now that is sneaky
Sure it’s a little cheeky, but tbh I believe it’s still within the spirit of the rules. It’s a classic RWD muscle car in a different outfit, really. It’s still meant to look sporty and cool in that retro way. The bed’s pretty much useless and the ride height is quite low. The reviews will determine its’ fate, however…
No, I am sneaky… sim
3 Likes
Swanson 437SC
How is it retro again? Well it’s been around since the 80s (technically the coupe wasn’t launched until 1992) and has a whiff of white powder to it. Real nerds can probably find design elements from 50 years ago, but anyone can appreciate a low beltline and lots of glass, camera crew included.
Is it cool? Depends, let’s see what the telly fellas think.
Anyway “-37” means big 6 opposed piston energy with a 12.9s 1/4mile. (I forgor the loudness part)
Entries closed!
Since the last post, I’ve gotten cars from:
@TheYugo45GV
@Knugcab
@HelloHi
@Ludvig
Expect results soon!
3 Likes
For all I know, the Skyliner is, to all intents and purposes, a remake of the Slamtruck from CSR 136. That time, it didn’t go too well:
Then again, it would have found favor with a different client.
Bins & round 1 judging
ABC Acquisitions office, Ultimo Centre, Sydney
The production staff for The Pair are having a meeting to make a shortlist from the proposals for star car, with director David Peterson and writer John Norman going over the cars themselves to weed out what won't work.
First order of business, some cars that don’t quite meet the requirements.
In the bin
The Warbler Skyliner
@HelloHi
Bin reason: It's an SUV
I appreciate the effort to try find a loophole, but I pretty clearly said no SUVs, and chopping something into a ute and clicking detachable hardtop doesn’t change that it’s an SUV according to the game.
It’s also just… not what I was going for. Yes it’s retro styled in the same way the PT Cruiser was, but that doesn’t mean it’s a looker or cool at all.
Cheapest car by a longshot though, and the most drivable by a slim margin. It was so much cheaper than everything else that I actually had to exclude its price from my spreadsheet to keep the rest of the field meaningfully separated in the colour coding I had set up.
The IVERA Imperium RS
@TheYugo45GV
Bin reason: Too much techpool
Rather nice car outside of having 48/20 techpool!
A pretty cool performance luxo barge, it didn’t really live up to its looks or pricetag. For being almost $10k more than the other luxury car submitted and the most expensive car in the field, only really the sportiness and noise are at the pointy end of the field, everything else is either good, but not great, or average. Looks-wise though it’s pure performance class and it’s a shame to see it go.
Judging round 1
“Alright mates, let’s get this show on the road!” said David “We’ve got a few cars to go through and I want to be home in time to watch the footy. John mate, what’s the first car for today?”
The Deer And Hunt SuperCoupe SuperRoad Convertible
@Mikonp7
“Woah,” David chuckled, “that’s a mouthful and a half”
“Yeah man, a supermouthful” John said, “But damn is it basically exactly what I had in mind, it’s sick”
“Yeah nah mate, that it is.”
VERDICT: through to round two
The Helron Callamester VX360 (5th Gen)
@IDK158
“Yeah, it looks sporty…” David started, a frown quite evident.
“But?”
“But I’ve seen reviews of it, and it’s a bit of a shitshow. Expensive, loud, uncomfortable, and drinks fuel faster than a V8 Supercar. We’re passing on this one.”
VERDICT: out of the running
Looks like an AMG/HSV/FPV style factory modified car, feels like a race car.
I know price and noise were only one star priorities, but for the most expensive car in the field after the bins the stats really aren’t very nice. 69 engine noise is nice, but only in the meme sense, the next closest car was 51 and even that’s a bit loud. Then there’s the abysmal comfort, the drivability that trails the next worst car by 10 whole points, and the fuel economy of 24.8L/100km.
And then there’s the lore. A nameplate newer than some of the models of car submitted to this challenge isn’t really retro at all. This whole car really kinda feels like it was made for a different challenge to this and kinda just shoehorned into this one.
The Basilio GT6
@conan
"Oh hell yeah, the Tassie!
“Tassie? Mate that’s the Basilio GT6!”
“Yeah, nah, she’ll always be the Tassie to me. A fun little Euro sports car with a fair bit of character, love it.”
VERDICT: through to round two
The Durendal Nighthawk
@GassTiresandOil
“Fuck yeah mate, some proper Aussie muscle!”
“It’s on the more expensive end, but hopefully Howard doesn’t get too pissed at aunty for a nice car in a show.”
“Yeah mate, plus from what I’ve heard it’s almost supercar quick, easy pick on this one.”
VERDICT: through to round two
The Wells Panther
@DuceTheTruth100
“Woah there, did someone submit a concept car?”
“Seems like it mate. 2000 but looks like something from 2040.”
“Easy pass on that, we’re going for realism, not Transformers style rule of cool!”
VERDICT: out of the running
An otherwise fine car, this looks like if someone tried to make the 2005 Mustang today, way too modern for 2000. The low comfort and economy, and the third loudest engine didn’t help.
The Globus Phoenix Dominator
@Happyhungryhippo
“Another car I’ve seen reviews for, it’s quite comfortable, sips petrol considering what it is, and fast.”
“I’m guessing there’s a “But” again?”
“Yup. It can’t quite decide what it is. Very plush and easy to drive, but it’s not at all sporty despite the speed it can pull. And the styling is a bit too anachronistic.”
VERDICT: out of the running
This one was hard, because it’s a pretty good car in most ways, but the anachronisms just made it a bit hard to give a pass to. Good price, comfort, economy, and speed, but the second lowest sportiness and second loudest engine. Combine that with the styling that honestly feels more like a slightly disjointed modified car from the 70’s/80’s and it just wasn’t a compelling package overall.
The SVP Bearclaw 6.0 GT
@abg7
“Oh man, some proper yank muscle too!”
“Yeah, I’ve seen the reviews for this one though. Pretty good sportiness and decent comfort, a nice quiet engine, but it drinks like a punter at the Melbourne Cup.”
“Yeah, and it looks a bit funky, think we’ll pass on this one.”
VERDICT: out of the running
Same story as the Globus really, just with different strengths. Overall decent stats let down by a pretty funky looking car.
The FMC Contester “Five-Six” (Widebody)
@Lanson
“More yank muscle?”
“Yeah mate, they did pretty well with their pitch too, offered a villain car that looks bloody sinister.”
“Phwoah, and they even modified it themselves to look beefier, yeah that’s pretty damn sick.”
VERDICT: through to round 2
The Valiant Talon LT-ram package
@mart1n2005
“Super 90’s looking yankmobile, but damn if it isn’t a cool car.”
“Yeah it looks pretty dated, but considering the rarity it could be believable.”
“Plus I’m sure management won’t mind if I buy it off the ABC after production wraps!”
VERDICT: through to round two
The Arlington Archprince ASC-300
@Texaslav
“Massive yank tank that looks every bit as American as it is, but it’s mean.”
“Yeah mate, bloody comfortable too.”
“Rest of the car maybe doesn’t quite live up to its looks, but it’s mean enough that we can ignore that for now.”
VERDICT: through to round two
The Wraith Montezuma
@Knugcab
“Shit mate, if we were making something more like Morse this’d be great.”
“Yeah, but we’re not.”
“Exactly, so all that comfort doesn’t mean anything.”
VERDICT: doesn't make it through
I honestly really like this, but that’s more because I’m a sucker for this era of luxo barges than anything. Like I said earlier, this is like Morse’s Jag, cool, but not the vibe this show is going for.
A bit of a shame too, the stats are good. Solid price, bad sportiness, but the best comfort of the field BY FAR. Also the only FWD car submitted, yet it still has a V8!
The Swanson 437SC
@Ludvig
“Another weird little Euro.”
“Yup, but it’s a fun one!”
“Yeah nah that’s true, a real looker too from this pic.”
VERDICT: through to round two
Going through to round two is @Mikonp7, @conan, @GassTiresandOil, @Lanson, @mart1n2005, @Texaslav and @Ludvig.
The next judging round will be posted early next year, see you all after I throw more fans in my computer to stop it melting when I try take photos for that round!
8 Likes
By “funky” I think you mean “too much of a retro pastiche”. In retrospect, I should have dialed back on the retro, and installed a quad-cam 32v V8 of similar output, but with superior economy.
Sort of? It’s more that the front and back are almost pure right angles while the rest of the car is quite flowing, and the massive haunches combined with the quite aggressive upsweep on the rear bumper make it look like its been pre-rear ended. The car itself doesn’t really look any worse than the rest of the field outside of that, but it’s just a bit of a disjointed feeling design.
I knew I pulled a wildcard, so I am honestly positively surprised by getting such a good review in the end. 
I was a bit inspired by Cadillacs of the era technically, hence the somewhat uncommon FWD V8 layout.
Heyyy… ill take 2040 lol.
I swear it wasnt supposed to have that oversteer warning tho😒
To me, the best price to pay for hard work is high stakes. If a person earns 40k, and works for 400k, this is unfair and unright. Crinching is a new trend of digital slavery of the 21st century. Be carefull - do not overworking.
You may be right. The generally rectangular fixtures that make up the main styling features (upper grille/headlights, taillights/license plate holder and lower grille/fog lights) are out of step with the flowing curves of the body I chose, especially after I manipulated the morphs the way I did for my entry.
This is exactly the sort of thing I wanted to do with my QFC13 entry a while ago, but done better.
I see why it didn’t work in this competition, but it’s otherwise a very cool design!
2 Likes
Yeah, should’ve seen that coming, lol. Fair play. Didn’t think about that it was on the Wrangler body, and so despite being a convertible, it’d still be an SUV. Good luck to the rest of the field!
I honestly thought my car looked bland as hell compared to the competition…so a concept from 2040 is pretty cool😎
Holy zombie thread. I thought my boomer lampooning was long forgotten.
That really does look like a slightly warmed over copy-pasta though. Not that I have never recycled an entry 
Ill admit it, I did just happen to be working on this car as this challenge hit, and I will also admit that I didnt really look at the stats. I am glad that I now have a bit of lore to go on, with the reviews saying its expensive, loud and uncomfortable, itll be perfect for the wiki. Dont worry, the next gen of the Callamester is a soulless sedan
Judging round 2
Undisclosed location that totally isn’t the ABC studio carpark, Australia
David and John have gathered their 7 shortlisted cars for driving, camera, and audio tests. They’re joined by lead actor Jacob Braithwaite, and Casandra Briggs, who plays his love interest in the show (and is a massive car nut).
David and John will be leaving production related notes, while Jacob will be leaving notes on style and Casandra will be handling the driving aspects, all of which will be sent to ABC head office for them to make a final choice.
The Basilio GT6
David: Not the most comfortable of cars, but the great fuel economy and cost look good on the balance sheet and the quiet engine is a dream for the audio team.
Jacob: Slightly odd quirky European looks, still something I could see myself driving around in. Looks a touch dated, but is still appealing.
Cas: Unbelievably easy to drive, let down a bit by its low power. You can feel that it’s the lightest car here but that doesn’t really translate that well. Still accelerates quite well and has a decent top speed, though.
The Durendal Nighthawk
David: Great fuel economy, the same as the Basilio despite having a larger V8 that makes more power. Also remarkably quiet despite that, but the extra ~$5k for not a lot extra could be a hard sell to accounting.
Jacob: Great burly Aussie looks from the front, falls apart at the back, being too squinty with massive areas of not much happening.
Cas: Makes almost 60kW more than the Basilio, weighs about 200kg more, and drives… basically the same. Definitely a more comfortable place to be, and it’s FAST to 100, the fastest here, but is otherwise largely the same.
The Deer And Hunt SuperCoupe SuperRoad Convertible
David: Competitive price, average just about everywhere else. While being a convertible is a definite boon for the crew, the rather loud engine offsets that a fair amount. The bean counters will hate to hear that the drop top makes it have the highest cost to fix when something inevitably goes wrong on set.
Jacob: Quite easily one of the top two cars style wise, and could even pretty convincingly be called the best. Convertible is always cool, and it just looks like a mean, burly hero car, even if it is decidedly American.
Cas: You do hear a lot of the lovely exhaust note, but sadly being a convertible seems to hold it back more than anything. Second hardest car here to drive, among the least comfortable, and far and away the least nimble. It may work with movie magic but it’s not a believable crook chaser.
The FMC Contester “Five-Six” (Widebody)
David: Solid car modified by the manufacturer, their pitch even includes a villain car! With alright comfort, an engine a bit on the noisy side, not a massive amount of space for kit, and the second highest price, it’s really a bunch of averages saved by better than expected fuel economy. Acquisitions is probably going to shit themselves when they find out how much the 305 tyres cost to replace!
Jacob: Very slick looks, but they look a bit too much like a mass produced “modified” car. Definitely cool, but lacking the showy-ness you’d expect from a modified car.
Cas: VERY quick, fastest in a straight line even. However the big power lead over everything else means it’ll shred those big expensive tyres, and the tyres themselves make it the hardest car here to drive. Impressively nimble despite all that, though.
The Valiant Talon LT-ram package
David: Rather competitive pricing can’t help the average fuel economy and least comfortable ride here. Engine noise is decent, however, and it’s not too bad to fit kit in once you squeeze in.
Jacob: Pretty easily the most dated looking car here, but it absolutely oozes performance and cool. Some kind of odd looks around the back notwithstanding, it’s the sort of thing you could see a junior detective buying to project cool on a bit of a budget.
Cas: Quite easily tied for the most nimble car here, the rough ride can be off-putting but the car’s still easy to drive and about mid pack in terms of speed.
The Arlington Archprince ASC-300
David: The most expensive car here and also the most comfortable by a huge margin. Its yank barge ways means there’s a ton of room for equipment inside, and while it’s unexpectedly economical it still reminds you it’s American by being a bit too loud.
Jacob: Very burly and menacing looks, but the overwhelming size does detract a bit from it. Looks are extremely American and maybe not to Australian tastes, but that could help export the show.
Cas: One of the slower cars here, but still not at all slow. Very American driving manner, with a very good amount of power, not much in the way of nimbleness, relative ease to drive (although surprisingly low compared to some of the other cars) and unbelievable comfort for this class of sports sedan.
The Swanson 437SC
David: The other quirky Euro, price is the upper end of the middle of the pack, and the economy is great. While there’s a decent amount of room for kit, the boxer’s an absolute screamer, this is the loudest car here. The odd proportions would need careful camerawork to not look strange.
Jacob: Strange proportions, dated looks, yet somehow it’s still quite cool. The back looks extremely wide, especially compared to the front, but it’s all a sweet, harmonious look still.
Cas: Up there with the Valiant for nimbleness, and up there with the Basilio for driving ease, the middling comfort puts a dampener on an otherwise great car. The screaming B6 doesn’t help, but it’s also one of the fastest accelerating cars here, even if it’s also one of the slowest once it’s up to speed.
After sending their comments off to ABC management, and an excruciating wait that could only be borne of government department bureaucracy, the car eventually selected for The Pair was…
The Valiant Talon LT-ram package!
Big congrats to @mart1n2005, while the comfort was low everything else was good enough that the healthy dose of coolness was more than enough to offset it.
As far as the rest of the field goes, it’s:
1 @mart1n2005
2 @conan
3 @GassTiresandOil
4 @Texaslav
5 @Lanson
6 @Mikonp7
7 @Ludvig
Thanks for a fun challenge, and hopefully I've done alright for my first time having to care about stats, even if there was the silly catch-all of coolness as a top priority!
7 Likes
That’s something I wasn’t expecting - an early 2000s facelift of a 1990s American pony car (aero looks and all) taking top honors against a field of newer mid-2000s machinery (including a few imports).
@mart1n2005 I’m familiar with the 1995-2002 Valiant Talon - I recognize it from CSR149, where it had a different color scheme acquitted itself well by all accounts (although sadly not by enough to become a finalist back then). As for the version you submitted for TMCC23, I guess the low comfort levels (relative to the other finalists) were an acceptable trade-off given how much fun it was to drive (decent straight-line pace and excellent handling, according to the client). I still wonder why it was the least comfortable car in the final seven - was the suspension set up to be on the firm side, and did it use a live rear axle (as did its inspiration, the fourth generation GM F-Body pony cars)? Or was it equipped with only a standard interior and/or CD player? Or was it a combination of those factors? Anyway, it seems only right that the Valiant Talon’s day in the sun has finally come.
1 Like