Oh god every time someone says “don’t look it up” of course I go and look and I remember now. Why? Why???
On the other hand I was able to revisit squidhead’s glorious one-liner:
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All of them
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Ooh boy. My lowest point was definitely around new year’s 2019, while being a host for CSR 92. In fact it’s probably one of the lowest points of my life in general, though the problem was much larger than the hosting malarkey. It was a combination of that, with how my life was going down, that made it feel so miserable. Get ready for story time.
First off, it was surprisingly hard for me to find time to work on hosting. I was on vacation so I thought I had the time, but I failed to consider just how much my folks pull me around. I’m an only child, so my folks really like having me around to help out. I don’t mind that, but it means I can’t simply vanish for hours on end in my laptop, unless it’s really important or relevant for my life. That created extra friction, because as you might know CSR is a time consuming affair, and my folks immediately noticed and complained I was on the laptop “playing games” more than usual. From then on, I basically couldn’t get on the laptop for much of the day, out of concern they might act up. That’s why I was slow to respond to feedbacks, and I recall I even had to send the submissions open announcement while I was driving, which is… rather clutch.
It’s a little inconvenient, and my resolve dropped a bit, but at least I had a little breathing space after the submissions period opened. But not much. Oh no no, we’re going lower.
A couple days later on new year’s. I had a date planned with my girlfriend of over 2 years. It’s been an uphill battle since she started on an overseas college program since the preceding semester, so I wanted to make the holidays count. But she had been acting strange the past couple days, concurrent with me hosting. Then just before new year’s day, the date plans went up in flames as she opted to go out with her friends instead. I then celebrated another boring — yet this time a more depressing — new year’s. I was really looking forward to not only my first new year’s celebration with her, but also my first new year’s outside fam altogether. The day after, I found out why she bailed. We met up and she dropped the bomb that she wanted to break up. On fng January 1st. Even now I’m still feeling some aftershocks from the break, so that’s that 
By that point my resolve for CSR was just gone. Heck, the next couple days, I couldn’t find the will to even show up in the community, let alone tend to hosting. I finally came back a mere 24 hours before the deadline, having not touched a single entry from the rising pile.
By pure luck, said pile apparently came out to be much smaller than any other CSR I’ve been in. I wasn’t aware that Christmas and New Year’s is just about peak low times for activity, so I was pleasantly surprised to only see 27 entries in the end (vs. the 40s of previous rounds). It still took a whole couple days and nights to catch up to the mess, but at least by then my family understood my predicament and gave me the time to work. After the week from hell, I can’t believe I managed to stick the landing for a solid enough round. The journey to it though, as you can tell, sure as hell wasn’t.
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Man you call that a low? That’s fucking amazing that you pulled it off even after facing so much bullshit. Hats off to you, that’s all I can say. I’m glad that you’re doing better now.
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Oh…oh my…
Thanks pal, appreciate it. I can go further and just say the whole of 2019 was crap in general, but I suppose in times like these, there’s not much you can do but suck it up and keep chugging along.
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Hm, I reckon my lowest point was probably a mix of both the forums and the discord. I can’t remember which CSR exactly (CSR 97), but anyway I got extremely salty at I think it was Chips, who I’m fairly sure has lost his patience, but not his no BS which I can completely understand. There’s only so much you can have when people are being anoyying and are in the wrong, like I was, I didn’t follow the correct naming scheme and for some reason even after changing my steam name my forum name is still the same. My car was put on the “wall of shame” and back then that hurt alot, looking back I can see how it’s kinda a joke but it’s still very off putting and upsetting for many people.
This was just the start of me and Chips banging heads though, as in the Auctions I tried to enter three cars, one of which used .db editing which as I understand is not allowed in any competition at all, but of course I thought because it wasn’t about stats, just selling a car it was fine, it was all made up anyway. No, Chips needed an accurate price to start with. I had got a little bit of maturity since the last incident, but clearly not enough, as I argued that he had no reason to decline the other cars as they weren’t edited in anyway. Chips refused, as he had a right to do as the host. I should of just accepted it as it was and waited for the next one, I thought I was great, the fact was that probably nobody would of bought my stuff anyway and I would of been left feeling anoyyed.
So thats the story of why I don’t really get along with Chips, but if you read this I’d like to get along better with people in general this year, so maybe we can fix that.
Thats not the end of my mistakes though, oh no. CSR 96, the round before probably why I was frustrated anyway I did a dumb, and entered an electric car that was binned. Why? well, because it was over the emmissions limit. Yep.
But we’re not done yet
Now we get to the discord, I was far more self centered than I am now, I reposted my cars all the time, blocked up chats with shitty jokes to the extent that VRI took it upon themselves to write me and a few other users a rather lovely and compelling document that was released to the entire discord. It was an eye opener, even if I didn’t think of it at the time. I didn’t interact for a few weeks, It was school time and I was fairly busy, I didn’t have time to play, by the time I got back I realised how stupid I was being. Now I mostly save my cars until they are finished, and I don’t repost unless I have to, to give inspiration or if somebody asks about a certain car.
I’d like to say I’m a better person. I’ve learnt from my many mistakes, I’m more aware that I can’t engineer for shit, but can design at near the top (at times, we still all have that :myfirstdesign: moment once in a while)
What I’m trying to say is, before you start to reply to something, full of embaressment and frustration, stop. Look at it the day after, revise your design. Look at real world examples and period correctness. Learn from your mistakes, because if you don’t you’ll never change.
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You did well to fulfill your commitment. It’s to a bunch of pixels which an online community play with, but it’s still a commitment nonetheless. Thanks for sharing.
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My low point? Well there was a few and I don’t think I’ve risen well past them but I can probably pinpoint rock bottom, lol.
I remember I did a photoshop of a burnout on an 80’s sports sedan that I made, and was rather proud of it. I posted it in the car showcase on Discord, and it gathered a significant amount of attention. I was incredibly surprised, and wanted to thank the community, so I went to the forum thread that dealt with Discord quotes and posted a screenshot along with what I intended to be a grateful “thank you” to the community for showing interest, because that amount of attention was still new. (It was a point in my life where I think I realized that I might have depression. It isn’t diagnosed but according to my girlfriend who does have it… so this was nice, people seemed to appreciate me. So like, thanks y’all!)
Then Narfy called me out on what it actually turned out to be, a post about myself getting likes in a thread for the “Best Quotes…” Well done, Adam. Lol. I tried defending it but eh, kinda worthless. Move past it, live, and learn!
So that was fun!
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Hot damn, and I thought I related the most to yurimacs’ post but your post had me the most related. The good thing for you is that you weren’t banned from the discord and I was. I hope I could get back into the discord this year though it seems unlikely. Hope you and Chips can get along!
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