Luke looked at the car in the fifth parking bay, a small black coupe, the Smooth Astala Vi.
“Interesting. This is the first two-door car I’ve seen so far. Also a menacing shade of black. Thick 4-spoke rims, that’s a little interesting. Certainly unusual. And that’s unmistakably a carbon weave under that black paint on both the car and the wheels. Also a big sunroof. Very sleek, minimalistic, but the minimalism gives it aggression. Also the first car to feature a hood ornament. Air vents in the hood, that’s promising. Yet for as sleek as the car is, the window area is impressive. It’s a mix of old-school muscle car and new-school super car.”
Luke then opened the door, and settled into the seat.
“First two-seater, and the interior’s fairly impressive. Not as high a quality as the Straton had, but still obviously hand made. Same with the HUD, it’s not as packed with features as some of the Astala’s competitors, but it hasn’t skimped on tech. Not quite as many air bags as in the other cars, but… maybe that weight savings will have a benefit on gas mileage. Paddle shifters, made of rather thick titanium for structural integrity. This particular gearbox is a 6 speed double-clutch sequential, so, again, setting itself apart. Electric differential controls with torque control, designed to aid in vehicle handling by sending power to the outside wheels in a corner. I like that a lot. Should cut a fast lap time when I go to test that.”
Luke found the hood release mechanism, giving it a careful pull, then stepped out of the car to look at the engine.
“Nice use of chrome. V8, DOHC, magnesium block, AlSi heads, 4 valves per cylinder, so she’s another member of the VVL team. 3.2 liter displacement, so it’s one of the smaller engines in the bunch, but, we’ve seen that displacement isn’t always everything. Especially as it’s wearing a pair of snails. Throttle per cylinder with performance intakes, so it’ll breathe easy. Direct injection, air-to-air intercooler. 9200 RPM redline, 393 horsepower at 8600 RPM, 310 ft-lb of torque at 3500 RPM. Balanced overall, but currently the lowest horsepower, though also in a car that doesn’t weigh much.”
Luke got out his inspection camera, looking under the car and getting a little bit of a shock.
“Single exhaust, running 3.25 inch diameter, catalytic converter and twin reverse-flow mufflers with bypass valves. And it looks like it’s all heat-treated piping, so I’m not going to blow a hole in this by running the Astala hard.”
He closed the hood and got back into the car, then started the engine.
“Audible, but more from the front than the back. Intake resonance. Distinct flatplane notes, throttle response is, actually rather impressive. Turbochargers spool at about 3,000 RPM. Time to head to the track.”
Luke drove out of the parking garage, then pointed the Astala Vi down the nearest available road and stomped the accelerator to the floor.
“Chirps the tires in first gear, about what I expected. Handles nicely.”
At the track, Luke looked ready to continue the tests, gripping the leather-wrapped steering wheel with his black driving gloves.
“2.8 seconds from 0 to 60. 2:04.95 around the test track. They say it’ll do 209 MPH, and I don’t doubt that at all. No fade on the brakes, no bottoming out the suspension. 60 to 0 in 28.68 meters thanks to some carbon-ceramic race brakes front and rear. Two piston front, single piston rear calipers. Corners exceptionally well.”
Luke brought the Astala Vi back to the garage, then parked it back where he’d gotten it from, heading over to the desk to write his summary of the car.
“Interestingly enough, the Smooth Astala Vi is the first two-door, two-seat car in the lineup, and yet, it’s the first car that really surprised me. There is nothing slow about this car, except for one thing, and that is the rate at which it chugs through fuel. The Astala Vi managed, despite my best efforts to go really fast, to settle in at 38.9 MPG. Consider, for a moment, that your average shit-box hybrid gets about 40 MPG on average. This isn’t a hybrid, they don’t make hybrids with turbocharged flat-plane V8’s, built entirely out of carbon fiber, even to the damn wheels, and hybrids don’t go 200 miles an hour or reach 60 in less than three seconds. And yet the Astala Vi has given a smack-down to the hybrid car market. The hybrids have been terminated. So, what was most impressive about the Astala Vi, other than the gas mileage? It’s only $150,000. Okay, so it’s not the most drivable car so far, not the most comfortable so far, nor the most prestigious or the safest, but it is the sportiest and it is the most fuel efficient up to this point. And the other stats, other than safety, didn’t drop too much to give that. Given the retro-styling, I’m sure that plays a small part of that, and it’s not the end of the world to have a car with lower safety. I don’t intend on crashing the car, it’s just nice to know that you’ll survive, and the number of air bags and the safety belts guarantee that. Minor annoyances are just that with this car, minor. Okay, so there’s not a huge amount of space to put any luggage in this car. That said, there’s an entire foot-well not being used most of the time. Is the Astala Vi my car? I don’t know yet, but what I do know is, I’ll be back.”
Luke looked at the next car in line, the Bogliq Ambassador.
“Typical Bogliq Blue, interesting headlight arrangement, good size. It’s big, yet not as menacing as the other big cars have been. Though I have to ask Bogliq a question: Do they not use turn signals in Moldova? Also, surprising to see another car with carbon fiber wheels.”
He opened the door and settled into the driver’s seat, looking around the interior of the car. “Heads up display, five seats, hand-stitched leather, launch control, fairly standard for this lineup. Though it is hiding a mild surprise, being the first Automatic car I’ll be testing. This is going to be a bit interesting, most automatics aren’t sporty, but I have a bit of a good feeling about this one. Good number of speakers and air bags, as well as a nice extended center console to provide cupholders and storage for the rear seat passengers.”
He pulled the hood release, then got out and headed to the front of the car, looking into the engine compartment at the black-and-orange V12.
“Looks like Halloween happened in here. Black and Orange and red. Then again, not the worst color combination I could imagine. V12, all AlSi, DOHC 4-valve, so another member of the VVL crew, 6.6 liter displacement, twin snail, and a rather large water-to-air intercooler. Should have a bit of go to it, then. Redline at 7900, 893 horsepower at 7400, and 765 ft-lb of torque at 3800 RPM. Standard air filter housings to cut down the noise, direct injection, throttle per cylinder.”
Luke grabbed the inspection camera and took a look underneath. “Dual exhaust, 6.75” diameter, catalytic converter, and dual reverse flow mufflers. No bypass valves this time. Should make it quieter than the rest have been.”
He closed the hood and settled back into the car, starting it up. “As expected, very quiet. I’m sure I’ll hear some of it as I test the car out, but it won’t open up and roar like the others have.”
He pulled the gear selector down into Drive, then pulled out of the parking garage, heading to the test track. “Plenty of wheelspin if you lay into it, but rather controlled. Compared to the other cars, it’s more relaxing to drive, though the big turbochargers are somewhat ruining that. 4.1 seconds to 60 from a stand-still.”
At the track, Luke managed to run a 2:09.66, and in the process managed to shock him a little bit. “While it’s not the fastest thing I’ve had around here today, given that I had no control over the gears, that’s pretty damn good. 30.67 meters to stop from 60, though I think there’s just the slightest suggestion of brake fade. Not enough to affect the car too much, but I could see that causing some issues if I took it to a track and really thrashed on it for half a day. Also, another car with active suspension that isn’t trying to knock components out of alignment.”
He headed back to the garage to write his review, parking the Ambassador next to the Astala Vi.
“Well, the Bogliq Ambassador is a car of surprises. It brings a powerful engine together with the proven RWD layout, with a 7 speed automatic gearbox into a high-end luxury car. At 20.7 MPG, the Ambassador’s gas mileage is far from the worst so far, and boasting nearly 900 horsepower through an automatic, that’s quite an impressive feat. Also, the Ambassador turned a surprising number of heads as I drove around the city, and not just because of the blaring Bogliq Blue paint. The suspension is a double-wishbone front with MultiLink rear combination, resting on active suspension components for a comfortable ride. Another little surprise is the carbon fiber wheels, yet using glued aluminum for the unibody and aluminum for the panels. Yet, I don’t feel the Ambassador is too much worse off for that trade-off. At $152,400, it’s another mild bargain, something definitely to be considered, though at the same time, it makes me wonder if some of the small quirks could have been ironed out with a bit more money spent. However, everything about the Ambassador says that it’s designed to be reliable, a car that will be with me for decades, and for that reason alone, I’ll have to add it into the list of cars to revisit.”
Luke’s next car on the list was the DSD Saratoga, one which had been catching his attention since he’d started looking at the cars.
“Two doors, aggressive styling, some unusual design themes. Still, not a bad looking car. Can’t tell from the outside whether it’s front or mid engined, not that I’m worried about such things under most circumstances. Looks like DSD understands that visibility is important, so they’ve added extra glass to help with rear visibility. Then promptly blocked 30 percent of that added visibility with a big spoiler. Tail-lights are mounted surprisingly low, but then again, it seems to be part of the design theme, that things are a little unusual and out of place.”
Luke opened the door and settled into the seat, looking around the interior. “Seats are similar quality to the Ambassador, but there’s two of them instead of five. Heads-up display, fairly standard so far, though I understand why. Top of the line equipment. Seven-speed double-clutch sequential, with rather thick black-anodized aluminum shift paddles, launch control switch on the dash, electric differential controls, there’s a lot of potential here. Well, I’ll be able to tell whether it’s front or mid engined soon enough.”
Luke pulled the hood release and was promptly greeted by the engine being in what he considered the proper end of the car, up front where it belonged.
“V8, all AlSi construction, 5.5 liters, DOHC, 5 valves per cylinder. Beautiful bundle of snakes. Direct injection, Throttle per cylinder, performance intakes. 9,000 RPM redline, 700 horsepower at 8300 RPM, 489 ft-lb of torque at 6600 RPM. No doubt that this thing’s a race-car designed for the street.”
He grabbed his inspection camera and looked underneath the car.
“Out of the bundle of snakes, combined into a single exhaust pipe, 4.5 inch diameter, has a catalytic converter, but that’s it. This thing’s going to be loud.”
He settled into the driver’s seat, then started the engine. “I’m glad that I’m broadcasting thoughts in text mode, because you’d never hear me over this crossplane V8’s rumble. It’s echoing around the parking garage, and it’s set off every car alarm at idle! Granted, the throttle response is insane.”
Luke felt worried about taking the DSD Saratoga onto the streets, with the straight-pipe exhaust offering no muffling at all, but decided it’d be best just to get it to the track and back. This time, he decided against flooring it on city streets, the thunder of the exhaust making him ever more aware of just how many police cars there were on the streets right at that moment.
“Well, it’ll do 0-60 in 4 seconds, and it’ll lap the testing track in 2:00.30, so it’s fast. It’s also insanely loud and incredibly thirsty. 60 to 0 in 25.9 meters, so it’ll have no problem stopping for every cop wanting to give you a ticket for your exhaust being too loud.”
He brought it back to the parking garage, parked it, then headed over to his desk, both to write his summary of the car and to grab all the remotes to shut off the car alarms that all went off again. He found a post-it note on the desk as well.
“Hey, Luke, next time you fire up a race car, please turn the car alarms off before you leave.”
Luke wrote his summary after getting all the alarms silenced.
“The DSD Saratoga is, admittedly, fun to drive. It is first and foremost, a track car. Sure, you can drive it on the street, but you really don’t want to. It’s so insanely loud that it’ll set off car alarms, you get flipped the bird by pedestrians and motorcyclists with straight pipes on a regular basis, and the resonating thunder of the crossplane V8 just acts as a beacon to every police officer in a 30 mile radius. At $113,000, it’s not as expensive, initially, as some of the Saratoga’s competition, but, with fuel efficiency ratings of 12 MPG if you’re following a semi downhill with a tail-wind, and an exhaust louder than fighter jets on takeoff, I’d soon end up spending far more than the competition’s higher prices to drive the Saratoga on a daily basis. Sure, it’s damned fast, and I’d expect that from the crazy Australians, but I wouldn’t be able to live with it. Sorry, DSD, but as comfortable as the interior is, and as good as the sound deadening materials were, that’s just a little too loud. It’s a great track car, and I got a lot of thumbs up at the track, and people telling me it sounded awesome, but only at the track. Driving around on city streets, people covered their ears, they glared at the car, they flipped the bird, and yelled obscenities I wasn’t able to hear.”
) I’d forgotten the subjective nature of the CSR!!! 
I made some very specific tradeoffs to achieve what I did with the Custom, so I was expecting to get dinged on that, especially considering all the sedans available.