Round 4 Reviews
1985 Madison Ballista 350 GT
Madison had already proved in the late 70’s that a competent, fun sports car was possible under Federal regulations that many thought would permanently kill performance. Of course, with the boom of computer technology in the early 80’s, Madison once again decided to show the public the definition of “possible.”
The Ballista 350 GT had, as could be figured out from the name badge, a 350 CID (5.7L) V8 motor in it. Thanks to computer fuel mapping and mulit-port injection, this beast jumped up to 280 horsepower in 1985. That was good enough to propel the Ballista to 60 in a mere 5.7 seconds, and give it a top speed of 170 miles per hour. This car, single-handedly, represented the nail in the coffin to the “there will never be performance again” argument.
It was, indeed, a command performance, with the Ballista 350 GT sweeping the amateur and pro-am sports car race circuits three years in a row. And to this day, the Ballista always has its spot in car shows and vintage racing events.
Scores in: Mainstream Culutre - Hot Rods and Sports Cars, Mainstream Culture - Retro Motor Sports
1985 FM Overlander
Slow, old, unreliable, clunky British SUV. A lot of people will tell you this when you ask about the FM Overlander. Even “car guys” will tell you this. The thing is, it’s not really true.
Peoples’ perceptions of a car model take decades to change, if they even change at all. FM fell victim to this in the mid-80’s. Through the lens of time and documentation, we can see now that it was actually a good, solid, reliable “early” SUV. So why does it have such a horrible reputation?
Well, because after the Oil Crisis, most Americans got notoriously cheap, particularly at the pump. Gas is gas, right? Go juice makes the car go. Well, what happens then is that the owner of the lovely new FM Overlander then proceeds to ignore the “Premium Unleaded Fuel Only” stickers on the gauge cluster and inside the fuel door, and proceeds to put whatever base-grade garbage they can find into the tank. This also explains, in hindsight, why Overlanders in Idaho had particularly short lives, as their regular unleaded is only 85 octane, not 87.*
Both my father and uncle owned FM Overlanders in the late 80’s, and my uncle’s is still running beautifully today at just over 200k miles. Dad’s was totaled in a wreck in 1997, sadly, but had no problems prior. Why? Because they actually took care of their cars. Thankfully, there were at least some other owners who took care of theirs, and enough proper gearheads to resurrect and maintain a small fleet of these old trail beasts.
(*)Meta Note: This is AKI, not RON. Fuel is rated at the pumps and in the owner’s manual in AKI here.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Classics, Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
1985 Kaizen FC22 (TU1)
The 1985 Kaizen FC22 is a case study in opposites, when compared to the FM Overlander. The target audience of this techno marvel was much more affluent, and used to performance cars that required better fuel. By comparison, only a handful of Kaizen FC22 met their end by knocking themselves to death.
This was an entirely new breed of car from Japan, however, with some manufacturers moving away from their “cheap, reliable, and economical” image to launch contenders squarely in the premium market. Gone were the days of vinyl and corduroy fabric seats, eco-tuned 4-cylinders, and carburetors. The FC22 arrived on the scene with firmly bolstered leatherette seats, air conditioning, fuel injection, and even more advanced technology such as antilock brakes. Yet it didn’t lose part of its roots: the 5-speed manual gearbox turning the rear wheels.
It was no Madison Ballista for pure speed, but unlike a Madison Ballista, you could bring your friends or family with you, and enough luggage for vacation. Indeed, the Kaizen FC22 was the herald of a new attitude towards the application of performance.
Today, it is not lost to memory. Any decent-sized car show will have at least one present, hopefully in relatively unmolested condition.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1985 Hessenburg 2000 RSi 16v
The world didn’t stand still while the US got its act together in the late 70’s. While emissions were being sorted out Stateside, overseas companies were evolving their products for their own markets. With economy cars as precursors, some models developed as an interesting mutation: economy cars with excellent performance. Hessenburg launched one such car in 1985, the Hessenburg 2000 RSi 16v. And they never sold a single one over here. For that matter, no one could get their hands on one until 2000 due to import laws.
Even back in 2000, 138 horsepower would not have sounded incredibly impressive. Most economy cars had somewhere between 90 and 130, after all. But those in the know understood that, in 1985, this was a monstrous number from a 1.8 liter 4-banger. They also understood that performance would be excellent, as the car would be almost 1/3 lighter than their modern counterparts. And, like the FC22, the 2000 RSi had an early ABS system. Unlike the Japanese sedan, Hessenburg kept the front-drive layout, creating one of the earliest examples of the “Hot Hatch.”
It was a formula that would dominate Europe for decades, yet something that still would have a level of novelty in the US and Canada for just as long.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Import/Export
1986 Schnell LX20 LSi (T45)
Schnell’s LX20 LSi was already late in development when Kaizen dropped the FC22s into the market, complicating Schnell’s North American plans a bit. This unexpected move into territory that the German automaker was attempting to claim may have caught executives flat-footed, as the LX20 seems to pale a bit in comparison to its Japanese competitor.
Frankly, the Schnells were just not as well put together or packaged as nicely as the Kaizen. No leather. Older non-variable power steering. Poorer interior layout and ergonomics. The FC22 looked like it would sink the Germans before they ever got started. In reality the competition between the two was much more fierce than anyone anticipated. The Schnell LX20 LSi was a fair amount cheaper than the FC22, and straight-line performance was better. It wasn’t until the first long-term reliability reports came out that the Kaizen gained the edge for good. Though, if you wanted a bit of a thrill in wagon form, Schnell was there for you.
But it was a hell of a run for Schnell, and this journalist always appreciates seeing both models together at car shows.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars, Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars
1984 Cabrera Fulgor Turbo
TURBO, BRUH!
Yeah, in the 80’s, turbos were really just used for one thing: more power. Early fuel mapping wasn’t good enough to make a truly good small displacement, efficient engine, unlike today. So instead, manufacturers used them as a tool to sell hot versions of their regular cars.
And then, enter Cabrera. Their partnership with a certain American automaker gave them the idea they could do both. In 1984. The result was the 108 horsepower, 1.5 liter, Cabrera Fulgor Turbo. It was touted, paraphrased, as an economy car with balls. Well, it definitely took some huevos to introduce Americans to a turbocharged economy car… that still used a carburetor, and an outdated 4-speed manual.
Who would buy such a thing? Really, in many cases it just boiled down to buyers wanting to give the finger to the rest of the auto industry. But for others, it was because the car was cheap and got decent gas mileage. To their credit, Cabrera managed to sell more of these than anyone (except Cabrera) expected. Negative attitudes towards earlier Cabrera models probably didn’t help, nor did a recall on early models for carb seals being blown out by the turbo.
We do wish more of these had survived, or that their original or familial owners would give them up more readily for restoration and enjoyments, but at least they exist, floating around out there in the vast automotive world.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Classics, Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics
1982 Keystone D3500 ST Savant
Perhaps predicting the upcoming wave of performance sedans, Keystone released their all-new flagship D-series in 1982. Because of their British roots, Keystone did something that their later competitors didn’t do: release a 5-door liftback version. It wasn’t just available in a stripped down version, either. The example shown here, from a recent major car show, is the top-trim ST Savant, with the 5-speed manual to boot.
Despite being early in the wave, Keystone seems to be a bit forgotten, at least by performance enthusiasts. Keystone only squeezed 171 ponies out of their 3.5 liter V8, though to be fair the engine was based on a pushrod four-cylinder that was already 35 years old at the time. This, and the larger body, meant a 7.6 second jaunt to 60 (only a ittle faster than a Cabrera Fulgor Turbo), and a 124 MPH top speed.
Instead, Keystone focused their energy on cabin experience. Vibration and noise was damped surprisingly well for the era, and both standard equipment levels and user ergonomics were also quite good. Overall driving experience was said to be solid and fun, but not nearly as crisp or exhilarating as the FC22 or LX20.
Keystone continued their policy of encouraging independent race teams to use their vehicles, leading to a number of wins and podium finishes in pro-am touring classes between 1982 and 1986.
There was a facelift in 1984 that brought the North American version of the D-series in line with the European D-series design language.* Interestingly, this makes the 1982 and 1983 D-series among the rarest cars, and even parts cars with good front ends are highly desirable.
( * )Meta note: Originally a 1984 was going to be submitted, but HighOctaneLove had difficulty designing the front end with “euro” light fixtures looking good. If anyone wants to take a crack at designing the 1982 Euro/1984 World facelift for fun, please let me know.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Mainstream Culture - Retro Motor Sports
1985 Bazard Tormenta (PE)
Some readers are going to scratch their heads and wonder why we included the Tormenta in our list. Was there anything that really stood out about it?
Yeah, but not in a good way. Those of us who grew up or were young adults in the late 80s and early 90s remember seeing Tormentas broken down on the side of the road basically every day. We’d be riding along in our FM Overlander, and Dad would laugh, or mumble some complaint about garbage American cars and how they didn’t build them like they used to. When I was a kid, I never understood why anyone would buy one. I mean, if everyone knew they were so bad, why would they buy them?
Brand loyalty is a hell of a drug, I guess. Many years later I got to drive one, and it was very much like driving a couch. It was a great thing, and simultaneously a terrible thing. So comfortable to ride in, even after 25 years, but also so dull to drive. 157 horses was pretty good for the time, but the whole car just felt like a morphine shot before surgery.
It explains why so many ended their existance as demo derby cars. Those that show up at car shows? Again, I didn’t understand until recently. But nostalgia is a hell of a drug, too, and I guess if you grew up sitting in the back seat of a broken down Tormenta, you get it.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars, Counter Culture - Motor Sport
1986 Armor Streethawk
So, the 1980’s sports sedan war went a little like this:
Britain in 1982: Hello, we would like to introduce you to this comfortable, quick, stately car. We think you’ll be chuffed.
Japan in 1985: Konichiwa. Your hatchback is too soft and slow. Please accept this not-so-humble sedan, and let us show you the wonders of multivalve setups.
Germany in 1986: Anhalten. You cannot claim victory, nein. We will show you what a turbocharger can do, ja?
…
America in 1986: Screw you, we’ll do it with multiple valves AND bigger displacement. U - S - A! U - S- A!
So yeah, that would be the Armor Streethawk. Did we mention that the Streethawk was the biggest of the four, yet still the fastest to 60 at 5.8 seconds? Indeed, the Streethawk was what you bought when you wanted a Madison Ballista, but had kids, and didn’t care if you rattled their brains out.
The Streethawk was pretty unapologetic as far as a sports sedan went, which was a bit of its own undoing back in the day. While the performance was clearly there, the demographic that could afford such a toy was often middle aged or older, and the jarring ride was a detractor, and they were more likely to choose the slowpoke Keystone. Young, rich professionals, on the other hand? Right up their alley.
And, of course, finding a big modern or twin-turbo 6 and cramming it under the hood is about the most Streethawk thing you can do to a rolling chassis, these days. It would just be in keeping with the tradition of the model.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Muscle/Pony Cars, Mainstream Culture - RestoMod
1981 F&S Jikan Triple Threat
I’m a little too young to really remember these too well, but I do remember seeing a few broken down on the side of the road, with venomous comments from my Dad, similar to the ones he made towards the Bazard Tormenta. Then I forgot about them until recently.
It was only when I was doing research for this series that I came across the F&S Jikan Triple Threat, and why I never really saw them anywhere. As it turns out, their tiny sub-1 liter 3-cylinder turbo engines were, not to anyone’s great surprise, unreliable. And the Jikan was a bit of a throwaway car to begin with, being an economy car and price-point competitor to the Cabrera Fulgor.
But in my research I also came across some interesting videos. One was of a restored Triple Threat tearing up an autocross course thanks to its light weight, and another was a vlogger doing a cross-country trip in his Dad’s old Triple Threat.
This is further proof: If something exists, someone is an enthusiast of that thing.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics, Counter Culture - Motor Sports
1982 STAG MTMWV Civilian Berserker Pickup Convertible
And this week’s winner of the “longest official name of the week” goes to…
We’ll just call it the Berserker for short.
That, of course, is the only thing short for the Berserker around here. The vehicle itself is a full-size, quad-cab pickup based on the military version. Big, heavy, tough as hell, all the things that Muricans like in trucks. While quad cabs had been around in fleet form for a couple decades, the Berserker was probably the earliest example of a quad-cab pickup being financially viable for an automaker on the basis of consumer sales.
It’s also very much a counter-culture truck in the show world. “Yeah, your truck has a square body? Not only is mine more square, I know where to weld in a hardpoint for a machine gun on mine.” Weird flex is the MO of the Berserker owner.
Speaking of machine guns, there are plenty of civilian-built Berserkers that have them mounted. None in this country, though. Think Middle East and Africa. If there’s a civil war somewhere, there’s one of these with a machine gun, guaranteed.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Classics, Counter Culture - Import/Export
1984 Kazuki KZR 2200
Kazuki found a market niche to cater to in 1984 with their KZR 2200. Besides Keystone and their Q-series, no one was putting out a reasonably priced sports car. And while its 2+2 configuration (thank you, unnecessary tariffs) didn’t make it a sports car in the purist’s sense, the KZR2200 definitely fit the bill as far as feel.
It was plenty powerful, without being overpowering. Handling was crisp (for the day), and the cabin was actually pretty spacious for its size. Of course, never put anyone larger than a small child in the rear seats.
So it wasn’t a surprise that it sold well, and that a very good portion of them are still on the road to this day.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars, Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics
1984 Bricksley Kingsnake 464 Pressurized
If there was one thing that you could count on Bricksley for, it would be consistensy at all costs. Despite the Oil Crisis and legislation in the aftermath such as CAFE, Bricksley continued to offer mammoth engines with poor fuel economy.
This led to a major spike in cost of models such as the Kingsnake 464 Pressurized, as they fell below the minimum line to avoid the “gas guzzler” tax of the 80’s. This additional tax, without a corresponding feature increase, definitely took a bite out of sales. Still, some rich buyers whose sole goal in life was “let’s see if we can make tires cry” would still end up buying the Kingsnake.
Because the point of the Kingsnake 464 Pressurized was merely obscene power, a cottage industry (and later cult following that persists to this day) popped up, trying to see just how much power one can squeeze out of a 7.6 liter turbocharged straight-6. Spoiler alert: a lot more than the 400-ish horses that were stock under the hood.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Hot Rods and Sports Cars
1986 Ivera Executive (North American version)
After more than a decade of shifting attitudes brought on by lack of reaction by the American auto industry, a phenomenon happened sometime in the mid-80’s: THE luxury car to have was no longer American. It was Swedish.
Having slowly built up their following and reputation over more than 2 decades, the 1986 version of the Ivera Executive was released in the US as a flagship car. Not only did Ivera upsell their loyal customers, they successfully captured a good number of traditional American buyers. With the Executive’s almost dream-like road manners, strong motor, and exhaustive list of creature features, it was no wonder.
Now, even though the Executive was a smashing sales success, it was still produced in much smaller numbers than its passe American counterparts. Finding one in restorable condition requires patience. Restoring one requires even more patience, and a large wallet. But for the peak of 80’s cool luxury, nothing can beat the Executive.
Scores in: Mainstream Culture - Classic Cars
1981 Ryuji Shogi 4x4
Ever expanding their product lineup, Ryuji sent us yet another brilliant gem in the early 80’s. The Shogi compact pickup was an absolute hit with post-Oil Crisis buyers looking for a pickup that didn’t drink like their aunt at Christmas. While it would have been good enough for them to simply flood our shores with small RWD trucks, they gave us variety as well.
Take, for instance, this Shogi 4x4 here, found at the local monthly meet. No, that’s not actually lifted. That’s how tall they were from the factory. They were absolute beasts off-road, able to navigate in areas far too tight for traditional SUVs and pickups. Yet they were still big enough to get the job done for dump runs and home improvement. Plus, do we even need to mention that absolutely cool 80’s movie that featured one?
If you’re interested in picking one up, however, we have to strongly urge you to get the frame thoroughly inspected and any rust addressed. The Achilles heel of the Shogi back in the day was its poor crashworthiness, and frame rot can turn your project into a fatal nightmare.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Motor Sport, Counter Culture - Classics
1984 IP Commuter “Penny Pincher”
If there was ever a quintessential economy car from the early 80’s, the IP Commuter would have to be it. Cheap, reliable, easy on fuel. Not the best ride in the world, but you can still flog it to death and it will come back for more.
There was absolutely nothing exciting about the Commuter when it was new, but that didn’t stop people from buying them by the tens of thousands each year. A Commuter might have been an extension of some people, like another body part. One of the first documented million-mile cars in the world was an IP Commuter that belonged to an auto parts courier. Their relatively awkward suspension was acually a boon on forest service roads, so seeing them at trailheads was a common sight (and still possible to this day).
Now, seeing an IP Commuter, particularly the thrifty “Penny Pincher” is absolutely exciting. It’s a testament to a car that just kind of “existed” so subtlely yet carried so many families. A testament to durability. A testiment to what was possible during a transition of eras.
Scores in: Counter Culture - Spiritual Classics, Counter Culture - Jalopy Culture
