2022 Shitbox Rally - Out of This World! (Results Out!)

Team Mravolinski-Chitco

Team info: 2022 Shitbox Rally - Out of This World! (Results Out!) - #30 by MrdjaNikolen

This is reply to last part…again

Bang, beep, clank and hunt

This was quite the night.
We cant exactly say it was particularly good tbh either, thanks to efforts of…something.
Fact is that we were awoken by two loud BANGs, caused by Magistrate crashing into few other cars and to make matters worse, someone decided to express their displeasure by revving the engine and blaring the horn.
Obviously, chosen words that we thought about such annoyances werent expressed to Lombaxes and, as it turned out, host team (someone there decided to rev and beep) but you can bet they werent very nice.
At some point tho, we identified reason for beeping and revving was likely related to Union’s team, so they were ones responsible for entire fking mess.
We were too tired tho to discuss that atm with culprits and just hoped thats it for the night.

It was
Happily for both them and us, morning had revealed that, whatever happened, wasnt exactly planned by them and seems like accident of sorts.
(As you already know, dear reader, it was indeed accident.)

Klimentol decided to drive this time and so we hopped in, expecting fast and uneventful drive.
As was the case on first stage…there was a problem after some bump.
Lot of CLANK, BANG, TICK and few others had came from our cargo areas, which after stop and deeper observation was attributed to quite a bit of cargo coming loose and wrecking havoc.
We wouldnt need to stop at all if not for fact that some cargo actually ended up on and around road itself, so we decided to scoop it up.
On move yet again

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEP

-TF?
Mystery has revealed itself when we noticed Hillbillies passing. This was greeting, which we can find acceptable, less so since they passed us.
Not much later…

“TEAM HILLBILLY ROLLERS TO TEAM MRAVOLINSKI CHITCO, WATCH OUT FOR THE ROAD IN FRONT OF YOU, IT IS JUST AN OILY MESS NOW, PROBABLY VERY SLIPPERY, WATCH OUT!”

Chicota: “Seems we are gonna regain position.”
Klimentol: “Maaybe, but we should still be nice and stop if they need some help. Since im driver, im gonna decide on stopping”
Janne decided he could deal with this himself tho, which was indicated by waving at us to pass.
Klimentol:“Ok then, we can continue regardless.”
Pi: “Eh. You sure they will manage to fix it?”
Look, i have trust in Janne and his ability to do stuff. He seemed very sure waving back there. Not sure how much his teammates could assist, but eh.

This wasnt pleasant weather at all, being very hot. Once again, we could rely on presence of water to cool us down, but dogs seemed to get idea or two that were unrelated to water.
Pi had gone hunting with them, while Chicota once again went to town with a female, this time only him working for resources - VerBanka’s job was to be pretty, which she did very well.

Hunt was successful, gathering solid amount of raw meat in process from some small animals they encountered in forest. More other food for VerBanka and me is greatly appreciated news and there was plenty when those two came out of town.

I was simply enjoying water, joined afterwards by rest of group.
This proved satisfactory and tiring at same time to such extent that i even struggled to get to car bcos mix of fatigue and amount of hauled ass.
Since VerBanka assisted, i really couldnt complain, but did meant im gonna use bed tad bit earlier than planned.

Lovely being that is Marie decided she had enough of encounters with Oil Crisis (Magistrate had also hit their car last night) and, according to Chicota, was “fking drunk”, so Kaylie had role of stopping Marie from applying oil to fresh air intake
It was only fair for female dealing with female and both Pi and VerBanka lack substance and strength necessary to handle Maria.

Meanwhile, Pi had heard about…yes, she wasnt only non-swimmer that had jumped into water and kinda drowned.
She started thinking she might be more reasonable with her thinking than most of MCP team, including Giacomo, one that also almost drowned on previous camp site.
Shivers were sent down her spine knowing she might not be stupidest person in camp…and that Giacomo actually leads entire team.

Lets just hope this night will be more peaceful…

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Addagarda, Garda Province, Crugandr.

Local time: 6:36 - 6:46 Sun

Weather: Still hot as hell.

Written in collaboration with Madrias

The Green Crystal


K’mino found himself a quiet spot away from everyone, where he could get some meditation done, without the jolts and bumps caused by driving. He sat down on a log in the shade and took in the air through his nostrils. It was a pleasant afternoon, the sky a light blue as the sun beamed down on the camp. The heat was not a bother as the fur was designed to insulate and the humidity… was less bearable but at least it wasn’t as bad as it was back on the coast. The light breeze was partially to blame for it.

Once K’mino got comfortable he sat up straight, shut his eyes and began to meditate. The wind and the sound of the river filled his ears, complete peace had befallen the spot where he’d begun meditating.

A voice then broke through the peace of the afternoon. “You were always the observant one.”

“It was always that way, master. I’ve not changed since the last time we met. Why have you come to speak with me.”

“To remind you of that story I told you”

“The little lion that you met I assume?”

“Yes, he was strong with the force, I had never seen such strength before especially with someone as young as him. I was unfamiliar with the region and as I was following a lead on my pursuit of one of Darth Sidious’s underlings I had to ask someone for directions. I gave him a green kyber crystal since it would not be likely he would encounter a Jedi again. I’m certain that he kept it.” The voice said.

“Did you tell me this because you felt that a person named Jayde Malradi was strong with the force as well?” K’mino asked.

“Of course. You and him are strong with it almost as equally. It turns out that it was true that the kyber crystal he has and his power with the force would bring him good luck.”

“Will it do the same for his team?”

“It will, I have seen his other powers, and he’s very skilled with them. I know that he’s very likely a fast learner.”

“Will the force bring good luck to my friends?”

“Well, they aren’t force sensitive, but it should only take one.”

“Well, If the force brings good luck to my team, then–.”

“May the force be with you and them.”

K’mino chuckled, “May the force be with you always, Master.”

Unbeknownst to K’mino, Jayde had been standing there behind him, watching.

“I’ve heard something similar a long while ago.” said Jayde, making K’mino open his eyes and look behind him. The lion man walked over and sat next to him, then gave a bit of a sigh, clearly working up the courage to tell his story.

“What would that be?”

"That’s what I’m going to tell you. You see, I was five when someone came to the town of Bittrenn. His clothing was… unusual. Close to some of the things I’ve seen mages wearing, but not quite right. Tan robes, brown boots, somewhat heavy-looking cloth cloak. He asked me if I knew who he could talk to if he wanted to track down some bad people, so I pointed him to our jail, because Lynn was our Guard Captain, and she kept a long list of people who were wanted for various crimes. I remember he reached into a pocket, which moved his cloak aside, and I saw what looked like an ornate metal hilt, but… There was no blade or mace or axe attached. Just the hilt. I remember he handed me a crystal or a gem of some sort, and it was pale and colorless. I wish I could remember his exact words when he’d handed me this.” Jayde fumbled for a brief moment with the clasp of his golden chain, then pulled it free of his mane, revealing the emerald-green gem hanging in a loose coil of golden wire. K’mino’s eyes widened.

A kyber crystal?

“But I know he told me it would bring me good luck,” Jayde said, not noticing K’mino’s surprise and holding it out for him to get a better look. “I carried it in my pocket for less than a day when it started to turn green. In a week, it was that color, and that’s how it has stayed for the last 30 years. I was so afraid I’d ruined it that day that I didn’t dare ask him what it meant, even though he stayed in town for a week. Even though I’d crossed sticks with him when playing. I’ve never seen anyone move so fast and so fluidly in my life, and I was proud the one and only time I caught him on the wrist with my stick. It was barely a glancing blow, but he still told me I had won that fight.” Jayde took a light breath, then said, “The next day, he was gone, and I never saw him again. When I was ten, I took what little coin I had to a local jeweler and asked him to put that gem on a chain for me. No spells, nor any tools could harm it, so he wrapped the widest point with wire to hold it.”

K’mino grabbed the crystal hanging from the necklace that was in Jayde’s hand and examined it. Without a doubt it was a green kyber crystal, possibly the same one his master had given to that child years ago.

“Thirty year later and you finally have got an answer. This is a kyber crystal, it’s used in the construction of a lightsaber, a weapon we Jedi wield.”

“A lightsaber?” Jayde asked. “I know a saber is a type of sword, and I suppose they could be a bit heavy, so a lighter saber would, perhaps, be more convenient. But I don’t remember seeing a sword, saber or otherwise,” Jayde said, seeming puzzled. “Maybe I wasn’t paying attention. Or maybe I was still thinking about how many rocks I could put on top of the outhouse before Lynn caught me doing it again.”

As K’mino handed Jayde his crystal back, the kyber crystal, Jayde then asked, “It is safe to keep wearing it, right?”

K’mino chuckled. “Yeah, it’s completely harmless when it’s not been weaponized. And a lightsaber is quite light but that’s not why its called like that. Because this kyber crystal is used to create a beam of plasma or light that can cut through anything.”

“Light that can cut,” Jayde said, looking momentarily lost in thought. “Considering the few times I’ve accidentally hit the crystal with sparks and it glowed painfully bright, I am really glad I never seriously considered the plan to focus a bolt of lightning through it,” Jayde said. “Plasma… So, somewhat like Kayden’s plasma pistol? That fires a ball of light that can turn sand into glass.”

“Yeah sort of, usually a lightsaber is just a metal hilt with a blade that is either blue or green, or red if you are a Sith lord. I can show you mine if you’d like.”

K’mino removed the metal ornate hilt from its spot on his belt and pressed the button on the side of it. The lightsaber fired up producing a triumphant sound that would have easily been mistaken for an energy weapon firing. The blade was a shade of icy blue and it hummed ominously as K’mino held it. When he moved the blade, its hum changed in pitch from the motion. However, the heat that radiated from it was not as intense as Jayde had expected.

Jayde stared at the weapon, shielding his eyes against the cold blue light until they had a chance to adjust, though once they had, he had to admit to himself that it was an incredibly elegant looking weapon. “This almost reminds me of that time I tried to freeze a lightning bolt to use it as a sword. Didn’t work as well as I’d hoped,” Jayde said, though with a look of deep concentration, he attempted it once again. A half-muffled thunderclap rang out as Jayde aimed in a safe direction and let the bolt fly, then used the same energy he lifted rocks with and summoned his staff with to capture it.

Unlike the lightsaber, the heat was much more intense, and the look of concentration on Jayde’s face showed it wasn’t something he could do for long, but the yellow-white bolt hissed and crackled as Jayde moved it. He released the bolt and it fizzled out with a quiet snap. “It takes too much concentration to do that for it to be useful, but, well, it was easier to show that than it was to try to describe it,” Jayde said.

The lightsaber made another strange sound as it retracted. “Well, you’ve got a kyber crystal, so if you can find the other components, you’d be able to have a lightsaber of your own. But you’ll need a little bit of training before you can engage in combat with it.” K’mino explained.

As the lightsaber’s blade retracted, Jayde studied the metal hilt for a moment longer as K’mino mentioned that if he could find the other components, he’d be able to make one of his own design, though he’d need training before he’d be able to use it in combat. “Understandable. Considering I was never much of a swordsman, I know I’d have a lot to learn on that.” He put his golden chain back around his neck, the kyber crystal once again hiding in his mane, then said, “I’ll leave you to your meditation. I’d do so myself, but…” Jayde trailed off for a moment, finishing with, “I keep feeling like I’m being watched.”

K’mino watched him leave, uncertain of what this meant. Perhaps it was something to do with the forest they were in or he sensed the presence of K’mino’s master. Whatever it was, he hoped that nothing bad would happen to them and resumed his meditation.


To Be Continued (Like Always)

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TEAM HILLBILLY ROLLERS

Earlier parts

PART 0.1 - A prologue to the prologue
PART 0.2 - Another piece of the prologue puzzle
PART 0.3 - Viva la IP 4Z!
PART 0.4 - Robotman
PART 0.5 - Interference problems
PART 0.6 - Can I play Tetris?
PART 0.7 - Tangerine and familiar
PART 1.0 - Now things got serious!
PART 1.1 - Hello, Thibault and friends!
PART 1.2 - Poor kitty
PART 1.3 - Curse you, Team Oil Crisis!
PART 1.4 - Interlude
PART 2.0 - Bird bird bird, bird is the word!
PART 2.1 - D. Head
PART 2.2 - Good night!
PART 3.0 - Freeway Rockstar

PART 3.1 - DISCO TJO DISCO HEJ

JANNE: Thanks a lot, Jayde. Enjoy your meal, now I have to go back to the van and mount this oil pan!

Janne went away and started wrenching on the van, but heard that there was a fight going on between Andreas and Marie, “as usual” he thought, but still. He crawled out from underneath the van and almost laughed his ass off when he saw Marie’s new haircut. “Wonder what have happened now”, he thought, but went back wrenching when he saw that Kaylie had Marie under control now.

MARIE: OH yeah, like WE are the team that are sabotaging for THEM? They have tried to kill me multiple times and now they have obviously smashed our side door in too, but yeah, I am the one sabotaging here! All right! I get it!

Marie shook her head (which exposed her new haircut in an even more glamorous way) and went away, if this had been a cartoon she would probably have had a thunderstorm above her head now. She went away to the van and cranked up the stereo very loud so this song was heard all over the camp.

ANDREAS: MARIE, IF YOU DRAIN THE BATTERY YOU WILL HAVE TO PUSH THE DAMN VAN TOMORROW UNTIL IT STARTS, AND I PROMISE YOU IT WILL TAKE A WHILE SINCE IT IS AN AUTO!

MARIE: LALALALALA I CAN’T HEAR YOU!

Janne got out from under the van, being in a less charmant mood.

JANNE: MARIE, TURN THAT DAMN THING OFF, I CAN’T HEAR WHAT I AM THINKING!

MARIE: I CAN’T HEAR YOU, THE STEREO IS TOO LOUD!

Janne tried wrenching while the voice of Eddie Meduza was spreading all over the camp, finally getting the oil pan in place.

JANNE: GET OFF THE FRONT SEAT YOU FAT WRECK, I HAVE TO FLIP IT UP SO I CAN FILL OIL IN THIS BASTARD

MARIE: Don’t shout at me, you will hurt my precious little feelings.

Janne was once again almost laughing his ass off. “Oh well, at least you have some humor left even when you are drunk and angry. Your so called feelings is about as precious as a cactus growing in a field of rocks, so get your fat ass off the seat so I can fill some oil!”

Marie left the van, Janne turned off the stereo since he didn’t want to get deaf while doing work inside the cab and hoped some battery would be left. He tried to start it up and it cranked and started like it should, the oil pressure light shut down immediately after start, so everything was calm. He let it run for a while to charge the battery and then went back to team Racing Stripes and for that matter team Oil Crisis.

JANNE: I am very sorry for her little outburst. She always causes trouble in one way or another, and I don’t know why.
ANDREAS: Yeah, right. Yeah, sorry. I tried to stop her but she has a will that is made of titanium reinforced granite, I think. Where did she go, by the way.
JANNE: I don’t know and I hope I don’t have to find it out in the worst possible way.

TO BE CONTINUED

(OOC, Eddie Meduza - Wikipedia - might be interesting to read, to get some clarity in why Eddie Meduza and his work is cult among the people like the members of this team)

@Madrias @TheYugo45GV

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RK Series Racing; Stage 2 Drive

Note: this segment has kindly been co-written by @Executive. I simply copy-pasted her writings with minor changes to formatting.

The second morning wasn’t much different from the first. Breakfast was, once again, rather primitive, with Valentin electing to skip it altogether. He insteads spends the better part of 20 minutes generously brushing his hair elsewhere near the car to avoid bothering the others while eating.
The tent was packed up, stored and the now-broken front bumper gets reborn as an ornament, now that it is strapped to the roof.

Not soon after, the team sets off. As agreed, Connor was driving, Tim next to him up front. Both Schrants are folded up on the rear bench, with Constantin having shuffled over to the left, allowing Valentin access through the only working rear door.

The first 45 minutes were rather calm, as Connor went cautiously to verify that his dry-shifting of yesterday evening actually translated into proper operation when in motion. This also allows Valentin to catch up on his breakfast.

“Vote to pick up the pace. This still is a race of sorts.”, Tim suggests, turning around to see the other’s reactions.
“Yep.”, the other two unanimously reply. To them, speed wasn’t an issue as they had what was quite possibly the most extremely min-maxxed driver in history as well as previous experience going fast on less-than-perfect roads, sometimes with substantially less protection around them to boot.

“How much faster do you want me to drive?”, Connor asks, as “faster” might also mean an added 2MPH, not really gaining them anything.

“Full tilt?”, Tim replies, more as a question to see if the ones in back were fine with it.
“Full tilt.”, Constantin confirms, smirking at the thought of some action happening. Valentin nods, not wanting to kill the fun. Not that speed wasn’t fun, but when he went fast, he usually was sending it down a mountain road on a road bicycle.

“What does ‘full tilt’ mean?”, Connor has to inquire, as he’s not exactly proficient in youth-speech.
“Just go as fast as you think is manageable.”, Tim replies, not sure as to how fast that would end up being.

Immediately after that, Connor’s right foot falls to the footwell carpeting. The car picks up speed, albeit slowly, when the next corner comes around.

Connor practically turned into Takumi Fujiwara, sending the car round the loose corners much faster than all the others would have even dared to do. Adding to this, Connor manages to conserve a lot of speed, only using the brakes when necessary and four-wheel sliding every turn with surgical precision.

Morale was high, and a little more than an hour into the stage, something BAD happened elsewhere along the road:


[Start of the cooperation with Executive]

Back at Stage 1 Camp

As the trees started swaying in the strong winds of Viravalli, the campsite was seemingly quiet until it was broken by the bellow of a wild animal.

Ed: “AAAAANDYYYYY!!!”

Soon enough, the team was on the road to the next campsite, down a road that almost resembled the conditions of a Scandinavian rally stage.

Somewhere by the side of the road, about 20 miles ahead of Team RK Series racing.

Ed: “I can’t believe you did this to me whilst i was sleeping.”
Jay: “You should’ve seen your face when you woke up and saw yourself in the reflection of your phone!”
Andy: “Well either way, now’s not the time to argue, this road is a real bastard to drive, hope you aren’t bumping around too much back there.”
Ed: “Andy can you not drive perhaps, a bit smoother?”
Andy: “Well, I don’t know if you can see the road ahead of us considering you have glasses on your-”
Ed: “You drew them on in permanent marker.”
Andy: “Either way, we’ve got quite a while to go.”

Small stones and dust flew behind the Carica’s rear valance, with the 3BE-EGDK buzzing along contently through the somewhat smooth driving of Andy’s hand, however it wasn’t long before something rather odd happened.

Andy: “Uhh, guys?”
Ed & Jay: “Yeah?”
Andy: “Something’s not right, the car feels a bit-”

Suddenly, all power is lost and the car is blaring a soft but loud beeping noise followed by a robotic Japanese voice from the dashboard.

Andy: “Well shit.”

Andy popped the bonnet of the runabout and started to poke around the bay, whilst Jay fetched the service manual from the glovebox he was told came with the car. However…

Jay: “Mate, all of this shit is in Japanese, how are we supposed to figure it out??”
Andy: “Well, uhh, umm, we can piece it together, just find the page with the wiring diagrams and take a picture of it, we have nowhere to put the whole book.”

Wiring Diagram Picture

Ed: “Whilst you two do that, I’m going to try get someone to stop and help with that walkie-talkie in the dash cubby, maybe someone can help.”

Ed switches on the strange device and begins to try each and every channel to try and call for help.

Ed: “Hello? We’re a bit stuck over here, somethings packed up in our car and we don’t know what to do.”

Meanwhile, in the Tangerine Tank of RK Series Racing, Connor was absolutely sending it for half an hour already with the others in the car more or less vocally rooting for him. The Dione’s relatively softly sprung four-corner double wishbone suspension did well in soaking up the bumps and impacts from the gravel road that they were somehow doing nearly 70MPH on. His smoothness prevented anyone from emptying the contents of their stomachs into the footwell. Then, a voice was heard from somewhere in the car. It sounded like someone was calling for help. All three human team members start looking around, trying to locate the source, which eventually devolves into intense scrambling of every nook and cranny accessible from the passenger compartment while seated. Eventually, Tim was holding a walkie-talkie, from which the calls for help are coming from.

“Where did you get that from?”, Valentin asked, not aware of anyone having bought the thing.
“Bought it together with our food in case this was more of a circuit race. Phone bill was fucking expensive after the bout in Sweden…”, Tim replied moving his attention to the device.

Distant voices of Jay and Andy swearing and trying different things with the tools they have can be heard as Ed describes the situation to the voices over the device.

“I dunno if we’re ahead or behind you guys, but if we see you, make yourself known and we can try and help.”, Tim speaks into the device, holding it firmly while pressing the transmit button.

Ed: “We’re in a White… what car is this again?”
Jay: “Look at the badge on the back, you silly sod.”
Ed: “A white Hakaru Carica, if you see us give us a shout.”

“Will do!”, Tim quickly replies back into the device.
“I hope their car isn’t totaled. We don’t have the space for another team.”, Valentin remarks in a worry.
“We’ll see once we get there…”

It doesn’t take all too ling before the faded Liftback four-wheel drifts around a wide left-hander onto a straight, at which point Connor spots the Hakaru in question. Tim also can make out a white car in the distance: “Gotcha!”, he shouts with the transmit button pressed down, but before any reply can be made the car already made it’s way over there. Connor, with pinpoint accuracy, pulls off an amazing case of threshold-braking, stopping their “Tank” just past the stranded team with enough space on the left to allow other, slower cars to pass as well.

Tim is the first to get out and greet the others, followed soon after by the other three.

“I heard you car went poof?”, he smirks, taking a look at the white Japanese hatchback.

Ed: “Hi there, yes our-”
Andy: “Let me take care of this one mate; Hi there, I’m Andy. I’m the leader of Team Gearknobs and this is our shitbox. Which is broken.”
Jay: “Who made you the leader you prat?”
Andy: “Anyways, we’re not sure what’s happened here but it just wont start.”
Jay: “You reckon the two tall musclemen fellas can just pick up and carry our car for the rest of the stage?”

The initial impression was rather mixed. Constantin was not very impressed with the self-centered introduction of Andy, crossing his arms and mildly shaking his head as a result. Neither was Valentin, but the confusion about him being called a “muscleman” was even more pronounced. Tim sees this as casual banter between friends and thus doesn’t think of it too much.

“Tim. Pleased to meet you. Also, we have Connor, Constantin and Valentin around.”, Tim speaks, passively assuming the leader role with little resistance as he was the owner of the car. While doing the introduction, he motions to the respective other members so that the others knew which name belongs to which person.

Connor, in the meantime has taken note of the synth-voice coming from inside the car, effortlessly translating it into English. He decides to not tell anyone yet, as the introduction was not yet done.

“We don’t know what happened either, but maybe we can figure something out…”, Tim adds, taking a glance at the propped-up hood of the Hakaru.

Andy: “Nice to meet you guys.”

Andy shakes hands with the other team in an enthusiastic, over-the-top manner.

Andy: “It sort of cut out power abruptly, we hadn’t even hit anything or anything, I’m clueless really. We’ve got a service manual but its all in Japanese, this car is an import so.”
Jay: “You got any tools you lot? All we’ve got is a bit of a basic toolset, nothing much really. We’ve checked over the obvious for now, but it’s like trying to figure out a plate of spaghetti.”
Andy: “If one of you can come round here, the fuse box is under the passenger side wing and its a bit fiddly.”
Ed: “I’ll go make everyone a cup of water.”

The handshake is done mostly without a hitch. Only Connor’s handshake may have felt a bit weird or unnatural to Andy.

“We don’t have a whole lot of tools either. Spanners, wrenches, screwdrivers and such, sure. But welding, soldering or anything that requires a proprietary tool is a nope from us.”, Valentin explains, revealing his calm, surprisingly high-pitched voice to the others. “Though as far as i know, Connor can do Japanese.”, he adds, casually pointing at him across his right shoulder.

“Yes.”, Connor replies, waiting a bit for the synth-voice to repeat it’s line once more. “Your car has suffered an electrical fault. Disabling electrical system.”, he recites in unison with the robotic voice coming from the Hakaru, thereby proving his capabilities to everyone on scene.

Synth-Voice, as played in the Hakaru, Japanese only

Tim smirks at the other team’s members, mildly proud of the technological masterpiece he’d been lugging about for the better part of a year now.

“Mind if i take a look at it?”, Valentin asks. “Both the manual and the car itself, that is.”

Andy shuffles towards the glovebox of the car and promptly gets the service manual out, bringing it over to Valentin with a cheery smile. The service manual has a few notes written in Japanese on the pages from the previous owner in black pen, mostly on the wiring diagram pages.
Ed shortly comes out from behind the boot of the car and sets down a case of water bottles on the ground with a small fatigued grunt, and then gets in the back of the car for a nap.

Andy: “Ed, you want a pillow or something? They’re in the back of the car, next to the spare oil.”

Ed reaches over to the boot from his seat inside and takes a small pillow, fluffing it up a bit, before yawning and laying down on the back seat. Meanwhile, Andy hits his head on the bonnet going back to the dashboard wiring and is a bit miffed by the situation.

Andy: “Ow fuck, that hurt a bit… Anyways, ahem everything is still intact on this side, anything weird in the bay?”

The service manual is promptly passed on to Connor, as Valentin is not able to read Japanese. Connor starts flipping through the booklet, looking at each page for what was at most a second. Handing the manual back is prevented by Valentin taking a dive into the engine bay in an attempt to figure something out. As such, Connor holds onto it for now.
The case of water is quickly looted for a bottle each by Constantin and Tim. Valentin doesn’t bother for now, as his lanky nature allows him to deal with heat better than most others.

“So… it just died an now won’t start, right?”, Valentin asks with his head next to Andy’s under the bonnet of the stricken car. His massive, blonde haircut practically blinds him, also covering most of the rocker cover and it’s immediate surroundings in the process. Some Swedish expletive can be heard as he, unsuccessfully, attempts to clean the bay up by tucking his hair behind his ears. This results in it shifting a bit and him having full eyesight, but the rocker cover still looks like some tacky fur-pattern seat cover.

“Do you have a rubber band i can borrow…”, Valentin asks, visibly annoyed, popping back out of the engine bay.

Rummaging around through the stash of supplies in the boot, Jay tries to find a rubber band for Valentin. All he finds a roll of duct tape, and grimaces for a second to think if this will work.

Jay: “I’ve found some duct tape if you’d like to use that, but- oh, hang on a second!”

Beneath a fold of one of the linen sheets was a small piece of flexible rubber piping amongst a sea of shimmering metallic clamps and other spare hoses/pipes. Jay breathes a sigh of relief, and puts the tape back. Once again he runs around to the front of the car, before handing it to Valentin. He looks at his long, well-kept hair and worries about it getting dirty from the innards of the bay.

Jay: “You want me to grab you a towel for your hair, mate? Don’t want it getting dirty!”

Having heard about the duct-tape, Valentin flinches, as it wasn’t meant to repair the car. Once Jay returns, Valentin looks at a bit befuddled, having expected to get some kind of an O-Ring, which he planned to use to tie up his hair a bit. He straightens himself back up to his full 7’3", facing Jay.

“Anything that’ll keep my hair out of the bay will do, thanks. A Towel won’t do much good if it’s covered in oil.”, he states, once again moving his hairdo out of eyesight.

Meanwhile, Connor walks up to Andy, holding out the service manual toward him.
“I think i should return this.”, He says, clinical and calm as he always is.

Constantin just casually takes the occasional sip out of the supplied water, knowing that he cannot be of much help. The same basically applies to Tim as well, with both of them looking at the happenings from afar.

With a hand on his head and releasing a defeated sigh, Andy takes the service manual back to the glovebox of the car, placing it back above the rest of the paperwork. He glances over at Ed, who is fast asleep, and gets in to think about what the team was going to next. Leaning out of the doorframe, he shouts out to Jay to ask if there was any news.

Andy: “Anything new come up mate? It’s been a while, and I’m worried if we’ll get anywhere as of now…”
Jay: “Not sure, nothing’s really happened, and it’s all a bit of a mess, I reckon we’ll be here a while longer to be honest.”

Andy removes the cap off the bottle of his water, and washes his hands a bit after messing about with bits and bobs in the engine bay, taking out a book and starts reading it in the passenger seat. Meanwhile, Ed wakes up and yawns like a housecat waking up after 16 hours of lazing about, deciding to clean up the boot and organizing everything after the rough roads jumbled everything about.
As soon as the manual was handed over, Connor walks over to the driver seat of the car. Stood in the open door, he looks inside, his view going back and forth between the interior and the engine bay.

“Am i correct in assuming that the dashboard is powered, but the vehicle’s starter motor is inoperable?”, Connor asks, using wording more complicated than necessary.
Tim takes note and translates his question into a more dumbed-down alternative: “Does the car crank if you turn the key?”

Valentin up front has found a solution and is now crouching in front of the car, lowering his viewing angle to the point at which his hair is not of concern anymore. Unfortunately, he is none the wiser, as he rarely works on fuel injected cars and the only intricate electronics he is proficient in is motor-battery units of electrically-assisted bicycles.

“I’m sorry. I don’t have an idea on what to do up here. Maybe some percussive maintenance, but that’s about it…”, he groans, looking at Andy in the car through the slit created by the open hood at the base of the windshield.

Andy: “The car won’t even turn over, it’s properly buggered, but everything on the dash works, even the radio see?”

Andy turns on the stereo, which had a disc of Phil Colemans’ top hits inserted, with the volume set quite high and loud. He quickly turns it off embarrassed, and proceeds to keep turning the key in the barrel, which results in nothing happening apart from the dashboard beeping every time it’s turned on.

Ed: “What on earth was that!!??”
Andy: “Nothing, don’t worry about it… anyways, it doesn’t turn over and I’m guessing this bodes unwell for us?”

Ed stands back and looks at the organized, clean space he has made in the boot, and closes the hatch, taking a swig of water whilst Andy hides his beloved CD in the drivers’ doorbin.

“Huh… Starter motor or so…”, Valentin starts, before being deafened by Phil Collins Coleman.
“[Swedish expletive]”, he exclaims as he jerks about in fear, as do the others in response to the impromptu disco jam.
Connor, meanwhile, took the info to reference his now-internal copy of the service manual, getting a slew of possible faults. “Vehicle entertainment works, but won’t start. Possible causes: …”,Connor says, continuing with a list of at least 20 entries denoting what could be the cause of the car’s behavior. He practically reads that straight from the service manual, in a similar way a text-to-speech program would, albeit with a much less robotic sounding voice.

“That sure is good and all, but where do we start?”, Valentin asked, yielding no response as the service manual seems to have listed the causes in no particular order.

“I know, coming from electrically assisted bicycles that the lights and all still work if the battery is nearly dead… might be that.”, he added, clearing out the obvious stuff first in hopes of striking gold.

Andy: "I’m afraid it cant be the battery, because that was replaced in the service in Nevada; it’s a brand new BARTA brand battery too, reputed for good quality. "

Andy takes out the auction sheet, pre-inspection papers and service schedule, showing that almost every regular service part was replaced in the garage back in the USA, stamped clearly with markings denoting the parts used.

Jay: “So what is it then? Everything else works in the car, it’s literally just the engine, how odd…”
Ed: “Maybe the garage fitted the battery wrong?”
Jay: “That would only happen if you fit the battery, Ed.”

The trio think about their situation for another time, and once again come to no coherent conclusions Andy jokingly remarks again about how they should’ve brought an OBD II scanner with them on this journey, but secretly wishes that they had brought it with them, as it would help greatly in this situation.

With the added info, Connor is able to rule out the vast majority of the probable causes listed.

“Fitting the battery with incorrect polarity would immediately destroy the electrical system in it’s entirety. The vehicle would not have started the event in this configuration. The only reasonable causes that remain are all related to the Engine Control Unit. The fault is likely to be found there.”, he explains with confidence.
“Yup. Seems plausible. But we cannot really help with that… no soldering iron and all that.”, Valentin admits upon hearing that their ECU likely is toast.
“Well… what now?”, Tim asks, “we cannot help fix it and the car only seats five.”
“We could tow it.”, Constantin suggests, finally uttering his first few words since arrival. His voice was similar to Valentin’s, but a fair bit deeper.
“Towing the Hakaru would exceed the rated towing capacity of our vehicle by a factor of two.”, Connor states, aware that it would dampen team morale, but the anaemic 1.6 of the Brick would’ve struggled hard to get going anyway.

“Well… sorry we can’t help…”, Tim utters in defeat, looking at the still-broken white hatchback sat beside the road.

With the inevitable circumstances, the the trio headed back into the car and sank into their seats. The other team muttered some things about the issue but in the end, the team was not going anywhere, anytime soon. What was once a small, quick hatchback now became a big broken paperweight, beside the forest-y gravel road. Ed, Jay and Andy thanked the other team for trying to help them and going out of their way to stop.

Andy: “Thanks you guys, for stopping to try to help us even though we haven’t really got the right stuff to fix anything, we’ll be trying to get somewhere with this hopefully.”
Jay: “I’m sure it’ll be fine hah, we have some bodging to do anyways.”

An agitated Andy now begins to put his face in his hands and groan into them in pain.
Team RK Series Racing was equally bummed out that they still were stranded. Constantin heads into the back of the Dione. goes into the trunk, keeping it open with his left hand as the gas struts aren’t really useful anymore. He digs out a pair of Water-Filtration-Straws and tosses them into the case of water bottles Ed has placed down previously.

“If you end up staying longer than your case will last you, those will help you not die of food poisoning when you inevitably use the river to quench your thirst.”, Constantin explains, at least securing their water supply for the time being.

“Well… There’s little point in sitting here now, is it?”, Tim asks, getting non-verbal agreement from both Schrants.
“At least there’s a few more teams coming up. Maybe they can help.”, he adds in an attempt to get their spirits up.

Soon after, they wish them good luck in fixing the car… or getting it fixed. The team takes their respective seats in the Dione, with Connor driving and they slowly pull away from the white hatch, flooring it soon after once they are fast enough that the engine cannot cause wheelspin anymore.

[End of the cooperation with Executive]


A few minutes after having taken off, Connor was back at it, sending the Dione across the gravel path at 70+MPH, sometimes even breaching 80.

“Too bad we couldn’t help them… now they’re stuck waiting for someone else.”, Valentin mutters, looking out the window as the tropical landscape passes by.
“We’re not helping them by being stood next to them doing jackshit.”, Constantin sternly replies, visibly annoyed at Valentin’s emotional sensitivity.
“We tried out best and couldn’t fix it. There’s a number of teams behind us. Some of them apparently can do magic, so they’ll be fine.”, Tim says, turning around to the distraught Valentin for a few seconds.

Valentin just sighs in response.
Eventually, the poor morale wears off, with the remaining drive being nothing special, apart from the blistering speed, that is.


OOC:
anyone want to do a quick segment about the Dione spectacularly passing some other car?
more closely thinking of the few teams immediately behind me, those being:

Team Blazers @variationofvariables
Team Black Rabbit @Tzuyu_main
Team Slow @interior
Team Spy Kids @SheikhMansour

(also all the other teams between RK Series Racing and The Gearknobs, if you want)

5 Likes

All of you are so creative, this is amazing! The collaboration, the essays…it’s beautiful.

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Team Slow
Chapter 2, Part 3, We’ve gotten absolutely f*king dusted!

As the hours went past, the very humid weather, the car being able to cope with it (perhaps seething)
We never broke down once, however have gotten sprayed with gravel by an rally car, We have tried to speed up to it, but have never been able to beat it. Then we get sprayed by a Dione that is 120mm off the ground, we try to speed up in our land yacht going at 56MPH on average.

In-spite of it being a yacht, it was more efficent than an average yacht, and more reliable than a certain Italian car, as the car never skips a beat once during Stage 2, as the Dione starts blazing past like a rally car driver is behind the wheel and never breaking a sweat once.

Meanwhile as the hackjob 4WD Of the XL53 reaps its benefits yet disadvantages, And then the car itself gets dents and dings from getting sprayed by several cars going at absurd speeds on the bridges. The 6 hours of driving must be purely tiring, but weight reduction paid off, just by a mere 25 kilos, the lesser electronics, the mroe reliable your car is.

@Elizipeazie

(No dialogue for the time being)

3 Likes

fair enough

maybe they could meet up at camp afterwards

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Team Spy Kids: Stage One

(Yes, this is a week late)

Team Spy Kids knew that the terrain for the rally would be difficult, but they didn’t expect it to be so… otherworldly. Nor did they expect their competitors to have fur, or two heads. At least they wouldn’t have to deal with carburetors, unlike the snow leopard holding a “Carburetors for Dummies” book next to a lifted 70s crew cab that, like several of the vehicles in fact, seems to have already been camped in overnight.

Of course, first they had to enter the other world, known by Aetherii. More specifically, they would be going to a land known as Crugandr, which according to Malavera the giant two headed werewolf was a tropical land that hadn’t yet advanced beyond the steam age. Which meant they probably wouldn’t be able to fix their air conditioning if it broke. At least Lazar had the sense to bring a window unit for camping to accompany the air con already in the car. Anyway, after a few hours of driver briefings, lunch, and general waiting around, the portal opened with the setting sun behind it. Unlike the circular portals of fiction, this one resembled barn doors opening into the dark night of Crugandr.

The road onto which they rolled was a dark, dusty cobblestone affair. There was enough grip for Jessica to drive with ease, but the solid rear axle did no favours for comfort, with only the softness of the suspension allowing the passengers respite from the cobbles’ constant vibrations. Shay opened her window for a bit to feel just how humid the Crugandran atmosphere was, and then promptly closed it upon being assaulted by the saturated tropical air. Being near the back of the convoy, the team was also able to see several vehicles ahead of them get assaulted by something more solid, in the form of six legged big cats. Lazar first opined that the fifth leg he saw was a massive, shall we say, organ, but then Alexis pointed out the sixth leg on the other side.

Other than the cats, and Machinas Con Passione’s fuel economy woes (seriously, they had two fuel stops for a 180 mile journey), they made it to their campsite near the city of Jaduvira without trouble.


It was soon after sunrise, yet the heat was already bearing down on the competitors, helped only by the wind. Alexis and Lazar, the latter woken up by his complete inability to sleep in the morning heat, packed up the tents while Shay and Jessica cooked breakfast. They weren’t given long to eat, however, before Rukari shot his starting gun to signal the true beginning of the Shitbox Rally. While most of the field sprinted off to their vehicles Le Mans style, Jess and Shay spent a minute or so finishing their breakfast in the Elbrus’s boot before sauntering to their seats. Jessica then made up the time by pinning the throttle for practically the entire 355 mile stage.

Other than a single refuelling stop, the Elbrus spent nearly the entire stage at around 5,000 rpm in top gear and around 110 mph, only Jessica’s driving precision and Alexis’ navigation between them and a fiery death at the stump of a tree. Somehow, the sheer speed along the cobblestone roads wasn’t the scariest thing on the stage. That honour would go to the sudden dip near the Viravalli campsite, the Elbrus hanging in the air for just over a second before crashing down to Aetherii. Somehow, the KGB machine and its occupants survived their short flight, and when they eventually arrived at their camp they even still had all of their belongings present and mostly secured.


Over the next three and a half hours (or two and a quarter Aetherian hours) the rest of the teams rolled in, some worse for wear than others. With the sun essentially straight up in the sky, Jessica stripped down into a bikini and walked into the river for a swim, and Alexis soon followed her. As they floated along the bank of the river they spotted the girls of Team Blazers skinny dipping in the distance, and Jess in particular homed in her sights onto a blonde woman with some rather significant endowment. Of course, they kept a low profile and a long distance, Jess wishing she had her binoculars on hand. Sadly, their sightseeing was cut short as the black panther swimming with them shot a spell at a brown furred competitor and the Blazer girls left the water.

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Addagarda, Garda Province, Crugandr.

Local time: Somewhere between 6 Sun and 8 Sun

Weather: Still hot as hell.

@Madrias @Knugcab

Marie's Antics


There was a commotion that came from behind the team as they ate, with most of them turning around to see that a large… organ had been painted on their car, and the culprit was climbing up the front bumper only to be stopped by Andreas.

“Hey! Stop holding me back!” Marie shouted, struggling to keep her balance while fighting Andres’s grip.

“You weigh 135 Kilos, you will probably go straight through the hood of this rusty mess!”

Team Oil Crisis watched in amusement, forgetting about the certain reproductive organ drawn on their car. Andreas kept trying to hold Marie back as she tried to climb up the bumper. Marie finally managed to break free until her right foot slipped out from under her causing her to fall off the bumper dropping the oil all over herself.

The entirety of the Oil Crisis group burst into laughter and chuckling as karma had caught up with Marie.

“Don’t you even think about getting in the van like that now that we’ve gotten it cleaned!” Andreas scolded, grabbing Marie and cutting off many of the oil saturated parts of her hair off with his knife, leaving what could only be described as an abomination.

The Members of team Oil Crisis continued chortling, until Marie raised her voice.

“That’s it! I’m going to kill them!” she shouted, to which Aedan responded by placing a hand on his holster where his Desert Eagle lived.

“Seriously! Anyone please help, I need to keep her calm before she does something stupid!”

Kaylie then walked over her chrome hand shining in the sunlight. “Hey! Do we need to fight here?”

Whatever she said next was ignored as Aedan turned to Orlan. “Go get the degreaser and erase that phallic object from the rear door please. Make sure you don’t make a mess, use the cardboard or something.”

The day went on and it was peaceful for the most part until someone started blasting music. But that was quickly stopped and the peace returned. Hopefully it remained that way…


To Be Continued (Like Always)

3 Likes

Team Shift Happens

Previous Chapters:

Over the Hill and Through the Woods - Stage 1
May the Moons have Mercy on Them - Stage 1 Campsite
Helpful Friends are Helpful - Stage 1 Campsite
Tune-ups and Tech Talks - Stage 1 Campsite
Having Mercy on a Missing Teammate - Stage 1 Campsite / The Missing Teammate - Written by TheYugo45GV and Madrias
Sleep? What is that? - Stage 1 Campsite
A Rude Awakening - Stage 1 Campsite
Another One Bites The Dust - Stage 2 Run / Stage 2 Campsite
Repairs / A Good Meal - Stage 2 Campsite / The Green Crystal (Written by TheYugo45GV and Madrias)


Addagarda Campsite, 2 Moon

Kayden groaned as he laid there on the bench seat of the Bricksley. The heat was bad, sure, but he hadn’t realized how much worse it was in the truck than it was in the damn tent. Even with the windows open, it seemed like no wind was getting into the truck.

Worse was the damnable fog that drifted in, making it humid as hell, too. How Kaylie had slept in here, he’d never know, but he knew for a fact that someone else was going to be car camping later. Eventually, he found a spot that was almost comfortable and ended up falling asleep.


Kaylie, meanwhile, was deep asleep in her brother’s old tent. For the first time since the Rally had started, she was actually getting some much-needed rest.


Malavera was sleeping deeply, courtesy of being up too damn late the night before, and having called it an early night when the nicotine withdrawal headaches started. As much as it had helped him relax, he had regretted it afterward.


Jayde sighed. He was getting some sleep, but was spending a lot of time laying there awake, getting the feeling that something wasn’t quite right. He rolled onto his left side and tried to relax, eventually drifting back off to sleep.


Rukari was barely asleep at this point. Given the number of shenanigans that had happened already, he was sleeping lightly in case he had to personally deal with someone causing trouble. He startled awake as something sounded awful close to someone aggressively ripping fabric, before hearing Kivenaal in the next tent over complaining, “Really? Which one of you assholes farts louder than a damn train horn?”


Kivenaal had been getting some rest before the deafening blast-from-the-past had blared out from Jayde’s tent. Sure enough, a few minutes later, he heard a sharp whoosh from Jayde’s tent as Jayde had woken himself up, smelled what he’d done to the air in his own tent, and cleared it with a basic wind spell. He hoped that would be the last of it, but then again, he knew there was a chance that one of the teams still had pranks to play or revenge to be had. He just hoped he could sleep through it.

1 Like

Addagarda, Garda Province, Crugandr.

Local time: 1:75 Moon

Weather: Still hot as hell.

Night Patrol


Orlan sighed, why did he have to be the one who slept first. It didn’t look like this night would be like the others, a dense fog was rolling in and the heat wasn’t giving in. But, at least it was peaceful. Something could be out there, but hopefully it didn’t come near the camp. Though if something did, he’d be the one to wake everyone up. Reluctantly, Orlan stood up from his seat on the rifle crate and walked over to his backpack from which he retrieved his flashlight. Then he returned to the rifle crate, removed the M16, put the sling over his shoulder, retrieved a spare magazine and a 40mm grenade which he put in his pockets. His shift was up in three hours, might as well make the most of it. Taking a deep breath, Orlan entered into the forest, hoping nothing would try to kill and eat him.


To Be Continued (Like Always)

2 Likes

Team Mravolinski-Chitco

Team info: 2022 Shitbox Rally - Out of This World! (Stage 2) - #30 by MrdjaNikolen

This is reply to last part

Doing switcharoos in bed

“This was a bad idea.” someone shared their wisdom related to removing long wide object from its previous position, ofc never having proper opportunity to use this long wide object.
It was lower part of some rear bench of sorts, likely from something big, now finding its use as kind of bed.

Two boxes with some things in them were moved to leave more space for this bed.
And yes, yet another member of team decided they dont want climbing every time they wish for some shut-eye.
VerBanka was observing this activity from safe distance, big enough distance to not be included in doings of job - ironically, this whole thing WAS her idea.

It soon came to attention that attaching this bed directly to fuel tanks below it would not be a smart idea.
Enter the forest then go through it, and at some point you will encounter some lumberjacks.
One of them had thought of confronting this lovely duos of relatively big dogs with equally lovely axe he was using as both tool and intimidation device, until he realised he already confronted them earlier.
They were asking him of a favour of finding something they could use for their bed and he kinda had idea of finding some weirdly chopped wood piece that can do it.

After searching through stuff and encoutering many different shapes and patterns, there was one that really seemed fitting.
There was some negotiation as to how dogs would pay for this, until two things became clear

  • We have 3 packs of some sticks filled with nicotine
  • This particular lumberjack tends to use his smoke pipe a fair bit.

Ofc this resulted in interesting scene where lumberjack took some smoke from his pipe, now fueled by mix of some of cut-up sticks and his usual thing.
He was kinda satisfied, so we went and installed wood piece in car and bed on top of it.

Space taken up by said bed earlier was now occupied by two boxes of things we removed to make space for another bed…in bed which already has one bed in its center and one bed to its side.
With some more wire there was correction of thing or two and this job was done.

Happily, this might turn out to be only modification that our team does on car in Crugandr (surely would be only one that wasnt really done out of sheer necessity) but journey is long and possibilities exist.

Humans and Chicota went for a swim, Pi went around the camp getting updates on rest of teams and dogs were doing check-ups of stuff.

This lasted for several hours, then our group had garnered around our car, did some dinner and assumed their positions for sleep.

So far so good, everyone thought as dreams took hold on place of reality…

2 Likes

RK Series Racing; Stage 2 Camp

The team arrives at the campsite after having passed several other cars in the process.
To their amazement, only four other teams have been present before the Tangerine Tank rolled up.
It is agreed that they shall stop on the road facing the forest and set up camp there.

The process of setting up their communal ring of camping chairs and such is completed without an issue and a conversation is started regarding the broken-down Hakaru.

“Wonder if they have gotten it fixed yet…”, Valentin questions to himself.
“They’ll surely find a way… somehow…”, Tim replies, not totally sure either.
“Worst case being them getting a tow from someone who actually didn’t buy an underpowered brick. They’ll make do.”, Constantin reasons. Or… attempts to, anyway.

The discussion is soon discarded and the three spend most of the afternoon playing various card games, before heading to bed.


just a short blurb this time around.

@interior mind moving our dialogue to the next camp or something? i don’t want to take control of your characters and portray them incorrectly.

3 Likes

Sure.

2 Likes

Team Shift Happens

Previous Chapters:

Over the Hill and Through the Woods - Stage 1
May the Moons have Mercy on Them - Stage 1 Campsite
Helpful Friends are Helpful - Stage 1 Campsite
Tune-ups and Tech Talks - Stage 1 Campsite
Having Mercy on a Missing Teammate - Stage 1 Campsite / The Missing Teammate - Written by TheYugo45GV and Madrias
Sleep? What is that? - Stage 1 Campsite
A Rude Awakening - Stage 1 Campsite
Another One Bites The Dust - Stage 2 Run / Stage 2 Campsite
Repairs / A Good Meal - Stage 2 Campsite / The Green Crystal (Written by TheYugo45GV and Madrias)
A Good Night’s Sleep? - Stage 2 Campsite



OOC: So, funny thing about the post: It’s 32k, just about exactly. It will be immediately following this one. This is just so I can still have previous chapters over it. Sometimes this happens when three people get together on writing an idea.

Also, as a fair warning: This post will contain a battle. Reader discretion is advised, but we tried to keep from being graphic. However, there are mentions of blood and gunfire and a lot of very angry creatures.

If you want to be involved in the fight, there are enough enemies to do so, but just keep in mind, not a lot of people would want to get tangled up with what we’re fighting.

This goes live today because Stage 3 goes live tomorrow on schedule, and if I put this up early on Monday, it’d be lost under Stage 3, and people would be wondering what battle they missed when some characters reference it in the future.

So, thank you for your patience, good readers.



2 Likes

Team Shift Happens


Written with help from @Elizipeazie and @TheYugo45GV. Thank you both for your help in making this better than I could have done alone.


Addagarda Camp, 4:75 Moon

The shrubbery crunched under foot as Orlan trudged through the undergrowth. Sleep had refused to come to him. It was better to embrace the insomnia than to resist it, and besides, if trudging through the undergrowth with an assault rifle strapped to his chest didn’t tire him, what else would? He shone the flashlight into the trees as he continued walking. It was extremely eerie and almost felt as though someone or something was watching him. That woman in the town had said something about leaving and not angering the ‘wolves’, perhaps she was crazy, perhaps she was not, but in any case the darkness of the forest and the thick fog that rolled in was not reassuring in any way, and there was that sense of dread that something might be watching. The crunches of leaves and branches continued to resonate throughout the forest as Orlan walked. No threat, maybe that old lady was crazy. Now would be a good time as any to exact revenge for that rude awakening on day one. Yes, revenge⸺. A snap of a branch somewhere behind him ended the thought.

He turned, sweeping the flashlight’s beam across the forest behind him. Who in their right mind was playing tricks on him again? It’d better not be another spell to the face. The rustling of bushes drew the light’s beam over a log where some dark shape disappeared behind it. The sound of the river behind him filled Orlan’s ears, which twitched uneasily. Subconsciously his tail curled inward expecting combat. Another rustle.

“Hello? Who’s there?” Something was lurking in the bushes near the log. “I am armed.” He said, bringing the M16 rifle on his back to his arms. The rifle’s sling swung from side to side as he inserted a 40mm grenade into the launcher. “I’ll say it again, I am armed, but I don’t want to hurt you, so could whoever’s there please show yourself.” Orlan ordered, making sure to be firm with his tone. A pair of glowing eyes and a dark shape became visible from behind the log.

Orlan felt his blood pressure skyrocket. “What the fuck are you?” The question was muttered to himself. “Go on, get lost. Shoo!” But instead of running the creature stood up and began to approach him. Fumbling for the assault rifle, he prepared himself to run. “Stay the fuck away from me!” His words fell on deaf ears. “I said get back!” The being approached him further but it didn’t get very far. The lombax froze, until the M16’s muzzle flash lit up the entire surrounding area as it spat 20 rounds of 5.56 ammo towards the creature. The tall wolf-like thing roared as a round lodged in its shoulder, taking it down. Orlan meanwhile took this opportunity to run for it.

“Oh shit, Oh shit! All hell has fucking broken loose now.” Another distant roar sounded through the forest. “Take this you abomination.” There was a satisfying pop as the launcher hurled a grenade, 30 or so feet into the trees. Orlan then plastered himself behind a tree, a mere second before the bang of the explosion rang out, echoing through the forest. Opening his eyes and peeking around the tree, revealed that something had happened but probably not enough to kill whatever was coming. Upon looking ahead away from the forest, Orlan saw the familiar rusty bumper and giant spare tire holder of the Union Magistrate. That was probably the fastest 100 yard dash one could make but, he had to warn the camp.


When automatic gunfire rang out across the camp, Kivenaal and Rukari were both awake in an instant, with Malavera taking only a few seconds longer. Then a loud explosion rattled the Bricksley’s windows, shook the tents, and woke up Kaylie, Kayden, and Jayde.

“What the fuck!?” Kaylie snapped, now wide awake in one of the tents, shaken out of the first bit of decent sleep she’d gotten in a few days. She got up and grabbed her wrench in her left hand. “Oh, that’s it, someone’s getting a wrench in the crotch tonight,” Kaylie snarled.

Kayden jolted awake in the back seat of the Bricksley, got out of the truck, threw his armor on and pressed the button on his katana as he drew it, the edge starting to sizzle, smoke, and crackle before a dim red glow spread through it. As that edge brightened, he held his blade in a defensive position that also worked as a decent source of light, especially once it reached the full glow of a harsh yellowish-white.

Between the gunfire and the explosion, Jayde was awake, but it was the roaring and the howls that really snapped him the rest of the way out of bed. “Which one of you idiots pissed off an entire den of Dyre!?” Jayde yelled, getting out of his tent and grabbing his staff from the truck bed. “The town even fucking warned us not to anger the wolves!”

Kivenaal sighed and checked his weapons. He had his revolvers with him, and after flipping up the lid on the toolbox, he grabbed the old western-style double-barrel shotgun with the stock-mounted ammo pouch, slung it over his back just in case, and prepared himself for battle.

Rukari loaded his murdaira with a double charge of powder and a lead bullet, knowing full well that he was going to need everything he had to take down any Dyre at this point. He looked over at Orlan, shook his head, and yelled at him in Valraad, “Zaruki!

Malavera grabbed his railgun from the toolbox as well, flipped the switch on for the thermal sight, dialed up the power just a little, and took a peek down range. “Oh, shit, that’s a lot of angry werewolves,” Malavera said.


The team in the Dione was asleep relatively soundly, mostly due to tiredness of the past few nights catching up to most of RK Series Racing. This well-earned sleep was harshly interrupted via firing of an assault rifle, immediately forcing Connor out of his night-time idle-state and Constantin awake. He immediately donks his head on the soft plastic of the Tangerine-Tank’s™ rear bumper, instinctively rubbing the impact site despite it not having hurt at all.

Not soon after, his light blue eyes dart around from under his crude rain protection others call a “tent”. Before he is able to spot anything, he is near-deafened by a grenade blast off in the forest, waking both Valentin and Tim up in the process.

“The Fuuck?”, a very groggy Valentin moans, vaguely looking into the forest through the nearside rear window. “Huuh?”, Tim follows up, equally tired and confused as to what is going on.

Constantin has since gotten out of bed, not covered in camo waist-up to make his sleeping accommodation more effective at retaining heat. He turns to Connor, still stood next to the b-pillar of the Dione, looking into the forest vegetation. “What’s going on here?”, Constantin demands sternly and wide awake, fully knowing some sort of gun having been fired.

Connor’s reply was stale, but accurate: “20 pieces of ammunition and a 40mm launched grenade have been discharged in the forest in front of us. One of the host team members mentioned hostile relations with a group or pack of Dyre. I do not know who or what they are.”
It takes a moment of mental processing, before Constantin realizes that the entire camp is now effectively at war because of some fucktard going too far into the forest. He takes a sprint to the offside rear door, flinging it open. Both Tim and Valentin stare back at him, before being shoved over to gain access to the middle rear seat.

“What the fuck is wrong with you!?”, Tim said, still half-awake but alert enough to vaguely grasp what is happening.
“For real… What’s going on!?”, Valentin chimed in, being in a worse state than Tim, as getting up in the middle of the night wasn’t exactly common for him.
“Gimme my bow, shut up and stay here.”, Constantin blares back, snatching his military backpack with the as-of-now-unstringed bow attached to it. Connor, meanwhile, also took note and pops his head into the car, sounding much more serious and stern than usual: “In order to ensure safety, i order you to leave the vehicle and follow me!”

In a state between tiredness, confusion and fear for life, the two occupants oblige, despite having not a lukewarm clue about what is happening. They are brought to a relatively safe location closer to the river, alerting the other teams to the situation.
“Please stay here and wait for further instructions.”, Connor orders, more sincerely than before in an attempt to calm then down.
Valentin and Tim, now wide-awake, are curled up behind the AST Elbrus, scared shitless and fearing for life.


Upon entering the camp, people were already stirring, his teammates included. Thankfully the gunfire and the explosion had managed to be a very effective alarm clock. Worryingly, only K’mino and Malcolm were walking around. The others probably didn’t hear anything and were still asleep. Soon it turned out they weren’t asleep but around the side of the car, readying their weapons.

"Which one of you idiots pissed off an entire den of Dyre!?” Jayde yelled from across the camp getting out of his tent and retrieving his staff from the truck bed. “The town even fucking warned us not to anger the wolves!”

Orlan looked in the direction of him hoping he wouldn’t be seen. A shout from Rukari in some foreign language meant that he had been spotted.
This was not a good position to be in. The whole camp was stirring but then something howled in the distance. All five Lombaxes tensed, their ears stiffening, tails coiling and fur standing on end.

Aedan reached for his holster, removed the chrome plated Desert Eagle and racked the slide, before returning it to its spot.

“What in the fuck have you done?” He said, turning to face his brother.

“Something attacked me, it ran at me and I opened fire. I heard more behind me as I ran and I sent a grenade their way.”

Orlan saw the anger befall his brother’s eyes.

“You did what!? You’ve put us all in danger, you fucking idiot! Did you not listen to what I told you when I arrived here?” Aedan hissed.

“I did! You’d have done the same in my situation.”

The tension dissipated when K’mino ran round the corner.

“I sense a disturbance in the force, something is coming.”

“No Shit!”

“Good, that means you are aware. But there is something very important you need to know, Malcolm! Pavel! Get over here!”

As if on queue, Pavel walked round the corner, Whiskers and Makarov in hand and Malcolm with the Walther rifle case. Gunther also crawled out from sleeping under the rear bumper. But the dog sensed something and retreated back underneath.

“As I was saying, this is very important to keep in mind. We are only defending ourselves, you must not bring pain and suffering to our enemy, whatever you do, you must kill the enemy as painlessly as possible. All five of us could very well join the dark side, even if the rest of us aren’t Jedi. Understand?”

The whole team nodded in acknowledgment.

I’ll say it again, there must not be any unnecessary suffering inflicted on the enemy. Am I clear?"

“Yes. crystal.”

“Good, keep that in mind, be on the defensive and watch your backs. May the force be with us all.”


When Connor crossed by the Highwayman with no weapon in sight, Kivenaal asked him, “Hey, Connor, you can use a double-barrel shotgun, right?”

Connor stopped, simply said, “Yes,” to Kivenaal, and shortly after found himself holding a traditional, double-barrel 12-gauge shotgun.

“Not sure if you’re aware, but some zaruki woke up a whole pack of Dyre,” Rukari added. Before Connor could ask for what one of those was, however, the question answered itself when a huge, 11-foot-tall gray-furred werewolf leaped out of the trees.

Kaylie snarled as the beast landed right in front of her on all four limbs. Acting completely on instinct, she swung her wrench at it, connecting with a brutal meaty crunch straight onto the top of the Dyre’s head. As the Dyre dropped to the ground, Kaylie stepped back, horrified at what she’d just done, and dropped her blood-splattered wrench.

Unfortunately for the group, the number of luminous amber eyes in the forest looking back out at them was all the confirmation needed that they were in for one brutal fight. Another wolf leaped out toward Connor this time, though it was clear that this one was leading the charge, as several more swarmed out of the trees.


Just then a wolf that was bigger than any canid they ever seen before, leaped from the bushes and landed in front of the Bricksley, right in front Kaylie who swung the wrench in her left hand as hard as she could and hit the Dyre right in the head followed by the crunch of its skull being shattered into a million pieces. The gray furred wolf slumped on the ground, as its life was swiftly ended. Meanwhile, Kaylie recoiled in horror at what she had done, dropping her bloodied wrench to the ground.

The surprise of Team Oil Crisis was cut short when another Dyre leaped from the woods taking Aedan with it. Orlan looked on in horror as his brother went careening across the camp but he could not help as another Dyre had come out from the woods and had begun trying to eat Gunther who was barking angrily at the beast from under the rear bumper.

Aedan tumbled across the ground, the giant Dyre knocking the wind out of him as it sent him tumbling through the camp. He’d have to kill this thing, there was no other way to survive it, but it couldn’t be merciless. The thoughts were cut short as the Dyre threw itself at him again, and it nearly trampled him before it jumped over him. Aedan fumbled for the Desert Eagle, wrestling it free from its holster right as the Dyre charged him, knocking him to the ground. It opened its mouth to deliver the killing bite but before the wolf could go any further, Aedan opened fire, putting all seven rounds of .50 AE through the beast’s head and mouth, the deafening kaboom like gunshots of the Desert Eagle ringing out in the night.


As soon as Connor got handed the shotgun, he breaks it open to load two rounds into it, just to discover that it is already fully chambered, at which point he aborts the process. Not long after, another Dyre takes a leap at a member of team Shift Happens, but appears to have misjudged the jump as it is directly heading for Connor instead.

In response, he takes some aim and hip-fires the borrowed firearm at the enemy creature, emptying one of the two barrels and obliterating the Dyre’s face in the process. He then manages to mostly dodge the now-dead, but still in mid-flight animal, only being lightly brushed by its fur as it passes by.

Constantin, meanwhile, got the equipment he needs and is rushing away from the forest to take cover behind the Bricksley.
“I need some time to prepare my bow!”, he shouts, with Connor remaining in defense of the Van that the Bricksley engineers turned into a crew-cab truck. He then goes about readying the only weapon he can field right now. As such, he puts a load onto it’s limbs to have enough room to place the string on either end.
The third enemy kill, accomplished by Aedan by means of a Desert Eagle led to Constantin taking a quick peek around the rear of his cover vehicle, which confirms that Aedan was still alive.

Meanwhile, somewhere further back in the camp, both Valentin and Tim were curled up, practically in tears over the thought of passively being engaged in a massive human-to-Dyre conflict.

At this point, Constantin is ready to fire and nocks his first broadhead arrow onto the string. In this moment, he thinks that it may be a good idea to secure some semblance of quietness by calling out his progress within his shooting cycle. As a result, he pops out of cover, standing behind the bed of the Bricksley and raises his bow to take aim.
DRAAAWWW!!!”, he is heard shouting as he draws the bow to full length, storing roughly 100 pounds of force in it’s limbs, string and, by extension, Constantin’s left arm.
It takes a good 20 seconds before the target is properly in sight, at which point he announces his shot by yelling “FIREE!!”, across half the camp. Immediately afterwards, the arrow is released and travels quite the way into the forest, eventually impacting a Dyre’s chest much further back in the enemy lines. He watches the arrow and it’s flight the entire way, over the Bricksley’s bed, past the Dione and some trees, maintaining proper form all the way until the kill is confirmed, as the wolf-like creature takes a few more steps before sliding across the dirt, not moving anymore.
REELOAAAD!!”, is the next state called out by Constantin as he ducks back behind cover to take the next arrow out of his quiver, which is resting by his right thigh and suspended via a sling across his left shoulder.

With Constantin reloading, Tim and Valentin away from battle fearing for life, Connor now is the only member of RK Series Racing actively engaged in the defence.


Jayde sighed. This was what he had feared the other day, that he would be forced to fight. Another Dyre charged out of the forest and immediately darted toward Team Oil Crisis, only for Jayde to throw his staff, striking it on the head and knocking the beast out. Another leaping wolf simply stopped mid-air as Jayde raised his right hand. As Jayde dropped his hand, the beast was violently slammed into the ground, knocking the wind out of it before Jayde’s thrown staff came back around like the world’s worst-balanced boomerang, hit the second Dyre on the forehead and knocked it out as well. Jayde caught his staff, relieved that the two Dyre he’d taken out so far were still alive, but definitely out of the fight.

Kivenaal found himself a little out of his depth when it came to actually fighting, emptying 24 rounds downrange and only managing to connect about half despite the size of the gigantic black wolf that was his target. Luckily for him, 12 rounds of .357 Magnum to the chest were effective enough to stop the beast before it could get closer, but he found himself retreating toward the Bricksley where Constantin also was, stuffing his empty pistols into his holsters as he moved. “Sorry about this, but I need a box,” Kivenaal said, dodging past Constantin mid-reload as he flipped open the toolbox lid, pulled out the cardboard box proudly labeled “Kiva’s Dirty Magazines,” and swung open the Bricksley’s driver’s door, plunking the box down on the seat. He pulled out 4 MP5-K submachine guns, slapped magazines into each of them, racked the charging handles, and unloaded wildly into the treeline, hitting absolutely nothing, but the sound of full-auto gunfire at least made him feel like he was doing something.

Malavera rested his elbow on the roof of the Union Magistrate, taking aim into the forest and breathing out slow and calm. He waited for the right moment, then curled a clawed finger around the trigger switch, a sharp crack splitting the night followed by a hard thump as a Dyre stumbled into a tree, having taken a thumb-sized steel rod in the chest.

Jayde cursed roughly under his breath as he realized two wolves had flanked them. Making a snap decision, he cracked off a bolt of lightning and killed the Dyre that was sneaking up on Constantin while he was reloading, leaving Kaylie to defend herself again.

Kaylie turned around as she heard what could only be best described as an explosion behind her, just in time to see a huge black wolf jump out of the shadows. Acting on instinct as the wolf landed in front of her and lunged at her to take her down, Kaylie grabbed its throat with her left hand and squeezed with everything she had. The startled wolf clawed at Kaylie’s arm, scratching the chrome in its last moments before blood ran down the slick chrome plating. Kaylie let go, staring at her left hand in shock.

Rukari blasted two wolves cleanly with his murdaira, and some shot winged a third, leaving it wounded on the battlefield. Kayden, having been close enough to overhear what K’mino had said to his own team, rushed over and ended the beast’s suffering with his blade.

“How long will those two stay down, Jayde?” Kayden asked, yelling to the huge lion over the gunfire.

“Until the sun rises,” Jayde yelled back. “Leave them be, they are no longer a threat.” Then as he saw Kaylie’s arm covered in Dyre blood, he groaned. “Everyone, listen up!” he yelled. “Watch out for blood splatter. If you’re wounded by a Dyre, or you get Dyre blood in your eyes, you’re going to have a real bad week. Trust me, I’ve learned that the hard way.” As another couple of wolves charged out of the forest, Jayde moved both of his hands, and the two very-surprised Dyre suddenly slammed into each other mid-leap, knocked heads with each other, were both knocked out, and landed on top of one of the previous Dyre Jayde had dealt with.

Kayden was having a real bad night already. Yes, he was trained for this, but he’d never faced a real battle before. His blade burned white hot, still sizzling faintly from the Dyre he had mercy-killed, while he moved to guard Kaylie and Constantin. They’d already had one flanking attempt, and it was almost painfully obvious that Kaylie was in no shape to keep fighting.

Jayde held his right hand out and summoned Kaylie’s dropped wrench to him, using a bit of magic to clean it before he dropped it into a pocket to give it back to her. Then he bared his teeth as Shadow, his six-legged cat, leaped out of the Bricksley, attempted to take down one of the Dyre on his own, and got thrown heavily into a tree. Jayde closed his eyes for a brief moment, feeling the life-force fading from his cat, and in that brief moment, gave in to his anger. The Dyre suddenly dropped to the ground after the first bright flash of lightning from Jayde’s left hand. Jayde leaped over the Bricksley, landing next to the beast as he struck a second time, the deadly arc striking the beast in the face. He turned his fierce green eyes toward the forest, sparks flying between his fingertips as he raised his hand to fry every living creature in the trees, only to stop as he remembered the conversation he and K’mino had shared the other day. He let his anger fade, the sparks between his fingers vanishing as well. “Too close,” he said to himself, “That was too close.”


Meanwhile, further back in the camp, Tim was losing it big time.
“WHAAAAAAHAHAHA!!! THERE’S WOLVES EVERYWHEREEEE!!”, Tim shouts as he gets up, sprinting towards the “brightly”-colored bit of cover that is the Anhultz Dione. This leaves Valentin behind, sat there, crying in tears as he curls up into a fetal position on the floor.

Tim hops into the car, and turns the key in a hurry. The car, being dependable as always, doesn’t fail him this time either as it springs to life without a hitch. “Fuck this, I’m not being ripped to pieces here!”, he exclaims, as he welds his foot to the floor, revving the absolute tits off of the 2.0 litre I4 before slamming it into first and dumping the clutch. Said clutch was saved by the loose surface, sending a wave of pebbles and small rocks across the battlefield as the car speeds off, away from camp. Constantin missed this entirely, as he was reloading from having missed his fourth shot, of which three hit, scoring two kills in the process. Connor only notices once it’s too late and the car is already on it’s way to god-knows-where. He decides to not tell Constantin to avoid disturbing him in his archery firing cycle. The concentration needed for quality archery also is the reason why Constantin doesn’t notice the Dione being gone in the first place.

Having nocked his fifth broadhead arrow, Constantin pokes out of cover again: "DRAAAAAWWWW!!"
Once again, the bow is drawn with top-notch form and absolute precision and smoothness in every single movement. The massive draw weight being pulled as if he was playing with a kids toy. His aim still is accurate, but slow, until he locks onto the target: “FIIRREEE!!” Another arrow whips across the battlefield as Constantin watches it, bow still held up and the left hand somewhere off to the side of his head. It impacts another Dyre further back, entering through it’s left eye and partially exiting through the back of it’s head, dropping it instantly.

Tim was barreling away from camp, right towards a totally unrelated pair of Dyre, resulting in him stomping the brakes, locking all four wheels. The animals just look at him with a deer-in-headlight gaze, prompting another panic-ridden scream from Tim. “FuckFuckFuckFuckFuckFuck!”, he repeats like a broken record, engaging reverse and flooring it once more, sending another wave of pebbles at the two organic roadblocks. Although Tim doesn’t notice any of this, he unintentionally scares them away with the rock-shower, as he is barreling back towards the camp.

Just like any other car, the straight-cut reverse gear aggressively whines while the Dione picks up speed, it’s pitch growing higher and higher together with the engine noises. Not long after, the Dione reaches it’s reverse top speed of 54KPH (34MPH), aggressively bouncing off the rev-limiter of the engine. This, coupled with the less-than-silky-smooth surface unsettles the car, which ends in Tim executing a very unintentional, but still impressive J-Turn. The slide sends a third pebble-wave of much greater magnitude away from the car, this time again into the battlefield, peppering Malavera and Connor with small rocks. Constantin also takes the beating, which causes him to lose his focus, aborting the shot in the process. “ABOOORTT,” he exclaims, less powerfully than the other commands as he is somewhat irritated by the sudden shower.


The gunfire continued to ring out through the night, and several more of the Dyre fell as they were hit with more bullets. One of the team members that were in the Anhultz had jumped in and taken off, returning not more than a minute later.

Orlan lit up another Dyre with a full magazine of 5.56 before moving to reload.

“Guys? I’m not sure we’ve got enough ammo to continue this fight.”

Pavel ran round the corner and took two shots at another Dyre with his makarov, wounding it.

Another kaboom came from the Desert Eagle. “We’ll have to stay behind so that everyone else can get going. We’ve got the most stuff to pack. Pavel, get Malcolm to help you load up the car.”

The giant nodded.“Understood. Malcolm! Help me get everything in the car, don’t bother with packing it up properly, just throw it in.”

Malcolm obeyed with no hesitation, and began tossing their gear haphazardly into the back of the car, with Pavel joining in by dismantling the tent and putting the whole thing in the trunk.

The three remaining teammates gathered round the back of their car to buy as much time as possible.


Malavera took aim through the thermal sight on his railgun, lining up a Dyre’s head in the crosshairs. The optic’s screen told him all he needed to confirm this would be a kill, as the weapon was fully charged, power was set to 25%, the target was well within range, and he had ammunition left.

As he prepared himself to get another kill, a roaring four cylinder engine shattered the silence of the night, followed by the sound of gravel flying. Looking to see what happened moved his aim just enough that he had to take aim again. Fate, however, had other ideas as the Dione barreled back into camp, spraying his back with rocks just as he pressed the trigger. A sharp crack echoed into the night as the steel slug left the weapon, striking a tree branch with a heavy thud. A few moments later, the branch fell and landed on the Dyre’s head, knocking it out. Malavera glared at Tim, though refrained from calling him out on it, understanding that fear could make people do stupid things, switching off his weapon as he realized that things were starting to calm down.


The Dyre didn’t take too kindly to the pebble-artillery barrage, and when combined with the high pitch noise caused by the reverse gear, it caused them to scatter, running off in all directions.

Tim is sat in the car, forehead resting on the steering wheel, accepting defeat. As he looks up, he’s ashamed of himself even more as he realizes that he had left most of his team behind.


With the battle now over for the moment, it was Rukari who took the leadership role that everyone needed right then. He climbed up into the bed of the Bricksley, stood on the sturdy steel toolbox, then yelled out for the whole camp to hear, “We need to move, and quickly! Pack up your supplies, get into your cars, be ready to go. We will regroup at Duskriver Village!”

Jayde looked around the battlefield and sighed. This had been a disaster. The town had warned everyone about the wolves, and someone had to go too far, too close to the forest, and start a fight. He hoped that no one in Addagarda had crystal balls and friends in other cities, or they might just be known as “those idiots who attacked a whole den of Dyre.” Worse still would be if the wolves attacked the town. When Rukari gave the order to pack up and get ready to leave, Jayde waved his hands and started gathering up the remains of the battle. Shell casings, shotgun shells, and arrows swirled around and landed in the Bricksley’s bed as Rukari jumped down. The tents soon joined the bed-trash as they folded themselves up, then crashed chaotically into the bed.

Kivenaal grabbed his shotgun from where Connor had dropped it into the dirt and dropped it into the toolbox along with his now-empty MP5-K submachine guns. Malavera, likewise, put his railgun into its carrying case, then put it in the toolbox as well.

Kayden had switched off his blade and was waiting for it to cool so he could put the weapon away, watching as Jayde, Malavera, and Kivenaal cleared up Team Shift Happens’ camp area. “The bed’s going to be a disaster,” Kayden said.

“We’ll fix it later,” Malavera said. “Right now, we need to get ready to go.”

Kayden looked over at Kivenaal and Rukari, both of them still breathing heavy and looking around as if they might be attacked at any moment. “Mal, I hope like hell you can drive stick, because those two aren’t getting behind the wheel in this condition.”

Malavera nodded. “Might be some of the roughest gear-shifts this side of the galaxy, but I can drive.” He got into the driver’s seat and cranked over the engine while Kayden slid himself into the middle of the front bench and Rukari took the last seat up front. Kivenaal and Jayde got into the rear bench, only for Jayde to get right back out, pick up Kaylie, and put her in her usual spot.

Kayden reached for the CB handle and clicked it on, then said, “We’re going to go first. If these beasts have blocked the road, we’ll break the road-block.” He reached back to hang the microphone back up just as Malavera jammed the truck into first and floored it.


Aedan saw the Bricksley disappearing into the fog followed by most of the teams. "Looks like almost everybody is gone. Just us and the orange car.”

Pavel meanwhile glanced at the Dione parked next to them. “We must wait for the Dione to leave before us. We’ve got better firepower, they can’t be the last ones to leave.” The sound of an engine starting and the slam of a door attracted their attention, which prompted looks in the direction of the orange liftback which was already speeding away.

A Dyre leaped from the woods, almost taking Aedan’s head off, but was swiftly put down by several rounds from the M16.

“We have to go now! I’m not sure how much longer we can hold out.”

It was now their turn to evacuate. Orlan, Aedan, Pavel and Malcolm threw themselves into the rear hatch, taking Gunther with them. They landed among the tent and other gear just as another Dyre tried to get into the car. It didn’t get very far as Orlan slammed its head between the Magistrate’s rear hatch and the C pillar.

“Get us the blazes out of here!” he shouted, slamming the door shut as K’mino stomped his foot on the throttle.

2 Likes

Given that Crugandr is supposed to be in the steam age, would they have developed 5.56 ammunition, or did Shift Happens bring their own? I assume .30-06 would be widely available?

1 Like

TEAM HILLBILLY ROLLERS

Earlier parts

PART 0.1 - A prologue to the prologue
PART 0.2 - Another piece of the prologue puzzle
PART 0.3 - Viva la IP 4Z!
PART 0.4 - Robotman
PART 0.5 - Interference problems
PART 0.6 - Can I play Tetris?
PART 0.7 - Tangerine and familiar
PART 1.0 - Now things got serious!
PART 1.1 - Hello, Thibault and friends!
PART 1.2 - Poor kitty
PART 1.3 - Curse you, Team Oil Crisis!
PART 1.4 - Interlude
PART 2.0 - Bird bird bird, bird is the word!
PART 2.1 - D. Head
PART 2.2 - Good night!
PART 3.0 - Freeway Rockstar
PART 3.1 - DISCO TJO DISCO HEJ

PART 3.2 - Van-Werewolf 1-0

After looking for Marie for hours, Janne and Andreas gave up and decided that they would have to go to sleep, and see if they could find her early tomorrow morning. Yet they were a bit worried about the situation.

ANDREAS: Fuck… If we don’t find Marie tomorrow, what are we going to do then?
JANNE: Well, don’t think so much about that then. She probably will come back when she is hungry. Or needs alcohol. That can’t bee too far away.
ANDREAS: What if the wolves eat her then? (laughing)
JANNE: Well… Suitable if they are on a LCHF diet maybe… If not, I don’t know.

Yet Janne and Andreas could not sleep very well since it was actually a bit worrying that Marie was gone. Finding her in Övertorneå municipality was rarely a struggle but this was not really the same thing. That lead to the two of them sleeping very light. Meanwhile, Marie woke up and saw that something really scary was happening. Since she was more or less running on the reptile brain at the moment after some gallons too much of Karjala, fight or flight mode was engaged, and for some reason she decided that fight was the solution. She ran to the van, and decided to start it to run down to where the werewolves were running. When the buzzy four banger woke up, Janne and Andreas did it too.

ANDREAS: FUCK, SOMEONE IS STEALING THE VAN!
JANNE: LET’S CATCH THAT LITTLE BASTARD

Janne and Andreas was running towards the van and managed to open the only working sliding door to jump into the cargo area. Looking through the lexan window in the divider wall, however, they could spot Marie’s hideous new haircut in front of the drivers head rest. Andreas started banging the wall so she should hear him.

ANDREAS: MARIE! Stop the van! WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING! WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN?
MARIE: SHUT UP! I’ll explain later.

Bouncing around with tools, food, spare parts and jerry cans, with more or less nothing to hold to, and with the sliding door open, Janne and Andreas were praying for their lives. But when their saw the pack of werewolves they nearly shit themselves, Janne grabbed the sledgehammer while Andreas took the axe, in case some werewolf should jump in through the sliding door. However, there was almost no time for thinking anything more before the van slowed down at an alarmingly fast rate after a loud crunch, causing both of them to headbutt the centre divider wall. The fact that their noses now were bleeding like crazy was nothing they even had the time to think about now.

ANDREAS: OUCH! What the… SHIT! She hit a werewolf!, he screamed as he saw one bounce up on the windshield to fall to the ground again.
JANNE: Yeah but don’t worry about that one, it is already dead, concentrate on… OH FUCK!

What they saw now was Marie being knocked dizzy by the airbag, with her foot still pinned to the accelerator, while the van was coming close to a huge rock at an alarming speed.

ANDREAS: FUCK, WE ARE GOING TO DIE!
JANNE: I CAN’T UNDERSTAND WHAT THE FUCK SHE IS DOING.

Meanwhile in the cab, Marie was regaining consciousness, with her face still planted in the empty airbag.

MARIE: OH FUCK, I CAN’T SEE SHIT, WHAT THE FUCK IS HAPPENING!

When she had put herself in a more comfortable position again, she saw the rock coming closer at about mach 2 and had to swerve, somehow managing to get her hands tangled in the remains of the airbag, causing the van to get up on two wheels, landing on all four again. Andreas managed to grab the handle on the non-working sliding door while Janne was thrown out of the open sliding door, landing on the grass. Unfortunately, the van stopped with a corner hit on another werewolf, causing only cosmetical damage this time, which also meant that the werewolf was wounded and very angry, rushing to attack Andreas inside the cargo compartment. However, Janne somehow managed (during a hefty adrenaline rush) to hit it in the neck with the sledgehammer, if it was dead or just unconscious was unclear, Andreas at least got some time to hit it with the axe so there was no doubt that it definitely was dead. Andreas rushed through the drivers door, with all the adrenaline running he somehow got some strength to push Marie to the centre position on the bench seat, while Janne jumped in through the passenger door, quickly shutting them closed and locking them. They were just quiet, staring on each other, but at least the van was fully driveable. Soon afterwards, they heard Rukari yelling that they all had to leave the camp.

ANDREAS: Well….that was a nice suggestion, how about not choosing campsites like this to start with?

The pink, and now very battered van, took first place after the Bricksley in the convoy, probably because of Andreas driving like Fittipaldi in the adrenaline rush just to get away from the werewolves. Now they could really hope for no more incidents like this in the future.

TO BE CONTINUED

3 Likes

Team Oil Crisis is the one who brought most of the guns, and their own ammunition.

Same with the few gunslingers in Team Shift Happens, with the exception of Rukari, who can use Crugandr’s ammunition types.

Commonly available ammunition in Crugandr is… Different.

All rounds are black-powder, btw, except for one.

There is .58 Short (bullet is based on a musket Minie ball, and this is made for heavy pistols, like revolvers), .58 Standard (the rifle round, think .45-70 but meaner), .58 Pointed (.58 Standard with a semi-modern pointed bullet. It can, and will, break the sound barrier with a suitable powder charge), .75 Valraad (very heavy hitting cartridge used by the Valraadi military, meant for taking out armored troops or vehicles), and .60-NK Valraad (.60 caliber smokeless (Nekan - No Smoke) with a pointed bullet, used as an anti-materiel round. Also, for smaller pistols, there is the .45 Long (a closer cousin to the .45-70, but about half the case length), and the .33 caliber (Small, close to .357 Magnum in ballistic profile, except it’s black powder.)

If you’re using a shotgun, however, you’re in luck. There are 10 gauge and 12 gauge brass-cased shot-shells.

You can also get plenty of black powder, lead bullets, and percussion caps, if you prefer.

1 Like


stream reflect or something idk...? i can't write anything today I don't even have any song lyrics to fit into this filler section. i'm not okaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay i'm not okay, i'm not okay i'm not oh-fucking-kay you wear me ouuuuuuuuuuuuuuuut but if you wanted honesty that's all you had to say That's all you had to say I never want to let you down Or have you go, it's better off this way For all the dirty looks The photographs your boyfriend took Remember when you broke your foot From jumping out the second floor?

TEAM BLAZERS


Romulo let out a sigh of relief as he scanned the red Yamada all around once the morning light had finally shone throughout the campsite. A disturbingly loud crunching of metal in the midst of the night had managed to awaken most people in the camp, and it seemed that Romulo’s hunch was right, as the large station wagon that once sat atop the hill had rolled all the way down and slammed right into the other vehicles in the campsite.

“Anything to say for yourself, detective?” Romulo glanced over at Watson, who seemed to have his eyes set on the bickering between the teams involved in the incident. “I never said that it wouldn’t succumb to a failure, only that our vehicle would be in a perfectly safe position hadst it actually happened.” Watson looked at him smugly. Romulo let out a small laugh and scoffed at him. “Bullshit!”

Whilst that was in effect, Emily and Charlotte finished up writing their notes for the next stage, and despite Charlotte claiming that the pacenotes from earlier would be difficult to do again, this time it seemed as though it were just as detailed. Eventually the two navigators had sat up from the table, and approached their drivers to brief them on the stage plan.

“Right, so this next stage is mostly gravel now, it’s going to be way more slippery than the cobblestone roads that we went through earlier, but with the tyres we have right now, I think we should be safe.” The feline flipped through the pages. “It seems as though Charlotte is quite tired today. Nevertheless, I shalt be taking over for her on this stage. She hadst briefed me on what exactly I’ll be doing, so you can place your faith in me, whoever might be driving.” The blonde smiled proudly. “Speaking of, who will be driving today? Are you feeling better today, Ray? Or will Watson be taking over again?”

“I think I should be good today.” Romulo affirmed. With their roles set in place, and the morning passed with them having ate breakfast, the only thing left for them to do was to repack their belongings back into the Yamada’s rear compartment and prepare to set off. Watson got around to waking Ga’araiya up, who was still in a comfortable slumber as she lay strewn on the warm floor of the tent. Gently, he tapped her feet, but this was just met with an annoyed grunt from her. He eventually decided to shake her awake, but this only managed to loosen the zipper on the back of her loose dress, and as she attempted to shake Watson off, her dress only got looser and looser. Noticing the precarious situation he was in, he attempted to roll her over to zip her dress back up, but it seemed as though Ga’araiya had already woken up, and noticing Watson right there next to her with her dress half-off, she delivered a swift kick to Watson’s face and ran out of the tent towards Emily.

Watson simply sighed as he began clearing the inside of the tent for anything that shouldn’t be folded up, before climbing out and confusedly meeting eyes with the rest of the crew who looked at him with begrudging looks whilst Ga’araiya clung onto Emily. “What?” He said as everyone went back to what they were doing, still occasionally glancing back at him disturbingly. Eventually, it clicked in his mind, and for the first time to everyone, Watson’s face flushed a very slight red as he attempted to clear the matter up. “Hold on a minute, it wasn’t like that!”

“Uh, huh. I thought so too until now.” Emily glared at him. “So you were going after her for a completely different reason this whole time…”

“Oh, in the name of God…”

A few awkward moments later, and the team had finally packed up their belongings and hopped into the car, with Emily in the front passenger seat, and Romulo in the pilot’s. In the back, Watson sat opposite of Ga’araiya, with Charlotte there in between them as what she called a ‘protective barrier’. And from there on out, Watson simply sat sulking.

The bell in the tower at the town of Viravalli rang out, and Romulo went full throttle out of the campsite, the unmuffled four-cylinder roaring out amidst the seventeen other vehicles in the area. The gravel trail up ahead caked in the cloud of dust as released by the other vehicles, and Romulo heavily relied on Emily’s somewhat confusing instructions. This stage was beginning to show itself as rather shaky from the very start. As per Emily’s notes, the vehicle took a slight detour off the main road to an alternative path where there wouldn’t be as much other cars blocking the path with their clouds of dust. This path was a bit slower than the other, but eventually linked up to the main pathway later. Charlotte thought that this alternative route would provide them with an advantage with their drivers behind the wheel, but right now only time would speak of their tale.

Traveling down this path proved a bit more difficult than the main path, as the road was bumpier and the tropical foliage more dense making it harder to sense the road coming ahead. Even with the notes where their timing was perfectly in sync, maneuvering the fairly sizable Yamada through here was a task that was beginning to show it’s fangs, as every small minor error was showing through, and one small error would eventually lead to the vehicle hitting a small bump wrong.

For a while, Romulo felt in sync with the vehicle’s cadence, and Emily too was riding along perfectly okay, but after a while his movements began to feel inadequate, and that driving along this path was a bit more tiresome than usual.

“Something’s wrong with the steering!” He exclaimed through the Yamada’s loud engine slowing down as he eased on his throttle inputs. Emily rolled the window down to inspect the vehicle, pulling the upper half of her body out of the window to look at the right side of the car. Romulo’s inputs seemed to match right with the steering of the front wheels. Eventually the car came to a halt to the side of the road, and now it became apparent to her that the front-right tyre was sagging more than the rear-right, and she pulled herself back in to find a Romulo whose face was tinted a slight red, and a snickering Charlotte in the backseat.

“Looks like the front tyre has lost air. Is there something wrong?” She said as she glanced at the two of them.

“N-nothing… I-I… well…” Romulo seemed unable to maintain eye contact with her, and Charlotte’s laughter couldn’t be held in much more. “Oh my god! Your bottom half was-!” The girl could barely make a distinguishable sentence through her laughter, and Emily simply stared at her confused, before putting two and two together and realizing what had just happened, and her face had flushed a very deep red.

“No way!” She covered her face in embarrasment. “S-stop lying you stupid feline! There’s no way that… m-my…”

With Charlotte’s laughter drowning out the ambient noise all around them, and the two in the front seat now feeling way too awkward with one another, it seemed Team Blazers was wasting too much time. Eventually, Watson had sat up from his sulking after he’d realized the vehicle was no longer in motion, and he looked to the rest of the team who seemed to not be doing anything.

“What the hell? What are you all doing? Why is the vehicle stopped? Aren’t we in a race?”

Everyone paused for a moment as he spoke, and they all stared at him before eventually realizing the situation they were in.

“Ah, right! The tyre’s lost air.” Romulo unbuckled his seatbelt and climbed out of the car towards the rear, and after a bit of digging through the piles of stuff in the back, he found the portable heavy-duty air compressor and quickly set things up. “P-plug this into the… h-hole… in front of the gear selector. Please.” He said to Emily as he handed over the plug, which she took and followed his instruction. The compressor fired up and with a long whirr, the tyre was now back up to pressure. Quickly, Romulo put the compressor back in its compartment and rushed to the driver’s seat, putting his seatbelt back on before continuing yet again on the journey.

The leak continued to persist, and the steering wheel only continued to heave on one side as the tyre lost pressure, but like the leak, they continued onwards at a reduced pace, rejoining the main route before the tyre once again had lost pressure and the unbalanced steering was too much for Romulo to handle. The vehicle stopped yet again off the side of the road and Romulo filled the tyre back up.

“How far are we until the next campsite?” Romulo asked as he buckled his seatbelt back in. Emily took a look at the notes and the map. “We should be close, I recon. I believe we may be less than fourty kilometres away. I’d say about half an hour at most.”

“We just reinflated that tyre about two hours ago. I guess it’ll last even if I go full speed.” He shut the door and once again they settled off, with Romulo finally giving his all into controlling the 1.2-tonne crossover with its slowly leaking tyre. He hit the throttle and sent the vehicle into first gear, a cloud of gravel rising from beneath the vehicle’s four tyres as the vehicle lept from the roadside. Romulo wrestled the vehicle straight towards the road, and Emily once again continued to dictate the pacenotes as they ventured forth. The heft on the vehicle’s right side cursed Romulo for the next hour as he wrestled the vehicle into compliance, through sharp left handers he had to wrangle the steering over and carefully balance his footwork to prevent the vehicle from understeering too much, and in right-handers he had to delicately make sure not to overcorrect by turning too far right. This special tango of driver and non-compliant vehicle continued until they finally arrived at the campsite, and to their surprise they had made it not last as they counted four vehicles.

“What an exercise that was…” Romulo sighed as he placed the vehicle to a stop. “Watson…!” He said, looking behind him. “I’ll need your assistance here.” The two left the vehicle and went towards the back, pulling out his heavy duty tyre patching kit and other tools needed to mend the vehicle. The girls meanwhile set up their tent as the boys went ahead and jacked the car up. They took the tyre off, inspecting it carefully and noticing a small gash in the all-terrain compound.

“That’s… smaller than I thought.” Romulo said as he prepared the kit. With his instructions, and Charlotte later joining in to help them, the tyre was fitted onto the vehicle almost as good as new.

“Right, that’s now out of the way. I’m beat, I’ll go for a nap I guess.” Romulo stretched his arms with a groan. “What are y’all doing?” He asked them. Charlotte looked around the campsite, the tent was already settled down and Ga’araiya was once again sleeping inside. Emily was standing nearby, with a rather thwarted look on her face, something presumably bugging her. “Not much other than the usual duties, I guess. Bathing in the river is a bit too risky, considering what happened last time.” She looked at Emily. “Guess the writer’s got nothing stirring in his mind right now.”

“Guess so, huh?”

With that rather eventful stage over, they settled off into doing what Blazers did.



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