The Kinda Grand Tour [FINALE]

Community Challenges & Competitions
103

#Team ‘Southend or Bust’
Original Post - Previous Post

“What a nice man that Kai was!” said Seb, still excited at the fact he was in the mere radius of the man.
“I think someone has a crush on someone” said James, mockingly.
“Don’t get jealous James, at least he’d go for me” snapped Seb.
Martin burst out laughing. “Alright, enough man crushing. Seb, I’m very happy you managed to meet your idol”
“Thanks Martin” Seb replied, sending a sarcastic glance to James. “And thank you for coming over before I fangirled too hard”
The other two chuckled. “The car, though” said Seb, “that’s quite something”.
“Told you” said Martin. “I really wonder if they’ll make it”.
“It’s a Toyota. It’ll still be going 100 years from now” replied James.
“Ooh, drivers meeting in 5 minutes. Let’s go” said Seb, and they saddled up for the journey ahead.

.

The boys got off to a good start in the Merna, the only nuance being James’s exclamation that they were on a “ROADTRIP!!” every 5 minutes.
“You’ve been wanting to do this all your life, haven’t you?”
“Yes, Martin, YES I HAVE”.
This part of the world was particularly pretty. The Rockies on one side, Olympic National Park in the distance and sea and islands in the middle. Surely no Erin Merna had been here before?

.

Arriving at the ferry, the boys parked up and got out of the car. “I wonder if the ferry people have any idea what’s going on?” asked Seb, surveying the array of battered cars that filled the holding bay of the boat.
“Nope, but I guess that’s part of the fun isn’t it” replied Martin. Martin’s vision caught something.
“Hey, look, a minivan!” he said suddenly.
“What that DMV Nebula?” said Seb. “My uncle had one of those for a while. Dunno what happened to it”. Seb’s thoughts turned to one night back in 2005 when his parents had been up on the phone until 3 am and had kept telling him to go back to sleep. He’d never asked what exactly happened, but he never saw the van afterwards.
“Any idea where James is?” asked Martin, snapping Seb out of his trance.
“Huh? Oh I think we went up front to look at some of the cars”.

Indeed James had. He’d spotted the Ardent Chancellor of Team Greasy Lightning and was making a b-line for it…

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Team Bamford

The red monster was noisily chuffing it’s way towards the Deception Pass Bridge, the elderly Ken holding station at the tattered imitation wood wheel while his three companions talked endlessly.

Ken listened with interest, the boys had gone from a stupid conversation about “memes” and were eagerly discussing the other people they’d seen around, the Erin car and that guy who looked like a Horse.

He smiled, Ken himself had never really paid attention to the world of cars around him, Bamford was done with LeMans by the time Erin started it’s LMP1 team and Gryphon Gear was a strange company run by degenerates to him and here was his own flesh and blood eagerly swapping 0-100 times like crazy…

Aside from a brief incident where Phil dropped his phone and had a mad scramble to save it when he was supposed to be taking a picture of the bridge, the trip went smoothly, fuel consumption was a worry and the gear changes were a damn sight clunkier then when they were in England, but a nice day and some friendly faces had put the worries of the team at ease and they made the ferry with time to spare.

From there, Ken slept in the one clean seat in the car while the boys went racing around to meet all the other teams, figuring that not only would they make friends, but possibly someone who might stop and help them once the Advance broke down…

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Team DMV Speed Stars

Exposition/Prologue

Day 1

Felix and Ethan are fiddling with the clutch.

Ethan: Alright, try it now.

Dennis tries to shift the van, but messes up due to the clutch.

Felix: I told you it wasn’t me messing up.

Dennis: Then that means I win.

Felix: Only if you admit that my driving is fine.

Dennis: Your driving could be worse.

Felix: sighs

He hands Dennis the $50.

Ethan: So if we’re actually doing this, what are we gonna need besides gas and food?

Dennis: Probably something to keep ourselves preoccupied for the drive.

Felix: Perhaps get some outlets to run our phones off of. The radio still works, so we don’t need to bring any speakers. We can just buy one of those cheap adapters.

Ethan: Just nothing too crazy. Extra weight will compromise both performance and fuel economy.

Felix: I’m just gonna get some basic parts. Maybe check craigslist periodically just in case we need a parts car.

Dennis: Just don’t go Speed Racer on us.

Felix: No promises.

Dennis: Figures. You’re used to bad clutches.

Dennis nudges to Felix’s car, a modified Volkswagen CC R-Line

Felix: My performance clutch isn’t bad once you get used to it. Still beats your torque converter.

Dennis: You’ll say that right up until it dies. As in, another 5 minutes.

Ethan: For the record, my car requires the least maintenance out of all of ours. But we should grab our food for the road.

They load up the van with just enough food and water for the trip, plus an extra day’s worth. Just in case. They also pack an inverter, sleeping bags, Felix’s Toolkit, and a fire extinguisher.

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<< This way to the previous post
Day -7
Nomade
“I think we’ve got most of the car sorted out and it has everything it needs to run. Time for a go?” I asked Ram.
“waaaaaaaaaaaaait!” came the reply as things crashed around and Ram came sprinting from around the corner. “Let’s do this!” he grinned. I strode around to the driver’s side door and reached for the handle as Ram did the same on the other side, sliding into the low slung seat. “mmmm” I hummed in assent as the seat fit me snugly.
“So good. Oh, yeah, here are the keys.” Ram extended his hand. With the key slotted in, the time had come. One cough. A little more rattling. The starter motor kept on whirring. For a split second I could’ve sworn the entire thing seized up but with a load roar and a lot of backfiring the engine came to life. Ram was laughing but I couldn’t hear anything because the exhaust, well, didn’t exist really.

Ram
*high five*
This was awesome. An orange midengined Brazilian sports car with the engine from a Honda van. What a car this was shaping up to be.
“Leave it running for a few minutes, Nomade. Give it a few pumps of the brake and clutch… oh yeah, turn the steering from lock to lock, we need to make sure it isn’t leaking any fluids!” I tried to shout over the six cylinder rumble. Nomade gave me a thumbs up so I left to go get the vacuum cleaner, that inside definitely needed a bit of love.

Day -5
Nomade
I headed down to the local garage to pinch some steel pipe to setup a rudimentary exhaust system. It had twin exhausts and we had all the catalytic converters and the mufflers, just not all the bits in the middle. The car was very nearly ready to go.

Day -1
Nomade
Loooooooong trip from Europe. “Hell, I hate these airplanes! We should stay on the ground!” I complained feeling my head spin, while Ram laughed at my shitty condition. It would be a day’s wait as we got the car with us, but my body wasn’t feeling ready even the next morning. Ram had gotten up early as usual for his jog and went on to get the car, but me… jetlagged, dehydrated, tired and hungry, I wasn’t ready to move anywhere anytime soon. I asked to Ram to take the wheel and crashed in the passenger’s seat to cure my sickness. “Wake me up when we get there, ok?”, I asked, my eyes already closed. “Sure”, he replied, putting his sunglasses on. “It’s going to be a bit of a drive, you can just take it easy.”

Day 0
Ram
I tapped Nomade on the shoulder lightly. “Hey, man, we’re here.”
“Many people?” Ram asked, looking around. “Yeah…”. I replied, deciding to do a quick check up of the car, it seemed like it drove well until here, but it is a used sports car, so anything can happen.

Nomade
While checking the engine fluids I noticed an orange hatchback close to us, “Hey, looks like we aren’t the only clockwork orange here, this is an Erin, right?”
“Merna, yep. These things are light as hell, probably around 300kg lighter than us, luckily we found us a good engine to make things even”. Ram said.
“Well the good news is that the car’s made it here in one piece, pretty much identical to how it left our garage so it’s looking sunny.”
Ram was rummaging in his bag. “What’re you looking for?” I asked.
“You brought a wireless speaker or anything?” he continued searching.
Reaching into my bag I dug out the speaker. “Here.” I lobbed it to him.
Ram went silent for a few minutes tapping around on his phone. Reaching down to the cable he plugged it in and the first few notes rang out.


I looked at him in surprise. “How did you know I liked Bonamassa?” I asked with a smile spreading on my face.
“We’re not strangers, Nomade” he replied with a chuckle, putting the speaker down.

Later that day
Nomade
After finishing the check up we went to check the other teams that were there. We found a lot of different approaches, there were some classics, grandpa’s sedan, teenager hot-hatches and kidnappers vans. “Looks like we’re the only ones running mid-engined here, huh? Do you recognize any faces?” I asked.
“Oh yeah. For sure. Uh, there’s Luke again, the boys from Southend or Bust…” he chuckled, “well, I say boys but it’s likely I’m the youngest here again. Mountain Pass is over there, oh, look, the Wookie oddball and his friend. Quite a few new faces here, still.”

At the start line
Nomade
“Seeing as you haven’t driven it yet but did the most work in the wrenching bit, it would only be fair to let you take the wheel to start off the race.” Ram said handing over the keys. Turning the key, the engine came to life without a hiccup this time. Tap. Tap the throttle. Watch the revs rise. The delicious 6 cylinder warble echoing. As the flag dropped I didn’t hesitate to floor the pedal, the rear tyres scrabbling for grip for a few seconds. Easing off the throttle, I joined Ram in a hearty laugh.

Ram
Whizzing through the scenery as the midday sun blazed down between patchy clouds from the Californian azure, we pressed on, the wind running through our hair, blasting Hendrix, eager to not miss the ferry. “Settle down there, Nomade, we don’t want to be killing anyone just yet!” I joked. We were one of the last ones to leave the camp so of course we ended up near the back of the boat. “Come on, get out of the car, let’s go mingle!” I laughed.

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team 1'); drop table participants; --

[Introduction](http://discourse.automationgame.com/t/the-kinda-grand-tour-friday-noon-2p/20895/62?u=franknstein)

Day 0

Frank is packing a camping grill, a bag of charcoal and a cooling box with different foods and two sixpacks of beer into the car

Da Wei: Damn, what are you doing there? We don’t have space for all that stuff!
Frank: Chill. We do. And I want some good barbecue when we made it through day one.
Da Wei: Forget about it. We’ll have enough opportunities to buy food on the way. No unnecessary crap in the car. Begins unloading Frank’s stuff.
Frank: FFS STOP IT! Grabs his grill out of Da Wei’s hands and puts it back into the trunk.
Da Wei: eyerolls Good. I’ll load all the necessary equipment into the car and if you find enough space then, we’ll take the grill with us.

Obviously, the car ended up pretty cramped even without the bbq equipment. Frank could barely fit the cooling box into the car, which now contained the beer and some snacks they could eat on the way. Some bottles of water were stored in the car as well. Frank also got his laptop with him, it has mobile internet and battery for a couple hours.
Da Wei, who volunteered to do the equipment planning (knowing Frank can be pretty chaotic) took care of the tents, sleeping bags and a seemingly endless amount of tools and spare parts.

Day 1 / Stage 1

The naturally aspirated inline-6 roared up as Frank accelerated out of the last corner of the road going along the seaside, leading to the ferry docks. The Scela took the road at a good pace, only slowing down for Da Wei to film out the passenger window at Deception Pass.

Da Wei: There’s our ferry. Seems like we’ve made it.
Frank: Yea. Not too slow as well. Can’t see any of the other teams so far.

They gave each other a high five as the car came to a stop at the docks. The Scela was in fact the first car to be loaded onto the ferry.
Two bottles of beer were opened, enjoying the view from the upper deck at the sea and the arriving cars.

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The Team Of Teenage Hopes And Dreams

So, the story of this car starts in 1965. Two 16 year-old twins watch a rally come through their village, and decide that this is what they want to do with their lives. So they try and build a rally car. It’s tiny, made of a hodge-podge of parts they found, and was made by two 16 year-olds who, although smart and doing well with metalworking in school, no practical experience.

However, it works. The car runs, and they potter round in it for a bit. It eventually got shelved until they could actually enter a rally, and to do that they needed to finish school. So, 2 years later, they finished school. By this point they wanted to start a company building cars, and abandoned any plans of using the original car.

50 years and a successful sports car company later, the two twins, now 68, heard of the Kinda Grand Tour, and decided to do the rally. However, the $500 restriction was proving a problem, as they wanted something fun, and all the cars they could find were automatic econoboxes from the 90’s.

Eventually, Monty remembered the old Salvo, and the two of them got it out of the storage container it had been in for 17 of the last 50 years. They’d looked after it at first, sure, but they had kind of forgotten about it the last 15 years or so.

They got it out, and found 2 things:

  1. The car itself was fine, barring a bit of rusting through in the floor boards in places.

  2. The engine however, was fucked. Somewhere, it had gotten full of water, and rusted from the inside out.

After Leon complained that that meant that most of his handiwork was ruined, they ran into a bit of a dilemma. Building an identical copy would require taking the engine apart and painstakingly examined, and it had been a while since they had used most of the machinery involved. And a new engine out of one of their modern cars felt like cheating, not to mention the fact that they didn’t think they had one that fit.

Soon, they realised a trip to the scrapyard was in order. After a bit of searching, they found two options: the engine out of a high mileage C1, or a 750cc motorbike engine. The C1 would probably be more reliable, and have more torque, but modern ECU’s are a nightmare, and getting the engine to run properly, once they got it to fit in the car at all, would take a loooong time.

So the decision was made to have the bike engine. Once dynoed, they were pleasantly suprised by 100hp, and a smooth torque curve. More the enough to make the tiny car go like a rocket.

So the preparations began.

While the 2 gather supplies, I present to you, the Mole Salvo

KGT- rileybanks - Mole Salvo-3.png1366×768 851 KB

KGT- rileybanks - Mole Salvo-4.png1366×768 869 KB

The Team:

Leon: The drivetrain guy. Also pretty good at reading maps. Growing up in the middle of nowhere does that to you.

Monty: The “everything else” guy. Was a racing driver in his day, and isn’t shabby even with his age.

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TEAM OUTRIDERS

Blake: That’s the last thing loaded in, let’s rock.

Marc: Shotgun!

Luigi: Dammit!

Marc: You snooze, you lose. Besides, shouldn’t all Italians sit in the back anyway?

Luigi: Wrong race idiot!

Blake: I should’ve brought a tape recorder.

(With a turn of the key, the Enforcer cranks and immediately roars to life. The engine taking on a more baritone exhaust note this time around.)

Blake: First tunnel we find, we’re putting the windows down and dropping the hammer.

Marc: Our luck this feather-footed bitch will be behind the wheel when that happens.

Luigi: I bet I could drive circles around you!

Marc: You couldn’t even drive circles around a NASCAR circuit!

Blake: Okay, navigator, we’re going to the Coupeville Ferry Terminal, direct us.

Marc: Roger.

Luigi: Let me see that map.

Marc: He said navigator, not bitch. Besides, there’s no big pictures in this map, you’ll just get confused.

Luigi: Bite me.

Marc: Okay, we’re taking I5 to SR20. We’ll be crossing Deception Pass Bridge.

Luigi: Oy ve!

Blake: Is it me or do some of the others seem a tad sluggish?

Marc: Probably hung over, God that takes me back.

Luigi: In my country when you turn 21 you have to serve in the military until age 35. Once you turn 36, you are executed.

Marc: You came from Italy moron! They never had any kind of rule like that!

Luigi: How would you know? You’ve never been there. You wouldn’t last long in Italy.

Marc: Neither would you, that’s why they dumped your ass on our soil! An act of war if you ask me.

Luigi: At least I don’t need a crowbar when I open my wallet! How’s your Roth IRA doing?

Marc: Well, racism aside it’s doing fine, racism intended, suck it!

(ring ring)

Luigi: Hello? Oh, hi Isabella… No, we just got on the road… Everything’s going well… The car handles like a dream… What? (shouts out a string of Italian profanities which I do not know any so I couldn’t provide examples) Possession? Of what? Oh for God’s sake! I thought I taught him better than that! You bet I’m gonna talk to him when we get back, that’s unacceptable! Okay… I’ll talk to you later… I love you too… Bye.

Marc: What was that all about?

Luigi: Antonio got arrested with a bag of heroin!

Marc: Son of a bitch! What was he thinking?

Luigi: Probably nothing at all, I swear he doesn’t bother to think at times.

Marc: I should show him some of our more seedy convicts when we get back. That should help convince him.

Luigi: What gives you the right to counsel my son?

Marc: You did when you made me his Godfather you ass!

Luigi: Oh, right.

Blake: Heroin, that’s horrible.

(The mood in the car was a bit somber while they drove to the bridge)

Marc: Okay you two, hold still.

Luigi: You know your ass is ugly when they’ve got you holding the camera for the group photo.

Marc: Suck my meatballs! (click) Okay, we’re good.

Blake: Let’s go, we gotta catch that ferry, I don’t want to wait 45 minutes for the next one.

(Arrival at the ferry)

Marc: Awesome, we made it.

Luigi: So far, so good.

Blake: Well, looks like the others are feeling a little better from their hangovers.

Luigi: You thinking what I’m thinking?

Marc: Oh hell yeah!

Blake,Marc,Luigi:

What do you do with a drunken sailor
What do you do with a drunken sailor
What do you do with a drunken sailor early in the morning

Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises early in the morning

Blake:

Shave his belly with a rusty razor
Shave his belly with a rusty razor
Shave his belly with a rusty razor early in the morning

Blake,Marc,Luigi:

Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises early in the morning

Marc:

Put him in a longboat til he’s sober
Put him in a longboat til he’s sober
Put him in a longboat til he’s sober early in the morning

Blake,Marc,Luigi:

Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises early in the morning

Luigi:

Stick him in the skupper with a hosepipe on him
Stick him in the skupper with a hosepipe on him
Stick him in the skupper with a hosepipe on him early in the morning

Blake,Marc,Luigi:

Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises early in the morning

Blake:

Put him in a bed with the captain’s daughter
Put him in a bed with the captain’s daughter
Put him in a bed with the captain’s daughter early in the morning!

Blake,Marc,Luigi:

Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises early in the morning

That’s what you do with a drunken sailor
That’s what you do with a drunken sailor
That’s what you do with a drunken sailor early in the morning

Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises early in the morning

Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises
Way hay and up she rises early in the morning

Marc: I think that got us some glares.

Luigi: They’re just jealous of our sobriety.

Blake: Looks like one of the team Greasy Lightning guys is coming over.

Fuzz: Was that an actual cop car at some point?

Blake: No, just an administrative vehicle which turned out to have widely understated mileage.

Fuzz: We don’t have any of those in my department, I’m a tad curious how these old things handled.

Blake: From a mechanic standpoint I loved them. Tried and true, and in the long run, very cheap to maintain. Unlike a number of the newer cars out there.

Marc: We retired our last Enforcer from mainline service two months ago. For what they were, they were good. But the platform was showing its age. The biggest kicker was when the Owosso came out with an interceptor package. The Enforcer was updated a year later, but was only barely better. When they went to a turbo AWD Owosso, in 2010, it was over.

Fuzz: I heard those latest Owossos were quick.

Marc: Twin turbo 3.5L V6 AWD. She’ll kick some ass in a pursuit.

Luigi: And kick our ass in maintenance.

Marc: Yeah, upkeep is a bit on the flip side. That’s why we’re switching over to the Blackfoot. Not too much difference performance-wise to the Owosso, and much cheaper to maintain.

Fuzz: Any custom Interceptors in your department?

Marc: We used to use a '94 Montauk Trans Am. That thing was sold at auction five years ago.

Blake: Hello.

Marc: You bought that thing?

Blake: Yup, my latest racing project.

Marc: Why haven’t I seen it then?

Blake: Because it’s like most projects, delayed by time and lack of funds.

Marc: Anyway, after that was retired, we didn’t see much of a need. Especially with how the new Interceptors perform. Even the Seneca SUVs can kick it up. What does your department use?

Fuzz: The latest Ardent Sentinels.

Marc: Good safety record on those Sentinels.

Fuzz: What’s your favorite of the cars you’ve driven?

Marc: Honestly, I’d say the Petoskey Blackfoot. Latest technology while maintaining the traditional RWD V8 configuration. Plus that 301 ScramJet is a beast. That thing will survive anything short of an atomic attack. Even then we’d probably be okay.

Fuzz: I bet you see a fair bit of action.

Marc: Well… (Lifts up his shirt to reveal a purple and yellow splotch on his torso)

Blake: What the hell happened?

Marc: Last weekend, I responded to a call about “suspicious behavior” at 3rd St. and Westlake Blvd.

Blake: Don’t a bunch of skinheads hang out there?

Marc: Why yes, by an amazing coincidence, they do. And it turns out that the only thing they hate more than Jews are cops. Plus, they tend to hang in groups of four or more. So guess how my evening went?

Fuzz: Wow, did you… kill any of them?

Marc: Thankfully no, but they know they’ve been in a fight. That’s for damn sure. Those not in jail are in the hospital waiting to transfer to jail.

Fuzz: I haven’t seen much action, it’s been dull. Writing reports and such.

Marc: (Pulls out a chain around his neck with a bent and distorted Star of David on the end) Son, be careful what you wish for. You’ll find pushing pencils is far more enjoyable than taking a slug.

Fuzz: Yeesh, that looks like it was a close call.

Marc: Half an inch and I wouldn’t be here. If not for this necklace, I’d be dead now.

Fuzz: Wow, I can honestly say I didn’t think that much into it.

Marc: Just remember if you’re doing a drug bust, to duck when breaking down the door.

Fuzz: I will.

Marc: And watch out for Italians, they are never to be trusted.

Luigi: I heard that.

Marc: Don’t worry about this one though, he’s too stupid to be a threat.

Fuzz: You always bicker like this?

Luigi: Usually unless we’re actually mad at each other.

Marc: It is when we’re silent you should be afraid.

Blake: Definitely a ton of fun working with these two, listening to them go back and forth.

Fuzz: Well, I should be getting back.

Marc: Should you ever be by Tatum Heights, look me up, I can arrange for you to take a spin in an Enforcer if you like, we’ve got a few in the Reserves.

Fuzz: Take it easy.

Marc: You too.

Blake: Seems like a nice guy.

Marc: Seems like a headstrong ass. It’s like looking in a mirror. He’s gonna turn out okay.

Luigi: Either I’m getting seasick, or this sentimentality is making me want to puke.

Marc: Oh get over it. Ah! Smell that breeze.

Blake: A pity I don’t have a small fortune to burn, I would like to own a boat.

Marc: And how many “projects” are sitting in your back yard currently?

Blake: Three… including the Enforcer.

Marc: And how many of them are currently pissing off Charlotte?

Blake: All of them.

Marc: Case and point.

Luigi: You gotta put your foot down. Just say “This is how it will be” and leave it at that!

Blake: Hmm, and how many times have you been divorced?

Luigi: (sigh) three.

Blake: Exactly.

(I apologize if this seems excessively long, I got a little carried away.)

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It’s all about that role-playing though!

I will hopefully get my response for the day up tomorrow, too tired after today.

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I suppose it’s a consequence of getting into character of three old men ranting.

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Legend of Terms:

TBDC: Time Block Distance Covered. This is the amount of mileage covered during the current 2 hour period.
ODC: Overall Distance Covered. This is the total distance that the team has covered since Noon on Friday
MRL: Morale modifier
FTG: Fatigue Level
Notes: Any notes I have for your team during this time block. Including POI results, car issues, etc.

Friday, 2PM - 4PM

Weather Conditions: 65 degrees, partly cloudy.

All vehicles are on US101 South (going West, oddly enough) at this point.

Upcoming POI (optional, let me know if you want to stop at them for rest/sightseeing): Crescent Lake, Forks WA (not that I expect there to be too many Twilight fans here)

VicVictory:
TBDC: 51 mi OD: 137 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park).

@yurimacs
TBDC: 51 mi OD: 137 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park). Following slightly behind the Ardent Chancellor seems to be a comfortable pace for this team.

@Fayeding_Spray
TBDC: 52 mi OD: 138 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park).

@Madrias
TBDC: 54 mi OD: 140 mi MRL: +1 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park). Team has noticed that braking is a bit squirrely, something that wasn’t noticed before on the primarily Interstate drive during the last section. After getting out of Port Townsend, driver got pretty aggressive and passed several other cars.

@BobLoblaw
TBDC: 52 mi OD: 138 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park).

@CriticalSet9849
TBDC: 52 mi OD: 138 mi MRL: +1 FTG: +2 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park). You’re starting to realize just how crappy, loud, and uncomfortable this car is. Grandma’s getting kinda fidgety.

@BailsMackenzie
TBDC: 54 mi OD: 140 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +2 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park).

@Mikonp7
TBDC: 50 mi OD: 136 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park).

@TheBobWiley
TBDC: 53 mi OD: 139 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park).

@DeusExMackia
TBDC: 51 mi OD: 137 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes:Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park). Traveling in the trailing pack with the Ardent and the Zast.

@HighOctaneLove
TBDC: 54 mi OD: 140 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park). In the leading pack with the Minerva and IA.

@strop
TBDC: 54 mi OD: 140 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park). Also in the lead pack.

@stm316
TBDC: 53 mi OD: 139 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park). Linked up with the Bil for a mini-pack.

@JohnWaldock / @Sillyducky
TBDC: 52 mi OD: 138 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park).

@abg7
TBDC: 40 mi OD: 146 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park).

@rileybanks
TBDC: 43 mi OD: 140 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park). Also in the lead pack.

@koolkei / @FrankNSTein
TBDC: 15 mi OD: 101 mi MRL: -3 FTG: +2 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park). The Scela wouldn’t start when the ferry was unloading. Had to be pushed off the ferry by workers. Fortunately, there was an auto parts store (O’reilly’s) a few blocks from the terminal. One new battery and negative battery cable later, and the team is back up and running.

@Rk38
TBDC: 51 mi OD: 137 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park). Part of the trailing pack with the Ardent, Zast, and Erin.

@Nomade0013 / @ramthecowy
TBDC: 50 mi OD: 136 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +1 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park).

@SkylineFTW97
TBDC: 51 mi OD: 137 mi MRL: +2 FTG: +2 Notes: Waypoint completed (Fort Worden State Park).

Team Greasy Lightning

Team/Car info

Rick closed the liftgate of the Chancellor and collected the three bottles of water he had placed on the roof. He looked forward down the entire length of the Salish’s auto deck.

“Hon? Where’d Fuzz go?” he asked.

“Said he wanted to go say hi to another team. The guys in the cop car.”

“Ah. Makes sense.” Rick noticed someone walking towards them with a grin on his face. “Speaking of, looks like we’ve got a visitor.”

“Hey there,” the young competitor chirped. “How’s it going?”

“Good, good.” Rick stepped around the side of his car to meet their visitor. “You’re in the Erin Merna, right?”

“Yeah. New contest, new ride. Stock 1.6 litre 4 banger. A bit of a different look and feel than last time for sure.”

Rick snapped his fingers, putting together where he had last seen this fellow. “That’s right. You were in the Roulette Runner, right? What’s your name, again?”

“James.”

“Rick.” Handshakes were quickly exchanged. “So I read that you guys finished the Roulette Runner. That’s awesome, that thing was tough! What was it like to complete the whole thing?”

A wide grin crept across James’s face. “Amazing. Worth every minute of it. Not to mention that we placed pretty well, which was a nice little bonus.”

Jen chimed in. “Hoping for a repeat this time?”

“Of course. We’re not going to go balls out, at least not yet. We figure if we enjoy the cruise we’ll be rewarded one way or another.”

Jen smirked at Rick. “See? Told you”.

(… To Be Continued by DeusExMackia)

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Team Mountain Pass

Friday, day one, 2pm - 4pm

Team Mountain Pass

After disembarking from the ferry we all jumped into the Ambassador and tried to get in front of the pack. Since all but team 1’) disembarked without incident, this was a rather herculean task for the Bogliq to undertake. Within minutes of the ferry we were passed by, much to our surprise, an AussieDM Corolla! Painted in black metallic, the grandma-spec hatch was scarred with flames, pink alloys and one hideous mo-fo of a wing… A number of other cars passed us as well but I was pleased to say that we were able to keep up with the faster cars so far.

Pierre and Andrew spent the time arguing about the merits of turbocharging a Corolla, then they argued incessantly about the ethics of taking your grandma with you on the tour; Pierre was in favour, since he was getting old himself and Andrew was against, since he thought he still had a chance with the ladies! I avoided commenting as I wanted to feel out how the Ambassador was handling, since I’ll be racing it later on in the year, but I kinda agree with Andrew; being stuck with an elderly relative for 1600 miles is going to be rather unpleasent, to say the least…

Distance covered (this session): 51 miles
Distance covered (total): 137 miles
Morale: +2 (+4 total) Car carves up the turns nicely, no-one hates each other… yet
Fatigue: +1 (+1 total) Driving a manual Bogliq Ambassador through the twisties is a lot of work! :grin:

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##Team Artiseros
Day 1,Part 2

Disembarking the ferry,the trio was heading on the real part of the challenge.Ernie still doing the driving and the two just snoozing off.They passed by the first waypoint,looking at the cars that passed by them.Lots of cars to look at, one car that looked like a Toyota (Yaris?) with a huge wing,another a red van.

Upon seeing the Ardent,Ernie decided to keep up with it to prove to Aldren that the car was a not snail.

Ernie: See that car up ahead? We are keeping up with it,pretty much proves that this car isnt slow.

Aldren: Probably because it has a small engine.

Ernie: Hearing it has a 6-cylinder Turbo,I suppose its the weight of it that’s slowing it down.

Aldren: Whatever.gets a bottle of beer in the car

Ernie: The car seems to be stopping,lets just be safe and not overuse the engine.Besides,We dont really know our way here.
(car pulls over near the Ardent)

Aldren: Good thing,probably just gonna check the engine if it is just fine.

Ateri:(finally waking up,being sober) youu… said… about checking… the … engine…

Aldren: Ahhh,finally you are awake.

(right door opens)

Aldren: Ernie,open the hood.

Ernie: Ok.

(hood opens)

Aldren: Geez,the engine bay is full of rust.Not much difference from the last inspection

Ateri: The whole time the car was tilting a bit much because of that suspension.

Aldren: Ateri hand me over the toolkit,i will do a bit of inspection and maintenance if i have to.

Ateri: Ok

Distance Covered: 51 miles Total Distance Covered: 137 Morale:+2 (Ernie being happy it isnt the slowest car and more snacking) Fatigue:+1(just a little inspection just in case) [ Team & Car info](http://discourse.automationgame.com/t/the-kinda-grand-tour-friday-noon-2p/20895/10?u=yurimacs)

Previous Part

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Team Twin-Snail

Day 1, Stage 1

While they were still on the ferry, Luke rummaged through his bag of things in the trunk, looking for his OBD-II adapter cable. Unable to find it among his supplies, he slammed the trunk lid shut and got back in the car, then flipped through their collection of music, trying to decide whether it was a rock or metal kind of time.

Amy, Scott, and Linda returned to the car with minutes to spare before unloading, getting settled and helping Luke decide on the music. Looks like it’ll be Garth Brooks instead.

2 PM, Friday.

Once they got off the boat, it was obvious that Luke wanted to get away from the water. Even before the Midnight’s CD player had finished swallowing the disc, Luke stomped on the gas, causing the car to hesitate slightly, then suddenly roar and spin the driver’s side tire as the engine bounced off the rev limiter three times. Mercifully, the automatic started upshifting, and the lack of gearing advantage kept it from doing any further damage to the tires as team Twin Snail hurtled onto the highway.

A nice section of winding road showed another few of the Minerva’s mild faults, as the aged tires and worn brakes worked together with the natural lift-off oversteer caused by their semi-trailing arm rear suspension to make the car a little squirmy under braking. Luke seemed to have it under control, but Scott had something to say about it.

“Luke, the wiggling around back here’s making me seasick.”

“Scott, that’s probably because you had a beer while on the boat.” Amy replied. “Though I’ll admit, that feels odd from this car. Still, the solution remains available at any time, swing by an auto parts store and get brake pads and maybe some new tires. After all, we’re going to need to stop to mess with the intake system on the car.”

“Not yet. Rather have something interesting for you three to do while I fix the car. Nothing interesting yet.” Luke said.

“Yeah. Even I don’t like Twilight that much.” Linda commented as they made it out of the twisties.

As Luke saw several cars up ahead, the urge to go fast overwhelmed the desire to keep the car in one piece, and he buried his foot to the firewall. A brief hiccup was followed by a muted, snarling roar from the 3.6 liter, 200-ish horsepower V6 under the hood. Having driven through Chicago his whole life, Luke was an expert at fitting a large amount of car into spaces it shouldn’t fit, and he took every opportunity to weave through traffic, the engine snarling as Luke prodded it onward.

“Jesus Christ, Luke! You just about cut the nose off of that Ardent. And the Erin. And the Zast. Holy shit, you’re not gonna try to pass the big Bushell wagon on the shoulder, are you? Oh, fuck, Luke, get off the gas, that team’s nothing but cops!” Amy yelled as Luke pelted the car through traffic, his foot flat to the floor, the engine screaming as the transmission held onto fourth gear.

Luke lifted and the mighty V6 burbled and rumbled as the transmission finally settled into 5th gear overdrive, having made quite a bit of ground on some of the competition. He gave the truck horns a light blast, then passed another car on the way to Fort Worden State Park.

At 4 PM, team Twin-Snail evaluated where they were at and figured they’d managed 54 miles in the past two hours, making for 140 miles total.

Aftermath

Car: Still seems okay enough. Needs the brakes and tires checked along with the air-system maintenance. Waiting for a decently-interesting POI to do that.

Team:
-Luke: Feeling Bold and confident in the Minerva
-Amy: Wishing Luke would drive normally and not like he had a death wish.
-Scott: “I think I’m gonna puke.” Didn’t like Luke’s aggressive driving.
-Linda: “That’s my kinda driving! More!” Wants to go faster. Thinks they could outrun the cops, if they had to.

MRL +3 overall
FTG +1 overall
“The road is long and winding, and our journey’s just begun. Problems we are finding, but that’s just half the fun.”

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Previous Post || Next Post

Team: Clutch Droppers

Day 1: 12-2pm

After the driver meeting concluded it was time to say goodbye to Ryan’s jeep for a few days. After locking it and ensuring it had a legible note for the park rangers on the inside of the windshield we strode over to our 90’s abomination and fired it up for the start of the event. One final check of our items and the car and we were off to the start line. To get us in the mood I popped the aux cable into my phone and loaded up one of my most played albums:

As the flag dropped I hammered the gas pedal, after a gloriously long burnout the car finally found traction in 2nd gear, shooting out of the park entrance and onto the main road, we were off!

Cruising down I5 towards Deception Pass Bridge and the Coupeville ferry terminal we DEFINITELY maintained the speed limit, like totes, for sure. It was a nice day for driving, 63 degrees and partly cloudy, allowing us to cruise along with the windows down and music blaring. Jason was in the back seat playing on his 3DS, it was either a Final Fantasy or other RPG/tactics game. Ryan was writing down some coding notes in the passenger seat and tapping along to the music.

Ryan: O YES! Don’t Stop Me Now!!!

All: I’M A SHOOTING STAR LEAPING THROUGH THE SKY
LIKE A TIGER DEFYING THE LAWS OF GRAVITYYYYYYYY
I’M A RACING CAR PASSING BY LIKE LADY GODIVA
I’M GOING TO GO GO GO
THERE’S NO STOPPPING ME!!!

i’M BURNING THROUGH THE SKY, YEAH
TWO HUNDRED DEEGRESS, THAT’S WHY THEY CALL ME MISTER FAHRENHEIT
I’M TRAVELING AT THE SPEED OF LIGHTTTTTTTT
I WANT TO MAKE A SUPERSONIC MAN OUT OF YOU!!!

Once the song had faded away I glanced at the speedometer and realized we MAY have gone a tad over the speed limit so I let off the gas a bit, besides we were getting close to the bridge by now.

Pulling off to the side just before the bridge we got out quickly to take a picture and stretch a bit.

Whipping out his phone Ryan walks over to the side a bit to get a nice shot of the bridge.

Bob: Alright let’s hurry up, we are burning time here! Pile back in so we can make the first ferry!

A little while later we had exhausted our Queen music, but had also reached the ferry. We were a bit disappointed to see we were not the first ones there, but still pretty early considering how many cars had set off this morning and how many were at the ferry already. While we waited for the other cars to show up Ryan and I took some photos of the beautiful scenery and chatted with the other teams as they arrived. Jason stayed in the car charging and playing his 3DS. Thank god we had remembered to bring not only some AC adapters for the car, but also our own personal battery banks.

Ryan: Hey, either of you want some jerky? 'cause it’s jerky time!

Jason and Bob: Ew, no.

Bob: I do have a little bacon based jerky though, and it’s actually good!

Jason: cracks open a Mountain Dew This is all I need to survive…

Bob: Don’t go wasting all of the supplies already guys, we have a long drive ahead of us and I don’t want to waste time stopping for food and drinks. I only want to stop when we absolutely have to… I would tell you to pee in a cup, but that is a bit extreme honestly.

Ryan: I just realized… why were we so determined to get to the ferry “first”? Now we are near the front of the boat and when we get to the other side… we are almost last getting off. That will surely hurt us as there may be a few faster cars near the back of the ferry that just did not drive as hard down here…

Bob: Ummmmmm… you may have a point. I guess I will just have to be aggressive getting off the ferry. Would it be frowned upon to simply push the other cars out of the way?

Jason: I think that cop guy would do you in if you tried it.

Bob: Right…

Day 1: 2-4pm

After the ferry finally docked and the cars started to roll off we gave the map a once over and started the car up. Surprisingly it sprung right to life and felt ready to tackle the next section of road. After all the slow poke cars near the rear of the ferry had finally cleared away I put my foot down, a bit less vigorously than earlier, and immediately shot ahead a few of the slower cars still struggling to get up to speed outside of the ferry port.

Bob: looks like we have another POI coming up, do you guys want to get out for a quick break?

Ryan: Nah, we just had a break on the ferry, let’s see how much distance we can put between us and everyone behind us.

Jason: Totally engrossed in his game

Bob: Pops in the trusty aux cable and loads up some Hamilton (the music is so damn good!)

Jason: What, this again?? Every time we are in the car you play this, give it a rest just this once.

Ryan: Yeah, let’s get some more rock!

Bob: Fine, fine… Styx good?

Jason and Ryan: Yeah

As the sweet melodies of Styx reverberated within the car and surrounding countryside we pounded away at the miles in relative comfort. Passing Forks we couldn’t help but make jokes about the movies. Jason and I had actually enjoyed the first book quite a lot (still can’t tell you why I liked it as much as I did), but the movies were just garbage.

Morale: +4 (Things are going good and we are near the front of the pack)
Fatigue: +1 (The driver’s seat is in terrible shape and it’s starting to wear on me a bit)

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OT: Is it intentional that ODC isn’t the sum of TBDC’s for some teams?

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tell it’s not just me that can’t read it normally, and instead sung the song…

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Team BAGS

Brian: So far so good; there’s another point of interest coming up…

Gary: Should we stop there?

Amy: If we do, we could use the time lost to take a breather.

Stephanie: But I don’t think it will be necessary to do so yet. Our fatigue is not severe enough at such an early stage in this trip.

Brian: So we should just keep driving, then? All in favor say “Aye”.

("The other three team members all say “Aye” at once with minimal hesitation.)

Brian: OK then, we won’t stop at Crescent Lake; we’ll just drive past it instead. If anyone or the car has a problem, please let me know.

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team 1’); drop table participants; – (aka Team Bobby Tables)

Friday, 2pm-4pm

As the ferry approached the docks at Port Townsend, Da Wei and Frank headed down to their car. Some teams were busy planning the next section or adjusting stuff, others were still on their way down from the passenger deck. Some loud country music was heard from team Twin-Snails’ car.

Frank: Wanna drive? Takes the car keys out of his pocket
Da Wei: Take it easy, we’re on the end of the ferry. we’ll be launching last anyway. but it’s a bit cold though, i’ll turn the car on and get the heater on

*grab the key
*put into ignition
*start the engine
*engine turned on but dies again

Da Wei : huh, battery must be low

*tries to start the engine again
*nothing

Da Wei : uh…. shit…… the indicator lights on the dash goes kaputt when i try to start it. frank, can you get the voltmeter from the trunk? it’s in the brown leather bag. it’s where most of our tools are in.

Frank gets out of the car and looks for the bag with the voltmeter in the trunk.

Frank: Found it. Can you open the hood?

*pulls hood lever

Da Wei : there you go.

Frank turns on the voltmeter and attaches it to the two battery terminals. The voltmeter shows 7.3V

Frank: Shit. That thing’s gone.

Da Wei : 7. how the hell does a battery goes as low as 7v…… never seen that before. also, how did the car even run on that battery…. amazing that nothing was broken because of that. but you know what? i left behind your 6 bags of marshmellow behind and put in a battery jumper on the back. hehehe. i’ll go and get it.

They attached the jump starter and tried again to start the car. It started, but as soon as the jumper was removed it began to stutter and turned off again.

Da Wei : Right then…… i knew this car were a bit too clean for it’s price. but i didn’t expect it to show up at the start of the event. now what? the ferry’s already empty, and the workers are just waiting for us.

Two dock workers had seen what happened to us and offered us to push the car off the ferry. They also told us there was an auto parts store down the road.
As soon as the car was parked at the docks, we headed for said parts store. We arrived there, exhausted from running half a mile.

Frank: There it is. I hope they have a spare battery.

Da Wei : they better do. we’re already so far behind. and grab 2 while we’re at it. i did not know how that battery got to 7v. and i’m afraid it might do that again.

Frank: Good. Let’s get two of them.

$180 spent on two batteries, they arrived back at the car. Da Wei installs the battery in the car, but it still won’t start.

Da Wei : the F*ck’s wrong this time? oh wait

noticed a burnt part of the negative cable

Da Wei : oh well damn. now that i noticed it. this wire is too freaking thin, and i think we somehow burnt it when using the jumper.

Frank: Shit. Did we take some spare wire with us?

Da Wei : not proper ones. i brought some wires, but none is thick enough for this. you rest, i’ll go back to the store. you still need to drive after all this. okay?

goes back to the store to get some thick ground wire. and then, another 20 minutes later

Da Wei : huff huff here you go huff huff, you can install it right? huff just 2 screws. huff i gotta catch my breath

Frank: Ok. Get on the passenger seat and have some rest.

Frank replaces the old, burnt wire with the new one, then gets in the car and tries to start. The car started and kept running. Both Frank and Da Wei felt relieved.
Frank threw the burnt wire in a waste bin, asked the workers around who had helped them to dispose the battery and gave them a tip of $10.

Da Wei : right. we got some catching up to do. time to use all of whatever’s left of that 216HP that existed in 1985

With Frank on the driver’s seat, the team headed for the road, really pushing the old Scela trying to catch up to the other teams.

Morale: -3 (-1 total)
Fatigue: +2 (+2 total)

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2-4PM
Wookiee: Hey, Bill. You’ll love this first POI. They made those movies here, you know, tho ones you took your wife to.
Bill: That narrows it down.
Wookiee: With the whole sparkly monster thing.
Bill: What are you on about? Oh, wait… the gay porn thing?
Wookiee: So you did watch them!
Toni: Boys! It’s a bit early to start on each other.
Wookiee: No fun.
Bill: Fine. (pulls out map). We’ve got, what 50 miles to the next stop, how are we going to not be bored senseless?
Toni: Pull out the camera. See if you can get a snap of this… car we’re coming up on. We’ll run with them for a while.
(Wookiee pulls out the camera, and Bill grabs his audio player/speaker.)

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#Team ‘Southend or Bust’
Original Post - Previous Post

…Continuing from VicVictory here,
James chuckled. “So then” he asked, “why something so old for such a long drive?”
“We wanted something with a little character” answered Rick, looking proudly at the car. “Chancellors are kind of rare, especially the GL trim. Plus, how often do you see something with a red leather interior?”
“Fair points, and it is a very nice red isn’t it?” admired James, inspecting the interior through the windows. “There must be something a bit iffy about it though”.
Jen and Rick smiled. “Well, it’s an old car, everything is bound to go wrong on it at some point” said Jen in a bright tone.

“What about the engine then? I’m sure if Martin was here he’d be able to list all the major problems these cars had with their engines” said James.
“Actually it’s been reworked and fixed up quite nicely” Rick began. “New head gasket, new timing chain kit, new manifold gaskets, and the throttle body was thoroughly cleaned. The turbo was checked for excessive play, and got new gaskets as well.”
James nodded in appreciation.
“Did we forget to mention it’s the same engine that was in our Suzume last time around?”
“No? Seriously? Reusing old parts?” said James.
“Yeah, no point putting a unit like that to waste”
“Can’t argue with that” returned James. “And to drive? Is it good?”
“It’s actually not that bad. The turbo helps it move along once it kicks in, but unlike the original V8, it doesn’t cause the back end to break loose in holy hell off the line” said Rick as though he were giving a detailed lecture. “And this thing is cushy as hell. Fuzz hasn’t complained once about the back seat.”
Fuzz shouted something in agreement.

James chuckled. “Damn, well I certainly wouldn’t have as much confidence as you to bring something this old along.”
“I guess that’s the spirit of the challenge” Jen added. “And we couldn’t just quit after last time. We felt there was unfinished business. That, and it was an excuse to go see some fantastic scenery while doing something a little nuts”
“Isn’t it gorgeous around here, eh?” replied James. “Well, I better get back. Nice talking to you though, best of luck”.

.

“So they were nice people then?” asked Martin.
“Yeah, great people. Lovely car too” replied James, scanning the map. “I really cannot wait to see the Pacific properly”
“Me neither” said Seb, mockingly. James knew excatly what was coming next. “Because we’re in the Pacific North West, where a certain TV show was set, wasn’t it Martin?”
“Yeah” Martin joined in. James sighed. “I think it was called…”
Seb cracked a smile. James grimaced.
“…Twilight?”
Seb paused. He thought Martin had been going along with the joke. “No Martin, it’s Twin Peaks, remember? 'Cos James is named after”
“YES SEB, we ALL know who I’m named after” James butted in.
“But seriously Seb, Twilight was set in these parts” replied Martin, feeling genuinely confused.
“Have you actually watched Twilight?” asked Seb.
Silence fell in the car.

“Well, I think we should put some music on” James burst out, scrambling for the aux cable and his phone. Moments later, Dance Hall Days came on over the old speakers.
“Ohh, now this is a proper driving song!” said Martin, reaching for his shades.


“Ayy! Join the club!” said James, whacking out his beloved pair.
“Oh come on guys, mine are in the boot” said Seb, frustrated.
“Too bad, mate” said Martin, looking ahead and smiling.
“Wohh!” Seb shouted suddenly as the Minerva tore past.
“Fucking christ balls” shouted Martin, blaring the Merna’s little horn. “What are Twin Snail doing?”
“I’m telling you, Americans can’t drive” said Seb.
“I’m beginning to agree with you” replied Martin.

Thankfully, the rest of the journey was a breeze, and soon enough, they were on the outskirts of the Pacific coastline.

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