CSR 98 - She took the kids

2003 Milae Climax SAE4 Eko


“Why go good when can go best”

Additional Image

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Yes, the ad is hand-drawn. We did not have the extra budget for a professional cameraman and model.

Prices starting from just over $12.500 for the base model.

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We understand you

You had a rough time lately and you spent the last 3 years working tirelessly to make the picture of a storybook-family a reality. Before you could even get a grasp of what is happening your entire life has become a wreck.

But you choosed to leave the past behind.

Wake up. Storybooks are a thing of the past

The HPM Sharoneer.

2003 Advertisement of the HPM Sharoneer

Pictures



Details
  • 5 Doors, 7 Seats
  • 5 Gear Manual
  • CD Player + Radio
  • 164hp
  • 30MPG

What do you need more ?
All of this for a stunning price of

9874$

Afterword

This is my first time competing :slight_smile: I hope i did a proper job.
Sorry for the bad pics, Its 3 AM now and i just finished doing that stupid Advertisement, so good night
Special Thanks to Keikyun for helping me out :heart:

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2003 Fuji Certainty ST





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The Armor Oxford. Life, within reach.


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2003 Seishido Dia 2.2TD AX



The 2003MY Seishido Dia comes with everything your family needs, in a clever, efficient package.
Featuring seven comfortable seats, able to fold flat for improved interior flexibility and boot space and easily accessible through sliding doors, equipped with a 4-speaker CD and Cassette audio system, a sunroof, 15" alloy wheels and modern safety measures allowing it to reach a rating of 4 Stars in Euro-NCAP crash tests. Driving either in the city or the motorway is made easier by the AHPS power steering syetem.

Fit with a 2.2 liter 4L-TE turbodiesel engine, making 122bhp, the Dia 2.2TD manages a top speed of 125mph, 0-62 in 11.2 seconds, and allows for great fuel efficiency at a rated 42 MPG.

All of this is available at an MSRP of £11,520 at your local Seishido dealer.
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None of this is any sort of lore, but as Peniston was loosely based on Rover, figured I’d try a new brand that fit better here from a country that produced cars partly responsible for filling that old Rover market - Korea

Introducing the new 2003 Onohdi Adverso, our new compact MPV.

The name Adverso is derived from both adventurous and versatile. Built on a proven, time-tested drivetrain, the 1.8 multivalve engine offers an extremely flexible driving experience, with enough power to tackle any terrain with a fuel economy return friendly for anyone’s wallet.

Seen here in GS trim with optional protection package and metallic “Misty Jade” paintwork, the Adverso offers outstanding value for money without sacrificing any of the advanced design choices you have come to expect from Onohdi, including our renowned Multi-Link suspension setup for extra comfort and drivability, and a 4 speaker CD player/radio system.

Whether you’re on an adventure to some foggy highlands, loading up the weekly shop, or taking your friends out for a meal - go Onohdi.

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Thank you to everybody for participating!

The round is now closed and over 40 cars have been submitted in the end! Pretty impressive stuff!

Give me a moment to finalise the last few initial verdicts and I will have them up pretty soon!

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I was about to enter too, I just couldn’t get home in time. Bummer.

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Your would-be entry looked amazing too, shucks.

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I’ll do something with it in the Hokuto thread. Was gonna be lore friendly.

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CSR 98 - The Browsing, Day 1

Monday, 10th March 2003
”Chez Sharon”, Croydon, UK

“Dear Diary,

What an absolute manic morning! There was a power cut overnight meaning the alarm clock didn’t go off and made us horrendously late. I really need to get myself something better than that darn clock he left behind. Hate it. Hate him. Besides, kids were being a pain as usual and did everything possible to hold things up. I only had time for a PTA (pits, tits and ass). Breakfast was everywhere. I’d rather forget this morning. Oh and to put the cherry on top of the cake the Rover wouldn’t fucking start again and the traffic was horrendous making me mega late dropping the kids off and the teachers were pissed off with me again. That being said, now I’ve got my new interweb system in the house and this electronic mail thing I’m going to see what the car companies have sent me so I can get rid of this pile of crap. I just hope nobody sent me that ruddy Fiat Multiply that Jackie has. I’ll update this when I’ve seen them. Now to make a large mug of strong coffee and to do some car shopping. Cya for now!

XX Sharon”


Sharon closed the diary, grabbed herself a much required coffee and sat down in front of her new computer desk and logged into her emails to see what had been sent to her. Convinced and hopeful that she will find the one, she starts flicking through her Yahoo inbox on her painfully slow internet.


Please note, the prices mentioned are with a 20% markup, with 17.5% VAT added and converted to GBP at 1.55 USD to 1 GBP as was the rate in March 2003. The prices will appear different to what appears in game.


@goblin95 - Garuda Avia 2.0

“We’re off to a good start with that price as it is quite a bit under my budget at £9,507 meaning I’ve got loads of spending money for the shopping trips! I also really like the way it looks, it kinda looks happy and reminds me of squirrels. I also really like that blue paint I would certainly go for that if I went for this. Would be really nice if it had those cool sliding doors on it, but the roof rack is a bonus if we run out of boot space on holidays. Fuel economy seems decent and those servicing costs are really nice and low. I can’t really see too much bad about this so I’m going to have to add it in and see how it drives!”

The Garuda Avia was added to the list for a test drive


@jameseydude - Road Defender Kyoob

“What in all things… what is that? What an absolute train wreck. And where are the door handles? Oh it has some push to open doors. Sounds like something that will break to me. And that claimed fuel consumption is simply awful. This one is a no. Fuck me. Actually don’t do that I don’t need men right now I can pleasure myself. Did I just say that out loud? This car has got me some type of way and it isn’t good. Begone!”

The Road Defender Kyoob was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@Elizipeazie - Anhultz Ganymede IV

“That is quite a cute sounding name and a cute looking car. I love the fact it isn’t symmetrical and the two-tone is gorgeous. The price is fine, £10,520 is within budget and leaves me some money for the shopping trips as well. I’m a little worried about those servicing costs but the fuel consumption being claimed here makes up for that. Oh and finally some sliding doors, fantastic for the getting the kids in and out. Reliability reports seem to be good, no owners have complained. Oh wait there is one, but that’s fine, I can live with seeing just one. But what is this boot system thing? I just can’t get my head around it. I’m pretty sure the dealer can explain when I am there. That’s a point, I’d better note this one down.”

The Anhultz Ganymede IV was added to the list for a test drive


@NoahC - Yinzer WunderVibe

“Yinzer WunderVibe. What sort of drugs were taken when that was named? And the colour is disgusting. In fact I’m not very keen on the design at all it is a bit of a mess. And that boot with it opening sideways and having a wheel on the back is going to be a nightmare in the Bluewater multi-storey car park. This is not it.”

The Yinzer WunderVibe was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@yangx2 - Huangdou Galaxy Trek

“Galaxy Trek what do they think I’m going to do, head out into… Oh wait a second this thing looks fucking epic. Built in campervan bus thing the kids would love this and I love this and everyone would love this we could do so much with this oh my days. Breathe Sharon you’re getting excited. Let me see, just under £10.5k that’s a good sign, sliding doors, no reliability issues reported here on the interwebs. That boot is going to be a problem in the multi-storey car parks though, but I’m sure the camping aspect will make up for that. In fact, it does. Oh, that fuel economy isn’t beautiful though, but the servicing costs are OK so maybe I can live with it. You know what this thing looks crazy cool I must see it.”

The Huangdou Galaxy Trek was added to the list for a test drive


@Kobacrashi - Reduit Automotive GSR7 SSR Special Edition

“Er… excuse me? The what now? That name is… something else. This thing looks awfully aggressive. Hmm… I kind of like that though. Let us see the price and costs. Oh. Max price and stupid servicing costs. Well that was a bad idea. No sliding doors either and some people have been reporting that they are having some issues with the car. I think I’d rather not.”

The Reduit Automotive GSR7 SSR Special Edition let me catch my breath was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@N_A997 - CBK Engineering MP7 V6 Aerodynamique

“Oh for crying out loud can people not give cars simple names. How am I supposed to tell the guy at insurance what I am driving? I’ll never remember it. Whatever. Anyway I’m not sold by the looks but whatever. Is that a V6 engine? Like a sports car engine? In a… but the power rating is. I’m very confused. Also the fuel economy and servicing costs are on the higher side as well. Although it is quite cheap. Hm… Yeah maybe not.”

The CBK Engineering MP7 V6 Aerodynamique was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@DoctorNarfy - MEN Suburbvan SLD

“Oh my God what! Men! I don’t believe it, I don’t want a man is this some sort of sick joke. I’m gonna cry uuuuuuuuuuuuh. Oh Sharon you stupid cow get yourself together. Just buy a W and an O letter and that will make things much better as you’ll be riding in a women. Ok that sounds terrible this is a bad idea I’m gonna cry again uuuuuuuuuh. WAIT A SECOND that price is. £8,087! Quite frankly I couldn’t give a fuck if this was called cumstain or lesbianism at that price anything goes. Let me see. Not a single reliability report, in fact a very long warranty is included. Really cheap to run as well. And the looks are, well OK I suppose. It’s called a MEN that is the biggest problem. Guess I’m going to have to call them. Keep it together Sharon, keep it together.”

The MEN Suburbvan SLD was added to the list for a test drive


@NormanVauxhall - Znopresk Zona 1.8 Escursione

“Look at this orange looking thing. Looks ready to go out into the fields and on family trips. Ah, wonderful. The price is great as well, I’d happily take just over nine grand. And… oh. That doesn’t look great. There’s a few people here with problems with the car. Oh no but I like this. But if there is anything the Rover has made me worry about it is this. But it seems so good. But then again the true camping van did this much better, if pricier. Yeah, this is not the one either.”

The Znopresk Zona 1.8 Escursione was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@Keikyun - Automan Uniwagon Schport 2.0 Turbo

“You know what there is a certain sense of pleasure I get from looking at price tags that are low for things like this and this has one. I also think it is quite a charming looking vehicle as well and it looks as if it comes pre-fitted with stickers to warn people about my precious, annoying little brats of children that I love dearly. How sweet. The running costs claimed look good and almost no complaints about the car in terms of reliability. This looks promising.”

The Automan Uniwagon Schport 2.0 Turbo was added to the list for a test drive


@Flamers - EstatleyHome

“Holy shit that thing is long. And it’s called EstatleyHome but it doesn’t say who by. And what a mess of a design. This is truly diabolical, I couldn’t care less if it was dirt cheap and cost nothing to run, this is way to large and looks like an abomination.”

The EstatleyHome was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@abg7 - GEC GCV 1.6Ti

“… Nice blue I suppose.”

The GEC GCV 1.6Ti was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@conan - Ronnie Pickering Funk 1.8

“Wait a second, Ronnie Pickering? I think I went to class with him back in the good old days in Orpington. I’m sure that name rings a bell. He was a top end bellend at that. But he would never own something like this surely? Besides the stupid name, let us see. The price is on the high side at £11,319 but I can live with that, will just have to do fewer shopping sprees. Oh but the servicing costs are quite high as well. Fuel consumption is OK I suppose. And I’m not that keen on the looks. And it doesn’t have any sliding doors. This just seems a bit too… lifeless. A bit like Ronnie Pickering if I’m honest. Wait… Oh. Did he? Never…”

The Ronnie Pickering Funk 1.8 was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@Mad_Cat - Hyoung Jindo

“Sometimes I really do wonder where some of these names come from. Why can’t it be something simple and English? How hard can it be, honestly? Right, let’s see. That is a very nice price indeed. £8,601. Ugh, sign me the fuck up that is a load of spending at Bluewater! That being said, the car is a very… bland. Maybe a more vibrant colour could spruce it up a bit. Yeah, I’ll go for something daring like… ooh, red! No. Orange! Yes, orange like that adventure car that wasn’t that good of a car. Reliability reports have come back all good, servicing is good although the fuel economy could be quite a bit better. You know what I think I might have to give this a drive just to see.”

The Hyoung Jindo was added to the list for a test drive


@CorsicaUnkown & @Repti - Corsica Bolide

“Now this is what I am talking about. Yaaaas. Oh my god I love the look of this it looks proper modern and retro and good and fresh and chunky and funky. And it isn’t too big either oh my god oh my god I’m going to start crying uuuuuuuuuuh. Sharon you stupid bitch what are you like. Anyway, £10,876 is fine for something this simply stunning and I couldn’t give an arse about the no sliding doors this is a proper Jeep looking thing and it looks goooooooood. And the running costs are reasonably affordable as well! And no reliability reports, I am going to cry again. Hold it back bitch, hold it back. I have a good feeling about this one.”

The Corsica Bolide was added to the list of a test drive


@ZSCHMEEZ - Albatross Mojave

“Oh. Another Jeep thing. But wait, this thing looks pretty damn massive. Oh. This is going to be a problem to get around town, onto the driveway, parking at school and most importantly maneuvering it around Bluewater. It also doesn’t wow me as much as the other one. Besides, this is too big.”

The Albatross Mojave was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@Caine - Arkadus Eloquence

https://i.caine.pro/SiVA.png

“Ah I see. This is like that other two-tone one from before but not as pretty. Or as cheap. Or as cheap to run on fuel nor in servicing costs. That isn’t good. Still, maybe the reliability reports will come back ok. Or maybe they won’t. Couldn’t have been worse if they tried really.”

The Arkadus Eloquence was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@Mike85 - AMZ Komradesse Standard

“Woah the marketing department really needs to get their shit together this advert is blinding and really quite bad. This is giving me a headache why this blurry neon mess. Seriously what is going on. I can barely see the car properly and I’m having to focus so hard on it I’m getting a pounding headache. I mean I can tell it looks kind of OK but I’m worried about the rear doors having no rails to roll on meaning… are they backwards opening door things? Oh this is just not working for me, maybe they are not I just can’t tell. Doesn’t matter anyway, the reliability reports have come back bad. I just want to delete this so badly now my head is throbbing.”

The AMZ Komradesse Standard was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@Jaimz - FM TrailWay 1.6e

“Now that neon mess has been removed from this electronic mail thing, let me see what I have here. That is already close to maximum price at £11,265 so let’s hope we… That isn’t good. That reliability record is quite scary to read actually. Oh shit one of them caught fire! What if that happened to my kids? Also is that one of those really annoying sideways opening boots with a wheel on it that just gets in the way and makes it impossible to park in multi-storey car parks properly. Ugh, sometimes…”

The FM TrailWay 1.6e was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@Ryan93 - CUM Crosslander 2.5

“Things can’t get worse surely… And I was wrong. Cum. Cum! CUM! Who in their fucking right mind would decide to call their car that. DISGUSTANG. I can’t believe I am reading this, a car named after the disgusting thing that man used to get all over the place. Cum! I’m horrified, so much I think I’m going to cry. Uuuuuuuuuuuuh. How could they possibly? Oh and the reliability report isn’t great either, probably because they are all cock-sucking mother-”

The SEMEN Crosslander 2.5 was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@Kyuu77 - KGB Marauder

“Ew. What is this ultra-futuristic prototype thing doing in here? That looks really bad. Who would want to be seen in that. And those wheels. Is this production ready? Surely it isn’t. Oh wow it has a price and servicing costs and both are high, the servicing costs are astronomical. And people own this? And they have problems with it. Wow, this is a fucking mess. Wait, one has said it only has a cassette player, what year is this 1992? Oh fuck that’s funny. I can see the slogan now being Future Design, Technology of Yesteryear. Hilarious!”

The KGB Marauder was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@EddyBT - BT Motors Alces FE 2.3

“Are we finally looking at something reasonable? Could this actually be? I mean it isn’t the most stylish thing I’ve ever seen but I can’t really be upset about it, unlike some things so far. Let me see what we have… oh, a blank reliability report so we must be looking at something pretty impressive here! The price is on the low side, that’s nice as well. And the running cost appear to be acceptable. Also handy that it has sliding doors, although a roof rack or something would’ve been nice to have had. I can’t really complain though at this price, I think this must be looked at.”

The BT Motors Alces FE 2.3 was added to the list for a test drive


@Mikonp7 - Neko MPMX-1

“Let me see what this one has to offer. Well this is a charming looking… Chinese thing? In fact that looks very Chinese? Is this made in China? That means it will be… no. It certainly isn’t cheap at £11,044. Well maybe it makes up for that by being a really good car. Let me check the reliability record. Hm… I’ve seen worse but I wouldn’t exactly call it brilliant from what people have said. I’ve certainly seen better. That worries me a bit. Servicing plans are reasonably priced and the fuel consumption is… OK, I suppose. This is a lot of just doing alright. And at that price. Do I? It might be… but then again. Fuck it if I’m this uncertain then it ain’t worth having.”

The Neko MPMX-1 was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@Centurion_23 - Pemhall Cantaro GLi

“Well this one looks awfully plain. Come on, I want something exciting. But what’s this? Is that price for real, because if so that is wonderful. £8,377! That is a lot of shopping at Bluewater that is for sure. And it’s got some sliding doors for the money as well. Let us get that reliability report up for this, but while that is doing that I’ve just seen the extremely affordable running costs as well. Come on, something cheap and cheerful, let that reliability report come back OK… Yes! This thing may be as boring as it can get, the low price makes this something worth looking at.”

The Pemhall Cantaro GLi was added to the list for a test drive


@PengiWanKenobi - Armand Voyage Aspire

“Oh this thing looks kind of cute and cuddly yet at the same time it looks nice with that red paint. I can’t really lie about that. Although not so sure about the rear, looks a bit nanny not mummy. Anyway, the price is fine, I’ve still got some change for shopping. It’s a shame it doesn’t have any sliding doors but the more I look at the figures the less I care. I mean the running costs are good enough, although fuel economy could be better, and there doesn’t seem to be many people reporting any problems with it. I can’t really find anything I don’t like so I guess I’ll have to look more into this car.”

The Armand Voyage Aspire was added to the list for a test drive


@Rk38 - Maesima Levitas Touring 2.0 5MT

“I mean I can’t really dislike this car for the looks because it is a very smart looking car, but it isn’t my kind of car. This is really boxy but not cute like the Jeep things. This kind of looks masculine and business like. You see I just don’t like that because it appeals to the male fantasy. What am I saying? Sharon you really need to get yourself checked out. In fact it really looks quite big, what are the measurements? Oh, pretty big. Probably why the fuel economy is claimed to be that high as well. Yeah I don’t like this.”

The Maesima Levitas Touring 2.0 5MT was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@HPMinecraft - HPM Sharoneer

“Ha fuck me it is called Sharon! It’s me! But what is that? This thing looks like it had a moment with the spare parts bin of the traffic light factory. What is going on? This better have some really good points or I’m going to… Oh, that reliability report isn’t very good and the servicing costs are a bit on the high side. Yeah, the more I think about it the more I realise I like the other Jeep thing so never mind.”

The HPM Sharoneer was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails

Oh but bonus points for the video that was actually really good. Here, have a cookie!


@MasterDoggo - Jipot J8 16s

“Oh look at this charming, cute looking orange thing. This is right up my street. I love absolutely everything about this design it looks wonderful where do I buy it oh my god. I mean it could be a bit cheaper I suppose but I can live with £10,852 as I will still have some left. And I suppose it could do with some sliding doors. Plus that fuel economy is rather on the high side. Oh no, please don’t be a disappointment, this thing looks really damn good. Why is this reliability report taking so long to load on my new interweb thing? Oh. That’s… Well never mind, the car was cute.”

The Jipot J8 16s was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@titleguy1 - Kimura Sirani SXi

“Well look at this blue bad boy. This is really different in like that it isn’t a cute car or a boring car but like a sort of modern, retro funky car that looks really nice. I like this so far. And it is under £10k so I will have loads of money left over as well. Those servicing costs look pleasing as well, and it has those sliding doors and ooh a roof rack. Yep, this one looks good. I can live with the higher fuel economy, that is fine. Hang on. This thing is pretty big, and the reliability reports are… just about OK. Could I live with the size bearing in mind everything else it appears to offer? Maybe if I drove it I will find out.”

The Kimura Sirani SXi was added to the list to test drive


@ElMenduko - Crusader Antioch SX

“Oh yay another Jeep thingy. I mean this isn’t quite as cool as that other one I saw but I still really like it. Although that beige baby puke like colour really needs to go. In fact that really reminds me of Tegan’s when she was a baby. Yeah, maybe a bright blue or something will brighten the mood. Let’s see. Reasonably reliable according to these reports, that is good. The fuel economy is acceptable, that’s good to see. The servicing prices are not too high, that’s another plus. Actually this really does look nice. Let us find the price, where the hell is that price. Oh. That’s… basically all the money. But I can’t fault it. Maybe it would be worth it? I think we’ll have to!”

The Crusader Antioch SX was added to the list to test drive


@Xepy - Milae Climax SAE4 Eko

“This looks really familiar. Oh yeah, this thing has been around for yonks now. Actually this has been around for many years now, you mean they actually still sell these. I think the Rover was new when this came out. I don’t want an old car. Why are they sending me old, relatively refreshed cars from… uh… let me find it. 1996! I only had one child then! I could never. And the price is high as well. And the servicing costs could be better. No, this can be completely forgotten.”

The Milae Climax SAE4 Eko was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@CC9020 - Fuji Certainty ST 1.4

“Oooh this is a smoky black one. Why does that sound so awful? Sharon you have a filthy mind and a filthy body. Shave you hag. Let me see. Very cheap. Actually it is very, very cheap at £8,064. Maybe I should buy two? No. The running costs are absolutely fine as well. So that should also mean the reliability record… well turns out it isn’t and I don’t want a repeat of the Rover no matter how cheap this thing is. Ugh can’t they just make decent cars nowadays. Certainty it may be called but this certainty is not. Does that make sense? Probably not.”

The Fuji Certainty ST 1.4 was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@LinkLuke - GMI Maxim FX

“You know I should really look at the reliability records first before anything since it is so important. I mean this thing already looks like a disaster as it is but I’m not even going to read another thing before I’ve seen this report load up. Never mind those running costs are absolutely terrible. Oh wow would you look at that, not only does it look like an accident, the car was signed off by accident as well with those remarks about reliability. Get the fuck out you stupid piece of mother-”

The GMI Maxim FX was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@EnryGT5 - Seishido Dia 2.2TD AX

“Now I’ve got that pile of shit out of the way let’s move on to the next one shall we. Shiseido? The skincare stuff… wait what? Oh no, shitnado. Pfffff, Sharon you dumb hag. Say-she-do. She do. Ha I’m so funny. Where is that reliability report. Ugh how do I make this thing go faster. This bug-eyed thing looks kind of cute though and it has the slidey slidey doors. Lovely. Price is nice. Oh, what in all things holy are those servicing costs my God. And the reliability is awful. Maybe I wasn’t wrong about this Shitnado Die 2.2TuberculosisDick Axe because I said that and I won’t apologise for it sweatie.”

The Seishido Dia 2.2TD AX was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


@adamd - Onohdi Adverso GS

“Oh at last the final car I can just about feel myself wanting to give up on life. And this thing looks like it already has done that. Sharon why are you being like this you are a kind person. Stop it. Oh, that reliability is OK. But I can’t pronounce the name and I still don’t like the look of it. What else does it offer… Cheap price, nothing better than just about acceptable running costs. Yeah forget about this one.”

The Onohdi Adverso GS was deleted from Sharon’s e-mails


And with that, Sharon shut down the computer add took her notes of the cars she liked to make the arrangements for the following day. She made herself another strong coffee, and sat down in front of her TV to watch some terrible daytime chat-show televsion.


Congratulations to:
@goblin95
@Elizipeazie
@yangx2
@DoctorNarfy
@Keikyun
@Mad_Cat
@CorsicaUnknown & @Repti
@EddyBT
@Centurion_23
@PengiWanKenobi
@titleguy1
@ElMenduko

You have progressed to the next round where Sharon will tear your cars apart in the car dealership, moan even more about everything and then drive your cars terribly around the streets of London and along the M25. I hope you are happy with this. Who knows, you might even sell the car afterwards so it’s probably worth it.


HALL OF SHAME

Yes, I’m doing it as well. Thanks @MrChips for doing this last round I can’t wait to rip the next few cars to absolute shreds for not complying with the rules


@Oldenways - BoCa Number 2

What could possibly be wrong with this Renault Avantime rip-off (kind of)? Well, Sharon was most disappointed when she found out that when there were only 4 full size seats. What was going to happen when herself and four of her girlfriends go out together? NO.


@electroGG - Griffin CHS

Griffin were so pleased with their car they decided to send something above the maximum budget. They thought Sharon was being a tight bitch and needed to spend a bit more cash on their simply flawless product. But they forgot who Sharon was and she spoke not just to the manager, but the CEO about this.


@LS-Vehicles - Tri Efira

So what could possibly go wrong with a car with 8 full seats and a tiny little engine producing next to no power? Yes, this thing had a 0.0 sportiness rating for being such a boring, boring drive with absolutely no power. Sharon would’ve been dead behind the wheel, and there isn’t much life left in her anyways, are you trying to murder the poor cow?


@ramthecowy - Pyongyang Radius

This is mainly here because the advert was posted rather inexcusably late. So that’s one thing. I thought maybe I would be kind and generous and give it a proper review, but considering it is absolutely massive and has a seating arrangement of 1-3-3 I decided that it just wasn’t worth it. And Sharon was offended by the advert, she loves her middle name but don’t you dare call her Karen. She is still on hold waiting to speak to the CEO.


@MGR_99 - Yakaza Teema Turbo 2.5 EFI

Sharon loved the pretty looking advert and lovely looking car. But that’s all she got. No information or links. Please send me your car by PM not just post it in the thread


@GassTiresandOil - Armor Oxford

I was going to be really cruel and put this car here because the person who sent it to me misspelt their own username, but a typo is a typo. And then I saw the crash test results. And then Sharon did. And then she cried. That safety rating really isn’t what we were hoping for.


Thanks for your participation everybody, the next round should be up tomorrow at around this time, hopefully with the final results, too!

24 Likes

Only the finest bodily fluids colors for you!

In fact it used to be red but I remembered to change it to a pale yellowish at the last moment and said eh fuck it.

5 Likes

Oh thank you very much

Oh fuck, well at least I know what I have to do for the next one.

Right. I think the message here is “it’s too big.” Looking forward to round 2!

Goddamn Sharon is insane :grimacing:

I think you mean she’s a strong independent woman who don’t need no men

Convoluted names are how minivans are made to sound exciting. Just read the VIN, it’ll pop right up.