Correction made. I’ll still call it a tent, but now there’s only one.
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Campsite One (Team Oil Crisis)
March 4th, 2022
Jaduvira, Vira Province, Crugandr.
Local time: 8:10 Sun Time
Weather: Hot, Humid and breezy (It was a very pleasant kind of hot that the cold had been swapped for)
Orlan had successfully managed to run over Hillbilly Rollers’ tent with the car. Naturally this sparked some disapproval from Aedan.
“Why did you do that? Do you realise you nearly hit someone?”
“Yes, I know. I misjudged how close we were ok?”
Aedan let out an exasperated sigh.
“I warned you not to drive and what did you do? You ignored me. And when you ignore me shit hits the fan like the that time on Satlon V when you decided to shoot the tank of liquid alkanite and collapsed the bridge.”
Meanwhile, Marie from Hillbilly Rollers was shouting at them angrily they heard something along the lines of ‘Did you guys get your driver’s licence in a box of cornflakes.’
“Why’s she so angry?”
“Because you nearly ran her over. Just ignore her and please park the car properly?”
A metallic clink resonated through out the cabin as Marie threw a metal tent peg that bounced off the rear wheel of the Magistrate. Then just as she threw the tent over the car, Orlan threw the car in reverse and backed up with such gusto that the 4.5L V8 spun the rear wheel facing the Hillbilly Rollers van, covering the tent that had fallen off the car with soil thrown up from the tire. Then, Orlan put the car back into drive and pulled up again this time about 5 feet away from where the tent was standing.
“Sorry you had to witness that guys but she’s got a point.” said Andreas.
“Tell that to Orlan over here, he drives like he’s shitfaced when he’s tired.”
Then after this small fiasco, the guys set up their sleeping arrangements.
To Be Continued (like always) @Knugcab
(OOC: The previous post takes place a few minutes after this one.)
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Team Mravolinski-Chitco
Team info: 2022 Shitbox Rally - Out of This World! (Stage 0) - #30 by MrdjaNikolen
This is reply to last part
We got to Crugandr
Post describing our Stage 0 standings was somewhat accurate
Its true that interior and dogs still smelled like piss and its hard to argue with some not properly latched stuff singing their song while going on cobblestone road.
This doesnt take away from fact that Mrdja was still able to listen to music and, seeing this might be amusing to rest, said music choice was done with CB radio turned on.
Everyone tuned to that channel was able to listen to said music and not much speak from the team.
Some swerwing and bumping was heard from other teams during the journey.
Camp was where things started to get weird, mainly bcos of six-legged cats that joined few other teams. We had seen few on our shuffling through both our car and camp and saw that hosts were (unsurprizingly) familiar with creatures.
Both dogs and Chicota are familiar with fighting against something of this size, so they were ready to defend our team from them, but two things have arisen as conclusion:
-
They never came close enough to be a threat
-
Cats had joined several teams as was already noted. Some of teams with this (mis)fortune are rather standard individuals and yet, no fight was ever seen
TLDR: Seems these felines are friendly in nature and arent willing to hurt their “hosts”, who ever “hosts” would turn out to be.
(Note:
hosts is used for hosts of this adventure- Team Shift Happens
“hosts” are teams that got one of six-legged cats.
Besides Shift Happens, there are 6 other teams with this declaration.)
With this change noted, it was time to eat and sleep. Bike bed got new user, with bike being set on top of Pi, not that she ever complained about such situation.
Dogs had settled in cab and Chicota was positioned beside VerBanka on top of said cab, being closer to entrance in said space.
Last two werent willing to get to sleep just yet, choosing to discuss some stuff that may be an issue.
Namely, refreshing our food supplies and money usage
Thanks to the fact they can ask hosts whats humanly safe to eat and fact those can serve as convenient currency exchange point, there wasnt too much worrying.
And besides, it is possible to obtain the knowledge by picking safe-looking stuff and we have few skilled mechanics in team that could try to exchange services for local currency or goods, so relying on host team could be taken as point of last resort, although reliable one.
Still, although its perfectly fine to account for all possibilities, we dont need to worry about either of those things
yet
3 Likes
Team Shift Happens
Previous Chapters:
It’s Go Time! - Starting Party 6 PM
Boldly Going / Through the Rift / Arrival in Jaduvira - Stage 0
When the Hell are We!? - Stage 0 Campsite
Out of His Damn Mind - Stage 0 Campsite
(OOC Note: If anyone wants to put their post in a particular point in time, feel free. I’m only advancing the time because it’s relevant to my characters. If you would prefer to have an earlier moment with another team, please, do so. Likewise, if you want to have a later moment, please, do so. Remember that the nights run from 1 Moon to 10 Moon, and we’ll be up around 1 Sun for the next stage.)
5 Moon Local Time, Shitbox Rally Jaduvira Campground.
When everyone had gone to bed, tired from the days events, Kaylie had tried to get some sleep. But, with Jayde so close, she found it hard to sleep at all. She’d had more than her fair share of dreams in the past about a Leoni hero to sweep her off her feet and take her to bed, but never had the opportunity. Now she had all the opportunity, but she didn’t dare. It was one thing to do so in a dream, but Jayde was, for all intents and purposes, a complete stranger to her. So she laid there in the tent, not sleeping well at all. Sure, she’d get a few minutes here and there, always waking up the instant her dreams got intimate, the instant the Leoni’s face turned out to be Jayde’s.
With a sigh, she got out of their shared tent and stalked across the silent campground to the Bricksley. It was a luxury van, so surely the seats would make for a comfortable enough bed. She opened the driver’s door, turned the key on enough to have power, and rolled the rear windows down a few inches before turning the key back off. Closing the driver’s door quietly, Kaylie opened the driver’s side rear door, climbed up into the van, then closed the door.
Unfortunately, she closed it left handed, slamming the door rather loudly. With a grimace, she laid down across the rear bench, hoping that whoever heard the door slam wouldn’t figure out it was her fault.
Jayde, on the other hand, couldn’t sleep for much the same reason as Kaylie. Sure, he’d offered to share the tent with her because someone was going to end up sharing a tent, and he’d done so many times before with other people, but Kaylie was different. One, she was quite attractive, both in form and in personality, and two, she was the first who didn’t shy away from him when she saw his scars. Which, to be fair, was expected, considering she’d lost an arm to a mock battle, and he’d lost a leg and gotten a nasty scar on his face from an actual airship battle.
So, when she’d left the tent, Jayde knew immediately because he hadn’t been sleeping either. Faking it really good, perhaps, but wide awake, trying not to think of what could be, if only either one of them could find some courage and just ask. And, to be fair, they barely knew each other. Jayde recognized her name, but surely there were many tigers named Kaylie over the years. Queen Kaylie the Long-Sighted may have been an ancient queen who knew the future, but that didn’t make Kaylie Grayson the same Kaylie. With a sigh, he pulled out the ancient letter that had been left to him and read it again to himself.
11/13/120 AWM
Jayde Malradi,
Though we will never meet, know that you are not a forgotten hero, despite the amount of times you’ve relived bits of the past. You have another mission, one from me this time, a quest to guide and to guard a group of travelers. At 4:77 Sun on 18/7/3251 AWM, they will open a mirror to our world from theirs. Go through that mirror. Tell no one there of your mission. Join the team known as “Shift Happens” in this event of theirs, and protect all of the teams from harm. A great danger is waiting for them, a danger you have faced once before. A danger you must face again, to save them all from a grim fate.
A Friend in Time,
Queen Kaylie the Long-Sighted.
Jayde folded the letter back up and tucked it back into the pouch he’d been carrying it in, then laid back down with a sigh. This was going to be a long, long night.
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Campsite One (Team Oil Crisis)
March 4th, 2022
Jaduvira, Vira Province, Crugandr.
Local time: 2 Moon Time
Weather: Warm and breezy.
The night was quiet, that was except for the crickets and the occasional steam train whistle in the distance. In side the Magistrate, saying it was cramped was an understatement, especially with three people sharing one bed in a car that still had yet to cool down. No one could fall asleep thanks to the immense heat inside the Magistrate and it didn’t help that the windows were rolled down.
“Aedan?” Orlan whispered, “Do you have any ideas on how to make it colder in here?”
“Other than dumping a bucket of ice cold water all over myself or putting ice down my shirt, its beyond me.”
“What are you two whispering about?” The dark mass that was Pavel, asked.
“Orlan is asking me for tips on how cool to himself down.”
“You cant lie when I say its unpleasant to sleep here.”
Aedan sighed exasperatedly
“Could we just get some rest without nitpicking or complaining?”
Sighing, Pavel rolled onto his back. “It is impossibly hot in here, obviously its not going to be easy.”
“What’s stopping you from turning the engine over, and waking up the whole camp? That’s the only way the A/C is going to help us.”
“Well that’s that then, we are helpless.”
“Why don’t you cry about it?”
“I didn’t think of that. So now I will.”
Orlan rolled over to face away from them and feigned a sob.
“You aren’t fooling anyone, Ori.”
“Where’s my cat?” asked Pavel.
“Sleeping in the tent with K and Mal.”
Without much else to worry about the three fell silent, Until Aedan got an ear draped over his face.
“Could you get your ear out of my face?”
Orlan obeyed without protest.
“Thank you.”
With that the three lombaxes fell silent and one by one, drifted off to sleep and let their dreams take hold.
To Be Continued (like always)
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Team Slow
Part 1 Post Prologue- We’re in Crugandr.
(I missed the driving part)
Jaduvira, Crugandr, Campsite.
Time: 12:45PM Sun time.
After finally arriving at Crugandr, Matt goes and inspects the car for any breaking points, there is nothing broken on the car, and the hacked up 4WD is working well, especially on the bumpy Earth terrain, unfortunately the door hinge is slightly offset and misaligned now after slamming it so hard to get the car to shut up about the door being open, Matt re-aligns the door
John: Matt, why did you have to close that door so hard its actually slightly offset
Matt: The sensor was being shit,
John: Alright
Matt: You know that one tent we bought?
John: Yeah?
Matt: It goes on the roof. But the rack is in the way.
John: Just build around the rack as he sighs at the idea of building a tent on the top of a sedan
We get to work on building the tent around the roof rack, and get to work on planning, Who needs ladders when you can climb over the car, after trying to get all-terrains but the languages were very different. We did manage to get a set of A/T’s though.
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Team Mravolinski-Chitco
Team info: 2022 Shitbox Rally - Out of This World! (Stage 0) - #30 by MrdjaNikolen
This is reply to last part
** Go back to sleep, normie! **
Ah do i wish doing as stated in title of this post. But no, at some point during my reading through car magazine thats unlikely to ever be made, SOMEONE had slammed some distant door.
(Ofc we know IRL that slammer is Kaylie, who spent some time adjusting to her left hand, but still sometimes underestimates that prostethic’s power
It could be possible that we are parked in way where i could see Bricksley rocking from both freshly slammed door and Kaylie trying to make herself comfortable, but that was never implied.
Kaylie isnt gonna worry about me anyway…some other member of Slam Happens might decide to investigate, tho ).
Im not appreciative of high temperature night either, so i may decide thats gonna annoy me, mainly bcos of handy amount of sweat going in tandem with it.
This will hold true for remainder of journey, partially bcos days would be even worse scenario.
Happily i saw no mosquitoes yet, so thats a solid positive.
Suddenly, this bike seemed like good thing to bring along.
Somehow pulling both said bike off Pi and my own self from rear of Kontir, i had managed to mount the ass on seat.
Pedalling could start and also a painful remainder that i was much fitter about 5 years ago: driving a route i used to do routinely back then would likely result in very non-fluid drive now; shared consequence of getting 20ish kg more and said route including some solid altitude changes.
Happily this part of this country does seem flat, making my air-based cooling solution much easier and night seemed bright.
It was weird looking at two moons, but eh, this must be parallel universe for reason, right?
It all seems very nice so far, but after some undisclosed time riding, i heard a female-sounding shriek from nearby carriage bcos ofc i decided to get on road.
It was then i realized that i havent put any additional clothes on myself before going for a ride, which explained presence of local individual getting from said carriage towards myself.
“My daughter was greatly disturbed by your indecency. How do you explain yourself?”
“My bad for not grabbing out shorts, then. I would usually do that, but seems im not quite used to being here + im kinda sleepy if im honest. During such warm weather, im used to sleeping in short-sleeved T-shirt and some underwear; this hopefully explains my…clothing situation.”
“T-shirt? Shorts? What are you talking about?
Also, that whole “not used to being here” thing doesnt work with me.”
“T-shirt is what covers my upper part of body, sir. Shorts are just short pants of sorts and with same usage as well.”
I was about to explain how im here in travel, when his shriek-prone daughter stroke again.
He turned around to face this new reason
“Ah, what to say about you, weird creature, then? I fear you might taste fair bit of my sword.”
Creature, aka our Pi, replied:
“Lets hope that she isnt disgusted by sight or smell of corpses, then.
If not, i will ask my friend here (points at Mrdja) to notify rest of our team of my demise.
Koji kurac? (Serbian, Pronounced aproximately as Ko-yee q-ratz? has similar meaning as WTF.)”
Pi’s rear end was smelled by tow lizard, which caused her last sentence to be said. Lizard in question seemed to be happy about the action.
“Look, we really dont want to cause trouble with anyone…” of Mrdja was quickly interrupted by yet another shriek from daughter.
Another local that came seemed to had fair bit of beef with our “friend” so while they sorted that out, we were packing ourselves back to camp.
Only then, we realized there were in fact three of us.
“I got scared bcos my father and that guy started duelling with swords” third member explained, “and you said you have a team.”
“We are also certain that your father wouldnt be pleased with you going away with two strangers.”
“Someone had visited us?” Chicota decided to exit truck too.
“Yup. Somewhere in that general direction, her father has sword duel with another local. She got scared and took after us.”
“I will take care of it. She is going to lead me to duel, im gonna persuade involved in not getting more hurt etc.”
“IM HERE”
Both men looked at girl and Chicota, who continued.
“Dad, you swore of never picking fights in front of my sister. You know how sensitive she is to see someone getting hurt and you full well know she couldnt drive carriage home in case of you getting hurt.”
“Who is this guy?”
“I dont know…but my son he definitely isnt.”
Chicota had started to run away from confused bunch, hoping that confusion would break down the fight.
Some harsh words were exchanged, but it was decided to continue elsewhere, without daughters and “sons” breaking down the fight.
Chicota has rejoined our group, with bike already being on Pi and Mrdja already sleeping on bike bed.
He will talk about this with them tommorow.
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Machinas Con Passione’s Shitbox Adventures Episode 3 - The 60 MPH Conga Line.
Shitbox Rally Starting Party - 6 PM Local time.
And so, the time had come. The Shitbox Rally was set to begin. With the preparation of 0.5 people and the determination of 5, Machinas Con Passione would make their rally debut. Chad McChad had worked tirelessly on making last minute adjustments to the Aerodynamic Wedge-Shaped Beast, and had time to add one final change to the van. Using his boot and a blowtorch, Chad had made a perfectly square shaped hatch in the roof of the car, and had welded a makeshift handle onto it, to allow team members to peek out of the roof of the car in the event that something wacky and uncharacteristic were to happen to any of the 10 windows they had on the van. Either way, he was sure somebody would enjoy getting pelted with wind at 60 miles per.
Before departing into t h e v o i d, Giacomo decided a sendoff was in order, so he held up team Hillbilly Rollers to take a picture of the ragtag group on what would very likely be their last few sane moments together.
Shitbox Rally, Stage 0.
Alas, the hard work had been done for MCP, as the first stage was more of a leisurely tour of Crugandr. Although most teams would relish the opportunity to take the first stage easy and to take in the views of a world completely different to their own, the members of MCP came to a stark realization… Again. The fuel efficiency of the van was, surprisingly enough, nonexistent. The first refueling went by without incident, however, the second stop ruffled a few feathers, to say the least. Giacomo was the first to pipe up at this travesty. “Okay, so, you mean to tell me that using questionable methods to turn a normal v6 into a relatively powerful and unreliable beast is BAD for fuel efficiency? What madness is this?!”
“Well, at least we can stop for free. This time.” McChad was a bit miffed at the prospect of having to stop every hour for fuel, though he WAS the one responsible for the engine in the first place. Then again, the sacred words, “mo powa baby”, were too poignant to ignore this one time. Similarly annoyed was one Maria, who pulled Giacomo aside for a one on one.
M: “Guarda, Giacomo, da un italiano all’altro…” (Hey, Giacomo, one italian to another…)
G: “I siciliani non contano.” (Sicilians don’t count.)
A deep sigh.
M: “Sto cercando di essere gentile con te.” (I’m trying to be nice to you.)
“Che cosa? La Sicilia è completamente diversa dall’Italia continentale, è un complimento!” (What? Sicily is completely different from mainland Italy, it’s a complement!)
“Yeah yeah, Keep your compliment dick. Anyway, next time you get us a big thirsty engine, make it a V8. I hope you have some kind of bright idea to deal with stopping every 20 seconds.”
G: “Please, I’m a Scarfiotti! I always win in the end!”
M: “I’m sure not forgetting to breathe is a win at the end of the day for you.”
G: “Hey! I resent that. But if it’ll inflate my win streak…”
Another sigh.
M: “Right. Another win for the Scarfiottis. I literally come from a crime family and yet I feel like I’m being out-ego’d here.”
And thus, Team Machinas Con Passione climbed aboard the Aerodynamic Wedge Shaped Beast, ready to get things moving for the remainder of the stage, not noticing that they’d been joined by a six-legged friend.
After a few minutes, Maria asked to use the hatch. After Chad headbutted it open, and after Dr. Dover stitched him up, Maria climbed up and surveyed the vehicles around them. It looked like Team Oil Crisis were playing ping pong with other cars, that’ll go over well with the organizers.
And who’s in this fancy looking Daue-
Oh.
Maria quickly shut the hatch and acted like she had seen nothing.
“Maria, next time you need to close the hatch, let me do it. You caved in the cieling a bit.” Chad chided Maria for ruining his precious hour and a half of work. “Oh, sorry, I uh… Saw something.” Maria snuck another peek at the Dauer from the passenger window to confirm her suspicions. Were internationally wanted war criminals really allowed to just show up at rally raids? We really do live in strange times. “Oh, really? I just saw something rather interesting in the car myself. If you’ll look to your left.” Maria looked to her left and found herself staring face to face with a 6 legged… Cat? Thing? Creature? “Oh, cool. I’ve always liked- HUH?”
This drew the attention of Giacomo, who looked back to witness said catlike creature. “All good back there Mari- UAAAAAAAAAGH!”
As it turned out, Giacomo happened a distaste for cats. A very strong distaste. Thusly, he leapt from his seat, grabbed the catlike creature, and kicked the door open. “GETITOUTGETITOUGETITOUTGETITOUTGETITOUT” Screamed he unendingly. It took Maria placing him in a sleeper hold and slamming the trunk shut to bring him back do his senses, or at least, as close as Giacomo could get to being back to his senses.
“Giacomo. Are you nuts? Calm down!” Maria slapped him a bit harder than was actually necessary to bring the guy back to his senses. Giacomo teared up, his lip starting to pout. “A cat killed my great great grandmother’s mother! I hate cats! They are strictly forbidden in the Scarfiotti residence!” And so, he defended his near-throwing a cat out of a moving vehicle. “Hm… Yes. Generational trauma. And how does that make you feeel?” It seemed that Dr. Dover had joined in the interrogation. Thibault looked back at the crew with bloodshot eyes, evidently not amused by the fact that everyone was talking over the sounds of the suspension creaking. “I know. How about. We all shut up, and leave it to a vote.” And thus, the vote was held to shut everyone up, and alas, 4 - 1, the cat stayed as a member of the group.
Shitbox Rally Stage 0 - Campsite.
And so, MCP survived. In hindsight, not a terribly difficult achievement, but they achieved it. Hanging around the van, which, with the windows rolled down and the trunk wide open, now doubled as a tent, Giacomo had one final inane suggestion.
G: “Okay, alright, how about this: for the next fuel stop, we just refuel and don’t stop!”
B: “As great of an idea as that would be, I don’t have anything to treat ballistic injuries, maybe save that one when I’m more equipped.”
M: “Please. If you let him operate on you once he’ll try some funky shit with you. I’ve seen my fair share of “successful operations” from this guy.”
C: “Yeah, My forehead itches ever since he stitched it up. Definitely suspect.”
T: “It’s a novel idea, but I think we’re better off coping with the fact that our fuel capacity is utter shit. Let’s just get some rest, and prepare for the next stage.”
And so, that was the end of the first stage shenanigans for Machinas Con Passione. Of course, the cat slept on the roof.
Part 3 - Fin
MCP try not to refuel every 2 seconds challenge (failed)
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holy shit another illustration wtf?
WATCHIN' EVERY MOTION IN THIS FOOLISH LOVER'S GAME
HAUNTED BY THE NOTION, SOMEWHERE THERE'S A LOVE IN FLAMES
TURNING AND RETURNING TO SOME SECRET PLACE INSIDE
WATCHIN' IN SLOW MOTION AS YOU TURN MY WAY AND SAY
TAKE MY BREATH AWAY
MY LOVE, TAKE MY BREATH AWAY
MY LOVE, TAKE MY BREATH AWAY
MY LOVE
MY LOVE, TAKE MY BREATH AWAY
TEAM BLAZERS
The quiet mumbling of the late night wind softly whispered its way through the tent’s openings as Romulo lay there wide awake. He was well aware that he ought to be asleep, yet despite the long tiring day that lay behind him, he couldn’t shake something off his mind. He lifted his arm to check his watch, tapping the button to allow it to light up and show him the time. He sighed as he sat up from where he was resting and looked all around, and it looked all as though everyone around him was sleeping soundly. He wondered if because it were because of the jetlag from jumping one timezone to another, but the difference in time between the points he jumped between weren’t even that large, so that was ruled out. He decided to attempt to clear his mind first and took the blanket off himself and getting up from where he previously lay.
Pulling the keys out of his pocket, he unlocked the vehicle’s doors. He figured if he can’t go to sleep naturally, he’d try a good old technique his father had once taught him. And now speaking of his father, he couldn’t help but wonder about what his peers would think, as he had disappeared seemingly without a trace and with his car along with him. He thought about the promises pledged to him, but a bit deeper this time. Trust is indeed a difficult thing to build up, but it’s not like the people he just met weren’t that untrustworthy. Clouded with these thoughts, he took the cooler from the back of the old Yamada, and pulled out a fairly chilly can of his father’s very own favourite Red Horse, cracking it open with a good pop, and taking a swig. The strong taste filling his mouth with a distinct bittersweetness that more powered the bitterness than sweet. Not immediately feeling it, he goes for another, but only the unfeelings of the night could ever come to his head.
“Are you really just… drinking here all alone by oneself?” In the midst of soft footsteps, he heard a voice call out from behind. Not immediately able to identify it at first, he looked behind, and barely illuminated by the lampara from within the tent was Emily. Her soft, long, golden hair resting upon her shoulders and the dim green dress she was handed to by Charlotte.
“And you? Don’t feel cold with that dress?” He joked, but fortunately for him Emily was able to take it, and softly chuckled. “Oh, you jest. I have gotten used to it.” She said walking over next to him who was leaning on the faded red door of the small crossover. “Now, what must you be drinking this lonely night?” She inquired as she leaned onto the door next to him.
He looked down at the red can and chuckled. “Something extra strong.”
“Is it alcohol?”
“Mhm, want a sip? Or are you not old enough?” He said, wiping the mouth of the can and gesturing the can over to her.
“I guess I could have a sip. It’s been quite difficult getting some sleep.” She said, taking the can. She read the label closely, and it was certainly a brand she’d never heard of before. Lifting the can up to her mouth, she nipped a bit of the orange liquid from the bright red can and felt immediately the strength of the beer flow down her throat. “Mm, you’re right. It’s… quite something, alright.” She handed the can back to him. “I believe you’re a man from the Philippine Islands, aren’t you?”
“Yeah, what about it?” He nodded as he took the can back.
“I’ve always wondered about the future. How much would the passing of time affect the development of the world around us. Especially so for someone like me, responsible for the design of a new form of technology that to us, have yet to unlock their truest potentials.” She sighed as she looked above and stared deep into the night sky of this foreign world. “From what I witnessed, the world definitely seemed to have moved.”
“I’ve never asked you directly, but what year were you in prior to that time warp?”
“I believe you hadst guessed it already when you were mocking Watson, 1936.”
“1936, huh? That means, you’re… older than my grandfather.” He looked over towards her. He found it hard to believe, but with what he had seen earlier, there was no reason for him not to believe anything anymore. But it truly boggled his mind how a woman older than his very own late grandfather, could look this young and be standing right here before him.
“Have you ever ventured out of the Philippines? Isn’t it a part of the United States? I believe travelling to and from the two continents wouldn’t be too difficult. From what I have observed, flying across oceans should not be out of the realm of possibility now.” She inquired, with her hand reaching for the can of beer still in Romulo’s hand. He handed the can over and perceived the moment the mouthpiece of the can had touched her soft-looking lips, the same mouthpiece that had previously touched his own. He hadn’t thought of it the first time, but now it was really getting to him.
“So, hadst you?” She tilted her head and once again handed the can over. Romulo grounded his thoughts yet again as he thought about the situation at hand. His head blanked out a bit, and he had forgotten the question she asked of him. He wondered if the alcohol was beginning to kick in, but still his body felt cold, so that couldn’t have been the case.
“P-please repeat the question?” He reached over towards the can, but Emily snatched it away and giggled. “Looks like you’ve had too much to drink for tonight.” She said as she once again, took another sip before actually handing it over.
“I was wondering about air travel.” She said as she once again looked to the sky. “Would the labour of me and the many other aspiring students of the study of the concept of the aeroplane bear fruit to something great? Or is it another fad that wouldst disappear into the midst of the night like the many that preceded it?”
“Air travel. Well, you saw those bird-like things flying over our heads? Those are…”
“The aeroplanes of the future, aren’t they?”
“Yup. I’m not quite sure how much different things are in your era, but nowadays, planes can cross oceans going thousands of kilometres an hour and carry well over a hundred people.”
“Is that so?”
Romulo nodded. “I’ve personally never ridden on one, but… I could only dream of what it could be like. Soaring above the clouds in a comfy chair at incredible speeds. It’s really something else what we’ve been able to achieve.”
“That sounds quite splendid. I wonder how difficult it would be to take controls of an aircraft such as that. By my own estimations, an aircraft of such caliber would need at least a dozen crew members to keep it in the air, and the engines required of them must also be something else.”
“Your own estimations?”
“As an aspiring aircraft designer, these things should be second nature to me. So would be the emotion of flying in something way up above the ground into the great blue yonder.” She giggled.
He took the can of beer away from her, there was about a quarter left, and he didn’t quite remember having drank that much. “Wait a second, how much did you drink? Emily? Don’t go telling me off not to drink too much when you’re out here drinking half my can!”
Once again, she sounded a drunken giggle. “I don’t get that drunk easily, I know my limits. That is about as much as I would drink.” She bumped him with her elbow. “Well then, since we have something to do tomorrow, I might as well call it a night. Talking with one many years in the future is quite interesting, Ray. This may sound unusual to you, but I’m grateful. I’m gratefule that I once again get an opportunity to do something of my own interests. Travelling somewhere unknown instead of running through the cramped alleyways in the Italian Peninsula from the Italian Fascist Police is something far more enjoyable than I could ever hope. I look forward to many more conversations we might have on the road. Take care.”
With the final remnants of her smooth blonde hair disappearing behind the tent, Romulo sighed as he once again stared into the deep dark blue of the night sky, listening as he heard the rustling of cloth from behind him in the tent. He was at a loss for words as he stood there alone. He wasn’t sure if it was the stirring emotions within him that were presently causing this unrest within him, or if it was the calm serenity of the night playing games with him and causing the said unrest. Whatever the case was, he just wished that he would eventually find himself struggling less.
The night felt as though it would last forever at this point as he looked down on his watch. Half an hour had passed since Emily had gone to rest, and yet he was still there wide awake. He took a final sip from the near empty can and crushed it with his one hand, tossing it into a nearby plastic bag before he himself went into the tent. Emily was there, fast asleep next to the ever mysterious Princess Ga’araiya, the two looking like a mother and daughter as they intertwined in a deep sleep. Off to the other side was Charlotte and Watson, separated by a gap that he was meant to fill into, but couldn’t from his restless insomnia.
He lay back down in his sleeping area, rolled over to the side and attempted to close his eyes. The pitch-black of his eyelids did not do anything to cure the insomnia, and so he opened his eyes yet again. When he opened them, he saw right there ahead of him was Charlotte’s red and green eyes staring back at him. He was slightly startled, and Charlotte noticed this, mouthing an ‘I’m sorry’ as she tilted her head downwards and avoided eye contact with him. He breathed out with a heavy pain, he now wasn’t sure whether or not her being unable to sleep was a product of his own insomnia, or something else was just off with her. But now he rolled back to where he would face the roof of the tent, and once again stared into the triangular housing as the soft wind’s mumbling whispered its way through the night.
But Romulo’s ears had caught another, softer whisper as he felt a hand slowly drape a blanket over him. “Are you unable to sleep as well?” He turned his head over, and before him was Charlotte’s face. His own nose mere centimetres away from the tip of her snout. Staring into her very much feline eyes, he found his mind blanking out for a moment before he looked away in embarrassment. “Y-… Yeah… I assume you can’t sleep either?”
“Mm…”
The two lay there in awkward silence, around them the silent ambience of the foreign lands of Aetherii filling the particulate void of a lack of meaningful conversation. In their minds, they seemed like the only two people in the world right now, and yet the only two people couldn’t seem to figure out how to get along. Romulo looked back over, Charlotte had her head tilted back down, but she didn’t seem like she was about to sleep any time soon. A certain melancholy loomed over her face, a certain kind of loneliness that one would link to those without a single remnant of kinship still within them.
“Charlotte…” Romulo broke the silence and Charlotte lifted her head to look back up at him. “What is it?”
“Something’s wrong, isn’t there?”
Her only response was a shake of her head, and once again she looked back down with the melancholy on her countenance.
“Just, who are you… Charlotte?” He said, looking back up at the dim-lit roof of the tent. He closed his eyes and once again saw a deep darkness as the light shut itself out, and yet still he couldn’t sleep.
“I… was a Princess of a certain city-state in Crugandr, a couple thousand years in the future…” She began, and Romulo opened his eyes to look towards her. Charlotte was looking back up at him, and he saw the soft innocent look grow on her face as she continued explaining. “You might begin to recognise a pattern, unrest, the declarations of War, nationalism, massacres, the development of combat and the battlefield, and the resulting casualties of what results… Yes, it was indeed like that. Despite the royal family making it out to an allied nation, no one can escape the supple arm of death as it overreaches with the technical divinity of mass destruction.”
She moved closer to Romulo’s face, their faces separated only by her whiskers. “There’s nowhere for me to return to… I put up a facade to hide the truth that looms within.” Her tone was distressed, but still she talked softly. “I could no longer return to that land. The land ravaged by warfare and the greed of intelligence and wisdom. The reason I asked for you to join me, is purely of my own selfish desires… My desires to once again see a land I can no longer visit, my desires to once again maintain a companionship with people whom I feel I could trust.”
There was a pause as a tear streaked down her cheek and onto the pillow from which she rested her head. Romulo moved his hand to embrace her, and she leaned in as well, wrapping her arms around him and finally bursting into tears. He leaned over and whispered, “For the time being, you’re not alone. You’ve got a team with you, and war… won’t happen with us. We can manage, and we’ll get through the rally together, as a team, and as compatriots.”
“Thank you…” She said through sniffles. “I really hope nothing goes wrong… Thank you for joining the rally… really… thank you…”
They stayed like that for a few minutes until Charlotte’s tears stopped. Romulo’s arms still keeping her in a warm embrace as she buried her face into his chest, still sniffling slightly.
“Say Charlotte, how did you come to trust me, and the others at that, too?” Romulo broke the silence. Charlotte moved away and wiped her tear, and Romulo had bore witness to the soft creature’s face right before him. Her eyes barely glistening with tears as the lamp lightly shone into her red and green eyes. Slowly, her face grew back into a smile he first witnessed when he met her, but this time, Romulo felt a sense of sincerity as she began to whisper once again.
“As I said, Charlotte can read other people’s hearts!” She said with a smile as innocent as that of a young kitten, and needless to say, upon the realization of the situation he was in, his heart began to race and he felt the heat rise to his cheeks. “I-I see!” He slowly began to move his arms away from her. “I… Do you feel sleepy yet…?”
“Hmm…? My eyes do feel a bit heavy, but I don’t think I’d be able to sleep just yet… Truth be told I don’t think I’ve had a good night’s sleep in a while.” She hugged him tighter.
“Is it because of what you said earlier?”
“Mhm…”
“I see. It must’ve been that hard, huh? Not to worry, try not to think about it too much.” He said as he placed his arm back over her. He didn’t feel comfortable letting her go just yet, as to him it seemed as though she was still on edge. “Why not reminisce about your days prior to the war? Don’t you still wish you were a princess? I’d imagine it would’ve been quite great, having your own servants, dressed up in pretty dresses, meeting Prince Charming?” He suggested. Charlotte giggled at that last remark. “Prince Charming? Really? That’s such an Earthling thing to say!” She continued to giggle softly, Romulo’s ears felt blessed as he heard the soft quiet laughter next to him before she finally continued. “Some aspects of being a princess were indeed quite enjoyable. Although I was quite jealous of the common folk. The amount of freedom they had, they didn’t have to adhere to the strict moral standards of Royalty, and more importantly they were free to love whoever.”
“Love, huh? That’s the most important thing to you?”
“Of course! Most of my family thought otherwise though. That I should just marry the neighbouring city-state’s prince instead of believing in the concept of true love… How about you, Ray? Have you ever fallen in love…? A regular commoner’s love?” She looked up at him.
“Commoner’s love? Well… I guess I have… It’s really nothing special though, and I got rejected in the end. It’s nothing really major.” He yawned. Charlotte seemed to loosen her grip on him slightly. “I see… I… too wish to experience some kind of love. I was always my parent’s last choice when it came to everything, though they had a good reason.” She giggled once again. “What’s that reason?” He asked her. She had this mischievous look on her as she explained. “I was the most rebellious of my sisters… I was the most opposed to all that royal bureaucracy nonsense, but still I was educated in the ways of a Princess and that’s something that doesn’t rub off easily.”
“I guess that’s why Watson managed to quickly identify you.”
“He’s got a very keen eye for a human. Makes you wonder what he doesn’t know. Although, really anyone from Aetherii would likely be able to recognise me as royalty.” She sighed.
“Why’s that?”
“My pelt. Jet black, like that of a panther. It’s unmistakable for a royal blood like me.” She said, sliding the blanket off her shoulders which revealed her glistening black fur. “I’ve been told my whole life it’s a beautiful sheen of black, but I’m not sure if you Earthlings would think the same.”
“I personally think it’s indeed quite beautiful…” He said with a smile, and she smiled right back at him. “Thank you… I don’t think an Earthling had ever called me that before…” She moved her nose closer to Romulo’s neck, lightly touching him and getting a sniff of his scent. “Ch-Charlotte?! W-wait, aren’t you being a bit too close?”
With her snout still pressed against his nose, she asked him, “You smell of alcohol… Did you drink?”
“Y-yeah… What about it? I was trying to get some sleep, so I thought I’d drink something to try and get me sleepier…”
“I smelled the exact same scent on Emily… She got up earlier right after you did…”
“We had a drink together, that’s about it. What are you getting at here?”
“You sound like you’re being guilty, what are you being guilty for, I wonder…?” She giggled as she moved her snout more up his neck, before arriving and stopping before his chin. “And what are you interrogating me for?” Romulo loosened his grip on her and attempted to move back, but Charlotte persisted, and kept herself clung unto him. Romulo felt himself bump into something, and he realized that Watson was still there asleep next to him. A disturbed grunt sounded from his general direction, followed by some mumbled words before he felt Watson turn over and move away from him.
Charlotte couldn’t help but giggle at the minor mishap, still clinging onto Romulo. “I figured I might as well use my princess powers to get what I want…” She pulled him closer and leaned into his chest once again. “I want to stay like this for a little bit… Can you wrap your arms around me again? That was really, really comfy…”
“I guess, if that’s what you want…” He sighed as he placed her in a warm embrace, he felt his heart thump faster and his face flush slightly, but still he tried suppressing his thoughts so she wouldn’t notice.
Eventually, after being within each other’s warm embrace through the breezy night, the two had gotten the good night’s rest that they were so much desiring for the longest time. Romulo thought about this moment for a bit as he felt his eyes start to fall heavy, things about whether she’ll remember this night or she’ll go back to her happy-go-lucky personality the next day. Their eyelids slowly fell shut as they settled in their warmth and after the long rollercoaster of a day, Team Blazers could call it off and finalize ‘Zero’.
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God following Yuri always sucks kek
The Witchlight
It was smooth travel in Aphrodite. Ambay had somehow fallen asleep in the back seat, meaning Kira was awkwardly stuck poking her head through the middle of the front seats. Handfull was perched on Elist’s shoulder. Finne was trawling over the pace notes he’d had to hastily make, making sure everything was a-ok for the proper rally to start on the morrow.
“I’ll try co-ordinate my notes with another team, I’m a good sight and scent navigator, no maps in the wilderness,” Finne was speaking with a mixture of concern and joy, though his expression was firmly stuck in concentration, “If I had any idea of the terrains, I could give it a real solid guess, maybe some recon before we’re meant to leave, though no idea how legal that is.”
“Whatever you think works the best, Finne. This driving shit is still real weird, thank god we’re convoying,” Elist chirped, “I’m shocked Ambay is already out, considering he always sleeps longer than any of us.” Kira lay her hand on Elist’s unoccupied shoulder, a brief glow appearing before vanishing just as quickly.
“I don’t think we need to worry, everyone is nice enough, and you have the skills we need. Ambay is the one we should worry about.” The Lizard was unresponsive, still fast asleep.
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With consultation and some writing from @Elizipeazie
04 March, 2022 /// 9:07 AM PDT
“Turn right! A right right here!!” Tanuki bounced in her seat frantically, pointing in a vague direction towards a clearing in the thick dry shrubbery.
Streaks of tan with accents of olive drab and varying shades of off-white darted past Mel’s peripheral vision as the yellow, red, and blue Dauer flew down uncharted gravel roads. The coupe’s nose lurched downwards as Mel leaned substantially into the brakes. She stabbed the clutch pedal, mashed the throttle once with the ball of her right heel, and pulled the shift lever from fourth into third in one smooth movement, and the midrange snarl of the boxer-6 exploded into a roar. Turning the wheel to the right and getting back on the throttle, the gravel trail slipped away from under them and gave way to a vague path of packed sand.
As the sun above rotated about the Dauer’s axis, its rear tires started to break loose. Snapping the wheel towards the left, Mel navigated the tricolor coupe through a long right-hander in a controlled drift. Jets of sand and dust were tossed sky-high by the rear wheels as she coaxed the car back into submission.
“I see them!” Tanuki chirped. “We made it! Hurry up, Mel!” Indeed, after a gentle left-hand turn, a massive flat clearing in the desert seemed to open up right before them. At least a dozen vehicles, fifteen to be exact, were parked in random empty patches devoid of prickly, dead flora. Various articles of camping equipment including tents and portable BBQ tables were strung out, about, and in between, but what really surprised Mel was the people… rather, things… she saw. Bipedal canids and felines, some normally sized, some gargantuan and built like brick shithouses. A centaur. Lizard man. A catgirl and a child with more white hair than her own father. Swedish hillbillies. She’d heard of them in many bedtime stories from childhood or maybe the odd DnD campaign her friends would beg her to try. But seeing them in person left her absolutely dumbfounded, and all higher brain functions failed her. This was no time for mind-breaking scientific discoveries or sanity-questioning, however, and she redirected her attention to more pressing matters.
Out of all the possible empty spots she saw, Mel located a vacant spot between a white wedge-shaped van with a giant “1” plastered on its side and a beat-up, boxy, orange liftback sedan. Navigating through some inexplicable train of thought, she decided that this was the best possible place to park. The Dauer roared over bumpy terrain and made a beeline straight for the two seemingly empty cars. Mel grabbed the handbrake and yanked it upwards as she sharply steered left before immediately countersteering to the right, and again the German coupe entered a drift at a steep angle. Plumes of dirt thirty feet in length shot out from the spinning tires, sandblasting the minivan and the liftback, including its interior and the unfortunate occupant inside.
“Come on, Mel, we’re late!” Tanuki shouted, pushing her door open and bolting towards the crowd gathered before an eight foot tall giant of a… two-headed wolf.
“WAIT!” Mel called out to Tanuki, who was already halfway towards the driver’s meeting. With a turn of the key, the boxer engine gently rumbled to a standstill and the minute vibrations transmitted through the steering wheel faded away. Mel pushed her door open and was immediately welcomed with angry shouts from the owners of the orange liftback, freshly caked with dirt and sand. “Oh, fuck me…” she mumbled to herself, before shouting multiple variations of “sorry!” back at them as she caught up with Tanuki.
As the brief meeting progressed, Mel found her confusion growing more and more profound by the second. Location-tracking rings capable of teleportation that could automatically translate languages into the wearer’s native tongue? Casting spells? A gateway? Why did they mention Earth specifically? Just as she was barely starting to make sense of what was truly happening, the meeting was already over, and the teams were dismissed.
“Tanuki.” Mel’s stern voice caught the attention of miss twin tails, who turned to face her and tilted her head.
“Yes?”
“I demand an explanation! What in the bloody hell did you sign us up for? You wanted me to escort you somewhere… Crug… whatever, correct? So what’s the deal with these lunatics going on about magic spells and teleportation? And why…” she bent over, her voice growing softer as she whispered in Tanuki’s ear, “… the hell are there talking cats? This isn’t a furcon, is it?”
Tanuki snickered, and again came that stupid laugh. “AHA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA! BAKA!” She smacked Mel across the back of her head. “The world is a far stranger place than you’d like to think, Mera - Melanie! But I’m not your teacher taking you on a little field trip. I don’t have time to explain everything to you!”
“Oh, come on now!” Mel groaned, sinking her face into her hands. “You brought me into this mess. I didn’t have a choice! I have every right to know what’s going on!” She crossed her arms and stared down at Tanuki, standing nearly 10 centimeters over her. But even with this considerable disparity in height, she didn’t budge in the slightest.
“Stay by the Black Rabbit’s side, and it’ll take you in,” Tanuki swore. She gave Mel a single pat on the head, causing her to recoil in surprise. “Just do as I say, Mel! Maybe you’ll survive and make it through! AHA HA HA HA HA HA HA!”
“Alright, fine.” Mel reached out and handed the registration papers to Tanuki. “I’m going to check on the orange car to make sure I didn’t bury its crew alive, poor bastards.”
“You go do that, I’ll get us checked in!” Tanuki took the papers from Mel, who quickly broke off and chased after the orange liftback’s crew. The spirited war criminal suddenly found herself alone, as the other teams had already returned to their vehicles to catch some rest or take inventory one last time. She spun around looking for the two-headed werewolf and quickly noticed him approaching the Dauer, hurriedly running over.
She knew Malavera was a giant compared to humans, but she didn’t get a true bearing of his size until she was standing next to him. He absolutely towered over Tanuki, the vertical distance between the top of their heads being just under 3 feet. They briefly exchanged greetings, Tanuki being unusually quiet and more polite than usual, even bowing slightly.
Tanuki looked down at the various insurance and liability papers, injury and personal loss waivers, and other assorted documents for Mel and herself, respectively. When she was filling her own forms out, there were countless queries she struggled to complete and some that she left outright blank. She was a nomad with nowhere to call home, a stranger with nobody to call her family. A merciless extremist who knew no other way to achieve her goals but deception and violence. Would this rally solve any of those? What was it that she was truly looking for? Would she find the answer here? This period of deep introspection was short-lived; Tanuki snapped back to reality after realizing Malavera was waiting for her, and passed the papers to him.
A minute passed, and Malavera finished reading both of their documents. He produced a registration sticker and handed it to Tanuki. “T- thank you…” she bowed slightly as she accepted the sticker with both hands from the towering, two-headed werewolf, who simply nodded in acknowledgement. The ground rumbled under her feet as he walked off towards the next tardy team and she watched in awe, running her thumbs over the sticker. SHITBOX RALLY ‘22 was emblazoned across the sticker in bold letters that sparkled in the morning desert sun. This rally would only be a “vacation” for her, but maybe she could find answers as well.
“Ugh!” Mel’s voice caught Tanuki by surprise, who yelped and jumped slightly. “Those guys in the liftback were pissed off! I’m gonna help them clean out some of the sand later, they’re busy for now.” Noticing Tanuki’s reaction, she changed her tone of voice, fearing what would come next. “Oh, have I startled you?”
“Ahah, not at all! I was just zoning out for a second,” Tanuki scoffed, brushing her bangs out of her face. She presented the sticker to Mel with an outstretched hand, holding it right in front of her face. “Look at this! Black Rabbit Corp. is now an official privateer rally team! I must admit, I’m impressed with your work, Mel!”
“Yea, sure thing,” Mel said halfheartedly, “but it’s not like I had much of a choice. Anyways, I need your help. I noticed some teams are forming alliances with one another. If we want a real shot at winning this or even just staying alive, we’ve got to do the same! Who knows what we’ll encounter along the way. I’ve lived most of my life in Australia where every other critter you see tries to kill you, but what if it’s worse over there? We’ve got to be ready for anything, and forming an alliance will prepare for the worst!”
“The hell would I do that for?” Tanuki shot back, frowning and crossing her arms. “I didn’t get this far relying on others to save my ass! Split-second decisions can make the difference between life and death, and if some little brat slowed me down, I cut them off! I’m not putting my life in the hands of probability or anyone else for that matter, especially these people!”
“Look Tanuki, would you rather apologize to those poor bastards I buried in sand yourself or help me find another team?” Mel snapped. “You heard what… what’s that two-headed wolf’s name?”
“Malavera! Weren’t you even paying attention?”
“What Malavera said! Our vehicle can only get us so far through rough terrain because it’s only 2WD. We need to find someone… anyone with a 4WD vehicle that’ll be able to unfuck us if we get bogged down!”
Tanuki’s eyebrows wrinkled as she scowled. Whatever expression of annoyance or anger she wore was hidden behind her sunglasses and mask, but Mel could still feel the pressure as if it exuded from her body. “And how do you know they’re not going to backstab us?” Tanuki countered almost instantly, the confidence in her voice equalling that of her stance. “How do you know they won’t magically disappear whenever we need them the most? How can you guarantee they won’t sabotage us, steal from us, harvest our kidneys and sell them to discount Chinese surgeons? There’s a saying in my line of work, Mel. The instant you trust someone else is the instant you stop trusting yourself.”
“Look, if it’s every man for himself, nobody is going to last more than a second out there. No amount of firepower or magic is going to change that. We need to look out for one another! Unless~, of course, you don’t mind getting caught in a bingle and are forced to use this little teleportation ring. Poof! Right back to the very hellhole you’re trying to escape from. And besides,” Mel added with a smirk, “not everyone here is a mad warmonger like yourself.”
Tanuki insisted on remaining independent and was very stubborn about doing so, but she wasn’t stupid. She spent some moments in silence, entwined deeply in thought, then communicated her final decision. “Alright, fine then. But if anyone shows so much as a sign of weakness… if anyone starts dragging us down…! Then it’s over!”
04 March, 2022 /// 9 Sun LJT
The strange Crugandr night was dimly lit and pleasantly cool, but not overbearingly chilly to the point that longer, thicker tops and bottoms would be required. Mel was especially thankful of this fact since she was still wearing her short shorts in response to the sweltering Nevadan climate from when the rally first started. Traipsing over lush alien overgrowth that brushed against her mostly-bare legs and maneuvering between monumental husks of textured wood, she finally came upon a new clearing in the campsite. There sat the odd liftback sedan from before, and now she could get a much better up-close view of it.
The orange paint, probably far more vibrant when it was purchased new in a bygone era, had lost its luster to the unforgiving decades and was now a dull shade of its former glory. It chipped at the fenders and scratched at the bumpers, but given its age, it was as if each one had its own story to tell. Not a single headlight glass was left intact; if they weren’t cracked, they were significantly fogged up, almost as bad as the plastic headlights of 2000s cars. And yet even with the slightly sagging rear suspension and the rust eating away at the rocker panels, it still stood dormant. It was a constant that remained intact amidst countless years of harsh mixed climates.
“Greetings, stranger,” an unknown male voice suddenly spoke.
“Fuck me!” Mel screamed and leapt back, throwing her arms up in a defensive stance and taking two full strides in reverse. Her eyes darted around and swung around with her head as it scanned the immediate area around her. The unexpected voice was unusually nonchalant and could have bored Mel to death if she had heard it in literally any other situation, but its suddenness and proximity caught her completely off-guard. Her eyes settled on the speaker who uttered it, a rather inconspicuous-looking man a fair bit taller than herself. “Jesus! Where the hell did you come from?”
“Ms. Melanie Lyon,” the man said. Mel noticed a halo-shaped LED light mounted on his temple, which momentarily glowed and pulsed in a yellow color before it turned into a constant shade of cyan. “May I inquire as to why you are here?”
“Wait, how the hell did you know that?” Mel glared at the man, who remained expressionless, and crossed her arms. “Just who are you, anyways?”
“My name is Connor,” the man replied calmly. “As I specialize in aiding law enforcement and criminal investigation activities, I have automated facial and vocal identification and recognition capabilities. In addition, I am able to perform a database sweep of criminal records using these parameters.”
“CONNOR!” a new voice shouted from behind the orange liftback, and both Connor and Mel looked in its direction. A second man in a very casual attire appeared, briskly walking over to the two of them with a giant socket wrench in his hand. He stopped beside Connor and gave him a good, solid pat on the back. “What did I say about scaring people?”
“My apologies, Tim,” Connor said calmly, then turned from him and faced Mel. “I must apologize to you as well for scaring you.” Mel was still slightly suspicious of him, but she could strangely feel some element of innocence from him after hearing his apology. With how unassuming he looked, she was almost sorry for being so cross with him just moments before.
“Hey, go check on Valentin. When he’s finished with his dinner, ask him if he can have a look at that AC fan again. We don’t want to be sweating our balls off later.” With this command, Connor headed back to the car and started conversing with a third figure that sat in front of the campfire who was having a meal. The wrench-bearing man faced Mel and smiled. “I see you’ve met Connor, our beloved team baby.”
“Quite the character he is,” Mel remarked in amusement. “How did he do that, the analysis? He said something about facial recognition, but I don’t see how he could’ve done any of that.”
“Oh, yeah. He’s an android made to help cops, so he has a bunch of scanners and stuff built in.” The man gestured to his head, tapping his temples. “I guess he saw you as a potential threat until he flagged you as a cop. Does that answer your question?”
“Not in the slightest.” Mel watched Connor as he wandered around the campsite. First talking dogs and cats, and now androids; she’d truly seen everything. “By the way, I didn’t have the chance to get your name earlier.”
“The name’s Tim. Tim Redwood.” He reached out with his vacant hand. “I never thought you’d actually come… ”
“… Melanie. But call me Mel,” she smiled, gently shaking Tim’s hand. “I’m a woman of my word. Where’s the rest of your team?”
“Over here. Come, I’ll introduce you.” Tim motioned Mel to follow him with his freed hand, and the two of them walked towards the orange liftback. “You’ve already met Connor here, but I’m not sure if you met Valentin yet. HEY!” He slapped the hood with a loud bang, catching the attention of this ‘Valentin’ peacefully having his dinner beside the campfire. “It’s her.”
“What? Oh, okay.” Mel heard a slight accent from his voice, something Scandinavian. She was immediately taken back when she saw him stand up and rise to his full height, finding herself having to lean back just to make eye contact with him. Fair-skinned and very lanky, perhaps his most impressive feature was his hair of prodigious length that was almost as tall as Tanuki.
“Mel, this is Valentin, and Valentin, this is Mel,” Tim introduced. “Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a meal to finish. Also, where’s Constantin…?”
“So you were driving that tricked-out rally car earlier,” Valentin said, recalling the events that transpired hours ago.
“Yeah, that’s me.” Mel nodded, then briefly hung her head in shame. “Listen, I’m really sorry about what happened earlier. I was in a hurry and didn’t want to be late to the meeting!”
“Ah, no hard feelings,” Valentin smiled. “I hope our future correspondences will be peaceful and amiable. Though the inside of our car is still quite sandy. I managed to get most of it out of my hair, thankfully.”
“That’s why I’m here,” Mel said. “After the meeting, I promised to Tim I’d come back and help you guys clean your ride out. It’s the least I can do. That’s why I brought this.” She held up her toolbox, which contained numerous socket, crescent, and allen wrenches in metric and imperial sizes.
“Well, how very nice of you. I’ve just finished my dinner, so shall we get started?” Valentin asked, opening the rear starboard door of the liftback. Mel peered inside and could instantly see the extent of the damage caused by her little drift entry earlier. A thick layer of sand coated nearly every carpeted surface, from the floor mats to the fabric padding of the rear bench seat. It was as if someone had driven through a sand dune then left all the windows down in the middle of a sandstorm. Sitting on the rear bench seat was an absolute unit of a man wearing a lövhögen-pattern BDU and boots caked in dried sand and mud. He was almost as tall as Valentin and shared his complexion, hair color, and eyes, but the greatest difference was that he was built like a brick shithouse. His shoulders spanned almost half the width of the entire bench seat, and the shape of his jaw and face in general made him look like a toned-down Swedish derivative of gigachad.
“Hey! I’m trying to eat here!” he frowned at Valentin, but instantly relaxed his gaze as soon as he saw Mel. “Oh, hello. Who might you be?”
“There you are,” Valentin chuckled. “Tim was looking for you earlier! Constantin, this is Mel, the driver of that sports car I told you about. Mel, this is Constantin. Don’t be scared by his getup, he looks hardcore but in reality he’s one of the nicest guys I’ve ever known!”
“Well, hello Mel,” Constantin reached out to shake Mel’s hand with a firm grip, which she returned with a similar tightness, to his surprise. “Good meeting you.”
“You’re a big guy,” Mel commented, respectfully eyeing his physique. As Constantin stood next to Valentin, she started to notice minute patterns and similarities between them manifesting, most notably in their upper facial structures. “Wait a moment, are the two of you siblings? Cousins, maybe?”
“What, just because we’re Swedes you think we’re related?” Constantin laughed heartily.
“Well, your eyes look similar to one another. Maybe the hair too. By the way, Valentin, I used to have my hair super long like yours back in primary school,” Mel reminisced, brushing her bangs out of her face. “It was too much of a hassle to wash, and besides, this is the longest the department’ll let me keep it. It looks good on you, though!”
“Why, thank you,” Valentin smiled. “Yes, it does require quite a bit of care to maintain. Anyways, let’s get started!”
With the painful exchange of formalities over, Mel and the team of the orange liftback could finally get to work in cleaning their sand-filled interior. Pulling out the carpets and floormats was easy enough, and merely giving them a few rigorous shakes and smacks against the tree trunks was sufficient in removing most of the loose sand.
Cleaning the rear bench seat was a slightly more involved task, as beating the fabric wasn’t enough to remove the sand. Mel and Constantin had to undo the four bolts holding it to the bare floorpan with socket wrenches, two of which were stripped and required brute force with a crescent adjustable wrench. Finally, after liberal amounts of swears were spouted from Mel’s and Constatin’s mouths, the bolts came off and the bench seat came loose.
“Valentin!” Constantin called from the port side, holding up his end of the bench seat. “Go help Mel carry the seat out.”
“No, no, I’ll be fine!” Mel lifted up the right side of the girthy, generously-padded bench seat effortlessly. To remove it from the vehicle, she pushed her end and walked across the inside towards Constantin, who pulled it out of the door opening. From there, they could clean out the rest of the sand on the inside and lean the rear bench seat on its side to easily remove whatever trace of dirt would be left between the cushions, again by beating them into submission.
Eventually, Mel and the rest of Tim’s team managed to remove most of the Nevadan dirt and sand that had been thrown inside by her drift maneuver during the first drivers’ meeting. “So, what do you think?” Tim asked the Australian detective as she dusted her hands off and reorganized her toolbox.
“You all seem like a nice buncha mates.” Mel looked up at the young American. Constantin was finishing up his meal, Valentin was shining a flashlight in the engine bay and attempting to troubleshoot the aircon issue, and Connor sat beside the campfire in deep contemplation. “Connor is… quite interesting. He’d be a big help in my line of work.”
“They’re a real bunch of bastards alright,” Tim agreed as he sat beside Mel on the trunk, ducking beneath the tailgate, “but they’re my bastards. I was talking about our car, though. You do know what it is, right?”
“Of course! An eighth-gen Anhultz Dione liftback, it was my mum’s first car and she kept it through most of my childhood. It was a total shitbox, of course, but it never died on her and we could always count on it.” She brought her legs up and sat criss cross, leaning against the rear side window. “Just sitting in here takes me back! I’m surprised there isn’t a V8 under the bonnet though, don’t you yanks like doing that to these?”
“Hah, the thought has crossed my mind a few times,” Tim conceded with a chuckle. “We actually just got this car recently. I had one just like it, but it broke down and traded it in for this less-broken one. But I was always afraid of fucking it up, so I decided to keep the engine stock.”
“It’s a solid car nonetheless,” Mel said as she closed her toolbox shut. “A little rough around the edges, but I would definitely count on it for a rally such as this!”
“I wasn’t able to get a good look at your team’s car earlier. It’s a German car, right?”
“Yeah, an ‘85 Dauer 632 S. The old man’s always wanted one, so after many months of searching I finally found one here and bought it. It’s Dauer’s first front-engine sports car, and although the handling isn’t as good as their rear-mounted models, it’s still absolutely bonkers to drive!”
“Heh, our cars are pretty much polar opposites. We’ve got the slow reliable shitbox, you have the fast unreliable one. Though I’ve heard Dauer engines are pretty reliable, no?”
“The motor is reliable, yes… for an 80s Dauer. It’s still one of their first fully-aluminium engines, and while they certainly learned some lessons from the 70s, it still likes to shit out head gaskets every once in a while.”
There was a period of unbroken silence for some time, and the two of them found their eyes inevitably drawn to the foreign night sky that slowly rotated over their heads.
“Hey Mel?” Tim looked towards Mel, his expression now serious. “Thanks for helping. I really mean it.”
“Yeah, of course!” Mel smiled.
“After this rally… when all is said and done… I’ll get this piece of shit fixed up, and I’m thinking maybe I could take you on a ride somewhere. You down?”
“Oh?” Mel turned towards Tim, surprised by this proposal that came out of the blue. Her initial expression of surprise turned into a smug grin. “Don’t get too ahead of yourself, Redwood. After all, we still need to make it out of here… that is, if one of these giant felines doesn’t make us their supper first.”
“Right, for sure! No worries…” Tim said with a trace amount of dejection in his voice.
It wasn’t very obvious, but Mel could still notice his shoulders slump and his head hand slightly, as if in defeat.
“I’ll think about it,” she said. The corners of her mouth betrayed her cool, collected projection as they started to curl upwards.
“Hey, by the way, where’s the rest of your team?” Tim asked.
As if on cue, Valentin knocked on the tailgate glass and bent down. “Uh, guys?” he said, looking inside to see a very surprised Tim and Mel. “Oh. Hate to ruin the moment, but I think someone’s looking for you, Mel.”
Mel leaned outside and saw Tanuki conversing with Connor and Constantin close by, the two of them very cautiously escorting her towards the Dione. Her bouncy steps made her braided twintails swing rhythmically and the strap of the HK416 slung across her back bite into her shoulders. She saw Mel’s head full of platinum-blonde hair peeking out and started waving enthusiastically. “My beloved driver! Come on, we need to prepare for the next stage! Finished helping your friends here?”
“Wait, she’s your teammate?” Valentin and Tim simultaneously asked, looking at Mel incredulously. Constantin came over and whispered something into Tim’s ear. The smile on his face was gone as he looked at Tanuki, then at Mel, then back at the masked face.
“Yes! Everyone, this is my… navigator, Tanuki,” Mel said, carefully setting her legs on the ground to avoid getting pins and needles and standing up besides her teammate. “Well, you heard the boss. It looks like my job here is done, and it was a pleasure meeting you all!”
“Boss?” Tim, Valentin, and Constantin glanced at each other, sharing a profound mutual confusion.
Both parties bid their farewells without much incident or drama, for the night had already matured substantially and it was time to prepare for the next stage. Mel and Tanuki walked together through the dense undergrowth back to their site, consisting of the brightly-colored Dauer 632 S and a dying campfire. “So, what do you think?” Mel asked. Tanuki cocked her head sideways towards Mel, then looked skywards with eyes lost in thought. “That wasn’t so bad, was it?”
“Hmph!” She crossed her arms and scoffed. “They seem harmless for now. Their little robot helper and that Constantin guy are impressive, but they’ve yet to prove themselves. I’d like to see how they handle this upcoming stage! Then we’ll talk.”
“Yeah, alright…” Mel sighed and buried her hands in her pockets. “We should clean up our site before going to sleep. Make sure everything’s packed up so we can just get up and leave without wasting time picking up after ourselves.”
After repacking all of their supplies and equipment for the night, Melanie and Tanuki finally brought their very long day to a conclusion. After putting out the campfire, they clambered awkwardly into the Dauer’s cramped hatch and fell soundly asleep.
7 Likes
RK Series Racing; Stage 0 Camp
With the cat having ran off for the time being and the friendly apology done and dusted-off (pun intended), the group of three start setting up sleep sites.
Constantin: “Anyone else think it’s kinda weird how someone is hauling around an assault rifle like it’s nothing special?”
Connor: “The US-State of Nevada allows open-carry of both handguns and long guns without any requirement regarding permit.”
Constantin: “Wait WHAT?”
Redwood: “Yeah… We do that… Depending on where you are laws may be ‘stricter’, though.”
The discussion is left at that, with Valentin showing visible concern about the sheer amount of guns spread among the teams. He never held, let alone fired anything more substantial than a Nerd™-Blaster and felt very little reason to be randomly shooting at property or even people. The others took note of the agitation and just went about their business preparing beds. The front headrests were removed and places in the rear footwell to allow the seatback to fold flat, forming a two-person bed. Some leftover blankets from the 24 hour Trafikjournalen Run served as a source of warmth for the night. Meanwhile, Constantin at the back set up his own little base for rest. A water-tight Tarp was placed along the loading ridge of the Tangerine-Tank™’s trunk, carefully avoiding blocking the release latch. Then, said trunk was slammed shut, twice, locking the Tarp inbetween the trunk lid and the rear bumper assembly. He then went about securing the other end to the ground with two pegs, which go in fairly easily, disregarding the multiple attempts it took to not hit any roots from nearby trees. A simple sleeping bag and rather worn isolation mat used for camping completes Constantin’s “bed”. Connor simply is parked next to the nearside front door of the liftback sedan and will idle there for the night.
Not long after, the three wish each other a good night and go to sleep.
Or… attempt to sleep, anyway…
3 Likes
TEAM HILLBILLY ROLLERS
PART 0.1 - A prologue to the prologue
PART 0.2 - Another piece of the prologue puzzle
PART 0.3 - Viva la IP 4Z!
PART 0.4 - Robotman
PART 0.5 - Interference problems
PART 0.6 - Can I play Tetris?
PART 0.7 - Tangerine and familiar
PART 1.0 - Now things got serious!
PART 1.1 - Hello, Thibault and friends!
PART 1.2 - Poor kitty
PART 1.3 - Curse you, Team Oil Crisis!
PART 1.4 - Interlude
Janne felt a little bit relieved when Rukari accepted the kilju. Now he thought that when the team had gotten kilju from him, and snus from Andreas, they would have compensated for Marie’s thirst for moonshine. Though only a while later he saw that something strange happened to Malavera.
JANNE: “Oh… I really should have said this. It can strike pretty hard if it is the first time. I guess that Andreas never told that…”, he said with a bit of a shame in his voice. “…nah, if anyone should excuse himself, that’s me”.
He went back to the tent that Andreas had managed to put up.
JANNE: “I don’t want to sleep in a tent that you have put up. I only want to sleep in a tent that Marie have put up”, he said, just because he knew it would drive Andreas mad.
ANDREAS: “Well, I have a solution for you then! Wrap yourself in a piece of cloth and sleep under the Union Magistrate because it will literally be the same thing!”
MARIE: “How can their absolutely arse driving be MY fault?”
JANNE: “Oh, just relax, their driving will be put to the test soon I guess. Don’t think that this environments will be easy for the unexperienced driver. Good thing we have got Andreas.”
ANDREAS: “YEAH BECAUSE I HAVE CLEARLY BEEN DRIVING IN SOME KIND OF LSD TRIP MY WHOLE LIFE SO THIS WILL JUST BE THE SAME THING AS I AM FAMILIAR WITH, OH RIGHT?”
JANNE: “Take it easy, there is an explanation for everything in this case.”
MARIE: “At least it will be easy to sleep tonight.”
JANNE: “Why?”
MARIE: "Because not even my nightmares features this weird stuff.
ANDREAS: “Your nightmares? Can you have more than three different ones? Number one, someone stole your booze. Number two, someone peeled of the stickers hiding the rust holes on your goddamned Dodge Dart. Number three, someone has stolen the remote for your VCR…oh, nevermind. That one was actually real.”
(Marie slaps Andreas)
JANNE: "Well, it’s time to get boring and go to sleep anyway. Falling asleep at the wheel is a bad idea here…I can’t get into details, but it would be bad, really, really bad. We need to stay alert tomorrow.
TO BE CONTINUED…
(Not much of a writeup but I felt that it was needed to end stage 0 before the serious stuff starts)
2 Likes
Shitbox Rally
Stage 1: Jaduvira to Viravalli
Stage Start: 1 Sun, 19/7/3251, Jaduvira Campsite
Weather at Stage Start: Warm and humid, though a good breeze keeps it from being uncomfortable.
Weather at mid-stage: Stifling heat and humidity with a lack of wind.
Weather at Stage End (First Car): Hot and humid, though the breeze has returned.
Weather at Stage End (Last Car): Hot and humid with a strong breeze.
Stage End (First Car): A little after 2-and-40 Sun, 19/7/3251, Viravalli Campsite
Stage End (Last Car): A little after 4-and-60 Sun, 19/7/3251, Viravalli Campsite
The road leading out of Jaduvira is smooth cobblestone and relatively wide, offering up a potential for high speeds provided you keep an eye out for dips, low-spots, and crooked sharp stones. On either side of the road after leaving Jaduvira properly, there’s a lot of forest. Those with keen eyes can see amber eyes watching you, low to the ground, but little else of the creature they belong to. There are a few hills, a few curves, but nothing too severe. Everyone has to dodge around a stagecoach approaching from Viravalli, and for a brief time, the road runs parallel to the tracks, leading to a race between some cars and a little blue 4-6-2 streamlined steam locomotive named “Teapot” and the train of 5 coaches behind it. Nearing Viravalli, there is a large dip that catches a lot of the faster drivers by surprise, leading to a challenge over the radio, “Can you get all four wheels in the air?” At the town of Viravalli, the houses are mostly made of wood with thatched rooftops, and the townsfolk would really prefer all of our crazy contraptions stayed out of their town. As a result, camp was done just off of the road, near the forest, on the other side of the Duskwater River.
Notes: Randomization is active. Breakdowns are active. Time is in Earth Time (mostly because I can’t make my spreadsheet operate in Aetheriian time… And I absolutely refuse to sit here and play “Convert the times to seconds, then break it back down into Aetheriian hours, minutes, and seconds.” That would be pure hell).
Team Shift Happens
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 04:01:05
Average MPH: 88.4
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
Six people and a big cat in the Bricksley Highwayman makes for a cramped space, and it doesn’t help that our main navigator is stoned out of his mind, but, ironically we make excellent time partially because of him.
Team Wayfarers
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:10:08
Average MPH: 68.72
Randomizer: 10
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
The IFAZ Bogatir roars along at a good pace and joins the race against Teapot. “Chernobog” has no trouble pulling a lead on the little steam locomotive before the train vanishes behind the trees.
Team Gearknobs
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:13:47
Average MPH: 67.92
Randomizer: 10
Refueling Stops: 0
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
The Hakaru Carica does its best in the race against Teapot, but is just a touch slower than the speeding steam locomotive. On the other hand, the little hatchback isn’t slow.
Team Fallen Angels of the Past
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 04:29:06
Average MPH: 79.186
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 0
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
The Claussient 25 may not be the fastest car overall, but when driven hard, remained quite controllable, allowing Maria and Lucia to run a surprisingly quick stage.
Team Slow
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 04:34:55
Average MPH: 77.52
Randomizer: 12
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
The Schnell XL53 isn’t letting this team live up to their team name on this stage. Other than a brief stop to refuel, the Schnell was pushed hard through this stage, and made good time.
Team Oil Crisis
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 03:53:56
Average MPH: 91.104
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 2
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
With speeds like that, no wonder they have an oil crisis! The Union Magistrate was one of the first cars flying over the surprise dip in the road, and were the ones who originated the challenge to get the wheels off the ground going over it. Even stopping twice for fuel didn’t slow them down.
Team Hillbilly Rollers
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:24:23
Average MPH: 65.7
Randomizer: 9
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 4 (Team Caused Slowdown)
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
While we don’t know exactly what slowed down the IP Freeway Star, something certainly slowed them up a bit. Still, they made it into the campsite with plenty of time to spare, and a vehicle none-the-worse for the mishaps the team experienced.
Team Witchlight
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 04:20:53
Average MPH: 81.692
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
The EAAC Aphrodite speeds through this stage like a bolt of lightning, despite being the size of a small battleship.
Team Mravolinski-Chitco
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 06:45:36
Average MPH: 52.544
Randomizer: 8
Refueling Stops: 0
Breakdown: 3 (Tires)
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
The Kontir Cunningham was quick, up until hitting a heavy bump blew out both rear tires, forcing the team to fix the problem on the side of the road.
Team Blazers
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 03:48:38
Average MPH: 93.216
Randomizer: 12
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
The Yamada ASR-4 showed everyone today that it was meant to be a rally car. With Watson driving like they had warp-speed turned on, they were the second team to discover the dip near the end, and had all four wheels off of the ground for a brief moment.
Team Machinas Con Passiones
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:12:54
Average MPH: 68.112
Randomizer: 11
Refueling Stops: 4
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
Despite an insane amount of refueling stops, the MCP AWSB managed to keep pace with Teapot, but couldn’t manage to pull ahead. At least it wasn’t falling behind, until the team had to stop and put more fuel in the tank.
Team Quick Rally 47 (Quantum Xenoanthropology)
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 04:08:58
Average MPH: 85.6
Randomizer: 10
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
Everyone knew the Mara Kanyon was tough, but few knew it could be fast, too. Despite a punishing pace, the little SUV held up just fine, although the AI may not have enjoyed taking another impromptu flight over the dip.
Team Mrezhari
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 04:16:39
Average MPH: 83.04
Randomizer: 12
Refueling Stops: 0
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
The Dunav 3300 handled the cobblestone road with no problems, and likewise joined the airtime club over the dip.
Team Jockey
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 04:17:07
Average MPH: 82.888
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 2
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
Getting air over the dip in a car the size of the Yinzer MightyTiny is definitely a way to get noticed. Managing to not smash anyone’s head through the roof of the little car was even more impressive.
Team RK Series Racing
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 07:08:51
Average MPH: 49.696
Randomizer: 8
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 2 (Chassis)
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
Electing to replace the broken headlight at the very start of the stage may have been an initial setback, but maybe, just maybe, it’ll pay off in the end.
Team Black Rabbit
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:09:33
Average MPH: 68.848
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
The Dauer 632 S PANAM had no issues being faster than Teapot in a straight up race, and neatly dodged around the MCP AWSB when they stopped right in the middle of the road to refuel without any incident.
Team Spy Kids
Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 03:28:41
Average MPH: 102.128
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 355.2
The first to enter the “All Wheels Off” Airtime Club over the dip (and even before it became a proper challenge), the AST Elbrus seemed to handle it well. Whatever brand of Soviet rocket-fuel the engine is running seems to be good for it.
(Author’s note: Yes, the car is running Low Quality fuel. However, Kerosene can be used with an oxidizer as rocket fuel, so the rocket joke can still work.)
Team Shift Happens
Previous Chapters:
It’s Go Time! - Starting Party 6 PM
Boldly Going / Through the Rift / Arrival in Jaduvira - Stage 0
When the Hell are We!? - Stage 0 Campsite
Out of His Damn Mind - Stage 0 Campsite
One Hot Night / Letters from the Past - Stage 0 Campsite
Jaduvira Campsite, 1 Sun Local Time
Rukari watched as everyone finished packing their tents, shuffling cargo around, and stuffing the last bites of their breakfast into their mouths. Today was the day the Rally would start. With little ceremony, he dropped a double-charge of powder down into his murdaira, loaded the cork ball he’d made the day before, raised it to his shoulder and aimed it skyward, then fired it.
The deafening blast scared birds out of the trees, startled some of the teams, and, for those familiar with LeMans-style starts, set some teams running for their cars. Those who weren’t quite familiar saw people running to the cars and did much the same, cranking over engines and tearing their way out of the campsite. A lone cat jumped out of a tree and landed inside the van of Team Hillbilly Rollers, their teal and brown-striped cat returning at last and dropping a bird in Marie’s lap.
Kivenaal got into the driver’s seat of the Bricksley, groaning as Malavera was loaded next to him in the mid-bench and as Rukari got in next to Malavera. The rear bench, like it had been the day before, housed Kayden, Jayde, and Kaylie, as well as Jayde’s new cat, Shadow. The Bricksley rasped to life, Kivenaal twin-sticked the transmission from 1 through 5 in low, then popped the transfer case into high range and ran 3, 4, and 5 to get up to speed.
On The Road
“Mal, get your fucking foot off of my fucking throttle!” Kivenaal growled. This was the fourth time the stoned Khalan had stretched out in the seat and pinned the accelerator straight to the floor. The Bricksley’s all-terrain tires squealed around another bend as Kivenaal tried to keep the truck on the road, his hands holding a white-knuckle grip at 10, 8, 4, and 2 on the wheel as he weaved around a stagecoach and over a small hill. The mighty V8 snarled, rasped, and roared in response as the Highwayman screeched the tires in the swerve, the truck threatening to leave the road several times in a series of barely-recovered fishtails.
Malavera laughed as the Bricksley got a bit of air over a small bump, clearly not in his right mind as he looked around the cabin. Kivenaal had a snarl on his face as he fought with the big heavy truck at wide open throttle. Rukari was his usual calm, cool, and collected self, not showing any fear even when the truck went wide and sprayed dirt everywhere. Kaylie had the CB microphone in her right hand to keep it from leaving its perch and hitting anyone in the head. Kayden, for once, looked almost terrified. Jayde was clinging onto the front edge of the rear bench, looking as if he was regretting his decision to get swept up into this adventure. Shadow, Jayde’s new cat, was clinging to the floor with six paws worth of claws, occasionally looking toward the window on Kaylie’s side as if it might decide bailing out was the safer option.
Then, Team Oil Crisis hailed them on the CB. “Aedan here! Look out on your left!”
Kaylie watched as the Magistrate streaked past, then sailed over a not-exactly-small hill, V8 roaring in defiance of being flung into the air, mere moments before everything crashed back down to solid ground.
This was the only warning Kivenaal got, as soon after, they too hit the hill at way too high a rate of speed, were flung into the air as well with the Bricksley’s cast-iron boat-anchor screaming for mercy and backfiring twice, before they crashed down on the other side, catapulting the contents of the cabin into complete chaos.
Sure enough, the Bricksley had hit the mild jump and managed to get all four wheels off of the ground before it came back down. Malavera’s foot was jostled off of the gas pedal and Kivenaal wrestled control of the speeding ballistic Bricksley back from the brink of certain doom, tires wailing around a corner.
Then they heard the challenge from Team Oil Crisis over the radio. “There’s a dip in the road up ahead. How many of you think that you can get all four wheels off the ground?”
Kivenaal groaned as he realized just how many more vehicles might take the risk of some permanent suspension softening now that the challenge had been issued.
“These are meant to be ground vehicles, right?” Jayde asked Kaylie.
“Yeah, they are,” Kaylie answered.
“Then, please, for the love of the Dancing Sisters above, keep it on the ground!” Jayde said.
Kivenaal was glad when he was able to park the overheating Bricksley outside Viravalli, the clutch-driven engine fan outright roaring as it tried to pull the Bricksley’s engine down from 240 degrees Fahrenheit. He left the van idling for several long minutes as the engine tried to cool down in the searing heat of Crugandr’s midday sun.
Viravalli Campsite, 5 Sun
With tents, cars, and a campfire started in a small clearing across the road from the town of Viravalli, a clearing which made a lot of sense given the lumber mill near the river, slowly sawing its way through another large log, all of the teams got a chance to relax. It was the middle of the day, but everyone had just dealt with several long hours of driving. Of course, this really just meant that everyone in Team Shift Happens was in the mood to party.
Malavera was still a little impaired from his incident the day before, though was starting to show signs of recovering. Of course, his appetite was still just as strong as it was before, and so he ended up having two steaks seared in a pan over the campfire.
Kivenaal, likewise cooked up a thick slab of venison for himself, having gone into the town of Viravalli and bartered for it. Because of his looks (more specifically, who he looks like), the butcher gave Kivenaal quite the discount, which, ironically, annoyed Kivenaal quite a bit.
Rukari reheated what was left of last night’s stew, pouring a bowl for himself, Kayden, and Kaylie. Between the three of them, there wasn’t much left.
Jayde opened up one of his magic bags and pulled out a loaf of bread, which he cut into slices and used to clean up the last of Rukari’s stew. When he got stares from Kaylie and Kayden, trying to figure out how the bag held a loaf of fresh, still steaming bread that was easily twice as long as the bag itself, Jayde chuckled. “It’s a gift from my time at Kamwerth Academy of the Arcane,” he said. “Three times per day, I can pull a fresh loaf of bread out of that bag, so I’m never without food.”
“I can see how that would be handy,” Malavera said, now no longer as badly affected by the nicotine high. He knew he was going to have a hellish double-headache later after his encounter with the tobacco.
“Pair that with cheese and meat, you have instant sandwiches,” Kivenaal added, cutting a bite of meat and chewing it.
Jayde nodded. “It has its uses. It’s like my canteen that never runs out of water. Can’t pour it at any great speed, but I always have fresh drinking water.”
Kaylie looked over at Kivenaal and asked, “So, what’s with the sour look?”
“Someone recognized me as someone else,” Kivenaal replied, trying to dodge the question.
“Okay. Well, the humans often say everyone has a double,” Kayden said. “What, did that person owe money to someone, and they asked you to pay up?”
“No,” Kivenaal said.
“He looks like Xelth, the Father of Us All,” Rukari said.
Kivenaal immediately groaned, then said, “I hate when people say that.”
“But it is true,” Malavera replied. “Valraadi mythology says that Xelth looks a lot like you. Maybe a bit taller, but then again, sometimes stories are a bit exaggerated.”
“Can we please stop talking about this?” Kivenaal snapped. “I’m not a fucking symbol, I’m not a god, I’m just me. Quit putting me on a damn pedestal and expecting me to want to be worshiped, I don’t.”
Jayde chuckled. “Most people I know want to be heroes. You’re the first who I’ve seen who doesn’t want that kind of recognition,” he said.
Kivenaal turned to stare at Jayde before answering, “Because I hate what it represents, Jayde. I’m not Xelth reincarnated. I don’t have his great and mighty magical talents. I can do some impressive things with fire, and I can make water explode, but-”
“You have not been trained,” Rukari said, interrupting Kivenaal. “You might be stronger than you think,” he added, studying his brother for a moment. “And if you look far enough into our bloodline’s history, Kivenaal, Xelth was part of it. That it shows in you is something to be proud of.”
“Yeah, I’ve heard this speech before,” Kivenaal said, rolling his eyes. “I’m supposed to be the savior of our people, supposed to bring us back to the golden era. Supposed to fight in great battles and sire many sons and daughters, sit upon the throne in Galren’s Height and rule our people while claiming the title of Emperor. I don’t want any of that.” He finished his meal in silence, a stony cold response to being pushed too close to the memories of a past he desperately wished to forget. He got up, walked back to the truck, opened the jug of kilju and poured himself a heavy glass, drinking it quickly before giving a grimace. “Yeah, I bet I know where that came from,” he muttered to himself, putting the jug back in the truck. “Gets you drunk, not the best tasting.”
Kaylie looked over at Kivenaal, then back to the rest of the group at the table. “He’s got some demons in his past, doesn’t he?” she asked.
Jayde nodded. “Everyone does. But from what I’ve heard, his may be bigger than most.”
(OOC: And so it truly begins. I’m ready for some open RP in the camp. Let’s get a first stage party going!)
3 Likes
Strong Language Warning, Read at your own risk.
Campsite One (Team Oil Crisis)
Jaduvira, Vira Province, Crugandr.
Local time: 10 Moon Time - 1 Sun Time
Weather: Warm and Humid
Packing Up
Aedan felt the cold creep through his fur, despite being huddled up between his brother and Pavel. The sun was almost there but the sky was growing more blue with every passing second. Neither Orlan or Pavel were stirring, the perfect time to start waking up the team.
A tap on Orlan’s shoulder began this charade. “Ori, Its time to wake up.”
The light brown lombax muttered something and didn’t make any attempt to wake up. Who knew that it would be this problematic to wake up a light sleeper. “C’mon, Wake up we’ve got to start packing up.”
This time Orlan formulated a full sentence. “Just give me a few more minutes, mom.” He sleepily muttered. Why did this have to be so hard?
“That’s it, I’m pulling out all the stops”
Orlan was jarred from his dream by a sharp jab in the ribs. The Culprit? Aedan.
“Ow! What the fuck was that for!?” He hissed.
“You weren’t waking up so I had to resort to drastic measures.”
“And you thought poking me in the ribs as hard as you could was the best course of action?”
Meanwhile, Pavel had begun waking up. The giant rolled onto his back and slowly opened his eyes. What was all this commotion?
“Are you two having a disagreement?”
Aedan shook his head.
“No. It’s that–.”
“This motherfucker poked me in the ribs really hard.”
“Ok, Ok, I’m sorry.”
“Yeah, You’d better be.”
Within minutes the trio in the Magistrate had gotten out and begun to disassemble their sleeping arrangements. Pavel had woken up and was helping K’mino and Malcolm dismantle their tent. While Orlan and Aedan were putting the weapon crates back in the car. Soon the FN Herstal crate containing the FALs and the M92s had been put in the car, and the Walther crate on top of it. The luggage was then thrown in afterward followed by a tool chest, some ammo boxes, and the crate containing the super sensitive weapon that was loaded more carefully than the other stuff. By 10:45 moon time, the Magistrate had most of the large belongings, these being the weapon crates, the ammo boxes, luggage, the super “sensitive” weapon, Gunther, Pavel and the cat were loaded in the cargo area that was formerly a bed. The rear seats had been folded up and the air mattress deflated and stowed neatly in the overhead cargo net in the roof extension.
In the final 10 minutes, Aedan went around picking up all the smaller belongings like the camp stove and some of the lawn chairs and placed them in the back with Pavel and Gunther, and the cat whom Pavel had named Whiskers.
Soon the time came to get on the way, and when Rukari’s rifle produced a deafening kaboom, it sent all five Lombaxes running for the Magistrate. Well technically four since Pavel was still in the back petting Whiskers, who now didn’t seem to like being held against his will that much anymore.
Once the passenger side rear door slammed shut, Aedan put the key in the ignition and turned it to the ignition position. The only thing that happened was the starter motor began cranking but the engine didn’t turn over. Strange.
When the second attempt failed, Aedan slammed a fist into the steering wheel and cranked the starter motor again. The IP Van had peeled away, tossing dirt from the rear wheels. The Yamada across from them lurched forward and turned onto the road.
“Come on! Start you vicious bastard!” He shouted.
It was with this command that the car started, almost as though it had been listening. Aedan’s anger quickly became excitement, and he threw the Magistrate’s column shifter into drive and put the pedal to the floor, the Narrowblock shouting in protest as the rear wheels, or well one of the rear wheels, struggled for traction.
Finally, the Magistrate got on the cobblestone road, its tires giving a small screech as the wheel regained traction on the stone pavement. The road opened up ahead of the Magistrate, and all Aedan could do was put the hammer down.
On the Road
The olive drab and rust wagon roared across the road. Aedan and his teammates watched with mild concern as the Bricksley Highwayman veered across the road.
“You think one of em’s hammered?” Malcolm asked from the back seat.
“Sure looks like it, Their navigator, Malaver–, Male–,” He paused for a moment as he remembered the name. “Malavera, The wolf thing with two heads is higher than me when I eat a cannabis plant. Don’t think he’s driving though.”
K’mino piped up suddenly. “Hey! Watch the road!”
“Wha-- Oh, shit.” The Magistrate swerved around a stage coach, with Pavel, Whiskers, and Gunther flying all to one side.
“What in the hell are you doing up there? Can you drive less like the professional dumbasses in front of us? I highly suggest you try not to kill your emperor.”
“Sorry, Your Majesty.”
“You don’t have to be so formal. Its not like I’m the one who’s giving orders.”
Aedan rolled his eyes, and chuckled. “Fine.”
“Let’s try going around the Bricksley, safely. I’m not sure how safe it is to be back here with that craziness going on.” said Orlan.
Nodding, Aedan grabbed the CB radio’s microphone hanging out from where the original radio used to be.
“Yo, Truckers. It’s Aedan. Coming up on the left!”
The four speed ZAURTEK kicked down into first and the Narrowblock roared in spectacularly, calling every bit of power from its 4.5 litres.
The Bricksley streaked past as they over took it, the speedo just barely passing 70 miles an hour when the Magistrate hit a decent sized hill, the Narrowblock screaming in protest as the rear wheels lost traction once again. The two seconds in the air felt like ten, followed by a touchdown harsher than Ryanair landing, sending any loose items, Pavel, Whiskers, and Gunther included flying.
“Ow, Fuck! My back. My damn back! I ask you not to pull this kind of shit and what did you do? You do it again!.”
“Sorry, Pavel. But, there was a hill, and we were doing 75 miles an hour. There was no time to slow down and drive over the hill like a pensioner.”
“Go fuck yourself, You hear?”
“Stop being so bitter about my driving, you should be grilling Orlan, he nearly ran somebody over.”
Pavel only responded with a sigh.
“Anyway,” The CB radio was in Aedan’s hand again. “To all those a little bit behind, there’s a dip in the road just up ahead. Anyone want to try getting all four wheels off the ground?”
“I don’t think that’s a good idea.”
“Shut up, Ori. You ran nearly ran over Marie back in the other camp.”
That response was met with an eye-roll.
End of Stage one, Campsite (Team Oil Crisis)
Viravalli, Vira Province, Crugandr.
Local time: 3:30 Sun Time - 4:00 Sun Time / 4:00 Sun - 4:30 Sun
Weather: Warm and Humid with a breeze.
3:30 Sun - 3:40 Sun
All was well when the Magistrate had finally pulled into the camp. But like always, that was until Aedan almost ran over Marie from Hillbilly Rollers when he was reparking the Magistrate atop the hill nearby. Marie flipped them off and cursed in Swedish as they pulled away, though It was more her fault since she walked out in front of them without looking both ways.
“Does she have a death wish or something?”
Orlan shrugged.
“I don’t know, it does look that way.”
4:25 Sun Time - 5:00 Sun Time
The team had finally settled down atop a small plateau, The Magistrate lay dormant right where the incline up to the plateau was. At the bottom lined up on the left side where the Dione, Yamada, Dauer and Freewaystar .
“First stage done. Does anyone want a drink?”
The other four team mates cheered as Aedan reached inside the Magistrate and opened the lid to the under seat storage area. It was a feature Union motors introduced in the 70s for their Vanguard models it was extremely useful and spacious, especially on the Magistrate Vanguard, where it was deep enough to fit a decent sized cooler inside the compartment.
Aedan produced a half empty bottle of Jack Daniels Whiskey from the cooler, and a package of plastic cups. Five were removed and the rest went back into the storage compartment. Soon the whiskey had been poured.
“It’s a beautiful day.”
The other four team mates looked up in the sky around them.
“Sure is,” K’mino said taking a sip from his whiskey. “It’s not like what we have on Fastoon though.”
Everyone muttered something along the lines of yeah.
Orlan had been rummaging through the under seat compartment looking for something before he turned around. “Who’s up for some Tomorrow Never Dies?”
Aedan twirled around upon hearing the name of their collective favourite action movie. “Hell yeah, we all are!”
“Just let me get the DVD player out.”
Soon the gang had gathered together inside the Magistrate and had begun watching the movie. Halfway through the BMW Chase, they stopped the movie and decided to go see what the other teams were up to now that most of them had arrived. Soon, Orlan decided that he should go off into the woods towards the river to explore, despite that Aedan had warned him that there was a fast flowing river nearby. If he drowned or was lost, that was on him.
Meanwhile, Orlan was stumbling through the bushes when he heard the river and voices coming from nearby.
Hopefully his presence didn’t interrupt anyone…
To Be Continued (As Always) (Side note: This will continue in an interaction with @variationofvariables’s characters.)
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Team Mravolinski-Chitco
Team info: 2022 Shitbox Rally - Out of This World! (Stage 1) - #30 by MrdjaNikolen
This is response to last part
Slow and steady wins the race, right?
Firing up the engine for first leg of journey was very exciting experience, it was done relatively quickly and hopes were (somewhat) high.
With Chicota taking care of driving we sure would show good performance.
At first it seemed like it, since this underpowered truck would manage to hit 135 kmph (83.9 mph) at places, impressive considering its not made to handle that well and has 156hp moving over 2600 kg, passengers/us included.
At least we enjoyed the breeze caused by our fast movement and that makes this hot humid day bearable…up until the point where there was loud thud from back.
Or rather, two thuds, followed by quite some spinning and going almost off the road.
Quick and sudden switch to reverse had made us leave the road completely, if a tad bit too close to few trees in surrounding forest.
Chicota recalled hitting some nasty bumps with rears few kilometers ago at great speeds, prob bcos of going around that carriage we saw there.
Since he havent exactly slowed down and was sliding the vehicle few times, wasnt hard to figure out how and why rear tires had failed, not to mention they seemed to be in their last legs anyway.
We should be quick to return to running, right?
I mean we have two spare wheels avaiable and they were indeed quickly prepared for getting into place.
As always in situations such as this, we blame Pi and her drive to be useful, particularly as sorta jack.
This meant, unfortunately, further glide into forest until we found somewhat of a natural ramp so Pi can get kinda under the vehicle.
Needless to say, this went well, as in Pi did get under the rear end of car and rear wheels were indeed off the ground, so Klimentol and Aydar had adequate circumstances for replacing the wheels.
Moving Pi from under the car did required some heavy lifting from Aydar afterwards.
You know, Aydar AKA the member who should have done holding rear end in air in first place.
We could have employed actual jack but, ya know, we would then need to get properly hard surface below it.
Road itself was out of question as hard surface, since few competitors had zoomed past with great speeds.
Since i was trying to get some breeze by driving a bike on side of road, i was one acknowledging their zoom via immense fear for my life, which meant another vehicle of ours ending up of the road and in forest (afaik bicycles are also considered vehicles).
Happily, this one happens to not weigh touch bit over 2100 kgs and can literally be powered by one regular, if a tad lardy, human such as myself.
Pi is stubborn individual…and very physically broken after holding rear end of heavy car with her back.
If she havent hurt herself while holding the car, she would definitely do so assisting said vehicle exiting the forest by trying to tow it, although once again not much was actually contributed.
It did happened few times that car would roll back, pulling Pi back as well.
Pi’s genius idea of using herself as anchor behind a tree wasnt contributing either to her own health or movement of car back towards a road.
After Pi had assumed her position in cab (yes, somehow she was still able to kinda move) we continued, spending lot of time on this simple thing.
We are not sure as to how we will repair those rear tires, but they are replaced so we are (probably) good - same concern goes for certain four-legged member.
Me and VerBanka decided to ride on bike bed for remaining of trip to allow hurt Pi as much space as possible, bike being on Pi’s bed instead.
Ok ok, we partially opted to take bike bed bcos she started to smell very similarly to certain dark red liquid, which was too much for VerBanka’s nose and i opted to join her bcos i like to spend time with her.
And yes, Pi will likely stay lying on rear bench since thats where her presense would be of least issue for others until Klimentol and Aydar decide to fix her up and transport her to her bed, where there is more space for operation.
This time it was natural breeze that made living bearable as we joined the camp.
Happenings of camp will be left for other time
2 Likes
TEAM HILLBILLY ROLLERS
Earlier parts
PART 0.1 - A prologue to the prologue
PART 0.2 - Another piece of the prologue puzzle
PART 0.3 - Viva la IP 4Z!
PART 0.4 - Robotman
PART 0.5 - Interference problems
PART 0.6 - Can I play Tetris?
PART 0.7 - Tangerine and familiar
PART 1.0 - Now things got serious!
PART 1.1 - Hello, Thibault and friends!
PART 1.2 - Poor kitty**
PART 1.3 - Curse you, Team Oil Crisis!
PART 1.4 - Interlude
PART 2.0 - Bird bird bird, bird is the word!
It was now very near the time of the race start, but our team woke up in the tent, at least 66% of it.
JANNE: “Marie, wake up!”
MARIE: “…hyyyuuuurrrrgggghhhh…”
JANNE: “MARIE, NOT NOW!”
ANDREAS: "The damn race start is in a couple of minutes and we are not going to miss this just because you were stupid enough to drink out of a jerry can yesterday!
MARIE: “…hyyuuuuurrrggghhhh…”
JANNE: “We don’t have the time for this. Come, help me put her into the van!”
Janne and Andreas managed to get Marie into the middle of the bench seat in the van, where she managed to fall asleep against the dashboard, more precisely against the button for the dixie horn which seemed to scare the crap out of a couple of the members of theam Mrezhari when it went off.
MARIE: “UUUUUHHHH what’s that noise, I can’t sleep.”
ANDREAS: “YOU SHOULD NOT SLEEP NOW, YOU FAT WRECK! Turn off the damn dixie horn before I go insane!”
MARIE: “It already sounds like if you are insane, TBH”
After switching the dixie horn off, Andreas and Janne managed to take down the tent and put it back in the rear of the van, when they got back in the van it was quite cramped in the cab, though, with the cat from yesterday occupying the centre position along with Marie.
ANDREAS: “That beast is leaving the van, now!”
MARIE: “Naaaw, little kitty ain’t going anywhere. He is cute.”
ANDREAS: “Cute? For fucks sake, that beast has six legs and is the same size as a goddamned pitbull.”
JANNE: “Yeah, about as cute as Marie. Now, will you or I try to chase this beast out of the van…”
Janne and Andreas was looking at the cat for a while before making the decision that it was not worth fighting and being shredded to pieces, and let the cat stay in the van. Actually the race start went kind of well, even if a kind of banzai start threw some mud at the Union Magistrate that seemed to have trouble with the starter. However, Andreas saw in the mirror that the Magistrate finally seemed to get along, so there was no point in turning around and offering them any help. After a while, Marie was starting to wake up, too.
MARIE: “Uhhh…who farted?”
JANNE, ANDREAS: “Not me!”
MARIE: “Oh, crap…”
JANNE: “Hey, it really stinks in here!”
MARIE: "Uhhh…I think nobody have learned our little friend about cat litter!
ANDREAS: “Well, we need to stop for refuelling soon, I guess we can try to wash your clothes then…sigh…why do you always cause some kind of trouble, Marie?”
The team stopped for refuelling, and while Janne tried to wipe off the cat feces from Marie’s clothes with some washer fluid, Andreas chased away the cat to the woods with the axe that was stored in the back of the van.
MARIE: “Poor kitty…”
ANDREAS: “Don’t say another word!”
Despite the fuel stop, it seemed like the team was still far ahead in the pack, but the troubles were far from over.
ANDREAS: “IT STILL STINKS!”
MARIE: “Can’t we stay in some town and buy some little tree air freshners?”
JANNE: “Do you really think that little trees are sold here?”
MARIE: “Uhm…yes?”
JANNE: “It really wasn’t a question, just so you know.”
ANDREAS: “I CAN’T STAND THIS SMELL! We need to stop and take some air before I throw up. Sigh. Will it be like this for the whole race?”
Standing at the side of the road, multiple teams were starting to pass the van, happily waving at our team.
ANDREAS: “This is humiliating”
JANNE: "Hey, look at these bushes growing at the other side of the ditch!
The team had found some small, evergreen bushes that did not look much for the world, actually they were rather ugly, but the scent…oh, the beautiful scent of them.
MARIE: “How is this possible, they smell as good as little tree air fresheners, and yet, they are just…NATURE?”
JANNE: “I’ll cut some branches and put them on the dashboard, that might tone down the smell of cat feces a bit.”
It turned out that the small branches actually completely took away the smell of cat feces, actually the van had a wonderful smell on the inside now. The bad mood from earlier went away, fact is that every team member was rather happy now.
JANNE: “Could you turn on some music, Marie?”
MARIE: (laughing) “Yeah, that will be just cool.”
JANNE: “HAHAHAHA, BIRD… IS THE WORD!”
ANDREAS: “Ohhh…how cool… do you know that…the bird is the word”
MARIE: “Ohhh…yes and…everybody is talking about the bird…”
JANNE: “Because the bird is the word! Ohh…this is so clever, let’s put this track on repeat!”
Now the van was driving at a rather slow pace, and most of the few teams that still was behind started to pass the van now. When Team Machinas con passiones passed, the discussion started.
ANDREAS: “Look…at the lunatics. Why, just why?”
JANNE: “Why are they driving so fast?”
ANDREAS: “This pace is just…cooooool!”
MARIE: “They probably just don’t know that…the bird is the word.”
JANNE: “And why is the maniac in that steam locomotive driving so fast?”
ANDREAS: “He has never heard that the bird is the word. Ohhh, did I tell you how beautiful it smells in the van now?”
JANNE: “Yeah a good thing we found those bushes.”
MARIE: “HAHAHAHAHA BUSHES!”
A while later our team came to a dip in the road. They stopped and enjoyed the beautiful sight of the dip in the road for a while, drove it over at walking speed and kept driving towards the camp, finally parking near Team Shift Happens. When they opened the doors of the van, a scent probably familiar to Shift Happens was spreading towards them, as well as The Trashmen on full volume that nearly caused a meltdown of the 15 year old stock speakers in the van.
JANNE: “HEY, MALAVERA, YOU KNOW WHAT? THE BIRD IS THE WORD!”
ANDREAS: “Yeah, how clever! Jayde, they have found out that the bird is the word!”
MARIE: “Kayden, it might actually be hard to believe but the bird is the word!”
JANNE: “How did you get here so early? You must have been driving like complete maniacs!”
TO BE CONTINUED
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Team Shift Happens
Previous Chapters:
It’s Go Time! - Starting Party 6 PM
Boldly Going / Through the Rift / Arrival in Jaduvira - Stage 0
When the Hell are We!? - Stage 0 Campsite
Out of His Damn Mind - Stage 0 Campsite
One Hot Night / Letters from the Past - Stage 0 Campsite
Over the Hill and Through the Woods - Stage 1
Viravalli Campsite
Malavera looked back as Janne shouted at him that “the bird is the word,” then sighed. He had a mighty headache starting to brew in both heads, and shouting was the last thing he needed.
Likewise, Jayde and Kayden exchanged a look of confusion at the strange phrase.
When Janne asked how they got to camp so quickly, and said they were driving like complete maniacs, Kivenaal pointed to Malavera. “We got here so quickly because this big fucker in the van put his foot on my gas pedal and pinned it straight to the floor. It’s not easy keeping a van under control when all you can do is steer, because the brakes are shit and stomping on the clutch is just going to blow the engine apart,” Kivenaal said.
Meanwhile, Jayde caught a whiff of something oddly familiar, shaking his head and groaning. He rummaged through a large bag at his left hip, eventually pulling out a book on medicinal plants, flipping through the pages, and stopping on a well-drawn picture of the same bush they’d encountered. “This is a Mercy bush,” Jayde said, holding the book out for the three of them to see it. “Did you three eat any of the little quill-like leaves?”
Marie shook her head. “No, but it smells good! It’s edible? We brought some with us! Can I go eat it now?”
Jayde groaned. “I know how you feel right now. When I lost my leg, I was eating the quills of a Mercy bush for weeks. Even the smell can have an effect on some people. No, don’t eat the bushes, Marie.” He walked over and grabbed the branches off of the Freeway Star’s dashboard and promptly placed them far away from the camp. “Don’t put them back in the van, please. They smell nice, sure, but they’re a very powerful medicine. Someone could eat those and not care if someone takes off their leg.”
When he got a whiff of their van after removing the offending plants, however, he realized why they’d done it and cast a basic cleaning spell over the interior. Not just did the cat shit smell vanish, several other rank odors vanished as well, and the seat lightened up a few shades. He put his book back in his bag, rummaged around a little longer, and pulled out a small clump of dark blue pine needles tied together with yarn. “These are safe, they’re just pine needles from the Rift. A good strong scent, but not an unpleasant one,” he said, hanging the bundle from the van’s rear view mirror. “I use several of them to keep my bag of holding from starting to smell.”
(@Knugcab I hope I got Marie’s character right here. Also, I hope the new air freshener works well for your team, and that they appreciate the small amount of cleaning Jayde managed to do.)
3 Likes
Team Slow
Chapter 2 (Follow-up of Part 1 post), Part 2, Are we there yet?
Our Earth made cars feel like things of the Dinosaur era in this planet, where everything is ascending past current innovational limits
After the painful cobble roads, which was well rectified in a luxury car, as per travelling for 355.2mi (or km), We only had to stop once, in-spite of German cars being known to be unreliable, the XL53 was going hard through the non-Earth terrain, Could it be as reliable as a SUV? Who knows.
Tonight on this episode of Slow Machines, totally not slow.
Our all-terrains start disintegrating as they are 10 years old and pulled out of some junkyard, How did they not break apart? Good question.
John cleans the injector system during the stop to improve longevity of the car, and puts it back together, and does a oil change.
Matt comes back from the grocers in his newly acquired e-scooter to get food for the team, and the car with music playing from outside the scooter and it goes off after the scooter is off.
The scooter, despite being bought off an Crugandan?? (clarification needed) marketplace for 350 Crugandr Money
M: Damn, it really is cold here, but this scooter, it is quite fast, don’t you think?
J: Why the fuck did you buy a scooter? After Matt looks at him dead in the eyes that he really did buy a scooter
M: So i could do short distances, no?
J: Where are you gonna recharge your scooter?
M: The power grid in the camps. As much as i do use the power grid for my crypto mines back home. I could afford this bill
J: Your crypto mine broke
M: Oh, Matt goes and throws away a bit of trunk carpeting for weight reduction
TO BE CONTINUED.
(OOC, just a few clarifications. Crugandr is in the steam era. We are far more advanced than they are. Think American Wild West or Gold Rush era. So, if they bought anything off of a Crugandrian, it might have two wheels and be propelled by foot, or if a local tinker got creative, a miniaturized steam engine, but not electrical power. And 350 silver Syrkals (their coin of the realm) is expensive for a push-scooter, but cheap for anything powered. And, as for the weather, Crugandr is tropical. As in, rain-forest hot.)
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