P7 IS BETTER THAN EXPECTED LET’S GO!!!
Y.E.A.R.
Final Race Episode:"We raced like never before, and lost like always"
8 AM.
Kanna gets out of the car, and is swapped by Hou.
Kanna:“OK, Hou, drive it easy, no problem.”
Hou:“Will try to…”
Kanna:“Good luck !”
Hou:“I’ll need it !”
As expected, things got out of hand, really fast.
Hou:“I… I NEARLY MONEYSHIFTED !”
Ángel:“Keep it calm, Hou, keep it calm… You can do it…”
Ryoga:“You can do it, Sweetheart !”
…
Hou:“Did you just call me Sweetheart ?”
Ryoga:“Uhhhh… Yeah, I did…”
Ángel:“Oooooohh, Ryoga is flirty ! Hehe.”
Ryoga:“Ángel, please don’t get me embarrassed. Let’s just focus on trying to finish…”
María:“And on me not loosing my job…”
Catherine:“I’d hug you… But, you seem too nervous to do anything… And you stink…”
María:“As if your ass wouldn’t stink either. But… I’ll… be OK… ughhh…”
Not even half an hour later, Hou gets back into more trouble, after getting tapped by the Phoenix, but she somehow manages to save the situation…
Hou:“OK, guYYYYSSAAAAHH ! HO… HOLY SHIT ! HOW THE FUCK DID I SAVE THAT ???”
Ángel:“Don’t know how you did, but, good job !”
Ryoga:“Keep going !”
Kanna:“Keep Driving, Hou !”
Half an hour later, again into trouble… of which she wouldn’t come off so nicely… In fact, she’d come out so badly out of it, that it sealed their destiny…
Hou:“Where is 4th !?”
Ángel:“Why are you looking for— EYES ON THE ROAD !”
Hou:“Wha-- AAAHH !”
The heavy impact with the Flint made Hou and her team to loose contact for a minute or so. The Qua still moved, but very slowly… After they regained contact, the words that came out the radio sent chills thru everybody…
Hou:“… IT’S SPLIT ! IT’S SPLIT ! IT’S SPLIT !! AND THE STEERING IS ALL MESSED UP !!!”
Ángel immediately got off the radio. He was mad.
Ángel:“I CAN’T BELIEVE IT ! 22 HOURS ! AND IT GOES NOW ! NYET ! NYEEET ! BLYAAAAAAAAAAT !”
He started punching the wall of one of the garages with anger. He didn’t got far with that before, 1- Catherine got there to soothe him down, and 2- His hand started to hurt.
Ángel:“BLYAAAOOOoww…”
Catherine:“Calm down, Milksweet, I’m sure there’s still something we can do…!”
Ángel:“Didn’t you hear ! It’s split !”
Catherine:“…”
Catherine realized the severity of the words that came down the radio. The car was split. It still seemed like it was on one piece, but, the chassis wasn’t able to handle anything else. So they had to give up.
The large Canadian girl hugged our Russian guy to soothe him down, and hoped that María wasn’t about to descend to madness.
Speaking of María, she seemed like if she was just ran over by a truck. She was about to cry. Hopefully her bosses didn’t notice. Hopefully she could lie to them and keep herself alive.
The hopes got destroyed however, once she got a text message from… you guessed, her bosses. And the fact that she suddenly dropped her phone (the screen didn’t crack), and fell to the floor to cry, really explained it all.
Hou just then arrived to the pits. She also seemed quite sad, but for different reasons…
Hou:“I…I-I… I-I… a-a-am s-so sorry g-guys… I s-suck !”
Ryoga:“It’s OK, Hou, It’s OK, you tried to…”
Hou:“I’ll never drive again !”
Ryoga:“Hey, calm down… You are good, just that you need some more practice, but, I promise, it ain’t your fault…”
Hou:-sniffs-“I a-a-am th-the w-worst driveeeer…!”
Ryoga:“Calm down, Hou, everything will be fine…”
Kanna:“Hou, we’re so sorry, it’s not your fault…”
As Ryoga and Kanna proceeded to hug Hou, Ángel was having a different thought about whose fault it was… He had let out some steam and he was a bit more calm now, but, he couldn’t avoid to think…
Ángel:“It’s my fault.”
Catherine:“Why are you saying that ?”
Ángel:“Dragged all of you into this, with a car that most likely wasn’t gonna make it, and it didn’t…”
Catherine:“Dragging us ? But, you’re with your siblings, family, a friend, and ME !”
Ángel:“Yeah, but… I still feel guilty… I shouldn’t have dragged María into this.”
Catherine:“Hopefully she does recover… But don’t worry, Milksweet, it’s nobody’s fault.”
Speaking of María, she was on the ground, crying, and repeating the words “いや、そんなわけないよ…” (“No, it can’t be…”). Each time she tried to comfort herself, she always got reminded of how disastrous was the day. She had gotten one last glimpse of hope when she thought that maybe all of her suffering would stop as soon as the car crossed the finish when it turned to Noon… Now that the light on the end of the tunnel was nowhere to be seen, she thought…
“Penthouse, gone. Fancy car, gone. Everything I’ve built up for 5 years, demolished in just an instant.”
As the rest of her team got comforted, they tried to do the same to her as the clock ticked to Noon, in hopes to at least make her not so sad by the end of the race.
Current Status of… the car.
There’s no point. It’s DNFd. It technically still runs, but it’s no use and it can’t be fixed on site.
Current Status of… The team.
Ryoga: A bit disappointed, and not very happy anymore. He’s staying by Hou’s side to try and comfort her. While he is still in love with her, he doesn’t think this is the best moment to declare to her (little does he know, Hou never had a boyfriend, she was always too shy)…
Catherine: A bit nervous, and actually quite frustrated. She understands the feelings of her boyfriend. Hopefully she can keep him put.
María: Well… She’s destroyed and in tears. Now that she’s lost her job, and all of her other stuff will be lost too in a matter of hours, she’s fully depressed. Even when she knows that she can backup at Kitakyushu. The fact that the sequels of the lactose intolerance issues keep there, and that she had to pass thru so much on the last 22 hours really have sinked her motivation.
Ángel: Feeling Guilty, and actually very frustrated and angry mainly at himself. He continues to regret his decisions. Hopefully Catherine keeps him from snapping because otherwise, who knows what he’ll do…
Kanna: Actually quite sad and tired as hell. She didn’t want this to end this way. But she still keeps the spirits up, and she hopes to make her teammates to not leave Sweden with a sour taste.
Hou: She thinks it’s her fault. No wonder why she feels miserable. But Ryoga is staying by her side. She is slowly starting to get comforted, and her main worry now is turning to be María.
Well. For Y.E.A.R. things didn’t end so well. But, if you want to, you can still interact with them, so their story hopefully ends in a better mood.
While I had plans for maybe making a drawing for the end, I think I better leave that for the very end (aka, the post race episode).
Mentioning: @Tailgate_sniffer @oldmanbuick
3 Likes
The Speed Freaks’s Finale
By now, the sun was slowly rising onto the track, as the race was about to come to an end. Situation in the Speed Freaks’s pits was quickly evolving into a downwards spiral, but hope was still high that they could finally win. However, it was clear that the team was not going to last, between arguments, multiple “factions” having been formed in the team itself, and the incompatibilities between members, that team was just a bomb ready to explode. It was now Jani’s turn to race, wearing normal clothes and a helmet which he didn’t even know where he got it, patiently waiting for his teammate to finally pull in the pits. When Mikko arrived, it all took him by surprise, being quickly and painfully pulled in the Sedlak by the other angry Finn.
Mikko: SAATANA! Get in! Get in Jani!
Jani: STOP PULLING ME IN!
Mikko: I promise, if we lose because of you, I will destroy you and everything you care about.
In a stressed-out mood, Jani quickly made his way back into the track, the worn out tires of the Sedlak causing a big trail of smoke and dust to follow the car. Everything now rested into Jani’s hands, and nobody knew, by now, what would happen, especially seen as Mikko was now back in the pits…
Jani seemed to be actually better than expected as a driver. He did take risks, sure, but he wasn’t as dangerous as Mikko, and plus, managed to keep a healthy fifth place for most of the race. Despite all this, he clearly wasn’t as excited to race as before, he was stressed out, he was scared, Mikko’s words etched into his mind. What if he made a mistake that cost them the race? What if Mikko wasn’t happy with fifth place? So many “what ifs”, that were immediately shut up, after hearing a sweet, familiar voice onto the radio.
Alexandra: Hey! Jani! Do you hear me?
Jani: Alex?
Alexandra: Yeah, sorry if I’m disturbing…you should be focusing on the race, I’m sorry-
Jani: No! No, you are not disturbing!
Alexandra: I just wanted to tell you, man, whatever happens, I’m here for you. Don’t let that fuckin’ asshole distract you from that. There’s people that care about you, and, at least for me, I’ll always be by your side, I promise.
Jani: I…thanks Alex. Means a lot to me.
With Jani’s mood slightly restored, he continued on racing, securing his safe fifth place, and surely being less scary to the other drivers than Mikko before. But what Jani didn’t know, was that pressure in the pits was beginning to build up, as Mikko talked to his best friend Daniel on the phone.
Mikko: Miten niin hän on parempi kuljettaja kuin minä.
Daniel: No, hän ei ole kaatunut kertaakaan, hän säilytti asemansa…
Mikko: Vannon, että tuhoan hänet.
Daniel: Hyviä uutisia kuitenkin, nuo vitun japanilaiset idiootit ajoivat itsensä ulos kisasta!
Mikko: Vihdoinkin! Oli jo aikakin! Minulla tulee olemaan niin hauskaa noiden idioottien kanssa…
However, as the race came to a close, a smile formed on Jani’s face, quickly driving the Sedlak into the pit lane, before pulling the handbrake and closing the race with a spectacular skid. Alexandra, Henrik and Kari were there as they watched it happen, before Jani quickly climbed out of the car, slightly tired, but with a smile on his face, before he ran up to the three, and hugged Alexandra.
Jani: Fifth place! Out of 19 people, fifth place!
He was so happy he started slightly tearing up. This was his very first experience racing, and this truly couldn’t be any better than how he envisioned it.
Kari: You did great. We’re proud of you, man.
Alexandra: Jani! I knew you had it in yourself! You were awesome!
Jani: Thanks Alex…thanks guys…
However, just moments after this happy moment, it all came to a close, as Jani remembered something…Y.E.A.R. didn’t finish, their car got destroyed before the race was over, and they were absolutely devastated…
Jani: You…you think we should go and talk to them?
Alexandra: You think we shouldn’t? Jani…they’re our friends…come on, let’s go and at least check on them…
Jani and Alexandra approached Y.E.A.R’s pits, though not before realizing that the situation might be even more of a disaster than previously anticipated. Alexandra let out a sigh, approaching the now-split in half Qua, slowly tracing her hand along the destroyed car, before turning back towards the rest of the team.
Alexandra: Hey…hopefully I’m not disturbing you guys…I…just wanted to check on you, make sure you were alright-
Ryoga: Thanks, that means a lot to us…
Alexandra: You’ve been nice to us this whole time…shit, I feel like that it’s more than fair that we’re nice to you as well…
Hou: Sniffs Y-you tried…tried teaching me how to drive…but…but I s-suck! It’s all my…my fault!
Alexandra: It’s…not your fault, alright? It never was your fault. Everything’s going to be alright, I’m here for you, we’re all here for you, see?
Alexandra would then softly hug Hou, Ryoga and Kanna standing close by as well. Meanwhile, Jani, having noticed Maria on the ground, sat close to her and attempted to make it feel better.
Jani: Hey-
Marìa: Muffled It’s over…it’s all over…everything is gone…in a matter of seconds-
Jani: Anything you need…just ask me, I promise I will help you.
Marìa: Muffled Help with what? I lost my job…I lost everything…even if you offered me to crash at your place…I have a Russian passport, I can’t even get inside Finland!
Jani: Doesn’t matter, anything you need…I’ll help you. It hurts me seeing you like this. Listen…maybe me and Alex could get you some water…I know it’s not much, but you’ll feel slightly better…
Marìa: Thanks-
Jani: Hey, Alex. Let’s go grab a water bottle for Marìa, okay?
Alexandra: There should still be some in the cooler…turning back towards Y.E.A.R. You guys give me 5 minutes, we’ll grab some water for Marìa.
Jani and Alexandra would quickly walk over towards their pits, it was clear that a lot had been done during the night. Beer bottles, cigarette butts, playing cards, energy drink cans, all of that on the ground, all around the cooler. However, as Jani grabbed a water bottle, him and Alexandra would be approached by the rest of the team…and with the rest of the team, two people that were not exactly pleased with everything, Mikko and Daniel.
Kari: Mikko for fuck’s sake, don’t! We did it, fifth out of 19-
Akseli: Here we go again…
Mikko: Will you quit it! Kari! This is personal…now, where was I getting to…oh, Jani and Lexy, how are things?
Jani: Mikko. Daniel.
Alexandra: If two shits could talk, you would be those two. Now what the fuck’s this?
Mikko: Oh, Jani knows full well. What, something about…losing the race perhaps? Or helping the enemy? Or stealing my girl.
Alexandra: You’re delusional if you think I’m into you…seriously? I’m literally a-
Daniel: Shut up! Let him finish!
Mikko: Thank you! Now, where were we. Ah, yes, destroy you and everything you care about. I was thinking…should we beat up the Russian first, or the fatty?
Jani: You’re not touching them! Those are…they’re my friends-
Mikko: Oh, look at that! Little kiddo has grown balls! Let’s see what you can do, come on!
As he finished speaking, Mikko quickly went in for his usual punch to the stomach. But what he didn’t anticipate, was, for the first time ever, Jani actually managed to dodge his attack, before punching Mikko in the face. While it wasn’t strong, it was…disrespectful, to say the least.
Alexandra: FUCK YEAH! How’s it feel, huh? Getting what you fuckin’ deserve?
Mikko: Jani…you little shit…
Jani: Uh oh-
Mikko, with an anger rarely seen in his eyes, quickly grabbed a tire iron from nearby, before he started walking, then running up towards Jani.
Mikko: OLET KUOLLUT! OLET VITUN KUOLLUT! I will turn your brain in pieces you little shit!
Alexandra: YOU FUCKING DON’T!
Before Mikko could do much, Alexandra grabbed him full force, attempting to pull the tire iron from his hand, and landing a few strikes as well, before punching him where the sun doesn’t shine, making him fall towards the ground.
Mikko: A…AAAAAAH! SAATANA! SAATANA! SAATANA!
Alexandra: You fucking psycho, I knew something was wrong with you…I always said that about you, you’re a disaster waiting to happen, Mikko, and look at that! Disaster finally struck! And guess what? You really thought you had a chance with me? I’m a fucking lesbian, Mikko, tried telling you since we met, you’re a fucking idiot. You race just because daddy pays for everything, but Jani did better than you in that fucking race. Look! All your friends, or those you call friends, are they willing to help you? No, they’re fucking not! They just stand there! I could’ve done the same with Jani, but look now! Could it be because he’s been the only fucking person in this squad who’s been decent to me? Now looking at you, on the ground, I can just smile.
Mikko: You…commie…blue-haired…bitch-
Alexandra: Yeah, yeah, get out of my fucking face. Daniel! Samuel! You three either get out of my fucking face right now, or there will be fucking consequences. Go back home.
Daniel: Alright…guys, let’s go, we clearly have no more business here.
Jani: Akseli? Can you drop off the Sedlak at my house? I have some ideas for what to do with it.
Akseli: Sure, sure.
And with that, Mikko, Daniel, Samuel and Akseli left the scene before schedule, finally. Now, who knows what would happen, well, Jani and Alexandra knew what would happen, they brought that water bottle to Marìa, before explaining the situation, and setting up a makeshift table to eat breakfast, finally.
(They’re open if anyone wants to continue)
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Part 10: No bronze, but still a win
including TOTB by @oldmanbuick, Highway Hooligans by @Madrias, YEAR by @Angelustyle, HRSR&M by @Dildoplocus, Trafikjournalen by @Knugcab, mentioning Speed Freaks by @nicxv
Thomas, totally tired, went into the trailer to get another beer, but “just relax a bit”, and fell asleep in the bed… nobody was now doing the radio with Chantal, as Jan was also sleeping…
Chantal: “FUCK, I HAVE HIT THE RAIL! WHAT TO DO?”
Chantal: “ARE YOU FUCKING DEAD OR WHAT? HEEEEY!”
Eric: “This is Eric Carlén from Trafikjournalen, your headlight is now bouncing against your fen… eh, what´s left of your fender. While the sun might raise now, so that it won´t bother you too much, there is potential danger of it falling off and slicing another driver´s tire. Please fix it in the pit´s, shouldn´t be that hard and a five minute job.”
Chantal: “I… eh… will do, yes…”
Chanty did as ordered, and since her mechanic skills are better than one might think when seeing her for the first time, it was even just a two-minute job. Still, she was annoyed that her team didn´t respond, and that made her both angry and insecure, and it ended up in her continuing to drive like a maniac.
A bit later, Hou finally destroyed the Qua in a pileup, because she was trying to find the right gear instead of looking at the mess in front of her. When looking up, she noticed the Globus trying to squeeze through all of this, but it wouldn´t work since Chantal underestimated the size of the huge landyacht she was piloting.
Hou: “CHANTAL! NO! STOP! YOU ARE GOING TO KILL ME, THE CAR IS BROKEN IN HALF! I WILL BE SQUEEZED TO DEATH IF YOU HIT ME!”
Chantal: “I can do this!”
Hou: “NO YOU CAN´T!”
In that moment, Chantals half braincell processed a very, very painful memory from the shitbox rallye where she was also confident but almost killed her team with a misjudgement. In a panic stop she avoided crushing Hou by a few millimeters.
Hou: “Thank …you… for… saving my life…”
Chantal: (desperate crying noises)
Hou: “Are you ok?”
Chantal: “No… not at all…but that is a different story.”
Hou: “I could cry now too, I guess I can´t hold it back. The car is split… I failed, Maria will never forgive me.”
Chantal: “The race is not over. Let me push you!”
Hou: “THE CAR IS SPLIT! YOU WILL KILL ME BY PUSHING ME WITH THAT OIL TANKER!”
Chantal: “I will be careful!”
Hou: “How do you want to push me for 100 laps? No, thanks, I know you want to help us, but it has no use. Proceed racing and make us proud of you.”
Chantal: “Fine… I wish I could help… ARGH, FUCK!”
WIth spinning tires, the Globus resumed racing… and the radio of Hou now wasn´t blocked with Chanty, so she could finally talk to her team. What she did not notice is that the Mishuto passed her… she still thought that she was in the top 3, and drove as hard as possible to defend the third rank against a car that already passed her… neither did Thomas and Jan notice any of this, as they were sleeping. Jan was the first to wake up at 10:30 AM.
Jan: “OH FUCK! I was only getting a short nap, and now I… damn.”
He grabbed some warmer clothes and ran out to watch the track, seeing Chanty still going - but where was the Qua? Jan immediately walked a few meters to the pits, and found YEAR in terrible state.
Jan: “Shit, you´re out?”
Angel: “Yes, because I picked the wrong car.”
Jan: “So did we. Last year, we were completely screwed with a small car here.”
Angel: “Yes, Chanty has told me, and that you barely escaped the wreck alive.”
Jan: "Don´t remind me of that… but it´s true, who isnt used to this demolition derby will definitely learn from beginner mistakes and be stronger the next year.
Hou: “Not me! I will never drive again.”
Suddenly, they were interrupted by a thunder. It was Thomas, getting up still tired, without coffee, with some headache and… seeing his beloved Imperator dented.
“FUCK, MY CAR! WHO WAS THIS? I WILL MAKE YOU PAY!”
Kanna: “We´re dead now.”
Ryoga: “Indeed we are.”
Jan: “Better confess right now.”
Kanna: “Are you sure?”
Jan: “I know Thomas for a bit now. Being honest is what counts a lot for him…”
Just in that moment, Thomas appeared in the pits.
Thomas: “JAN! HERE YOU ARE! Have you seen who fucked up my Imperator?”
Robert Marcel, who could not be convinced to leave his wrecked car alone, woke up from Thomas voice and accidentally saluted.
Robert: “SIR, YES SI… oh… it´s you again… what about my whiskey?”
Thomas: “Soon! See me at noon at the finish line! DISMISSED!”
Thomas then turned back to Jan.
Thomas: “So, have you seen anything or not?”
Jan: “Eh, … eh… not directly…”
Jan helplessly looked at YEAR, but Kanna, Maria and Hou were crying, Angel was exchanging another helpless look with Jan, Ryoga was hiding behind the wreck of the Qua and finally Catherine spoke up.
Catherine: “It was us. But Jan has nothing to do with it. We tried to teach Hou how to use a manual, and… it didn´t work that well in the beginning.”
Ryoga, from behind the Qua: “It was my idea, so… I will make sure the car is as good as new, I promise! Please, don´t blame Hou.”
Hou: “Thanks, sweetheart…”
Angel smiled, since it seems the affection between Hou and Ryoga wasn´t that hidden anymore. Thomas wanted to say something, but swallowed his words.
Thomas: “YOU IDI… ok, let´s sum it up. As far as I can see… you trashed a rental car, rammed my Imperator and other cars, your toy car is out of the race, and… well, you have pretty much fucked up everything here.”
Jan: “THOMAS! Is that really neccecary?”
Thomas: “I was just making sure that it´s inadequate to beat a dead horse. I mean, I really like my car, and it had FUCKING ORIGINAL PAINT! IT WAS A 1981 ROYAL SPECIAL MODEL! Still, …”
Jan: “You still have a heart?”
Thomas: Yes. Go and make some coffee. RYOGA! Follow me, let´s do it the pleasant way, we´ll discuss that matter after I have had my coffee."
Chantal managed to deliver a spectacular show, and crossed the finish line with a wide powerslide before then retiring in the pits, then running to Jan and giving him a firm kiss.
Chantal: “YAAAAAAAAAY! THIRD! Where is the podium? Do I look good enough for the photos?”
Jan: “…”
Thomas: “Ehm, … didn´t you notice that the Mishuto was five laps ahead of you?”
Chantal: “WHAT? But… they were behind me… and I did everything I could, I was as fast as I can, and still… it was not enough?”
Thomas: “Oh, you…HEY!”
Chantal ran away crying, and locked herself in in the trailer.
Thomas: “DON´T DO SHIT IN THERE! PLEASE OPEN THE DOOR OR I KICK IT IN!”
Jan: “Please… come on, we did great, and…”
Chantal: “SHUT UP! I JUST SUCK AT EVERYTHING AND I`LL MAKE SURE YOU ARE RELIEVED OF THAT BURDEN.”
Thomas tried to kick in the door of the trailer.
Thomas: “ARGH! That went better 30 years ago, I swear!”
Jan: “You know what, honey? WE ARE STILL AHEAD OF THAT FINNISH BASTARD! Which means that you were faster than the son of a rallye champion.”
Thomas: “Eh, it was me out there beat…”
Jan: “Ssssshhhhh!”
Chantal: “But… I ruined the podium finish… with my uselessnes…”
Jan: “Come on, you´ll still have the headline in Trafikjournalen. Group A backmarkers daughter beats son of a rallye champion!”
Thomas: “If it was not for stopping my daughter to do something stupid, I would beat the shit out of you, Jan.”
Chantal went to the lavatories, pressed her reset button by showering in cold water, and then finally calmed down after 24 hours of overstimulation and stress she is not able to deal with yet. Still, she seems to be a bit better overall than at Shitbox rallye and indeed, instead of being stuck at teenage years, develop into an adult, which you could also notice when she returned to YEAR.
Angel: “It was really nice that you came and tried to cheer us up, but it´s not an easy task at the moment.”
Chantal: “I know, I am not great at anything, but maybe Alexandra and Jani have more luck. I briefly talked to Alex when I saw her and they want to come over soon… when they are done with hugging.”
Ryoga: “OOOH! Love is in the air…”
Chantal: “You sing like a dead duck underwater and also Alex is lesbian. You better care for Hou now, that would be a love story at least!”
Ryoga turned red and was muted, while Angel proceeded to tell what happened after the DNF, and how Catherine confessed to Thomas.
Jan: “And so, you can look foward again, except for the fact that Maria lost everything?”
Chantal: “Nah! Just material shit. Maria is unable to recognize that her life itself, as, eh being alive, and her family are everything.”
Kanna: “Still, a quite bad situation.”
Chantal: “Nah, totally easy to fix. So, she should buy two lottery tickets.”
Jan: “Eh?”
Chantal: “So, either you win in the lottery or not, so its a 50 percent chance. If you buy two tickets then, one will win. Why haven´t I or anybody else tried this before? IT´S SO SIMPLE TO GET RICH! HOW MANY HOMELESS AND HUNGRY I COULD FEED WITH A MILLION!”
Chorus: “AAAAAAH! CHANTAAAAAAAAAAAAAANTY!!!”
Even when her, hm, maybe not remarkable intelligence, can be annoying at times, she never fails to cheer people up with her funny comments, even if they were not primarily intended to be funny. Meanwhile, at 1 PM, Thomas was done with the preparations for the large party after the race, with Robert Marcel finally having a glass of good Scotch, and Thomas… dancing in a police uniform on his Globus, since … he tasted a bit of the Scotch too, since he had to make sure he´s serving his guests good stuff. As soon as they saw alcohol is involved, the Hooligans were one of the first to arrive.
Cody: “THOMAS! STRIPTEASE NOW! COP UNIFORMS WORK WELL WITH LADIES!”
Mary Marcel: “I BEG YOUR PARDON! WHAT IF I WAS UNDERAGE?!”
Cody: “Don´t you have Barbies to play with so that we can enjoy the really good stuff here?”
Mary: “Hah! I won´t do you that favour.”
Hans: “Eh, Turbo-Tom, first, I was really about to say that it was a pleasure seeing you in action once again after all these decades, but looking at THIS performance now, I am not sure any more!”
Thomas: “You all know what would be great? If we could call my daughter. Because she never listens to me, she might listen to you, you know? So, let´s call her!”
Chorus: “CHANTAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAL!”
to be continuted. Whoever wants to join the party, I am open for it.
6 Likes
Part 11: The final party
including YEAR by @Angelustyle, Speed Freaks by @nicxv, Highway Hooligans by @Madrias, Chitko by @MrdjaNikolen, TOTB by @oldmanbuick and HRSR&M by @Dildoplocus, mentioning Trafikjournalen by @Knugcab
Valentin heads over to where a “party” of sorts was unfolding, initially watching the situation unfold as-is. This didn´t happen unnoticed, thanks to his enormous physical presence, and Thomas, who was about to get drunk, waved him.
“AAAH! HELLO MR. TRANSPORTER! We´ve kept the car in one piece, so that it can be easily loaded… as far as its size permits.”
Valentin is not exactly amused. A fact somewhat hidden by his resting-worried-face.
[to himself] “This is why I don’t drink…”
[to Thomas] “Your car needs to go onto the trailer first because it has to travel further.”
“Oh, so I better step down of it, hm? No problem.”
Thomas slides down over the rear window and the trunk and looks for the keys, until he notices that they are still inside.
“Not that I have much of a choice, anyway. Might as well get going.”
Thomas entered the car and made a quite ambitioned turn, then approached the trailer with a speed that was a bit too optimistic. Since the engine was loud as fuck, Thomas was unable to hear Valentins warnings, and when he noticed, it was almost too late - one of the front wheels went past the edge of the bed, and was now hanging in the air. Thankfully, the car didn´t fall off or crash into the cabin of Valentins truck.
“Ehehe, eh, good that it´s a rear wheel drive car, I fix that in a second.”
Thomas tried to go reverse with full throttle, but except from a bit of smoke and wheelspin (and the bed painting being scraped off from all the stone chips in the tire profile), not much happened. He noticed that by just going reverse, he won´t save anything but only damage the towtruck. Frustrated, he exits the vehicle, while Valentin, visibly annoyed, tried to figure out how to correct the issue.
“I hope you have really good work gloves or can organize some.”
“Sure, but maybe Not…your size. Biggest I have is size 11 for me.”
“I can try and prop up that corner. Though I refuse to tear up my palms in doing so. Hence, gloves or something else to cover sharp edges, I suppose.”
Without even trying them on, Valentin can tell that the gloves are “a bit” too small for him.
“I cannot say that I expected different. These gloves are not exactly my size. The towels hopefully are enough.”
Taking them, he heads to the aloft corner of the car, puzzling around a bit to see where and how Val could try and prop it up…The front fender is deemed the best solution as of right now.
“Please get in and carefully try to reverse onto the trailer…”
This time, Thomas pays a bit more attention, and the car slowly moved backwards, and Thomas could correct the issue easily.
“Well done, Valentin. Hm, on the track the car felt a bit smaller than it acutally is. Good that I hired someone who knows what he is doing. So, I wish you a stress-free drive, since you are driving to… was that Göteborg? first, we should arrive at more or less the same time in Leipzig.”
“Other team needs their car dropped off first, yes.”
Valentin holds up the set of borrowed towels toward Thomas.
“Thanks… oh, there comes Chantal. Either you want her famous hugs and dramatic good-byes… or you better hide now really fast.”
“You want me to hide?”
“Good point… so, either run before she spots you… or accept your fate, haha.”
“See you around, I suppose…”
Valentin heads off in search for the Hooligans, that were also at Thomas after-show-party, though makes little of an attempt at doing so quickly.
Chantal arrived, in company of the YEAR team, at the party that was, now that Thomas got the Globus loaded, resuming.
“HELLO ALL!”
“That´s supposed to be hello everyone, Chantal.”
, corrected Thomas.
“I DON´T CARE. Everyone knows what I mean. Where are the Trafikjournalens, by the way?”
, was the answer, not without some annoyed tone to it, and she grabbed a bottle of booze and took a large gulp.
Thomas: “Those damn boring people didn´t want to come over. Boring swedes, really. They are almost all just like Valentin. YAAAWN.”
Hans: “Girl, you also need a driver nickname like we had in the 80s. How about Chaotic Chanty?”
Chantal: “Seems legit.”
Hans: “You sure you don´t regret drinking booze like that?”
Chantal: “I ruined the podium for us, I need that in order to not hate myself even more than already now.”
Hans: “You have no reason for that, really.”
Angel: “HEY, GUYS!”
Chantal: “mmmmh. You attatched something to me down there, or what?”
Angel: “Eh, yes… I mean no, so, anyway, listen. Chanty, you were voted the driver of the day on the facebook page of the track, most likely for the good show you made out there. Second is Hans for a clean win and almost flawless driving, Thomas is fifth, people liked his defense moves against Mikko a lot.”
Hans: “That was already his special ability in Group A days… you just could not overtake him, but with his impatience, he would spin out anyway sooner or later so that you could pass without any effort.”
Chantal: “Wait a minute… I won something?”
Angel: “Nothing material, but… yes, you´re famous now. If I get your facebook I can link you.”
Thomas: “DONT YOU DARE! SHE HAS ENOUGH PEOPLE USING HER TO WAN…”
Chantal: “SSSSSH!! I dont have that old man social network. Since these competitions are run by old men they propably dont have Tiktok in return. DAMN! By the way, have you seen Alexandra and Jani?”
Angel: “They brought Maria some water, and then ate lunch…”
Chantal: “I`ll get them here.”
As said, she walked over to the speed freaks, seeing Mikko packing his stuff with his “friends”.
Chantal: “Oh fuck, I totally forgot about that bastard. I hope he doesnt see…”
Mikko: “THERE YOU ARE, FATTY!”
Daniel: “And no daddy around, she is more courageous than I thought to come here alone.”
Mikko: “Even better. If you are only half as dumb as you look, you might have forgotten that you ruined MY RACE by being too dumb to use your brakes, and I will not let you get away with it.”
Mikko grabbed the tire iron again, and Chanty froze in fear.
Daniel: “Take that down, that´s not neccecary.”
Mikko: “Punching that michelin mascot with bare hands only will maybe not have any learning effect.”
Daniel: “Come on, I hate that ugly fat monster as much as you, but you´re man enough not to use a tire iron against ladies.”
Mikko: “Yeah, maybe you are right. What´s up, fatty? No screaming for help? Is daddy too drunk again? I heard from some pit chatter that he´s quite a drunkard, and his health is shit… maybe you want to dye your hair black for the funeral?”
Chantal was still frozen, but now silent tears ran down her cheeks.
Chantal: “I…i.i might be fat… but that can not be said about the most important part of you…”
Mikko: “Oooh? You are crying? Are you sad? I would make a party if that geezer finally dies. But I can give you a REAL reason to cry!”
Mikko punched Chantal with a lot of force in the stomach, and she fell to the ground, and Mikko stopped her from getting up with hard kicks.
Daniel: “HEY! Not when your opponent is still on the ground, that´s really over the top. You have taught her the lesson and beaten the shit out of her, that walrus doesn´t even move anymore.”
Mikko: “Let´s hope it stops breathing, too. Come on, how can that even hurt? That´s so much fat there, that biological accident is better armored than a knight.”
Chantal carefully got up, feeling quite some pain absolutely everywhere but not being severely injured, and Mikko started a next attempt to hit her directly in the face, but then, Chantal dodged and hit Mikko back, who did not think of any possible self-defense and… got knocked out, because Chantal let out her frustration and anger all at once, including that from the many times being beaten up at school. Daniel jumped into the car and drove off, leaving Mikko behind, whose source of food might be liquid in the near future, if the cracking noise did not just come from Chantals hand.
Chantal: “See? I am not surprised you got no friends, bastard.”
She spit on him, but being unconscious, he really did not notice.
Catherine: “CHANTY! HERE YOU ARE! Oh… is that…”
Chantal: “Yes, thats the worst thing that was ever made in Finland, yes.”
Catherine: “You knocked him out?”
Chantal, now overwhelmed by realizing what happened:
“BUT HE PUNCHED ME FIRST! REALLY! I DID NOT START!”
Catherine gently hugged Chantal before she would cry.
Chantal: “AAAH! SHIT!”
Catherine: “Oh, are you injured?”
Chantal: “That punch was hard for me, too… damn…”
Catherine: “Fuck, your hand is red and swollen already now. That´s not good, we should get that checked.”
Chantal: “Yes, please get me away from here before I start crying and ruin the cool impression I left…”
An hour later, Thomas was in an uncomfortable situation.
Trevor: "Have you calmed down finally? Can I make the ties loose now?
Scott: “If you ask me, you should not have tied him in first place. I could get him free in a second with my claws.”
Mary: “Wrong. Mikko might have deserved it, but Thomas wanted to piss on somebody being unconscious, that´s not the manners an educated man should show.”
Hans: “But he had valid reasons to do so. Still, I would…”
Thomas: “Call your lawyer, right? Damn, what a softie you have become.”
Alexandra: “ENOUGH! Could you please stop arguing? I have already taken pics of Mikko in the mud in underwear next to our empty booze bottles and mailed them to the Finnish boulevard press before calling the ambulance. Let´s see what daddy says to that. Catherine and Chanty are coming back from the first aid tent, so behave now. Trevor, make him loose.”
Thomas: “Chantal, can you FOR ONCE NOT GET INJURED? Your mother will kill me if I bring you back like this again and we do not have any aliens doing some miraculous healing on you.”
Chantal: “I know, but… he seemed so weak-brained, I didn´t expect his head to be harder than jellyfish.”
Cody: “Did you exchange phone numbers with the aliens? I mean, you could need their cheat code quite often, sweetie.”
Thomas: “None of your business. And only Jan and me are allowed to call her sweetie.”
Chantal: “Wrong! YEAR, Alexandra, Jani, Mary… I can decide for myself who I want to allow that. You are my father, not my bodyguard.”
Thomas: “I need something strong now… ah, here it is, my famous selfmade chili wodka. I made this bottle 8 years ago, so it will be REALLY spicy. The winner has the privilege to try it first.”
Hans: “BAAH! Is that the rocket fuel your daughter has filled up?”
Kanna: “HELP! FIRE! FIRE!”
Robert: “This should be illegal.”
Jan: “It is, because Thomas hasn´t declared it at the border.”
Mary: “Even better then.”
Trevor: “Fucking great stuff. I could use it to remove the paint from our car.”
Alexandra: “Ok, now I think your dad is cool. Great stuff.”
Chantal: “MOOOOREEEE!”
Jan: “Are you su… nevermind, you are an adult.”
Chantal: “You too, but you really need to tell your parents.”
Chorus: “oooooooh…”
Chantal: “At least mine accept the way I look.”
Angel: “Would you mind… not breaking off an argument?”
Hou: “How did you learn to drive with a manual, Chanty? Was it hard?”
Jan: “As far as I know, she made her license at the… 9th exam attempt.”
Hou: “What? But… you don´t drive bad at all.”
Chantal: “It´s more like… I am shit at handling stress, and exam situations are impossible for me. I think I failed 5 with mental breakdowns, one time I crashed, another time I… didn´t even show up because I could not get out of bed, and… I think one was also failed due to me speeding… a bit.”
Thomas: “A BIT?”
Alexandra: “But, how did you pass then?”
Jan: “They cheated.”
Thomas: “No, I didn´t.”
Chantal: “Nobody wants to know that in detail, Jan!”
Cody: “Wrong. We all do.”
Jan: “So, an exam takes one hour, and it has to be in the city and outside of it. After 10 minutes, the instructor told her to drive out to the country roads… and just a few meters after the exit… Thomas took such a fucking large Grand Cruiser and simulated a breakdown, leading to the road being blocked. And since it was rush hour, there was no way Chantal could be ordered to turn around. They sat there in the car for the rest of the time with Chantal… just having to breathe.”
Thomas: “I didn´t fake the breakdown.”
Trevor: “I know it´s a Globus so you usually don´t have to, but I also know you so I guess you did fake it, and it´s a genius move, the longer I think about it.”
Jan: “Thomas sabotaged the car of course to make it look real in case the police shows up, and then failed to fix it again and blocked the road for six hours until he got that thing running again.”
Hans: “That sounds very much like him, yes. But he was definitely father of the year there.”
Mary: (to Robert) “You got some serious competition, I think you need to level up in the dad game. Look, I found very nice shoes here online…”
Robert: “I understand what you mean. How much?”
Thomas: “Weird how daughters seem to be all the same in some things.”
Alexandra: “Not me. Well, I was MAYBE a bit more girly in the past, just like you, Chanty. But just a bit.”
Chantal: “Eh, I… eh…”
Alexandra: “Oh that wasn´t an attack or such. Being a part-time-princess really suits you.”
Another hour later, it has already found it´s peak: Thomas was wasted, Chanty disappeared into the forest for … an urgent problem and was too drunk to open the camping trailer door, then sat on a rock and … started seeing food for a second time, and… Jan was ironically the one still being the last rhino standing.
Jan: "Can someone tell Pi that the electric guitar isn´t plugged in?
Andrea: “Better not, she has some talents but that is not one of them.”
Jan: “So, you play youtube videos on the loudspeaker to make her think it actually works?”
Andrea: “Yes. I mean, she is that drunk, it´s not suspicious.”
Angel: “Thomas isn´t better, first he tells us what a great party he does, and now he is asleep. Wait, where is Kanna?”
Catherine: “She had to throw up and followed Chantal into the forest.”
Angel: “Oh no, how are we supposed to move them back? It´s not that they are… light.”
from the distance: “HYYYUUUUARRRRGGGHHH”
Jan: “That´s Chanty for sure. Her voice is deeper than Kannas.”
Angel: “I see.”
Jan: “Good that you just see and don´t smell. Crap.”
Thomas: “Aaahh, that was good, finally a brief rest. So, let´s continue, I have prepared something. Chantal loves Baileys so… I prepared something.”
Hans: “I am by now scared of what you do even without touching tools.”
Thomas: “Let´s say we have Baileys at home. I made them in GDR the following way: Milk, red wine, a beer, sugar, pepper, and… an egg.”
Maria: “BEURKKKK!”
Thomas: “HEY! Did you just vomit on my Primus??”
Cody: “I think that is an appropriate reaction to both the car and the beverage.”
Thomas: “In GDR we didn´t always have everything, we had to be inventive. And I found out that this reciepe tastes just like Baileys.”
gluck gluck gluck gluck
Kanna: Oh, not that baaaaad… mmmmmhhhh…mooooreee…
Angel: KANNA! YOU ARE ALREADY DRUNK. YOU CANT JUST DRINK A WHOLE BOTTLE NOW!..
Ryoga: At least it was not Maria with her lactose intolerance.
Catherine: Kanna, where the fuck have you left Chantal? She is helpless there in the forest.
After doing the “inside out”, Chanty had a brief momen of orientation, and called her mother with facetime.
“MAMAAAAAAAAAA!!! I MISS YOU SOOOOOO MUCH!”
“Wait, are you drunk?”
“No… a bit… maybe…”
“For fucks sake, your face is full of bruises, your hand seems broken and you are as drunk as a sailor after land vacation!”
“You…are exaggerating a bit…”
“I did not even BEGIN TO BECOME PISSED! GET ME THOMAS! NOW!”
“Wait… a bad signal… krrrrck…eeh… I LOVE YOUUUUUU!!!”
4 Likes
didn’t get tagged for some reason. i was wondering why the last part was taking a while haha.
Any how yay my first podium!
Team Chitco
Part 3
Track time
Most interesting thing that may have happened in first two hours of this period was potential threat of Edward pissing himself while on the track.
Thankfully for both him and Mat, threat turned out to be just some gasses, which were relatively harmlessly emitted into the seat.
This luck, however, wouldn’t stand in the last four hours.
Probably the biggest issue had stemmed from combo of fact Edward’s internals aren’t as young as they used to be, fact Sweden is cold and his overconfidence when drinking during Mat’s stint.
Sudden sensation of warm wetness therefore got responsible for Edward not paying sufficient attention to driving and resulting in him getting into the back of Sedlak.
Sorry, I got a little bit distracted…
Response would likely be anything but good, knowing that Mikko is of rather short temper, especially at this point…and isn’t afraid of expressing it.
Truly sorry, I had just pissed my pants it seems like. Very, very sorry…
Again, very doubtful this would calm Mikko down. Then again, not much would.
Apart from that, we witness a couple of spins: one done by Edward and other by Mat. Likely to blame on some particularly slippery patch on track.
Mentioned:
- Seinäjoki speed freaks (@nicxv)
Pit situation
Sora had realized that black guy was, in fact, just very sad but physically as fine as he could be. Seems she wouldn’t really be needed in regards to her knowledge…Edward was still more than happy to finally get off track and spend time with her.
With that sorted out, I shall attract your attention to carefully chosen part from Wikipedia:
In quantum mechanics, Schrödinger’s cat is a thought experiment concerning quantum superposition. In the thought experiment, a hypothetical cat may be considered simultaneously both alive and dead, while it is unobserved in a closed box, as a result of its fate being linked to a random subatomic event that may or may not occur. This experiment viewed this way is described as a paradox.
Reason for above would be similarly behaving Chicota: while it is known that, starting from 6am until noon, he is in one of two locations… it’s not known in which one until observed.
6am is mentioned due to fact Thomas Nilfert can enjoy some drinking from that point on
Other location would be pits of Highway Hooligans.
Regardless of location, he will attempt to enjoy presence of fellow beer enjoyers. He is bringing several beer crates with him as well…and might receive comments on drinkability of it (cheapest beer one can buy in Sweden likely will not be product of highest quality. He did bought a lot of it, so that might help).
Expect him to also contribute to party organized by Thomas…with beer supply that was already mentioned.
Observing his position in more details will be left to Thomas Nilfert and Hooligans.
Others would follow the race with more or less interest until the finish. Nobody was particularly amused with result, but it could be worse considering it is hatchback lacking in power.
Not to mention it was still in driving condition.
But then we get to really spicy stuff that is the party.
Andrea chimed in as well
"Maybe, but:
- His daughter is here and she might be embarrassed by such a display
- Uhhh…take no offence, but seeing someone old enough to be her dad…or grandpa in such manner may not sit well with fair bit of other females here, which includes me.
Chicota was happy that his drink buddies finally gathered in one place, which meant he could really go all in regarding drinks.
Being able to try out chilli votka was privilege he will not miss out on, either.
He and Raufoss had discussed their experiences with their usual opponents in the wake of fistfight that came between Chantal and Mikko: former preferring to do it the way those two did and Raufoss going for blasting them away with gunshots approach.
Sora had started to form an opinion on Chanty and it wasn’t very good, courtesy of fact she would also be involved in sorting out the hand of blue-haired girl.
Didn’t help that she would learn from Andrea and Pi that this massive presence has tendency to get hurt.
To her credit, Chanty… wasn’t difficult patient, although fact she had arrived in decent state of “drunk” probably helped with that.
Pedro’s children would be busy experiencing their equivalent to drunk by being on sugar rush, which in case of Dennis would be complemented by some painting…but not on paper
There was also an activity of crushing away the cans using a rock: no discrimination in where said cans came from.
Edward took opportunity to get shitfaced as well…because it was most reasonable thing to do.
Belting that he shall be listened to because HE IS A KING got embarrassing to Mat and probably mildly amusing to some others.
Edward took a nap in some mud. Or a ditch. Or a muddy ditch, even. Either way, he was out of it.
Chicota and Dennis also pranked each other: robot was all too happy to mix up bottle of water and some normal votka someone had around. Dennis wasn’t amused when he realized water got very spicy…he barely took a sip, deciding rest of it shall be spilled on something. Or someone.
Dennis decided that this meant war and so Chicota received refills of some of his beer, ranging from piss to cleaning supplies. Victim in this case wasn’t amused either.
Due to him consuming almost entire cup filled with votka by mistaking it for water, Pedro took a nap draped over someone’s hood, possibly of party host. He would be awoken just before big Globus gets moved to trailer, sporting marker-based makeup done by…someone.
Raufoss was opting to get some good beer, not the crap Chicota brought out. Everyone who got properly drunk was judged. Ironically, he also got drunk and took a nap.
Mentioned:
- HeltR SkeltR & Marcel (@Dildoplocus)
- Team Rhinos (@Happyhungryhippo)
- Highway Hooligans (@Madrias)
- Seinäjoki speed freaks (nicxv)
Shall be noted, next part is exactly what it says on the tin. No car involvod, but nevertheless there are injuries.
Beware running drunk.
Look mom, I crash without car!
After Pi demonstrated that she isn’t much of a musician when drunk, she had also shown she is not much of a runner in such state, either.
Or, well, she was actually decent as always, but there was a tree on the way and it kinda failed to yield…
Andrea gasped upon realizing that her friend has gotten out of this crash in…sadder state
Pi! What happened to you?!?
Had…uhh…crash tree…there tree…running and hit tree
Bong will love this. You got something broken?
Do I look like I know the answer?
I had hoped you might…
Dennis hopped in
What happened to you?
Was testing…uhhh…what happens if you run into a tree. Result is…this. Not recommend.
Does it hurt?
Yes.
He decided to let them be
Chanty
What about her? Ohhh…I guess we gotta at least sort you out enough for her to not get concerned.
Not a problem. She will be concerned only about her own injuries. Might not even notice I got some as well.
Chantal was busy examining her breakfast and chatting with her mother, tad bit deeper into forest that Pi kinda smacked into, so for now, she indeed doesn’t notice
In case you need reminder, read last post Hippo posted in this thread until this one.
We will just put something in nostrils to stop bleeding and will just correct…this.
Andrea referring to now-broken nose and she would now set it up as it was. Return to forest resulted in leaves and grass being stuffed up beforementioned nostrils.
That should hold until Bong gets to it. First real injury he would be fixing in long time…and yes, you did got broken in few places.
Fun.
Some time later, when adrenaline and alcohol got thinner in bloodstream…
Oh, this is going to suck…
groans
Mentioned:
- Chantal Nilfert (Team Rhinos; Happyhungryhippo)
3 Likes
Y.E.A.R.
Last Episode (“We raced like never before, and lost like always”)
Post-Race Episode:"Let's try to end things on a good note"
After the race.
It was inevitable that Y.E.A.R. felt really sour about the fact that they didn’t make it. Even 3 hours after the nightmare began, and 1 hour after she ran out of tears, María was as dull as ever.
Hou had personally recovered a bit from her crisis. She thinks she can improve still, but, I’ll take her a lot of effort. Besides, she feels bad with Ryoga, as she was the one who got him into this bit of a mess.
Ryoga was kinda muted. He feels a bit bad about Chantal’s recent commentary on his singing (“If you wanna see a truly horrible singer, watch María”, he thinks rather angry), and also feels a tad nervous by his behavior at the meeting with Thomas.
Kanna had recovered. She was now thinking of going elsewhere. She had little time to socialize during the race itself. And even when she was very sleepy, she was gonna stay awake as long as she wanted… Hell, as long as there was anything to drink, she was staying awake.
Catherine was busy eating at the table. She now felt quite a lot more relaxed, specially knowing what Ángel was doing.
And, now that we say: What was Ángel doing specifically…? He was standing on the table, feeling a bit inspired. And he began…
Ángel:“A’ight, people, we didn’t finish as good as we wanted to.”
María:“Of course we didn’t. We DNFd.”
Ángel:“Yeah, yeah, I’m already aware, like if I weren’t. But, let’s focus on the one positive about this.”
María:“Is there really any positive ?”
Ángel:“María. We at least didn’t finish last.”
María:“What do you mean we didn’t finish last !? If we didn’t finish to begin with !!”
She continued crying on the table. Catherine would’ve shared a burger, one of many she was eating, but, she remembered about how María was also suffering physically and she regretted it.
As María continued crying, however, Ángel remained put, and calmly continued.
Ángel:“I think you didn’t quite get it. Yes, we DID NOT finish. But we were NOT the first to do so.”
María:“Huh ?”
Ángel:“The guys from… What was it ? The Pablato from last year’s Rally, “Honey, I’ve bought a Shitbox”, that, they DNFd. The Hooligans ! The rocker guys in the Ishii ! The Marcel’s DNFd too ! Hell, even the goddamn exocage car went ! Sure, it went after we did, but, it still went ! And I who thought that thing would cause mayhem…”
María:“…”
Ángel:“HECK ! We even defeated THE GODDAMN HOSTS ! We had a significantly worse machine ! And yet with nothing but pure luck, wishes and hopes, we made it further than some ! Hell, with some more we would’ve even made it ! In half, but, we would’ve made it !”
Y.E.A.R.:-cheers-“YEEEES!”
María:“Yeah, that’s all cool, but it still doesn’t quite remove the fact that, 1-, we DNFd, and 2-, that I lost my fucking job…”
Kanna:“Big sis, chill out ! See this as a positive ! You are now unemployed ! Don’t you think you’ve removed a weight you were carrying with that company ? Now you can relax !”
It took María quite a while to understand, but, she soon got the point: she was unemployed, so she had all the freedom in the world.
At this moment, she didn’t quite realize that yet, but, Kanna’s words and Ángel’s speech really helped to motivate the team to keep on going.
Ángel:“Next Year, we will come stronger and better than ever… And if we don’t finish, well, we just have to keep on trying.”
María:“Yeah…”
Catherine:“Next Y.E.A.R., hehe…”
Hou:“Next Y.E.A.R. !”
Ryoga:“Yeah, l-lets focus first on what’s to come… Or, well, the present. Let’s take things easy and hope that on the Shitbox Rally we perform better.”
They then heard about something funny going on at the Rhinos’ side of the track. Hou, feeling a lot more motivated, dragged a less motivated Ryoga, while Kanna would’ve quite happily strolled towards that area too. But instead, she decided to head to Team Chitco’s area for a moment: apparently, she’s heard a Child entered her party, and, of course, given how Kanna is still a bit of a child on the inside, she couldn’t resist. “Beer can wait, for once”, she thinks.
Ángel and Catherine (after lunch) went ahead to the Speed Freaks’ area. Ángel in particular was interested in punishing Mikko in some way or another. Little did they know, but, Mikko (and others) were nowhere to be found, at least for now… They’d later see how Chanty gave him a lesson.
María, meanwhile, stayed there… She honestly wanted both to be alone and at the same time have some company. She felt lonely and pressed up at the same time. Maybe she heard about Chanty’s Strategy to get rich, and she’d try it out in a moment, if she could speak Swedish at all and if there was any store even near Holjes which sold Lottery Tickets.
In that precise moment, came Hans Gustavson, from the team which ended up winning… And also, quite sourly, the very last car Hou crashed into before they ultimately DNFd… He’d heard all kinds of stuff going into the final hours of the race: some guy by the name of Patrick Lindvall was in trouble, Mikko Harjanne leaving the track sooner than expected, mayhem in the Parking Lot with a learner driver, and now, that some woman in the team of the little white Qua had just lost her job.
Maria felt a hand gently touch her shoulder and turned to see Hans with a concerned look on his face.
Hans:“Hey, miss, are you OK?”
Maria wiped tears from her face with her hand.
María:“I-I’m fine… S-Sorry if I’m causing any mess here…”
Hans:“Mind if I sit with you? It’s Maria, right?”
Maria just nodded as tears continued streaming down her face.
Hans sat next to her and paused for a moment before continuing…
Hans:“You know, a long time ago, I was a race car driver. A professional one, not like our amateur event here. It was all I had dreamed of being since I was a young boy. So for a few years, it was literally a dream come true. Until the day I was told my services were no longer needed. And on that day, I looked quite a bit like you do now.”
Hans produced a handkerchief from his pocket and held it out to Maria, who took it and started wiping her face.
Maria took a deep breath and turned toward Hans.
María:“So what did you do?”
Hans:“Well, after a good cry and probably a few too many drinks, I found a new opportunity as a test driver for a car company. Eventually, I moved to a desk job and worked my way up the ranks. And now I still get to work with cars, even if I don’t get paid to race them.”
Maria looked at him.
María:“I-I don’t mean to be rude, sir, but why are you telling me this?”
Hans:“Well, I guess my point is that right now it might feel like everything is ending, but the sun will still come up tomorrow, and you’ll find new opportunities. Speaking of which…”
Hans reached into his pocket and pulled out a business card that he passed to Maria.
Hans:“My company has a Japanese affiliate, Via, and I know some folks over there I can put you in touch with about a job. Come to think of it, I even have a favor to call in since Hirochi still owes me a bottle of top-shelf sake from that wager we made at our last conference.”
Maria looked at Hans with surprise.
María:“But-but why would you do this?”
Hans smiled at her.
Hans:“Well, I heard you worked for a bank, so you must be good with numbers. Financial spreadsheets and the like?”
María:“Y-Yes.”
Hans:“And you’re clearly passionate about your job and about cars, or else you wouldn’t have slapped your company’s logo on your car and come out here halfway across the globe for a race. So if you have useful skills and the passion, why wouldn’t a car company want to hire you?”
María smiled for the first time in a long while. It seemed that her job crisis, while intense, was coming to an end. But before she accepted, she remembered:
“Big sis, chill out ! See this as a positive ! You are now unemployed ! Don’t you think you’ve removed a weight you were carrying with that company ? Now you can relax !”
The words of Kanna sounded right in her head.
Of course, she’d be quite dumb if she denied the offer, so she decided to haggle.
María:“I don’t want to sound ungrateful…but I personally need some time to recover.”
Hans gave her a friendly clap on the back.
Hans:“Of course, take as much time as you need. And if and when you decide you’re ready, get in touch. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I don’t want to leave Turbo Tom unsupervised for too long. The man can’t hold his liquor quite like he used to.”
María:“Thank you… I’ll be in touch.”
Hans turned and started to walk away before pausing and turning back to Maria.
Hans:“Oh, and one more thing. If you do take the job, maybe don’t slap the company logo on your car without approval from the higher-ups. After all, there is a reason why my team is called Team Off-the-Books.”
Hans gave Maria a smile and a wink. She chuckled.
María:“OK… I-I promise.”
Hans:“Good! I look forward to hearing from you !”
Hans then stood up and walked away.
María’s smile really determined how she actually started to feel in a better mood… She could very, very slowly, start to depressurize, and relax.
Just as this nice exchange happened, Ángel and Catherine were having their time with what remained of the Speed Freaks, in other words, Jani and Alexandra.
Ángel:“Hey, guys !”
Jani:“Heyo !”
Alexandra:“You doing OK ? We’re still a bit sorry…”
Ángel:“Ye, we’re good, we’re good. Still a bit sour, but, I guess it’ll eventually pass.”
Catherine:“Where’s… fucking Mikko ?”
Alexandra:“Oh… He’s gone. I got him out of here, that bastard.”
Ángel:"God F’in Damn It !
Jani:“You’re still holding a bit of anger towards him ?”
Ángel:“Absolutely. But hey, I’m glad he wasn’t the one who made it thru the finish line.”
Catherine:“Indeed. Besides, we didn’t do as badly as we expected. Finishing, what… 19, 18, 17, 16… 15th out of 19. That’s better than we expected.”
Alexandra:“Really ?”
Ángel:“I kid you not. We actually were expecting to finish dead last of the field. With such a puny engine, and such puny structural rigidity, we had not too many hopes…”
Catherine:“Hopes which were increasing as we progressed ?”
Ángel snickers.
Ángel:“Yeah… We at some point we’re hoping to finish dead last… of the cars still running, of course. I’m still quite frustrated, I worked really hard on getting the car ready, but, oh, well, it’s best to try next year. I’m not dropping the recipe for “Smaller is Better” though.”
Catherine:“Why not ?”
Ángel:“Unconventional Ideas work better at some point. Next Time we’ll bring something small that doesn’t snap in half.”
Jani:“Sadly we’ll have to wait for a year before we see you again.”
Ángel:“Not exactly.”
Alexandra:“Huh ?”
Ángel was on his way to explain, but Catherine decided to interrupt.
Catherine:“Hey, Milksweet, can you bring me the beers ? I left them on the Minivan. Lunch has made me both hungry and thirsty.”
Ángel:“But… if you just ate like 20 minutes ago… and more than all of us combined in like a day… A-Anyway. Hang on there, I shall bring them in a moment.”
Catherine:“Also, drink some yourself ! It’s no fun drinking alone !”
Ángel:“Honey Bunny, I don’t drink because uhh…”
Ángel was getting flashbacks of the Shitbox Rally this year. He is so weak to Alcohol, that he barely stands a single bottle, maybe even a single can of beer.
Yet still, he went for the beers.
In the meantime, Kanna hanged around with the Chitcos, first to say sorry for the Parking Lot Incident… and second, to socialize with the child that she heard entered her party.
Kanna:“Hey, guys…”
Pi:“Oh, Hi… Anything you need ?”
Kanna:“Well… First, we have to apologize for the Driving Lesson Incident. I mean, we somehow did expect it, but, we didn’t expect it to go so badly.”
Andrea:“It’s OK… Although, given how you all live in Japan, and more specifically, you and Hou live close to each other, I think you should teach her.”
Kanna:“Yeah… And, second, where is the kid ?”
Pedro:“Oh ?”
Kanna:“Well, I heard in my birthday party there was a kid, and I’d love to see him… Reminds me of my youth days.”
Pedro:“You mean Dennis ?”
On the distance, they heard a scream… Not Dennis’s, of course, but, still it sounded frustrated.
Ángel:“The last thing we needed !”
Kanna:“What happened ?”
Ángel:“Well… As if Hou hadn’t wrecked our car badly enough, someone has vandalized it.”
Kanna:“…huh ?”
Ángel:“The art on our car looks childish, like if someone had made it on a really tight… time frame ? But, also, it was made with crayons, so I can easily wash it and make as if nothing had happened.”
Pedro:“Crayons…?”
Ángel:“Yup. I can later wash it off and it’ll be fine.”
While they were having this short chatter, Dennis was hiding behind Y.E.A.R.'s Qua. And was continuing on painting there. Both teams that were talking at that moment were… unsuspecting.
Pedro:“It must have been Dennis then… By the way, ha anyone seen him ?”
Everyone:“…”
Ángel:“Dennis !”
Kanna:“Dennis ? Where are you ?!?”
Pedro:“Dennis !”
They heard some giggling behind one particular car, and the scene was now clear.
Kanna:“Here he is !”
Dennis:“Ah !”
Ángel:“Is he Dennis ?”
Pedro:“What do you think ?”
Ángel:“Yeah… He’s definitely Dennis.”
Dennis:“Do you like it ?”
“It” being the drawings on the Van and now also on the Qua.
Clearly, Ángel wasn’t so pleased, but, Kanna came up with an idea.
Kanna:“Well… You painted our Minivan, which isn’t so nice, but, you can have our Qua for painting all you like.”
Dennis:“Uh ?”
Ángel:“I-I mean… It’s not like it’s worth much for us anyway, so, you can have it. Although, please don’t paint the wheels or the engine… I shall take them out of the car later this evening.”
Kanna:“Why is that ?”
Ángel:“They are still usable. So is the Seat and a few less relevant bits. And also, cos I wanna paint too.”
Kanna:“I shall bring the paint. Hold on.”
And so, as Kanna brought the paint, so that the end result in the Qua would look a lot more uniform, Ángel suddenly remembered about the fact that he’d forgotten to bring the beer to Catherine. And, for as much as he would’ve liked to stay there painting, he felt like it was best to leave Kanna with Dennis. After all, she is much better at dealing with Children than him.
As all of this happened, Ryoga and Hou were about to join the party with the Rhino Squad. Hou seemed far more enthusiastic than ever before, as if she had forgotten all of her trouble a few hours ago.
Ryoga was personally a bit worrisome for once. Couldn’t he enjoy the last part of the day ?
“I don’t want to feel like María”, he thought. Wouldn’t they know, María was also heading to the party to grab herself a drink now that she was in a better mood, and also to socialize a bit more, now that she was feeling better.
Catherine and Ángel were heading there too, Catherine now chugging down the box of beer, while Ángel checked on his phone some polls on Facebook. While Chantal didn’t accept them because it’s an “Old Man’s Network”, Ángel did understand her… After all, who uses Facebook these days when the youth uses Instagram, and TikTok ?
And so, the day progressed rather loosely: and therefore, María got to interact with Robert Marcel a bit… Although she didn’t thought of what to say to him… Maybe sharing some drinks and Schweppes wasn’t so bad of an idea, and so, while she still had the chance to use money, she got to ask Catherine for some beeru… And succeeded.
María:“Hello !”
Robert:“Oh, you’re the… Japanese one, right ?”
María:“Yeah… We got wrecked by our silly Chinese driver on the last stint.”
Hou:“嘿 ！” (“Hey !”)
Robert:“The silly frenchmen decided to get us out of the race… There’s no car anymore, I can’t cover it with the insurance…”
María:“Hey, but… You… You shouldn’t look at things so dark… So did I see them that way… I lost my job because we DNFd.”
Robert:“Yeah… W-Wait, seriously ? How ? Did someone in your team fire you or…?”
María:-chuckles-“No, no, no, no, why would they ? I actually got into my troubles myself. Want a beer ?”
Robert:“Wish it’d have been whiskey, but, oh well, let’s start it easy…”
María gave him one of the Bottles.
María:“…I stamped some… Sponsors, into my car. Let’s say they didn’t got happy once they noticed I DNFd and fired me in the spot…”
Robert:“So the sponsors… you worked for them ?”
María:“Yeah, some bank in Northern Japan, if you wonder.”
Robert:“Well… If I ever get the chance to visit Japan after this, I now know which company not to rely on…”
María chuckled a moment, and then offered Robert some more. This short exchange between Robert and María helped them both to cool their moods down a lot (although they were both cooled down by the time this happened anyway)… not to mention that the drinks helped out too.
Later that Evening.
Yumeisotitanian Hell breaks loose.
Many things happened that night. Chanty beating the hell outta Mikko, for many people’s pleasure, some partying, music, and overall… everyone was having a great time.
Kanna had also come eventually, and ultimately was overtaking herself with the drinks… Even Catherine, who by herself was already a heavy drinker (both in the literal and figurative senses… Although she at least has a whole lot of body mass to account for the Alcohol) was already a bit alarmed by Kanna’s rapid pace.
Catherine:“D-Don’t you… -hic- think you’re going too quickly ? I want some left !”
Kanna:“D-Don’t w-worry -hic–eurp-… I…I d-drank s-since I-I was 14…!”
Catherine:“Since you were… What ?”
Alexandra:“Y-You drank underage ?”
Kanna:“O-Of course I-I -hiiic-, did ! Why would -eurp-… No one do that ?”
Alexandra looked at Catherine. But it was pointless.
Both big girls were the drunkest in the Jap team. Although they weren’t so far ahead…
Hou was close to passing out, and could barely stand on her feet, while saying Chinese Gibberish… Ryoga was the sole thing that was keeping her from falling face first into the floor.
María meanwhile, was close to that same situation. Drunk as hell, she’s feeling at an all week-high, but she’s close to either puking it all out, pissing herself, or having yet again issues with her Lactose Intolerance. She hadn’t realized yet, but she had just drank from Thomas’ Special Bailey’s Recipe.
Ryoga wasn’t so drunk. Still in good enough condition to be self-aware and actually able to do most stuff. Taking care of both Hou and María, he felt a bit overwhelmed. He wanted to play music, same as some others, but right now, he felt like never before… Like if he, for once, actually had a responsibility. Hou was his responsibility now, and he was aware of that. So, he was doing his best to keep up, and he wasn’t doing such a bad job… He would do nicely, as you’ll see later.
And then there was Ángel, our favorite mind-reader, who actually hadn’t taken anything to drink… Largely because he’s self-aware. Every time people have offered him a drink, he’d kindly denied, and when insisted to, he’d say that he’s “unhealthy” when drinking Alcohol and that it wasn’t recommended. And while it was a lie, it worked most of the time. The times he couldn’t deny no matter what he did he simply gifted the drink to someone in the team or to whoever would fancy.
So, what sort of Hell would break loose ?
Well, remember, Yumeisotitanians have powers (this is why I actually put the powers on each character description, duh !)… And Kanna’s suddenly got out of control… First she mind-read someone, without noticing. Luckily, she ain’t like Ángel, and therefore, it wasn’t painful nor noticed…
The next thing was a bit more noticeable… Saying Japanese Gibberish to everyone’s minds while singing in Japanese. While some did notice something was going wrong, some others put higher attention on her singing; even when heavily drunk, her singing was beautiful.
By now, however, both Ryoga and Ángel had noticed something was going seriously wrong. And then it did:
Kanna transformed into a Statue after moving abruptly, now nearly falling on top of Catherine. The big Canadian Girl had to hold for almost 15 seconds before Kanna de-transformed and then transformed again… This process repeated some 10 times that evening, and with different results. At the 3rd time she was holding a bottle of whiskey, which, when de-transforming, ultimately shattered. At the 6th she nearly fell in top of someone else’s car, at the 8th she nearly crushed Hou, if it weren’t fro Ryoga saving the situation and ultimately avoiding all dangers, and at the 9th, she nearly crushed Ángel, who got then nearly crushed by Catherine’s Butt (because she was also too drunk to stand still), and then he got one of his typical Mind Reading attacks.
However, the last incident (the 10th and last) was the one which capped the night off for Y.E.A.R.: Kanna and Chanty wanted to hug themselves one last time before potentially waiting 6 months for the Shitbox Rally next year…
Chanty:“ORR ! KANNA-AAA!”
Kanna:“C-CHANTHYYEEE!”
However, just before they got ready to make a Jump-Hug, Kanna transformed into a Statue one last time, so Chantal got hit in her whole body by what was a Statue. While she didn’t got injured, crashing into stone was… Not the softest thing, and therefore, a scream could be heard far in the distance…
Jani:“What… Was that ?”
Jan:“Oh, shit, was that Chanty ?!?”
Ryoga:“That… Sounded like her.”
Alexandra:“Indeed !”
Ángel:“Is she OK ?”
Ryoga:“Shouldn’t you focus on your big girl ?”
Ángel:“Shouldn’t you focus on your “Mona China” ?”
Jan didn’t got to quarrel and instead got to investigate as the two Yukobaiyaroslavl brothers were having a moderately calm discussion.
Just as that was happening, Chanty was kinda shocked, sitting on the floor, feeling quite sore. If she weren’t so drunk, maybe she would’ve taken the situation more calmly, but…
Chanty:“Kanna…? KANNA !! O-Owww!!! NOOO-OOO!!! YOU’RE NOW A…”
Just as that Happened, Kanna de-transformed back to her human self.
Kanna:“Has something -eeuppp- Happened ? C-Chantyii~~~”
Chantal fainted, due to the shock. And not long later, she puked.
Not long after that, Kanna also puked and blacked-out, falling just on top of Chanty.
And not long after both of those things, Jan arrived, to find both girls on the floor, and stinking to Alcohol.
“Are they… OK ?”, was his first thought before running to ask Ángel (One of the few who wasn’t asleep nor drunk) for some help…
Mentioning:
@HappyHungryHippo
@Dildoplocus
@oldmanbuick
@nicxv
@MrdjaNikolen
(Side Note: I didn’t make the drawings, unfortunately… IRL stuff has really slowed down Drawing Production…
But hey, I at least published… AT LAST !)
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