I love a good Sinday.
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Team: The Communist Expendables
Ivan Dushikov - 57 year old chef from a small family restaurant set out on an adventure after finding a clapped out old communist relic in his Grandmothers barn
John Smith - 25 year old mechanics apprentice at Brivio came out from the UK to help his online friend Ivan achieve his dream, said mechanic does break things a lot sadly but he’s good with cable ties.
The Car?
a 1972 Kelet S120 previously owned by a KGB officer was found in a barn just weeks ago, it was being used as a chicken coop but everything was still there, with some new tyres it was ready to go
edit - car sent before deadline before people get shitty
10 Likes
A rectangle bumper with the same type of bumpers around the sides to make the outline (in different colours) with two bumper bull bars on their side (just hoops) to make the handle and just another chrome bumper for decoration.
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[After a while both Kyle and Jim come back to the car]
“Fucking hoes” Kyle said
“I guess we can just buy one later, fam”
“Dunno. Hey!”
[Kyle spots Connor at their car with the machete in his hand]
“HEY U! Whata think you gonna do there?!”
[With a neutral soft voice Connor responds]
“I am Connor and i may think this is yours?”
[Kyle gives Connor a stern look but slowly takes the machete]
“Thaaaaaanks.”
[Still looking at him he put the machete back into the crate Jim has already placed in the boot]
[Both of them get into their car]
“Why is he still standing here?” Jim says
“I dont know man. He is weird”
“Maybe he is expecting something?”
“Maybe? Drive past him so i can give him something”
[Slowly the car creeps forward until the passenger window aligns with Connor]
“So um We dont have money to give you… so here”
[Kyle gives Connor 4 bottels of vape juice (Watermelon, Coffee, Strawberry and something called “JuiceHouse Special”]
“So yeah thanks again”
[Slowly the car moves away]
“Lets never talk with him again”
“Yeah no”
+1 machete
-4 vape juices, 194 bottels remain
10 Likes
Just curious, when they run out of vape juice, do they die?/ 
4 Likes
Team 2 Girls 1 Truck
Yasmin Rodrigues
23 years old
Isabella Matsuura
25 yo
After the end of Automation D, Yasmin Rodrigues stayed in Japan for exchange studies until the end of the year. After some time she met Isabella Matsuura, a brazillian girl from a japanese family that was living with her grandmother while studying in Japan, they got along really fast and started dating.,
Isabella wasn’t really into cars, but seeing such passion burning inside her girlfriend she started to take a liking for them. Her taste was different from Yasmin, she liked big cars that could go anywhere, so she started to participate in regularity rallies with Yasmin as her co-pilot.
This month they will complete 1 year together, Yasmin wanted to make a surprise and bought a 1990 Gamma Nomad Sport 4x4 for Isabella as a gift, while Isabella had some different kind of surprise, she heard about a competition named The Great Automation Run 2 that would cross Bolivia and Chile and since they both are back to Brasil what better way to commemorate than having a great adventure?
So they took the recently bought pickup truck and decided to use it for their little adventure. They lifted the suspension, fitted bigger offroad tyres, installed a turbo at the 3L I6 under the bonnet and removed the muffler. With this the old Nomad got 45hp extra and was ready to crawl some rocks!
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Team Help How Did We End Up In Here
The Team:
Stefano Sizzling: A 27 year old chef of Italian-British descent, whose pizzerias have always been closed due to numerous health and safety violations. Loves cars and Army stuff. Is an old friend of Harry.
Harry Watson: Went to the same school as Stefano and is one year younger. He’s an aspiring car mechanic, who usually does first and thinks later. May be the only person in the world who actually likes Stefano’s cookings.
Tom: Tom is a goblin who lives under the car’s rear seats, more on him later.
The car:
'00 Birch Serla
A crappy econobox modified by Harry to take on the toughest conditions. With its 2.4L turbo I4 it’s somewhat powerful and economical at the same time. Modifications include an engine tune-up, cosmetic enhancements and a complete rework of suspension, chassis and drivetrain.
At the start before the race starts:
Harry: Oi! Stefano! Wake your lazy ass up and look! We’re finally here!
Stefano: What, at the start? That was surprisingly quick.
Harry: I am quick, except at that one thing.
Stefano: Stop before you even begin.
Harry: Oh come on, I must lighten the mood from time to time. Hey, could you go get that box over there? It should be for us, full of useful supplies.
[Stefano steps out of the car and brings the box from the shore back to the car]
Stefano: Holy crap, this is heavy what’s even in here?
[He lifts the package inside the car and starts rummaging through it.]
Stefano: Well, that explains it. There’s a chainsaw… And a machete!
[He takes the machete out and waves it around]
Harry: Jesus Christ lad, be careful with that! You nearly chopped my bloody ear off!
Stefano: Ok, ok, I’ll put it away. What else is there? Medical supplies… And condoms and viagra? What?
Harry: Well, you know, when we’re in the jungle, just the two of us…
Stefano: No.
Harry: [whispering to Stefano’s ear] …we could use some lovin’…
Stefano: FUCKING STOP, YOU WANKER
[Harry bursts into genuine laughter]
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No, they simply go up in smoke. 
I’ll see myself out. Grab me coat, will ya?
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Oh boy, my team has a chef as well, does this mean there will be a big cook off? 
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Operation BIRD; Prologue IV
Redwood arrives back at the car. Tonsom is waiting next to it for anything interesting to happen. When he notices Redwood being alone, he sinks into confusion…
Tonsom: “What? Why are you alone? Where is Connor?”
Redwood: [calm] “Well… we tried to get the machete out. And… we did, although not very conventionally…”
Tonsom: “What do you mean by not very conventionally?”
Redwood: “Well… Connor apparently thought far enough to use leverage and his legs to get it out. I just went to be his ground anchor…
And since he is better at waiting, i left him there to hand the machete back.”
Tonsom: [slightly smiling] “Boy that must´ve looked hilarious.”
Redwood: [
] “Yep. It did look like two guys doing yoga excersices…”
The two turn around and move over a few feet to have a direct line of sight at Connor and the Machete´s owners.
[not heard by Tonsom or Redwood]
Tonsom: “At least he managed to not start a fight…”
Redwood: “Why would he?”
Tonsom: “You really asked?”
Redwood: “Sorry…”
Tonnsom: “What the fuck is he doing?”
Redwood: “Trying to trade? Maybe we can stock up some more money…”
Tonsom jokingly punches Redwood. Then he pulls out a 1994 Quarter-Coin.
Tonsom: “Connor and trading? How is that gonna work? I have the only 25cents he had.”
Redwood: “Wait… He got alcohol??”
Tonsom: “Looks like it…”
Connor walks towards the Mimas, for some reason holding all four bottles using his left arm/ hand and none in the right.*
Tonsom: [facepalm] “He really got alcohol…”
Redwood takes one of the bottles. It reads “Vape-Juice; Strawberry”.
Redwood: “It apparently is vape-juice…”
Tonsom: “It is what?”
Redwood: “Vape-Juice. The liquid used to essentially “refuel” Vapes.”
Tonsom scratches his head in confusion…
Connor: “Vaping is considered a more healthy alternative to smoking. It combines the intake of nicotine while only inhaling water vapour and some flavouring additives.”
Tonsom: “Genius strikes again…”
The three store the bottles in the trunk.
Redwood: “What are we gonna do with those?”
Tonsom: “How the fuck should i know?? I thought you could use all that modern youth shit.”
Redwood: “Well… i can´t. And Connor likely can´t either.”
Connor: “Correct.”
Tonsom: “Let´s just wait for race start then… really getting bored here…”
to be continued
*the “only left arm carry” from Connor move will play a major role in Stage two, i am not gonna spoil too much tho
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Well.
First comes the withdrawal.
And then who knows what will happen
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Team Shitbox Brothers!
And a few minutes before the race began, a lifted muscle car found its way into the shore where the race would start. Inside of it, two known faces. The Shitbox Brothers are here!
(Just imagine they are wearing Rambo-like hair bandanas)
The car: A 1985 Vega Saetta Mk4, EP Trim. The already muscular looking coupé has received an appearance and offroading package made by the Brothers that makes it look even more intimidating, as well as offroad bits and parts.
17 Likes
Team Bozo-Cross
“I swear by all that is holy, Adam, if you don’t stop checking out these cars we’re not gonna have a lot of time to prepare!” Barked Dave.
“Sorry Dave, you know I can’t help myself, especially with the crazy work some of these guys have done. Did you see the limo?!” Answered Adam, giddy as all can be.
“Yes, I saw the limo, those idiots are gonna die, probably. Anyway, where the hell is Nate?”
“Beats me, I last saw him making racing noises in the car.”
After looking around a bit, Dave and Adam finally found Nate hiding underneath the car in a fetal position.
“Good lord Nate, what are you doing?!” Demanded Dave.
“Have you SEEN those 2 girls there? I swear to Christ eyes like that are NOT natural! And that other team is called brothers when one of them is a girl and I’ve been having a mental breakdown about it and I want to go home and I-”
Nate was interrupted by a slap by Dave and an awkward silence for a few moments.
“Anyway,” said Adam “I think we got a good chance, some of the other cars look like death traps, I’m not even sure if they’ll make it to the finish line!”
“Yeah, they’re gonna need a lot of luck, and the more I look at this jungle, the more I think we’ll need it too.”
6 Likes
Confession: I got the idea from your post, I was looking at it and thought: “Odamn the other guy could be a chef”
So thanks for the idea I guess 
The cook off idea is pretty great though 
1 Like
Team Wonderbolts, Prologue Part 2
Xsara and Moira arrive at the start line, finding their car of choice waiting for them.
[X] “So, here we go.”
[M] “If I read the ad right, she’s got a 2 litre, inline-5 turbo, 309hp, AWD, a solid rear axle and independent front suspension.”
Xsara walks around the 1989 Triton Ranger 4x4 Raid, giving it a once over.
[X] “It looks very rugged, just like a Dakar spec car should be.”
Moira then points out an ammo crate in front of it.
[M] “You think this has our supplies in it?”
[X] “I suppose so.”
*The two of them lift the crate onto the bonnet of their Ranger and empty out the contents."
[X] “So, we got a machete, a chainsaw, plasters, antiseptic, some viagra, and condoms.”
[M] “Well, I can see the point of the first four items, but those last two… just why!?”
Xsara shrugs as she loads the supplies into her car.
[X] “Heck if I know, but the organisers must know we’ll need them at some point, meaning they must be important and need to be kept.”
[M] “That’s true.”
Moira then looks around the rest of the teams.
[M] “There’s quite a selection of cars here: an ex-rental, a limo, pickups and SUVs. It’ll be interesting to see which can make it the furthest and finish.”
[X] “Well, we’ll at least finish. Our car was built for some of the terrain on the route.”
Moira nods in agreement.
[M] “Again, true.”
The Car
Manufacturer: Triton
Model Year: 1989
Model: Ranger 4x4 Raid
The Triton Ranger 4x4 Raid is a much more beefier version than the regular Ranger, built for the Dakar rally. Featuring an AWD system, raised suspension and powered by a 2 liter inline 5 turbo. The one Xsara and Moira bought is an ex-Triton factory team car, de-tuned slightly for regular road use, which means it now produces 309hp, with a fuel economy figure of 12 mpg (UK). Let’s up the choice for Team Wonderbolts is a decent one.
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just thought about it…
some cars entered might be able to fly well below the radar in terms of cops.
They are SO unsuspicious nobody will think they were taking part in a race…
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That’s why my car is basically stock.
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I’d definitely say my car is extremely subtle and unnoticeable…
…Mainly because I have the same amount of light energy on board as a small sun and you can’t notice anything if you’re blind!
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We’re in a lightly-modified former rental car. We’re about as low-key as it gets. Well… Except for the fact that we’re totally going to neutral-drop the car when the flag gets waved.
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Team Run N Gun
Prologue
A week before the race starts…
It had been a fortnight since our first contact with the FSB. Ben and I were offloading a shipment of M4 Carbines in Guajara-Mirim when we saw a big black Ardent A150 with four well armed Slavic looking guys inside. It was parked down an alley facing a street we’d planned to use to leave the site of the gun deal. After the local militia guys paid us and headed out I let Ben know what the militia leader had warned me about…
S: “Hey Ben! We all ready to go?”
B: “Yeah, no more crates, lots more money and a free souvenir!” brandishes a M79 grenade launcher and belt
S: “Sweet! I’ve got some bad news though… Ricky saw something we may have to deal with, pronto”
B: “Fuck! It’s the FSB.”
S: “Maybe, maybe not… Let’s check 'em out and see”
After I grabbed my trusty Uzi and Ben scooped up his AK-M to add to his arsenal of weapons, we tactically made our way to the alley where the goon squad was parked…
S: “Let me scope 'em out first. No point killing local Law or DEA agents since they aren’t after us.”
B: “Just do it, this shit has ambush written all over it!”
I pulled out a 6x rifle scope from my belt pouch and looked over the car and occupants as well as I could…
S: “Looking, looking… They’re armed with AK-74S carbines… They’re wearing Soviet era kit… Wait! someone’s coming!”
We made ourselves as minimalist as possible as a figure, flanked by two armed guards, came over to the window of the Ardent and gestured to the men inside… I was still scoping them out so when the central figure glanced towards our end of the alley, I was transfixed! The figure was Valerie!!! Clearly older but still impossibly beautiful, her bored glance swiftly transformed to shock… Ben had stood up and was firing the M79!
The Ardent and it’s crew never stood a chance; the 40MM HE shell landed just behind the cab, in the tray bed. The explosion was deafening and blinding. I was thoroughly disorientated and was lucky that Ben had the wits to keep his head about him. Ben dragged us clear of the killzone and we ran/stumbled back to the shed where our SUV was parked and made a swift getaway, back to Bolivia…
We had further run-ins with the FSB kill teams and we had to shut down our arms smuggling work indefinitely. I got in contact with a DEA agent who agreed to extradite us to the US in return for our smuggling information. He’d entered us into the GAR: Bolivia as cover to flee the country and it was he who dropped another bombshell on our heads…
S: “Frank!!! Long time no call! Wassup buddy? Everything OK?”
F: “Potentially bad news, I’m afraid… There’s a member of the race who could be family! Team… Old but Gold, Name’s Richard Smith by the way… A rich industrialist from the UK. File says that he’s related on your mother’s side but it could still be an elaborate ruse.”
S: “Shit… I’ve heard of Ol’ Richie Rich. Bastard’s a tight-ass who won’t share his wealth with anyone, unless they give him something first… shudder I’ll be careful and thanks for the heads up!”
F: “No problem, your boys evidence will see some really big fish being taken down, finally, so stay safe and we’ll make sure you both get new identities and can live out the rest of your days in peace…”
S: “Thanks Frank, see ya in Arica!”
25th August, 2018 at 19:46PM, Local time…
We arrived at the start line without any incident. Ben and I settled down to wait and scope out the competition. Time passed. We were then approached by members of the race organisation and given a crate. Inside was a chainsaw (Chinese, most likely), a machete (I took that since Ben already had one), Bandaids and antiseptic (added to the first aid kit), Viagra and condoms (stashed in the glovebox).
We’d also done our own packing; a couple weeks worth of MRE’s ensuring we won’t starve to death, spare tyres and our packed tent on the roof, spare fuel, oil and water inside the rear cabin and a pair of Glock 17’s (Ben and I openly wear these; Ben’s on his RH outer thigh and mine is in a shoulder holster). We’re also carrying extraneous camping gear like a stove, cookwear and utensils, plus extra clothing and treasured personal items, since we’re never coming back…
TO BE CONTINUED
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