Posting in here so I get notified as the thread moves along… But I already kinda have a car and team ready.
3 Likes
I have also made a car for this. I still need to draw a couple of things though. Mainly redrawing one of my characters and drawing another one.
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I doubt I’ll have enough time for this, but I’d love to - and if it turns I can, I’ll definitely enter.
That said, as much as I like experimenting with faux diesels, I don’t think allowing them here is worth the extra complexity, especially since we don’t have (yet…) a widely agreed upon ruleset for their creation. The ban on diesels can be even roleplayed as there being only one fuel supplier for the event, who for simplicity supplies only petrol 
Maybe next year? I honestly hope we’ll get a streamlined diesel ruleset by then.
Also there’s so many ways to built a fun beater that I don’t think the lack of diesels would be that much of a limitation.
2 Likes
In other cases, a lighter car can be more effective, since it can more easily avoid obstacles and launch out of corners harder.
About time - anything that leads to only a minor loss of time is seldom worth mentioning.
OH NO, RHINOS!
Why are they called Rhinos in first place?
Well, Chantal, the more or less most prominent team member, mixes up hippos and rhinos all the time, like alligators and crocodiles. And so, with their last name being Nilfert, sounding like Nilpferd (Hippo), she thought they´re Rhinos… Chantal not being able to speak any foreign language didn´t make it better…
So, who are they?
Thomas Nilfert, 60, car mechanic (called “Thomas the Temper Engine”)
Thomas is old, grumpy and has a lot of life experience which makes him good at handling whatever will happen. He is smart at fixing them, but his impatience and temper turn repairs into disasters at times. He likes getting drunk, smokes in a chain and … considers trigger warnings as childish sh*t. Despite his old-fashioned mindset, Thomas is not your average boomer Karen, he can be nice and thoughtful if needed. Physical appeareance: 193cm/110 kg, strong for his age.
Chantal Jolina Nilfert, 20 (called “Chanty”)
Chantal is quite easy to spot with her blue hair and chubby figure, tons of piercings and tattoos… she is also easy to make friends with, as she is propably one of the most friendly and caring people you could meet. This came at a price, because she suffers from depression and anxiety, and could break down at the slightest inconvenience. She is said to have just a single braincell working, as she is not the smartest… and has unlimited appetite.
Physical appeareance: 161cm/108 kg, Mostly shy and insecure body language.
Jan Kellermann, 22
Jan is Chantys boyfriend and the opposite of Thomas. He tends to think before acting, and he CAN think as he is quite smart, and interessed in science, music, photography and nature. But don´t think he is just always calm. If he loses temper, he does it like Thomas, but that rarely happens. He works in care business and has career ambitions there, willing to be a good provider to Chanty and affording a family with her.
Physical appeareance: 180cm/66 kg, Always seems a bit distracted and feels wrong at the place.
As Chanty begged to do the 24h again Thomas did as asked, but was thinking what car to use. Remembering last year´s destruction derby and how Jan nearly could have died in their light car, Thomas decided to not repeat a mistake and get the largest and heaviest he could buy for the budget, and when he ordered cars from the USA, he also saw a retired police car. A 2007 Globus Grand Cruiser, one of the very last ever made.
Drunk as he was, Thomas didn´t check in depth why it was so cheap, but he had space left to fill the huge containers he ordered so the shipping was almost for free.
The car turned out to be in … not great condition. Thomas stripped the interior, fixed the worst problems and made a basic serive, installed a rollcage and slapped some cheap tires on it since the police package performance tires were all flat and bald.
After that, he searched cursing in his mess of documents.
“THIS FUCK HAS TO BE HERE!!”
“Whaff?”
mumbled Chanty, having the mouth full with food.
“The phone number of my transport company, this damn cop crap doesn´t fit onto my trailer.”
“Fiff if why you haff to keep order!”
“AND YOU DO NOT HAVE TO SPEAK WITH A FULL MOUTH! Fuck it, I will call Schrant. How is Valentin?”
“He wrote me back after I wrote him. But sadly he replied not much… I guess he was never a talkative person. Why are you asking?”
“Valentins father also has a transport company with a solid reputation. Can you please pass me the phone? DAMN! I SHOULD LOCK IT WITH A PASSWORD SO THAT YOU CANT ORDER FOOD ANYMORE!”
“You dinosaur, you do that with an app and not by calling. NOBODY CALLS FOR FOOD ANYMORE!.”
“Göteborg … Thank god I learned some English after the fall of the wall, so…that should work with Swedes. A shame you can´t practive adult calls that you refuse to do now because you …”
“Yes… go on calling me dumb just because… you are right, I am too dumb to learn English, to dumb to be able to make calls, …”
Thomas calmed his daughter a bit down and dialed the number, not knowing that the boss himself will be on the line.
“Hello, my name is Thomas Nilfert from the repair shop with the same name in Leipzig. I got a 5,5 meter long problem - my Globus Grand Cruiser needs to find a way to get from here to Sweden to this years 24h, can you help me with that?”
It was calm in the Schrant company, as… on sundays, people tend to not make up their mind with work.At the Schrant family home, the phone rang for a while and made a travel through half of the mansion until it reached the hands of Rüdiger Schrant.
“At first a good day, Sir. So, once again slowly please. You need a car from… Leipzig… in, eeeeh, at the Höljesbanen Rallycross AB…?”
“Correct! Mr. Schrant, is your son also there, my daughter is looking foward to seeing him again.”
“DAAAAD! NOOOO! THIS SOUNDS SO WRONG!”
Meanwhile, Thomas continued negotiating with Rüdiger Schrant.
“So, your company has a reputation for being reliable and having fair pricing, so it would be a pleasure if this works. I will of course provide you with all the needed paperwork.”
A bit irritated, Rüdiger pressed a few buttons - with it being on loudspeaker, audible for Thomas - on the telephone, before answering.
“I do not know yet if Valentin drives. Aside from that, I need an e-Mail-address.”
“Ah, yes, this would be… Thomas@kfz-nilfert.de. Is there something else that you need?”
“Everything relevant will be the subject of the mail you are going to recieve. Oh, my phone beeps… Valentin drives. I will add his contact data in the mail. I suggest contacting him in written, he doesn´t like phonecalls.”
The mail arrived relatively soon, and the paperwork also wasn´t a problem, as Chanty, being the only person there to at least try to keep order, searched for everything that Thomas needed to process.
The cabin Thomas rented last year was already occupied, so he would need to tow the camper trailer with his SUV, which means that the travel time will triple, being able to go only 80 kph with it and having to sleep at night in some motel, as both Jan and Chanty lacked the trailer license… so, Jan, who can´t miss any more day at work as holidays are very limited in care business, would have to drive with a seperate car, getting company from Chantal. Very inefficient, but that at least provides enough capacities to transport spares and tools.
Some weeks later, when Thomas and Chanty were arguing that Chanty stole her father´s pizza while he was briefly outside, one of the mechanics knocked at the door.
“Eh, Thomas, someone is there for you. He says it is about transporting a car to Sweden.”
The car
As Marie slapped some stickers on her SR24 car, Chanty was … not as annoyed as planned but liked them… so the 24h car of this year will have a lot of bumper stickers. Also, Chanty changed the livery a bit towars the team`s spirit animal, while Thomas wanted to make a funny gag and registered the car with the racing number “911”.
Introduction RP done in collaboration with @elizipeazie
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Team Highway Hooligans
The Crew:
Jake Storm
Height: 5’7" (170 cm)
Age: 36
Roles: Driver #1, Mechanic
Race: Human
Jake’s whole plan for this race hinges upon the car holding together, and their honorary hooligan actually knowing how to drive their underpowered land-boat in anger. That said, like all of the Hooligans, they’re just here to have fun.
Cody Acorne
Height: 5’9" (175 cm)
Age: 40
Roles: Driver #2, Pit Stop Assistant
Race: Human
Cody’s strategy is different than that of the other three - While they’re trying to preserve what’s left of the car and go the distance, Cody’s 6 hours are going to be Attack Attack Attack. If you’re in front, expect to feel the wrath of the plastic bumper. If you’re behind, watch out for brake checks.
Trevor Wright
Height: 6’0" (183 cm)
Age: 51
Roles: Driver #3, Mechanic
Race: Human
Trevor’s hoping that the car holds up okay, but he knows it’s junkyard trash with an engine pulled out of another pile of junkyard trash, with a transmission also salvaged from another old pile of junk. Sure, it’s all Bricksley parts, and sure, the engine’s the same one that’s supposed to be in there, and maybe the gearbox came from an ex-police cruiser, but he knows the car’s got problems.
Scott Morganson
Height: 6'4" (193 cm)
Age: 50 (Earth Years)
Roles: Driver #4, Honorary Hooligan, Pit Stop Assistant
Race: Panthirian Jagrilan
The only one of the crew who has driven a Grand Warden in anger, Scott got the last driver role in hopes that he could hustle whatever is left of their car across the line as quickly as it can manage. The other Hooligans have assured him, this car is better than last year’s limo, but they also admit, that really wouldn’t take much.
The Car:
1975 Bricksley Grand Warden
This former Chicago taxi cab has seen some serious shit. Built originally with a 206ci I5 in the wake of the 1973 oil crisis, this old brick once happily delivered tourists from airports to hotels, hotels to tourist destinations, and even the occasional local from one bar to another. Eventually, the tired old I5 just couldn’t do the job anymore, and after collecting a rear-end collision because it couldn’t accelerate away from the car the cabbie just cut off, it was retired to the junkyard.
That’s where Trevor came into play. Sure, anyone else would see a clapped out cab and think, "Okay, time to squish it into a cube and recycle it. Trevor saw it and thought, “Why not sling an engine in there and beat the shit out of it for 24 hours first?” He pulled a Pressurized 206ci I5 out of a small Bricksley pickup truck, the gearbox out of a crashed police cruiser that had seen a few too many PIT maneuvers, and tossed the parts together with Cody helping out and the aid of a fair few too many beers.
Those few too many beers are why the replacement hood for the one that was rusted out now has a hood bulge, two air-grabber scoops that don’t work, and a 3D printed toilet hood ornament. And why the car’s now wearing an eyepatch to cover a smashed sealed beam headlight that they just couldn’t be bothered with replacing.
To hide a broken tail-light lens, a bumper sticker was added. This resulted in the stickers ending up all over the car because “they hide damage well.”
So, what do we know is wrong with it? Not much, but everything came from the junkyard… There’s got to be reasons it was there. But for the Hooligans… Not knowing is half of the fun.
(So, yeah, I know I should be asking before putting the bipedal leopard alien on the team, but literally worst-case-scenario, we pull a “Scott couldn’t make it to the track on time” here and run with a team of three.)
3 Likes
We all wondered (or maybe not) at some point: “What would happen, when you combine a group of 4 chaotic siblings, with outworldly powers and abilities, with 2 of their friends (which are from the same species as them too), a Wild Competition, and a Moroccan Sports Car that’s on the verge of falling apart ?”
Yumeisotitanian Earthly Auto Racing (Y.E.A.R.)
After this year’s Shitbox Rally, Team Firulais theoretically dissolved. However, the spirit lives on with Yumeisotitanian Earthly Auto Racing: A team which hopes to represent Yumeisotitanians Across Earth… Initially beginning as Yukobaiyaroslavl Family Racing (Y.F.R.), Ángel invited some more people into the mix. So, let’s meet them beforehand:
Kanna Yukobaiyaroslavl - The Smiling Little Sister
I can say (rather proudly), that I have improved in drawing… Sadly this came at the price of taking longer to do so.
Age: 21 (At the time of writing. DoB: 05/OCT/2002)
H: 156cm - W: 108kg
Kanna is the younger sister in the Yukobaiyaroslavl quartet. Quite snappy, joyful, and always capable of making you smile, it’s hard to recall when she’s sad. A great singer, but hasn’t really left Japan (except for one time when she had to attend to a recent funeral in Saint Petersburg).
As a big eater, and a heavy drinker, it’s a bit difficult to keep Kanna satisfied.
She has Mind Reading, Telepathy, Increased Strength and Resistance, and the capability of turning into Statues and back.
She drives at a moderate speed, and is a clean driver.
Stats:
Driver - ★★
Mechanic - ★★★
Pit Stop A. - ★★
Spotter - ★★★★
Ryoga "Ryo" Yukobaiyaroslavl - The Foolish, but Charismatic Older Brother
I took inspiration of certain characters of my favorite Manga to draw Ryoga. Hell, even the name. Can you guess ?
Age: 27 (DoB: 02/NOV/1996)
H: 172cm - W: 68kg
Ryoga is the older brother of the family (yet not the oldest sibling present). A dumb, but confident and funny guy, always capable to give some comic relief. Has a very strong brother relationship with Ángel, and they work well as a Dynamic Duo.
Even though he may be the least troublesome, and despite his strong-guy image… He has one weakness: Hou. She is his crush, and he just can’t really express himself properly with her. Not like he is rude or impolite, just that he gets quite timid…
Has Mind Reading, Telepathy, Increased Strength, Speed and Resistance.
He drives fast, but not what you can call clean, as he sees driving as a bit of a giggle.
Driver - ★★★
Mechanic - ★★★★
Pit Stop A. - ★★★★★
Spotter - ★★
Hou Niu - The Shy Gal
No, Hou ain’t Japanese.
Age: 26 (DoB: 09/DEC/1997)
H: 181cm - W: 66kg
One of Ángel’s friends at some point at High School, and, both awkwardly and unknown to her, Ryoga’s Secret Crush, Hou may not be as sociable as the rest of the team, generally wanting to stay behind. However, she’s OK talking with people she knows that will be good to her. She’s Chinese (more specifically, from Chongqing), but has lived in Japan since she was a teen.
Being very shy and timid, she’s a bit hard to open up. However, once opened up, she becomes very servicial and friendly. Not that she is aggressive to begin with. As a person, she is very much like Ángel: Clumsy, weak to alcohol, weak emotionally, and blind without her glasses…
Has Mind Reading, Telepathy, Increased Strength and Speed, and Telekinesis.
She drives painfully slow, as she ain’t a very experienced driver. Makes one wonder how she actually got to drive (given how she doesn’t know how to use a stick). Also, don’t expect her to be clean…
Driver - ★
Mechanic - ★★★★
Pit Stop A. - ★★
Spotter - ★★★★★
María Yukobaiyaroslavl - The Older Sister, with a suspiciously unknown past
For the facts, I will say something. I actually had older designs of María and Kanna. I also tried to remake Ángel several times, with mixed results…
Age: 30 (DoB: 17/DEC/1993)
H: 186cm - W: 74kg
María ain’t usually mean. She is occasionally very nice, but don’t try to push her too hard; she has claimed to have a “personality disorder”, but only her nicer half will actually tell the truth. She may even go mad…
María has a great fear for Cats, and is lactose intolerant. Let’s hope no large groups of cats are present, and that she didn’t forget to bring the lactaid pills… Sadly, that may not be enough, as she has a bit of sweet tooth (she likes candies a lot). María is a heavy drinker too.
She has Mind Reading, Telepathy -I think those two will be normal for everyone here-, Increased Strength and Resistance, and the Capability of Hypnotizing.
She’s can drive depending on her condition, but, generally, she drives from a moderate to a slow speed, although she’s probably a bit dirty, same as Hou.
Driver - ★★
Mechanic - ★
Pit Stop A. - ★★★
Spotter - ★★★★★
Catherine "Kate" Jansdatter - "Honey Bunny"
I can say, Catherine may be the worst drawn out of the team. However, in my defense, I can say, larger characters aren’t my thing to draw. I may improve in drawing far taller/wider characters soon though. But hey, if an AI can (most of the time) recognize her body shape, then I guess I succeeded.
Age: 28 (At the Time of Writing. DoB: 22/SEP/1995)
H: 176cm - W: 188kg
This Canadian-Groenlandic girl, is, hard to believe, Ángel’s Girlfriend. How did we get here ? Well, back when Ángel was still in Vladivostok (yes, he moved residences), he recieved a Valentine’s Gift (3 months after Valentine’s though…): A box of chocolates, which was already half consumed… And a love letter from a “Secret Admirer” who lived at Kitakyushu. As bad as a start this may seem, Ángel felt like he finally had found someone who would love him… And boy, he was right. Catherine absolutely loves her little “Milksweet”. Not to mention she is lovable as a person too.
Maybe her eating capacity surpasses almost everyone else’s combined. And she’s a heavy drinker too. Not to mention, she doesn’t stand being without her lil’ guy for too long. Her size and weight may also cause problems at times.
She has Mind Reading, Telepathy, Increased Strength and Resistance, and the Capability of Inducing Sleep.
As slow as a driver she is, she is very skilled with dirt, gravel and snow, as the Canadian Roads weren’t exactly too easy either before moving to Japan. She is not very clean, but, she, same as Ryoga, looks at driving as a bit of a fun activity.
Driver - ★★
Mechanic - ★★★★★
Pit Stop A. - ★★
Spotter - ★★★
Ángel Yukobaiyaroslavl - The Chaotic Mind Reader
For him, I actually wanted to share three pics. The design I used for him when he got the Valentine’s Gift, the one from just before leaving Vladivostok, and the one for now.
Age: 25 (DoB: 26/NOV/1998)
H: 162cm - W: 52kg
You may know this guy already, as he participated in this year’s Shitbox Rally in Team Firulais. That in itself was a riot. He still keeps contact with the members of the Firulais, but he decided that from now on, he’d get along better with other “Yumes”, for racing. What better way to be with other Yumes than with your sisters, your brother, a Yumeisotitanian Friend and your Yumeisotitanian Girlfriend ?
But, in case you don’t know him… Well, he’s quite an interesting person. He’s very easy to scare off, very easy to alter, and definitely easy to mess with, but has a heart of gold, which is no surprise given how close of a relationship he has with everyone in the team, not to mention his “Honey Bunny” (the nickname Ángel uses for Catherine), with whom he’s had already a few months.
He has Mind Reading (which is the one power he can’t control… Which caused some really interesting moments across this Year’s Shitbox Rally… And will most likely also cause havoc in this event too), Telepathy, Increased Speed and Resistance… And probably has Extrasensorial Perception too, but, he doesn’t know… at least, not yet.
He’s very fast as a driver, if not the fastest in the team, as he was an Amateur Rallycross Racer at some point. Also the most skilled mechanic. Sadly, his fast driving style doesn’t mean he is clean. In fact, he is quite accident prone when he finally looses control.
Driver - ★★★★★
Mechanic - ★★★★★
Pit Stop A. - ★★★
Spotter - ★★
Wait, wait… I know what you might be thinking right now.
First: Will they use their powers to other people’s disgrace ? And the answer to that is, a big, ominous, no. Maybe Ángel will get a bit of mind reading during his drive (although, truth to tell, that may cause more damage to this team than whoever gets their minds read), or anyone else could communicate via Telepathy, but, that aside, no one will use their powers. Although, keep in mind, they can use them in the pit area and overall outside of the track, where they may not necessarily cause problems.
And secondly…
What on Earth (or even outside it) is a Yumeisotitanian ?
But, in case you want a more defined version of this story, then strap yourselves in.
Some 500 years ago (at least, in this version of the universe), a “Snapping” happened somewhere around the Archipelagos of Southeastern Yumeisotitania, taking some 5000 humanoids in total thru a short voyage to planet earth.
These beings have all sorts of magical powers (although, that itself is quite obvious when looking at the lineup in this team). Sadly, they arrived on earth in a time where magic and science was despised by just about every person. So they were hunted down, and recurred to hiding.
These beings didn’t start to appear publicly on earth until the late 19th Century, when they were the focus of scientific research. However, then came the 20th Century, and with that, another hunt, as companies looked for these beings for productivity, after realizing they mostly have higher stats than us humans. Including resistance. I mean, they technically aren’t humans… So why would human rights apply in them ?
Eventually (more specifically, in the 80s), these beings were set free again, and the same rights applied to them, same as most other Humanoid species.
Right now, on Earth, some 110-120k have Yumeisotitanian ascendency. And on this year’s 24 Hours of Clunkers, 6 of those are present.
(If you want more details, ask me. After all, the Yumeisotitanian are more related to the Shitbox Rally than to the 24 Hours of Clunkers…)
And with that, it’s time to introduce…
The vic... err, I mean, The Chosen One
1983 Qua Kruzar 900e (disguised as a GT)
Here we have it.
A 1983 Qua Kruzar… “GT” ?
Well… We have to give a quick explanation.
Qua is a Moroccan Car Brand established in 1980, in the City of Rabat, Morocco. It started by producing the “Shams”, a FR Sedan, based in 1970s technology. Then came the Eayila in 1982, a Hatchback with Front Wheel Drive and a wide variety of engines. And then, in 1983, Qua felt a bit more like doing something more risky… And with that, came the Kruzar, a tiny sports car.
The Kruzar is a MR 2-Door, 2-Seater, Convertible Sports Car. At least, in it’s first generation.
Now, why the “GT”…? Quick story here. María gave Ángel the money to buy “a car”. Given how they are established in Japan, Ángel went to an auction, where he found this machine. He initially thought that María would congratulate him for buying such a machine by half of the budget present…
And then he receives it… And suddenly realizes why it was so cheap…
Under that lid, usually there’d be a 1600cc Inline-4, at minimum, if it truly was a GT. What was actually there was a 900cc… At least, it was still an Inline-4, and it wasn’t an improvised fit, as it truly was an engine available in this car, based on the Eayila Engines. But still… With a mere 38 HP and 55 Nm, Ángel felt like he could’ve fought his intrusive thoughts for this little sports car…
However, not much later, during a Test Drive, Hou blew up the engine by Money-Shifting it. So Angel swapped the engine which came in the scam… The engine he used (and, on which they hope to finish)… Was the old 1.4l Inline-4 Aurora Engine; yes, the same used in the Aurinko of the Firulais. And, while yes, the 1.4l is a bit slow (61 HP, 95 Nm), it’s at least fast enough to actually be somewhat competitive.
After that, he looked deeper into the service history. Apart from the now obvious “GT” badge which was installed for $3 or so, he also found that this car was wrecked at least twice. That explains why some bits are mismatching and also how the steering was vague at times, and at other times it was extraordinarily sensitive, when he did a test drive from Chatan to Naha (both in Okinawa).
Another thing he noticed in his test drive was how the transmission was a nightmare. Luckily, he did fix that… Which is something Hou will be glad of later (hoping that the transmission doesn’t blow up during her drive). What he didn’t fix was the electrical system. Or, at least, he tried his best, but, sometimes gremlins can slip thru…
The driver side door doesn’t work… Which makes Kanna’s, Catherine’s (and occasionally María’s) entry and exit a bit troublesome (especially for Catherine… Who struggles entering anything that ain’t big). However, that is nothing compared to the very last issue.
See, this car seemed quite fine (speaking of rust) underneath and outside. Probably a side effect of the car being in the dry environments of Morocco and Egypt before being shipped to Japan shortly before Ángel found it…
However, there was one bit… Which seemed almost entirely made of rust. Some bit in the middle of the chassis threatened to split the car in half. Ángel tried his best to eliminate rust and reinforce the rusty bit by welding it together and adding a bit more of metal in both sides (to balance things off), but everyone was afraid of the car snapping in half. Unless they wreck very hard, and they are hit in a very specific place, that ain’t happening. But the fear is present…
Don’t forget to add to the list of damaged stuff some small damages here and there, how the mirror simply won’t resist to wind, and how some of the taillights are broken or not working (however, they don’t seem to care too much about that, because they thought they’d get broken anyway during the race itself).
After this, and some test drives by almost everyone present, then came the time to make the car look like it belonged to them. A number equivalent to the sum of “Yumeisotitania” in A1Z26 cypher, their names, the Team’s Logo, some stickers… And some sponsorship opportunity María found in her own company give this car a really nice look for what it is. Along with possibly the smallest spoiler that didn’t look cartoonishly small.
Their hope… Finishing. Just that. If they win, better. But only finishing, knowing how hard was last year’s event (they didn’t participate, but Ángel heard of it and certainly now knows how brutal is this endurance race) would be an achievement for these guys.
The "Plan".
Ryoga will drive the first 4 hours.
Then Catherine will come in for the next 4, hopefully fitting in there and not breaking the suspension with her weight.
Then comes María, for the 4 hours after, hoping to not have any lactose intolerance issues in her drive, and therefore not having to go to the bathroom in desperation midway thru her drive.
After María, Ángel drives for the following 4 hours, given how he’s pretty much the one with the highest resistance to sleep… I mean, he doesn’t really sleep much. But will Catherine stand those 4 hours ? And most importantly, will Ángel have Mind Reading Incidents during his drive ?
When he finishes, Kanna takes his spot for 4 hours. Hopefully she ain’t drunk or excessively stuffed when she gets behind the wheel.
And lastly, Hou drives the last 4 hours… Sadly, this will imply her trying to learn how to drive with a stick… and at a Race Track. At the same time.
This plan should go as it is… If they don’t DNF at any point.
So, wish them luck ! Another debuting team, and what could be the spiritual successor of the Firulais, is ready for some action ! And this time, I promise, it won’t be their last event.
Edit #1 - Holy Crap. I actually duplicated a picture (making these posts on a phone means I sometimes get confused…). Solved it now…
5 Likes
So, I put up some more official rules now, that still has a long time for rules delib, so please check them through and give your opinions since they are honestly mostly copied from last year and slightly changed, might contain bloopers.
I decided on NOT allowing the faux diesels for this year, because as @Hshan said, that may require some more investigation for a streamlined ruleset. Nothing says that the possibility will not come back for another year though…
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Oh. I forgot another thing I was considering, letting service costs somewhat decide time in the pits. Like, service costs under XX - two dice rolls and the best gets chosen. Over XX - two dice rolls and the worst gets chosen. Opinions?
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It could make sense, given that anything that costs less to maintain will be a boon in pit stops.
Service cost divided by reliability? Less likely for something to break and how easy it is to fix
Reliability is already the factor that decides IF something breaks when a roll says a certain number, so…
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I have some pretty bad anxiety issues at the moment, unfortunately, and can hardly think. I will postpone rules delib until wednesday the 11th of september, 5 PM CEST to start with. (Still plenty of time to build a car, so no deadline extension)
5 Likes
OK, I added the pit stop modifier now…
In case your car has a service cost of $450.00, or under, or in case it has a service cost of $900.00, or over, you will get an extra roll for the time in the pits. In the case of the lower service cost cars, the best roll will be chosen. In the case of the higher service cost cars, the worst roll will be chosen.
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I was curious and did the math:
For one roll each result has a 16,(6)% chance of being rolled.
For two rolls, assuming lower results are chosen, it is:
30,(5)% for 1
25% for 2
19,(4)% for 3
13,(8)% for 4
8,(3)% for 5
2,(7)% for 6
And the reverse, if higher results are chosen.
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SUBMISSIONS ARE OPEN!
And yes, I haven’t really worked through the “driver profile” thing yet. But it will probably appear in form of a sheet you can fill in yourself, and has nothing to do with what you need to post in here about the team. It will also be totally volountary to use it. So, feel free to start sending stuff in. Since I have seen almost no objections after an almost extremely long delib, I see it as the rules being OK… 
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Bumping this with a little under two weeks left for submissions!
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Hello !
I didn’t get if we can modify the engine, and if we can to what extent (exhaust system, same configuration DCOE instead of 2barrel, compression, sharper cam profile / springs & lifters, RPM limit, turbo, fuel map…) ?
With that, I also didn’t get what you meant for emissions and loudness, do we have to keep what’s in the original car but worse ? Or can we remove the catalytic converter, mufflers and fuck up the fuel map ?
To put it this way, how am I supposed to know what the original car looks like?
Fiddle with such stuff if you want to, just keep in mind that if it is obvious that it is something that would have been tinkered with (like 32 valve V8 in a small FWD hatchback) that might give some punishments, as well as if you send in something that obviously wouldn’t have been cheap if there was nothing wrong with it…
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[Conversations ranslated from Finnish to English]
Seinäjoki Speed Freaks
You have to picture this scenery. It’s the Summer of 2023, and in the outskirts of Seinäjoki, Finland, on the dirt roads, two old, 2 stroke dirt bikes seem to just be ripping it across the mud and dirt. Two teenagers, both of them wearing their helmets, with license plates nowhere to be seen, seem to just be racing each other on the tracks, while poppi wheelies, drifting their back wheel, and just having some old school fun, as it seems. At a certain point, nearing a house, the two stroke noises and obnoxious blue smoke stop, as the two bikers stop, get off their bikes, and each of them takes off their helmets.
Jani Kyllonen, 17, Student, He/Him - Gay.
Getting off of his high-end tuned moped, is Jani, the youngest of the three. He is easily recognized because of his typical risk-taker attitude, and the fact that he seems to always be holding an Euroshopper energy drink in his hand. He has blonde hair, wears glasses and loves to take risks, usually translating to running from police when on his moped, or making extremely risky moves when driving, both on the public roads (without license), or when on track or on private land. He’s the friendliest and most sociable of the three, but at the same time, often screws up even in simple situations, but he can be of helping hand if and when he wants to. His problem? He always underestimates the seriousness of situations.
Mikko Harjanne, 19, Unemployed, He/Him - Straight.
Riding a 125cc Motocross Bike, Mikko is…quite peculiar, when we’re talking about this trio. Even with his quite young age, being the son of an ex-rally driver clearly gave him some skill. He’s a focused individual, easily the best driver of the three, however, he suffers from severe anger issues, which cause him to often road rage while driving, as well as causing fist fights after a race. He used to be a street racer, racing his heavily modified Gyazu Bayview for money and pink slips. However, after getting caught by police once, he dreams of actually going legit, and he may or may not have found an occasion for him, his close friend Jani, and a friend in common, for the trio to actually go legit. He’s a heavy smoker, so you’ll often see him smoking a cigarette.
Mikko: Jani, wasn’t this friend of yours supposed to wait for us?
Jani: I don’t know? I called him-
Mikko: You called him? So where is he? Voi saatana…you made me come all the way here for nothing?
Jani: Can’t you wait for 5 seconds, dude? Also, what’s this thing you won’t tell us about that you want us to do? Didn’t you stop with street racing?
Mikko: I told you I fucking stopped! I- screw this. He starts lighting himself a cigarette. If this works, we’re going to become professionals.
Jani: Uh…Mikko? The rally is in 3 months, we can’t get a car ready in time, you know that, right?
Mikko: It’s not the fucking rally…sigh…you know Trafikjournalen?
Jani: The Swede car magazine? I fucking hate their journalist. What about it?
Mikko: They’re doing that 24 hour race in October next year. I want to win that race, that, or just place well enough to go professional.
Jani: You know me, wherever you’re going, I’m coming with you. Can I have a cigarette?
Mikko: Suksi vittuun! I know you said that just so I’d give you a cig. Just kidding, have one.
As the two are lighting their cigarettes, the door finally opens, and the third person is finally revealed.
Akseli Vanhala, 22, Mechanic, He/Him - Straight.
Akseli, even at a first glance, clearly doesn’t seem to care about his appearance in any sort of way. He’s a bit baby-faced, has short, brown hair, and is always dirty from working on cars, bikes, boats and agricultural equipment. Even at a first glance, he’s immediately noted as an introverted individual, preferring the mechanical complexity of engines to the social complexity of humans, however, he’ll talk to you if he has to. As for driving, he’s the worst of the three, being skilled, sure, but less than Jani and way less than Mikko. He compensates this with calm, and composed demeanor when driving, compared to Jani’s unpredictability and Mikko’s absolutely manic style, he tends to get back to the pits in one piece. He’s also the most skilled mechanically, able to easily diagnose problems and fix issues with the car. He also likes smoking, as well as beer and energy drinks.
Akseli: Can you not be so fucking loud? My mom’s sleeping.
Mikko: Where did you get this guy, Jani…oh, hey! Your name is?
Akseli: I’m Akseli.
Mikko: That’s it? Just Akseli? Nothing else?
Akseli: What do you want, my phone number? Want to date? Want my size as well?
Mikko: Hey! You talk to me like that one more time, I’m throwing that spanner to your face, understand? Ruskean reiän ritari…painu vittuun…
Jani: You’re getting the fucking spanner to the face you say that one more time! Ai saatana… we’re not here to argue like kids! We have something to do. Mikko?
Akseli: I’m only hanging around this guy because I’m your friend, Jani, understand?
Mikko: Sigh…you know Trafikjournalen?
Akseli: Swede car magazine? I always read it.
Mikko: Yeah, and you know that they’re organizing the 24 hour race next October?
Akseli: And let me guess…you two don’t have a car?
Jani: And that’s why we came to you. Listen, we’re making a team, we want to become professionals…and we need a mechanic. You’re the best I know.
Akseli: And what’s in it for me?
Jani: We can split the winnings! And…if we don’t win, I don’t know, we’ll have fun together? And we can all become professionals? Plus, Mikko here is the best driver I know, you’re the best mechanic I know, and…I can be team manager? I can do a bit of both too-
Mikko: Hold on, hold on, I got the idea, I’m team manager, no questions asked.
Akseli: Will you two stop it? Come with me, I’ll show you the car.
Jani, Mikko and Akseli then started walking over towards Akseli’s garage. Anxiety and excitement were in the air, as the trio was about to see what would be the car that would take them through the 2024 Trafikjournalen’s 24 Hours of Clunkers. They raised the garage door, and under the door, barely shown under a tarp, was a rusted-out, 1998 Sedlak Silva, plated XEM-384 a Czech-built sedan, what was once the cheaper alternative to the German-built 4 doors, seen as it was under the same group, now sat in a shed, ready to either die, or restart life as a budget racer.
Mikko: That? I’m going from a 700 horsepower Gyazu Bayview to that shitbox Sedlak?
Jani: Come on, it’s not like we have another choice-
Mikko: Plus! I don’t drive front-wheel drive cars, you know me. They’re just boring!
Akseli: That “shitbox” has the 1.8 Turbo engine. Plus, it’s the 4-Track model. 195hp and 4-wheel drive. It just needs some work, and we got a racer on our hands.
Mikko: It’s the 4-wheel drive? Now we’re talking…
Jani: Before we start, we need to think of a team name, you know? I still have to submit ourselves and all.
Akseli: Seinäjoki something. Since we’re all from here, apparently.
Mikko: And there needs to be something with speed in the name.
Jani: I got it! What about “Seinäjoki Speed Freaks”?
Mikko: Seinäjoki Speed Freaks…I like it, and it’s a cool name too.
Akseli: Yeah, that works. So…Seinäjoki Speed Freaks, are you ready to get to work?
Jani: Let’s do this!
Mikko: I hate manual labor…
And so, day after day, month after month, our heroes started working on the Sedlak Silva, to hopefully, first of all, get it running, then get it inspected, and then modifying it to hopefully make sure to win the race, or at least place in a decent position. It took them a few months to get the car running again, they had to rid the fuel tank of rust, get new fuel, fit a new battery and clean the injectors which were all clogged up, as well as regenerate the turbine, but this ended up getting the car running for the first time in almost 10 years. Then, just a week later, the first inspection!
Eerik the Mechanic: The car passed, barely. The emissions were right on the limit, but it looks like the car’s legal.
Then, months of thoughts went by as the trio ordered parts, as well as fitting new modifications to the car, such as a used roll cage, cheap bucket seat, cheap coilovers and used Toshikago intercooler, rally lights, cutting up the bumper to fit the intercooler, side mounted license plate, and an exhaust which was just a piece of pipe with a cheap chinese muffler welded to the stock headers. It was loud, really loud, obnoxiously loud. They also had to fit some cheap steelies with used tires on it, because the stock wheels would be smashed up by Jani driving into a ditch.
Jani: Why did we fit the rally lights again?
Mikko: It’s 24 hours, we need to see at night.
Jani: Then why did you put tape on the headlights?
Akseli: Speaking of tape, why is there tape on the front and rear bumpers, why can’t we put a quick detach?
Mikko: We have…basically no budget. Because Jani over here thought it was a good idea to drive the car in a ditch! Now we have steelies, and a smashed mirror.
Jani: At least my car was never impounded by the police!
Akseli: You need to calm down behind the wheel, Jani. Remember when you rear-ended that old lady on the highway with my van?
Jani: Uhh…why don’t we get to work again?
Jani: You know what would be funny? If I put Biltema and Euroshopper stickers on the car.
Mikko: If you’re doing that, I’m choosing the racing number.
Akseli: Please don’t tell me-
Jani: I wanted to put #69…it’s funny-
Mikko: Listen, dude. There’s a couple of guys from Austria that are using some American Cop Car to race. And they’re using #911. I know how to get them mad.
Akseli: Don’t be a kid, Mikko.
Mikko: We’re putting #1312 on the car! Imagine their faces when we pass them…
Jani: Let’s do this then!
Akseli: Why is the taillight smashed?
Mikko: Jani did it.
Jani: It wasn’t my fault! I was pushing the engine hoist and it just…impacted.
Akseli: You two are not working on one of my cars any time soon-
Akseli: Saatana!
Jani: What happened, man?
Akseli: It’s the fucking intercooler! It won’t fit whatever I do!
Jani: What’s wrong with it?
Akseli: Where did you buy this from!
Jani: It’s from a Stella SXR but I don’t know what this means-
Akseli: Of course! You got an intercooler for a totally different car! How can it fucking fit!
Jani: Oh, come on! Just cut the fucking bumper! Who cares!
Mikko: This roll cage looks like shit, why do we have to fit one?
Jani: Rules. We have to have 4 point belts and you can’t have those without a roll cage.
Mikko: I don’t know how to install a roll cage! It’s not even for this car!
Jani: Akseli went to grab beers. Just leave it here, he’ll figure it out.
Months later, just in time for the race, the car returned from a test drive, late at night.
Akseli: Where the fuck were you! It’s 2 in the morning! And how’s the car?
Mikko: I was just testing it out…man, it doesn’t beat my Bayview, but it’s a beast!
Akseli: What did you do!
Mikko: I was doing the top speed run…cops try to pull me over, man, then they start chasing me, I turn on the dirt, I fucking lose them! It’s so fast in the corners it’s crazy! Turned off the lights, they didn’t even see me!
Akseli: You…you ran from the cops with OUR CAR? WITH LICENSE PLATES?
Mikko: Calm down, girlie, I didn’t have plates when I ran. Plus, I lost them…like…20km away from here, they’re not coming, calm down.
Jani: I’m back! I brought beers.
Akseli: Mikko here just “tested” the car against the cops.
Mikko: And it works…man, this thing is gonna make us win so bad!
Jani: That’s amazing to know! Hey, here you two, have beers.
The three raise their beers to the sky
Jani: For Victory! And for the Seinäjoki Speed Freaks!
The beers clinked to each other as they had a toast for their hopeful victory. The day of the race was near, and the trio was as excited as nothing else.
Mikko: Now, we need to get the car to Sweden. We need to see the track, and hopefully meet our competitors. Especially the wannabe cops, I want to meet.
Akseli: I can tow you with my van…nevermind, it’s 4-wheel drive. Wait…I can borrow dad’s flatbed truck!
Jani: So, what’s the plan for race day?
Mikko: We do what Finns do best. Be aggressive and win.
Akseli: No. We need to save fuel, it’s 24 hours, and we must not smash the car.
Jani: You know me, just give me a pack of ES in the car, I’ll be up for 24 hours.
Mikko: Let’s fucking do this then. We’ll destroy them.
Roleplay introduction by: me, myself and I
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