The 2024 Trafikjournalen 24h of clunkers (RACE OVER!)

Time to Shine…

Daniel: Good news! Fifth place overall!

Mikko: Yeah…and that’s with Akseli behind the wheel? Not bad at all, what time is it?

Daniel: It’s 8 P.M. man, it’s your time to shine…show those freaks from before what you can actually do! You can do this!

Mikko: Woah, woah, calm down. You already know, they’re gonna burn…

Mikko would grab the radio, and immediately shout at Akseli, who was driving.

Mikko: AKSELI! Aja varikkokäytävälle nyt! On minun vitun vuoroni tuhota tuo sinitukkainen friikki ja nuo japanilaiset idiootit!

Akseli: Yes, yes, you’re the boss…

Mikko: And Henrik! Get me a case of energy drinks, a pack of cigarettes, and my helmet, NOW!

Mikko, after having gotten ready, looking way more like a professional than the rest of the racers, with his racing suit, matched helmet, and the air of a real rally driver, quickly ran up to the approaching Sedlak, forcefully pulling out Akseli out of the seat before jumping in. Strapping his harnesses, he put the Sedlak Silva in first gear, and before you knew it, with an extremely quick start, like a real rally driver, Mikko was out of the pit lane as quick as he pulled in. (5 Aggression 5 Skill incoming)

Akseli: Ouch! You hurt me, you fucker!

3 Likes
  • HeltR SkeltR & Marcel pit, 3:12 PM

Romain runs to Mary :
" - Are you okay ? That was a pretty heavy hit back there on that guardrail !"
" - Yeah I think so… It’s such a mess, sometimes I barely know what I’m doing… Where is he ?" she looks around for her father. “he must be angry or something… I think I’ll be better on the track, I’ll try not to break the car more !”
" - Don’t worry about Robert, we told him to get some sleep just before you hit that rail, he doesn’t know about it^^"
She smiles at him and goes back to race.

  • 5:55 PM

Mary, exhausted, enters the pit area with apprehension. Her father is waiting for her and do a full check-up before Rémi takes over.
" - The brakes aren’t good anymore, they feel weird, I don’t know what happens…"
" - What ? You brake too much ! That’s what happens ! Now I gotta fix this and it’ll take ages ! Get out of here. I wasn’t 15th in my dreams !" and he starts fixing the car. Romain gets near him and tries to calm him :
" - Robert, you know, you could be a bit nicer to your daughter, she just drove 6 hours straight… For her first time, you know it’s not…"
Robert opens the overheated brake fluid tank just near Romain to cut his speech.
" - I’m just stressed okay ? I… I’ll catch with her later, when I’ll be more confident in this race. Here, help me, get in the car and pump those brakes." He discretly opens a beer and tries to heal himself with his poison.
Meanwhile, Rémi tries to comfort Mary, but he has to take over, and soon enough he takes place in the driver’s seat. He takes the time to kiss his necklace and takes off. The engine stutters a bit as Rémi leaves the pit.
" - Oh ! I’ll have to check that carb on the next stop, if THIS TIME I don’t have a fluid circuit to fill !"
Romain looks at him with a frowning face.
" - But… Are you drinking again ?? Jesus, Robert ! I thought we were clear about that ! I won’t be able to trust you after a while… You’ll have to sleep again when it’s my turn to drive and I won’t have a good mechanic…"
" - Well Mary will…"
" - Mary will be asleep at that time ! Remember she’s still a child, kind of ?.. Hey you know what, do as you want, it’s YOUR dream you’re sinking after all. I’ll be in the backroom, I need some calm. Just come if you need me."
And on the track :
" - Damn I hope that microdosing wasn’t macrodosing, that sunset is stunning…"

to be continued

3 Likes

Also, if you have any strategy plans for next round, as last time, DM me them before monday 21st of october, 5 PM CEST.

1 Like

Big crash = Places lost.
We need to bring the Vortex to the top. We go All-In, no balls, all risks. We will get back on top.

2 Likes

Team Highway Hooligans

Race, 4 PM to 8 PM


Jake grimaces slightly as, toward the end of 4:30 PM, he loses a bit of control of the ass-happy Bricksley and scuffs the guardrail, shaving off a little more of the dirt, grime, and faded-piss-yellow paint from the car. It had been a relatively calm half hour up until that point, and the car seemed to be running just fine for now, so Jake just shrugs it off and keeps going.

Nearing 6 PM, Jake does it again, this time bouncing off of the barrier near the pit-lane entry and getting fired back out onto the track, the bumper now a little bit more bent. A lap later, Jake brings it in for a driver change.

“Be careful, Cody, it’s ass-happy and it’ll get away from you quick,” Jake warns.

“Just means it’s more momentum to hit other cars with,” Cody quips back, sliding into the driver’s seat and doing a squeal-and-peel out of the pit lane, leaving a drifting cloud of smoke for the other teams to deal with.

Of course, 30 minutes later, Cody finds out that Jake wasn’t joking, nearly saves it but overcorrects, and stuffs the front quarter with the broken light into the guardrail, and in the process, breaks the hood latch. As the hood drifts skyward on the straightaway, Cody slams on the brakes, slamming the hood shut and simultaneously brake-checking the DAW behind him. This cycle continues for another few laps, up until the car loses it again, bangs into the guardrail again, and ends up with the hood now blocking Cody’s view.

In the pits, there was an argument regarding how to fix the hood, keep it still functional as a hood, and finally, whether they actually needed the hood.

“Just take the fuckin’ thing off! We don’t need it, it’s excess weight, and I can’t see shit with the god-damn scoops or the fuckin’ thing flopping up in my face! It’ll be way worse if the fuckin’ thing flops open and busts the windshield, so TAKE IT OFF!!!” Cody yells.

While Scott checks through the rulebook to see if the car needed to keep the hood on for the whole race, Jake and Trevor dismount the hood and set it aside, then send the car out to keep racing while they make some “adjustments” in case the hood has to go back on.

Cody grins as he glances over at the exposed engine on the straightaway, stomping on the accelerator and watching the five-cylinder, turbocharged, and intercooled beast straining against the engine mounts, rocked over a few degrees under hard acceleration. The car seems no better or worse for having the hood removed - it’s still slow, unruly, and tail-happy - but at least Cody can see most of what he’s about to hit.

We say most because the Mishuto plays some guardrail pinball and flings debris at the Bricksley, which bounces off of the valve cover and hits the roof, causing Cody to brake-check the Torrento and flip the birdie at “that idiot in the Mishuto” for throwing trash at him.


Strategy: Keep things pretty much the same. Currently, seeing if we can get away with not needing to bolt the hood back on.

Car: Starting to look like a crumpled beer can.

3 Likes

Y.E.A.R.

Description of the Team

Last Episode (“To finish first, first you have to finish”)

Race Episode 2:"Nunavummiut Wonders, María's Nightmare, and a Happy Birthday"

Around 4 PM.

As Ryoga drove, Alexandra, a side member from the Speed Freaks, joined in to conversate just as our Canadian Wonder came along to drive.

The Canadian Wonder, otherwise known as Catherine Jansdatter, got in the car by 4 PM. It took her quite a struggle just to get in the car itself. But still, it seemed like it was all smooth sailing for Y.E.A.R…

Until Catherine would immediately almost eliminate the clean runs by nearly crashing head on with the ARVA. Lucky, her cautious driving was paying off, and she stopped in time, but that wouldn’t avoid her getting scolded by María…

María:“What the Hell was that ?!?”
Catherine:“Sorry, I was trying to avoid a wreck. Luckily I did avoid the wreck. No damages !”
María:“Good, Good, don’t get me any more stressed, Cath, so please just make it to 8 with the car in one piece.”

However, just as dusk began to fall, luck seemed to turn around briefly for our favorite Yumeisotitanian Team. Because, Ángel, who was in charge of the radio after María’s sickness worsened (she went to the bathroom for a while during this time, yet it didn’t solve the sickness), screamed of joy, just as he did when he won that Pokémon Match against Andrés in the Shitbox Rally

Ángel:“OH MAHH GAAAAAWHD !!”
Catherine:“What happened, Milksweet, am I smoking ? Car’s sinking ? Are we snapping ?”
Ángel:“WE AREN’T LAST ! I REPEAT, WE, AREN’T… (Interference for a little moment) !”
Catherine:“Wait… Really ?!? Am I that good !?”
Ángel:“Indeed you are, Honey Bunny, keep it up, great job ! Great Job !”

Yes. They had come out of last place for a brief moment ahead of the Bricksley. Said lead over last would be gone once they stopped for refuelling, but, hey, this moment truly raised some spirits for Y.E.A.R… Even María, who came back from the Bathroom, with her gastrointestinal problems increasing in magnitude, had reasons to be happy by this.

However, another issue began to show as dusk fell: Snap Oversteer. The same problem the Speed Freaks were suffering now was also a suffering matter with the guys from Y.E.A.R… However, unlike the former, the latter had this effect by nature, not by badly made tuning. Catherine would keep things controlled though, for the relief of the team.

María watched from afar, quite nervous. Not only her drive was next, but she’d receive some truly horrifying news when she got a Text Message about 20 minutes before 8 PM. By now, Ángel and María knew that Mikko Harjanne was driving all night, thanks to Alexandra for telling them said information. Due to that, they’d have to be quite careful in the next 10 hours.

And then María checks the message she received. It had seemed to have come from her worst nightmares…

María's Nightmare Source from here on out... (Read for Context, it's short anyway)

???: Miss María Yukobaiyaroslavl.

If you fail to finish under any circumstances (retirement, mechanical failure, accident, etc), you are fired.

Have a good night.

  • The HNJRBC.

Just like that, María was now in true jeopardy, but she was doubtful if telling the truth so everyone would have some mercy with her… Or if keeping on hiding it in order to disallow others to hurt her even more by having said knowledge.

María would have to wait for venting however, as there was another thing going on in the Y.E.A.R. garage. At around the same time, the team celebrated Kanna’s Birthday (which, if you didn’t notice, was on October 5th, which was on race day [I didn’t edit the post to put the changes in Age of both Catherine and Kanna for nothing !]) discreetly in the pits. There’s cake and soda, and people can be invited from 7:45 to 10:20 PM, given how it’s meant to be a relatively short celebration (Kanna’s Birthday Party can be held more comfortably when they are back in Japan, so…).

Ángel saved some cake for Catherine (“Once she comes back, she’ll be really hungry”, he thinks), while Kanna is willing to save some cake for Chanty (who is driving at the moment and won’t come back until 10 PM). María, while conscious of her worsening state of lactose intolerance (with effects starting to become notorious), decided to eat a slice in hopes that would calm her nerves down…

But it was pointless, as Ángel approached his older sister…

Ángel:“Oi, Mari ! You drive next…”
María:“U-Uh… Oh… Yeah.
Ángel:“You sure you feel alright ?”
María:“I… I… C-Can last…”
Ángel:“Remember… You have told us to keep the car in one piece… If that thing arrives here working by midnight, I’ll attempt to buy you some Lactaid before I drive… If I can just find a farmacy here… And then you can stay in peace… Remember, don’t race that Finnish Moron, and if he bumps you… Once you two come back down on the pits, teach him a lesson.”
María (resisting to crying):“W-Wish… m-m-me… l-lu-uck…

The lactose intolerance was peaking. “I’ll go and rest after this drive from hell”, thinks María, as she gets in the Qua with some difficulty when the clock strikes 8 PM. Catherine comes out of the car at that same moment and hugs her tiny boyfriend with all the joy in the world.

They aren’t aware, but, María is on a meltdown… It’s just a matter of time before she can’t hide things anymore.

Current Status of… The Car !

  • Current Damages aside, nothing else.
  • Brakes starting to suffer minimal fade. Nothing done to fix them.

Repairs/Mods/Inspections: None.

Current Status of… The Team.

Ryoga: Tired, but happy and motivated.
Catherine: Really hungry and thirsty. But joyous. About to be swapped out for María Yukobaiyaroslavl.
María: Extremely Nervous and Stressed, Feeling Really Sick due to Lactose Intolerance. About to be swapped in for Catherine Jansdatter. All Stats reduced by 1 in the first half of her stint.
Ángel: Happy and Motivated, but Thirsty.
Kanna: Really Happy.
Hou: Still nervous, tired. Mechanical Skill decreased by 1 for the next stint.

Team Activities: Celebrating a Birthday of a Member (Kanna Yukobaiyaroslavl). Kanna’s Party will be held from 7:45 PM to 10:20 PM on the garages, and people who come can get some cake and soda to eat and drink (notable exceptions for some people who won’t be allowed entry).

They are still playing music over the radio.

Mentioning: @Nicxv, @Madrias, @HappyHungryHippo

5 Likes

TEAM TRAFIKJOURNALEN - PRE-RACE TO 8 PM

Sorry. I really had 1000 other things getting into the way of finishing this. I hope I can catch up better in the future.

With the IP Brigadier and car trailer for this year replaced by a Sanju LD40 car transporter, our team was rolling with the brown Archanan barge towards Höljes. Filip Andersson complained as usual, meaning that the truck wasn’t much of an improvement. Mats Hansen’s counterargument was that now they could at least listen to the clattering diesel at 90 km/h legally instead of 80, all while some tape with trucking music was barely heard when it tried to kill the dried out early 90s speakers.

Arriving at the track and unloading the ARVA, Filip Andersson took a little look around the pits, and quickly came into contact with the Seinäjoki speed freaks.

“Oh hello, Filip Andersson here, from the magazine’s own team, nice to meet you. Uhm…and I see that your weapon of choice was a Sedlak.”

As the rest of the team was now busy doing whatever they wanted, some of them eating, some playing Venttii and some just wasting time, Jani and Alexandra were sitting with each other, smoking and talking about cars, as it seemed. They were talking in English, and while the girl seemed to perfectly speak it with a slight Canadian accent, the blonde guy was straight up talking in rally english.

*Jani: “Yeah, the new K35R is powerful, but the K40R…another different beast.” *

Alexandra: “Those are really fuckin’ rare and really fuckin’ expensive though. And also really fuckin’ unreliable, but still, my dream car.”

Jani: “Yeah, that V8 is the be- oh wait! Is that the magazine’s team?”

Jani had noticed a member of the official Trafikjournalen team approaching them. And while Alexandra waved at him openly, Jani was definitely slightly less open, however friendly, for a Finn, giving him a slight smile.

Alexandra: “Yo, 'sup. You know, it’s nice to meet you. Alexandra Boyd, the pleasure’s all mine, and we’re the…Speed Freaks, what was the place again? I don’t know Finnish, I’m sorry.”

Jani: Seinäjoki Speed Freaks. Really nice to meet you, I’m Jani Kyllonen, and…yeah. That’s our car, first generation Sedlak Silva, 1.8 Turbo engine and 4 wheel drive model. Found it in a shed…well, Akseli found it in a shed, he’s…there cleaning the truck.

Alexandra: I don’t think 'ya should go talking to him now, unless 'ya want him to last out. He’s pretty…into his little private moments.
sorry for the wait

Filip: Oh, hum…the 4 wheel drive…turbo. Yes. That’s something nice. Do you know what some genius decided we should drive this year? A fucking ARVA Kondor!

Alexandra: An…ARVA? What’s that?

Jani: The real question is, how do you find one that is still alive?

Alexandra: Is it some obscure Euro brand I don’t know about-

Filip: It is a fucking shitbox from Archana that was supposed to be “luxurious”. All it does is shakes and gulps fuel and weighs like if it is carved out of lead. And thiis one is beat to shit by some farm kids already. What are our chances here, you think?

Alexandra: Fuck, I think everyone here’s mostly on the same boat…shit, it can’t be worse than all of the other cars in here.

Jani opened a pack of cigarettes, offering one to Filip. Do you smoke? Want one?

Filip looked over at Alexandra. “Eh, if you don’t know what an ARVA is…you don’t know how bad it is either. Fuck. It has a giant V6 that makes just a little bit over 100 hp. Not even malaise era yank tanks were that bad. And said V6 is made out of some Archanan…alloy…that probably weighs like lead. Fuck. I wish I had your car…”

Looking over at Jani he kindly rejected the offer. “Nah…nothing for me but thanks anyway.”, and left.

The next car he saw was a Mara, that he had mixed feelings about. Knowing that someone else brought a brown, Archanan barge? Good. But on the other hand, Maras were a bit more…progressive…than the Arvas. They probably would drive in circles around the ARVA. A Vortex looked like if it could be worryingly fast, a WAZ? Well, another Archanan shitbox but one that actually could outrun its own shadow. Some cursing in German was heard around some ex police cruiser Globus, there was also a white Brunelle, he stopped to say hello to the team members, but realized he could not stay with every team and talk, so he went further.

There were indeed some mad ass builds too. An Ishii that looked like if it was heading towards a zombie apocalypse. Someone had welded an exocage around a DAW which almost looked like cheating. A Torrento looked like if it was lifted from the FIRESTARTERZ game (see AGC24 for reference). The Hooligans were here this year too with a sad looking Bricksley that maybe could rival the ARVA in shittyness. Some Phoenix pickup looked like if it was close to falling apart too.

A Flint coupé with a powerful engine and all wheel drive could be a strong contender - if the advanced technology would stay together. Some cars looked more like if they had survived some discount version of pimp my ride, like an Astral and a Mishuto. Other cars were surprisingly normal, there was a red Cutter, an equally red Cago, a blue VerBanka that would probably at least be reliable and economical, if not the fastest on the track. And a silver Qua? Well, they were tricky to drive and not very fast, so at least the ARVA could probably beat that one.

Filip Andersson had some arguing with the other team members about that he appearantly acted nervous and stupid just because a girl appeared in the pits, which he of course denied.

Finally it was time for racing, and it was decided that Erik Carlén should take the first hours, at least they could have a chance to get some laps before the car fell apart, with their best driver… It was slow but steady at the start, some gravel was showering it from the spinning Astral at the start, but other than that rather calm. The first drama was once again caused by the Astral when hitting the Sedlak.

Some hours in, however…

BANG!

The ARVA could not really stay in its line when a Flint did hit the rear corner of it. All Carlén could see was the Cutter approaching it, thinking “fuck…”, but at the last second, the Cutter disappeared from his point of view, while a Torrento was passing close to the side window of the ARVA.

"Oh well, that’s just shitbox racing as it is…, he said to himself, managing to squeeze in the ARVA behind the WAZ. Maybe some fatigue was starting to kick in, because not too long after…

BANG!

“Oh shit, there was the Torrento…”, he thought for himself, hearing something on the radio soon afterwards.

“Why did you take your revenge on the Flint out on the Torrento?”, Mats Hansen was laughing.

“Because unlike you I know where the accelerator is!”

Maybe he knew it too well, since he somehow got his revenge on the Astral it seems like, sending the gravel flying over it, when managing to pass it with a powerslide. Fact is, maybe out of boredom he seemed to think that this was turning into some kind of drifting event. He took it a bit calmer for a while, however, after seeing a panicking Catherine Jansdatter almost hitting him from behind with the Qua.

A while later, the ARVA rolled in for its first pitstop.

“Hey, it is holding up well!”, he said to the other team members that started to fill up the tank.

“Yes. And barely outruns the parts flying off it when they do”, Filip Andersson answered cynically.

“WHAT THE FUCK, DID YOU SEE?..”, Hansen was shouting. The DAW with its deathtrap exocage almost turned into a rolling marble on the track.

“Who did ever allow that scrapheap monster to enter the track?”, Andersson said, shaking his head.

With Carlén leaving the pits, the rest of his time racing was rather uneventful. Well, for him at least…

TO BE CONTINUED…

Written in co-operation witn @nicxv

4 Likes

Part 5: Jan thawing up

in cooperation with @nicxv (Speed Freaks) and @Elizipeazie (Valentin Schrant), mentioning the Interceptors by @AndiD, YEAR by @Angelustyle, Highway Hooligans by @Madrias, TotB by @oldmanbuick and Marians Dream by @tailgate_sniffer

Mikko just couldn´t stop walking in a circle.

Daniel: “For fucks sake, stop making me nervous!”

Mikko: “We are two laps behind these hippos! And that large and heavy car is difficult to pass. We need to get past them before that geezer drives, he might be old, but I looked him up on German pages, he is an experienced and successful amateur racer, unlike that discount rocker.”

Daniel: “Rhinos.”

Mikko: “Oh, there is that fat commie. I have an idea!”

Mikko runs to Jani, violently pulling him aside.

Mikko: “You see that punk walrus there? I noticed that you get along quite well… GET ME THEIR TACTICS!”

Jani: “As the son of a race driver you should know that fairness is important, no, I won´t!”

Mikko: “I know one thing: The victory is all that counts. So, either you get me the information the friendly way… or I will get it from her the unpleasant way… but then I guess, that girl won´t be able to drive anymore…for a very long time, and looking at her, I really don´t want to put my competitions weakest driver out of the competition.”

Jani: “You don´t dare that! And she is not the weakest, you underestimate her!”

Mikko: “So… hurry up. You remember how good my punches are, don´t you?”

Jani did as ordered, confused how to avoid a conflict, and greets Chanty

Chanty: “AAH! Jani, you scared me… my headphones were so loud that I didn´t notice you coming… you look stressed, are you OK?”

Jani: Hey…hey, I’m sorry! I’m sorry- I didn’t mean to…it’s just. Well…I’m pretty stressed out, yeah, you could say that. How are you, by the way?

Chanty: “Worried… because last year was very … eh, … well, my father almost died and Jan too, so, that´s a lot of memories, but … no, I am fine, because this year everything seems to go well!”

Jani: I’m happy for you…glad everything is alright now. But…there’s something I have to tell you, maybe that’s the reason why I am stressed out.

Chanty: “May I guess? It´s Mikko?”

Jani: Yeah…it’s Mikko, heh…am I that predictable?

Chanty “Not you, but he is”

Jani would grab his pack of cigarettes from inside his pocket, then quickly light one, before turning back towards Chanty.

Jani: By the way, do you mind if I smoke? I really don’t want to if you don’t like it.

Chanty: “Eh, give me one, too, I ran out of them because I wanted to stop but… no, I want to smoke again now. Anyway, what´s up?”

Jani: Oh, okay. I didn’t think you smoked…but to be fair, Alexandra is very similar to you and has probably used every drug known to mankind at least once, so, here you go.

He would hand her three cigarettes from his pack, also handing her the lighter so she could smoke no problem, before taking a hit and going back to talking.

Jani: Well…he’s had this stupid idea…he wants me to ask you information on your plans, or else he’ll probably punch me again, then get them out of you. I don’t want you to get hurt and I’m not letting him. Hey…sorry if it doesn’t make sense, I just got up-

Chanty took a deep breath from her cigarette

Jani: I don’t know, he’s probably screaming at Akseli on the radio…as he’s been doing for hours now…

Chanty: “Make sure he does, because he should watch the beginning of your hollywood career. Trust me, I have an idea that might work…”

Jani: An…idea? Wait, what do want me to do? I don’t want to hurt anyone…

Chanty: “You dont have to…Just pretend as If… Give me some light slaps that look dramatic and pull a bit on my hair and such…He will think that you tried your best getting the information.”

Jani: I-I don’t know if I can do this…I am sorry, I really am- I don’t want to hurt you…

He would quickly take a hit off of his cigarette, before glancing at his watch…4:15 PM… some time left until Mikko would be busy driving.

Jani: I have good news and bad news…the good news are, Mikko probably won’t notice that I didn’t get him any information…the bad news…well, he’s gonna be driving all night from 8 PM on… Please…PLEASE, be careful, promise? He’s genuinely scary when he drives-

Chanty: “Oh, you should see ME driving… Its my turn in almost two hours. I will watch out, and… you like Alexandra very much, don’t you?”

Jani: She’s…she’s my best friend…why do you ask me that?

Chanty: “I noticed that idiot has a crush on her… Whenever he comes to close to her, call us for help.”

Mikko was thankfully distracted by a Phone call or such, so Jani had an easy exit out of the unpleasant situation there, without having to prove some acting skills…

When proceeding to Y.E.A.R, Chantal was happy to spot Alexandra, arriving at 4:15 PM. Both felt great about the encounter, hugging each other, having a smoke and exchanging the latest gossip from the teams. While Alexandra warned Chanty of Mikko, Chanty told Alexandra to tell her if Mikko comes too close and she is in the need of help. Even if Alexandra was one of the few people NOT underestimating Chanty and noticing she`s both focussed and courageous behind the insecure and not very intelligent first impression she makes, Alexandra still had a lot of doubt that she could really stand a chance against Mikko, both on and off the track.

At the driver swap, things were a bit more stressful.

Thomas: “Finally. Now, that was not too bad - your task was keeping the car alive and not being too slow to ruin all podium chances… and that´s what you managed. You are hereby dismissed with honors.”

Jan: “Thomas, we are not in the military, and we do not fight a war.”

Chanty: “We do - against Mikko.”

Thomas: “I heard some unpleasant things about him, so I get why you want a duel with him. But you have to promise me: Don´t mess with him, leave that for me. All of my time behind the wheel is shared with him, and I know how to handle these hot-heads.”

Chanty: “I am no longer a little girl, come on.”

Jan: “But don´t push it too far. That guy is crazy, and we better beat him off the track the smarter way.”

Meanwhile, Jan was refilling the tank, while Thomas let the engine cool down a bit and checked for oil and water, which needed a bit of refill for the next hours. The brakes also desperately needed these 15 minutes of cooldown, and Chanty looked towards the other teams.

Chanty; “Interceptors, Chitko, Hooligans, some teams also change drivers now…”

Jan: “Beware of Klackers. He won´t ram you on purpose but he doesn´t make prisoners if you are in his way. That guy is a good driver, but also isn´t right in his head.”

Thomas: “Nothing wrong with a little fighting spirit. Winners are winners because they WANT to win, so does Klackers. I guess midnight to 2 AM will be very challenging, when I am driving against Klackers, Angel, Mikko and Martin from Vet Inte… some really tough nuts to crack then. Oh, it´s time to resume racing now. Chantal, you are ready to sta… HEY!”

With spinning tires, the Globus took off… spectacular show, but not really effective. But now all others noticed that the Globus isn´t doing a coffee tour anymore.

Jan: “I am worried…”

Thomas: “Yes, especially for everyone else on the track now.”

Jan: “You know who is the real danger. I wished you would drive all the time when Mikko is out there.”

Thomas: “That guy does a 10 hour stint. I am already going way above my limit with the 8 that I agreed to do. I am not 30 anymore, I even doubt that I can really do these 8 hours, but I will try.”

Jan: “I really don´t want them to win… they are already third even with Akseli as driver, if Mikko comes in, they will be even faster.”

Thomas: “The Flint is so far ahead… and still in very good shape, while the Sedlak seems already quite damaged. I really don´t see them winning. But surprising how good these Maras are. I already lost in the Shitbox Rallye by far against the Interceptors in such a Kavaler, and now they are again much better than we are. Crap.”

The two male team members laid down in the camper, with one watching Chantys actions on track, and the other getting a bit of sleep. Especially Thomas wanted to relax as much as possible, as he wanted to be fit for his task - the age showed up lately more and more.

Jan: "OH NO, SHE WILL CRASH!

Thomas: “OOOOOOH…SHIT!”

But Chanty didn´t lose more than her right mirror when skidding into the Phoenix, and that car also sustained no damage except for a little paint wear.

Jan: “That… was close.”

Thomas, in the walkie-talkie: “EEEH! Don´t hand me over a wreck.”

Chanty: “Not my fault, they should have gone wider when I pass them if I am so many laps ahead already… anyway, no bad feelings here, looks like we´re both happy that it was nothing, and that mirror was already shit before the contact, so don´t complain.”

Jan: “Hm, she´s right, if we look at the Bricksley… You mind me going to YEAR now?”

Thomas: “No, but why?”

Jan: “Kanna has her birthday party… and I want to make sure a bit of cake is reserved for Chanty, they are worse eaters than her…”

Thomas: “Yeah, get lost, I will prepare myself for my turn then, doing some healthy excercises and such to avoid fatigue.”

Jan: “Damn, you take that really serious. Your are entering a car, not a coffin, don´t exaggerate.”

Thomas: “I SAID GET LOST!”

Jan walked to the YEAR site, arriving at 7:45 PM, and got a jump hug from Kanna.

Jan: “Uargh, thank god I am already used to that from Chanty…”

Angel: “Bad for your back, but good to hear that Chanty has these happy moments.”

Jan: “Not as many as Kanna I guess, but yes. Just because Chanty has depression and anxiety it does not mean that she is feeling shit all the time, that´s a prejudgement and bullshit.”

Kanna: “I even left her some cake.”

Angel: “What? We started sharing it a second ago, and that plate for Chanty is ALL THAT IS LEFT?”

Kanna: ._.

Jan: “Wow.”

Maria: “Great. Catherine will be REALLY pleased, as she is as much as a glutton as you, Kanna.”

Kanna: “SURPRISE SURPRISE!!! Of course we got another cake…”

Angel: “Which I will now take care of… so that it doesn´t have to face the fate of it`s sibling.”

Kanna: “You´re mean…”

Jan: “No, he is smart. Anyway, Kanna, I wish you all the best for your new year of life, and … I am hungry and thirsty from driving, so… LET´S GET THE PARTY STARTEEEEEED!”

The YEAR members looked a bit surprised at Jan, as he was usually more for himself and rarely socializing on own initiative, so they saw it as a compliment that he does that now, and gave him a coke and a piece of cake. With his walkie-talkie, he contacted Chanty.

Jan: “So, I am at Kannas birthday party, and guess what? We managed to secure quite a bit of cake for you!”

Chanty: “How that?”

Jan: “Kanna… made more cake, and passed one foward to Angel to hide it from her.”

Chanty: “Kanna… sharing …food?”

Jan: “She must really like you then, yes.”

Chanty: “Oh, I have a surprise, too. NOW LISTEN!”

With the horn, Chanty honked Happy Birthday, while the Qua pulled in for a driver change, and Maria, feeling visibly uncomfortable, was swapped in against Catherine. But also in the pits was the Sedlak, and Mikko Harjanne pulled his teammember out, tossing him on the ground. Whoever watched it now knew what to expect on track…

Thomas, wandering around the pits to get his body into movement, helped Akseli up.

Thomas: “This guy might be the best driver here, but he needs an urgent lesson anyway. I will be ready.”

Thomas said it in a way that unmistakeably made clear that the oldest driver in the competition shouldn´t be written off the list yet…
After enjoying a cigarette, Thomas looked at his watch and walked to Valentin, who sat in his truck, scrolling on his smartphone.

Thomas: “You are not watching the race?”

Windows closed and distracted by the phone, Valentin failed to notice Thomas approaching. He carefully opens the door a wee bit:

Valentin: “Come again?”

Thomas: “I am surprised that you do not seem to enjoy the event.”

Valentin: “Might enjoy it if participants would keep noise reduction equipment in place… It simply is louder than comfortable for me… By quite the margin…”

Thomas noticed the eyes of Valentin glowing like that of a cat.

Thomas: “Eh! I think there is not only something about your ears, but also your eyes.”

Valentin has to think for a moment before he realizes what Thomas is referring to thanks to the exterior mirror:

Valentin: “Highly experimental treatment went sideways… Things have changed since then…”

Thomas: “I See… and I think I better don´t ask further questions on that matter… So, you seem to be cold in that Car, you want to warm Up in our Trailer with a Coffee?”

Valentin: “Not fond of coffee, thank you.”

Other than being bundled up in many layers of clothing, Valentin did not show any other signs of being cold.

Thomas: “So… there is one thing I would like to ask. You seem, apart from… a “little” derailment at this years shitbox rallye… to be a calm person. So, how do you deal with people that are just real assholes? I can not stop being pissed at that peculiar asshole, and it´s clearly not good for my heart issues.”

He puts the phone down onto the dash, it displaying a random Wikipedia article.

Valentin: “Not sure how often you encounter the assholes, but not engaging with them seems to work for me. Granted, part of that might be linked to appearance as well, so your mileage may vary.”

Thomas: “Let´s say, the person is treating others like shit and I would like to give him a lesson for it, but on the other hand, other team´s members are none of my business.”

Valentin: “You could make an attempt at talking things out, though most people who treat others like that are beyond reasonable arguments… Or their problems in life are reason to believe that others cannot have a good one as well.”

Thomas: “Sounds like politely asking then what`s the problem in his life that causes this behaiviour would be the most logical thing, thanks Valentin. If you need something, let me know…”

Valentin: “Will do. Good luck.”

Car status: Ignoring the fact that it was a pile of junk to start with, it´s still fully intact, aside from some dented sheetmetal - but under the surface, the Globus is still fine and shows no signs of fatigue.

Team status:

Thomas: Preparing for his long shift, and very focussed to be competetive, but he has become calm with age. No crowbar driving style to expect anymore from him.

Chanty: Doing fine, as she is less exalted when her mind is busy from having a task to focus on, especially when it´s about driving. A bit overambituous for her experience level but overall fine.

Jan: Relieved to not have messed up. His driving duty is fulfilled, and as he is useless as mechanic, will propably take the advice to socialize more than before. As of now, unlimited availability for RP.

4 Likes

PART 3 - 8 PM - MIDNIGHT

For some reason, the driver change in the Cutter seems to take time, we don’t know why but it seems like the drivers have some kind of argument going on. Almost having a crash with the Cago after leaving the pits after the driver change, Hank Richmond in the Flint is maybe a bit nervous, since this is the slowest we have seen the Flint drive this far. The Mara and Sedlak also gets out a bit late on the track, due to refuelling. Even with some body panels now removed, it seems like Cody Acorne in the Bricksley is trying to kill the remaining ones against the guardrail, this far with no luck yet. The team decides to do a quick checkup while filling up the tank, though.

The Cutter gets into a skid, followed by a rather nasty counter-skid, but Lionel Winters manages to save the day. Soon after that, the exact thing happens to the Ishii, but less luck there, it slides into the guardrail with a bang. Even if it seems to not be very damaged, the team decides to do a checkup when they are going in for refuelling anyway. The ARVA seems to have some problems with the grip at the moment, which may explain the unusually slow pace it is being driven at. The Cago goes in for refuelling. María Yukobaiyaroslavl in the Qua notices a bit late that the Cago is slowing down, leading to a close encounter. The sudden braking comes as a surprise to Jens Mai in the Mara that comes to an even closer encounter with the Qua, stopping just in time with smoke coming from the wheels. Being a bit hesitant to use the regular brake, Rémi Le Bec in the Brunelle pulls the handbrake,leading to the Brunelle spinning around a couple of rounds, but without hitting the Mara or Qua in front of him. Puente in Team Phirm Eggplant’s Mishuto tries to avoid the spinning Brunelle, but in the end has to pull the handbrake and spin out due to the hefty understeer of the Mishuto. Maybe a bit overly confident, Chantal Nilfert in the Globus decides to floor the accelerator to pass all the cars instead, and while waving at Maria while passing the Qua, she misses to see the Sedlak in front of her which she hits from behind at rather high speed. The Globus comes to a standstill but doesn’t look all that banged up. It is worse with the Sedlak that now looks more like an AMC Gremlin from the rear, but after some quick chatting on the radio, the Speed freaks decides to at least try to keep driving since it does not seem to show all that weird behaviour, strangely enough. The VerBanka has to brake hard to not embed itself into the trunk of the Globus, and in turn the Astral has to brake hard to not hit the VerBanka. For once, the careful driver is strangely enough Cody Acorne in the Bricksley, passing this scene slow and careful, shaking his head. There is some nudging of the guardrail by the Torrento when it is plowing into a corner and suddenly decides to swing out its tail.

The Cutter is drifting a bit wide through the turns at the moment. The WAZ runs completely out of fuel and has to coast into the pits. That also slows down the Phoenix, DAW and Qua, that does not have any possibility to pass it at the moment. The Sedlak trying to pass the Astral in a corner leads to some close encounter but without contact. The Torrento does a wild spinout.

After a little encounter with the Phoenix, the headlight of the Sedlak pops out. The lens and reflector seems to have made it, just not the brackets, and after adjusting the fender with a crowbar to make the headlight fit again, the team uses some creativity with duct tape and hose clamps to get the light back in place again, since it is becoming rather dark now. It seems like Jens Mai has to encounter the kind of unstable nature of the Mara at the moment, because keeping it on the track seems to keep him busy now. Another car that seems to encounter a lack of grip is the Mishuto, plowing heavily in the corners. Nothing like the Torrento, which is spewing clouds of gravel from its rear tyres at the moment.

The ARVA comes into a small skid that Hansen quickly corrects. The Sedlak comes into a skid that makes the tail slam into the guardrail, but despite the wheel taking a hit it is surprisingly enough still going rather well after the track. The driver of the Ishii is maybe getting a bit too confident and spins it around.

The ARVA comes back from a fuel stop, but sputters a bit when leaving the pits. The Mishuto understeers so much that Puente has to use the handbrake to save the situation. The Astral comes into a counterskid that is hard to straighten up, ending with a guardrail bang. The Phoenix bumps the Cago slightly. Richards Hammersbach brakes the Mara hard to not get involved in that incident. The Ishii hits the guardrail which sends the skull hood ornament flying, getting its horns entangled into the bars around where the windshield once was, meaning that it has to go make a pitstop to remove it, due to blocking the driver’s vision. The Qua has to swerve for some flying debris from the Ishii, sending it into a spin. That, in turn, slow downs the Bricksley coming behind it.

The Flint now goes in to fill up the tank. The VerBanka has been driving fast for a while but that also shows in some kind of erratic driving at the moment. A beast like the Globus of course needs some fuel, so it is going in for a refill. The Astral then slams into the Torrento, that also is coming out from a fuel stop, which for the small car more or less is like slamming into an immovable object, it is no longer tracking straight since the structure has suffered too much damage, and is out of the race. If there is any good news for the Torrento? Probably not, but at least it can continue driving. Trying to get the slow moving, all bent up Astral off the track slows down the Phoenix and Ishii coming up behind it.

The ARVA is skidding a bit wide through the corners at the moment. The Brunelle goes in for refuelling. Not any wiser by what happened a while ago, the Mishuto once again spins by Puente applying the handbrake in panic while understeering through a corner, almost hitting the Cutter. Speaking about the Mishuto, it also goes in to fill up the tank. The Torrento rapidly switches from under- to oversteering through a corner, but Protea in the Torrento manages to save the situation. The DAW once again tumbles around a little bit when the support wheels touch the track. That sends some dirt flying over the windshield of the WAZ, slowing it down just for a moment. The Qua has to swerve to avoid the tumbling DAW.

Halfway through the race, the standings are as follows:


  1. Team off the books - Flint - Lap # 793 @oldmanbuick (0)
    bild

  2. The Interceptors - Mara - Lap # 781 @AndiD (+1)
    bild

  3. The rot - Ishii - Lap # 776 @Chaedder (-1)
    bild

  4. Team PhirmEggPlant - Mishuto - Lap # 757 @PhirmEggplant (+2)
    bild

  5. The Rhinos - Globus - Lap #756 @Happyhungryhippo (+2)
    bild

  6. Seinäjoki speed freaks - Sedlak - Lap #749 @Nicxv (-1)
    bild

  7. Три Полоски Racing Team - WAZ - Lap #747 @0rangeghost (+1)
    bild

  8. Team Bowling - DAW - Lap #746@Djadania (+1)
    bild

  9. Team Vortex - Vortex - Lap # 743 @George (+2)
    bild

  10. Team Chitco - VerBanka - Lap #739 @MrdjaNikolen (0)
    bild

  11. A wing and a prayer - Astral - Lap # 736 (DNF) @Rambow (-7)
    bild

  12. Team Marian’s Dream - Phoenix - Lap #716 @Tailgate_sniffer (+1)
    bild

  13. Team Vet Inte - Cago - Lap #714 @06DPA (-1)
    bild

  14. Bugs in the Code - Torrento - Lap #692 @Fayeding_spray & @Leone(0)
    bild

  15. HeltR SkeltR & Marcel - Brunelle - Lap #688 @Dildoplocus (+1)
    bild

  16. The Highway Hooligans - Bricksley - Lap #687 @Madrias (+2)
    bild

  17. Team Left for dead - Cutter - Lap # 683 @stm316 (0)
    bild

  18. Team Trafikjournalen - ARVA - Lap #678 @Knugcab (-3)
    bild

  19. Y.E.A.R. - Qua - Lap #670 @Angelustyle (0)
    bild

8 Likes

OK, strategy changes or other plans should be DMed to me before 5 PM friday october the 25th. As usual, I can’t promise to implement what you want but you can always try…

2 Likes

Team Highway Hooligans

Race, 8 PM to Midnight


“I’ve got a need! A need for SPEED!” Cody yells into the radio, the tires squealing as the Bricksley clatters off of the guardrail with a mighty bang.

“Bring it in,” Trevor grumbles in response. “Your need for speed just cost you time. Besides, efficient as the turbo-five is, it needs gas.”

The car rolls into the pit lane, and Trevor looks over the back end of the car, shaking the rather loose rear bumper and inspecting the broken tail-light housing. Jake fills the tank with gas, occasionally checking on what Trevor’s doing.

“You got lucky, leadfoot,” Trevor says to Cody. “The bumper ate shit and not the rear quarter. You jam that trunk lid shut, it’ll be a rotten day for us if we lose any more rear lights.”

“Yeah yeah yeah,” Cody grumbles dismissively. “We clear to go?”

“Get your ass back on track,” Jake says.

“Speed and POWER!”

Cody’s bellow into the radio (and across the pit lane) is accompanied by a brutal five-cylinder roar, a great-big-cloud-of-smoke rolling off of the driver’s side rear tire, and a turbo sneeze as the auto-tragic decides to upshift and bogs the engine down while the Bricksley shoots back onto the track.

As the Cago goes in for refueling, the Qua’s driver gets startled, stomping on the brakes. The resulting brake check leads to a harsh lock-up from the Mara to avoid rear-ending the Qua, smoke pouring off the wheels (and/or the brakes). Then the Brunelle does a savage 720° spin to avoid the Mara and the Qua, forcing the Mishuto to spin as well. Then the Globus gooses it through the gap and rams the Sedlak right up the tailpipe with some force, squashing the Sedlak’s back end up until it resembles a quirky 70’s compact, and simultaneously stalling out the Globus. The VerBanka nearly hits the Globus, brake-checking the Astral - both vehicles manage to avoid further collisions. Cody just rolls on by, shaking his head and laughing as he gets on the radio.

“None of you lot would survive 30 minutes in Chicago. This whole race has been a fun Sunday drive for me,” Cody quips. Behind him, he hears the Torrento banging its ass off of a guardrail and shakes his head again.

Two hours later, Cody sighs as debris flies off of the Ishii, causing the Qua to cut into his lane and forcing him to lift off of the gas. “You do know these used to be cop cars, and that if I didn’t lift, I could PIT maneuver that mid-engine mini-wedge right into the wall and not feel it, right? Your lack of attention caused the Big One two hours ago… Wake up and drive,” Cody snaps into the radio.


(Mentioning @Angelustyle because of the two incidents, passing mentions to @AndiD, @PhirmEggplant, @Happyhungryhippo, @nicxv, @MrdjaNikolen, @Rambow because you were all involved in The Incident.)

4 Likes

To all teams: Turbo Terrors are faster than you. We keep the gamble up, running lower fuel, worse tires, loads of risks an big balls.

2 Likes

Part 6: The Crash

including YEAR by @Angelustyle, mentioning Speed Freaks by @nicxv

While Jan socialized with the YEAR team, suddenly Maria yelled in panic over the radio.

Maria: “OH NO!”

Angel: “WATCH OUT, THE MARA!”

Jan: “Damn, this was close!”

Meanwhile, Chanty noticed the mess but, from being confident at driving and throwing her usually sensible and shy personality out of the window, she made a daring attempt to get the landyacht with a powerslide through the small gaps, even waving at Maria since from lapping her a few times, she noticed that Maria was unter great stress and pressure, and wanted to ease up the situation… Chanty, not really good at focussing on more than one single thing, slammed with a lot of force into the Sedlak, and the car stalled, smoke and dust was everywhere.

Jan: “CHANTY? ARE YOU OK? ANSWER!”

Angel: doing some worried cursing in both Russian and Japanese

Kanna: “OH NO! What happened? Is she fine? I hope the cake will cheer her up if she is out of the race.”

Chorus: “KANNAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!”

Jan: “Chanty, are you there?”

Chanty: “M…hm… I am a bit dizzy, and everything hurts… but… I guess I am fine.”

The dust cloud was gone, and revealed that the Globus has now a quite ugly front end… and that the whole trunk of the Sedlak was gone.

Catherine: “OH NO! SHE RAMMED THE SEDLAK!”

Jan: “Chanty, is the car still going?”

Chanty: “I… have shut it off in panic…”

Jan: “GET GOING! YOU RAMMED MIKKO OUT OF THE RACE! AND HE IS TRYING TO GET OUT!”

Chanty: “Oh fuckfuckfuck…”

WIth a roar, the Globus came back to life, and the reverse gear failed… so Chanty took the exit by speeding foward, denting the Sedlak even more, before getting it loose from the remainings of her front bumper. Mikko yelled some very harsh words and showed her the middle finger with fury.

Jan: “I have to leave, I need to wake Thomas up!”

Jan told Thomas what happened, and Thomas was happy to see that the Sedlak was surprisingly still in the race.

Thomas: “So, he is still busy driving, that will give some time to cool down. If he attacks Chantal, I can not guarantee for anything.”

Jan: “I tried to talk to her… but she is just crying… I think you should swap in.”

Thomas: “Chanty, should I change in early?”

Chanty: “N…no, I… am not a little girl, I can do this…”

Thomas: “So, you are ok and the car, too?”

Chanty: “One light is still going, and seems fine, yes… I mean, the car is built for ramming…I could just need some refueling, but it will work until 10 PM…”

Thomas: “Fine, please get some rest then.”

Chanty: “Darling, is the cake still there?”

Thomas: “You really can only think of food even now? Well… all right.”

At the driver swap, Chanty did not talk much and hurried to the camper, where she had a breakdown, but Jan was able to cool her down a bit, at least enough to make her open the door and let him close…

Jan: “Nah, better don´t go to the Speed Freaks. The car is in need of repair, and with Mikko around the team… no, don´t do this. How about that cake?”

Chanty: “Yes… yes, I will do that…”

Jan: “But please mind that you drive later again… don´t get drunk and … also try to get some sleep…”

Chanty ran out, pushing Jan away.

Chanty: “NOW I GOT TWO FATHERS OR WHAT? I AM NOT A LITTLE GIRL! LEAVE ME ALONE!”

While smoking some cigarettes, she first went to the YEAR camp, as she promised Kanna to celebrate her birthday, although she didn´t feel like celebrating.

“Fuck it, I wanted to stop that damn smoking…Why can´t I finally make at least one thing right?”

The YEAR team noticed, that Chanty didn´t feel too well, and tried to cheer her a bit up.

3 Likes

Team PhirmEggPlant mumbling amongst them self. Knox says “if Puente keeps this up we’re not going to have an ebrake soon” Vires " True but atleast the rear brakes will be… do you guys think the rear brakes are out?" Rose Replies " lol, that would make sense"

1 Like

question, what does “-7” mean? is that the condition or something? because it doesn’t seem like one slam with max carefulness driver would do that much damage, and take me OUT OF THE RACE. What do you mean, i was writing a story here. now i cant even do a 2nd chapter because of a single crash i had with the most carefull and slow driver possible.
is it reperable? i deliberately deliberately wrote in a contingency for if it was, but it hardly seems necessary here.

The numbers there mean the number of positions gained or lost. So, for example, before 4-8 PM you were 4th.

At 4-8 PM you were still 4th, hence why there’s a 0.

From 8-12, you passed from 4th to 11th, loosing 7 positions.

2 Likes

And (DNF) means (Did Not Finish) so it doesn’t seem repairable…

-7 is just that you have fallen 7 positions behind since last round. And yes, your car is out of the race (DNF = Did Not Finish). It is not because of a single crash, you have been in multiple ones, the dice rolls were unfortunately very unfair to your car and you ended up with irrepairable structural damage in the end. This is just how this challenge works, not every car will survive and this time it has been rather mild this far. Last year it looked more like british banger racing in the end. :roll_eyes:

2 Likes

Y.E.A.R.

Description of the Team

Last Episode (“Nunavummiut Wonders, María’s Nightmare and a Happy Birthday”)

Race Episode 3:"Messy Sailing for a Messy María; Radio Problems Plague the Team"

Around 8 PM.

María:“Oughhhh… My… stomach…”
Ángel:“I know it hurts, but, I’ll buy you some Lactaid once I find a drug store.”
María:“Remember to wish me luck…”
Ángel:“Sure will. Remember, don’t focus on competitiveness. Patience is key. I’m sure eventually someone will DNF and soon we’ll leave last place before we DNF or…”

María finally couldn’t contain herself an began crying. It was very unusual seeing her like this. She normally was serious and cold, but today it seemed she had to get her bearings right… A hard task given the circumstances of the day as a whole.

While Kanna and some others were passing it great at her birthday, María was personally suffering. Although hearing Chantal blasting the horn playing Happy Birthday kinda(?) cheered her up a bit.

At 8:02, María Yukobaiyaroslavl sits in the driver seat and leaves Y.E.A.R.'s pit box with unusual care. As always, their start would be rough…

She nearly got into a massive wreck at the beginning of her cycle, after making a Rookie Mistake and noticing late that the Cago was pitting, nearly causing the big wreck herself… Sure enough, that absolutely alarmed her team. But unlike her responses, which were harsh and fast, Ángel’s were… Calmer. More serene and focused on her status.

Ángel:“Are you OK ?”
María:“I… Think so ?”
Ángel:“I’ll… Try to tell you from now on when someone is coming to the pits. Don’t worry about it, and you just keep driving. To finish first first we have to finish.”
María:“C-Copy.”

The mood would swing for the team however when Chantal got into a hard hit with the Sedlak… Ángel would still tell María to calm down, but he’d probably get to say a “BLYAT !” or two.

And so would go the rest of the fall of dusk as night began to settle. Some time later, the WAZ runs out of gas, and María, while unable to pass it for a moment, handles the situation well enough to get some praise.

Hou:“Those guys in the WAZ… They should’ve gotten, I don’t know, a Cuowu or an Autocubana.”
Ángel:“If they truly wanted to save some gas, then yes.”
María:“OK, guys… I think I’m… Uhhhhhhh… I’m not feeling any better… Stomach burns badly…”
Ángel:“Take things easy then, I mean, we have been last all day, not like it’ll matter now… Just calm down and take it easy, longevity is better than speed.”
María:“Okey-Doke.”

The Middle Section of María’s stint however went somewhat smoothly. Something needed for her to gain confidence… Until it was broken again at around 10:25 PM, as after trying to avoid Debris from the Ishii, Cody warns María about the fact that he ain’t patient.

Maria’s response, given the circumstances she is facing, is understandable, but at the same time, it’s ANYTHING but warm.

María:“OH, YOU GET TO KNOW !”
Ángel:“María, please calm…”
María:“YOU KNOW I’M ABOUT TO CRAP MYSELF AND THAT I’VE BEEN SUFFERING ALL DAY LONG ?!?”
Ángel:“Мария, успокойся. Пожалуйста.” (María, calm down. Please.)
María:“どうやって落ち着かせたらいいの!?” (How do you want me to calm down !?)

And then, guess what…? Radio Trouble would finally catch Y.E.A.R., as the Radio was now even Jumping to different channels. Increasing communication trouble meant that something was bound to happen, and that was with the Speed Freaks. Mikko didn’t seem happy at all, after his day was nearly ruined by María (for causing the almost pile up) and Chantal (for ramming him up quite badly). The Sedlak was in increasingly worse condition, and the thing Mikko wanted least was to hear from his rivals… Well, unless for strategy that is…

What he heard cranked his rage up to eleven. Having a hatred for Russians was part of him… And he eventually found out about Ángel’s (technical) nationality.

Ángel:“Послушай, я не хочу, чтобы мы сошли с дистанции из-за того, что ты врезался машиной, я не знаю, в барьеры безопасности или что-то в этом роде. Относитесь ко всему проще.” (Listen, I don’t want us to be out of the race either because you crashed the car into, I don’t know, the safety barriers or something. Take it easy.)
María:“そうですね、落ち着くように言ってください! 彼は今にも爆発的な下痢を起こしそうだし、トラック上で最も多くの事故を起こしているのは私だ! なんてことだ、私はひどいよ!” (Sure, tell me to calm down! I’m about to have explosive fucking diarrhea, and I’m the one causing the most accidents on the track! Gosh, I’m horrible!)
Ángel:“Ты не ужасен, ты просто расстроен. Продолжать идти. Я пойду за лактазой позже… если найду аптеку здесь, в Хельесе…” (You’re not horrible, you’re just frustrated. Keep going. I’ll go get the lactase later… if I find a drugstore around here in Höljes…)
Mikko:“WHAT ARE YOU JAPANESE IDIOTS DOING ON MY RADIO ?!?!?”
Ángel:“Uhhhh… Oh sh… (Long Interference)”

Ángel switches back manually to the original Y.E.A.R. team radio channel for both the car and the pit crew. The radio was giving them issues all day long, but this time it had gone very wrong. Understandably, Mikko was angry (maybe too much), but, Akseli was too… And asked for explanations.

Akseli:“Oi !”
Ángel:“It’s not my fault ! We didn’t even realize we had switched to your channel ! We don’t know what on earth is wrong with our radio !”
Akseli:“Yeah, sure.”
Ángel:“Better keep it calm with Mikko, I’m sure he’ll want to kill me after he gets out of that thing… If he gets out of that thing to begin with.”
Akseli:“You know I can’t prevent it.”
Hou:“How can you not, you’re his teammate ! If he wants to fuck us all over then tell him to fuck off himself.”

The Ambient was tense as Hou pronounced those words. Everyone in Y.E.A.R. was surprised to see her like that; after all, this was a side of Hou people had never seen. A more… “Open” Hou, if you will. A more daring Hou, out of her Shy Gal Image. This brief moment of courage wouldn’t last long however, as she lost the warm temper a minute afterwards, and once again returned to silence.

Things continued not so smoothly for Y.E.A.R… María loosing laps left and right, but the car holding up surprisingly well. It seemed they would retain last place pretty much forever…

Until, eventually, around 11:15 PM some news sounded sounded thru the team radio…

Ángel:“You doing good, you doing… Is the Astral out ? I think the Astral’s out.”
María:“What ? Someone DNF’d ?”
Ángel:“It was another sports car, the #91 if I’m not mistaken… (Interference) …Danver must be pissed.”
María:“Don’t remind me about the fact that I’m about to explode and crap myself here ! I want this to… (Interference) !”
Ángel:“Sorry, Mari. Keep Driving, you shouldn’t worry.”

An hour earlier.

Before the Radio Incident, and as María struggled to contain her Lactose Intolerance from causing her Gastrointestinal Mayhem, Catherine, Kanna and Chantal spoke while behind the pit wall.

Catherine:“I’m actually glad you slammed him from behind.”
Chantal:“I mean, it wasn’t my intention.”
Hou:“But… Y-You did it properly.”
Kanna:“What are you guys talking about ?”

Despite the brief chatter about Mikko quite earlier in the day, Kanna hadn’t met him yet. She was one of two members who hadn’t met the Finnish Menace (the other one was Ryoga).

Chantal:“I’m a bit worried about María though. I think I saw her involved in the wreck.”
Catherine:“Well… She was the one who nearly caused a pile-up.”
Chantal:“Yeah, I mean, María caused it. But, I guess Mikko will still blame me. Still, without her I wouldn’t have managed to ram him that perfect.”
Hou:“I absolutely agree. And, I think María, despite what it seems, seems to have a decent run…”
Ryoga:“I mean, we are still running quite clean. And my little brother is turning up next.”
Chantal:“Ángel is driving next ?”
Catherine:“Oooooh, girl, yes… My Milksweet is hoping to beat Mikko’s Ass on the track. I know he’s messy, but, when he’s in the zone, he’s a brilliant driver.”
Ryoga:“I just hope María returns in that car in one piece… And with her pants clean.”
Kanna:(gives him a poke with her elbow)“Ryoga !”
Ryoga:“Sorry, I couldn’t avoid it !”
Chantal:“But… Why is that ?”
Kanna:“Don’t you know ? María is lactose intolerant. The food she’s been eating all day long hasn’t done her any favours.”
Chantal:“No wonder why I saw her so tense in that car… Poor of her, who can’t enjoy your cake !”
Kanna:“I can agree… Poor María !”

…they didn’t know what was happening in the background.

Back to the Present Moment !

After some stoppage time, María gets out of the car at 11:56 PM… She’s had enough after nearly being caught in yet another incident with Team Bowling. María entered the pit box… Unbuckled, and RAN towards the bathroom.

Also, remember how Ángel was trying to get lactase ? Yeah, he failed on his mission… So he felt quite bad with María now for not accomplishing his part of the promise.

But now, there was light in the end of the dark tunnel for Y.E.A.R., as Ángel Yukobaiyaroslavl got his helmet on, jumped on that Qua, and blasted towards the uncertain.

Current Status of… The Car !

  • Brakes are slowly beginning to cook…
  • Radio Communication is showing some genuine faults which concern the team communication. However, it’s nothing too serious as long as it doesn’t jump channels and it’s easy to fix temporarily without even stopping the car.

Repairs/Modifications/Inspections: Some cleaning of the air intakes, and a minor inspection below the lid. Some minor electrical fixes.

Current Status of… The Team.

Ryoga: About to head and sleep.

Catherine: REALLY hungry, slightly stressed and worried. Feeling sad because her boyfriend isn’t by her side for now. Mechanical Skill reduced by 1 on the next stint.

María: Extraordinarily Sick (“Gastrointestinal Mayhem”, otherwise known as lactose intolerance which has been irritated over the day) and Tired, Stressed and Under Distress. At least her drive is over, and by avoiding many dangers and suffering minimal damage, she has increased her confidence slightly. Mechanical Skill increased by 1 on the first half of the next stint.

Ángel: Motivated, but a bit frustrated. Getting in to drive his best. But he’s unlucky… All Stats reduced by 1 (except Caution, which was already at 1) for the first hour of his stint.

Kanna: Happy, but starting to feel tired.

Hou: Hungry, Thirsty, a bit hot and bothered, as well as tired. About to head and sleep for a moment.

Mentioning: @HappyHungryHippo @nicxv @Madrias

2 Likes

Seinäjoki Speed ​​Freaks

The Race - A rally driver’s failures

SAATANA!..SAATANA! SAATANA! SAATANA!..PERKELE!

Screams were heard from the Speed Freaks’s Sedlak Silva, and the horn seemed to be beeping quite a few times. But, as you are about the learn, it wasn’t the car’s malfunctioning electrics or someone injured causing all that, it was an angry, no, absolutely furious Finnish rally driver, screaming as one of his rivals had just caused an accident, colliding with him, and had costed him a precious position. Mikko Harjanne, “Seinäjoki’s Rocket”, had just burst in a fit of absolute, rivalry fueled rage.

Akseli: Mikko! Lopeta sen vitun ratin lyöminen! (Mikko! stop punching the fucking steering wheel!)

Mikko: Tuo vitun…AAAAAAA!!! He continued punching the steering wheel.

Akseli: MIKKO!

Mikko: SE VITUN SINITUKKAINEN HINTTI TÄYSI VITUN ÄMMÄ! MURSKAAN TUON ÄMMÄN PÄÄN LEKALLA, KUN OLEN VALMIS! (That fucking blue haired…not translating the rest)

You could hear radio chatter by multiple of the Speed Freaks’s members by now, all attempting to talk after having heard what happened.

Alexandra: YOU CALM THE FUCK DOWN OR I-

Daniel: GIVE ME THAT RADIO YOU USELESS MECHANIC-

Akseli: GO BACK TO KOUVOLA, ABSOLUTE FUCKING JONNE!

Henrik: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TWO DOING!

Akseli: GIVE ME THAT RADIO! Hey! HEY! Mikko! Do you hear me! Mikko!

By now, the radio was producing useless chatter, mixed in with static. It seemed as if multiple people, people that were not even in their team, were starting to chat on Mikko’s radio. People that he knew full well…members of Y.E.A.R. had somehow switched to the channel that he was using, and boy oh boy…he was getting increasingly mad.

Ángel: Послушай, я не хочу, чтобы мы сошли с дистанции из-за того, что ты врезался машиной, я не знаю, в барьеры безопасности или что-то в этом роде. Относитесь ко всему проще.

María: そうですね、落ち着くように言ってください! 彼は今にも爆発的な下痢を起こしそうだし、トラック上で最も多くの事故を起こしているのは私だ! なんてことだ、私はひどいよ!

Ángel: Ты не ужасен, ты просто расстроен. Продолжать идти. Я пойду за лактазой позже… если найду аптеку здесь, в Хельесе…

Mikko: MITÄ TE JAPANILAISET IDIOOTIT TEETTE MINUN RADIOSSANI?!?!? (WHAT ARE YOU JAPANESE IDIOTS DOING ON MY RADIO?!?!?)

Ángel: Uhhhh… Oh sh… Long interference.

Mikko: He’s Ru- THAT WAS RUSSIAN! SE OLI VITUN VENÄJÄÄ, JOTA HÄN PUHUI SIINÄ VITUN RADIOSSA! MITÄ VITTUA!

After a discussion between Akseli and Ángel of Y.E.A.R, a concerned Alexandra would immediately approach Akseli, she needed to know what had just happened, immediately, knowing that disaster was simply mere moments away.

Alexandra: Uhm…what the hell just happened?

Akseli: A mistake, that’s what happened. Now let me be, I don’t have time for anything.

As Akseli tried to walk away, Alexandra immediately pulled him towards her. He would not be able to escape from her this time.

Alexandra: That wasn’t, JUST, a mistake. We both know full well what’s gonna happen when Mikko comes back here. What the hell did you tell Ángel?

Akseli: The truth. That I can’t prevent what Mikko’s going to do. And even if I could, I don’t want to get involved.

Alexandra: I-I’m sorry, WHAT?!?! YOU’VE SEEN WHAT MIKKO DOES AND IS CAPABLE OF DOING! HE PUNCHED YOUR BEST FRIEND, FOR FUCK’S SAKE! AND NOW WHAT? YOU DO UNDERSTAND, THAT THERE’S PEOPLE’S LIVES AT RISK?

Akseli: You are exaggerating it.

Alexandra: OH YEAH, SURE, SURE, BECAUSE YOU DON’T THINK MIKKO WANTS TO GET REVENGE ON CHANTY FOR RAMMING HIM! OR AT Y.E.A.R. JUST BECAUSE THERE’S A RUSSIAN IN THE TEAM? I always said one thing about him, that he’s a disaster waiting to happen.

Akseli: You said it.

Alexandra: LISTEN TO ME! GOD…YOU’RE AN INSUFFERABLE DICK, YOU KNOW THAT?

Akseli: I don’t want anything to do with this! Go talk to Jani…or whatever! I don’t care! Leave me alone!

Alexandra: FUCK YOU! YOU BACKSTABBING…PIECE OF SHIT…BASTARD!

After the argument that had just broken out, while Alexandra went to try and let off some steam, Akseli, clearly weirded out by the whole argument, just sat down, near his flatbed truck, watching all that was happening. The race continued to go on, the Sedlak, albeit with a few pieces missing, was still quite fast, still in the top 10, Mikko banging it off the limiter and absolutely pushing it like no other, and…well…he just sighed, lit a cigarette, and glanced off into the distance.

Current status of the Sedlak

  • Brakes are squeaking more than the usual, still safe.
  • The clutch is beginning to slip between second and third gear as well.
  • Trunk gone, rear headlights broken beyond repair, rear license plate gone, cheap chinese muffler smashed up, even louder.
  • The exhaust leak got louder.

Current status of the Team

  • Jani: Quite stressed out due to the whole ordeal, but choosing to get some rest and avoid confrontation with everyone.
  • Akseli: Fed up with the team’s arguing, he’s just sitting around, patiently waiting for his time to fix the car.
  • Mikko: Even angrier than before, and even less careful and less scared, is absolutely pushing the car to its limits and past. His anger is directed both at Y.E.A.R. and at the Rhinos, specifically Chanty.

Mentions: @Happyhungryhippo @Angelustyle

3 Likes