2022 Shitbox Rally - Out of This World! (Results Out!)

Is it ok to be 500 dollars overbudget?

@interior No, unacceptable.
I very much enjoy various teams coming up as competition to my team of Chicota, Pi, Loojoe, CV Co and Climentol to definitelly not accept any ban that might prevent said teams to participate

Like, thats tiny difference, im pretty sure you could cut it down.

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Agreed. IIRC my truck was barely over 20k, so you can definitely hit that budget haha. :stuck_out_tongue:

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Team Slow

Prologue. Part 0- We need a car.
Right, you may already know who we are at this point.
Driver: Matt.S
Navigator: John.T

The car we will be taking today is the 1996 Schnell XL53 V8. The very car that the rich kid would bully you about because his (or her) parents owned an higher trim V12 version which costed 6x more with some differences. Oh and that model had a car phone as standard. On which with the V8… You pay $1400 for the car phone. Cheapest and better option was an house phone anyway. Other than the disadvantage of being unable to call from inside your car with a fancy phone, oh well it’d be obsolete years later. (30,000 for the V8, 45,400 for the V12.)

After some time scoring the online marketplaces for a car that was dependable, they stumble upon the XL53 V8
John: “So now we’ve hit jackpot?” John replies to Matt looking at the car’s listing on the computer
Matt: “Very much so, stop laughing and giggling, i can hear you, No it’s not the V12 model that barely anybody bought. It’s the better model. V8.”
John: I remember everyone at a highschool parking lot either owning one with daddy’s money, or the far more premium version.

Backstory: Ex-taxi car

Before it was sold to us, it used to be an fleet car back in the day in the Las Vegas area. You know, the same place where everyone put their gambling addiction to their misery in casinos. Then eventually look at the rabbithole they dug. But yeah thats far from the story. The company used to do research on vehicles and electronics, but then the company declared bankruptcy in 2014 and the owner just recently liquidated the entire fleet on auction. Surely the car looks like a mess after research. But most experiments on the car did not involve harming the structural integrity of the cars.



The Schnell XL53 lore
The XL-series was introduced in 1996 mostly as a business venture if luxury cars could work for the brand. The Pillarless hardtops were available on higher trim models, same with a canvas top. These were mostly prime sellers for the brand in the US, into which it was originally about to be rejected from sale in America due to disappointing sales of the LS32 sports car. But US operations said otherwise and approved of the project being sold in the US.







There’s not many differences alongside the V12 trims and V8s. Magnesium Monoblocks were an option. V12 car has Hydropneumatic suspension as standard.

Meanwhile
They take in the car to the garage where it gets some supplementary parts to aid in the adventure from Nevada to Crugandr. Oh and they go back, so reliabillity is a must to them, so it was a wiser decision to not buy the V12. Emissions of both cars is about as equivalent as a pack of a certain amount of cigarettes, but who cares. 12 hours of copious work.

Modifications:
4WD system from an old beaten up 4X4.
CB Radio from a Taxi
Kerosene
Step bars
Steel Wheels (plus tires)
ABS Delete, Back in the day nobody had ABS before it went mainstream.

The car it became.
We’ve modified it quite a bit, we also have a bit of essentials to help our car.






god damn my FPS was near nonexistent

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That DIY roof rack is awesome!

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Agreed. A real piece of “We made it solid and sturdy so nothing breaks” engineering.

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Part 0.1 - another piece of the prologue puzzle
JANNE: So, what did your invite in the mailbox say?
ANDREAS: Well, it’s from the strange cat people we met in the Kronograd or bust rally in 2016…they are hosting another shitbox run…and…
MARIE: Fuck, not anoth…
J: YES WE’RE GOING!

Immediately the van was rolled into the garage to get some modifications to better cope with the offroading conditions that was going to be present in the shitbox rally.

A: So, how do you lift a vehicle like this?
J: Easy. Just some raiding of the IP parts box. Front suspension is more or less a copy of 4WD Terrex, Rugger or Rexetta, so coil springs from one of them will work very well…
A: But they are leaf sprung in the back, right?
J: Wrong, you’re thinking about the larger Highway star van now, the Freeway star was always coil sprung in the rear.
A: Yeah, always mixing them up. So, the solution then?
J: Rear axle is similar to Brigadier or Rexetta, so coils from either one will lift it. I somehow feel like the Freeway Star AWD was just hodge-podged together from random IP parts. Luckily, I have lots of garbage pile bargains from work…

Some work with the spring compressor later, and the van had a higher, more offroad friendly stance.

A: Do you think that this will need any further modifications?
J: Not much, actually. The good thing is that it will fit about everything we need in case of a breakdown in the cargo compartment, I think that some lighting will be good, so we will slap on some LED light bars and call it a day, and a grille guard and better skidtray probably won’t hurt either. Roof racks and stuff, I actually doubt it, carrying more stuff with us will just weigh down the van, it already has good A/T tyres, nah, I think we keep this kind of stock.
M: But…white? Come on.
A: Yeah, flat black or something would be cool.
J: Yes, and the boss will probably not be happy if it still has the stickers from the dealership on it when participating in something like this. Yeah, Marie, we trust your artistic talent here.

The day after, they find Marie in front of the van in the garage, close to being passed out.

A: Marie, what the fuck are you doing?
M: …hyyyyuuurrrrggghhh…
J: YOU PAINTED THE VAN FUCKING BUBBLEGUM PINK?
M: …hyyyyuuurrrrggghhh…
A: WHY DID YOU PAINT THE VAN BUBBLEGUM PINK?
M: …hyyyyuuurrrrggghhh…
J: Marie, are you dead or something?
M:…hyyyyuuurrrrggghhh… yes… …hyyyyuuurrrrggghhh…
A: Good, then I can empty the last ones of your beerca…
M: GET YOUR GODDAMNED…hyyyyuuurrrrggghhh…HANDS OFF MY…hyyyyuuurrrrggghhh…BEEercans…hyyyyuuurrrrggghhh…
J: Seriously, what were you thinking here?
M: Uuunghhh…where is the freight train that ran me over… uhhh… Well, why the fuck is the van pink…I thought that it was flat black…
A: Seriously, how drunk do you have to be if you can’t spot the difference between pink and flat black?
M: …hyyyyuuurrrrggghhh…
J: Yes, I AM PRETTY DAMN SURE THAT HYYYYUUURRRRGGHHH IS THE RIGHT ANSWER IN THAT CASE! (sigh…)
A: Well, no time to fix this, it will have to do…


Not exactly a beauty, but probably the Hillbilly Rollers van will at least be seen during the 2022 shitbox rally…
TO BE CONTINUED…

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It’s glorious.

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I can’t stop laughing, and that is downright glorious! Yeah, they’ll be noticed.

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I share sentiment of Madrias in regards of reaction.

I did expected that artist would make it considerably more colorful, but yes, im hardly going to complain about one of likely most memorable entries vehicle-wise

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If it’s reliable. it may last you a lifetime, long after the challenge.

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Prologue

Aidan's family mechanic shop (JDM Specialists Ireland)

February 10th, 2022

Dublin, Ireland

Local time: 4:20 PM

Weather: Sunny and Clear


Owen (Calculator) was ecstatic that Aidan let him drive the Magistrate all the way back to Dublin. There was no way he’d let Owen drive his car that distance and besides, Owen said he wanted to drive it and this was the best way to let him do that.

Karl and Pavel were waiting for them as they arrived. Pavel was unfazed and simply watched the car pull in while Karl watched in awe.

“Interesting choice friends. I’ve never seen a touring estate as big as this one.”

“You’ve got Owen to thank for it.” Aidan said climbing out of his car. “The Magistrate Vanguard 4x4 I think its called?”

Owen nodded. “Yeah.”

“Anyway, we’ve gotta modify it. The car already came with the roof rack, and the offroad mods but we still need some more things to make it useable.”

Aidan then turned around to his team.

“Right, Listen to me gentlemen. We’ve got until the first to modify this car and get it to America. Doc, I need you to go and get the food for the journey, preferably tinned fruits, frozen meat, anything non perishable will do. Pavel, You are to find a 10 gallon fuel tank and figure out a way to get us to the United States. Owen, you and me will straighten out all the issues with this thing and then you’ll help me modify it. Max, I need you to go and get us a camp stove, fuel for it and any sort of other camping equipment you can find. Now, does anyone have any questions?”

No one made any moves to ask questions.

“Are we good then?” he asked.

Everyone nodded.

“Good, lets go!”

Through out the week, lots of progress was made. Pavel had found a 10 gallon fuel tank and left it at the shop for Owen and Aidan to install. Max had gone on a shopping spree and not only bought a camp stove and fuel, but also bought a bunch of kerosene canisters and a couple five gallon water jugs. Karl had not gone to buy food, stating that it would be unnecessary to buy so much this early. So, he decided to help out in the shop.


February 20th, 2022 (10 Days Remain)

Dublin, Ireland.

Local time: 5:50 PM

Weather: Clear


After nearly two weeks of tinkering, they finally managed to tune the engine to run on DX-1*. The team also managed to get the secondary fuel system running and got the car running properly without a single shortcoming. They hadn’t packed up the supplies yet as the rally was still 8 days away, so they just put all of it in Aidan’s office and left it. The weapons Pavel “bought” had arrived and had also been stored in the office.

Eventually, the time came to take the Magistrate on it’s first drive. So, the team met at the shop again to take the Magistrate on its first test drive. Karl had brought Gunther along since this was such a momentous occasion. Karl (Doc), Pavel, Max (Bushwhacker), Aidan (Commando), Owen (Calculator) and Gunther were all ready to go.

“This is a proud moment for us.” said Max “I think it’s the first time we’ve done something together.”

Aidan Nodded

“Yep. But we can’t celebrate just yet, we’ve still got to see if it runs first.”

Pavel came back from his bathroom trip.

“Pavel is excited, even if American cars do not fill him with confidence.”

After kicking away the lift arms, Aidan and the crew got in the car. Owen nestled himself in the passenger seat while Max and Karl sat in the back seat and Pavel since he’s absolutely massive decided not to sit in the center rear seat and chose to sit in the cargo area with Gunther. Aidan glanced around the cabin and once satisfied with everyone’s positions he turned around and put the key in the ignition.

“Right. Everybody ready?”

“Just get on with it.” Owen said, annoyed.

A twist of the key brought the electrics online, and then Aidan pushed the key further and then the starter motor began cranking. Not more than a second later, the engine turned over with a triumphant roar. It was hard not to rev the engine but it was not wise to do so to avoid risking damaging it.

Grabbing the steering column shift mount, Aidan shifted it into reverse and began to back it out of the bay. So far nothing had gone wrong, but there was suspense like no other in the cabin. Everyone was just waiting for something to go wrong. When they backed out into the street everyone stayed silent. And when they got to the end of the street, still nothing. But it wasn’t until they made it to the next intersection when they began cheering with Gunther joining, who had to resort to howling. They passed around fist bumps and high fives around the cabin, proud of themselves and each other.


So there you go, Team Oil Crisis is now officially ready for the 2022 Shitbox Rally. Now they just have to find a way to get to America. *DX-1 is a 84 octane fuel used in Fox Corportation low power generators.

TO BE CONTINUED

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TEAM HILLBILLY ROLLERS
PROLOGUE PART 0.3 - Viva la IP 4Z

ANDREAS: Wait…I read through the rules again…what the fuck? It says that there will be no fuel available except for…kerosene?
JANNE: Yeah and water is wet, so?
ANDREAS: What do you mean?
JANNE: Don’t forget that the IP 4Z engine is more or less an agricultural/industrial unit.
ANDREAS: …so?
JANNE: And the military uses the 4Z engine in electric generators, made to run on very low grade fuel.
ANDREAS: Uhm…interesting.
JANNE: I have one of those cylinder heads behind the barn, will lower compression ratio by a fair margin. Setting up a pre-heating system is a walk in the park. The dizzy is still a standard unit for all of the production time so timing can be retarded as long as you have a 13 mm wrench. Also, if that’s still not enough, there is still a simple single point injection system where you only have to screw on a potentiometer in the ECU to make the fuel mix more rich, but that should not be necessary I think.
ANDREAS: I start to think that this was a very wise choice of vehicle, unlike in some of the earlier races.
JANNE: Yeah, but how about the wise choice of paint.
MARIE: Shut up, it is nice now when I slapped on the starting number!


And finally, the retina burning van was ready for the big event coming. TO BE CONTINUED…

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and i just realized that my 76 horses wagon entry is outclassed by like, literally everyone else ffs, like this shit can’t even reach 100 km/h under 14 seconds

not that i’m really worried tho as I wanted to focus on reliability more on my entry

“There once was a legend from El Camina, is there Huracan (no, its not named after Lamborghini’s latest V10 supercar), the ancient Caminan god of weather, have the abilities to set a light that can humans could go through space and time to see the future, and whilst its just a myth, we still can’t explain that some events of time travel was reportedly happening in this universe…”

PROLOGUE

2022, somewhere in Nevada

The girls searched for resources that are contained in the wagon. They found an unopened can of Pepsi, a bag of chips, a broken key, and some cash. Frustrated by the lack of items they proceeded to drive to find somewhere to stay.

After a while they have arrived at an secluded space near the road. They decided to stay there as its night time and went to sleep.


2nd March 2022, somewhere near Las Vegas Motor Speedway

7:00 AM

Carol Lee, head editor and host of Drivers.com (look here and here for more info about her) got up early from her hotel to test drive the brand new Altus XE-6, the firm’s latest entry-level offering as well as the first ever V6 supercar ever built from the company.

She was driving the car briskly along the road, while talking through the camera that she set up for the review.

(C - Carol)

C: “So, what could possibly be wrong with this car? Nothing, I should say. Its not the greatest not the most powerful of the lineup, but it really means that small packages can have big surprises. And that’s the XE-6…wait a sec, a French car in America? With El Caminan plates? No way. How…”

Suddenly, Carol saw the blue Claussient parking beside the location she started the video with. Upon seeing that she slowed down the car and came out of it, then approached the wagon.

Back at the car…

M: “Hey, Maria, check out, there’s some sports car and the driver is approaching us! We’re saved!”

“L: Erm…that car looks…odd. Is this 2006 again? That car looks too advanced…and…”

“M: Movie set, probably. Gasmean filmmakers were here as I knew it from Facebook…”

Carol approached the car and saw the girls inside

C: Hello? Is there’s anyone?

Both girls came out of the car. They saw a woman in her early thirties with long black hair, wearing a black shirt and jeans.

L: “Who are you, mademoiselle?”

C: “Carol Lee, from Drivers.com. Who are you both and why you’re in a car? Travellers maybe? I think…”

*M: “Driver what? I don’t know what are you saying…”

Suddenly, Carol’s phone rang. She took out her phone which is a blue iPhone 13 Mini.

*M: “Wait. An Apple phone? No way this is real, we’re in a movie set.”

Carol stared at Maria

"C: “The what? We’re not in a movie set, this is 2022 and iPhones are like everywhere. Unless you’re living in a rock beyond 2007, which is unlikely since you’re…”

Lucia and Maria were shocked upon hearing the situation.

L: “2022…16 years have passed…the fuck.”

C: “Huh? Then when you’re came from? 2006? No way, I was in secondary school back then.”

The girls explained to Carol about what happened and told about. Although she was still unconvinced about what Lucia and Maria said, she still gladly take them to a place for a stay.

[TBC]


Fallen Angels of The Past

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1400 kg van, around 97 hp after detuning it, 4 speed auto. You beat me by 2 seconds to 100…
But as far as I have understood it, speed is not the most important factor here.

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Despite having a mere V6 engine, that car is an awe-inspiring machine in its own right - and an attractive one too. You might as well showcase it here for those who are interested - complete with lore and mechanical specs.

0-100 in 12.5 second for me, but the four on the floor gearbox and almost 2.1 ton weight means I top out at 166km/h. :stuck_out_tongue: Don’t think it’ll take you long to overtake me haha.

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About the same top speed then. A forward control van is like a barn door against the wind. :stuck_out_tongue:

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@BannedByAndroid

They need to be present on site on 1st March in range from 6am to 6pm as per this post

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Ah, fuck, forgot about it.

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