The 2022 Trafikjournalen 24h clunker challenge (FINAL RESULTS)

[karhgath]

Team Prognosis Negative

Chapter II - Not so Touring

Anna was pretty happy. She just registered the car and the team right before the deadline… without even knowing if the car actually worked. She was sure they would have the coolest car there, the Octane edition of the Touring is really part of motorsport history.

Anyway, it is not up to her to handle the car, that’s all Anton… he’s got to figure it out after what the boys pulled off buying that bucket of rust…

Hmmm… isn’t it supposed to have full aluminium panels?

The Inspection

Anna

registered w/ name prognosis negative

kk

Anton was anxious. The trio had the car dropped off at his father’s garage. Anna just registered the team, Johan named it. He started to binge Seinnfeld on Netflix. Anton did not like it much, it was old awkward and they could not even act to save their life. Anyway, he had to focus now on getting that car ready for doing a lap around the track. At least one to not be embarassed.

The towtruck dropped the car and left in a hurry. Looking at it again, the lines looked good, but it looked like crap.

“I am sure other rustbuckets will be entered, but ours will be the coolest and rarest rust bucket!” he shouted to himself, trying to keep the abject fear of failure at bay.

He did not like his uncle Josef much. Not for any reason, just because love is not something that runs in his family. Anton respected him tho, he helped start his father’s garage and is a great mechanic, just not a very good human being.

At the same time Anton was lost in his thoughts, Josef got out of the garage and a big Estonian swear could be heard. Anton recognized it, even if mastery of his family’s language was not great.

Josef - “What have you brought you dimwitted nephew!?”

Anton - “Hi uncle.” He took a long breath and tried to look excited. “We found a Régal Touring motorsport for cheap and will run it in the 24h race!!!”

Josef - “Hmmm… really? That does not look like a 95 Touring…”

Anton - “It’s a 93…”

Josef - “Octane did not start tuning Touring until 95.”

Anton - “Oh…”

Josef - “And the Tourings were all aluminium and allow wheels. What do you see on the rims and body? Would that be rust?”

Anton - “Well…”

Josef - “And does aluminium rusts?”

Anton - “Well it corrodes…”

Josef - “I would not call that corroded… It does not even look like motorsports rims there. In fact the rugged hatch plastic makes me thinks this is an all terrain…”

Anton - “All-Wheel Drive?!”

Josef - “No, an all terrain 4x4 Régal. You see the 265 badge in the back, that would make sense. Definitely not a 3.5L for sure in there, I can bet. The 4x4 batch was removed for sure.”

By that time Anton was ready to curl up in a ball.

Anna

registered w/ name prognosis negative

kk

halp, plz come here

omw

Josef - “Let’s get this bucket inside so I can at least look at it.”

Anton was a bit depressed. He should have done more research, he was simply too excited. It was also mostly Johan’s money he wasted… Anna will know how to handle him.

As they got in, Anton’s father was in the back.

Josef to his brother - “You son is a dufus, he bought a piece of shit.”

Father - “Ya! You remember the old astra? Who bought that again brother?”

Josef - “Oh sure, go for the jugular some swearing”

Josef inspected the car toroughly. A few swears words, many silences, some odd comments. Anna arrived during this long interlude.

Anna - “Hey. I assume it’s bad?”

Anton - “I do not think we bought the right car…”

Josef - “Definitely not.”

Anna - “Oh, hello Josef. So not good.”

Josef - “Want bad or good news?”

Anna, looking at Anton - “Bad first?”

Josef gets out from under the car, sweating. He was not young or even in shape anymore.

Josef - “This is clearly not a motorsport legend you got from some random dude on the World Wide Web.”

Anton mumbling - “No one calls it that anymore…”

Josef - “I am pretty sure it is a Régal 265 4x4 Estate. A '91 MY. It has a 3.0L pretty lazy engine with plenty of torque. It is not AWD but a 4x4 with a manual locker, not LSD. That will help you to climb a mountaint but not much on the track. The check engine light is lit, but I assume this is the least of your worries. Rear suspension is rusted nearly through. Rust also got into the chassis itself…”

Anna - “Can it run?”

Anton was mortified. It’s not even gonna run, Johan wasted 10k…

Josef - “Don’t you want to hear the good news before?”

Anna - “There is good news?”

Josef - “Ya. The gearbox and radiators are brand new, but it was clearly an automatic before and a manual 5-speed now. Electrics are good, power steering pump seems new, brakes are surprisingly unused. Beside, the Régal 4x4 was renowned to be a tank. Albeit a rusting tank in this case… It has mac front and STA rear, so not motorsport for sure. Engine seems to run, but I’ll let you figure it out. Not turbo, but it does have about 220 hp. It seems to have been modified to race, not sure for what kind of events, but I’d say you could maybe outlast competition if you take care of your rear end.”

Anna - “It runs?”

Josef - “It runs.”

Anton was relieved. They have a car.

Josef, looking at Anton - “How the hell did you mistake this for a Touring Octane?”

Anton - “Well, th-the guy sent me a pic-picture…”

Josef - “Ohh, that is a nice BMW M5, with a bit of photoshop. Not even a Régal.”

Anna laughed, which made Anton recoil in fear. She never laughs.

Anna - “For a smart guys, you are so stupid sometimes Anton” she said, endearingly. “Let me take care of Johan. Thanks Josef!”

Josef - “No problem dear.”

He gave a “what are you waiting for?” look at Anton before rolling back under the car.

Josef - “I’ll be done in two hours. We better get it to the circuit with the truck, no need to drive it too much.”

'91 Régal 265 3.0L 4x4 Estate

• 3.0L Inline 6 with 217 hp
• 4x4 with manual locker
• Rusted steel panels and chassis
• Rusted steel wheels
• brand new 5 speed manual transmission with Mac front and rusted STA rear

[Madrias]

Team Shift Happens

---

As other cars began to arrive, Kaylie smiled, seeing some of their competition at the track. Sure, some teams had waited until the last minute to finish their interior removal, and appeared to be playing a game of D&D while they waited for the start of the race, and other teams had fully complete cars, but the results were the same: There was a lot of rust in the pit lane right now.

Takaraya watched as a cat weaved its way through the pit lane, a little curious as to who brought a pet to the track. (@AndiD) As said cat jumped up on top of their rolling toolbox and promptly sat down on the lid, he sighed. “Really? Not a good place for you,” Takaraya said.

Rukari solved the cat-on-the-toolbox problem by accidentally bumping into the toolbox while fighting to buckle the strap on his military helmet, causing said cat to jump down and wander off again. Jayde looked over at the Ox-Racers’ lane and called out, “Hey, if you guys are the ones who brought the cat, please keep an eye on it. While we’re careful, we can’t say for certain that our fellow competitors will be.”

Rukari reached into the car, pulled the handle under the seat, and slid it to the back of the rails before climbing in. He pulled the safety harness over his shoulders and buckled in, making sure that his tail was over the belts and not trapped underneath. Seeing the track was empty, he started the engine, dropped the car into drive, and the Grand Warden rumbled its way out onto the track.

Malavera grimaced as Rukari lit up the rear tires almost immediately upon crossing the start line for his practice lap. “Yeah, he’s definitely either going to guide us to victory or outright trash the car,” Malavera said.

“Or both, knowing him,” Kivenaal quipped. As the car hurtled around the track and headed for the pit lane, Rukari turned the lightbar on and yelped the sirens to get people’s attention, cruising slowly to the Shift Happens stall, where the lights went off along with the loud-as-hell V8.

“How’s it feel out there?” Kaylie asked.

“Like bag of snakes. Very squirmy,” Rukari replied. “Very fast, too.”

“Think you’re up for the first segment?” Kayden asked.

“Ne kasi. Will not be problem,” Rukari added.

---

(OOC: Obligatory translations: Ne kasi = “No work” or, not-so-literally translated, “No problem” in Valraad. As for where the others in my team are, they’re probably sitting down, waiting for the chaos to begin.)

[TheYugo45GV]

Desert Scavengers

---

Off to the Races

---

After several hours of driving through the Swedish countryside, the race track finally came into view. Had Marcel not taken a wrong turn, and if they weren’t towing nearly 2 tons of Union Magistrate behind their SUV, They’d have been there a lot sooner. But, it was well worth it, the track was packed with various cars. Most notable was the Bricksley Grand Warden 9G11, which by many was considered the Magistrate LE-58’s natural sparring partner.

“Well, I can tell we are already in for some fun.” Marcel observed.

Rocco was unamused. “Fun as in you’ll crash this thing because you refused to fix the front suspension. Not to mention the fact you and I had a huge argument when I told you we had to replace the brake master cylinder.”

“There was no need to do any of that, Rocco. It’s all too expensive to try and fix.”

“How do you expect to stop then?”

The only reply he got was Marcel rolling his eyes and sighing. “Okay then. I guess you’ll have to thank me for fixing the leak in the steering rack, I guess”

Harlow then joined in on the conversation. “I don’t think silicone is gonna hold for very long.”

Rocco shrugged. “It only needs to hold on for 24 hours. Plus, there’s the temperamental transmission and the horribly varnished fuel tank. It’s a real shitbox.”

“I hope it doesn’t start disintegrating as we drive it down the track. The last thing we need is the hood flying open.”

“Yeah, It’s a little hard to see the track through a piece of sheet metal.” One of the twins began. “I don’t think I’ll be able to drive with my head out the window if I’m strapped in.”

Her twin sister, Camile finally woke up and started speaking. “Cheyenne, with how competitive you get, you’ll probably cause that.”

The gate to the pits opened automatically as Westminster made the turn into the track. After cruising slowly down the pit lane, the huge black SUV came to a stop after reaching the bay right next to the folks in the Grand Warden, where a female Tigrilian was tinkering with something under the hood.

This discovery piqued Marcel’s curiosity. “A Tigrillian? Don’t we live in the same system as them?”

Rocco Nodded. “Sort of, our planets orbit at the same rate, but when it’s winter for us in Caracalia’s northern hemisphere, it’s summer for them in their northern hemisphere. So we’re on opposite sides of the same star.”

“Interesting.”

Following Marcel’s poor trailer parking job, the crew began to unload their car and get their tools into the pit bay. The sound of the Magistrate’s V8 engine starting up, caught the attention of a few teams thanks to its lack of muffler.

It was graceful spectacle until Rocco backed it into a tool box, knocking it over with a loud crash. Amongst all the pandemonium, Harlow noticed the two Khalans in the neighboring pit bay, a white furred Orthrian and a gray normal one with metal limbs milling about. The white one was busy typing away on a large military laptop, while the gray one was minding his own business.

Harlow sighed, the one with metal limbs had a striking resemblance to the Khalan king, and even though the Von Heislingburgs were on good terms with the Khalans, he knew that he would have to be extra careful about what he said or did in the presence of the cybernetic wolf. Before another thought could set in, Harlow realized that he was staring, and before the gray Khalan turned around he averted his gaze and resumed sorting the sockets in the kit he brought.

But, with all that aside, it would be a battle of the police cars and there would be lots of high speed automotive chaos to come.

---

A short post for now, just to get my team to the races and then I can start collabing

To Be Continued

[Texaslav]

Team Postgraduate Psychosis Chapter 0.2: Testing, Testing, 1-2-Ohgod

---

The gang, having plonked the engine into the car and verified that it works, embark on a test run - exiting the city and heading towards the nearest forest road.

Julia: This stinks! Why’d you go and rip out the front seat before the race? I’m gonna be sick!

Ulf: I did it because you told me we needed to strip the car. Though with the way your l-oooo-ve is shitfing, I am starting to regret it myself!

Gunther: Lay off me! Ain’t my fault this linkage is a total horse’s ass. Did your brother dive into the engine bay and tie a knot with the shift cable or something?

Julia: As if he could do that! I might be sick if you keep this up, though. Not that there’s any interior left to ruin here!

Ulf: If I had known it would be this bad, I would have removed the back bench right off the bat, too, then Gunther could have test-driven this abomination alone. And I would not have had to worry about getting tetanus or something!

Julia: Gotta admit, the amount of rust on the floorpan and on the inside of the doors is unbelievable. How did so much moisture get inside, anyhow? It’s a goddamn embarrassment!

Gunther: Clam up, both of you! We’re coming up to a fast one!

The Carver enters a wide bend on the forest road; Gunther stubbornly holds 65 mph throughout, resulting in his unsupported backseat passengers being thrown to the side

Gunther: You alright back there?

Ulf: Yeah, peachy. Just keep in mind that the only thing between your girl and the road is a load of duct tape!

Gunther: Okay, okay, I’ll lay off. But you felt that, right? This thing’s got grip.

Julia: I’ll get a grip on your neck and squeeze till you’re dead if you do that again!

Gunther: Jeez. Guess this thing’s basically a one-seater now, isn’t it?

The three get back to the garage without much further drama. The test drive wasn’t enough to ascertain the car’s competence, but some lessons have been learned: 1) The back seat goes. 2) The shifter sucks 3) The engine actually sounds pretty nice - there’s even something to be said about the lifter tick symphony it engages in whenever idle.

Chapter 0.2 End

[interior]

Team Slow
Part 2, To the races! (And Beyond)

Previous parts.

Team Slow, The return
Part 0, The Beginning to the hopeful finale of the event.
The 2022 Trafikjournalen 24h clunker challenge (PRE-RACE) - #34 by interior

Part 1, It will make it to the races, maybe?
The 2022 Trafikjournalen 24h clunker challenge (PRE-RACE) - #72 by interior

—

---

After we’ve driven to the pits, of course having our shitbox towed to preserve it until the race. It was in a drivable state, a bare minimum for the race. The Swedish roads were enjoyable to drive on, 4x4 SUV towing a turd! But that’s besides the point.

Izzy was unsurprising excited as she got the chance to get on the track soon, Matt gets into the car and takes it on the track as he has more experience in racing the cars. Izzy stands by and watches him drive it around the track enjoying the Swedish countryside.

Matt: The steering i- Damnit I’ve lost power steering!

Izzy: You’re strong enough, besides it probably weighs nothing. How’s it going though?

Matt: Its tires are about as slippery as the rainbow road track, besides that it’s still got power.

Izzy: Nice to hear.

To the both of their suprises, they learned one thing about this car. It has very sticky brakes and it’s about as slippery as a pimp with its ancient tires and less than stellar handling. Maybe the power steering fluid is as old as the tires.

(Ooc: this is another short because during the time of writing I’m not home)

[Elizipeazie]

Team Shift Happens; the human side of things

in collaboration with @Knugcab

---

While Valentin was away trying to persuade the race officials that he can run his experimental vehicle after the race is concluded, Norse went out to make some friends along the pit lane. Dodging a rather curious cat on his way out of the garage, he went down near the garage doors, passing various teams and their cars, eventually arriving at the Trafikjournalen garage.
He takes a peek inside, and upon spotting that they did not seem too busy at the moment.
As a result, he takes a few steps in and makes himself known:

“Hello there. Hope i’m not disturbing you in whatever it is you’re doing.”, he said, taking a glance around the garage.
“Hi”, Filip answered. “Nah, not really, we’re more or less done with most of our stuff now, I guess. Which team are you a member of?”
“I… don’t actually know the name of the team itself.”, Norse admitted rather sheepishly. “But it’s the giant furry-costume-type people a few boxes further down that i am kinda a member of now. Truth be told, i’m mostly watching with another close friend of mine. How about you?”

Filip looked at Norse as if he had seen some strange creature. “But…you look…normal?”, he said and laughed. Then he pointed at the giant “Trafikjournalen” stickers all over the Saarland. “Well, we’re the magazine staff team, so…smash our car and you will get a subscription for twice the regular price! Only today!”
It was only now that Norse noticed the massive stickers being present, which was made obvious by him facepalming.
“God i’m stupid.”, he muttered, as the hand went back down and into his pocket. “Though wouldn’t it be more logical for the magazine to run about and… do journalism stuff?”

Erik Carlén looked up from underside the Saarland where he was doing some final checks. “Oh, don’t worry, there is some guys having that lazy job during the 24 hour run…and then there is us poor blokes that they send out to humiliate ourselves, as always!”
“Oh, so it’s a separate team doing the data-gathering. Anyway… looks like you got a massive yacht of a car similar to our… well, their US police cruiser.”, Norse said, in reference to the Bricksley Grand Warden that they brought along.’
“I didn’t have much of a say in car choice, with me being a last-minute member and not even having a license and all.”, he added, dragging his right foot across the floor a bit as if he just admitted to having done something terrible.

“Probably as big as an european will get if you exclude S-classes and such”, Mats Hansen said, having listened to their conversation for a while. “But unlike the Bricksley, no V8 here, haha. At least it is the 2.6 litre inline six, so one of the better models. Yeah, there was always the ES-24, the 3 litre 24 valve, but when was the last time you saw one of them?”
“Huh… To me it looks like a worn-out wagon that was fetched off of some scrapyard and then about as haphazardly stitched together like my bicycle is. Visually at least, not trying to diss the mechanical work that was done underneath.”, Norse remarked, thereby exemplifying his lack of car-specific knowledge.

Filip Andersson laughed a bit. “We haven’t done much, really. Just a regular service and removing some unnecessary crap, other than that it is more or less stock, so diss it all you want.”
“As said, my bike is a clusterfuck of parts that somehow works, so it might also do it here.”, Norse commented, shrugging as he simply doesn’t know any better. Though he still was curious about where they got it from. “So… is it a junkyard find or was it actually roadworthy when you got it?”
“I more or less took it from the hands of my grandmother”, Filip sighed and kicked the red front bumper. “Guess why it looks like this?”
Norse then started to think hard, getting stuck in the process for a good minute or so.
“Uhm… lack of care?”, he eventually blurted out, still confused as to how a car could’ve ended up like this.

“That’s one way to see it”, Filip said. “She drove it straight into the flagpole in some guys yard, don’t ask me how she succeeded to do that, so I had to get a new bumper from the junkyard for her, but they didn’t have one in beige so I had to take a red one. Then she started to hit about everything that came in her way, hence all the scratches and dings, so I finally decided that it was downright dangerous for her to keep driving, and I think that I managed to convince her too…”
“There’s the dickheads that think they own the road and then there’s the oblivious elderly people that think they can still drive with the reaction times measured on a calendar…”, Norse grumbled, just as Valentin was walking past the Trafikjournalen pit box.
“Hi there. Got the green light for half an hour after the race finishes.”, Valentin said to Norse, stopping to take a look into the Saarland’s garage as well. A view which consisted of 85% wagon roof.
“Sweet! Wanna get your car out then?”, Norse replied, which was met with a dismissive hand-wave.
“Not yet. event hasn’t even started, so i’m not in a hurry. So you’re making some friends, i see?”, Valentin inquired, eyeing the Trafikjournalen team members around their car.

“Oh well”, Filip said and looked over to Norse again. Then he looked over to Val and nodded to him as a simplistic way of saying hello to him while being absorbed in the conversation with Norse. “I remember the last time I was riding with her. You remember that nasty accident involving the PB8 Sprinter and some cyclists? Well, I am pretty sure that was the Sprinter that she cut off with her dangerous driving just before the happening of that accident. We took another way so I never saw the accident in itself but I am still pretty sure. So…I don’t really know. That might have upset the driver of the PB8 and taken his concentration a bit off the road, who knows? A dangerous driver was something she was anyway.”
As Filip recalled that the previous owner of the Saarland had cut-off the what was obviously the very sprinter that caused the accident, he went white. A similar reaction was seen from Valentin, though far less pronounced courtesy of him already being the palest person in the pit lane.
“Uhm… about that… i have a hunch that i want to confirm. Did that happen about 15 Kilometers east of Gothenburg?”, he said, anxious about potentially digging deeper than the newly met people are comfortable with.
“Was there another accident of this magnitude?”, Valentin added, having missed a substantial part of the news earlier this year due to hospital time.

“Yeah, exact that one”, Filip answered. “I am sure you have heard about it.”
“Heard would be an understatement…”, Norse mumbled, still about as pale as Valentin naturally is.
“I think this is not the moment to be bothering them with our story.”, Valentin said, taking two steps over to Norse and placing one hand on his shoulder.
“Unless you want to know, that is.”, he added, now directed towards Filip.

“Want to know what?”, Filip asked. “We were never involved in the accident, I didn’t even see it, we took another way, I just remember that she cut off a PB8 Sprinter on the exact same road just a while before that accident happened, one of the few things I remember since I was scared for life. So I don’t need any more details, there is no legal stuff or something involved for our part. I have just been wondering if that might have been one of the reasons why it happened at all.”
“You weren’t, but we were.”, Norse blurted out as a short-circuit reply, before mentally crashing, rendering him basically frozen.
“I don’t remember much of it, but as i’ve been told, i was the first ‘pin’ that was collected by the massive van-shaped bowling ball that was the Sprinter. Needless to say, i’m now full of titanium, riddled with road rash scarring and i owe him my life.”, Valentin explained in a heavily-condensed variant of the full story while giving Norse’s shoulder a light shake. Said shake apparently broke Norse’s freeze-state, as he takes a confused look around the garage once more.

Filip was the other one that almost froze, hearing this and seeing both of them and their reactions.
“Did I say something stupid now?”, was his reaction. “Damn, I always do and say stupid things! Why?”, he said and went into the driver’s seat of the Saarland.
“No…please…NO! Stop acting like a kid now and grow some balls!”, Mats said firmly to him.
“Why does it always end up like this in one way or another?”, he grumbled and hit the steering wheel of the Saarland with his fist.

HOOOOOOOOOOONK!

Erik Carlén came out from underneath the Saarland again, lightly shaken by the horn abuse.
“Great, now I am deaf too! Calm down and be quiet or we’ll get a Salon for the race next year!”

Filips reaction to the story made Norse feel bad that he had spilled the beans in the first place.
“I’m sorry. Should’ve kept quiet.”, he said in what was possibly the most sincere voice he could muster.
“You didn’t do anything wrong. Nor did your grandma, at least in the immediate sense from what i know. Everyone’s still alive, i’m here, having taken the brunt of it, apparently, and the accident itself is half a year in the past.”, Valentin said in an attempt to calm down both Norse and the foreign team. “I think we should get going. Has been pleasant to meet you.”, he added, before leaving while almost dragging Norse along with him.
“Yeah, he is a bit sensitive”, Mats Hansen sighed, “so it may be better if you leave so he can calm down. Nice to meet you anyway!”

Norse and Valentin made their way back to the Shift Happens pit garage, with Norse being rather distraught about having mortified Filip in the process of trying to meet them.
As they got to the remainder of Shift Happens, Kaylie immediately noticed something off with Norse and went to apply her usual remedy, going in for a hug.
Valentin meanwhile found himself an almost comically small fold-up chair, which apparently was child-sized by the looks of it as even a slav-squat would have his butt further off the ground than that chair does.
With the race about to start and team morale below optimal for at least the humans, time went on as Norse went out back to collect himself.

[Maverick74]

Team If It's Not Punk It's Junk

Prologue Part Two

Part One Here

The Clash - London Calling (Official Video)

London is calling

The next weekend the band piles into their 25 year old Transit van and head down south to check out Ox’s pop’s ride. A few hours of slogging down the M6 and M1 finds the gang outside a run-down garage in Watford, north of London
“Right then,” *Ox replies quietly while glancing at the map app on his phone, “This be the address my pops told me he stashed the Cambridge. Let’s go and have a word with the proprietor.”
Ox leads the others into the shabby place, which seems to be very much deserted.

“Bugger all, this place is a dump. You sure this is the correct address Ox?” Fern remarks before cupping her hands around her mouth and shouts out, “Oi! Anyone here even?!”
Ox cocks an eyebrow at the outburst and sighs as a short, rotund man with a scowl comes out of the corner office of the garage. He Looks each of them down before answering “Didn’t know the circus was in town. What do you want? Ain’t be looking for a show here, this is a place of business you know.”
Alyssa and Fern scoff at the remark and look to about to let fists fly , but Ox calmly cuts them off and replies in a crisp voice, “Good morning, sir, I’m Olly Ferguson. Derek Ferguson is my father, says you two used to work together as cabbies, yeah? We’re here to pick up the car he has stored here.”
the shop owner grunts “You’re Derek’s kid, huh? Sweet Mary, Mother, and Joseph.” he looks the group up and down again “Right, he called up, saying you’d might be comin’. Here, it’s around back. You brought a trailer with you, right?” the band follows the man through the back of the shop to get a glimpse of their racer

They stand in stunned silence for a moment at what is greeting them
“Old on, Ox, lemmie see the picture of the car on your phone again,” asks Alyssa. He pulls it out to show her, having his arm nearly pulled out of it’s socket as she grabs his hand holding down to her face
“You sure this is the same car, mate? Why isn’t it green?”
Ox sheepishly scratches the back of his head before answering, “I only said it looks a bit like this, ain’t ever seen the thing me self. Just going off what my pops told me.”

Fern stomps the ground, tilts her head back and screams “Augh! You bloody pillock! This ain’t a car, it belongs in a skip! You drug us all hours away from home for this?!” she storms off, kicking bits of litter scattered about. Iggy cracks his neck, hawks and gobs, before examining the Cambridge closer.
“Aye 'hink it may not be all bad. Seems o be the major bits are all here, mostly.”
“…it’s missing the front wing,” *Alyssa points out bluntly, “And someone nicked the tyres.”
Iggy shrugs “Aye, a bit. But ‘hats just details. Bit of the ol’ spit and polish and Bob’s yer uncle! Ee a banger in no time!”
Fern gives up her pursuit of relocating junk with her feet and turns to her father “Bloody hell, are you serious? You really think this dustbin special is worth saving?” she pinches the brim of her nose “Bloody hell, you are soo cheap.”
“Aye, you arn lookin’ at it right, love. It’s all 'bout the show! The presentation, see?” Iggy spreads his arms out as if to showcase the car “Wit the righ amount of style, tis could be a true rocker, innit? Is got the right aesthetics, ya know?”
Fern rolls her eyes “Oh, bugger off!”

Ox politely coughs and asks, “So we be taking it back to Manchester then?”
Fern screws her eyes shut and clenches her jaw “Whatever, it’s what we came down here for, innit? Well, go on, see if you can get some tyres for it and we’ll load it up.”

[MrdjaNikolen]

Team Mravolinski-Chitco
Pre-race: What the team is doing?

Chitco duo

Decided to chill out near the car, ready to potentially decide who of them is going first…lets be honest, Mat will be too busy with other stuff to jump into cockpit when its time to go.

---

They also noticed arrival of pet of fellow competitor…or is that just a stray cat finding its way into the pits?
No way for them to know, but it surely is known to us, fellow readers: its Mary from Oxracers (@AndiD).

Important thing to know is that there was still some dog food in car and all doors were closed, former fact becoming rather obvious to this cat.
Mary as result has examined why said car smells like there is food in there, quickly realising the reason.

She also noticed duo that had decided to observe her bcos that seemed more interesting than having small talk and drinking some juice.
As they havent seemed to be violent, she approached with caution.

Its tough being a cat, so you kinda need to recharge sometimes.
She saw that there is high opportunity for free food and pets, so why not?

After deciding this is enough, thank-you meow occured and…ye, this cat is going other places.

---

Police siren is never particularly pleasant sound and at first it got them confused, atleast until they stood up and took look at track.

Rukari seemed to have quite some fun in test run
From their perspective, it seemed like some oversized weirdo having some fun in police car
Stickers were noted, tho
“Shift Happens…wait, why does that strike me as familiar?”
“Hmm…i do recall us talking to Mrdja and VerBanka the other day…”
“Right. If i understood them correctly, these guys were hosts of that Shitbox run earlier this year. They were right on saying that they seem very unusual.”
“Yea…nothing to worry about, except for fact this lad seems to be very agressive driver…and crash with them would not end well for our car.”
“I do recall Mrdja telling me one of them had almost hit their car in said rally, hurling towards them from opposite direction…i wonder if this guy is related to that guy?”

Not exactly best choice of words to mark that exact person, but what could be done?
And there he had good reason for speeding tbh.
Bcos i know this wouldnt be as great opportunity for interaction and bcos Madrias tends to read everything anyway, pinging him would have to wait until better part of this prerace post.

Mat

I know where Mat is going, you know where Mat is going even @Knugcab knows where Mat is going.

Hosts better be prepared for wave of enthusiasm, bcos there would be big one entering their pit area.
Also many questions regarding their current and former work, likely touching upon the subject of 24h clunker run’s father: Arvid Åkerlund and fact he sadly would not be able to witness 40th anniversary run.

More details (if any) shall be placed by IRL challenge host

Oh also: Mat registered our team and got busy with paperwork.

Dog duo

There do be response when Rukari took advantage of police-specific parts of his Bricksley.
“Seems like Rukari got into the mood already”
“Ye, i guess…kinda worries me that most of cars are noticeably bigger than what we brought.”
“There is also this cat” Klimentol pointed out cat they passed, mentioned elsewhere in post.

They then came to conclusion that one team is rather well known…but pulled few surprizes.
@Elizipeazie is responsible for one of them: although seeing Valentin on its own is not really that surprizing of sight, fact he was technically part of Shift Happens in this event was.
Although, RK Series Racing did collaborated with said team many, many times back then in rally…

Another big surprize is brought to you by @Madrias. Saying that said surprize also happens to be physically biggest member of this team would def say something, since rest of it isnt exactly small either.

Interactions here were mostly oriented on getting up to date with what was team up to in meantime and also how they managed to find such a big new member.
At some point, it becomes clear that there are in fact two humans here, but Norse happened to be overshadowed by Val’s presence and Takaraya’s existance.
Norse was correctly assumed to be friend of Valentin

---

They had also observed other teams they would be passing by
Indeed, most cars happen to be bigger and most ppl in here would be new faces.
There was some dissapointment as they realized that certain group of Swedes is not present: its indeed obvious that Knug decided that hosting and managing one team is in fact enough, especially bcos Hillbilly Rollers require quite some dedication.

Event happens to have familiar Team Slow present, which prompted another batch of small talk to get up to speed. It is very much rule, but still worth noting that these guys run bare @interior.

---

After team encounters, both of mentioned and unmentioned kind, had happened, these two went to check on Gromadon.
He was asleep.

Rather logically, open for interactions

[Elizipeazie]

@MrdjaNikolen

although seeing Valentin on its own is not really that surprizing of sight, fact he was technically part of Shift Happens in this event was.

TFW when your character apparently is so abnormally tall that they cannot be human anymore and people therefore use “it” for a pronoun lol

[MrdjaNikolen]

Ye, my bad
That was not intentional

[Rudzis]

Part 2: Inspection and prep work

Part1

Part 1 The 2022 Trafikjournalen 24h clunker challenge (PRE-RACE) - #80 by Rudzis

Latvia, 15km outside Rīga, Near a sawmill

Edvīns, Paula and Jēkabs all are on their way to see their chosen car.
Edvīns talking on his phone E: “Hello, we are about 2 minutes away from the sawmill where the car is. Where should we park when we arrive?”
Voice from phone: “There will be a canopy, under which the car is parked. I will come outside to show it to you.”
Edvīns: “Ok see you soon.”
Voice: “Ok.” Hangs up
Paula calls from the rear seat. “Take the next right.”
Jēkabs quickly slows down and sharply turns right. “Good that we are not in a rally stage, otherwise we were in that ditch with such late call.”
Paula: “Sorry.”
Edvīns: sees the parked Schwarzburg “There it is, doesn’t look at all like the pictures. Park next to it!”
Jēkabs: “Ok, captain.”

They park the car, and at the same time around the corner comes a teenage boy in work overalls and with keys in his hand
Edvīns: extending his hand “So you are the owner of this Schwarzburg?”
Seller: Shakes hand “Yeah, time has come to sell it.” Continues to shake hands with Jēkabs and Paula
Edvīns: “So tell me about it a little, It doesn’t really look like in the ad.”
Seller: “Its a 1986 Schwarzburg Aviso 1.8, the last model with RWD, before they went FWD with Aviso II. And the picture in the ad, was from when it was just brought in from Germany”
Edvīns: “So that explains the number plate in picture.”
Jēkabs: “1.8 MPI or the carburetor one?”
Seller: “MPI, this is the one from later in the year when they fully switched to injection an cats.”
Paula: “Is it better?”
J: “Yes and no, the injected ones were more powerful than the carb ones, but the carb ones still had all iron engine and pretty simple build, so they were reliable and simple to work on.” Turns back to the seller after explaining to Paula the difference “Is it the top L version with 120hp?”
Seller: “No the B with 95hp”
Edvīns: “Are these your mods?”
Seller: “Yeah had to freshen it up, looked like a grandpa car, and it owner in Germany actually was a grandpa.”
E: “Does it run? Can we have a test drive?”
Seller: “Sure who is driving?”
J: “That would be me.”
Seller opens the car, hands the key to Jēkabs as all of them climb in the Schwarzburg.
Engine revs up and they drive around the dirt roads in the sawmill territory
Seller: “After I bought it had the brakes replaced and after this winter had to replace the clutch.”
J: After bit of heavy driving “Yeah but seems the rear suspension has seen better days.”
Seller: “Since I decided to sell it I didn’t want to invest in it anymore.”
After the test drive they park it back under the canopy
J: “Why is the oil pressure lamp flickering now at idle?”
Seller: “Don’t worry in the workshop they said it might be just some wiring”
J: “Well ok, but that knocks the price down then, together with the suspension” Turns to Edvīns and Paula who are sitting in the rear seat “What do you say, should we take it?”
E: “There is no real option for now and we don’t have much time left.”
J: Turns back to the seller “Ok, it’s your lucky day, we are taking it, but for a discount.”
Seller: “Well… ok” Shakes hand with Jēkabs
Paula: Takes out the agreed amount of money from her purse “Here you go.” She hands the money to the seller and they shake hands
Seller: “Take care of her.”
E: “We hopefully will.”
All say their goodbyes to the owner
J: “Ok you both take this crapbox and follow me. We are going to my friends dads shop.”

They arrive and see a fairly tall teenager showing them in which garage to park
Once they have parked, Jēkabs introduces all of them
J: “This is our mechanic for the race, Daniels.” turns to Daniels “And these are our driver and logistics specialist, maybe reserve driver”
They all greet each other
Daniels: “So lets see what we are working with.”

They lifted the car and cued the music A-team theme music starts playing

Before

After

What has been done

• Removed all seats except drivers and all the door and other panels.
• Removed fake carbon splitter and spoiler.
• Cut the exhaust and made it into a straight pipe.
• Added a skid plate.
• Added rally lights.
• Replaced tuner wheels with 15" rims and used tires that they found in the workshop.
• Tried to fix the flickering oil pressure light. (unsuccessfully)
• Added names and racing number.
• And most importantly put a “Trafikjournalen” sticker over the “Just racer” one

To be continued…

[karhgath]

Team Prognosis Negative

Chapter III - Getting ready to race

Johan was pretty excited. Anna told her all about the car. Who cares right? They’re gonna be racing!!!

He was getting pumped listening to Ghost in his RS3 on the way up the mountains. He’s gonna kill it on the track!!

He was late tho, getting a speeding ticket on his way to the track. Typical, don’t they have anything better to do?

Anna and Anton were getting the car off the truck when he finally got there.

Number 8! This is gonna be one lucky car. After the trio (and Josef) got through the usual event red tape, they were in and ready to go.

Johan could not contain himself. They are finally here! Anna was chatting up other teams already, and Anton was going through the checklist with Josef.

All Johan had to do was getting ready to drive. He was gonna be first, then Julia and Anton. Hopefully he’d get the car across the finish line.

That punk car will have to be ready to face Johan’s wrath. Some UK posers for sure. Man, a ton of junk all around this event. Look at that Carver, who are they kidding?

“Hey we’ve got some motorsports history right here, we’ll blow you hood right up!”

Johan started strutting around, so sure of himself.

Anton - “So… you still haven’t told him?”

Anna - “Nah, didn’t have the heart to tell him we’ve got basically a crawler wagon.”

Anton - “Yeah, I figured, that’s also why I’ve put a TURBO sticker on the manual locker.”

Anna - “You’re so bad.”

Did she smile? Anton was not sure the ice queen did. He was smiling for sure - Johan’s gonna be in for a surprise! Not that he’s an asshole, but sometimes he’s a bit well…

Johan, far away - “Look at that piece of bubblegum…”

No, no, he really can be an asshole.

Josef - “You’re all good to go! Fueled up, I reinforced the rear axle a bit, but the check engine is still on tho.”

Anton tried to call on Johan. He has to come back eventually, if he’s not thrown out or get in a fistfight. He signaled Anna they were A-Ok, but she was busy looking at the worn out Ambrosia from Trafikjournalen.

Anton was focused and trying not to get distracted.

Let’s roll. Hopefully with Johan in the driver’s seat.

[Knugcab]

PART 1
NOON-4 PM

"Hello and welcome to the start of a very special 24 hours of clunkers race, because this year is actually the 40th anniversary of the race. We can see already at the start that some cars have problems with the traction, mainly team Shine Quartz with their Przenopewien, and team If it’s not punk, it’s junk with their Cambridge, though when it comes to those crazy brits you’ll never now if the spinning wheels at the start was erratic driving or an attempt to show off. Team SCS and their FM also does a less than brilliant start, albeit with a little less wheelspin. It seems like if Team Rogue traders have a kind of hard time wrestling their large pickup around the track, and we now encounter the first car with problems, the Saguaro belonging to team Mravolinski-Chitco that is slowly sputtering around the track, intermittently dying. It turns out that there is a dodgy soldering in the fuel pump relay, so they stay for quite a long time in the pits, resoldering the relay. While Team Oxracers in their Seongu barely manages to dodge the guardrail, Team Bubblegum in their Mons scrapes it but can keep driving afterwards.

I don’t know, but all of a sudden many participants seems to have trouble with a certain corner, since both Team Slow in their Schnell and Team Shine Quartz in their Przenopewien are doing some wild skids there and barely avoids the guardrail, but… OH, HOLY SHIT, LOOK AT TEAM SHIFT HAPPENS AND THEIR BRICKSLEY, seems like Rukari took that corner WAAAY too wide, drifting with the tail hard into the guardrail. Ouch, seems like the hit was so hard it made the rear door fly open, with a flapping rear door he is heading to the pits where it will take some serious panel beating to be able to close it again, so count with Team Shift happens being away for a while. And… OH, the Bricksley has just about left before the Saguaro belonging to team Mravolinski-Chitco kisses the guardrail in the same place, with Team Desert Scavengers having to swerve so hard that they spin around with their Union, however, both cars can keep driving afterwards. I don’t really know what the problem is here because now Team Oxracers have also planted their Seongu in the same guardrail, though without any major damage.

The crazy brits in their Cambridge, we’re still unsure if they drift as they do in the corners to show off or because they are too hot-blooded but the Cambridge spins around anyway, which causes them to lose some time. Even more time is lost for Team Slow in their Schnell after scraping the guardrail, however, the car seems to survive it just fine. We get a report from Team SCS that their FM is overheating, they are trying to find the cause in the pits but it remains a mystery and they get back on the track as soon as it has cooled down. The next team to enter the pits are Shine Quartz in their Przenopewien, since there has been a smell of burned oil inside the car. It turns out that someone had forgotten to screw on the oil filler cap tight enough, luckily it is still in the engine bay so when they have refitted it, the Przenopewien is ready to go again. Team Prognosis Negative touches some guardrail with their Régal, which means that the Saguaro and the Mons has to swerve to avoid it, but both drivers loses control, albeit without crashing into anything. Not as lucky is Team Oxracers in their Seongu, hitting the guardrail soon afterwards. However, no visit in the pits for either Oxracers or Prognosis Negative.

Once again the Cambridge is spinning around on the track, I don’t know if they mistook this for actual banger racing, but Team Slow in their Schnell and Team SCS in their FM has to swerve for the spinning Cambridge, though managing to remain in control. That does not help Team Slow, however, that soon afterwards is hit from behind by Team Postgraduate Psychosis Callahan. The Schnell keeps driving but the hood flies open on the Callahan, which means that it takes some good old panel beating in the pits before it can open and close somewhat like usual again. Having to swerve to not get into the mess, Team Bubblegum and Team Schrott racing manages to keep in control, it’s worse for Team Desert scavengers that is spinning around with their Union. A while later, it seems like Filip Andersson in our own team gets a little bit too confident in handling the nose-heavy Saarland that does a wide skid through a corner.

There is some nudging of the guardrail by the Przenopewien, meaning that Team Bubblegum slows down a bit with their pink yank-tank to not hit the Przenopewien from behind. Unfortunately, the Mons is instead hit by the Callahan from behind. The Mons stops, but after some cranking it’s good to go again, but the Callahan has to go to the pits for some duct taping of its trashed bumper. We don’t know if that somehow made the Mons driver nervous because the driving has now been less than stellar for a while.

Team SCS with their FM is getting a bit too confident, barely avoiding the guardrail, while a broken flexdisc on the propshaft has sent Team Spy Kids’ Rosewood to the pits where it stays for a while. Once again, it seems like handling Team Rogue Traders’ large pickup on this track ain’t the easiest task because it has done some less than ideal laps lately. The Saguaro is going to the pits for some strange behaviour while braking. It turns out that one of the front brake discs have cracked around the hub, and since they haven’t been able to source spare parts, team Mravolinski-Chitco decides that they are done with the race for this year now. The Schwarzburg belonging to team Schrott Racing is doing some very wide turns in the corners now, with gravel flying from the rear wheels. The thirsty Mons is already going in for its first refuelling.

Not very surprisingly, the next car…eh, truck, going to the pits for refuelling is the WRK pickup. The Union bites the guardrail which means that the Callahan has to swerve to avoid it, albeit is still kept under control.

It has been quite calm now for a while expect for some more show-off-drifting by the crazy brits and their Cambridge. Two more thirsty cars are going in to refuel, the Rosewood and the Union."

CURRENT STANDINGS

1. Team Oxracers / #41 Seongu (@AndiD ) - Lap # 286
2. Team Septic tank / #404 Sandhurst (@stm316 ) - Lap # 266
3. Team Slow / #91 Schnell (@interior ) - Lap #259
4. Team If it’s not punk it’s junk / #16 Cambridge (@Maverick74 ) - Lap # 259
5. Team SCS / #69 FM (@Jaimz68 ) - Lap # 257
6. Team Prognosis Negative / #8 Régal (@karhgath ) - Lap # 256
7. Team Postgraduate Psychosis / #66 Callahan (@Texaslav ) - Lap # 256
8. Team Trafikjournalen / #23 Saarland (@Knugcab ) - Lap # 251
9. Team Schrott Racing / #13 Schwarzburg (@Rudzis ) - Lap # 250
10. Team Spy Kids / #42 Rosewood (@SheikhMansour ) - Lap # 241
11. Team Rogue Traders / #722 WRK (@Fayeding_Spray ) - Lap # 241
12. Team Desert Scavengers / #47 Union (@TheYugo45GV ) - Lap # 240
13. Team Bubblegum / #113 Mons (@cake_ape ) - Lap # 238
14. Team Shine Quartz / #98 Przenopewien (@Vento ) - Lap # 237
15. Team Shift Happens / #357 Bricksley (@Madrias /@Elizipeazie ) - Lap # 227
16. Team Mravolinski-Chitco / #90 Saguario (@MrdjaNikolen ) - Lap # 123 (DNF)

(Note: When I have seen no sign of a claimed starting number I have randomly assigned one, and if someone got the wrong one I must have missed that, if that’s the case, I apologize)

[Madrias]

Team Shift Happens

Previous Part - The Pits / Test Drive
Previous Part - Meeting the Hosts (Written by Elizipeazie, collab with Knugcab)

---

12:00 Local Time

Rukari sat behind the wheel, V8 already growling up front, resonating through the exhaust and burbling behind him. To his left, he saw the Magistrate of Team Desert Scavengers, the two police cars ready to go on a 24 hour hot pursuit.

The race started, and Rukari stomped on the gas pedal, the 400 cubic inch V8 waking with a savage roar as the car surged forward, threatening to give the pickup truck of Team Rogue Traders a bump. They darted out of the way, letting the Bricksley thunder its way forward into the pack. Once the car was clear of any danger, Rukari turned on the light bar and let the siren wail.

A few laps went by, with only the Saguaro having to go to the pits to fix their fuel pump.

Things were going “well” until Rukari tried to pass a car going into a corner, the back end breaking loose and drifting wide. The engine snarled as Rukari tried to drive out of the skid, only to slam into the guardrail with the passenger side of the trunk. The car was kicked sideways with the door flapping open, doing a full 360 degree revolution before Rukari caught it.

“To the pits, Rukari, that door needs to be fixed,” Malavera ordered.

As the Bricksley rolled into the pit lane, the engine was shut down (along with the lights and siren, for the moment) and the team got to work mending the damaged door. Which really meant that Malavera was “straightening” the door frame with the hammer, while Takaraya flattened out the sheet metal edge of the door. After the door was slammed shut, Kivenaal sparked up the oxy-acetylene torch and proceeded to weld the passenger side rear door shut.

“There. It’s fixed. Go drive it around to cool the welds off,” Kivenaal said, the crew getting out of the way in a hurry to let Rukari return to the track.

Rukari, as a result, floored it hard, the engine almost howling as he touched 6000 RPM before upshifting to Drive, the lights flashing and the siren screaming once again. The car surged onto the track in a flurry of wheelspin, joining just in time to witness the Cambridge spinning out, the Schnell and the FM having to swerve, and then the Schnell getting rear-ended by the Callahan. Team Bubblegum and Schrott Racing manage to avoid the chaos, while the Von Heislingburg behind the wheel of the Magistrate spun out in the process. There was almost contact as the brutal Grand Warden surged by the spinning Magistrate, with Rukari witnessing the Saarland making the corner - barely - in the rear view mirror.

Up ahead, the pink barge driven by Team Bubblegum piled on the brakes to avoid rear-ending another car, causing the Mons to swerve to avoid it, and the Callahan to drive into it. Rukari heard the engine fire back up on the Mons, and saw the Callahan dragging half of a bumper toward the pit lane.

Takaraya looked out over the track, watching the various cars as they raced, seeing Rukari was at least managing to keep out of trouble for now. However, the Franklin-Marshal of Team SCS dances on the razor’s edge of hitting the guardrail, while the Rosewood of Team Spy Kids arrives in the pits with driveshaft issues. The Rogue Traders manage to keep on moving, but seemed, at least to Takaraya, to be more of a mobile obstacle and less of a racing vehicle. Then the Saguaro arrived in the pit lane with brake issues, only to discover they had no brake rotors to replace them.

Kayden asked Nova, “Do you know if Bricksley brake rotors would fit on the Saguaro T-REE?”

“I do know. The rotors will not fit,” Nova replied.

Rukari watched as the Schwarzburg slid wide in the corners, kicking up gravel as it went. As the Mons disappeared up the pit lane for refuelling, Rukari checked the gauge, made one more lap, then joined it. (Note: I was informed that, yes, I do refuel here.)

It was Norse who grabbed the gas cans and started filling the tank. After the car was filled up, and Rukari left the lane to return to the track, Norse handed the cans off to Kivenaal to get them refueled.

Soon after, the WRK pickup joined the pit lane for a fuel stop.

Rukari watched as the Magistrate clipped the guardrail, forcing the Callahan to avoid it. The rest of the four hour stint behind the wheel was almost uneventful, other than the Cambridge drifting around, and the Rosewood, followed by the Union Magistrate, going in for a refueling stop.

“So, Rukari,” Kayden called over the radio, “you keep that car together for two more hours and we’ll swap drivers.”

“You take seat next?” Rukari asked.

“That’s the plan,” Kayden replied.

[MrdjaNikolen]

Team Mravolinski-Chitco
Race: We got new car

Like first post and unlike the rest, this will be posted in its full glory thats immidiate to see.

Quint has decided to get first stint of driving.
Start has happened and everyone was enthusiastic to go, in some cases indeed followed by wheelspin bcos of lot of power…not really applicable in our case but still.
Needless to say, Quint wasnt exactly complaining to this situation, so far no crashes.

Soon enough, one car on track had shown signs of struggle, which may be viewed as good opportunity for us to overtake someone…if it wasnt for fact car in question was our T-REE.
Drive was safe and slow, tad bit too slow as many others zoomed past us, so Quint steered into pits.

There, rest of team had entered the car and its engine to find out what was the problem.
Gearbox was ruled out, as that certainly wouldnt result in engine not working.
They had cranked the engine…nothing.
Looked if issue was not related to underside, meaning Aydar needed to use his strength to good use…again.
This happened to be done just right, so actual problem removed itself for a bit, making fuel getting to engine and engine starting!

Yay…what?
Soon after Aydar put car down…it stopped.
Lifted it up…one crank later by Quint (still in driver seat) engine works.

Process was done few more times, everyone was puzzled.
Omega suggested keeping track of fuel in carburetors in some way…which lead us to good track of identifying problem.

Fuel lines were alright and fuel pump itself was checked…nothing.
Mat had idea of looking at relays. Bingo, one of relays was in bad condition and needed resoldering.
This was quick, but obviously troubleshooting took some time.

Quint took front seat to some scenes on track, while others observed from pits.
This now did started to seem like previous editions of 24h Clunkers yours truly enjoyed reading

As for certain troubles in specific corner, Quint had recollected some stuff based both on his time behind wheel and live feed of hosts.
Quint already knew there was some decent amount of oil on track or atleast to him it seemed like oil.
At one point, he would have opportunity to go through what hosts had commented.
“Stupid Poles” he exclaimed after learning of their oil cap trouble, “some of their oil must have came onto the track!
That was likely cause of us losing control there”
But evidence would be too compromised to get to conclusion.
Ofc this is just a theory.

To get back on chronological order, we get back to point where mad lad Rukari had shown this potential spillage doesnt fit his driving.
That seemed hard, sounded hard and prob felt hard, indicated by fact one of doors had opened due to force.
What concerned Quint more tho, was fact he was approaching rear part of Bricksley…fast.
Loud bang had been felt and heard as he slammed into guardrail, carrying some of leftover Bricksley’s paint along.
This partially affected front right wheel assembly, which in hindsight contributed to our next unfortunate event.
We are yet to exit the trouble as Desert Scavengers had almost scavenged rear end of our wagon.

Now we are back to witnessing usual spinouts and occasional crashes without too much involvement.

Johan in Regal had overestimated handling prowess of his “piece of motorsport history”
At that moment, his skill had quite the Negative Prognosis, as poor kiddo was yet to be aware of actual status of his vehicle.
This meant another scary moment for Quint potentially involving much bigger vehicle, this time pink Mons.
@cake_ape’s entry clearly cut costs on painter and for small price of two beer cases deployed already drunk Marie from Hillbilly Rollers - At least that was remark of dogs that had opportunity to meet this individual.
This however went without contact

If its not punk its junk is clearly showing skill in lack of control over the vehicle, annoying some other drivers but also not crashing.
Quint is out of mess so far, managing to drive vehicle without too much issue.
Or so he thought…

At one point he realized that brake of front left seems to not really work: braking now made car noticeably turn left, as if somehow right side brakes less intensely than right
Grip is not problem as almost-100kg-Quint is on left side of the car.
He continued going, but at some point he was called into pits.

Diagnosis was clear upon removing the front right wheel.
Brake disc had cracked beyond repair and upon detailed search, they found no spare.

“Surely it should be possible to continue?”
“We can remove that disc, but you arent going to be able to brake on that side.
Adjusting may be possible but i dont think that would be advisable to do here”
Union bangs on guardrail to drive point home, bcos convenient timing rules.
“It would be too dangerous and it doesnt seem like our chances would be any better.
Besides…we may find some use of it as it is
Some cheap brake disc later and some more detailed checkup may result in perfectly driveable vehicle”

Mat: We came here to drive
Klimentol: Then by all means do so
Brake assembly on that side was disconnected and wheel put back
If you can handle that for 2 laps, then we shall continue.
Mat went behind the wheel and drove scariest two laps in his life.
White as sheet, he looked at pair. Omega was too scared to drive and wasnt willing to risk her boyfriend.
Mat agreed it was scary and even if, it would be too much to drive further in this state…completely by himself.

---

One girl cried at her home bcos her favourite team ended the race
But she found out there are two more furry-filled cute animals, so…sadness persisted for about two minutes.
Poor parents, seems that girl isnt going to sleep that easily and might let her be while they are going to bed.

Manager was like “Hah” and opened another beer.
Fart happened
Life is cool

As for us?
Team will be willing to help others and kinda root for others
Most of team cheered for Shift Happens
Mat just hoped that, on this anniversary, hosts are going to finish
He who is no more with us…would certainly approve of that.

[Jaimz68]

Tesm SCS race part 1
Crackle - Spanners, how’s it going?
Spanners - Handling like an absolute dream…except for the start…seemed to bog down…WOW this things good!
Crackle - Bit of a problem, mate.
Spanners - Yeah, temps are going through the roof…probably the thermostat not opening…we’ll bin it when I come in…it’ll take a while to cool down though. Really wish I’d thought about some waterless coolant. Would only have cost about 80 quid!
Crackle - Yeeeeah…that’s not the problem.
Spanners - So what is? Can you hear something as I go past?
Crackle - No…Snap’s the problem!
Spanners - Why? He’s on the next shift.
Crackle - Not any more…
Spanners - You swapping around?
Mopey - HE GOT CAUGHT PISSING AGAINST A WALL AND SECURITY GRABBED H…
Crackle - He’s in a bit of bother…local plod have him in the back of their car.
Spanners - He’s getting released though?
Miopey - NOT TONIGHT HE ISN…
Crackle - Erm…Nope!
Spanners - BOLLOCKS…That means that…
Mopey - I GET TO DRIVE, I GET TO DRIVE!!!
Spanners - Yeah, you do…YOU get to drive the DEATHTRAP!
Mopey - Oh…

[Elizipeazie]

Team Shift Happens; the human side of things

Since this part is not immediately race-relevant, i have decided that i shall hide the segment in this-here dropdown. It is not critical for those in the pit lane to read, though i’m not stopping anyone ;P
Information contained herein may be referenced in future pit-lane segments.

The actual RP segment.

By the time the race started, Norse had already joined the other seven team members in the garage, the eighth being Rukari at the start line with the Bricksley.
Oddly enough, the start and first few laps weren’t as exciting to Norse and Valentin as one might expect.
As such, the race, to the humans, settled into a rather noisy borefest, leading to both Valentin and Norse to do different things.

“Since we’ve got nothing to do, i might as well head out back and get Robert out of his little hidey-hole somehow.”, Valentin said, before getting up from his laughably undersized lawn-chair, grunting.
“Oh! I wanna see that project for real!”, Norse eagerly said, already back up on his feet.
Takaraya also took note and looked over at the two humans.
“Let me help in getting it out.”, he quipped, following the others out the back and across the parking lot to the containers delivered this morning, both of which still open with one of them empty.
“Must’ve forgotten to close it up earlier…”,Valentin mumbled as he led the other two over to his university project vehicle.

Once again, the familiar sight of orange presented itself in the dark chasm of the container.
“How are you gonna get it out, then?”, Norse inquired, breaking Valentin’s though process on the same issue.
“Hold on a second…”, Valentin countered, as the parking lot went silent for a while.
“Right… you think you can pull 2.4 metric tons?” Valentin asked Takaraya.
“If I had my combat boots, I’d have more confidence in doing so. With my steel-toed work boots? I’m lacking grip, but willing to try.”, he replied, heading back to get the tow chains.

Meanwhile, Valentin and Norse (read: mostly Norse) went to work removing the tie-down straps from the car. By the time they were done, Takaraya returned, hooking up the tow-chain to the back, having to search for the hook for a bit.

“Now… the steering geometry is kind of… shit because of how heavy it is, so i’m gonna start it, enabling the power steering. Once i’m out of the container, you can pull.”, Valentin explained, as he opened the driver door just far enough to be able to reach in, releasing the parking brake, followed by him pressing the power-button on the dash-mounted computer.

In the back, two fans mounted in the space once occupied by the rear window start spooling, sending loads of airflow out the back, followed by what sounds like a gas stove being lit, transitioning to an aggressive, though muffled, blowtorch-like sound.
Valentin quickly makes his way out of the container, after which Takaraya tows the vehicle into the open parking lot, having visible difficulty in getting grip on the floor.

note: car shown as of April 2023, current appearance may differ

“Thank you, then.”, Valentin said once the car was out on the parking lot, as he closed the container back up this time around. Norse took the time to get the chain unhooked again, promptly followed by Takaraya coiling up the chain again. Not long after, he got curious, asking a number of questions on why Valentin made the choices he did.
Answering them was no issue, as steaming still took a few moments before the car would be mobile, though eventually they headed back to the garage, with Takaraya walking and Norse joining Valentin in the car, thus becoming the first passenger of Robert the second.

The drive was short, lasting all of fifteen seconds, but otherwise flawless as the car was parked up behind the Shift Happens garage near the entry door, where the car was then shut down again.

After that, the two humans went back in to join the others in watching the race unfold.

[karhgath]

Team Prognosis Negative

Chapter IV - It’s time to kickass and chew that bubblegum car

---

Anton, on radio - "And we're off!"

Anna, on radio - “Go get 'em!”

For Johan, that was just static. The adrenaline was pouring in. So much that he stalled. Or so he thought, but the clutch was so smooth on that gearbox that he was able to hold it. Not his best start. Well, it was his first start ever if someone wants to be pedantic. At this point he did not care about this distinction - he was racing!!

He overtook that pink monstrosity on the first turn. Then number #23 soon after. #42. #722. Numbers became a blur. That bubblegum car again. And again about 18 laps later. It was easy to base progress on a rapid pink blur.

All he was hearing on the radio was static. Noise.

Anton, on radio - “Don’t push that rear suspension too much.”

Anna, on radio - “You got up another place, awesome!”

Mom - “Spaghetti’s ready!”

He snapped out of it. He looked at the pacing. Lap 80. He’s 9th.

Bubblegum again.

Johan, on radio - “This ride is so smooth! It handles like a charm. Steering is like butter, temps are good, gearbox is golden. Imma push it a bit more, tired or seeing pink in front”

Anton, on radio - “No need to push it, he’s a few laps behind you, he’ll let you pass…”

Johan, on radio - “Come on, I can do it! I’ll hit that turbo button!”

Anton, on radio - “No need, it’s not even coughing in the background no need to wear out the, err, turbo.”

Johan, on radio - “Still gonna push… yes, got through!!! Wohooooo! crash and grinding noise”

Anna, on radio - “Johan!?!? JOHAN!?!”

Johan, on radio - “I am good… sorry, took the turn wide and hit something. I am good. Should have seen the cars behind me, haha, losers.”

---

in the pits

Anton, looking at Anna - “How many ‘I am sorry’ baskets are we going to need after all this?”

Anna, oblivious to the joke - “I do not like gift baskets.”

---

back in the car

Johan slowed down a bit after that mishap, but this was a true race car breed. He was stalling a bit tho, he passed over pink a few more times, but he could not make much progress. Then all hell seemed to break loose.

That punk car had a few laps ahead, but had multiple incidents so he was able to pass him a few times, but not enough to get ahead - it was quite fast. #66 was well ahead in laps, but Johan passed it as it was getting in the pits. Then the official Trafikjournalen car was a pesky beast, staying just ahead - until he swerved off road and finally Johan got ahead.

Anton, on radio - “6th!!! You are goddamn sixth!!!”

Anna, on radio - “Be careful, just heard the Saguario is out of the race, don’t do anything stupid.”

Johan, on radio - “Yeah yeah, you know me.”

Anna, on radio - “That is exactly the issue here.”

Johan could hear Josef to the static ‘Yeah, he’s punk’. He’ll show them.

---

in the pits

Anna approached Team Mravolinski-Chitco stand. She dragged Josef with them, trying to find out if they could help at all, but unfortunately it was a lost cause. The team seemed devastated, she thought. A real bummer.

Josef got out a bottle of Vana Tallinn, an Estonian liquor and offered it to the team. He nodded and left with Anna.

Anna, muttering to herself - “So we’ll be out of baskets and liquor by the end of this…”

---

back in the car

It was pretty uneventful in the Régal (4x4, not that Johan would know), but it was chaos around him. He got a good rhythm going.

Anton, on radio - “We’re approaching the 4 hour mark, you all good? Want to switch up?”

Johan, on radio - “No, everything’s good, still a third of the tank left, got past bubblegum again, am I still 6th?”

Anna, on radio - “Yes! Started lap #256. Keep going like that, no more mistakes.”

Johan, on radio - “Damn, can’t get through to the FM, he’s always a step ahead of me. Oh shit… I can see the boyracer Callahan behind me, hell, I thought he was well behind with his pitstop… I’ll have to push it some more.”

Anna and Anton, in unison, over the radio - “No!!!”

to be continued

[Maverick74]

Team If It's Not Punk It's Junk

Search & Destroy

Race Day

After a couple of weeks preparing the car, most of which was spent doing up the theme, the band finds themselves at the track. Fern is suiting up for the first four hour stint, Ox is hastily taping up the mess of wires that make up the dashboard, and Alyssa is helping Iggy unsuccessfully make the Wyvern’s carburetor idle properly. He ushers Alyssa aside before slamming down the hood
“Bollocks to all 'hat! Bloody 'hing buggered up good like! Fern, you just 'ave to give it the wellies, aye?”
“Sounds good, old man. Ox, you about finished up in there? Race is about to start.”
Ox crawls out from under the dash, stretching to get the kinks out his back from the awkward angle
“Yep. Certainly ain’t perfect, but it might hold up.”
“At least it looks bloody brilliant,” Alyssa pipes up, beaming at their handywork
“Aye, ou lot have done a bang up job. Now et on ot there and put on a show!”

Fern clambers behind the wheel, getting the Cambridge started after a few reluctant cranks. She soon discovers that a slightly dodgey clutch and cankerous carb makes for a difficult start
“Bugger all!” she shouts, dumping the clutch and roasting up the rear tires leaving the pits. It doesn’t take long into the race to find out the suspension is utterly knackered. The car is loose as a goose, the rear of the car not always obeying what the front is asking it to do. But Fern, not one to back down from a challenge, pushes through the quirks, doing her best to keep it under control. And she does a decent job at it

Up until she doesn’t. Going into turn three, the left rear brake caliper seizes up, throwing the car into a 180 degree spin and stalling the engine.
“Bloody hell,” Fern exclaims, a bit rattled “That was bit of a kip!” The Cambridge protests about getting going again but eventually does so. Once again giving the old bird the beans, Fern rejoins the race a bit more showy than intended. About an hour goes by, Fern soldiering on bravely.

“Aight, I think I’m getting a feel for the old bird,” she thought to herself. It’s about this time that rear brake heard her thoughts and decided to lock up again. But this time the car stayed on the track and the view through the windshield is full of of incoming cars.
“OH BUGGER!” Fern yelps out as she clutches the steering wheel. After an orchestra of screeching tires and crunching metal, she opens her eyes to find herself still intact. A glance in the rear view mirror shows that some of the competitors didn’t have quite the same experience. Once back pointing the correct direction, she sputters past the Schnell with Team Postgaduate up their trumpet. “Sorry about that!” she yells out the window as she goes past.

The rest of her stint goes by mostly uneventful, with nothing more than one or two exuberant maneuvers to showcase the Wyvern’s schizophrenia. Fern pulls in for the first driver change of the day, finding their pits empty. She gets out of the car, finding Alyssa snoozing away in the back of their van.
“Oi!” Fern says, nudging her friend awake “What is all this then? We be in the middle of a race and ye be taking a nap? Where’s the old man? And Ox? It’s his turn to drive, you know?”
“Eh, it’s not been quite as exciting here in the pits,” Alyssa answers groggily “Certainly not as exciting a time as you been having, what with all the pirouettes you’ve been showboating. What’s that all about?”
“Err, that’s all the car. Thing belongs in a skip. It’s a bit…temperamental. But never mind that, where are the others?”
“Well, I don’t know as to where your pops buggered off to. But Ox went to the cantina for his afternoon tea. Reckon he’s still there.”
Sure enough, Fern finds Ox at a table near the concessions stand, sipping on a paper cup and quietly watching the race go on. Upon seeing his friend stride up to him, he puts the cup down and states, “Be that time, is it?”
“You’re bloody right it’s that time! Some pit crew you lot are, be like herding cats.” Fern rolls her eyes and sighs “Anyways, best I tell you, that alleged car of yours certainly seems to have a mind of it’s own. Be all over the track eight ways to Sunday. Think something in the suspension may have went of holiday. And the carburetor has the fits. Oh, yeah, almost forgot, the bloody rear brakes like to punt you off! But apart from the it be a peach.”
Ox contemplates this for a moment before shrugging. “Right. Guess I best be off then, yeah?”

[interior]

Team Slow
Part 3-The Race. Time to shine.

Previous parts.

Team Slow, The return
Part 0, The Beginning to the hopeful finale of the event.
The 2022 Trafikjournalen 24h clunker challenge (NOON - 4PM) - #34 by interior

Part 1, It will make it to the races, maybe?
The 2022 Trafikjournalen 24h clunker challenge (NOON - 4PM) - #72 by interior

Part 2, To the races! (And Beyond)
The 2022 Trafikjournalen 24h clunker challenge (NOON - 4PM) - #104 by interior

---

As the driver for this section of the race, Izzy, shoves it into gear and starts racing, Trying to minimise as much use of the brakes as possible due to their sticky nature, Just moments on a corner, the rear end of the vehicle starts swinging out, she tried to control it but just about barely hits the guardrail.

“That was close”, as she straightens the vehicle and gets the car more onto the road than the edge.

As Matt watches from the pits, he radios Izzy and asks "Did the car get destroyed yet, and she responds with "No, but, that Bricksley though had slammed hard into the guardrail.

After some time, Izzy rushes to pick up the CB radio to say “The team with the- Shit! I got fucking rear ended!” She ends up dropping the CB radio mic piece and then downshifts and picks up some speed, The damages aren’t stopping the car from becoming a doorstop. Although an expensive one at that.

After picking up speed, she continues racing although trying to keep the car straight, although an minimal offset. Izzy then picks up the cb radio piece and says “We’re in third! Lets go” and then Matt replies with “Not first place, but it’s still top 3. Keep it going! Maybe we’d survive the whole race, Although that Przeno-something really likes that guardrail.”

Izzy starts to concentrate even more on the road, but the ECU issues are starting to arise during the race, such as misfiring and power loss, but it’s not stopping her from continuing the race with the car during this run. Matt then radios again, “Those brakes, get into the pits. NOW!” he says with an concerned tone than usual. Izzy then drives into the pits, and asks teams for some brake calipers.

Matt: I’ll seal up the power steering leak and you go ask for some calipers, WD40 even?, alright?

Izzy: Got it. That Saguario didn’t last long. That team had potential too.

Matt: This time i’m driving after those brakes are replaced and you do mechanicals on the next stage. You did good, could be better.

(OOC: Anyone have a spare set of brake calipers?)