drivers with more confidence than skill.
Widowmaker. Crowd control. Unguided missile. The Foxhound has been called all of these, and more. Certainly not without merit. I got a chance to drive one on a track a few years ago. It’s truly a feat for a car to scare the crap out of me, but thats just what this damn thing did. It is FAST, but the line between control and becoming a passenger is razor thin. So yeah, the Foxhound Disintegrator earned every bit of its reputation.
Don’t believe me? Try finding one that’s not at least a LITTLE bit wrecked. I dare you.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars
1991 Hessenburg F-4 1.6T (US Model)
Perhaps Hesseburg took exception to Matsuma trying to muscle in to their market niche in 1989. Perhaps they thought nothing of it, but wanted to make their performance compact able to play with the premium sports sedans of the day. Either case, the Hessenburg F-4 came out in 1991, once again blurring the lines between car categories.
Far too small to be a performance sedan, far too expensive to be a souped up economy hatchback, Hessenburg again invented its own market and blazed a trail. Someone forgot them to take a map and compass with them, however, as that trail led right off a cliff. As much as American buyers were clamoring for performance, there was still too big of a gap in consumer tastes to try to drive this little hatchback wedge into it. Performance car buyers, for the most part, were looking for something bigger and more stately, and budget performance buyers were, well, on a budget. One that couldn’t afford the price tag that put it in the same category as the Hinode Tempest GT Turbo.
Styling, of course, is subjective. The F-4’s styling is definintely polarizing. Especially when presented in “Ogre With Leukemia Green”. It’s hard to say how much that contributed to the failure of the F-4 in the US.
Now if you like shaking things up, that’s EXACTLY what you should take to a cruise-in.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Counter Culture - Classics
1991 Starley Swerve RSi
While Hessenburg was off committing a rare blunder, Starley was showing how one could compete with the Matsuma SI-Z. Enter the 1991 Starley Swerve RSi. A sporty, economical coupe for the youthful masses.
A 0-60 time of 8.3 seconds was really good for an “economy” car of the time, and combined fuel economy of almost 30 miles per gallon was nothing to sneeze at. The Swerve RSi was a very capable, confident machine for its size. Really the only thing anyone ever complained about was the stiff padding in the seats that wore down too quickly.
Now, being British, these just weren’t available in huge numbers like American or Japanese cars. But I do remember seeing a couple of them in the parking lot at high school, and a ton in the campus lots when I went off to college. Then, like everything else British, they just seemed to disappear.
And just like everything else British the seem to just randomly all show up, all at once, at a major car show.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics, Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1992 Angus Screamer Octane Edition
For more than a decade, the Madison Ballista was the undisputed King of American sports cars. Challengers rose and made their mark over the years, but could not usurp the throne. Then, in the twilight of the classic version of the Ballista, another challenger rose in the form of the Angus Screamer Octane Edition.
Over the years, the Ballista had inched more and more upscale, and its price along with it. The Angus Screamer offered something fresh, with a price nearly 10 grand lower than the Ballista. Suspension tuning on the Screamer was far tighter than anything Madison had offered before, and Angus knew that; their marketing campaign posed the Screamer as the complete package. This was compelling to some buyers, mostly those who were used to European sports cars.
For the tastes of red-blooded “All-American” drivers, though, this wasn’t what they were looking for. It was all about hot, nasty speed. Even the outgoing Madison Ballista was faster. The Angus couldn’t compete head to head either with it or the brand new model. Perhaps it didn’t need to. It was a much more striking model to see in person. Something that commanded attention.
I mean, just LOOK at it. Screamer indeed. It looks like it’s screaming down the road, even when sitting still. A little 80’s euphoria that lingered into the 90’s.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars, Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1992 Armor Valencia H33
The inevitable American response to the sports sedan wars came in 1992, in the form of the Armor Valencia H33. Of course, they came in guns blazing, touting scorching speed, and to do it all on a reasonable budget.
5 seconds flat to 60? No problem, the H33 will do that. Room for 5 adults to ride around in style, and loads of creature comfort features for them? Yep, got it. Undercutting the Hinode Tempest by 500 bucks? Yeah, let’s do that too.
Frankly, the Valencia H33 shocked quite a few people in the automotive press who had taken the firm stance that America just couldn’t make a good performance sedan if they tried. Well, not only did they do so, but they put the screws to both Japan and Germany, while just smirking at Britain as they slowly slinked away.
Buyers, frankly, loved it. There were periods where Armor could not build them fast enough. At one point in early 1993, the waitlist was 3 months long. Trying to buy one now, the waitlist may be a bit longer. Seems that people who still own and register them don’t like giving them up. Something about prying the keys from their cold, dead hands.
As an interesting note, there have been several sightings of left-hand drive, US market Valencia H33’s in Japan in recent years. It’s apparently a paperwork nightmare to import over there, but American car enthusiasts in Japan appreciate them as alternatives to the homegrown performance sedans of the era.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Counter Culture - Import/Export
1992 Ivera Phoenix RXT (NA Market Model)
Phoenix seems to be a very fitting same for a model for a company that almost burned itself to ashes once by over-innovating. Over decades of change and trust-building with the pubic, they then became in a position to once again produce a highly innovative model. This time with much better results.
When someone says “European luxury sedan”, the first thing that comes to my mind is the Ivera Phoenix. I know I’m not the only one. First of all, it is a timeless design. Though we all know it’s almost 30 years old, its age doesn’t show. Second, it is an unusual configuration of a Boxer-6 in a luxury car, eschewing the philosophy that more cylinders must be better. Instead, Ivera shows that the right engine is the correct, whatever that may be.
The Phoenix’s innovation doesn’t stop there. Their advanced transmission control computer and traction computer formed the basis for all equivalent modern systems. In a world where computer control of cars was still evolving, Ivera had developed a system that was unobtrusive, functional, and (mostly) stable. Later years would work on the “mostly” part.
Fewer and fewer of them remain on the road each year, but the quality of examples that show up at car shows does not diminish. There is absolutely a great measure of pride that must be taken by owners to keep such a fine yet expensive machine in near immaculate condition.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1992 Madison Ballista 500 GT
The King had kept his crown, though battles to retain it were getting harder. The 1992 re-design of the Madison Ballista took a sharp departure from previous generations, though did not compromise performance in the least.
The Ballista 500 GT had not lost any of the sophistication that owners had expected for 3 generations now. Some wondered if this catering would end up hampering performance, or intimated that the Ballista was too soft and in danger of no longer being a sports car. Well, those same “some” ended up eating crow. The Ballista had not lost its edge one bit. It also had not gained or lost in market; the same kind of people were buying it, and in roughly the same numbers.
Consistency is a good thing when you are doing well, and that is definitely where Madison stood in 1992. Upon the 10th anniversary of the Ballista model a few years earlier, a Ballista Owners Club had formed and quickly spread nationwide. By 1992 it was the largest single-model club in the States, and has remained so to this day.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars, Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1992 Ryuji Goemon RS Turbo
We’ve talked before about the mainstream models that got Ryuji in the door in North America, and those that built their reputation for both quality and unexpected driving pleasure. One model that doesn’t seem to get talked about much in retrospect pieces, however, is the Goemon RS Turbo.
This model was designed purely as a performance coupe, intended to shed the tame and boring image that Ryuji’s mainstream models tended to exude. Styling-wise, it was on point. Performance was very good with a 196HP 2 liter turbo under the hood. And yet, the Goemon failed to gain the kind of traction that Ryuji and the automotive press were expecting.
There are quite a few postulations out there as to why. There was a no-man’s land in the price point that both Ryuji and Kolt found themselves. There were better competitors for a little more money. There were good performance options for a lot less money. The engines were too temperamental and unreliable. Loyal Ryuji buyers weren’t looking for pure performance because they were more family oriented. Every one of these has been proposed. Discussion has happened ad nauseum on the internet over the years (and may never stop).
Despite its proud Ryuji heritage, the Goemon has not attracted the following that other contemporaries have, or even that other classic Ryuji models have. In a way, its a sad, forgotten black sheep of the family, a distinction that is rather unfair.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Counter Culture - Classics
1992 Shijiazhuang L1
Ambition and appetite can easily outperform skill and ability. Combined with failed market research, new Chinese start-up carmaker Shijiazhuang was bitten in 1992.
Their L1 model, the larger upscale wagon, was pitted against an ever-crowding field of premium performance vehicles, mostly sedans. It seemed to be a little leap-before-you-look to some, and quickly they found out their mistake.
Inexpensive Chinese goods were nothing new in America in 1992. From clothing to housewares, it was there. Computers would soon be on their way to that list. It was, however, a shock when a Chinese product arrived on our shores and was significantly more expensive than the competition. For instance, a Hinode Tempest was 5 grand cheaper. Not only was the Armor Valencia also cheaper, but it was significantly better built, as well. Meanwhile, L1 models started having problems with window motors and the traction computer just months after rolling off the boat.
Whether it was from the perception of shoddy workmanship, price point disadvantage due to economic factors, or just plain xenophobia, the Shijiazhuang L1 faced an uphill battle from the start. Perhaps another day, this manufacturer would get a stable foothold in North America. That day was not in 1992, and it certainly wasn’t with the L1.
Their only saving grace, not that anyone was paying attention, was that the L1 was a very safe vehicle, with excellent occupant protection in collisions. At least that was something they could take back to the drawing board, right?
Scores in: Counter Culture - Classics
1992 Wells Apollo
It wasn’t really known in 1992 when Wells released the Apollo, but the days of the personal luxury coupe were nearing an end. If there was ever a car for the last hurrah, to send this segment into that good night, the Wells Apollo would be the one.
Wells took the oval that made family sedans of the era so un-cool, squared it off ever so slightly, and ran with it. Then wrapped that around fine leather, every power feature man could think of, fully automatic climate control, and a kickin stereo system. How good was the Wells stereo? I’ve only ever seen one Apollo in a junkyard that had an aftermarket stereo installed. That’s how good.
Performance, of course, was a must for this class of car. An all-aluminum 5-liter V8 that pushed out 250 horsepower gave good enough motivation for the Apollo to be fun without making it dangerous or consuming absurd amounts of fuel. Road manners were amazing; unlike most floating couches, you got just enough road feedback to feel connected, while still maintaining that cloud-like ride.
It may not be as sleek or timeless as the Ivera Phoenix, but it still holds its own place in automotive history. And if the luxury iron you want to represent must be American, the Apollo is the only choice.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
Round 5 Rankings
Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars
1992 Armor Valencia H33
1990 Hinode Tempest GT Turbo
1990 F&S Seax GT
1990 Keystone Q40 Senator
1992 Ryuji Goemon RS Turbo
1989 Schnell LX35 LSi
1991 Hessenburg F-4 1.6T (US Model)
1989 Longley Lightning Speedwagon
Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1992 Angus Screamer Octane Edition
1992 Ivera Phoenix RXT (NA Market Model)
1988 Rowlari Empress Grand Royale 441ci V10
1992 Wells Apollo
1990 Keystone Q40 Senator
1992 Madison Ballista 500 GT
1989 Matsuma SI-Z
1991 Starley Swerve RSi
1990 CM Hellhound Z3
1989 Munot Levant GS Turbo
Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars
1992 Madison Ballista 500 GT
1990 CM Hellhound Z3
1992 Angus Screamer Octane Edition
1991 Arlington Foxhound SR 348 Disintegrator
1989 IP Celestia GT/TA
1990 Kolt Coyote Mk.3
Mainstream Culture - Retro Motor Sports
1988 RCM Atlantic Mosport SV6
Mainstream Culture - RestoMod
1989 Schnell LX35 LSi
Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics
1990 Bazard Dakar
1991 Starley Swerve RSi
1989 Cabrera Pilgrim GT
1989 Matsuma SI-Z
1990 Sandhurst Louisianno GLE
1990 Mara Irena 2.0i Freedom Edition
1990 FM HiWay 2200L
Counter Culture - Motor Sport
1990 Hinode Tempest GT Turbo
1987 EcaMobile Chipleader 4-door (US version)
1990 Boulder Boundary LE
Counter Culture - Classics
1990 F&S Seax GTA
1987 EcaMobile Chipleader 4-door (US version)
1992 Ryuji Goemon RS Turbo
1988 RCM Atlantic Mosport SV6
1989 Longley Lightning Speedwagon
1991 Hessenburg F-4 1.6T (US Model)
1990 FM HiWay 2200L
1992 Shijiazhuang L1
Counter Culture - Import/Export
1992 Armor Valencia H33
Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
1989 Cabrera Pilgrim GT
1990 Boulder Boundary LE
1990 Mara Irena 2.0i Freedom Edition
1990 Kolt Coyote Mk.3
1990 Bazard Dakar