The 2023 Trafikjournalen 24h of clunkers - (END OF RACE!)

[Sealboi]

aight first time doing this so i prolly messed up somewhere

Team RCKET

The people:

A group of highschool friends

“Mechanic” Anders Andersson

Age: 26

DOB: 16th of June, 1997

POB: Malmö, Sweden

Likes:

Dislikes: 10mm sockets, fixing modern cars, social media

Place in team: Picking, building and fixing the Marvel of Swedish Engineering™, He drives (slower than Karl)

“Engineer” Peter Peterson

Age: 27

DOB: January 21st, 1996

POB: Tyringe, Sweden

Likes: Anything Swedish

Dislikes: Solidworks

Place in team: Designing solutions to make the Marvel of Swedish Engineering™ a “safe” and not horrible race car, helping build the Marvel of Swedish Engineering™, race strategy

“Racist” Karl Karlson

Age: 28

DOB: April 20th, 1995

POB: Bjärshög, Sweden

Likes: Driving, RWD cars, Ryan Gosling movies.

Dislikes: Slow cars, Peugeots, Cheese pizza

Place in team: He drives (and sometimes helps fix the Marvel of Swedish Engineering™)

“Malmö enthusiast” Mohammad Mohammadson

Age: 28

DOB: May 12th, 1995

POB: Mashhad, Iran

Likes: Banana on pizza

Dislikes: Taxes

Place in team: Team boss, He also drives (if necessary)

The shitbox:

The Hamocars DB-R aka “Bricklet” (from the less-than-aerodynamic shape of the body) is a Marvel of Swedish Engineering™.

This particular example was manufactured in 1986 in Göteborg, a bit rusty around the edges due to almost 40 years of constant use around cities. Powered by a quite torquey 2.4 liter I4 that’s seen it’s best years, though it’s still running (somewhat) strong.

The car is known for its excellent safety, reliability and being turned into “tractors” by 16 year olds.

Once owned by an older gentleman, who did 283,406km in the 37 years he owned the car, it is now ready to race and put its famed sturdiness to the test.

(lore & car done together with a certain Smons)

[Knugcab]

OK.

24h warning (no pun intended) should have been done a long time ago.

Not going to deep into things, but to put it this way, things happened in the last few days and my life is a mixture of deep shit and better than ever. Hence, I don’t really have the time to look through who has sent things in - you have to keep track of that yourself now, I hope that is OK.

Also, it means that you will have SOME leeway with team presentations etc. - I still want the car files submitted in time, but if you’re some hours late with your presentations - eh, who cares, I will need some time before I can start on this unfortunately.

This doesn’t mean the end of this challenge and probably not extreme delays either, especially not when it have taken off - I just got a little bit more on my hands than planned, for the better and for the worse. Just see it as lots of time for pre-race RP.

[Happyhungryhippo]

05.01.2024, 11:48 AM

ARE WE ALREAD THE-ERE??

Argh crap, I should have ordered this car with an ejection seat. But yes, FINALLY we made it. How about saying thank you to your daddy who drove all day and night? Here it is. We are late, crap.

Seems it hasn´t started yet, Mr. Nilfert.

Oh Jan, you don´t say? Yeah, true, maybe the orga team has been held up or so. Let´s find a place to park. And I need to change the spark plugs, the Advance didn´t run like it should. I told Chantal like a 100 times how to do it. And guess what? The parts I bought her are still unopened in the glovebox.

Mr. Nilfert, all these cars have their interior stripped.

Yep, Jan, thats what we will also do now as we have time left. WE ALL, YOU HEARD THAT, CHANTAL JOLINA NILFERT???

three hours later

You see, Jan, this is why I did not bring camping stools, we now have some car seats left to use. Now the spark plugs. Can you tell me how you see that these are worn?

Actually, no, sir.

You are working at a nursing home so I`ll let that slide. I bet I will be soon needing your knowledge. Chantal, can you tell me? Eeeeh! Where is she? She was there some minutes ago? Jan, where is my useless daughter?

Well, Mr. Nilfert, when you had your swearing monologue, she told me that she wants to make a TikTok video with an elk.

(dropping tools) You´re kidding me?

Eh, I wish I would, but just look over there…

AAAAAAARRRRRGGGGGGHHHHH WHY DID I AGREE TO TAKE PART IN THIS CIRCUS???

[Djadania]

The following post and entry are by ChatGPT. Team GreenSpeed Racing hopes to be accepted as a 2nd entry made entirely by ChatGPT.

Once upon a time in the quirky world of automotive oddities, there lived an eccentric engineer named Dr. Ignatius Greenthrottle. Dr. Greenthrottle, renowned for his peculiar taste in color and a penchant for speed, embarked on a wild mission to create the ultimate racing machine.

His creation, the “Velocity GreenRacer,” was a fusion of unconventional styling and unbridled horsepower. The car, painted in a shade of green that could make a leprechaun blush, became an instant sensation in the racing underworld.

Enter our trio of fearless racers – Alex “Speedster” Rodriguez, known for breaking the sound barrier on tricycles as a kid; Emily “TrackBlazer” Thompson, whose first words were reportedly “vroom-vroom”; and Marcus “ApexMaster” Walker, a former go-kart champion turned professional cheese sculptor.

The three drivers, each possessing a unique skill set and a shared love for all things absurd, found themselves drawn to the GreenSpeed Racing team. Driven by a mutual appreciation for the ludicrous, they formed an alliance to tackle the 24-hour Höljes track – a task deemed impossible by the saner members of the racing community.

Their preparation for the race involved a rigorous training regimen of competitive pancake flipping, synchronized dance routines, and perfecting the art of speaking in rhyming couplets. The team’s pit crew, known as the “Lugnut Lunatics,” were recruited from a local circus, ensuring that tire changes would include acrobatics and juggling.

As the Velocity GreenRacer rolled onto the track, spectators were left speechless, partly due to the blinding shade of green and partly due to the car’s unconventional aerodynamics, inspired by a paper airplane design from Dr. Greenthrottle’s childhood.

The race unfolded with a series of comical mishaps, including a seagull stealing one of the Lugnut Lunatics’ juggling balls, Marcus attempting to sculpt a cheese masterpiece during a pit stop, and Emily challenging the race commentator to a breakdance duel.

Despite the laughter and chaos, the GreenSpeed Racing team demonstrated remarkable resilience and skill, navigating the twists and turns of the Höljes track with surprising precision. The Velocity GreenRacer, adorned with its flamboyant green hue, zoomed across the track, leaving a trail of absurdity in its wake.

And so, the legend of GreenSpeed Racing continued, with their peculiar antics and unorthodox approach making them a beloved fixture in the world of racing. As for Dr. Ignatius Greenthrottle, he retired to a tropical island, where he spent his days perfecting the art of coconut racing and dreaming of even greener pastures.

24h_-ChatGPT-_Velocity_GreenRacer.car|attachment (38.0 KB)

[Djadania]

Oh yeah, if allowed, can ChatGPT have number 77?

[Mythrin]

TEAM BAKEWELL BAGUETTE

Part 0 : Give Me a Break

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Connor and Mandy pull into a side turn just off of a motorway truckstop

Mandy: ''So this is where J said to meet him? ‘’ Mandy said opening the door of their rental Salon Amigo.

Connor: ‘‘Supposedly so, look he’s sharing his location with me live’’ Connor spun his phone around to Mandy’s view

Mandy: ''I can’t believe we’re doing this again, it’s been three years since the last one, and we finished last!"

Connor: ‘‘Second to last actually’’

Mandy: ‘‘Whatever it was still a poor bloody performance, I’d never thought 24 hours could take so long’’ Mandy ushered at Connor who was staring at Johnny’s blip on the map ‘‘and besides, I still can’t believe that we let Johnny pick the car again, that J.E.S.A was a dog egg wrapped in blue paint’’

Connor: ‘‘yes I know…’’ he said still staring at his phone

Johhny approached from around the bend of the road gesticulating towards a jauntily parked estate car

Mandy: ‘‘Oh for fucks sake’’

Connor: ‘‘My grandad used to have one of those I sure of it’’

Mandy: ‘‘Connor… it’s bright blue and from the 70’s again isn’t it’’ Mandy stared at the car in a blended state of laughter, exasperation and bewilderment

Connor: ‘‘Wait it’s not the same car again is it?’’

Mandy turned to her friend

Mandy: ‘‘No it isn’t, but it’s the same type of car… obscure, European family car that looks rough as 100-grit’’

Mandy and Connor began walking quickly towards the vehicle

Johnny: “Right before you two start shouting at me” Johnny said frantically skipping infront of his approachers ‘‘It’s actually suprisingly solid underneath and it goes very well’’

Mandy: ‘‘Johnny, if this has got the fourteen-hundred engine… I’m going to skin you’’ she brandished her fist in a semi-humorous way

---

THE CAR

Ferdon 318 GTS - Break 5 Vitesse

The car itself is a 1980 Ferdon 318 estate or break as the french called it. The 318 was a strong car in its day and was a dependable family car. This particular model is a GTS…

---

Mandy: ‘‘Why does it say GTL on the boot John’’ Mandy said scornfully

Johnny: ‘‘It’s actually a GTS it just got a replacement boot lid and door … it’s even the high output model with 92 alledged horsepower’’

Connor: ‘‘What’s that on the grille?’’

Johnny: ‘‘Period correct cold-climate wind shroud that is’’ he said smuggly banging the bonnet of the car, as a mass of brown rusty dust fell from the undertray

Mandy: ‘‘Christ almighty…’’

---

… as I was saying, the GTS model, and particularly the GTS models made from 1980-1983 had 92hp from their 1657cc OHV inline 4’s. The engine was particularly refined for the age and sent power longitudinally to the front wheels, through as noted, via a 5 speed transmission.

Johnny had purchased this 318 from a French car garagiste and salvager named Gunter who had been using the car daily as a yard workhorse, ferrying parts around and towing trailers. Johnny had been assured that while this car had been abused the little Ferdon had been fastidiously maintained and preserved to the highest standard (see below).

Summary of Cars Condition

Regardless of whether Johnny had assumed the car was in good condition, it was not in the tidiest of states. Apart from the visual rust and body panel damage the Ferdon was starting to show signs of it’s age and years of usage. The blue velour interior was largely torn, scuffed, damaged and stained and despite the high-tide mark of sprayed on tar up the side of the car, deep rooted rust within the door sills was starting to burst through.

Replacement boot, rear seats, LH rear door from a red 318 GTL

Bent, twisted bumpers and wing panels

Smashed headlight

Slightly blowing exhaust

Trouble hot starting, though the engine is pulling strongly

Engine fan seems to come on quickly once car is stationary

CB radio fitted

Rust holes appearing on the chassis and bubbling under the new paint

Body panels, though original and steel were starting to rust and paint was beginning to thin and crack with age and extreme temperature.

Cheap make PhuKing Chinese tyres on all four rusted wheels

Window rubbers going damp and mossy

Maintenance manual and booby magazine left in glove box.

Now fitted with racing numbers.

---

The Team Members

Mandy Carter - 27 years old : Mandy was born with petrol in her blood her parents married after a successful showing in some mythical 90s trans-European street race. Having mostly recovered from a poor showing at the 2020 TrafikJournalen24HR. and after having taken a step back from the crazy racing post Covid she has now been dragged on by Johnny to Sweden for the 2023 TrafikJournalen 24HR race again to hopefully regain some of the spark she lost.

Connor Johnson - 28 years old : Connor has been a life long childhood friend of Mandy, he’s now quit his awful teaching job to run accounts for the track driving school that Johhny and Mandy set up with the inheritance left to them by their grandmother. Connor isn’t really a driver but has come to appreciate the metal that has transported him his whole life, and has become even more handy at the wheel since particularly since America.

Johnny Carter - 25 years old : Johnny is Mandy’s younger kid brother, he’s a bit of an excitable idiot but he’s taken on a more mature streak since the last 24HR race, and has brushed up on his mechanical sympathy and knowledge. While being more level headed in the past years, Johnny doesn’t always make the right decision… this one, well, we’ll have to wait and see.

---

[Knugcab]

OK, in case anyone is wondering…

Yes, I allowed Djadania (after some doubt) to enter a second entry ran by Chat GPT, just because it could be an interesting thing to check out how hilariously bad it will become. I hope you all can see it as more of an experiment than something else. In case it (what a horrible thought) wins, the winner won’t be Djadania, but Chat GPT. I know it might be controversial, but well, it will probably mostly be for shits and giggles anyway knowing how worthless Chat GPT seems to be at Automation. I guess it will give him more of a headache than anything, too.

[Texaslav]

Team #66: The Comedians’ Clique

Synopsis (too sleepy for a proper chapter, will do one later)

Five close, US-based friends in the comedy business are on an informal holiday getaway in Europe, having previously worked the continent during and following the Oktoberfest season. After finishing up with mountain skiing somewhere in Finland, they enter the Clunker challenge as a “fuck it, why not” thing.

Melvin "Mel" Banks

The founder of the feast, Mel, is a gentle giant, standing at a staggering 7 foot tall. Prior to settling as a comedy guy, he’s been everything from a carpenter to a columnist to a soldier, with his excuse for jumping careers usually being “didn’t feel like it anymore” or “got told I could make more somewhere else”. This has led to Mel accumulating countless stories from the many places he’s been to incorporate into his comedy.

Now a successful performer known for his effortless delivery and a nonchalance that is comical in and of itself, Mel - now in his mid-30s - has slowed down and even found love. To him, the whole Europe thing is the last thing he does in the company of his Clique, resolving to put family first thereafter. He’ll be on pit duty, because his frame enables him to haul shit easily.

James "Jim" Wall

Also known as “Brick Wall” due to how he basically becomes deaf when drunk. The only member of the friend group who’s older than Mel - by a year - but not nearly as settled-down and fatherly. A known party animal, which is where most of his material comes from, and very well-tenured in comparison to the others.

Sometimes, one might get the idea that Jim has stories that he isn’t willing to tell. They are probably dark and heartbreaking He’ll be driving… If they can keep him clean long enough.

Michael "Mike" Hansen

One of the younger guys in the group; an obvious rising star, he not only has wild shit to say but also plays a great roguish character that makes him easy to like. Hopeless womanizer. Kind of co-founded the group with Mel, and would have gone flat nowhere without him due to being terrible at managing himself and his funds.

Mike has a known mean side, being verrry far from nice to people who don’t easily mesh with him, and is quick to a fight even if he can’t be sure of finishing it. He’ll be driving… Try not to “not mesh” with him.

John "Jack" Hunter

Lop a foot o’height and a decade o’age off Mel, add better work ethic, and you get Jack. New to this whole comedy thing, he’s gotten a boost by befriending the Clique and thus being able to run outreach like someone more established. Far from a pure bias baby, though, Jack is an excellent comedian, with a particular aptitude for impersonations.

The only member of the group who doesn’t party hard at all, being an avowed non-drinker. This also fuels a somewhat ‘snobby’ on-stage persona. He’ll be managing race prep and helping Mel out in the pit.

Shane "Kid" Whitmer

If Jack’s a mini-Mel, Shane is a mini-Jim. Rowdy, outgoing almost to the point of aggression and naturally talented at his craft, this kid is a plane crash in slow motion. It’s been suggested he’s mainly in the group because of his extreme-lightweight antics; it’s also been suggested that him sober and drunk on stage are totally different experiences, though both are equally enjoyable.

Will be driving, oh God help us all.

---

This is a 1993 Arlington Antares, a front-drive American midsize with a torquey V6. Far from in pristine condition. Due to its “one headlight stuck shut, the other ripped open” situation, the Clique has decided on a very compassionate, level-headed, mature name: The One-Eyed Monster.

[Elizipeazie]

Need a collab with Mel xD

another resident giant in the pit lane is reason enough

[MoteurMourmin]

Team #88: The Wannabe Streetracers

Synopsis

Just recently out of high school and armed with a lack of foresight and a 1985 Hikaru Katana BCT V5, they set their sights on the world wide web, looking for a possible blazing start for their streetracing careers. And there it was, like a beacon in the distance, the 24 Hours of Clunkers. They already had a shoddy old car, already mostly rusted away from its life in their seaside town, and all that they’d need to do would be modify it for the race.

The Drivers

(Using Japanese naming order - last name, first name)

Aisaka Yusaku - Yusakun

AGE - 18

Gifted with the dichotomy of an incredibly strange facial construction that leads him to constantly look like he’s about to commit heinous felonies and a surprisingly kind personality, Aisaka acts as the wild card of the group. A valuable asset in intimidation, Aisaka also possessses a uniquely strong ability to judge where corners are before they’re in sight. Whether that’s just him researching, we don’t know. The third most skilled driver.

Aoyama Misaki - Misa

AGE - 19

With a fiery personality and an even more aggressive style of driving, Misa takes no prisoners on or off of the course. Known as the Warhead of Iwate during Senior High, she took that fearsome reputation and brought it to the road, with her dangerous driving. As the second most skilled driver of the group, she normally is brought out when the stakes are high and taking risks is worth it to edge out a victory.

Tanabe Shinichirou - Shin-cchi

AGE - 19

Although he bears the least negative personality traits of the group, that isn’t where he shines. As the son of the infamous streetracer, Tanabe Aiko, who tore up the roads in Japan in the 90s, he was drstined to inherit his mother’s winning formula for racing. Known for being highly calculating and almost worryingly quiet, he is what you’d call a very precise driver. No action is taken without its merits and drawbacks being taken into account. With this in mind, he was able to gain fearsome skill, and become the number one driver of his group. He is also insecure about his overly large eyebrows and loves tea.

And the car:

A pre-trashed model.

The 1985 Hikaru Katana BCT V5, in remarkable condition on the surface, but bearing the ugky chassis of a car with no environmental resistance. Front wheel drive with sub-120HP and weighing in at around 800KGs, ut can throw itself around, but will the chassis take it? Probsbly not, but you’ll have to find out! Nickname: The White Comet of Iwate.

[Danicoptero]

#12 Team Let’s Get This Bread

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The Car

A third gen Tarquini Freccia, one of the vans ever. Made in 1993, it came stock with a 1.3L I4 making a nice 69hp. The engine has been upgraded to make 83hp, and some weight has been taken out.

For almost 15 years, this van was used as a work vehicle for a bakery. However, it has seen very little use in the last 5 years, and it even had the catalytic converter and the mufflers stolen at some point during this time.

It isn’t fast or nice to drive, but at least it’s cheap and has proven to be reliable over the years.

---

The Team

Antonio Hernández “El Abuelo” (65 y.o.):
A small but strong man. For most of his life, Antonio worked as a baker, but now that he has retired he wants to try things he never had the time for before. Dusting off his old work van, he’s taking the family to Sweden to enjoy some shitbox racing.

Juán Hernández “El Padre” (42 y.o.):
Antonio’s son and the current owner of the bakery. Juán grew up watching Carlos Sainz and Fernando Alonso, and dreamt of being a race driver and owning a Celica GT-Four. He never got his Celica, but thanks to his father, he now has the chance to acomplish one of his dreams, even if it’s on a shitty old van.

Elena Hernández “La Hija” (18 y.o.):
Antonio’s granddaughter. She’s a mechanical engineering student and the one that pitched the idea of taking part in this race to her granpa. Elena is part of her university’s Formula Student team, so she has some experience working with race cars. She also learned how to drive on the old Freccia, but she never really pushed it, so she’s not sure of how the shitbox will behave during the race.

[SheikhMansour]

THE SPY KIDS

It’s the Trafikjournalen 24 hour race, take two!

The Drivers

Jessica Lombaerts

Age: 19

Appearance: 170cm tall, dirty blonde/brunette hair, dresses exclusively for the beach, skate park, or nightclub.

Description: Half-Dutch, half mad. Her main job is to drive fast, and her car collection reflects that. Her other job is to smoke enough weed to asphyxiate an entire country, and as a result half of the colour and texture in her hair is actually hashish. Is also a hip hop dancer.

Vehicles: BMW M3 (E92), Suzuki Hayabusa, Alfa Romeo Giulia Quadrifoglio, Pagani Zonda F Clubsport

Shay Hirvonen

Age: 18

Appearance: 160cm, blonde hair, wears cottage-core outfits, winter sweaters, or androgynous clothes.

Description: Soft and cuddly on the outside, sharp and devious on the inside. Is better with her hands than anyone else on the team, and probably anyone else this side of the Olympics. When she’s not in soft-core mode, she will step on you, and you will like it. Can also shoot better than Alexis despite not being a committed militant.

Cars: Jaguar E-Type, Mercedes-Maybach S650 (with upgrades), VW Kombi (with upgrades), Bugatti Chiron

Lazar Kandyba

Age: 25

Appearance: 167cm, black hair, black beard, 80% normal clothes, 20% Soviet wear and Slav Squat tracksuits.

Description: Ukrainian, Khrushchevist, anti Stalin, anti modern Russia. Much vodka consumption, almost as much sunflower seed consumption. Switched from tobacco to cannabis to alleviate lung problems actually caused by living in Donetsk. Can haggle his way out of a Rolls-Royce dealership. Knows Krav Maga, Muay Thai, and AK47.

Cars (all upgraded): Lada Niva, Nissan Stagea, Mitsubishi Evo VIII, Volvo 850

Petra Kennedy

Age: 17

Appearance: 155cm, blonde, half cottagecore, half band shirts

Description: You think Jessica’s mad? Petra is the closest thing you will find to a mad scientist this side of an interdimensional portal. She is a pyromaniac, complete with a collection of explosives and various other flammable items, and once blew up several rooms of her school. As such, she is on several lists. She also has an entire room dedicated to Minecraft merchandise, and can shoot a target as well as Shay, which serves her well when she does her, ahem, pest control job.

Car: VW ID3 Pro S

Shay’s Teenage Pit Crew

Lauren Darabay

Age: 19

Appearance: 163cm, dark brown hair, dresses like an architect

Description: The bad cop to Shay’s good cop, she has no softcore mode and will just step on you. Resident piano player and yerba mate addict. (No, that one doesn’t have cocaine.) Is banned from eleven countries for political reasons, and will also not set foot in Northern Arkansas.

Megumi Tetsuya

Age: 17

Appearance: 155cm, Japanese-Canadian, sometimes looks like a painter, sometimes like a fashionista, always like she should be in Paris.

Description: What you see is largely what you get. Basically the one normal person in Spy Kids garage. Would’ve used the car as an art canvas, but the panels were too rusty to repaint the car.*

Lazar’s Muscle

Giorgi Ingorokva

Age: 23

Appearance: 191cm, green hair, boiler suits or designer fashion

Description: Amateur rugby player, professional flaming homosexual, wannabe rockstar. Runs a garage in Liverpool and a clothing store next door, though his residence is of uncertain legality. Played three matches for London Scottish.

The car

It’s another Rosewood! This time, however, it’s a Vicugna instead of a Bovinus. It has a viscous all wheel drive system (that doesn’t work), viscous differentials (that don’t work), severe underbody rust, and a fuel injection system that metres fuel by horoscope instead of a fuel map. Lazar’s also bolted a skidplate to the bottom because the cladding fell off. The 4.3L flat six theoretically produces 201 bhp, but that’s probably closer to 150 now. Still, the Bovinus was heavier and had a solid rear axle so this should at least be easier to drive.

[Knugcab]

Closed for new submissions, will check out if I need complementing stuff for the ones I got in a while.

[AndiD]

Team Oxracers II: The Return - Ep. 3: Rolling in - in style

Previous post

The Oxracers have arrived at the track on time and unloaded their luggage. Mary and Jane then take the car to the local supermarket (for people and cat supplies), the auto shop and hardware store (for car and repair supplies) and the printing shop (for sticker supplies).

After their return, Jane and Michael set out to gut the Kando’s interior and install a rudimentary comms system, while Mary carefully places the printed stickers on the car.

They both finish at about the same time and step back, proudly beaming at their achievement. Corazon and Lucas join in to comment on their work.

Reflections on the livery

“Why do we still have different numbers on each side? Again, 42 on the Outside Xbox side and 47 on the Outside Xtra side? Last year that useless print shop made an error, but this year?” wonders Michael.

Mary shrugs. “I found it to be a cool idea, and not that anyone here cared. Plus, it shows that we are two teams that run as one.”

“Great, Ancient Dragon Lansseax - he ruined my 2023 Christmas challenge”, mutters Lucas as he sees the new sticker for the hood. “And how nice of you to put the L next to me this time.” He makes a fake pout.

“Arrgghh, this looks good”, comments Corazon in his best pirate voice, seeing the pirate skull next to his name.

“So, are we ready to race?” asks Jane rhetorically.

“We have done it before, so we all know what to do”, mutters Michael.

“I don’t, sort of - I mean, I didn’t drive last year, but want to this year.” Mary proudly points that she put her name next to the others on the car as well. “How hard can it be?” she adds after a short while.

“That was a different show”, comments Michael. “But yeah, let’s see how things go. Good thing this sequel here has multi-class now, so you can be a COMPETITOR in addition to being the LINCHPIN.”

“Oh, no did they still keep this TTRPG crap in the sequel”, complains Corazon. “I just want my achievements, dammit. And the victory, of course.”

“It’s optional now, and imported from our save from last year, so we don’t need to roll on anything”, explains Jane.

“The GM will still do rolls, but we don’t have to”, adds Michael. “But we still get experience and can level up.”

On a whim, Corazon triggers his personalised level up visual and sound effects and earns disapproving looks from all the others.

“Well, time for me to go see what the other teams are doing?” Mary vanishes behind the Kando, places her hands over her head, spins around and emerges again as a white cat with black spots, ready to sneak around the track and inconspicuously spy on the other teams.

FOR EVERYONE: FEEL FREE TO INCLUDE MARY-AS-CAT IN YOUR PRE-RACE RP POSTS. If she only does cat stuff, no need to clear that with me.

[Restomod]

Can I take number 0?

[DaBoss4344]

Entrant Details:
Running under the name: The Smith Brothers
No. 43

The Drivers

• Jonas Smith (29M)
  
  Born and raised in Brooklyn with his 2 brothers. Jonas was always at avid racing fan at a young age, he vividly remembers growing up through the V10 and V8 eras of Formula 1. If it had wheels and raced, he loved it, no matter what. So when he was offered the opportunity to enter the 2023 Trafikjournalen 24h of clunkers, he jumped at the opportunity, wanting to feel the rush in his own car, instead of on the sidelines. However, when he realized that he didn’t exactly want to race his BMW M4 in the dirt of Höljes, and that it was completely illegal to race anyway. He enlisted the help of 2 of his brothers. Edward, and Roy, who were tasked with the role of finding the cheapest car possible. Whilst 2 of them weren’t the best drivers, he was hopeful on the fact that Edward and Roy could find a reliable car for that was legal to race.

• Edward Smith (26M)
  
  An avid car fan, Edward took trade at a mechanics shop soon after leaving school, he knows the ins and outs of a lot of cars and dreamed of building and racing his own kit car. However, he has to settle for cheap damaged car to race alongside his 2 brothers in the 2023 Trafikjournalen 24h of clunkers. Alongside Roy, they managed to find a car that was good value, however had a few minor issues with it, but with the little money they had to work with, they couldn’t repair much, except strip out the interior and re-do it, in the hopes of using this car as a rideshare or taxi service, with the added popularity of it being a “race winning car”. He is also the teams lead mechanic and engineer when not driving. (For obvious reasons)

• Roy Smith (23M)
  
  An arrogant young pro-am sim-racing driver, he always centered the world around himself, and when he left all the car searching work to Edward, he immediately started practicing endurance racing. What he failed to realize is that endurance racing might just be a team sport, and it is going to be impossible to win without the help of his brothers. Despite this small hurdle to overcome, there is no doubt he will try to push the car to its limit, all for the chance to win this race. And if you ask him, this was all his idea, the car, the name, everything.

The Car

Whilst searching countless scrapyards, Edward found something that peaked his interest. A rusty Ford Crown Vic NY Taxi sitting in the corner of the yard, and for a good price too. Despite its age Edward knew these things were built to last, being used in both taxis and police cars. But to his surprise, when he popped open the hood, he saw a (presumed) freshly swapped 1.3L i4 instead of the standard 4.6L V8.

Whilst still confused, he was able to use this, and many other faults with the car, to get it for a much cheaper price than normal. Complaining that the car would now be underpowered and “lost its charm and history.” to which the person running the yard responded, “Yeah whatever knock yourself out, have it for less.” Seems like he didn’t really need to go through all that effort. When he brought it back to the shop, he slapped a Trafikjournalen bumper sticker on it and put on some (definitely registered) plates, they had to be “Elite” according to Roy.

He blocked off the shattered headlight, and put a makeshift headlamp ontop. Passing the 2 headlight regulation.

With that, that car was ready to race.

The Car Specs (Text Block Warning)

The car boasts a 1.3L Overhead Cam cast iron engine, equipped with VVL and running 10.8:1 compression. Redlining at 6k RPM and VVL kicking in at 4.8K. Completely naturally aspirated and equipped with Single Point EFI this engine pulls a respectable 80.7hp and 78.8ft-lb of torque, with it topping out at roughly 200km/h. It runs smoothly without much issue (79.3 Reliability). The car runs a 4-speed automatic gearbox with RWD and an open diff. It runs P175/70R14 tyres both front and back. With rusted brake pads and calipers this car struggles for stopping power. (Fault 1, bad brakes) With both front vents boarded up with wood due to airflow issues. The engine is prone to overheating, not that it runs too hot to begin with. (Fault 2, No Cooling). The suspension in the car was tuned for comfort, as in a former life it was a taxi. However, years of travelling on damaged and bumpy NY roads have lead to them not supporting the cars weight, and sagging the car down to a low 232.2mm instead of the typical 256.3mm that was mentioned on the spec board inside the car. (Fault 3, bad suspension) The car also lacks power-steering, meaning the original hydraulic powered R&P steering is no longer. (Fault 4, no power-steering) The car also suffers from structural underbody rust. In testing, the car performed decently well, doing a decent lap on the track, a 1:08.48 (2:23.04 in Automation’s Cumulative time system)

[Fayeding_Spray]

Timeloss

Part Zero: Pre-Race and Prep.

Annotated Team Line-up for size comparisons and a visual

Zoya not pictured due to lacking accurate representation, but they are 6ft 8in, so 4in taller than Victoria.

“Just Remember, here we’re not as well known. Bets on, we’ll know one or two people. Tops.” Selena leans over the bench seat of the Kazrohn, Looking at Mirage, Victoria, Grayse, and Zoya seated on the empty floor of the Van. Selena places her hand on Ruuka’s shoulder - the one currently driving - as they pull off from the access road, into the pits of the Event.

The mishmash group finds a clear space, parking as they exit the Van. Zoya sticks their head in the driver side door, beginning to unscrew the front bench seat. Victoria and Grayse set up the Marquee before all but Zoya reconvene at the side of the Van.

Mirage pulls out a few pieces of paper, handing them to the others. “Right, we have a small bit of paper work, then we can get to probably mingling, see if we know anyone. We have an idea that one Giant’ll be here.” Grayse snatches the paper from Mirage as she leans on the Van. “So what, we have to denote who is and isn’t driving? Man, it’s on the fucking van.” The Catgirl gives a sigh, handing the paper over to Ruuka, “Like, I know it’s a thing to get rid of the Van, but did we really have to do this with all of us?” Victoria grabs Grayse by the waist, pulling her under her arm, “Only way Sel and Ruu could get time off work. Wynn wouldn’t give them clearance otherwise.” Grayse sighs and rolls her eyes.

<brief time later>

Victoria, Grayse, Selena and Zoya sit in and around the open side door of the Kazrohn, as Mirage and Ruuka walk through the opening of the Marquee. Ruuka sits down next to Selena, “Well, I’ve spotted at least one person I know by looks, with some people I swear I’ve seen in chats before. Don’t see anyone else I recognise, which is a bit a shame.” Selena cocks her head, “So no big cats and dogs?” “Not this time.” “Shame.”

<fin, open to colab>

[Knugcab]

OK, I have tried to gather your stuff now.

I have complete submissions from:
@WoodenPlankGames
@stm316
@Snarklz
@Madrias and @Elizipeazie
@HermannMatern
@Fayeding_Spray
@doot
@interior
@Sealboi
@Mythrin
@SCSI
@Texaslav
@SheikhMansour
@shibusu
@06DPA
@AndiD
@DaBoss4344
Some jerk called @Knugcab

I would like a description of the car’s condition from:
@SurrealCereal
@Maverick74
@Happyhungryhippo
@Djadania (for both your standard entry and the ChatGPT experiment, I will accept whatever shit ChatGPT comes up with but I might adjust it if it feels unrealistic, lol)

The condition can be sent to me via DM, it doesn’t have to be posted here.

I only have a car file, no presentations at all from
@Restomod

Please complete your entries as soon as possible, and if it’s me that has missed something, please correct me.

[WoodenPlankGames]

Transporttjäns (no, I’m not typing out that long ass name every time, I already regret it.)

Post 0: pre-race

The Erikssons aren’t the last to arrive, but they’re certainly not early either. The first to arrive is Elin, of course, with their entrant, the number 17, their trusty Caducus. Any observer will immediately guess as to how well prepared the team is - not at all. The van rides very high, courtesy of it’s factory suspension, and the hastily spray painted number 17 - uneven fade and all - which doesn’t even look like they bothered to use a stencil.

The rest of the party arrives shortly afterwards, piling out of Aatto’s Wagon. Aatto quickly runs over to Elin by the van, keen eyes spotting… Walkie talkies and duct tape.

“I’ve got duct tape to secure it, and some spare batteries for you!” Are the first words out of her mouth, followed quickly by a “Not even a hello?” from Elin.

The next to interrupt is Linnea - “It’s been 10 minutes since we left the office Elin, we only stopped to get the tape and the batteries. It’s not like you haven’t seen us in a month!” - and her change in tone is just as quick as her heel turn to speak to Aatto. “So, should I unload the spare parts from the van?” - “No, the weight will help settle the suspension. I’m sure the foam and blankets will be fine to make sure nothing breaks.”

The party pause for a moment, allowing Elin to affix the “radio” in the car, and for Sven to catch up - “What are you girls running for? As far as I can tell, we’re not even the last ones here, much less late to the show!”

The Family Banter continues, as a generally far too relaxed aura settles in their pit, Aatto slowly unloading tools from her car while the rest stand around chatting, much to her annoyance. However, whether anything else important will happen before race start is down to what the other teams want to do.

<Author’s note: I’m glad to have a nice chat with anyone interested - DM me here or on discord by the same name~>

[DaBoss4344]

Previous Posts:

Entrant Form

---

Part 0: The Drive

The brothers have just left the port after towing the car to be shipped to Europe, they are now heading to the airport

Roy: Hey, so I’ve been thinking about our driver lineup, and lets be honest, I’m the only one here who actually knows anything about racing. So the idea I have is,

He pulls out a crumpled piece of paper from his pocket, its a timesheet with 1 hour increments, he reads off all the hours…

Jonas: So your telling me, that you want to race 16 of the 24 hours!?

Edward: You do realise how dumb that sounds out loud right?

Roy: Well no, I’ve been training on my sim, I can run 5 hour races without breaking a sweat. So 16 with some breaks will be a piece of cake.

Jonas sighs No, a sim and a real race are completely different beasts, I know you have a direct drive wheel or whatever they are called and all that fancy gear, but fatigue sets in quicker when the car is pulling you along with it on the track, you may not pull much but you still can experience some G-forces.

Roy: Oh look at you and l your fancy terminililiogy, or however you say it. I am literally the only one here with racing experience… Edward interjects: Ehem, Sim-racing experience, Roy: Shut up… Anyway, as I was saying, as the only one with racing experience in this car, He shoots a dirty look at Edward I am the only one with actual knowledge on this, so leave the planning. To. Me.

Jonas: You know I’m registered as the Team Manager on the form, so I have to submit the time sheet, as well as handle other parts of the team.

Roy: WHAT, why did you leave the managing to ME!

Jonas: Don’t worry about it, you can’t be the marked as the Lead Driver and the Team Manager on the form. He smirked So let me do that managing and you do the driver, you’ll get to start and finish the race as the lead anyway, plus get slightly more hours in the car. And I’ll always touch base with you guys before making a decision.

Roy: Oh, wow, ok, thanks, I guess.

Edward: So, about the car Roy, I ran some preliminary checks on the performance before it got shipped off, it seems alright but there are some things I need to warn you about ok?

He proceeds to list off the cars faults. (Found in the car specs section of the Entrant post)

Roy: Geez, not good, any of them you can fix?

Edward: Not right now, but I’ll have another look once we are in Sweden with the car again, we will have time at the track. We are going to be a day early because of our long flight. Might be able to find a quick fix for that airflow issue, either that or that brake issue. Not sure if I can though, both require a full assembly rebuild with how old it is…

The team discusses other forms of strategy along the drive, such as pit stops, replacing parts, and finalizing the time sheet, nearly at the airport, ready for their 7 hour flight.