Journey of Ownership 3C - Bahnstormer 1978 [FINISHED]

I think you can stick to the format you have started with, now when you have got it going, things will probably become clear in the end anyway. I would just think twice before using it again.

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Round 3: To Seat or Not Two Seat?


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Backstory Part 1

September 17, 1977, 9am, Internationale Automobil-Ausstellung [exhibition] No.47, Frankfurt am Main, Bundesrepublik Deutschland.

“Guten Morgen Magda, Stefan, herr Jansen! I have good news and bad news. The good news is that hall 4A is repaired. The bad news… that F1 car didn’t just take out a window, it also made a mess of the main access hall, which not only had to be repaired, and has slowed down repairs of the window, but nothing else could get through until earlier today. That includes several exhibits which were also damaged or destroyed, on - from what I gather of an eyewitness report - its pinball-like trajectory. Fortunately, they had demonstrators to replace the floor models, but it’s taking some time, and there are still workers and equipment clogging the hall.”

“Are there any sedans remaining?”

“Suitable ones? Not that I’m aware of. I understand they’re your primary choice?”

“Yes. Stefan’s parents would be the main passengers, and once in a while I have two or more people I’d like to give a ride. As we’ve seen, neither speed, handling, nor looks are mutually exclusive with four doors, so two-doors start further back in the grid, so to speak, and have some catching up to do.”

“Why consider them at all, then?”

"In part because no sedan we’ve seen has better handling than Acceptable. In fact, apart from the Walf, which made some foul-smelling sacrifices to do so, nothing we’ve seen has a sportiness even approximating our Lancier (29.3), while I was hoping to match or exceed it with its replacement. The closest is the Swanson (24.5), followed by the Authié et Dallier (23.0) and the Cerberus (22.7). The rest aren’t even close.

And in part because coupes have the potential to be that much stronger in stylistic form, without any loss of function apart from passenger count.

In general, the questions I ask of a coupe: ‘are you so amazing to drive and/or to look at that I’d be willing not to drive you sometimes? Are you so high quality that it makes up for reduced quantity of how often I can enjoy you?’ The Jansens’ Hörch is rather dull, yawn-inducing, and not especially… anything, really, apart from spacious and reliable. I don’t care for it. But I’ll put up with it for the right two-door counterpart."

“Do you mean two doors or two seats?”

“They’re different extents of the same disadavantage, but practically-speaking, for my purposes, near-synonymous. Seats that are hard to get into or child-sized don’t do me any good, and may as well be absent. I know there are some coupes with sedan-like room, but the body proportions that requires would, in most cases, just as readily fit two more doors.”

They made their way through the teeming crowd, through the construction site in the main access hall, and arrived in the midst of the automotive beauty pageant that was the GT section. And just like with any beauty pageant, not all contestants are created equal. Indeed, some are there for no discernable reason except to make the others look better.

…Or are they?

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1. KHI Stellia ZR8 by @doot

“Grand Touring? I’m sorry, but ‘Grand’ is not the operative word here.”

“Eight lug wheels? On this? Bizarre.”

“Not much flows, not much lines up. The door handles do, and there is some rhyme and reason to the front end styling, it’s just not really stylish. And has nothing to do with the rear, which has a discernable theme that at best is poorly executed, and at worst unsuited for the canvas no matter how implemented. The decorative strips and panels on the side forming a Z are ok, but as far as looks go, the small, compact-proportioned, and extremely boxy basic shape, unappealing for the segment in the first place, isn’t improved by the details.”

“Maybe if it’s thought of as an upscale city or commuter car rather than a GT?”

“Hmm… that viewpoint has merit. From that perspective, the car begins to look cute in a good way, not in an ironic way. But 41900 is a hell of a lot of upscale for a city car, and it doesn’t look that premium no matter what type.”

“Maybe it’s meant to be a Q-ship, looks underselling its performance?”

“That doesn’t work, either; it’s too loudly decorated to be stealthy. At the same time, Überholprestige… isn’t there.”

Ain't no one movin' over for this. Even if they mostly should.

“How much performance is it trying to sell anyway?”

“233hp? Pah! Compared to what we’ve seen…”

Ursula had been studying the engineering summary longer than usual, gears upstairs audibly turning. At this, she interjected.

"Ah, not so fast… and I don’t mean the Stellia… because here’s where it gets interesting, and potentially redeemable. This is by some margin the lightest car we’ve seen - a mere 1056kg, thanks to a good-quality chassis with full alu paneling, and not much of it - the 2.4m wheelbase is the shortest so far. The relatively modest 233hp from a 3.5L V8 ends up a lot more effective than it would in a more typical candidate. Specifically, the power/weight ratio is middle-of-the-pack, as are straight-line performance metrics, while there are major advantages in agility and economy.

Handling we’d have to test firsthand, but from what I can see, I’d expect it to be easily among the best here despite the modest tires.

For most automotive desiderata, light weight is a heavy bonus. The major exception is ride comfort, where more weight is generally a good thing. Without getting too deep into technicalities and math - if I start writing out work integrals, we’ll be here all day - the ideal of ride comfort is maintaining a steady course in an inertial plane, with minimal acceleration in any direction. When a car goes over a bump, it encounters a force that accelerates the tire, wheel, control arm, subframe (if applicable), frame (if applicable), body, seat, and ultimately our backsides. The more mass that force acts upon, the less it’s accelerated. Put another way, the heavier a moving object is, the more it takes to knock it off its course - in the vertical axis by bumps; the lateral axis, by crosswinds; the longitudinal, by driveline pulsations, though all three and other factors overlap in complex ways. So a lightweight car, all else held constant, is inherently less comfortable because the same forces - same bumps and such - knock it off its course more than they would a heavy car.

Besides this inherent difference, there are some patterns and tendencies among lighter cars - they’re typically smaller and less spacious; cheaper and with lower-quality seats, soundproofing, and other comfort features; and with shorter wheelbases that add another dimension to the physics of suspension behavior and ride comfort. Those tendencies aren’t inherent, and some of them - interior quality, notably - don’t apply here, but when they do, they further widen the comfort gap between a light and heavy car.

Which makes the Stellia’s comfort rating, despite the less-than-limo-like size and weight, somewhat remarkable: 44.5 when adjusted for gearbox and torque penalties, 36.1 raw. While that’s near the bottom of the competition, it’s still comfortably (sorry) above the Lancier’s 38.2 adjusted and 30.0 raw, which was satisfactory to begin with. In fact, this is so far the only car not made of cheese to satisfy the requirement that both Sportiness and Comfort improve.

As for economy… get this: so far we’ve mostly seen numbers in the low teens for highway, and mid-high teens combined. The Stellia? On the highway, less than seven liters. Combined, just under eight. That’s just about half of the average competitor. From what I see of the specs, part credit goes to simply being small and lightweight, and part to the gearing. It absolutely loafs at 110, turning under 1500rpm, where it’s making just enough power to reasonably cruise without downshifting much. In most cars, this would lug the engine, but the weight lets it get away with this and make big gains in not only economy but also NVH. The latter was already off to a good start, being smooth (76.0) and quiet (27.2 effective). The former is ok - 21.2% efficiency - and helped a lot by the size of the engine and the load it’s asked to move. Five gears to choose from, and a wide powerband, help the low weight in keeping performance more than acceptable despite the supercruise gear.

You know… I’m as unimpressed with the styling as you are, but the way the machine side of it is set up tickles the outside-the-box, weird-shit-that-works side of me. I realize that likely doesn’t redeem it in the end as a replacement for your Lancier, but I think for the sake of a learning experience you should give the Stellia a testdrive, just to see what I mean by a proper driveline setup."

“Hm, I’ll think about it. Yes, the looks don’t suit me or this car’s purpose at all, but it appears to do a couple of things very right and in a unique way. With the solid materials and component quality, as well as a properly competitive interior (though the bench seat in the back is bullcheese), I see what they were going for - a practical economy car with bona fide luxury and performance credentials as well - and even though I’ll pass, if there’s time after seeing the rest, I might give it a try anyway. It’s not what I want, but it’s interesting.”


Design concept: D+. Unlike the Mara, this at least shows some evidence of decorative attempt…
Design execution: C- …that doesn’t much succeed.
Engineering concept: A. An unorthodox approach to the mission, and functionally, apart from passenger room, a very successful one.
Engineering execution: A-. A bit of brake fade, some suspension rate mismatch, and I’ve just about run out of nits to pick.

A shining example of: how to set up a powertrain.

Verdict: Declined. Rank TBA.


2. Novalina Belintino by @Mart1n2005

“And now, a GT car that properly looks like one!”

“The styling is quite well done. Reserved, even conservative in places. Just the right degree of modern. Just the right amount of visual features, and without exception that I can see, they’re well chosen and well placed.”

“It has a clean, I daresay Scandinavian look to it. But the name is Italian…?”

Olaf offered some insight into the name. “Maybe some related language? When I was a Bürgermeister, I had a lot of contact with the Italian consulate on the same block, and learned some of the language. I’m no expert or linguist, let alone a native speaker, but ‘Belintino’ sounds strange to my ears; those vowels aren’t happy with each other.”

“It appears to actually be American. At least, it has an American engine. Or wherever it’s made, its parameters are quintissentially American. I’m not aware of any Italian road car engine ever made to displace seven liters. Not many tuned like this, either: oversquare, all iron, pushrods, fairly mild cams and fuel map. It has a modern electronic port injection system and actually makes good power, otherwise it’s as much of a dinosaur as the… what was that other faux-Italian Yank Tank? Malefi? Mafiali…?”

“Bellomont Amalfi Signature d’Elegance german spec not really.”

“Yeah, that one… The other American engine we saw, in the Waldersee, was thirsty and a bit rough, but the rest of its qualities kept it a viable option. How about this one?”

“Not good news, I’m afraid. For starters, it has the third worst thermal efficiency, ahead of the Mara and the Authié et Dallier. Those, however, had engines barely half the size of this one, at 4 and 3.5 liters respectively, and both cars were lighter than the Novalina (1453kg) - the Mara slightly (1413) and the AeD by a lot (1170). Then we get to the transmission - a three-speed slushbox, without a locking torque converter. Fuel economy comes to an unsurprisingly awful 14.6 L highway, and 18.4 combined.”

“Bleh. It’s not like I can’t afford to feed it, but drinking so much only to waste it through such an ineffiicient transmission… that I don’t want in the first place…Does it redeem itself somewhere?”

Ursula pored over the spec sheet. “Redemption is a matter of (your) judgement, but it’s not without its merits. The brakes and suspension are somewhat well set up, and the interior is supposed to be very high quality. Shall we take a look?”

Magda looked around for an attendant, finding none. “Let’s see what else, before trying to track down the staff.”

“Honestly, that’s about it, though I will stress that the suspension and interior appear to be the reason it has comparatively excellent comfort (60.3 adjusted), in fact the best we’ve seen so far. Despite a somewhat heavy flywheel (15.7kg) and being oversquare, the engine is barely smoother than the class-trailing Waldersee’s, while being less efficient, less responsive, and a lot louder. Despite the slushbox, it’s fast, at least in a straight line. But from what I gather of the suspension tune, nevermind the gearbox, is that it’s quite dull to drive.”

“What’s with the Americans pretending to be Italian, but apart from the name - and in this case not even that - having as much to do with authentic Italian as a jar of Alfredo sauce?”

“That’s a pass, then?”

“Easily.”


Design concept: B
Design execution: A
Engineering concept: D
Engineering execution: C+

A shining example of: how not to set up a powertrain.

Verdict: Declined. Ranked 16th/19.


3. KMA K650 Coupe 5.0 by @abg7

“Huh? What decade is this?”

“I don’t know, but it’s not this one.”

A denim-jacketed teenager zoomed past on a hoverboard, quickly commented, “Nor the next one!” and vanished in a cloud of flux capacitor flash.

“Yeah, looks some 10-15 years premature. Check out that rear apron!”

“Let’s give it an honest look anyway. Apart from the anachronism, I think it’s rather pretty. I especially like the front end styling. Apron length aside, it’s restrained, tasteful, well-proportioned for a two-seater… oh wait…”

A flash of their passes, and they got inside.

“Someone thought they were being clever trying to stuff four shortened seats into this thing. When they should have morphed the cabin to be longer and/or used a longer wheelbase body in the first place. Four-seater? I call bull. But that’s ok. We’ll evaluate it as a two-seater. Futuristic looks aside, what’s remarkable or noteworthy here?”

“First thing I noticed, besides the above, is the price. Fifty even.”

“Oof. Not impossible by any means, but it has to overcome the reverse-aged cheese, the effectively-two-seater penalty, and now the price tag as well. What do we get for 50 large?”

"Let’s start with under the hood. A thoroughly modern, oversquare 5L V12 making 360hp - all alloy, DOHC 48-valve, EFI with ITB, good quality throughout… cast internals, which it can get away with because of the short 78.9mm stroke and somewhat excessive 10.6kg flywheel.

The internals are good for 7100rpm; much higher than that, and the Standard Mid intake would start to run out of breath and start asking for a much louder type. It’s a smooth (87.1), fairly quiet (28.1 adjusted), powerful, reasonably lightweight (270kg) and reliable (61.5) engine, though the star of this show is the efficiency - 23.4% is excellent for a V12 in 1978, bested only by the Primus’ V8 at 24.1%. That’s the main reason for its outstanding fuel economy by the standards of a 1.5-ton V12–powered automatic - 9.4 liters at 110, 12.3 combined - though the modern body, full cladding, and high-quality, reasonably-geared driveline help.

For comparison, it consumes less overall than your Lancier does at a cruise, while being a lot heavier and not quite twice as powerful."

“What kind of performance does the power and aero add up to?”

“Competitive, not superlative. Top speed of 293kph is fourth in class. 80-120 time is 3.07, middling. Power to weight is fourth. Performance relative to service costs… sixth.”

“I’m sensing a pattern - solid but not remarkable, while it needs some of the latter to make up for its drawbacks, including the price.”

"Let’s see what else… It’s by a significant margin the safest car here - 67.5, followed by the Kurfürst at 61.6. A remarkable detail about this is that the safety package is neutral-quality and not the most advanced available. It’s Advanced 70s, not 80s like some competitors. I wonder if the rating… bureau?.. already knows about how dangerous early airbags can be?

Besides that, the brakes and suspension are both near-as-makes-no-difference perfectly set up. We’ve seen perfect brakes before (Howler, Martinet), and near-perfect suspension rates (Waldersee), but this is even better than the latter, and the only car that has both. That said, I think the brakes could be optimized a bit further to use quieter and cheaper pads, and while spring and shock rates are nearly bang-on, the 5.5 roll angle is… ok, not great."

“I smell cheese… coming from… the tires?”

“Tread widths 225 front, 245 rear. A bit odd, but far from egregious.”

“Also the exterior.”

“Also from the interior, presumably those scaled-down seats.”


“I like the interior styling even though some details are weird, like the door latch next to your bicep, or the apparent total lack of a lower B-pillar; it’s unclear where the doorcard edge is. Lovely colors, though, and a similar good-looking and practical dashboard as on the Primus.”

“So no hand-made interior?”

“No; luxury +3 and a tape deck.”

“Hydropneumatic suspension?”

“No; progressive and monotube.”

“Magnesium wheels?”

“Aluminum alloy.”

“Aluminum paneling or stainless chassis?”

“Steel on galvanized steel.”

“So why does this cost 50k when others are a lot cheaper, better-equipped, and outperform it most everywhere?”

“Beats me.”

“To be fair… nearly everything is good-quality. But in the end, there’s not much to show for it; even reliability (67.5) is a bit below average (70.3 mean, 69.1 median). It’d’ve gotten a lot further had the money been spent on higher-spec equipment, apart from the engine.”

“That pattern mentioned before looks like it’s held - a solid car, no doubt, and the engine is a bit special, but the rest of the car isn’t really, and it’s expensive. Pass.”


Design concept: C-. Good-looking for the most part, but way too modern.
Design execution: B
Engineering concept: B-. Different equipment choices outside of the engine could have made it extraordinary.
Engineering execution: A. But at least the equipment it does have is very well-tuned.

A shining example of: how to set up brakes and suspension.

Verdict: Declined. Rank TBA.

1 Like

4. Howler Poseidon GT by @HowlerAutomotive

Part 1

“Finally, a shooting brake! And quite the looker at that!”

“For being as sparsely decorated as it is, this is stylish! The B-pillar angle is a bit much, otherwise this is spot on.”

“Very efficient styling, if you will - probably the highest ratio of visual success to feature & detail count.”

“Off to a good start. Then again, so was the Novalina…”

“Being a brake isn’t its sole uniqueness. Of what we’ve seen, it also is the only turbo engine, and the only all-wheel-drivetrain.”

“Does it work?”

“I reckon it does, but Norðwagen only recently started working with turbos, so I’m less familiar with them and would need to see for myself.”

The exhibit attendant must have worked as a server in fine dining; they didn’t interrupt the ongoing conversation, yet the moment Magda looked up to get their attention, they noticed and responded immediately. See inside? Why, of course!

“Let me show you this innovative rear access system. We understand that some customers prefer four full-sized seats, and the function of four doors with the look of two. First, the large size of the doors themselves is made even more effective and more functionally robust by being triple-hinged - the door first translates laterally outboard, before rotating around a virtual axis that keeps it close to the car yet open at a wider angle than usual. Then, both front seats are electrically actuated via a settting switch and an occupancy sensor. When the switch is set to Auto, opening one of the doors moves the seat on that side forward and inclines the seatback, that is, if it’s unoccupied. The result…” The attendant opened the passenger door, and with a soft whirr, the passenger seat opened up generous access to the rear cabin.

Now, this was intriguing; Olaf was there mostly for company at this point, but this innovation made for the possibility of Magda having her cake and eating it too: eye-catching shooting brake styling, satisfying shooting brake practicality, yet designed to potentially meet the tall order of reasonably fitting a 195cm rear passenger. She stared for a moment at what appeared to be a well-thought-through and possibly game-changing novelty.

“Olaf?”

He knew what to do and got to it. A few moments later, he reported, “Well, I’ll be darned! It’s not as easy as a large sedan, but better than a smaller one. And my eyesight notwithstanding, I can see this is a top-shelf interior, probably hand-made.”

The Michelin-star-grade attendant anticipated Magda’s next words, and by the time she turned to speak them, had produced the usual key and a small map.

“Normally we would have no problem giving you a couple of days with it. Unfortunately, our previous floor model was one of the victims of that F1 car, so we only have one demonstrator left. If you could return it before the end of the day?”


“Olaf, how are you doing back there?”

“To be honest… A+ for idea and effort, but as far as results, it either barely or almost suffices, I’m undecided. When you and Stefan got in, the seats had to move back, and suddenly the room didn’t feel as generous as before.”

Ursula added, "A 2.7-meter wheelbase with these pillar proportions is about average for a midsized sedan, and reasonable to carry average rear passengers. Certain passengers, however, need above-average room for whatever reason. A longer wheelbase is the most obvious solution, but other measures can help: moving the A-pillar forward or the C-pillar back. Specifying two rear seats instead of a bench, on a sufficiently wide body, allows them to be closer together, possibly enough to fit entirely between the wheelwells. Your Lancier and the competing Fenrir both did this, which on a wagon/brake body can be done much farther than a sedan. Poseidon has the potential to do this, but as yet appears not to, so while its legroom is quite alright by midsized sedan standards, it doesn’t compete with the Swanson, Kurfürst, Primus, or Cerberus - all 3.0-meter wheelbase bodies.

Regarding previous interior and legroom comments

On that note, I should clarify previous comments made about legroom in other cars. In some cases, the observation was based on wheelbase selection and body morphs, and taken into account for formal evaluation. In other cases, it was based on interior layout alone, and the comments made were solely in the domain of interior design, not part of the formal evaluation:

The Seawolf’s 2.6 meter wheelbase offers modest room to start, improved slightly by the basic body design being cab-forward, and slightly further by morphs (especially WindscreenLower and CPillarLower). The result fell short of the semifinalists. Legroom was indeed a factor in its formal evaluation, but this was based on morphs, not seat fixtures as I had made it sound.

The Planar, on the other hand, is slightly longer and inherently at least as cab-forward to start, and furthermore has its A-pillar morph all the way forward. Its C-pillar is also all the way forward, but the geometry with a rear bench is such that the pillar isn’t the limiting factor there. Had it been a four-seater, there’d be potential for a Lancier/Fenrir-style squeeze, and then the C pillar would’ve mattered. The Planar was formally deemed to have slightly more legroom than the Seawolf, though this didn’t play a decisive role in its ranking.

The Waldersee incurred a minor penalty for legroom, based on its A-pillar position nearly all the way back. The comment made, however, pertained to interior design only.

The Walf incurred a significant penalty due to beginning with a 2.7m wheelbase, and unlike the Seawolf and Planar, morphing towards a shorter cabin instead of a longer one. In general, the main reason not to maximize cabin length is to keep visually appealing body proportions, but in its case it went so far that the reverse happened, by my eyes anyway."

Part 2

Olaf added, “To call this ‘cramped’ is a stretch, but it’s on the tight side. The seat is very comfortable, however, if not quite as high-quality as the others we’ve seen. And the ride comfort is by some margin the best I’ve ever felt, including the recent sedans. The only reason I’m not asleep is because I’m admiring the embroidery work everywhere. The minimalism of the exterior belies what’s inside; the red and black vertical slats at both bumpers gives a tiny hint of the striking and frankly decadent interior styling. If they don’t already call it Holy Bordello, they should.”

“Indeed, this thing rides on a cloud. Hydraulic suspension, I wonder?”

“Yep. On top of double wishbones all around, reasonably balanced footwork, and everything medium or higher quality. And that engine!”

On the back road leading to the Autobahn onramp, Magda rolled on the throttle. A deep, soft, creamy hum accompanied the potent yet silken wave of torque that shoved them all back in their seats.

“‘Howler’ must be someone’s name, because the engine is anything but. It’s in fact the second-quietest of them all - at 21.1 adjusted, it’s a bit behind the otherwise malaised Bellomont at 19.6, and significantly ahead of the Kurfürst (25.5) and Swanson (28.1). Its 70.0 smoothness is about what you’d expect of a high-quality straight- or flat-six.”

“That was just a brief sample of its Kraft and its Laufkultur. Here comes the onramp to what looks like a quite open Autobahn…”

The Howler had by this point established its first impression - plush, pillowy, exceptionally refined. Very relaxing, not very invigorating. Magda wondered - was there more to its personality? Her right foot decided to find out. Hammer down.

“I’ve been in turbocharged cars before, but if I weren’t an engineer, I’d have a hard time believing this isn’t naturally aspirated. Magda, you’ll have to report on the lag, if any, but I can report that the torque curve is very well-balanced. Whoever tuned this turbo setup knew what they were doing, aimed for a refined and well-rounded boost of power rather than simply going for the biggest numbers, and utterly nailed it.”

“I can’t tell there’s any lag, but it might be masked by the transmission, which despite being a modern advanced 4-speed, is rather soft and lazy. For a GT car making at least faint noises of sportiness, the Poseidon hasn’t got much. At least, not with this kind of driving. At least, not apart from its formidable straight-line performance. It’s so refined that I have to keep looking at the speedometer to be sure how fast I’m going.”

As they approached the exhibition parking lot on the way back, Olaf spoke, “Actually, would you mind taking me home? I wasn’t feeling so great this morning to begin with, and the cheese from the previous car has made me queasy.”


“Since we’re here, do you think Heidi is feeling well enough to come down and try out this seat access system?”

Extracting himself from the posh, cozy depths of the Poseidon’s back seat, Olaf stretched his arms and back, and replied, “Maybe. I’ll go see.”

A minute later, Magda’s mother in law emerged from the house, supported by her cane. She peered quizzically at the sleek burgundy car in her driveway, looking next to her Hörch as a hand-carved solid burl wood bowl might look next to a piece of driftwood. Though unaccustomed to anywhere near this sort of automotive splendor up close, and unsure what to make of it visually, she understood its significance.

"Magda, my dear, I don’t give two hoots for cars as such, but I understand what they mean to you, and I’m deeply proud that my son married someone whose talent and ambition - whose own merits - have carried her life from that of a lost and lonely freshly-escaped free spirit just scraping by, to the point of reasonably and seriously considering buying something like this. I have no idea what this is exactly. But even to the vehicularly clueless, as a symbol of well-earned success, it very much does the job. Though if you ask me, not quite as well as that big sedan you brought here earlier.

I’m also touched that in addition to the guts and brains to escape and build your own life by your own wits, you have the heart to take into consideration my and Olaf’s tired old bones - mine, especially - in the decisionmaking. I’ll humor you all with the spectacle you’re about to see - it’s for my own sake, anyway - but let me preface it: I would graciously accept your chauffeuring us, but it need not be in something of this caliber. The Hörch is perfectly adequate, and the length of its tenure lends it a major factor of comfort with the familiar that no money can buy. You decide whatever you decide, but know that absolutely no part of me would begrudge you the pleasure of a car that’s right for you, regardless of how good it is or isn’t at schlepping us old farts around." Olaf chuckled and nodded in agreement.

Heidi hobbled over to the Poseidon as Stefan opened the passenger door, her eyebrows speaking the amusement by the trick hinge and motorized seat. Her jaw nearly jettisoned her dentures upon seeing the interior. “Mein Herrgott! This is at once magnificient and obscene. I don’t know if I could get used to being in such a space. I don’t know that I want to… or that I’d get un-used to it afterwards. Wow!”

Some moments later, she was seated. Magda approached, closed the passenger door, and entered though the driver’s. “Well, what do you think?”

“I think the Sistine Chapel could sue for lost business. To answer what you meant to ask… it does work. Not as well as a large sedan, but a lot better than a normal coupe. It’s viable.”


“Are you not taking the Autobahn back to the exhibition?”

“No, I specifically want to take the Schlangestraße [snake road] through the hills. We briefly touched 260 on the way to your parents’, so I know what it can do in a straight line. Now I want to see how it performs in the twisties. Your father would have woken up and complained, but I know you won’t. What about you, Ursula?”

“Let me put it this way: I consider a month in which I don’t spend a solid afternoon or two on the Nürburgring in my track-prepped Loki to have been a waste. These seats aren’t heavily bolstered, but I’ll be quite alright. As far as I’m concerned, Magda, swing this beast’s hooves* and make it dance!”

*die Hufe schwingen = literally, “to swing the hooves”, translating variously as “to hurry up” or “to haul ass”


Stefan jogged back from the convenience store with a couple of bratwurst and pretzels. Magda’s silent gaze asked, and he replied, “They said they’re sending a tow truck themselves, and are leaving immediately, to arrive in 20-30 minutes or so.”

“Just long enough for it to cool down so we can at least see what blew.”

“I suspect the first-rate NVH tuning and soundproofing are partly to blame. Most cars that overheat this badly, I can hear it in the engine’s voice before something lets go. But here it’s very quiet, especially with the turbo.”

“I’m surprised how quickly it happened. Then again, on the Autobahn we were mostly cruising at medium or high speed. Lots of airflow, a few slightly prolonged pulls, but fewer and farther between than the Schlangestraße, where WOT was much more frequent and speeds lower.”

Ursula found the car’s spec sheet and began scanning it. Before long, “Aha! I’m quite embarrassed to have missed this detail back in the IAA hall: there is zero airflow dedicated to the radiator; what there is appears to be entirely incidental, haphazard, and random, amounting to half of the cooling capacity this engine needs. Just cruising around with occasional full power, it seems to suffice; the apparently large coolant capacity buffers against such fluctuations, and if they’re infrequent enough, you might never notice. But for a WOT-brake-turn-WOT-brake-turn backnforth at lower speeds, the buffer runs out and the engine overheats.”

At least there was a nice view over the hills they had just traversed. The kind of view that invites the viewer to contemplate its vastness with one half of the mind, and a complex structure of datapoints recently acquired to make a decision with the other. While the datapoints in question were many, the decision made hardly needed a fraction of them.

“I wish I’d read about this before the drive. Not to avoid getting stuck at a gas station between Nirgendwo and Hinterwald, but to avoid the profound disappointment of meeting what might’ve become my automotive hero, bathing in its warmth of beauty and multifaceted competence… only to be doused with cold sewer water, straight from the cesspool of disillusion, as its apparently only real design flaw emerges, a showstopper and a dealbreaker.”

“You had reservations about it prior too, no?”

“Yes, it didn’t really want to be dancing that vigorously anyway. It amounts to the same thing: whether due to its equipment and tuning - automatic, super refined, softly sprung - or… whatever could possibly explain the airflow… this car is totally unsuited for sporty driving, and insofar as it results in mechanical failure, it’s unsuited to an unprecedented degree. Even a Mara would have, if nothing else, survived. The Poseidon’s top-shelf comfort and numerous other merits might compensate in some use cases, but not in mine.”


Design concept: A-
Design execution: A
Engineering concept: B+
Engineering execution: F is for Fatal Flaw. It’d’ve been at least B+ otherwise.

A shining example of: an automotive Achilles and its heel.

Verdict: Declined. Rank TBA.


5. Cascina Dicentra by @Tsundere-kun

“DROOL!”

“Seriously… this is one fine sight to behold.”

“It isn’t terribly original, but there are certainly worse acts to imitate, and worse imitations.”

“The ‘Omega Juliet Quebec’, anyone?”

“Also not terribly original, I don’t think, but it fits.”

“That said, it seems… 90% of the way to complete. It’s all well and right for swoopy curves to be contrasted with rectilinear forms, but some of the contrasts here look more like clashes. The hard lines in the nose work with the curve of the hood, so they’re alright. But the door handles, and to a lesser extent the vents in the B-pillar… they could stand to feel more welcome, better integrated with their big prominent neighbors. There’s also a bit of dissonance in the upper outer corners of the taillights. It’s unclear where the upper door seams are supposed to be. Otherwise I struggle to come up with much, and its eyecandiness remains quite intact all the same.”

“Any brawn or brains to this beauty?”

"Some. By recent standards, not much - 208 slightly peaky horses out of a medium-strung all-alloy DOHC-2 2.8L V8. A high-quality 5-speed non-overdrive gearbox, fully synchronized with triple-cone synchros on 2 and 3. Those horses are tasked with pulling the second-lightest car here, at 1140kg, and they do so… adequately. Straight-line performance is right around average for the cars we’ve seen.

What’s not average is the footwork. This is a high-quality chassis, suspension hardware, tires, and brakes. The brakes are about flawlessly tuned, the suspension not so much; it’s something approaching balanced front to rear, but underdamped at both ends."

With a brief show of credentials, they crossed the rope and opened the side doors and hatch.

“I can certainly see why there aren’t four full seats, but I don’t see why the rear two are there at all. Even for children there isn’t much room. At least they fold flat, and the result is quite a practical space for cargo. Moving forward… oh my! This interior is among the best we’ve seen this whole week - stunning handwork, at a very high quality.”

"My mind was nearly made up even before I saw the inside. I can see this being a viable contender - it checks all the boxes, some of them quite hard, and appears to have no major flaws apart from the inherent one of seat count… oh, I do see a problem: with how the windows are arranged, visibility to the rear sides is atrocious. Still, not a dealbreaker.

I expect the price might be, though; all this quality can’t come cheap."

“Actually, this is well under budget - 36k”

“Huh. Well, then that’s very much worth a drive,” Magda concluded before turning to the attendant.

“When might we try this out?”

“Unfortunately, this is our only intact specimen. You heard about the F1 car, yes?”

“We did, yes. So… when?”

“At the latest, when the exhibition ends this weekend. We might be able to arrange an evening demonstration; I’ll need to check with a few people. Alternatively, there’s a Cascina dealer in Aachen. If you like, I can call and arrange a Dicentra for you there?”

“Aachen? A two-three hour drive each way… let’s call that Plan B. Meanwhile, could we see about an evening demo? Here’s my card in case that makes a difference.”

“Certainly. Check back here later this afternoon.”

Verdict: Worth a testdrive.


6. Zephorus Stelvio V8 by @Riley

“I get the feeling of approaching the epicenter of something, in more ways than one. I see more traces of damage from that misbegotten pinball of doom. And the cars are getting more and more exotic-looking. I can see why they tried to park it here of all places.”

“Oh, look at that - they’re bringing what looks like a replacement down the access hall from outside. And they’re doing it correctly - a team pushing it by hand. Quite a striking car! Let’s follow it until it’s in place.”

“Ok, I see where they’re going to park it. Right next to something too wrecked and burned for me to identify.”

“They’re hanging a new banner for the wreck to replace the burned one… the wreck is was an Edgewater, apparently. This one - oh, I see on its decklid: Zephorus.”

“Despite wearing the most subdued paint since the Seawolf, this is visually the loudest car I’ve seen all week. I can’t decide if I like it or not, but it makes an impression either way. Looks like they’ve just about parked it. Oh wow… look at how the door opens! Up! I’ve never seen anything like this.”

“Barring a few details, I think I do like its exterior. It’s very daring, audacious, and carries that torch with enough confidence to be commendable regardless of where it sets it down. Some proportions look a bit off - the doors and side windows - though it’s such a novel design that I can understand the design language hasn’t matured yet.”

“Speaking of windows, how do they open? You’ve got to be kidding me… I could hardly get my hand through that!”

“The split side windows are stylish in their own way, and eyeballing the geometry, it looks like the split could’ve been used to ease the lower/inner pane fitting inside the door, winding down like normal. For a race car trying to save every last gram, these little flap vents make sense, but for this? With this interior? What were they thinking?”

“Also, what is going on with that B-pillar? It’s strangely angled, and enormous for no apparent reason. With how limited the visibility is to begin with, it needs all the help it can get, not a pointless giant panel right next to your head.”

“Looking at the B-pillar further, its angles start to make sense. But its size doesn’t.”

“Is that a proprietary luggage set?”

They approached the attendants with their passes, which they seemed not to care about much. “Sorry we can’t give you much of a tour. We’ve got a lot of setup and cleaning still left. But if you have any questions, let us know.”

“Yes, it looks like a very nice leather suitcase designed to fit behind the seats… which appears to be general-purpose cargo area… and the only one? No frunk or trunklet?”

“Apparently not. Hm… engineering-wise, on a mid-engined car with inherently difficult packaging and emphasis on maximum performance and optimized weight distribution, the most prime real estate being occupied by luggage seems daft. It’s also quite a small space. On the other hand, access has been considered, and with how far forward this seat moves, it’s actually not bad. On a roadtrip, being able to reach your stuff without stopping is certainly a plus, though you won’t be carrying much of it to begin with.”

“This interior is very… fleshy. I guess the color works, while the shapes and layout - apart from the windows and cargo area - are quite nice. High quality and handmade, too.”

“The seats are more comfortable than the racing buckets they look like. The driver’s position is well thought-through, though rear visibility is… to be fair, not much worse than any other mid-engined car, except to the side blind spots. The giant pillars… why?!”

“What’s under the… uh… do we still call it a hood if it’s in the back?”

“A transverse all-alloy 3.3L DOHC-4 V8 making 279hp at 6900rpm. Redline is 7500, though the high-quality forged internals should be good for at least 8000. The internals have been lightened to cancel out the flywheel, which is minimally heavy, for a net zero balance weight. The nominal 12:1 compression ratio is very high, and normally would be pretty cheesy, but with hot cams like this has, the actual (dynamic) compression ratio decreases relative to the nominal (static) one to the point that this is roughly equivalent to 10.5:1 or so on a less high-strung engine. So no cheese there.”

"All in all, this is a rather remarkable engine. Despite further lightening available, it has by far the fastest response both on and off throttle, nearly 50% faster than the Walf in second place. It’s quite loud but decently smooth. Thermal efficiency is middling at 19.2%, but with cams like this that’s a respectable figure. Performance relative to service costs is mediocre, while relative to consumption it’s about exactly average. The body - alu paneling on stainless steel - is fairly light at 1183kg, so its performance should be strong…

…and it is! Top speed is a respectable 255, while 80-120 is very competitive at 2.85 seconds - properly quick! More good news is the brakes, which are the best of all cars and some of the strongest I’ve ever seen: flat zero fade,100-0 in 33.7 meters. And the suspension…

Double wishbone front and rear, reasonably well-tuned for right around where a GT should be: 1.48Hz front, and the rear slightly too low (or the front slightly too high) at 1.6. Roll angle of 3.0 is very good, also about where it should be. Grip is fierce - 1.14g at lower speed, dropping to 1.08 with gentle understeer. Combined with the interior, the Comfort rating (51.1 adjusted) is in the middle of a pack whose lowest-ranked member is still an upgrade over the already satisfactory incumbent. The 43.7 Sportiness rating, on the other hand, is in a whole other league than all but a couple of competitors."

“What do you think, Magda?”

“This is probably the most difficult car to decide about. I get that its dynamic performance, including comfort, are exceptional, but on top of starting with two-seater penalties, it also has exceptional problems - some inherent to mid-engined cars, others not. Still, why not? There’s no harm in looking further into it.”

She approached an attendant and asked about a testdrive. “I’m so sorry, if only you’d asked about an hour ago, it’d’ve been no problem. But this is our only example left. You’ll have to wait until the exhibition is over.”

“What about an evening arrangement?”

The attendant looked slightly peeved. “Did… you see the effort it took to bring this in here? To wheel it out by hand and then back in, when most staff have gone home for the day… I’m sorry, we can’t do that.”

She wondered about asking director Warsteiner to see if he could pull some strings to make that happen anyway; if Cascina could - maybe - do it, why can’t Zephorus? Then, she spotted a large display poster nearby that stopped her cold in her tracks.

Verdict: Worth a testdrive.


7. Edgewater Daytona C (@ldub0775 & @happyfireballman )

The Edgewater display area had meanwhile put up a large poster with a photograph of the car, the real one now a charred wreck that was about to be carted away on several dollies. Thinking fast, Magda ran up to the attendants, holding her pass.

“Do you have a replacement coming down the hall?”

"Er, yes, as we speak, in fact… " The attendant asked to see her pass. “Oh, Magda Schulz! I’ve read many of your writings, and must say, I’m a fan. I especially liked–”

“Please excuse me, this is possibly time-sensitive. I’m not just here in a professional capacity, I’m also looking for a car for myself. The last two I couldn’t arrange a timely testdrive because the surviving examples had to replace the damaged ones here. Before the replacement gets too far down the hall…”

“I understand. Wait a moment, please.” The attendant left to talk to a small crowd of important-looking people at the back of the display.

“Yes, you asked just in time, and we can offer a testdrive. However, it would have to be right now, and as it’s our only remaining example, one of our staff would have to accompany you. There are only two seats, so the rest of your party would have to wait. Is that ok?”

“Done.”


An hour later, as they’d arranged, Magda found Stefan and Ursula in the village of booths set up to be a temporary food court. Her eyes were wide, she was on the verge of shaking, with an expression as if she’d just had a near-death experience.

“My dear! Are you ok? You look like you just saw a battle.”

“I need a beer,” was all she managed, continuing her thousand-yard stare.

A Kölsch and a Doppelbock later, she blinked, seemingly for the first time since the drive, bringing her gaze back to immediate surroudings. Stefan, who’d been silently watching her, noticed this and asked, “I assume something awful happened on the drive. But had it been an accident or such… I know how you’d’ve reacted. So I assume it’s something profoundly terrifying about the car. To see you like this, though… my goodness, was it that bad?”

Magda slowly shook her head, eyes closed, then suddenly opened them, breaking into a smile he hadn’t seen since their wedding day.

“No… it was that good.”

(To be continued)

Verdict: Semifinals.


Non-semifinalist Rankings

1 Like

i think your version of the daytona is completely missing mods. if you want or need any photos of the car for future reviews, feel free to ask. i personally dont think it looks quite as nice in default automation red lol

also i think you forgot to ping me and @happyfireballman

That’s not default red. None of the colors came through correctly. Moved to DM.

I quote. Bolding mine.

The airflow slider has an inherent penalty on car reliability, and the car is above the recommended reliability value regardless. The number itself, based on your guidelines, I considered to be one of the arbitrary ones. I could easily have come to almost-identical results without using the slider.
Good reading, but would have preferred to drop out for some other reason.

I understand your reasoning, and when I first started participating in comps, I’d’ve employed it as well - namely, what the stats say is what goes, full stop.

However, in many cases we deem a stat to inadequately represent the consequences of engineering design. The essence of scrutineering is to open the hood and examine, from the perspective of reality, the engineering choices made and what their real effects would be, overriding the game calculators.

Airflow, reliability, and cooling are arbitrary numbers, but their comparisons are not. The reality is that providing half the cooling an engine needs would result in it overheating if driven hard enough. It’s not a linear relationship, but we can approximate and say that half the cooling is enough for half of full power for an indefinite time, or more than half for a limited time. For turbo engines, if anything you want more cooling than the engine immediately needs, to avoid heatsoak, not less.

One might call it cheese, as it artificially boosts a stat (or in this case artificially limits the penalty to one) in an unrealistic way, and it’s within the domain of what previous comps have deemed bin-worthy. My view is that binning is rather harsh, so I prefer to “model” (in writing) cheese in other ways. In most cases, we’ve literally got a smell of cheese that puts the character off from the car without it being an instant dealbreaker. In the Poseidon’s case, I chose to play it out for the sake of the storyline. The ranking would’ve been the same had I instead written about a block of Emmenthaler that melted all over the turbo, and in either case preferable - though more work on my part - to simply binning it.

“Fair play” means it’s legal from an OOC perspective - t.i. it won’t get binned or judged per se, as for example happened in JOC3B. Fair play doesn’t make it a good move.

That slider represents extra cooling. 0 is the bare minimum to keep the motor functioning, 100 suggests things like hood vents and strakes that actually work.

When “cooling capacity” is half of “required cooling”, it does not sound like extra. 100 is extra. 0 is perhaps a minimum to keep it functioning, but not indefinitely at full power.

Replies that aren’t relevant to the general public should be over DM. Replies that are, should be here.

It’s not what the stats say - it’s what the rules say. The challenge consists of the simulator and the edge conditions set out by the host. If an edge condition throws out part of the simulator, then it’s out?

It is strange to see a mechanic discredited as arbitrary and then declared a critical fault in retrospect. Especially considering what the in-game implementation of the slider does vs what it claims to do (the amount of radiators behind the grille should not significantly alter the aerodynamic properties of the car, unless the front bay is empty and there are suitable exits).

If one does not want a tool used, it would be prudent to not say the tool is free to be used. I can bet you the FIFA rules for soccer don’t say “kicking the ref in the groin is fair play”, whether or not it’s objectively a good idea.

Changing the airflow slider to 50 has negligible effects on stats (3 decimals worse on prestige, 2 decimals worse on sportiness. 5 decimals better on reliability). Since reliability is a judgeable parameter, it seemed like a calculated tradeoff, rather than cheese or a segue to a public execution.

The final rankings are your business as the host. I have no qualms about the Poseidon’s position. This has generally been an enjoyable challenge - don’t take my insistence on the rules being respected as damning criticism. I’ve said my peace. The toys remain firmly inside the pram.

4 Likes

The rules granted freedom to use the tools from an OOC perspective, not freedom from the IC consequences of their use. Moved to DM apart from a public request: I’d like to hear from anyone who read “fair game” as “altogether disregarded.”

I’ll comment publicly on this regardless.

Calculated and well-calculated are not the same things - and that elegant nuance makes all the difference in the world. You lost 5 points of reliability - and whereas reliability is counted lower than sportiness or prestige in the challenge’s supposed priorities, it is also closer-packed. I’d assume most entries in the competition are between 65 and 75 reliability - so by going from 69 to 64 points, you go from middle of the pack to the bottom on that stat.

That alone, of course, would not justify the host’s decision of scripting your car to break during the review and awarding it an F - and that latter decision is still too harsh, I would argue. However, the top priority of the entire challenge is to produce a car that is well-suited to spirited, unrestricted Autobahn driving. This obviously suggests closer scrutiny of decisions on cooling, noise, gearing - so on and so forth. There’s a real-life example of this: Opel entirely scrapped a proposed LS1-powered trim of the Omega B - a car which would have granted the brand much-needed premium/performance credibility if launched - simply because their production-ready prototype had insufficient cooling to sustain a full-throttle cruise.

I can understand being dismayed at a car you spent a bunch of time making being savaged in the reviews: again, I don’t think it’s F-worthy. However, you should expect that result - even if the rules aren’t explicit on the matter - if you play the game in a spreadsheet-like “stat go up = good” way and submit products of that mentality on this forum’s challenges. Surely you’ve heard of all the horror stories about cars “ruined by the bean-counters”; this is the same.

That all said and done, it’s good that you enjoyed the challenge. This forum is very much a “live and learn” kind of place, and the best way to get better is to enter more challenges and bolster your creative arsenal that way.

4 Likes

Decimals. I lost 0.5 points in reliability from the slider. The car has a lot of complex bits, so 70 reliability was never a goal. Being passed on for not touching the top rung of reliability is quite different from being blown up on camera.

This argument was never about sufficient cooling. I am fully in favour of sufficient cooling.
The argument was about certain parts of the simulation being thrown out of the door in the rules as stated (turbo tuning very explicitly, engine airflow I thought also rather explicitly) and then rising from the grave later on.

I lived and learned this game mostly in the previous decade. I’m OK as far as understanding the mechanicals, thank you. Understanding the hosts I seem to be getting worse at, because the way the rules are written vs the way they are interpreted later is becoming rather more… arbitrary…

F was too harsh overall, I agree. It also didn’t apply to the car’s final ranking, which you’ll note is far from last.

The dispute appears to be the degree of (un)clarity regarding the rule allowing full slider range, as far as legality is concerned. I’ve yet to be shown where I erred there, but open to it.

My bad, guess my skimming abilities are far from infallible. And I’d agree there, though unlike most instances of competitor cars blowing up on this forum, yours still placed well.

Never said you were not in favor of sufficient cooling. I think the following passage from the OP is crucial:

And it applies even more considering you said you never did lose much reliability in reducing cooling. I did a test with my car, which has 55 cooling: If I reduce that to zero, the top speed - which is not a part of the stats sidebar but is still likely a factor in moroza’s judging - suddenly increases by 6 mph. I’d assume your car similarly gains 4-7 mph as a result of the cooling dump - and a huge one that is, indeed, implausible. I’d bet money on the outcome being different if you’d lowered cooling to, say, 30.

And both the game and the hosts have changed pretty significantly since the past decade; hell, even since the last update. I remember a challenge (Cool Wall 3) just last year where the reliability values of the cars submitted topped out at 65, and both myself and the eventual winner of that challenge ended up with sub-50 values. Now we have techpool; and with that little caveat, suddenly even somewhat premium cars can get 80, and luxury ones can breach 70 without compromising much; 50 reliability would have a car canned without question.
As for the hosts, I think we as a community have just had a very sharp swerve away from accepting metagaming and loophole use as fair play. Your example isn’t an egregious one and it likely didn’t net you much of a raw-score advantage, but you still saw a rule which said you’re free to adjust airflow, and figured the way to go was to set it to stone dead zero.

2 Likes

I’ven’t been here a fraction as long as either of you, and this is my first experience as host/judge. Only recently have I learned of major shifts in the culture surrounding competition judging. My very first entry (QFC23) was - I only realized long after the fact - a minmax-fest of cheese, perhaps to half of the degree it was accused of. I gamed the stats and was upset that that didn’t fly as well as I thought it should’ve. Since then I’ve come to adopt different views regarding realism and scrutineering, which involve deeper analysis of engineering choices than what the stat says. Analysis that I am, as should be evident by the length of wind in my reviews, more than happy to do.

At one extreme, there’s disregard for the stats and looking only at engineering (and notes; Howler’s submission included a bit about trick door hinges which I not only included in the review, but factored into final ranking). At the other extreme, we could just look at demographic desirability as the game calculates it. We’re somewhere in the middle, and it still feels a bit like being tossed between two horns.

All of which strums yet again that harp I picked up in CSR154: however we play this is less important than utmost clarity about same, especially for newcomers and those returning after a hiatus.

3 Likes

I still think Moroza can learn something here, but I have to step in a bit for him:
When LS lets a car burn in bin hell and tells you in harsh words that this is crap, also for having cheesy absurd engineering choices, that´s funny for almost everyone.
So why is this a big deal when Moroza added a car breakdown for his storytelling, as long as the car isnt overly trashed in the final stats (which it does not seem to be, since it was right behind the Authié et Dallier that seemed like a rather ok one)?

I understand that one wants to question criticism to a car that was done with patience and effort, but I don´t think Moroza went way too far here. In fact, the learning curve since the first effort to provide us a setting is quite good.

9 Likes

Round 4: Semifinals


Edgewater Daytona C part 2

by @ldub0775 and @happyfireballman

September 17, 1977, early afternoon, Internationale Automobil-Ausstellung [exhibition] No.47, Frankfurt am Main, Bundesrepublik Deutschland.

“‘That good’? Well, it looks like a high-end exotic, with matching stratospheric performance and price tag - both up front and ongoing. From what I’ve gathered, such cars are useless for anything but showing off, tedious to drive, and miserable to own and live with. I’m glad you had fun all the same… though from your expression, that’s a bit of an understatement… but how is that we’ve gone from sensible sedans to… this?”

"I still remember how it felt to first own a car, the Kaffee, and the paradigm-shifting sense of freedom it gave. I remember quite clearly when we got the Lancier, opening up a whole other realm of driving. The cars we’ve encountered the last few days have been an order of magnitude above that. But this… this is something else.

The looks are breathtaking and the performance enough to induce cardiac arrest… but physical effects aside, it’s what the car adds up to mentally that makes it so powerful.

The first impression it gave, just looking at it… was intimidating. It looks like serious business, and a casual glance at the specs certainly reinforces that. But when the drive began, the ease of operating it, the refinement, the docility, the drivability (51.5, tied with the Cerberus for the median score)… was unnerving. The prospect of four hundred nine horsepower in something weighing barely over one ton… is scary. Discovering that this fearsome power is for me to control, and actually controllable, usable… was terrifying. But the fact that this deity of a car has its mundane, mere mortal side present, accounted-for, and sorted out to the point of being a legitimate daily driver… it takes my entire automotive worldview and stands it on its head. It’s shattering."

“So it wasn’t just any one thing, but that it all works together?”

“Exactly. And I should point out that many of those ‘one things’, taken alone, rank at the very top as well. Considering the whole picture, many of the parts are the best there are, and the whole is even greater than their sum.”

Ursula had taken the time Magda was out driving to study the spec sheet. "The numbers back that up. It ranks first in almost all straight-line metrics, sportiness (and by a lot; 52.7, followed by the Zephorus at 43.7), sum of sportiness and comfort, grip at all speeds, braking distance, and power to weight. It’s second behind the Cerberus on outright power, behind the KHI Stellia on performance per consumption, and third behind the Cerberus and Swanson on performance per service costs.

That last figure is quite remarkable considering it has by far the highest service costs here - 2409.60, followed by the Zephorus’ 1827.00 and then the Howler’s 1518.10. This is definitely an exotic layout - a transverse mid-rear mounting for the M4300i-12, which is a beautifully designed gem of an engine, but not one for beginners. High-tech - all-alloy DOHC-4, all forged internals, twin manifold port injection - high-quality, high-performance yet highly refined, and high-maintenance.

We’ve seen some weird international engine and engineering mysteries: American cars from Italy and Germany, French from Australia… and now this. Though Edgewater appears to be American, this is a poster child of a German car, especially the engine: complicated, expensive, a complete pain in the ass to work on, and very fussy about being maintained just so… but maintained properly, it’s actually above-average reliable (9th/19), while breaking performance records and still being somewhat reasonable to use for errands.

At the same time as the Daytona is so effective at getting itself somewhere, it doesn’t forget about what it’s transporting. For a supercar with a screaming V12 right behind you, it’s surprisingly quiet - 35.1 adjusted, tied with the Authie et Dallier, a touch louder than your Lancier (34), and quieter than the Novalina with its paleolithic powertrain (37.9) or the Planar with its inappropriate intake (42.1). Smoothness is an unsurprising 83.3. Overall comfort is near the bottom of the pack, but still higher than your Lancier…"

“…Which is satisfactory; as I understood at the beginning, even a downgrade could be ok if compensated elsewhere. Which it does in spades.”

“Passengers aside, the drawings detailed a frunk that is relatively huge for a supercar, rivaling a mid-sized sedan and no less convenient. Magda, can you confirm?”

“Yes, before I even drove it, that was probably the first feature I noticed that told me this wasn’t just a useless toy or ornament. It’s not very deep, but enough for a single layer of full suitcases, which it’s long and wide enough to fit several of. It’s not optimized for routine ass & trash missions, and we won’t be picking up large household appliances like we’ve done in the Lancier, but it should have no trouble getting groceries. Very very quickly.”

"And it’d be reasonable to use, as far as economy - 13.4L (17.6mpgUS) combined, 11.2L (20.9) at 110 (65). The highway figure is the median of all the cars here. The combined one slightly above average, 8th out of 19. Thermal efficiency at 18.12% is mediocre as such, but for a V12 spinning to 8300 and cammed for it… it’s some kind of feat.

The totality of these rankings represents quite accurately what you describe as a deity with its mortal side intact. The design spearheads with its inherent strengths extremely well, but doesn’t neglect its flanks."

Magda sipped the last bit of her Doppelbock, stood up, and simply stared for a moment, before pronouncing, "Some dishes rely on the quality of ingredients; others, on the skill of the cook. Some are tastier, some more filling, some healthier. Some are several of these at once. Uncommonly, most of the above. But rare is the one that is all of the above, and well-presented at that.

Actually, the presentation of this dish alone is almost worth signing up for; as design goes, I declare the Daytona no less than a masterpiece."

She hiccuped with some force. "The beer has, ironically, sobered me up regarding the experience I just had, and I feel more at ease naming its flaws as well. The worst is probably the rear side visibility. Though it’s a bit better than the Cascina and Zephorus, and the mirrors are amply sized, well-placed, and aspherical on both sides, it still takes more concentration to check blind spots, so in some situations driving it might be a bit tedious.

Then there’s the ground clearance. They had the sense to make the fiberglass lower body panels easily replaceable, as the staff showed me, but the very need for this says it all. Our country has mostly excellent roads, so this isn’t a hindrance to everyday use, but trips to that chalet we’ve rented a few times… are going to need something else."

And then… öm… that unnerving feeling returns, as I realize that’s really about it. It’s not just a supercar; it’s a good car too."

Ursula read from the stats. “It does have the second lowest safety score of anything here - 42.9, ahead of the KHI Stellia but somewhat short of the median 49.4.”

“Not great, but hardly a deathtrap. And of course, there’s the bleeding obvious - two seats. Trips with Stefan’s parents would be in the Hörch, which I mind but they don’t. But you know what? Those questions I ask of a coupe - ‘are you so amazing to drive and/or to look at that I’d be willing not to drive you sometimes? Are you so high quality that it makes up for reduced quantity of how often I can enjoy you?’… get an honest Yes.”

“Surely you’re not so impulsive as to have already made the decision to drop 44200 on the fulfillment of Anke’s teasing - a firebreathing Midlifecrisismobile?”

“The Daytona isn’t the cure for a crisis, dear, it started one. No, I’ve not decided what to get. But I have decided what not to get; there is only one other car that, while quite different, is a worthy opponent for the Daytona. As for the rest…”


Design concept: A+
Design execution: M is for Masterpiece.
Engineering concept: A
Engineering execution: A-. Minor brake fade and suspension imbalance, a stat point or two left on the finetuning table, neither of which put much of a dent in the superlative result.

Verdict: Finals.


Cerberus 7.3 V12

7th of 19: Cerberus 7.3 V12 by @xsneakyxsimx

“As a concept, of all the choices, this one nails a perfect bullseye for what I had in mind - a big, imposing, comfortable rocket barge. It looks the part and delivers just as more than advertised. Visual design isn’t the strongest, and sportiness takes a bigger hit than I’d’ve liked, though its biggest downside is the smell of cheese with every full throttle opening.”

“Cheese aside, there’s some properly solid engineering in places (engine and footwork overall), while others fall a bit short (small wheels, ridiculous flywheel). Nevertheless, its first-place rankings in power (by a lot; 501hp, followed by the Daytona with 409) and top speed (also by a lot; 327kph, followed by the Swanson with 300) earn it the title of Most Insane Highway Bomber.”

“Their marketing slogan was something like ‘let loose the dogs of war’, but I’d suggest a certain German phrase instead. On ships, forward speed is traditionally at five levels: in English, ‘ahead slow’, ‘ahead one third’, ‘ahead standard’, ‘ahead full’, and ‘ahead flank.’ The German equivalent of the last one, at least as used on some submarines, is ‘Wahnsinnige Fahrt voraus’, literally translating as ‘Insane speed ahead.’ I think it fits perfectly.”


Primus Imperator 520GTS-ie

6th of 19: Primus Imperator 520GTS-ie by @Happyhungryhippo

“Visually excellent inside and out, and realistic. A competent, strong value proposition, let down by very low sportiness (7.3 vs. the incumbent’s 29.3), mixed engineering quality, and simply being outperformed even for the price.”

“A Sport version would be quite formidable. I’ll have my staff get in touch with their headquarters, see if they’d like Norðwagen’s engineers to consult with or outsource that to.”

“Between this and the next one was little more than a coin toss, as they’re very different cars performing the same mission. The Primus is by far the more livable, but the Zerphorus is that much better to drive yet still comfortable. I really had to think long and hard about how to weigh its downsides, and there’s certainly room for reasonable disagreement with the conclusion.”


Zephorus Stelvio V8

5th of 19: Zephorus Stelvio V8 by @Riley

"As dynamic qualities go, it’s second only to the Daytona, in some cases exceeding it - overall braking, responsiveness, and comfort… if you ignore the windows. It also trumps the Edgewater in Prestige, environmental resistance, and safety.

I’m impressed that both supercars here are so well-balanced as machines go. Both improve on the Lancier’s comfort while demolishing nearly everyone else for sportiness. Both are super cars. But the Daytona is more so, and has fewer less-than-super details; I can’t ignore those windows or that B-pillar."


Waldersee Kurfürst GL70

4th of 19: Waldersee Kurfürst GL70 by @Texaslav

“I suspect that the parent company’s meddling is holding Waldersee back. The engineering skill is plain to see, but the coprolite the Amis give them to work with can only be polished so much. I’d really like to see what they can do with a proper, modern powertrain. It’s let down mostly by low sportiness (15.9), also by a thirsty and not especially smooth engine. Even so, the Kurfürst is a true Prince of the Autobahn.”


Cascina Dicentra

3rd of 19: Cascina Dicentra by @Tsundere-kun

“A left-field contender as charming and eyepleasing as it is well-rounded and an excellent value. Third in sportiness among non-cheese cars (fourth if you include the Walf), practical, and did I mention how lovely it is to look at, both outside and - more importantly for its occupants - inside? Despite suboptimal damper settings, it’s brilliant to drive, probably the best car here for more relaxed weekend cruising. Its Autobahn credentials are there too, just outperformed.”


Swanson 555 SL

by @Ludvig

To the finals…

6 Likes

We had a good run - and with good writing! Congrats to the finalists.

2 Likes

Sadly, this is already the sport version of the Imperator. But it was never meant to compete with super cars, the model year is 1967 and in 78, it was already rolling into the well-earned retirement.
That the oldtimer in this challenge managed to get into the semifinals and almost fought down a Zephorus is more than I expected.

3 Likes