Yay glad you enjoyed the Lattice 
there are a car that is slower than the minivan, you already know what it is
stop spoiling the fun silly
everyone already know that before i do that
THE PENULTIMATE ROUND
car go vroom for long time no die set time good
Videos are linked in the spreadsheet as always. Here’s a description of how each car from this round drove:
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@Danicoptero - As to be expected from a Cater- uhh Superlite, it is indeed lightweight and has superb handling and acceleration, but it slightly loses out on top speed. -
@T0M - PURE INSANITY. There is no area where this suffers at all; it has absurd acceleration, grip, top speed and brakes. It was obvious it would dominate the challenge from the very beginning. But admittedly, it was pretty hard to drive. -
@HelloHi - And now, the exact opposite of the previous car. The name of this car is so ironic, since it’s so depressing and forgettable with a 4 speed and open diff, and it barely reaches the minimum top speed requirement. It feels like a Group 1 reject. -
@conan - It has insane acceleration from almost. It is really front heavy and has a lot of drag, so it tops out lower than some cars with less than half the power. -
@T0M - The same car but made to set the highest speed in this challenge, at a whopping 256 mph. No car will ever go this fast for sure, but it took a lot of sacrifices to get there, including worse brakes, one less gear, and even an open diff. So to no surprise, it’s handling suffers. Perhaps it could have used more power as well? -
@AndiD - Yes, almost the entire competition has now been shafted by a front wheel drive car with a 3 cylinder. That must be pretty embarrassing. It has quite a lot of wheelspin off the line, but it is well worth it once it gets under control. The acceleration and grip are absolutely mental, and it hauls ass all the way up to 228 mph, even with just a little over 400 hp. -
@pcmoreno - Feels like an old touring car; fun to drive, but quite slidey and I can really feel it’s weight. It also has occasional understeer. -
@ScintillaBeam - Surprise! There is another car slower than the minivan this time! This giant metal pipe tries too hard to be a plane; it barely feels connected to the road. It is also absurdly heavy with that colossal meme V16 and bicycle tires, so it’s fucking awful in every corner. The only positive is it’s alright acceleration, but then it’s held back so much from the gearing being so short, most likely because it redlines at just 3500 rpm. -
@Djadania - The car you’ve all been waiting for! Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-daa, Da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-daa- alright, it is horrible in every single way, especially acceleration because of the most fucked up gearing possible, with 1st going up to 150 god damn miles per hour. The only redeeming quality is when it gets onto the highway, where it SOMEHOW reaches 191. Slowing down from that is horrifying, as the brakes get immediately cooked. One must imagine the deals being better. -
@conan - Even with semi slicks, this handles like garbage; it’s very unresponsive. Also, the brakes are ineffective, even under full force. At least it goes up to 220 mph, but I have to brake really early if I want to live to tell the tale
13 Likes
vrrrrm
1 Like
i love how my car (modena hines 500r), which was meant to be a factory-modified street car, with a ladder frame and a solid axle rear and not that much stuff done to it, even managed to be in the upper half of the leaderboard
i tried to replicate the general motors firebird xp-21, so blame that car for so fucking oversteery
finally, the minivan’s reign of complete mediocrity yearning for more has ended
THE PAIN IS FINALLY OVER
THE DAY HAS FINALLY COME, IT’S CRAZY TO THINK THAT IT’S HERE
Crazy? I was crazy once.
They trapped me in BeamNG.
BeamNG with 69 cars to drive endlessly.
And 69 cars made me crazy.
look at spreadshet
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@happyfireballman - hurr durrrrr we at rhania refuse to make a good car that gives any positive emotions and it must suck complete ass at everything -
@KenShiro - WAIT HOW THE FUCK DID THIS DOMINATE EVERY CAR BY MORE THAN A MINUTE AREN’T THESE CARS SUPPOSED TO SUCK -
@pcmoreno - oh boy i sure do love having to hypermill this just below it’s point of usable power and deal with the shittiest brakes imaginable just to finish the race -
@Golisopog - oi m8, i jus’ swapped this big ol v8 into the little shed project, wait what do you mean wheelspin? of course the wheels spin! it’d be impossible to move it they dinnit, innit bruv? Wilfred spun out and died just 5 minutes later in a brutal car crash. - dilldozer @ImKaeR - this really made a reasonable man want to do unreasonable things
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@AMuteCrypt - AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA -
@HelloHi - clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone clone -
@KenShiro - blud done really thoughted the drag car could the turns fast grip speed high good drive 
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@Microwave_of_Doom - 50% throttle in 3rd 50% throttle in 3rd 50% throttle in 3rd 50% throttle in 3rd wheelspin wheelspin wheelspin wheelspin
THE END
Well, that’s it. I have now been tortured by every single car. I’m not sure if I will ever be able to host a challenge on such a massive scale like this ever again, but it was real fun while it lasted. Every car was definetly unique in it’s own way (although every reason wasn’t a good one), and it was nice to see the all the different approaches in each build.
Thanks to everyone who submitted; yes, even the ones who submitted the god awful meme builds. I never thought I would get anywhere near the amount of interest this actually got. See you in the next one. This has truly been some of the Powerful American Insanity National (2023) of all time.
jk i have nothing planned yet lmfao xdddddd
Top 10:
- @KenShiro - i swear this is legal officer '00 - 27:37.705
- @T0M - At Leviathan RS '21 - 28:50.464
- @AndiD - Mara-AMM PAINagon 4.6 ST Final '20 - 29:18.461
- @AndiD - Mara Xenia 1.2 Ultra Tarmac Spec B '20 - 29:21.266
- Ctesiphon - Anzio 32R '89 - 29:31.394
- @T0M - AT Leviathan High Velocity '21 - 29:34.064
- @SheikhMansour - Hulme Centrifuge Prototype - 29:43.431
- Extrodius - Phenom Zute GT '00 - 29:43.658
- @moroza - Nordwagen Slayer R8 '82 - 29:53.803
- Nocturne - Helious Four BSR '20 - 29:55.232
20 Likes
C’mon, ya prude, where’s the Dildozer?
4 Likes
I won! Thank you so much for all the support guys, this is truly a momentous occasion. I got the highest number on the finished cars (68), so this must mean i won!
Troll complete. Return to HQ.
4 Likes
This reminded me of C&D Lightening Lap in a way. Dope.
hey 40th isnt that bad
especially when you submit something that handles like an aircraft carrier
Hey, 42 and 45 isn’t too bad with literally two cars I already had laying around.
1 Like
God damn got myself beaten to a plup by a car thats ONE WHOLE MINUTE faster than the rest 
man good challenge can’t believe you actually made it through all 69 cars and finished the challenge lmao
A while back I said to myself “how hard can driving the painful one be”. Then it got DNF’d by LS_swapped.
They say in flight school that you must never give up. I don’t know why I’m saying this because I’ve not been to flight school and forum posts aren’t books, but: https://youtu.be/F2Yk1VuSkZM
like holy shit @AMuteCrypt how the fuck did you make something this painful
(well i suppose The Painful One is descriptive of what it is, so…)
This car is torture. Unlike most torturous activities which are fun to some people, the master here does not go one by one. No, this thing tries to fuck you in multiple ways. Vertically, horizontally and diagonally. And more!
Let’s start with Vertically, which is by far the worst. The jelly ass ‘suspension’ makes it impossible to drive faster than ~110mph, as when it meets any elevation change the suspension amplifies the bump steer (I think that’s what it’s called) and it immediately tries to rocket to one side, which immediately makes it rocket to the other side if corrected (because if you don’t, it’ll just continue turning until it flips from the sideways force). Repeat this again and again due to the near lack of dampening, and it makes for a vehicle which is plain uncontrollable at speed.
Horizontally! The center of gravity of this thing is in the ionosphere. Combine this with insane ride height and F1 grade tires and springs softer than a pillow after a day’s hard work, it makes for insane body roll. I’m fairly sure it has stiff roll bars as well, to make it even more painful as it can’t fully roll and instead flips around 12-15 degrees of roll. However! This one is at least PREDICTABLE unlike the aforementioned dimension.
Diagonally. This thing has a torque curve cliff that looks like this.
You may say: That’s easy! Just stay below 4000RPM, silly.
No
Well, in all fairness, that is how you are supposed to do it. If it weren’t for the GOD DAMNED TRANSMISSION
No, fighting the suspension wasn’t enough. You have to fight the engine and transmission as well. I don’t know what the fuck this is, but it does not allow you to throttle on while shifting, and it has a massive delay in commanding the shift and it actually going in to the next gear, along with a very messy crawl it makes me think it’s some miserable automated manual transmission. Shift delay isn’t that bad, but god damn does it refuse to let you in the gear that you want because the speed is too low. Let’s play out a normal situation:
I want to go in to 4th gear. Except, I’m going slightly too slow. It shifts back to 3rd. But in that time it took to shift to that gear, the insane rolling resistance of the tires have made that too slow as well. It immediately throws it in to first, which is basically undrivable, but still allows a deadly speed of 31 MPH. You crash and die because it refuses to let you shift up again and you can’t apply 5% throttle because even that is too much.
To make it to the finish required about 31 attempts totalling a time of about 7 hours. Most deaths are to be attributed to the stupid suspension, as was probably the intention.
Because I lost a wheel on this run, I’m sure a sub-60 minute run is possible. Whether I’ll be the one to do it? No. Please no.
14 Likes
you are the biggest masochist i have ever seen
i salute you 
edit: just realized you lost a wheel less than halfway through the run, i legit feel so bad for you 
7 Likes
It…arguably drove better with three wheels than four. Though that is possibly because I was forced to drive it at pedestrian speeds.
4 Likes