Cool Wall Three: Not Cool (Complete!)

Community Challenges & Competitions
182

Judging Part Six: Practical Concerns

Worst Score:

Halvson Harrier (23.5) - The Harrier is hurt by the way the game calculates practicality. It has 2 doors and 2 seats. The game doesn’t care if it’s a supercar or a ute, that hurts your practicality. Oof.

Middle Of The Pack:


Dongsun SDC, Nishiki Classic (Jeez, I transcribed a lot of these wrong) (54.7 Points) - A two-way tie, right at the median! Wow! It’s legitimately impressive to have this happen.

The Best:

Shocker, right? Besides the humour of the same top and bottom 2 rounds in a row, this car is what you would expect to see doing well here. The Harrier did poorly due to few seats and few doors. This has 5 doors and 6 seats. Do the maths.

Scores For Practicality
Scores So Far
  • Bazard Rikkett by @Edsel : -15.2 Points (Down 3 places)
  • Halvson Harrier by @lotto77 : -14.8 Points (Down 4 places. Massive F in the chat)
  • Rossel F12 by @Fayeding_Spray : -13.5 Points
  • Courageux Mille by @mart1n2005 : -10.6 Points (Up 2 places)
  • Capital k6 Custom by @Prium : -9.1 Points (Up 4 places)
  • Waldersee Markgraff by @Texaslav : -6.7 Points (Up 1 place)
  • Wells LC by @DuceTheTruth100 : -0.6 Points
  • Nishiki Classic by @BannedByAndroid : 6.5 Points (Down 2 places)
  • Dongsun SDC by @Hilbert : 7.8 Points (Down 3 places)
  • Zerve Kaveat by @Restomod : 11.6 Points (Up 1 place)
  • Durendal LeGrand by @GassTiresandOil : 14.2 Points (Down 2 places)
  • Morabia Jestrab by @Maverick74 : 14.8 Points (Down 2 places)
  • GSI Banlieue by @oppositelock : 15.4 Points (Up 2 places)
  • Mara Kanyon by @AndiD : 16.1 Points (Down 3 places)
  • Fuji Ikigai by @Caligari : 17.2 Points (Up 7 places!)
  • Mons Amis by @cake_ape : 22.0 Points (Up 1 place)
  • IP Freeway Star by @Knugcab : 30.1 Points (Up 1 place)
9 Likes
183

I’m going to be upset if I don’t lose now

184

5 Likes
185

Daym. O.o

186

Hipsterdom score please come to rescue my car lmao

3 Likes
187

Oh, and… Each one of these does take a non-zero amount of effort to write, I have noticed a couple of issues with my data on certain stats (luckily not reviewed yet) and I have a couple of thoughts on the end post, so… remainder of judging will come tomorrow.

9 Likes
188

Judging Part 7: Prestige Worldwide

Worst Score:

Bazard Rikkett (6.7 Points) - That’s not a typo, the Bazard has single-digit prestige. A 1.3L i3 is a modern engine config for a reason - you need modern forced induction to get a usable amount of power from it. This i3 puts out a meager 36.4 hp. Then we get the interior, which is literally the cheapest it gets - basic and no entertainment. There is nothing to show off. It should be noted that I very briefly considered slapping on a penalty for the low power, but:

  • It didn’t throw a warning for underpowered engine, because this thing is so dang light. It uses the smallest body currently in the game, and even has the weight slider tuned for a little less weight.
  • It’s an era-accurate amount of power.
  • It still gets to 100 km/h. Just not uphill.

Middle Of The Pack:

Dongsun SDC (24.2 Points) - Being a convertible and having a premium CD player will boost prestige. Having a sensible, refrained i4… less so. It certainly looks like middling prestige.

The Best:

Waldersee Markgraff (41.7 Points) - Plenty of people went with a V6, but the Waldersee has the biggest, and almost the most powerful. Where the Waldersee wins, however, is putting the lux in luxobarge. It’s the biggest of the lot, the heaviest of the lot, and It somehow manages to squeeze a luxury interior into this price range. It’s the ultimate showoff.

Scores For Prestige
Scores So Far
  • Bazard Rikkett by @Edsel : -30.2 Points
  • Rossel F12 by @Fayeding_Spray : -23.1 Points (Down 1 place)
  • Courageux Mille by @mart1n2005 : -16.2 Points (Down 1 place)
  • Halvson Harrier by @lotto77 : -7.7 Points (Up 2 places)
  • Capital k6 Custom by @Prium : -6.4 Points
  • Dongsun SDC by @Hilbert : 7.8 Points (Down 3 places)
  • Waldersee Markgraff by @Texaslav : 8.3 Points (Up 1 place)
  • Zerve Kaveat by @Restomod : 8.5 Points (Down 2 places)
  • Morabia Jestrab by @Maverick74 : 8.8 Points (Down 3 places)
  • GSI Banlieue by @oppositelock : 9.3 Points (Down 3 places)
  • Wells LC by @DuceTheTruth100 : 12.9 Points (Up 4 places)
  • Mara Kanyon by @AndiD : 14.7 Points (Down 2 places)
  • Nishiki Classic by @BannedByAndroid : 14.9 Points (Up 5 places)
  • Fuji Ikigai by @Caligari : 15.2 Points (Down 1 place)
  • Durendal LeGrand by @GassTiresandOil : 24.1 Points (Up 4 places)
  • Mons Amis by @cake_ape : 26.5 Points
  • IP Freeway Star by @Knugcab : 33.7 Points
11 Likes
189

Judging Part 8: Absolute Comfort

Worst Score:

Bazard Rikket (4.4 Points) - If you read the last judging pane, this won’t shock you. A basic interior with no entertainment is a death sentence to any sort of comfort. I get why you had to do it, of course - even with 0.2 wear, you were using up all the budget, and any radio in 1947 is premium. Still, not comfortable at all.

The Middle Of The Pack:

IP Freeway Star (28.1 Points) - The IP Freeway Star has all the ingredients to score higher here, but it dies a death of a thousand cuts. You get a premium interior with premium entertainment. There is not a single bench or jump seat in sight… But the geared LSD robs you of half a point over open or viscous, the all-terrain tyres subtract half a point over medium, the rear spring is just a little too stiff so that subtracts another point, Automation hates manuals so that subtracts another 5 points. Swapping to Viscous LSD and 4-speed Advanced Auto, then softening the rear springs and adjusting the dampeners to compensate would put this car in fourth place. Instead, it’s solidly in the middle.

The Best:

When I said this thing puts the luxury in luxobarge, I wasn’t kidding. Soft independent suspension, luxury interior, and plenty of little stuff like variable power steering and progressive springs. The only mark against it is being a 2+2. That’s it.

Scores For Comfort
Scores So Far
  • Bazard Rikkett by @Edsel : -45.2 Points
  • Rossel F12 by @Fayeding_Spray : -31.0 Points
  • Courageux Mille by @mart1n2005 : -23.6 Points
  • Capital k6 Custom by @Prium : -4.5 Points (Down 1 place)
  • GSI Banlieue by @oppositelock : -0.9 Points (Down 5 places)
  • Halvson Harrier by @lotto77 : 0.0 Points (Up 2 places)
  • Morabia Jestrab by @Maverick74 : 1.2 Points (Down 2 places)
  • Dongsun SDC by @Hilbert : 2.5 Points (Up 2 places)
  • Zerve Kaveat by @Restomod : 4.1 Points (Up 1 place)
  • Wells LC by @DuceTheTruth100 : 14.1 Points
  • Fuji Ikigai by @Caligari : 14.1 Points (Leads by 0.0680, Down 3 places)
  • Mara Kanyon by @AndiD : 17.6 Points
  • Nishiki Classic by @BannedByAndroid : 19.4 Points
  • Waldersee Markgraff by @Texaslav : 23.3 Points (Up 7 whole places)
  • Durendal LeGrand by @GassTiresandOil : 28.8 Points
  • IP Freeway Star by @Knugcab : 33.7 Points (Down 1 place)
  • Mons Amis by @cake_ape : 39.6 Points (Up 1 place)
10 Likes
190

I ded

191

Nice to see my wacky wittle wagon performing so well! :D

(I knew it wasn’t going to be extraordinary given it’s age, but I’m still impressed it’s managing to fail this hard. At this rate, I’ll be shocked if my car’s end score is even positive.)

2 Likes
192

Thankyou Prestige round, THANKYOU.

1 Like
193

Judging Part 9: Driving The Car

Worst Score:

Courageux Mille (26.7 Points) - Yeah, a lot of these worst cars have already been given away by previous stuff. What can I say, this thing just loves to oversteer? That kills the drivability, more than anything else. :man_shrugging:

Middle Of The Pack:

Dongsun SDC (50.3 Points) - Dongsun: It Is A Car. Another middling result for the Dongsun. There’s not really a lot it does wrong, just others are better.

The Best:

Mons Amis (73.1 Points) - A modern car, with modern assists, modern gearbox, flat torque, and a smooth platform. It’s agile, it’s small, it’s easy. How you got this much drivability at this price with decent comfort is beyond me. Just how?

Scores For Drivability
Scores So Far
10 Likes
194

Judging Part 10: Cash Is King

Scores in this part were obtained by the following process:
Cost=Purchase Cost + Inflation-Adjusted 5-Year Costs
Inflation-Adjusted 5-Year Costs = n * One-Year Running Costs
n = 1 + 0.95 + 0.95^2 + 0.95^3 + 0.95^4 = 4.52-ish
One-Year Running Costs = Modified SVC + Fuel Costs

Worst Score:

Wells LC (17865 dollars) - Staggered Tyres and the thirstiest engine of the lot won’t do you any favours here. The fuel cost for this alone is almost more expensive than cheapest option!

Middle Of The Pack:

Moravia Jestrab (11608 dollars) - So many of these median reviews are just middling, balanced cars. The Moravia doesn’t have any special sauce, or anything holding it back. It’s one of the cheaper initial cost cas, but that’s about it.

The Best:

Mara Kanyon (9466 dollars) - This is a certified Mara moment. It’s cheap. The initial purchase price is under 2000 dollars, because this car has been through the wringer with its 0.35 wear. That 0.35 wear was not required. This car would have been legal with 0 wear. Mara means cheap though, and I commend the dedication. I love Mara.

Scores For Cost
Scores So Far

The final round, with the cool wall rankings, will come at some point in the next 48 hours. It is 3 AM for me, I am busy tomorrow, and the more I look at the cars the more I am considering moving them on the wall.

15 Likes
195

Well, consiering the huge job you have done with this during the weekend, taking it easy for a while probably won’t upset anyone. Take the time you need!

4 Likes
196

Seriously! I know you said you had prepped a lot beforehand but that’s still a lot of entries to go through. :slight_smile:

197

I echo the others, great job! Quick turn around and fun to see the verdicts roll in. You have all stats logged, so no worries about a game update messing up the remainder of judging - take your time :blush:

198

When a year’s worth of effort culminates in a single paragraph in a post. :joy:

No, seriously, great job - and I actually wonder a bit about the ‘wear’ figure. I remember being a bit at a loss when deciding on a sensible value. Would .35 be somewhat on the high side for a 15+ year workhorse, quite well-maintained, but not restored or anything?

199

Sure, AndiD has a point, if I should give some constructive criticism about this challenge, I think that the wear figure should have been explained better. Is “0” an example that has been in a vacuum chamber since new, or a vehicle that has been as well maintained as an used car can be? Is “0.5” the same as “average” - or better, or worse? Is “1” the same as “well worn but in working condition” or “a lemon heading for the junkyard”? Is “0.2” on a 1960 car the same as “0.2” on a 2000 car? I feel that a chart that at least listed some of the grades would have been handy.

Just a minor thing that I noticed though - you are doing a great job with this, no question about it.

3 Likes
200

Judging Part 11: The Final Countdown

In the previous segments of judging, I judged one score and a small sector of cars. Not here. No, I am going to write up the entire wall.. Mostly. Some cars will br grouped, and you will see why.
Waldersee Markgraff, Wells LC

Photo102_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 102 KB

HiResPhoto69_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 109 KB

Both of these fall to the same issue. They are cool sports cars. On any other cool wall, that would work well. For a hipster though? It looks like they try too hard, and like they are common as far as cool cars go. The Wells gets -3 for obscurity and 0 for authenticity. The Waldersee gets 4 for both, because it is just that little bit weirder, with the sloped European rear and the wheel covers.

Mara Kanyon, Zerve Kaveat, Durendal LeGrand, Moravia Jestrab

CW3-Kanyon-2.jpg1920×1080 183 KB

HiResPhoto37_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 183 KB

HiResPhoto28_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 168 KB

HiResPhoto2_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 290 KB

In the original post, I cautioned that Wagons and SUVs should not feel like normal family cars. These four… Feel like fairly normal, mundane family cars. The Durendal has that wood panelling, but take that away and you get an average family car. The Durendal gets 2 points for obscurity, and 3 for authenticity.
The Zerve and the Mara are both proto-family SUVs, I suppose. They exist in a space before everything was an SUV, and have some bona fide offroad styling. Perhaps I am being somewhat harsh, perhaps they are hurt by being so similar. Either way, they both get 6 points for Obscurity and 8 for Authenticity, saved by their offroad aesthetic.
What of the Jestrab then? Well, it feels even more common than the Durendal, so it gets a measly single point for Obscurity. However… It is profoundly uncool. The proportions are all wrong. It’s ugly. And that is why Dominic likes it. It’s a car so uncool, only someone with an unshakable confidence of their coolness could drive it. 15 points for Authenticity.

Bazard Rikkett, Rossel F12, Courageux Mille Deluxe, GSI Banlieue

HiResPhoto58_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 102 KB

Photo80_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 134 KB

Photo58_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 60.4 KB

GSI Banlieue B.jpg1920×1017 296 KB

These cars all get good Authenticity scores because they are old. Hipsters like old, and these all look the part.
One of these cars is not like the others, though. The GSI Banlieue has a hatchback silhouette which became an enduring design motif in the coming years… And that, I am afraid, makes it less obscure. It looks like a common hatchback, so it only gets 8 Obscurity but a solid 14 Authenticity. The others, because they all look so clearly and shockingly old, get 18. The Mille gets 15 Auth, for its normal shape; the Rossel gets 16 and the Bazard gets 18.

Capital k6 Custom, Nishiki Classic

Photo43_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 169 KB

One of these, like before, is old - albeit not quite as old as the last group. One of these… Is not. Yet they both look so similar, and are styled so similarly, that they get the same score. 14 Obscurity, 13 Authenticity. Perhaps this is another case where they lose out due to duplication. Perhaps.

Fuji Ikigai, IP Freeway Star

Photo67_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 118 KB

Photo32_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 201 KB

Two weird but cool vans, these are pretty nice! The Fuji is unquestionably the weirdest one, because those refined Japanese Kei cars just don’t exist in America… But other than being fun-sized, it feels normal. The IP, I don’t know, it just has a certain charisma to it. Maybe I am biased, I just like it. The Fuji gets 18&15, the IP gets 17&17.

Halvson Harrier, Dongsun SDC

Photo35_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 159 KB

Photo34_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 115 KB

To me, these two are the most normal weird cars. The Halvson is very definitely a weird Proton-style ute (for better or for worse, my associations with Proton are “deathtrap”). The Dongsun is a weird Korean coupe. I personally do not view the Halvson as obscure… but an american sure would. The Halvson gets 13&16, the Dongsun gets 9&15.

Mons Amis

Photo62_1,920-1,080.jpg1920×1080 135 KB

The Mons Amis represents an error, on my part. The more I look at it, the more it looks like an overwrought, manufactured and deliberate attempt to feel cool by an out-of-touch company that just doesn’t get it. It feels like… like…

A stupid PT Cruiser. (Or, I suppose, a New Beetle.)

The car I said would score well if it wasn’t an old person’s car.

Makes sense. That’s what Cake said it was competing with.

II am giving this car 15 and 13 points. Not because I think my hipster wants it, but because I think it is unfair for Cake to work on false premises with the wall. The -2 is for the fact you threw everything at it - wood panelling, wheel covers, roof rack, bike rack.

Final Scores

Wells LC by @DuceTheTruth100 : -12.9 Points
Rossel F12 by @Fayeding_Spray : -8.1 Points
Bazard Rikkett by @Edsel : -7.8 Points
Courageux Mille Deluxe by @Mart1n2005 : -4.5 Points
Capital k6 Custom by @Prium : 0.5 Points
Morabia Jestrab by @Maverick74 : 18.3 Points
GSI Banlieue by @oppositelock : 19.3 Points
Zerve Kaveat by @Restomod : 19.6 Points
Waldersee Markgraff by @Texaslav : 20.2 Points
Dongsun SDC by @Hilbert : 28.2 Points
Durendal LeGrand by @GassTiresandOil : 37.9 Points
Halvson Harrier by @lotto77 : 38.4 Points
Nikishi Classic by @BannedByAndroid : 44.9 Points
Fuji Ikigai by @Caligari : 51.4 Points
Mara Kanyon by @AndiD : 54.3 Points
IP Freeway Star by @Knugcab 64.8 Points
Mons Amis by @Cake_Ape : 82.9 Points

The full judging spreadsheet can be found here.

Comments: Overall, I am reasonably happy with how this played out. The comments on how wear works are definitely fair. Every single car submitted here was absolutely wonderfully-made.

19 Likes
201

This was a great challenge, and I throughly enjoyed it! Congrats @cake_ape!