2022 Shitbox Rally - Out of This World! (Results Out!)

Team Mravolinski-Chitco

BANG…OH NO…PLAN >:)

Prepping to go

This was good nights rest and so everyone had high hopes for the stage, packing enthusiastically into vehicle

Breakfast was mostly some fruits for three of us and some raw meat for dogs; Chicota logically joined in with few bottles of beer.
There were some comments related to fact that, apart from replacing head gaskets, there wasnt any particularly tasking work to do: Pi seems to inherit rather sound vehicle which would be rather important for journey of her own.

Courtesy of big addon, it also has lot of semi-enclosed space. Ofc its hard to be sure but its not very likely Americans would really utilise space in this kind of fashion and its indicated vehicles cargo space is indeed plentiful.
In fashion that oh-so-much indicated my European heritage, i decided all 5380 liters of indicated cargo space need to be closed off, which might be solved for itself if our team went with something like minivan, SUV or station wagon.
But ye, cargo capacity number going brrrr had quite the influence on decision
This move meant we are one of few pickup trucks and one of double cabs on grid, being one of longest vehicles and likely tallest and widest addon included…so far said size havent caused a problem…

Enjoyment was also found at first when we fully packed into car and started moving, which lasted until sky started to get darker and darker and darker…

Big vehicle was wrung around with more speed than it was legally allowed to, considering its type and small engine

At one moment, speedo showed 110 kmph or about 69 mph. Nice
Next moment tho…

CRASH

Its fair to say, i had been in cars that hit something or were hit by something.
I very much recall us hitting stray dog on highway, dad slowed down from usual 120 kmph but hit happened, very much damaging front bumper of first gen Renault Laguna estate we had at that time.
We were able to drive/walk away tho which sadly couldnt have applied to poor animal being hit.
There was also some fella that misunderstood his parking brake and his towhook hit our Dacia, resulting in light damage to hood and broken taillight: if my memory serves me correctly that was 90s Chevrolet Blazer. I could imagine seeing such vehicle in less damaging circumstances.

But nothing could have prepared properly for violent jolt caused by addon hitting some tree branches above at that 110 kmph speed mentioned in last paragraph of Camp part directly above, shaving most of initial speed.
Rest of our kinetic energy was logically shed by brakes at more appropriate rate, in order to estimate this chaos that we are now in.

This is start of some pretty serious troubles, seeing that only stuff that was technically in bed had stayed in its place.
Some clothes belonging to myself and VerBanka are now spread out on road, meaning that most of our clothing now belongs in dirty section, not that i care that much anyway about it.
Beds that used to be in space above cab are also chilling out in dirt, stuff placed between cab and that camping area was also on display and also scattered around

Clothing would for most part be shoved in cab: actually everything that size-wise could fit into cab was fitted into cab, reminding me of good old days when our 5 member family would tackle family trip with our Corsa.
That 2002 car def had its virtues mostly used by our dad for its frugal usage of fuel and zippy nature but wasnt ideal for long trips either in passenger space or avaiable trunk space.
(Some of you may say that putting LPG tank in place originally meant for spare tire didnt help. You would be right.)

Chicota had did little bit of experiment and realized that, if he focuses exhaust gasses from jet engines, he can kinda weld stuff together.

“We could repair it!”
Klimentol: “That sounds great if not for one big question…should we do that?”
Chicota: “Why not?”
Klimentol: “Hmm there is few things. Yes, it was rather nice having lot of space to put stuff and thats going to be very much missed.
However
You can see that road doesnt seem to be any more friendly to such addons and besides, Pi may encounter similar situations later on.”
“This is second-to-last stage tho, not many chances for this to repeat.”
“True, but as said, this rally isnt going to be our only worry. Pi isnt going to find someone to just weld everything back up in case of problem.
So i suggest to just pick stuff up and put it in bed; get to camp and town and hopefully we would sufficiently fasten it up and finish this journey”

This felt rather logical and after Chicota used jet engines for their original purpose aka making himself fly, he saw…everything
This forest part was indeed way too big to justify potential welding.

We are gonna continue slowly, as we are gonna pack stuff very very loosely.
What used to be gate turned into sides of our contraption was kinda evened out and now served as kinda extension for bed sides, bcos ya know, you kinda need to store much more stuff in that bed.
Former roof of camper thing would once again cover everything, but now by virtue of simply sitting on it.

Observing the car as it is now, Mrdja had idea and decided to test how loud Chicota can be.
After test, Mrdja was satisfied with results and told him tad bit more about his plan
Some evil grins were had, knowing that absolutely noone else in camp would enjoy it all that much

I ofc have feeling that Team Mrezhari is already informed about this interesting tradition, but i dont find it likely they will comment on that.

And as such we continued to camp to realize this plan of ours

PLAN >:)

We reached the camp and just continued to roll slowly through it.
Chicota opened the window on his side, took head out and spoke very loudly

WE COLLECT OLD FRIDGES, CAR BATTERIES, LAWN MOWERS, BOILERS

CLEAN YOUR BACKYARDS, SHEDS, BASEMENTS AND GARAGES OF JUNK

BATHTUBS, JUNK IRON, BROKEN ELECTRIC STOVES, WASHING MACHINES

WE HAVE BEST PRICES IN BUSINESS
EVERYTHING THAT ANNOYS YOU, EVERYTHING THAT IMPEDES YOU
WE BUY

After getting to end of camp, we simply turned car again and repeated the process, as per plan.
With our great plan being realised, it was back to serious business, mostly related to fastening all of the junk we are now carrying.
With that, dogs and Chicota had went to town to get necessary supplies and Mrdja was left to deal with everyone from other teams as result of his great idea.

No matter who decides to ask, explanation would be about the same:

In Serbia, there are some ppl that live this way.
They are mostly of Romani ancestry, but there are no particular rules in that regard
They get some cheap van or very small truck that can be driven on car license (vehicle even fully loaded must be below 3500 kg), get some megaphone to make themselves heard and do same thing that our team just did.

Ofc we dont expect influx of more junk as we kinda already have enough of our own but they do genuinely buy old stuff in decrepit and not exactly usable condition atm

Are their prices really the best?
Not informed in that regard, but i feel better price may be obtained by hauling this crap to junkyard yourself or if possible actually fixing it.

Would their vehicles be eligible as inspiration for SR entry?
Long answer would be
Judge for yourself
Search any of this on Youtube
“Staro gvozdje/gvozde/gvožđe” (Old iron)
“Stari akumulatori” (old car batteries)
“Kupujemo staro gvozdje” (we buy old iron)
“Cistimo/Čistimo podrume, dvorista/dvorišta i supe/šupe” (We clean basements, backyards and sheds(of trash))"
And see whats driven

But short answer is very much YES

Are they annoying and obnoxius for most of ppl?
Honestly yes, but we are mostly ignoring them if their services arent explicitly needed to us

But as always, if someone is up for some RP related or unrelated to this, i wouldnt mind.

3 Likes

you may get the grumpy side of my team, shouting through cam at 2-moon when (almost) everyone is asleep

nvm my team isn’t even in camp

1 Like

RK Series Racing; Stage 16 Drive

and

Team Shift Happens

(Collab with @Madrias, obviously)


It was still very much dark in the Allvenitz Steamworks, save for some dim electrical lighting dotted about the room. At precisely 4 hours before expected sunrise, Connor’s internal timer went off, kicking him out of his stand-by state, with everyone else partaking in the Shitbox Rally still asleep. The only other people awake were the local workers with the Bricksley’s soon-to-be rail wheels and Neville, who was supervising the whole thing as best he could.
Those wheels did already look mostly complete, but the four of them were stacked onto a lathe-like tool, where they were to be balanced for the expected speeds.

Connor did not wait long to execute the assigned task, choosing to get Constantin out of his sleep first.
He approaches the Dione, carefully opening the front passenger door, behind which Constantin was “sat” on a heavily reclined seat.
Connor gave Constantin some light taps to his right jaw area, which already was enough to get Constantin into a very vaguely alert state.
“Good morning. It is approximately four hours before sunrise.”, Connor calmly stated.
“Yeah cool thanks.” Constantin mumbled back, still in the process of waking up.
“I am going to get Malavera awake.” Connor replied, already heading off to the tent Malavera was in.
“You do that…”, Constantin replied, while he put the seatback up to it’s upright position.
Connor then went over to the tent as announced.

Malavera gave a quiet, half-growled groan as he slowly sat up. Sleep, for the last hour or so, had been impossible as a dropped tool in the distance had rang out quite sharply and startled him awake. He’d been laying there in hopes that he’d fall back asleep, but instead, had just heard the sounds of machining going on, the sound of a lathe removing metal to get the wheels closer to their finished form.

As Connor walked over, Malavera crawled out of the tent. “Good morning, Connor,” Malavera said, standing up to his full height and stretching a bit before reaching back into his tent and putting his shirt back on.

Connor looked at Malavera with a bit of confusion.
“Good morning. I see you are already awake.”, he said, mentally ticking off the task of getting him out of bed.

By this time, Constantin was also mentally functional and got out of the car, closing the door with a noticeable thud that didn’t seem to bother Tim at all.
He then came over to the other two, his face looking perfectly awake, but everything else as if he hadn’t slept for a week.

“Mornin. Looks like the wheels need some work still…”, Constantin spoke to the other two while trying to neaten himself up as best he could.
“Indeed they do. They currently are being balanced to make them as round as we can get them to be. They should be completed shortly.”, Neville spoke eagerly and with little consideration for the volume of his voice.

This didn’t seem to phase Valentin or Tim, though the members of Shift happens did not take this lack of awareness too kindly.

Rukari startled awake at the loud voice, then grumbled out, “Why don’t you step on my tail next time? It’d be just as unpleasant a wake-up call, but at least your foot will also be in pain.”

The loud voice seemed to also have an effect on the rest of the crew, with Kivenaal sitting up in the back of the truck with a glare before shoving the door open and climbing out, Kayden soon joining him with a rather large yawn, Kaylie grumbling as she crawled out of her tent, still looking sore from yesterday’s fall, and Jayde muttering under his breath, “It’s not worth it to cast silence, he didn’t know any better.”

As they made their way out of the car or tent one by one, Rukari made his annoyance very known, which made Neville realize what just happened

“Oh fuck… i am so sorry!”, he started, going from heightened voice to almost whispering halfway through trying to excuse himself from the bad he just did.
“Good job in pissing of an entire herd of furballs.” Constantin commented, aware that his choice of words probably was less than ideal, though in his defense he didn’t have any real info on what the members of Shift Happens actually were.
“At least that saves us the effort of getting them out of sleep. Well, most of them…”, he added, chuckling a bit while looking at Valentin tucked between some toolboxes and sleeping through all this mess as if he was at home, in bed, undisturbed by anything.

At the other end of the shop, the workers were stepping back from the workpieces, followed by some nasty coil whine as it spun up to whatever speed the lathe could muster, the four workmen watching the array of wheels for any oscillations and vibrations. A few moments later, the speed was dialed back down and they got back to work, turning the cylindrical wheels into conical ones.

Malavera smirked, then quipped back to Constantin, “I’d prefer the term ‘pack’ over ‘herd,’ though given our heavily feline-biased nature, maybe ‘pride’ is better.”

This, of course, earned him a light elbow in the ribs from Kaylie, followed by her looking through the building, seeing the balancing process going on for the wheels.

Kivenaal grabbed one of the water jugs off of the roof of the Bricksley, flipped the cap open, and took a long drink. When Kayden poked him in the side and made him spill water all over himself, Kivenaal bonked him on the head with the now-empty container.

“Really? It’s too early for this shit,” Jayde grumbled, watching as Kivenaal and Kayden had a momentary, surprisingly quiet scuffle that ended with Kayden managing to knock Kivenaal’s hat flying, only to get knocked over and kicked in the ass by a cowboy boot for his trouble.

“Settle down, children,” Kaylie quipped, looking over at the two of them.

Rukari looked over at Neville, then asked, “You say the wheels are still being worked on. When can we expect that they will be done?”

“I’d guess we’d be able to get breakfast done first,” Malavera said. “Granted, we’re almost out of easy supplies.”
“As far as i am aware, they are currently being balanced for roundness. Should be done in less than half an hour.”, Neville said, turning around to have a quick look at the workers near the lathe.
“Definitely less than half an hour. Seems like they are shaving off the excess into the conical shape that rail wheels have.”

“Well in terms of breakfast i am covered. Still have an MRE i can feast on. Though we will have to get at least Valentin out of “bed” soon, with how he takes longer than your locomotives to get going…”, Constantin commented.

“If he takes 2 hours to wake up then i would genuinely be amazed.”, Neville replied, unaware of the differing time scale on earth.

“Had a case of that once already.”, Constantin quipped back. “I’ll get breakfast for myself.”
Constantin then went back to the Dione to retrieve canned bread and some butter.

“You’ll ruin your fireboxes doing that,” Rukari mentioned to Neville. “Better to bring them up to temperature slowly when you can, otherwise you earn yourself a lot more work.”

“We’re in a steamworks,” Kivenaal said. “Maintenance is their business.”

“Hey, less talking, more making of food, please,” Kayden grumbled.

“Thank you for volunteering to cook the meal, then,” Rukari quipped back, making Kayden groan.

“Do we even have any food left in the truck?” Kaylie asked.

Malavera reached into the truck bed and grabbed what was left of the supplies they’d picked up the day before, then said, “We’ve got plenty of fruits that should be eaten soon.”

“Great. Breakfast without actual food in it,” Kayden grumbled. He then watched in shock as Kivenaal grabbed a fat orange out of the bag and bit into it like it was an apple. “Seriously? You’re supposed to peel those.” He watched in horror as Rukari did the same thing, then shook his head.

Jayde, on the other hand, just chuckled. “Good luck convincing either of them that they’re doing that wrong. That’s just how they eat citrus fruit,” Jayde said, picking out a green apple and pulling out one of his knives to cut slices out of it, eating each one off of the blade of his knife.

Malavera chuckled and opened the toolbox, pulling out his personal supplies and grabbing an MRE labeled in a language that was hard to read, even with the rings on, peeling it open and taking a bite out of the very dense brick inside it. This was followed by a lot of chewing and Malavera grabbing his canteen from inside the truck with a grimace. With his other head, he mentioned, “I do so very much hate these things. How in the name of the Moons above can one bite completely dry out your mouth? I swear, whoever invented these deliberately wanted to torture people.”

Kaylie and Kayden shared a glance before reaching for Malavera’s bag, only to stop when Malavera shook his head. “They might not be safe for the two of you, they’re made for my kind.”

“So what are we supposed to do for food?” Kayden grumbled.

Kivenaal looked over at Kayden, then replied, “You could go hunt. Or, you could do the sensible thing and head into town to buy food so we don’t have to rush to do that when we arrive at the next camp.”

Kaylie leaned over the bed rail, grabbed two decent looking apples, and handed one to Kayden. “Quit whining about eating fruit, you know you’re able to eat some of it,” Kaylie grumbled.

“Yeah, and it’s not right,” Kayden said, taking a bite out of the apple with a grimace.

Malavera shook his head again, taking a long swig of water before taking a smaller bite of the tough brick again.

“What exactly is that?” Kivenaal asked, looking at the block.

Malavera glanced at the label, then said, “Supposedly, beef, vitamins, minerals, wheat powder, and salt, cooked and formed into a block and then thorougly dehydrated, before being vacuum sealed. They’ll keep for about 5 years.”

“Five of yours, or five on Earth?” Kivenaal asked.

“Mine. About 35 years on Earth. Provided the seal stays intact and they’re stored properly, that is. Truth be told, I think they’re designed to be something you only eat because it’s better than starvation,” Malavera replied.

Breakfast was much less eventful for Constantin, who had a slice or two of buttered bread before deciding that it wasn’t exactly enough. Digging back into the box, he locates a small package of biscuits, which he happily pulls out before dumping the remaining contents and the box itself into his backpack.

“Good old Bunker Buster Biscuits. Love 'em.”, Constantin spoke while opening the plastic wrapping, followed by him happily munching on them, followed by a drink rivalling Malavera’s in volume. After all, they were known for being dry as the Sahara and somehow being a good substitute to charcoal bricks if paired with a suitable fire starter.

Other than that, breakfast was not exactly exciting, especially with half of RK Series Racing still asleep.
Eventually, a pair of workers came over, pushing a crude wooden cart of sorts with a stack of shiny flanged rail wheels on top of it.

“Got them done. Finally.”, one of the two proclaims proudly, though it is obvious that the two were exhausted.
“Yeah… that guy of yours specified really tight tolerances that turned out to be major ass-pain in some areas… Alas, here they are.”, the other spoke, before both headed off to collect the two other colleagues, soon heading out for their deserved time away from work.

With the wheels ready and “breakfast” finished, Malavera and Kivenaal slowly moved the truck into a maintenance bay to test-fit the new wheels and set the vehicle down on the rails for the first time.

While they were busy getting the truck lifted up to fit the new set of wheels, Rukari pushed the cart over to Kivenaal and Malavera, who had the front end up in the air on jack stands and had the front wheels off already, tossed into the truck bed.

There was a quiet scrape and clunk as Kivenaal lifted the first wheel up, gripping it around the rim with all four hands before placing it over the spindle, where Malavera then loosely spun on the lug nuts. They did the same for the other side, before gripping the wheels and torquing the lug nuts down appropriately. With that done, the truck was settled down onto the rails, and then the process was repeated for the rear of the vehicle.

It hadn’t taken that long, but sure enough, the truck now sat on the rails on shiny new rail wheels.

Of course, this gave everyone the first real view of the first problem they’d need to solve, as the Bricksley on the rails seemed to tower over the Dione.

The size disparity problem became obvious almost immediately to Constantin, who decided that now was the time to get Valentin out of bed. Before he could do so, however, a shunting engine that was within the steamworks had just finished the final inspection and was now ready to be sent back to work.
As such, it aggressively blared it’s whistle to announce the moving train to everyone within and around the building, after which the steam pressure within forced the cylinders into motion, propelling the engine out the door and onto the yard out front.
Amazingly, Valentin still slept through all of this commotion, not even moving an inch.

“Uhm… is he still alive? Like… how could anyone sleep through a goddamn steam train whistle going off?”, Constantin commented, which prompted Connor to check.
He walks up to Valentin, who has been sleeping on Constantin’s sleeping bag for basically the entire night, save for the first hour or so spent in the maintenance trench below the Dione.
Once there, he determines that Valentin is indeed alive and well, albeit still fast asleep or unconscious simply by closely looking at him. With basic vital signs known and normal (for a sleeping 7 footer, at least), he went a level further, eliminating unconsciousness via a pain reflex test.

Needless to say, Valentin was indeed not unconscious, as the classic pinch-test has him roll around and off of the sleeping bag, groaning.
“He was asleep.”, Connor confirmed, since Valentin did show a reaction to pain.
“Good job… now to wait until his brain actually gets going…”, Constantin replied, crossing his arms while looking at Connor and Valentin.

Kaylie startled as the whistle blared, glaring in the direction of the loud, offending, brightly-colored object that was the shunting locomotive as it departed the steamworks. Kayden, on the other hand, looked concerned about Valentin right up until the moment that Connor pinched him and got some movement out of him.

“How the fuck can he sleep through a train whistle?” Kaylie said, shaking her head.

Rukari shrugged. “Not entirely sure myself.”

At the far end of the steamworks, Malavera and Kivenaal were joined by Jayde, who helped put the last tire in the bed. “So, any problems putting this thing on the rails?” Jayde asked.

“Getting it lined up was a bitch, but it’s on there,” Malavera said.

“Shame the engine’s still broken,” Kivenaal added. “It’d be interesting to see how it’d handle the rails like this under its own power.”

Malavera looked down through the steamworks, then said, “We might have to come up with a backup plan in case Val doesn’t wake up on time. We don’t have enough time to make another set of rail wheels, and I can’t learn how to operate on the line in just a few hours, but… We have tires, there is an old steam truck out there, we could technically tow the Bricksley.”

Jayde mentioned, “Valentin’s waking up. Just very slowly.”

“Good, because while I’d like to drive a steam truck,” Kivenaal said, “I’d rather not have to figure it out while towing something else.”

“Well now we wait. He will get going… eventually…”, Constantin commented.
Thinking about it a little more, he took a quick look around, spotting a set of things that could speed up the process a bit. He went off to get them out of anyone’s view, returning with a sizeable bucket full of water.
Said bucket was blinked down near Valentin for now, spilling some of it’s contents onto the surrounding floor.
He then went over to Valentin, who conveniently was not on the sleeping bag anymore, dragging said bag clear from his vicinity.
“Mind if i borrow your phone for a second?”, Constantin asked, followed by Valentin actually handing his phone over without a second thought, not that he was awake enough to produce that second thought to begin with.

With the electronics secured and his sleeping bag safely stowed, the contents of the bucket made their way straight to Valentin, absolutely drenching his entire upper body in one go.
The once practically asleep Valentin turned into a perfectly awake, though very soggy and confused Valentin, frantically flailing around in a futile attempt to shield himself from the latter half of the bucket.
Once the waves stopped crashing down on him, he cleared his field of view from the mass of hair now stuck to his face, followed by him looking around, trying to make sense of what is going on.

“Seems like jumpstarting your brain works.”, Constantin chuckled, still holding the now-empty bucket.
“You blithering idiot! Just because you can get up on a whim doesn’t mean everyone can!”, Valentin blared after a short pause of processing, going from laying on his back to seated in the process.
“Well we don’t have half a day to wait for you to get going. We’ve got problems to solve… Like how the hell are you gonna tow the Bricksley over there?”, Constantin countered, pointing at the truck in question.
“I don’t know!, I just got the nuclear option of being woken up!”, Valentin snapped, still visibly angry at the rude awakening.
“Well that nuclear option would be the steam whistle going off about 20 minutes ago which you slept through in it’s entirety without even flinching…”, Constantin protested, not really wanting this to escalate into a fist-fight both because Valentin would lose by a landslide and because he himself hasn’t been awake for all that long either.

Kaylie groaned as Constantin dumped a bucket of water over Val, which had the expected result of being one hell of an alarm clock. “Jayde,” Kaylie called out across the steamworks, “Could you bring my good towel over here? Val’s going to need it.”

Jayde thought for a moment, trying to figure out what Kaylie meant by the “good” towel, up until he realized the real intent. He grabbed Kaylie’s bubble-gum pink towel and, making sure he was hidden from sight by a locomotive, quickly put a mild enchantment on it to wick up just a bit more water when it was used. It wouldn’t be much, but now they had a towel that would certainly help dry off Valentin. He wandered over, knowing better than to run considering the multiple hazards around, then handed Valentin the bright pink towel.

“It’s not much, but Kaylie said to bring the good towel. Should soak up most of the water without too much of a problem,” Jayde said in a calm, polite, and friendly voice, hoping to defuse the situation a little.

Kaylie, on the other hand, gave a grimace as she realized Val’s nice new suit was also soaked. “Not sure that’ll pull the water out of his suit, though,” Kaylie admitted. “It’s good at getting water out of fur, but… Not sure if it’ll pull water out of fabric.”

“Well thank you…” Valentin grumbled, still annoyed at the extreme measures taken to get him awake.
He dries off his face and most of his hair, the latter remaining somewhat moist through force of habit. The suit, however, remained soaked all the way to and including the skin beneath.
Still, something is better than nothing as he returns the towel to Kaylie, completely oblivious to the enchanted nature of it.

After that, Valentin just sat there, trying to actually get going and mentally prepare for what is to come.
That being figuring out the operational things of how Robert will move the Bricksley along the rails.

Kayden rummaged in one of his pockets and turned up three of the cycling bars, looked over at Val, and decided to hand him two of them. “It’s not really a good breakfast, but… We don’t have any decent supplies, either. I mean, I can run over to the truck and get the mixed bag of fruit if you want to pick through it, but otherwise, it’s just these. I’ll have to get my canteen from the truck anyway, so it’s not an inconvenience either way,” Kayden said.

Kaylie chuckled as Jayde tried his best to wring out as much water from the towel as he could, his canteen sitting at his hip pretty much in plain sight.

Over by the truck, Kivenaal and Malavera were still holding a discussion about the old steam truck when it was noticed that Rukari seemed to be missing.

“Where the hell do you think he is?” Kivenaal asked.

“Oh, this isn’t good. When’s the last time you saw him?” Malavera inquired.

“Breakfast, eating an orange. How about you?”

“Same. The good news is, he can’t have gone far,” Malavera said.

“So you think. He knows how to operate steam vehicles, Mal. We’re surrounded by things that run on steam.”

“Yeah, and we know he wouldn’t steal a train.”

“Shit. Ten credits says he’s fucking around with the steam truck,” Kivenaal said, getting up and heading toward that area of the steamworks. Malavera followed shortly after, and just outside the shop, they found Rukari with an oil can.

“What are you doing!?” Kivenaal asked.

“Preparing our backup plan. Just need to fill the tanks and light the boiler,” Rukari replied.

“Val’s awake, you fool,” Malavera said. “Once he figures out how to deal with the two vehicles, we’ll be okay.”

Kayden stormed over to the doors, then said, “You know, the three of you don’t have to shout. Kaylie and I can hear the three of you loud and clear over all of the background noise in the shop.”

“It’s certainly something…”, Val replied, pocketing one bar and opening the other. After taking a bite or two out of the opened one, he fumbles around to get up to standing, making the mess that is now his suit even more obvious. The front was all kinds of soggy and wet while almost everything else was in some state of dusty.

Regardless, he vaguely overheard the discussion going on about Rukari prepping the steam truck out back, promting him to head over to the Bricksley and take a look.
It indeed was substantially larger, as was already known. But with the Bricksley now being dead, another issue presented itself, it being that it couldn’t provide any motive power with a dead engine.

“Can we get Robert railed? Would be good to know the true size and clearance relations between the two. Ideally one behind or ahead of the other.” Valentin ordered, looking back at the Dione.

Constantin immediately went over to push it into position, though it became obvious that steering, pushing and aligning was a bit much to handle alone, the latter of which was covered by Valentin also heading over again to help rail it up.

“I’d appreciate some help here.” Constantin said from near the Dione, which pulled the last member out of Dreamland.
Tim moans, looking about the car’s interior a bit before greeting Constantin and Valentin.
“What happened to you?”, he inquired, unaware of the bucketload move earlier.
“Just… don’t ask…”, Valentin replied. “We need to get Robert railed, just a heads up.”
“Sure, i guess…”, Tim answered, getting out of the car to walk and stretch for a bit.

Kaylie and Jayde were the first ones to realize while the Dione was being moved, the Bricksley was right in the damn way of the easily-accessible set of rails. “Shit!” Kaylie said, taking off at a full sprint toward the truck, with Jayde unable to keep pace despite his longer stride. When Jayde finally caught up, the two of them pushed together, the Bricksley moving almost-effortlessly on the rails.

“We’ve got to go move the truck!” Kivenaal yelled, prompting Malavera to take off toward the doorway. The same doorway where Kayden was standing, aware of the need to move the truck and making a few steps in the right direction to help, only to get bowled into by 500 pounds of charging two-headed wolf-man who hadn’t anticipated Kayden taking so long to get moving. The two of them went to the floor hard, with Rukari quickly following them, tripping over Malavera’s leg, and doing a rather unelegant tumble across the shop floor.

Kivenaal walked in, looked at the three of them, and rolled his eyes. “Really? Are doorways that foreign of a concept to you three?” Kivenaal quipped, stepping around the pile-up that was Kayden and Malavera, then looking over at Rukari, who had stopped mere feet from landing in a maintenance pit covered in coal dust.

Kayden groaned and shoved Malavera off of him, getting up with a wince. “I feel like you hit me with the fucking truck, Mal,” Kayden groaned.

“I hit one of my heads on that fucking rock you call a skull,” Malavera replied with a grimace. He wiped a finger against his left lower lip and winced, seeing the red tint of blood. “That fucking hurt.”

“Oh, yeah, bit your lip when you hit me in the head?” Kayden asked, taking a look.

Malavera grimaced and gave a light nod.

“I guess we’re even, then,” Kayden said with a smirk. He ducked as Malavera took a half-hearted swing at him, chuckling as he dodged the friendly punch. “So, how did Rukari do?”

“Other than the fact that if we were playing Charades and he was attempting to mimic a scorpion quite well,” Kivenaal said, “he seems okay.”

By the time the four of them made it over to the truck, Jayde and Kaylie had already pushed it forward enough to fit the Dione behind it.

The issue of understaffing solved itself via Connor steering, Valentin directing and Constantin pushing the car about. As it made it’s way out of it’s current “parking spot”, the commotion in the doorway unfolded, garnering curious looks from all four members, all of which asking “Are you okay” in their usual variants.
Once it became obvious that both Kayden and Malavera were (mostly) fine, they returned to maneuvering the Dione about the place.

Getting closer to the bay where the Bricksley was railed up, they discovered that Jayde and Kaylie already made some space for the Dione to park up behind it.
What followed was the usual process of railing up, except that the boiler did not carry any pressure at this time.

Kayden, Malavera, Rukari, and Kivenaal joined Kaylie and Jayde at the truck, where Malavera opened up one of the doors and grabbed a clean shop towel to wipe the blood off of his lip and chin. There, they watched the process of the Dione converting from road to rail, with a bit of commentary here and there about it seeming a bit easier than railing up the Bricksley.

“Shit. Shouldn’t the truck be behind the Dione?” Kayden asked.

“Steam engines can push a train just as well as they can pull it,” Malavera replied. “The only difference here is that someone’s going to have to manually control both ends of the train, because we can’t hook the brakes together.”

“Yeah… that and the fact that i have no way in hell of seeing past the truck. Which means that we either are swapping ends and waste a ton of traction that we don’t have, someone with railroading experience tells me what’s going on… somehow… or i’m not the one actually in the driver Seat of Robert.”, Valentin added to Malavera’s explanation, mentally weighing each option against the others.

“The best logical option is to have you up front giving signals to someone behind to control the Dione. The issue is, we have a 6 seat truck and 6 people already, and only one person who could fit in the Dione,” Malavera replied.

Kaylie groaned. “Great. If that’s the case, I hope the weather stays mild.”

“Let me check something…”, Val remarked, after which he went into the Dione from the fireman’s side, pulling out a little cheat-sheet containing info on what each lever does. After reading through it, an idea comes to mind.
“Here’s the plan. The reverser lever on the fireman’s side can override the throttle setting enough to make it redundant. So whoever is in the driver seat instead of me just has to weld their foot to the floor and keep it there for as long as that person is sat there. We could modify the cable pull, but we’d lose reversing in that case. Connor can then control power from his end, allowing direct visual communication from the Bricksley back to the Dione. Back-to-front could be solved via light signals, horn or the whistle, if need be…”, Valentin explained rather confidently. The lack of any objection or protesting from Connor boosted that confidence further.

“So… Kaylie gets the driver seat, then?”, Tim inquired.
Kaylie looked over at Tim, then back to Valentin. “How hot is it, usually, in the driver’s seat? Because if it’s cooler than in the back, I might take that option,” Kaylie asked.

“Truth be told, i don’t know. To me, it’d perfectly bearable windows up, but i feel like i’ve won the gene-pool lottery in terms of heat resistance, especially since that chain out there and human hairdo don’t mix all that well. And i haven’t been in the back for extended periods of time to say much about that either… However, on my way in and out of the car during crutch-times, the temperature gradient surely was noticeable.”, Valentin answered, unsure if that was what Kaylie wanted to hear while running one hand through his voluminous hair to prove the point.

“The temperature should be anywhere between zero point four and two degrees Celsius colder in the front row. A steeper gradient is expected if any window is rolled down. Absolute temperatures range from two to six degrees above ambient, depending on vehicle state and ambient temperature.”, Connor added calmly.
Kaylie nodded. “Should be doable,” she said. “All I have to do is sit in there and pin the accelerator to the floor, then?”

Malavera chuckled, then said, “Kaylie’s just making sure she’s heard it correctly. It’s not every day someone tells you to get in the driver’s seat and floor it.”

“Get in, floor it and keep it floored until we either arrive or need to reverse, in which case Connor will tell you when to take that foot off.”, Valentin confirmed, grinning a little at the hilarity of perpetually welding one’s foot to the floor.
"With control over Robert sorted, Connor and I need some way of communicating. I guess we’ll just head off while you pack up your stuff. Can also get the two coupled if you want and have some spare time.
After that, the two went off to discuss and arrange a set of signals in both directions. Meanwhile, Constantin and Tim got to work packing up what little equipment was taken off of and out of the Dione yesterday.

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Kaylie stuck around near the truck in case she was needed, while Kayden, Jayde, Rukari, and Kivenaal gathered up and packed up the tents. Malavera, meanwhile, made sure the load was secured in the truck bed, periodically stopping to try cleaning the blood out of his snow-white fur.

With everything they needed now secured in the truck bed, the team prepared for their first proper rail adventure.

It took quite a while until a set of signals was established that covered the controls and instructions needed for Valentin to remotely operate the train from up front. By that point, Shift Happens was long done packing up supplies.

“Alright. I think Connor and i have got our communications figured out, which means that we are good to go. We are going to take seats, Connor will steam Robert and and we will take a leisurly trip to the other end of the Yard, where i shall arrange some things with the signalman. After that, we will proceed on the line as usual… well ‘usual’…”, Valentin announced to everyone present.
Following that, all members of the now-fusioned 10-person team took their places, with Malavera behind the now-useless wheel and Valentin on the other side flanking Kayden between the two. The second row had Kivenaal behind Malavera, Jayde staring at the radio array and Rukari filling up the last available seat. Back in the Dione, it was the usual affair, with Tim and Constantin in the rear left and rear right seats respectively and Constantin sat in the fireman’s seat. The only change had Kaylie in the driver seat previously vacated by Valentin.

With everyone seated and ready to go, the waiting began for Robert to raise steam, since Connor was about the last person to enter either car.

Kaylie looked over at Connor’s side of the dashboard, watching the various gauges climb slowly yet steadily as the boiler behind them whooshed like a blowtorch under a tea kettle, unable to hide a grin as she had, as instructed, pinned the gas pedal all the way down. She had the window rolled down a couple of inches to get some airflow into the car, her left arm resting on the door panel with her thumb hooked in the equally-unnecessary steering wheel rim, her right hand resting loosely on the wheel at the 5-o-clock position.

Up front, things were a little less calm as everyone waited for Robert to steam up. With all the windows down, they could hear the boiler far behind them warming up, the sounds of other locomotives nearby shuffling around, the rattles and clanks of steamworks toolboxes being picked through for tools to work on the other engines nearby.

Jayde stared at the radio panel, rendered useless through both insufficient power and courtesy of whatever horrible screeching squeal had blown their speakers out on the way through camp, and tried to imagine what the locals would think of this unusual mess.

Rukari gripped the front edge of the bench hard, a little nervous as he wasn’t sure how well things would go with being pushed, engineless, down the rails.

Kivenaal was in an almost-meditative state, not quite awake and not exactly sleeping as he sat there, waiting for the convoy to start.

Kayden looked out of the windshield, trying to play “spot the signal” already despite the vehicles still being inside.

Malavera held onto the steering wheel, his foot resting near the brake pedal, having already made sure the transfer case and transmission were out of gear and that the front wheel drive portion of the 4x4 unit was disconnected. A last quick check ensured that both differential locks were disengaged. His sharp eyes were also scanning the horizon, hoping to help Valentin out with signals as needed.

Not much was happening in the “engine” of the newly formed train as Connor simply went about the procedure of raising steam pressure. Up front, Valentin was not sure, so he decided to simply ‘ask’. His right arm thus went out of the window and upwards at the elbow, his palm facing the centerline of the car, showing his intent on transmitting a speed-related command. The reply was expected to be two short blips of the electrical horn, which took a while to be returned as pressure was not yet in operating ranges. Eventually, the reply came as Connor reached over into Kaylie’s half to tap the horn a couple of times.
The signal for intent turned into a 10kph forward movement signal as Valentin turned his palm to face the train’s front while extending just his index finger. Not long after, Connor once again reached over, this time for the ignition barrel to sound the steam while for two long notes, followed by him setting the train into motion.
As soon as they started rolling, Valentin went back to showing ‘expect signal’, followed shortly after by just his fist being up there, indicating a request to stop with service brakes. Lo and behold, the train came to a halt all of 15 feet out of the door, juuuust shy of a disc shunting signal.

“Right, now we all know that the stopping distances have increased,” Malavera said. “Next time, call out that you’re using the brakes and I’ll help out.”

Kayden stared at the disc-shaped signal and shook his head. “I didn’t even know that was a signal.”

“Yard signal,” both Malavera and Jayde said almost simultaneously.

The movement had been just enough to jolt Kivenaal out of his mental hibernation, where he took in that they’d moved, but not very far.

Behind them, in the Dione, Kaylie admitted, “It feels really weird to be holding down the gas pedal and to have the car going nowhere.”

“Noted. Most of the work will probably happen from the back though to avoid excessive loads as the bar runs into either end because of the slack in there.”, Valentin replied. At least it would be useful in case of an emergency stop or if more braking power was needed otherwise.

In the powered railcar that was Robert, Connor tried to explain why they took this solution:
“I understand. If you were to let off now, we would apply full power in reverse. I can offset the your throttle input with this lever here and thereby dictate actual power levels without you having to do anything. Just inform me if you have to take it off the gas for any reason.”

“Okay, that’s definitely noted. Don’t take my foot off of the gas pedal or things go badly,” Kaylie said.

Up front, Kayden nodded as Valentin informed everyone that he had to mention the change of plans to the people in charge of the railway, before Val hopped out of the truck to inform everyone in the Dione.

Kaylie understood that they’d parked up without refueling the night before, which meant extra time getting ready, as well as getting the schedule changed for their two-vehicle consist. She sat there patiently as Valentin walked over to a signalbox, trying to figure out what was going on up ahead of them.

Jayde took the opportunity, with Val out of the car, to give Rukari a rather hard elbow to the chest. “Quit digging your elbow into my ribs, Rukari,” Jayde grumbled out, ignoring Rukari’s wince.

Valentin was gone for the better part of ten minutes before returning to the train, first relaying the relevant info to Connor:
“Okay. Signalling staff has been informed about the second carriage and lower expected speeds. We should be able to keep up with longitude trains when accounting for them stopping, but we will need to make way if they do catch up. But now, refueling.”
“Understood.”, Connor replied.
Valentin then headed up front, climbing back into the cab, effectively repeating what he told Connor and the others before. Soon after, the train began to move backwards across the yard once more, before stopping almost immediately after.
Valentin then adjusted the mirror on his side before looking at the other one, realizing that he couldn’t see anything through the polished bumper trim “mirror”.
“I cannot see anything…”, Valentin mumbled while moving around, trying to get a good view of whatever trackside signage and signals may be there.

“One moment, we might be able to improve that,” Malavera said, hearing Valentin’s mumble of being unable to see. He peeled the tape off of the mirror housing, put the bumper cover under his seat for the moment, then dismounted the rear view mirror from the cab of the truck. After looking around for the tape, Malavera carefully attached the rear view mirror to the old mirror housing, then helped Valentin aim it until he could see the best that the mirror would let them.

Once the visibility had been improved slightly, which also included Kivenaal putting Rukari in a mild head-lock to give Val the opportunity to look out of the rear window if needed from under the radio console, the two vehicle consist started rolling backwards into an obvious refueling area, as they passed by a water tower, coal storage, and finally stopped near an area labeled with both “Light” and “Heavy” fuel oil.

The impromptu mirror modification ended up by no means idea, but still infinitely better than the previous version, now that he could see at least something through that one.
“Well thank you, i guess…”, Valentin said, before commanding the reversing to continue.

Once in the refueling bay, not much of note happened up front, as Valentin was not directly part of the established refueling process, courtesy of the difficulties in getting in and out of the car across the fireman’s seat or the rear bench.

In the back half, nothing unusual was happening either, with the refueling process happing like any other previous one, except for some added curiosity about how Robert was now pushing an oversized truck along.
Eventually, they are ready to roll again and make another trip across the yard to the starter signal entering the longitude mainline, where they were scheduled to wait until the next longitude train passed.

“Now we wait for the next train to blow our doors off, plus three miles.”, Valentin commented half-jokingly.

Eventually, that train made itself heard simply by virtue of the sheer noise the blastpipes made every time steam was sent out through the chimney. The train cane and went, barreling past the two teams, disappearing into the distance.

“There we go! Should get a clear way any minute now.”, Valentin said, watching the massive semaphore signal, which eventually raised it’s arm, allowing Robert to enter the line.
A command was sent backwards asking for the highest speed the previously established signal code could handle, that being 150kph, limited by the 4 bit binary nature of it.
Still, Connor gave Robert a run for it’s money in trying to get up to speed, though 150kph turned out to be quite a bit beyond what the new consist was capable of, instead levelling off a wee bit above 130kph. Even Valentin was suspicious about the perceived speed:
“This is it? This can’t be 150kph…”, he mumbled, now calling for progressively lower speeds until he could feel it decelerating.
“Huh… looks like our new top speed is somewhere around 130kph…”, he spoke again, half aloud. “Beats doing the same on shitty, unpaved roads…”

Malavera looked down at the speedometer and saw it holding around 70 to 75 MPH, then said, “Looks like the new wheels have our speedometer reading a bit low, then. Still, this is much better than another back-breaking ride on dirt roads.”

In back, Kaylie called out the tachometer numbers as Valentin asked for speed changes, with Connor then making adjustments until, eventually, they settled in at what Connor said was 130 kilometers per hour. “I see. So we’re doing about 80 miles per hour,” Kaylie responded, doing the mental math herself, using her fingers in a somewhat similar pattern to Valentin’s codes out the window to store numbers in binary.

Up front, things settled into a realm of peaceful semi-chaos, as with such smooth “road” conditions, the three in the rear bench decided to try to relax, with Jayde watching the countryside rush by, while Rukari dug out a handful of dice, split them into two equal handfuls, grabbed two red plastic cups, and started a little game with Kivenaal where the winner was whoever had the higher number. Malavera kept a keen set of eyes watching for signals, as did Kayden.

“Signal ahead is clear,” Malavera mentioned.

Moments later, Kayden grumbled out, “Yeah, now I see it.”

“Wait is i… oh yeah it is! That draft is getting really annoying!”, Valentin comments while trying hard to not be blinded by his wildly flapping hair.
“Well thank yoPFFFRT!! Pffft… anyone’s got some hair ties or something?”, he exclaimed again when one particularly nasty strand finaggled it’s way into his mouth as he spoke.
“I usually don’t have to deal with winds that strong…”

Rukari fished around in his pocket, then leaned forward and held out a handful of rubber bands for Val. Kayden looked over, then said, “Val, please take those and save all of us from the misery Rukari’s inflicted on all of us with those miserable pieces of stretchy rubber.”

Malavera chuckled and Kayden snapped, “Laugh it up, snowball. You’re not the one he’s snapped on the back of the ear. Three times.”

“That’s why I’m laughing,” Malavera admitted. “He does that to you because he knows you won’t get him back.”

Valentin took a quick, though confused look at the rubber bands, taking all of them and moving them to the dashboard for the time being. After that, they went into his hair, one by one, eventually turning the unwieldy mess into a somewhat contained, segmented ponytail, which was much more resistant to the draft coming in through the rolled-down window next to him.
“That should do, for now at least. Not exactly comfortable, nor pretty, i guess. But it works.”, Valentin commented as he went back to focusing on his duties as the train controller.

On the other end, things were settling down as well, with none of the three really saying anything, instead watching the landscape go by in case of the two humans in the second row and Connor handling the boiler controls and watching for hand signals from up front.

The remainder of the stage went surprisingly smoothly, eventually arriving a a small depot near Temmingarda.
“That’s about as close as we are gonna get. I’ll head back and have Robert de-steamed.” Valentin said, hopping out and doing as announced, followed shortly thereafter by the well-known snake-hissing that is the boiler pressure release valve.

After the engine was declared safe, the remaining members of RK Series Racing got to work collecting their supplies from the roof of the Dione, leaving everything non-essential behind to save on weight.
As they arrived in the railway depot near Temmingarda, and Connor let Kaylie know she could release the gas pedal, she lifted her foot with a slight squeak as the pedal returned to the top. She left the car after the others had, rejoining the “lead half” of Shift Happens and helping in grabbing up tents and cooking supplies.

Then it was just the long walk into camp, the ten of them all just wanting to get some rest after a long voyage.

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RK Seires Racing; Stage 16 Camp

and

Team Shift Happens

(@Madrias )


OOC: flags and italics in dialogue indicate spoken languages that are not English.


After arriving in Temmingarda, not much was left of the afternoon. Coupled with the team getting up way earlier than usual, the four members (especially Valentin) just wanted to get to camp, set up base and go to sleep. As such, they took what was deemed critical, such as tents, some small containers for fluids and cooking equipment off of the Dione, where it was distributed amongst the crew members.
A little detour was made into town to get some supplies, most of which were food and drink for the evening and following breakfast. Once at camp, Constantin was busy setting up tents, partially using whatever sticks and branches he could find while Tim got to work cooking with some help from the visibly sleep-deprived Valentin.
After dinner was had, cooking equipment and whatever clothing people rid themselves of for sleep was packed up and stored on the foot end of Valentin’s tent, which was now to be shared with Tim for lack of a third, separate tent for him to sleep in.
Despite it being a really tight fit, everyone found a reasonably comfortable position to sleep in for the time being…

After unloading their camping supplies from the truck and following RK Series Racing into camp, the members of Shift Happens ended up doing much the same, setting up their tents, getting a cooking fire going, and sending a few members into town to pick up supplies for dinner and breakfast.

With dinner done, dishes cleaned up, and everyone exhausted from the late night yesterday and the early start today, the team collectively crawled into their tents and settled in for the night…

With both teams very much asleep, all was going well until just after 2 moon, when Chicota of Team Mravolinski-Chitco decided that it would be a good idea to roll about camp, shouting something about buying up old junk like washing machines, ovens and the like.

The first trip across camp has Valentin and Constantin awake.
:sweden: Just let me sleep…”, Valentin mumbled, rolling over to the other side.
Constantin by that point was already wide-awake, his rather light sleep not helping.

The second lap of driving and shouting broke them, however, as both Valentin and Constantin scrambled their way out of their tents wearing little more than whatever set of pants they had during the day, furious about the utter lack of respect for other people and their nighttime rest.
As Valentin made his way out, Tim was also awoken by the noise of Valentin crawling out.
“Hey? What’s wrong now!?”, Tim inquired, not really getting a useful answer.
:sweden: Who is that blithering idiot who’s shouting across the camp like an absolute knobhead!?”, Valentin blared, looking around and eventually spotting Chicota rolling around camp, head out the window and repeating the same lines over and over again.
Constantin did about the same, for now managing to stay quiet.

As the beat-to-hell Kontir Cunningham rolled through camp with an idiot shouting out of the window, Kaylie groaned and rolled over in the tent. “Why do people have to be dicks at night?” she mumbled.

Kayden, likewise, was woken up by the shouting and yelling, though remembered his training to never act out of pure anger, restraining himself from grabbing his sword and preparing to make a convertible out of the truck.

Kivenaal snapped awake, then grumbled out, “So much for any more sleep tonight.”

Malavera retained enough presence of mind to not growl in camp, but instead stormed out of his tent shirtless, heading straight for the Kontir before anyone could possibly try to stop him, managing to give the Kontir a matching bed corner to the Bricksley with one well-placed kick.

Rukari was a little more restrained in his anger, walking out of the tent at a more measured pace with his claws unsheathed, waiting until the truck came back around and letting them drive past and earn a set of nearly-parallel pinstripes.

Jayde, on the other hand, woke up and looked through his bag at about the same time that Kaylie crawled out of the tent. He gave an almost-evil smirk, then grumbled out, “If it’s junk he wants, I’ll give him some.”

Kaylie started making her way back toward where the Bricksley had been parked, a smirk on her face because she had a plan.

By now, Tim also made his way out, more confused than angry, expecting another case of the massive wolf-creatures in camp, instead discovering both Scrants stood practically next to each other while staring at the Kontir Chicota was sat in.

:sweden: They want their junk? They’re getting it.”, Valentin grumbled, while powerwalking towards the yard where their impromptu train was parked just to be stopped by Constantin.
:sweden: No need to smash in their faces over some sleep now.”, he said, trying to calm Valentin down.
:sweden: YOU were the one who thought dumping a bucket full of water over someone half-asleep was a good idea! This is the THIRD… or fourth… time we’ve been robbed of our sleep! Just let me go so i can rid our car of that dead engine we’ve been hauling around for ten days!”, Valentin blared back.
Constantin somewhat relented by letting him go, but not without a half-serious shove to get him out of sight just that bit more quickly.
“What the hell is going on?”, Tim asked, absolutely confused by the whole situation.
“Those retards over there thought it was a good idea to try and buy up trash from other teams at… a bit past two moon.”, Constantin replied, checking his gifted watch for the time.
“And what is Val up to now?”, Tim added, looking at the feeble, shirtless Valentin stomping away from camp.
“Off to get some junk to gift to them…”, Constantin commented.
“Sounds like a perfect Karma moment.”, Tim said, somewhat grinning at the thought of redemption, heading off and trying to catch up with Valentin’s looong and speedy strides.

Kaylie looked over her shoulder to see Valentin and Tim making great progress in catching up to her, just before her ear twitched at a sudden loud sound from over by the truck.

Jayde stormed out of the tent in his shorts, his scarred-to-hell upper body visible to everyone as he carried his heavy, magically-expanded bag over to the truck. He flipped the flap open and turned it upside down, pouring out a seemingly-impossibly-large amount of gravel straight into the truck bed, mixed with broken glass and other debris. As the rain of crap stopped, Jayde flipped the bag upright, the flap closing as he slung it loosely over his shoulder. He then saw Malavera gearing up for another kick and waited until he’d committed, just barely, to whack him in the back of his other knee with his walking staff, causing Malavera to fall on his ass. “Get up and quit trying to beat up the truck. They want garbage, so find some and give it to them.”

Malavera bared his teeth at Jayde for a moment, before he got up, grabbed one of the camp area garbage cans, and dumped it into the bed.

By that time, Kaylie had gotten to the Bricksley and rummaged through the bed, grabbing up their dead-as-hell old car battery, then grabbed a tire that looked far beyond saving and rolled it out of the bed as well. She grabbed the top of the tire with her left hand, hearing the crunch of the radial belts in the tire under the pressure of her hand, picked up the battery with her right hand, and walked back to camp, giving Val and Tim a playful grin on the way.

Valentin noted Kaylie’s presence at the truck but didn’t do much with that info, being too concentrated on his current self-set goal. Eventually, Kaylie passes Val as oncoming traffic with him making room, but not otherwise reacting to her grin. Tim, however, seemed to be somewhat excited at the technically-requested-but-still-mischievous act of ridding either car of some weight.

Once Valentin was at the car, he dug around the roof rack, looking for the parts that came off the Dione’s engine when it was converted to steam. Shortly thereafter, he was joined by Tim doing the same, though largely independent of each other. Valentin got a hold of both manifolds, the carb and some loose waiting hanging off of said carb while Tim ended up with most of the ignition system and the remaining exhaust.

Meanwhile, Constantin went over to the Bricksley, approaching Malavera, Jayde and Mrdja at the offending truck.
“You are aware that it’s already been dark for FOUR HOURS? People are trying to sleep here! You or whatever colleague of yours managed to get at least ten people awake with that absolutely retarded dick-move of yours…”, Constantin started, keeping going for a good five minutes or so, shouting like a cliché US Army Drill Instructor that just spotted a recruit making wearing his shirt inside out.

Kaylie grinned savagely as she returned to the camp, plopping the dead battery and the destroyed truck tire both into the truck bed. “There you go!” she said cheerfully. “It’ll be good to not have to carry both of those around with us tomorrow.”

Jayde smirked, heading back toward the tents after making sure Malavera wasn’t likely to do anything else to the offending team. Malavera limped after Jayde, managing to trip him on the way back to his tent. “Now we’re even,” Malavera quipped as Jayde got up with a groan.

With the chaos over, Kaylie, Malavera, and Jayde returned to bed. Kivenaal’s only response was to pull up a chair to take on another night of watch duty, though decided while Mrdja was looking his way, to hold up four middle fingers in response for the noise.

Constantin was already back to his lean-on “tent” by the time the other two arrived at the Junkyard business truck.
Both of them simply dropped the respective parts in front of Mrdja, revealing a now somewhat greasy pair of arms an chest for Val and discolored hands for Tim due to some rust flaking off and onto him.
“There. You wanted junk, you have junk. Not our problem anymore.”, Valentin grumbled as he tried to clean himself off a a bit, instead spreading the stains out. “:sweden: Really? Need a shower…”, he mumbled as he turned around to head back to his tent. Tim simply chucked his load of components onto the pile created by Valentin, not saying anything and immediately heading back as well.

They climbed back into their tents, one after the other in case of Tim and Valentin and tried their hardest to get back to sleep. An easy feat for Tim and especially Constantin, but a treacherous task for Valentin, being awake for a good two additional hours before finally dozing off.


@MrdjaNikolen pinging you to notify you that your truck and it’s surroundings have some more junk to deal with.

3 Likes

TEAM HILLBILLY ROLLERS

Earlier parts

PART 0.1 - A prologue to the prologue
PART 0.2 - Another piece of the prologue puzzle
PART 0.3 - Viva la IP 4Z!
PART 0.4 - Robotman
PART 0.5 - Interference problems
PART 0.6 - Can I play Tetris?
PART 0.7 - Tangerine and familiar
PART 1.0 - Now things got serious!
PART 1.1 - Hello, Thibault and friends!
PART 1.2 - Poor kitty
PART 1.3 - Curse you, Team Oil Crisis!
PART 1.4 - Interlude
PART 2.0 - Bird bird bird, bird is the word!
PART 2.1 - D. Head
PART 2.2 - Good night!
PART 3.0 - Freeway Rockstar
PART 3.1 - DISCO TJO DISCO HEJ
PART 3.2 - Van-Werewolf 1-0
PART 4.0 - Calm after the storm
PART 5.0 - Mirror mirror on the…oh, crap!
PART 5.1 - Hello, little puppies!
PART 6.0 - Speed
PART 6.1 - GIMME OXYGEN! (feat. Madrias)
PART 6.2 - Steamin’ hot! (feat. Elizipeazie)
PART 7.0 - The Kayak
PART 7.1 - Marie the valkyrie?
PART 7.2 - Vegetables
PART 7.3 - Time to tie things up.
PART 8.0 - The hangover
PART 8.1 - The new team member
PART 9.0 - From pink to brown
PART 9.1 - Co-op with Madrias and Elizipeazie
PART 9.2 - Where is Sonic?
PART 10.0 - First at last!
PART 10.1 - Co-op with Variationofvariables
PART 11.0 - Why is this van so damn fast?
PART 11.1 - Co-op with Madrias
PART 11.2 - Demons and dragons bullshit
PART 11.3 - Oops, thank you, Kaylie!
PART 12.0 - Snap, crackle and pop!
PART 12.1 - The fire breathing jalopy
PART 12.2 - Written by Madrias
PART 12.3 - Bumpin’ the bumper
PART 13.0 - A jawdroppin’ ride
PART 13.1 - The monsters under the bed were real, after all!
PART 14.0 - Interlude II
PART 15.0 - Marie died once
PART 16.0 - The horrible sound

PART 17.0 - General Pink

After calming down Marie and restoring the remains of the teleporter device, the team went peacefully to sleep, well, after Marie had complained about the lack of beer about a gazillion times, there is. And once again, the team took away in the morning for yet another stint in the SR 2022 challenge.

The soundtrack should prove itself to be true sooner than the team even expected. This was a dark stage, and Andreas was driving with the LED lightbars lit up, but when he was approaching Team Black rabbit, he had to dip down to low beams to not blind them in the mirror. Soon, he was also passing the Dauer.

“They think that is some kind of rally car, but they only have 2wd, we have four, this is closer to a WRC car”, Andreas chuckled, until he saw something…the flashing hazard blinkers on the Kontir, and a mess of stuff and debris on the road.

“What kind of troubles do they h…”, he said, followed by a “HOLY SHIT, IS THAT THEIR SPARE WHEEL?”.

Without being able to take his foot off the pedal in time, the pink brick jumped over the spare wheel from the Kontir while driving blazingly fast. It did a high jump through the woods that would have made the Dukes themselves jealous, and to make things even better, or worse, Sonic landed on the button to the dixie horn, making everything look a lot like a scene from Dukes of Hazzard, though with the orange Charger replaced by something more…pink, and…boxy.

The van landed in a cloud of dust.

“They are going to pay for this”, Andreas said.
“Relax, we landed on all four”, Janne said. “And on the road. Just keep driving.”

Soon, however, they realized that the van had not taken the abuse lightly, rather, it was bouncing around like a drunken frog on the road.

“My boobs are slapping my chin”, Marie complained.

“GREAT! Now the shocks are all shot! Am I supposed to drive like this for the rest of the race?”, Andreas mumbled. “Fucking spare wheel terrorists!”

“Actually, they are a surprisingly close fit from a Volvo PV544”, Janne said. “Both the bushings and the length are the sam…”

“YEAH AND WHO THE FUCK HAS A PV BEHIND THEIR BARN HERE IN SOMEWHERE OVER THE RAINBOW OR WHAT THE FUCK THIS FUCKING HARRY POTTER COUNTRY IS CALLED”, Andreas yelled. “Those idiots are going to eat their damn spare wheel for breakfast tomorrow!”

After having a really bouncy ride into camp, the team got out of the van, about as green in their faces as the van was pink.

“How the fuck are we supposed to fix this?”, Andreas yelled.

“There is always a way”, Janne said.

“Yeah! Right? By magic or what? You are only getting more and more weird for every day! Now let me cast a spell on them!”, he continued yelling. He took a stick from the ground and was swinging it towards the van. “SAABDOMKRAFT, SEXPUNKTSBÄLTE, JAG VILL BLI EN TOFFELHJÄLTE!”, he shouted so the whole camp could hear it. Then he jumped on the new, fashionable wooden front bumper, jumping up and down.

“Look, I fixed the shocks with your goddamned Demons and dragons bullshit”, Andreas said while the van was bumping up and down like crazy.

“I will figure out a way”, Janne said.

Later, he raided the back of the van for some stuff. He took some panties he found there, and waved around with them. “Marie, I am going to take those.”

“HEY! IT IS THE LAST CLEAN ONES I HAVE!”, she yelled.

“YEAH BUT NOT LIKE YOU WERE GOING TO CHANGE THEM IN TWO WEEKS ANYWAY, YOU FAT WRECK!” he yelled back. In some weird way, he restuffed the shocks with grease and those old pieces of cloth, and in some even weirder way, it somehow worked after he had wrapped the shocks with lots and…eh, lots…of duct tape.

“You can’t drive like if you’re Ari Vatanen now”, Janne told Andreas, “but we will be able to finish the rally anyway”, he said, as the night was coming closer.

Though, a while later in the tent, the now VERY tired team was hearing the Kontir rolling in, making a tremendous amount of noise. The team went out of the tent and saw RK Series racing and Shift happens having some argument with Team Mravolinski-chitco. When they had left, Andreas went into the back of the van, stacked ALL of the remaining rolls of duct tape, spare for one, on each other, and carried them to Mrdja.

“HERE IS A GIFT FROM US SO YOU CAN TAPE YOUR PIECE OF SHIT CAMPER TOGETHER!”, Andreas was yelling at him while giving him the duct tape stack. “Now, another question, CAN YOU PLEASE KEEP TRACK OF YOUR GODDAMNED SPARE WHEEL IN THE FUTURE?”, he said, kicking one of the tyres of the Kontir very hard, before walking back to the tent.

“Goddamned idiots ruining my day”, he mumbled.

“Oh, you are so cute when you are angry”, Janne laughed at him, which he didn’t seem to appreciate at all.

TO BE CONTINUED

@MrdjaNikolen @Tzuyu_main

4 Likes

Team Mravolinski-Chitco

Aftermath of junk-collecting

Dealing with other teams

This had quickly proven out to not be as great idea as it seemed at first.
Ofc it was expected that ppl wouldnt be pleased about such disturbance, but level of displeasure was very much higher than expected.

Most terrifying reaction was ofc belonging to Malavera, to surprize of noone who may have been introduced to reaction of Shit Happens and RK Series Racing
Sight of rather big and strong fella running towards you is definitely shit-inducing: happily damage was introduced to truck and not to member of group. Seeing the dent and how much truck got pushed by this force, it was clear that it was quite strong kick, able to level down most of our team.

Oh, not to mention VerBanka was still in cab and was visibly disturbed and scared bcos of force applied.

Other individual worth mentioning was applying anger in manner that was atleast rather familiar to Mrdja.
Mrdja’s dad is rather composed individual, not allowing his anger to consume him. Most he might do these days is…exactly what Constantin did, actually.

There was ofc small moment in between that was rather funny: predictably Jayde tripping Malavera.
Two-headed guy wasnt amused, but he did proven to be rather good at throwing stuff in exact places.

We already mentioned Jayde and now that he is observed shirtless, its even more clear he went through lot of stuff.
What isnt clear and likely will never be is:
“Why he would carry so much gravel in his bag, mixed with broken glass and other impurities?”
This isnt to be answered, but it was clear bag likely contained much much more, even tho didnt seem even now-contents of bed would realistically fit in bag.

Others took this desire for thrash literally.
Well, apart from Andreas, but we will get to that in timely manner.
Tire was added to collection for very obvious reasons, while battery was requiring some check-up to confirm its dead (it is)
Kaylie’s cheerful nature was in stark contrast to everyone before and after her.

Valentin was (un)surprizingly awake, all things considered, but neither were in good mood for reason.
That was especially evident on tall guy, while American chose to express his dissapproval through facial expressions.
Their trash was rather puzzling at first, except for fact that Tim likely brought exhaust and Val prob got some carbs.

Now onto small surprize.
For reasons, it was assumed that Hillbilly Rollers might also be angry at this rude wake-up call.
Andreas was however disspleased for another reason…and carrying something that in no way would be junk.

His displeasure became no surprize when he decided to speak, tho.

Mrdja got busy putting stuff in bed and was waiting for stronger half of team to return back.

Lights out, but why arent you sleeping?

One of Madrias’s characters will be participating in one part of this- feel free to guess who. He gave go ahead.
With OOC stuff out of way…

As for our stronger trio, it becomes fairly clear that fatigue started showing in living-being part of equation.
Klimentol was hit the hardest, swaying fair bit now bcos unlike Aydar, he truly can be described as normal dog (well, as normal as he could be all things considered).
Aydar was faring up noticeably better, and robot Chicota didnt really had need to rest

“You will drive next day.”
“Ok.”
“I desperately need a bed.”
“Why not grab some coffee on the way? All three of us are pretty busy when it comes to carrying supplies.”
“Literally everyone normal is going to be asleep.”

This was hard push, but they made it.
They werent all too happy with damage to truck, but were amused at fact some ppl did took their plan literally
Mrdja explained what happened while they were out of camp.
Then almost everyone went to sleep, however they can.

It was on Chicota to potentially make adjustments for next day and also drive during that stage.
Adjustments being using what they bought+duct tape to somewhat fasten the cargo
He inspected batch of Jayde’s trash and removed dangerous stuff from it: gravel was left alone, but broken glass, pieces of metal and other stuff that can potentially hurt the rest had found themselves in generously provided garbage can.


Chicota had noticed something and decided to investigate.

“Why arent you sleeping?” was question directed at four-armed individual before him.

“Why would you ask? You have some other genius plan to awake entire camp?
Bcos if you do…im having none of it.”

“That was Mrdja’s idea, i just helped in realization.” Chicota honestly responded.

(Kivenaal holds up all middle fingers, already recognising that Chicota was one contributor)“My honest response to that information.
And no, i honestly couldnt bring myself back to sleep after your escapade, so i decided to watch the camp.”

“Fair enough. Oh btw…only me and Mrdja were being involved in plan.”

“Good to know. Dont let it happen again, otherwise my response is going to be more than gesture.
Cant guarantee for rest, but they arent going to be amused either.”

“Will keep that in mind next time.”
With that, Chicota returned to Kontir, leaving Kivenaal to do his thing.

3 Likes

Spy Kids: Before Stage 16


Who would’ve thought that rallying a bunch of clapped out cars across an alien continent could be so interesting? Who would’ve thought that alien wolves would attack an entire convoy of vehicles in the middle of the night? Who would’ve thought that a nondescript orange sedan could be turned into a steam train? Well, the Spy Kids pondered all that and more as they prepared to start the 16th and penultimate stage of their tour. No one knew who was winning; the stages were so long, and the organisers so busy with technological shenanigans, that no one kept a running total. The crew in the Yamada SUV was one of the faster teams before their car went haywire and forced them to pull out. The team figured they’d done pretty well so far as they’d just come off their second stage victory, but then there was also the time they’d been forced to shoot a Dyre (the alien wolf) and send holes through their radiator as collateral, and the time they missed their turn onto a bridge forcing them through an exceptionally muddy track. Lazar really didn’t like that last one, as he’d also dropped a jerry can onto his foot on that stage.

“I have not felt such pain since the time an illegal coal mine collapsed on me.” Lazar claimed.
“How can a coal mine be illegal?” Jessica asked.
“No permits, no safety measures, just scaffolding and dirt tunnels. A piece of scaffolding broke my hip when the mine went down. I had to dig myself out with a shovel.”

The team continued telling stories and figuring out who were the rally leaders, the thrum of a muffled diesel generator and the more pleasant sounds of music from Shay’s sound system playing in the background. As they finished breakfast, they concluded that figuring out who was winning was impossible, and thus started packing the car for the upcoming stage.

1 Like

Shitbox Rally

Stage 17: Temmingarda to Tapari

Stage Start: 1 Sun, 35/7/3251, Temmingarda Campsite

Weather at Stage Start: Hot (34C), a cloudless, almost-dry, windless day means the sun is searing hot.
Weather at mid-stage: Hot (40C), still no clouds in sight, no humidity, and still no wind.
Weather at Stage End (First Car): Hot (40C), light wispy clouds that offer no respite from the sun, still dry, and barely any wind.
Weather at Stage End (Last Car): Hot (32C), clouds appear on the horizon at sunset, mild humidity, the ocean breeze returns with a vengeance.

Stage End (First Car): 5-and-16 Sun, 35/7/3251, Tapari Campsite / City Center

Stage End (Last Car): 10-and-17 Sun, 35/7/3251, Tapari Campsite / City Center

The day starts out with stifling, searing dry heat from the beginning, turning the campsite into an oven within minutes of the sunrise. For those who still have air conditioning that works, the first order of the day is to make sure the cars have a chance to cool down. Then it’s a long journey on a decent gravel road leaving Temmingarda, returning to the Temmingarda Forest. It doesn’t take long, however, for the road to leave the forest once more, opening up to a brilliant hillside view of the ocean. The road alternates between hard packed gravel that nearly resembles a modern road and loose gravel more resembling a rally stage, clear signs that while there is maintenance done on this road, it’s clearly more of a “make sure no one finds a sink-hole and flips their carriage” situation and less of an “improve the road for comfort” situation. The slow, gradual downhill on a gently winding road would be quite fun if the road were properly paved, or if someone had brought a rally car. After a long, long drive out in the open, however, the walls of the City of Tapari come into view, and the road leads right through the gate. The city guards open the way and we’re allowed to park up in the city for the night.

The city’s architecture ends up being a little unusual, with some buildings nearer to the entrance being made with stone, but transitioning toward wood the closer they get to the water. For those inclined on swimming, the ocean is right there, waiting for you. In the distance, a few steam ships make their way to places unknown, some people are out in fishing boats, a few brave souls are trying their luck with primitive surfboards, and an older Valraadi sails on by in a rowboat being towed by what certainly looks like an oversize parachute, moving surprisingly quickly. Signs placed at the beach warn people to watch their step, and it’s fairly obvious why when the first couple of crabs wander around in the sand, looking remarkably like the few large, flat rocks on the beach.


Notes: Randomization is active. Breakdowns are active. Time is in Earth Time.



@Madrias

Team Shift Happens

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 07:20:04
Average MPH: 48.4
Randomizer: 11.87 (Calculated)
Refueling Stops: 0
Breakdown: 4 (Towed by RK)
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

Another quiet day on the rails, which was needed after the chaos in the camp last night.


@Caligari

Team Wayfarers

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 12:18:24
Average MPH: 28.8
Randomizer: 7
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 2 (Chassis)
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

Things seemed okay until there was a very loud popping sound and a heavy clunk, followed by something violently lifting the rear of the truck up and slamming it back down again. The bad news: Your driveshaft’s universal joint snapped and you pole-vaulted the truck. The good news: With the transfer case in 4x4 mode, you’re still FWD, and were able to limp Chernobog into camp.


@Executive

Team Gearknobs

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 06:42:17
Average MPH: 52.9
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 0
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

One of the few teams who could really appreciate the winding, twisting roads, it’s decided that this time, the AWD, JDM-spec Hakaru Carica is going to be driven like a rally car. The 4 cylinder engine howls like a banshee as the car is piloted out of the forest, getting air over a couple of small crests that otherwise wouldn’t have bothered anyone, followed by carving the corners on the winding twisty section leading toward Tapari. Somehow, today the car smells very strongly of peaches, likely thanks to yet another air freshener stuffed into the ash-tray.


@BannedbyAndroid

Team Fallen Angels of the Past

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 08:05:53
Average MPH: 43.8
Randomizer: 12
Refueling Stops: 0
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

Gravel seems to be the favored surface for the mysterious time traveling girls, because yet again, they managed to outright floor it on this stage. Other than a couple of times where they lifted instead of keeping the pedal planted, the Claussient was pushed to the limit all the way into the city.


@TheYugo45GV

Team Oil Crisis

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 12:04:04
Average MPH: 29.4
Randomizer: 7
Refueling Stops: 2
Breakdown: 1 (Powertrain)
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

Oops, it’s done it again! There goes another two head gaskets on the troublesome Narrowblock. Another hasty field repair gets them into camp, just… Not quickly.


@Knugcab

Team Hillbilly Rollers

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 06:14:17
Average MPH: 56.0
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

Knowing it’s the last stage that mattered, Andreas puts his foot down. Between Janne’s beer-can bearings and Rukari’s protective runes on the engine block, the IP 4Z engine holds together despite the abuse, and the autobox, despite changing gears like a gremlin bashed them into place with a sledgehammer, keeps the vehicle going in a vaguely forward direction.


@Fayeding_Spray

Team Witchlight

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 11:46:33
Average MPH: 30.1
Randomizer: 8
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 3 (Tires)
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

So, it turns out that one of the tires the EAAC Aphrodite happened to have on it was something called a “retread.” This was discovered after the driver’s front tire disintegrated, tossing what Finne described as being “a black alligator” up past the rear window while causing Elist to fight to control their car. No amount of magic could save this one, so the tiny little space-saver spare was put on instead. This, in turn, sparked a big conversation about why someone would call a tire a “doughnut” when clearly it wasn’t edible, didn’t really resemble a pastry product at all, and (alternatively) wondering what it would be like if tires were actually made out of pastry products instead of rubber.


@MrdjaNikolen

Team Mravolinski-Chitco

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 11:16:00
Average MPH: 31.5
Randomizer: 8
Refueling Stops: 0
Breakdown: 2 (Chassis)
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

Similar to the situation that caused a bunch of chaos to a certain other group of truck-driving-oddballs, the Kontir gets a bit sideways in some loose gravel coming out of the forest and slams the side of the bed into a tree, sending the truck into a spin and flinging the bed contents all over the place again. Luckily, no one was hurt in the crash, and just as luckily, the team has had plenty of practice at picking up cargo and returning it to the truck.


@SurrealCereal

Team Machinas Con Passiones

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 13:39:29
Average MPH: 26.0
Randomizer: 7
Refueling Stops: 4
Breakdown: 1 (Powertrain)
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

It was all going well until the loud and very thirsty V6 gave a resolute and nasty sounding clunk and locked up solid. After waiting for several hours for the engine to cool down “just enough,” Chad dropped the oil pan and removed the “adjustable” connecting rod and piston from cylinder number 5. Now equipped with an awfully-unsteady asymmetric “V5” engine, the Aerodynamic Wedge Shaped Beast rattles into camp, now truly sounding like shit. The first order of business? Welding the bent rod and stuck piston to the hood like a unicorn horn trophy.


@AndiD

Team Quick Rally 47

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 09:52:47
Average MPH: 35.9
Randomizer: 7
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 4 (Team Caused)
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

“No interference, no records.” Arthur and Ford kept that in mind as they started this stage. Somehow, they were going to have to slow down on this stage, too, but without using the oil pressure trick. The AI helpfully pointed out a number of things they could acquire from their surroundings that might prove to be beneficial, and possibly a little time consuming to gather. So, with that newfound plan, they gathered and bagged a cutting of a mercy bush, as it’d been seen in a previous stage to have interesting effects on various populations, took a picture of an old Dyre seen sniffing the air in the forest, collected a cricket that was the size of a chicken’s egg when it jumped onto the windshield, and identified no less than seven different species of non-venomous snakes hanging out in the trees. With their secondary mission now more complete than before, they took a leisurely drive toward their destination.


@BG004130

Team Mrezhari

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 06:34:51
Average MPH: 53.9
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 0
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

You’re not entirely sure what exactly the people in the Mara were doing with a camera out, but as you blew on by, you did manage to pelt the Mara Kanyon with a shower of gravel. The energy drinks had run out a stage ago, so with everyone desperate to get home before the caffeine headaches started to get serious, the Dunav was driven extra hard today.


@NoahC

Team Jockey

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 10:18:59
Average MPH: 34.4
Randomizer: 9
Refueling Stops: 2
Breakdown: 3 (Tires)
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

Things would have gone better if a certain gigantic truck hadn’t wiped out in front of you, covering the road in debris and cargo. Driving through the mess ended up being a mistake, causing a blown steering tire.


@elizipeazie

Team RK Series Racing

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 07:19:51
Average MPH: 48.4
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 0 (Towing Bricksley)
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

With the Bricksley still on the tracks from the previous stage, and still coupled up, it was just a matter of getting everyone into position and taking another long train ride toward the finish. Arriving in the freight yard in Tapari, the two car consist was shuffled over to a decent siding that someone had clearly prepared in anticipation of Robert reaching the “end of the line,” as wooden planks had been set out to make a rather nice unloading ramp. With Robert now free of the rails, and Shift Happens hard at work swapping wheels on the Bricksley back to their road tires, it was just a matter of steaming their way into camp.


@Tzuyu_main

Team Black Rabbit

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 08:35:55
Average MPH: 41.3
Randomizer: 13
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 0
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

Six screaming cylinders, RWD, a gravel road, and a car that feels like a rally machine. Perfect recipe for a perfect storm. The weather report is… Sunny with a high chance of raining gravel and thunder bellowing from the exhaust pipes.


@SheikhMansour

Team Spy Kids

Distance Traveled: 355.2
Time (HH:MM:SS): 09:25:10
Average MPH: 37.7
Randomizer: 8
Refueling Stops: 1
Breakdown: 2 (Chassis)
Total Distance Traveled: 5683.2

It’s never a good feeling when something breaks. Especially when that something turns out to be the exhaust pipe getting a hole in it. After putting up with the ear-shattering roar for a half hour, the decision was made to just slow down enough to not deafen everyone in the SUV.



Stage Finishing Order:

06:14:17 – 5-and-16 Sun – Team Hillbilly Rollers
06:34:51 – 5-and-35 Sun – Team Mrezhari
06:42:17 – 5-and-42 Sun – Team Gearknobs
07:19:51 – 5-and-76 Sun – Team RK Series Racing
07:20:04 – 5-and-76 Sun – Team Shift Happens
08:05:53 – 6-and-37 Sun – Team Fallen Angels of the Past
08:35:55 – 6-and-64 Sun – Team Black Rabbit
09:25:10 – 7-and-28 Sun – Team Spy Kids
09:52:47 – 7-and-53 Sun – Team Quick Rally 47
10:18:59 – 7-and-77 Sun – Team Jockey
11:16:00 – 8-and-48 Sun – Team Mravolinski-Chitco
11:46:33 – 8-and-76 Sun – Team Witchlight
12:04:04 – 9-and-12 Sun – Team Oil Crisis
12:18:24 – 9-and-24 Sun – Team Wayfarers
13:39:29 – 10-and-17 Sun – Team Machinas Con Passiones



Yes, this is the last stage. However, there’s still the Return to Nevada through the Rift (we’ll be a convoy again) and the closing ceremony to come.



Team Shift Happens

Previous Chapters:

Kayden Murders a Clutch - Stage 12 Drive and Camp
Redemption, Realizations, and Repairs - Stage 13 Drive and Camp
Curious Dyre - Stage 13 Camp Final
The Bed is Wrecked - Stage 14 Camp & Drive
Helping a Friend (Collab with Elizipeazie, Stage 14) - Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Stage 15 Details
Breakdowns, Steam, and Late Night Repairs (Collab with Elizipeazie, Stage 15) - Part 1, Part 2
Stage 16 Details
Finishing the Repairs / Riding the Steel Highway (Collab with Elizipeazie, Stage 16 Drive) - Part 1, Part 2
Taking Out The Trash (Collab with Elizipeazie, Stage 16 Camp)


10:40 Moon, Temmingarda Campsite


It was an early start for everyone involved, having to pack up their camp supplies and walk them all the way back to where the vehicles were parked. While the Dione was steaming up, Shift Happens made sure their cargo was secured properly, before adopting the same seating positions as the day before. Kaylie kept her foot pinned to the floor so that Connor’s cut-off override would work, while Valentin took a position up in the front passenger bench of the Bricksley for visibility.


1 Sun, On the Rails

The town’s bell rang loudly, letting everyone know it was officially daytime. The Dione pushed forward, shoving the Bricksley out of the rail yard and down the main line again. Much like the last time, Val and Connor did 90% of the hard work, while Malavera sat behind the Bricksley’s wheel, occasionally using the truck’s brakes to aid in slowing down.

Again, the team was just glad that there were no more hard bumps to deal with. Smooth steel rails meant that within the first hour, Kivenaal had drifted into a state of sleep, his head resting on Jayde’s shoulder as the two vehicles breezed along the rails.

As they reached Tapari, it became obvious that some of the railway personnel had set up a spot for Valentin to convert from rail mode to road mode, with wooden planks laid out over an old siding being their departure point. First, the Dione was uncoupled and brought off of the rails, while the more difficult process of derailing the Bricksley was completed by Kaylie, Jayde, Kayden, and Malavera. With the rail wheels swapped out for their tires, and the cold steel wheels piled into the bed, the Bricksley was hitched up to the back of the Dione and hauled into Tapari.


5-and-76 Sun, Tapari City Center


Relief.

Despite the blown engine, despite 5,700 grueling miles of driving, 17 of the hardest days spent on the move, being here was pure relief for the Shift Happens crew.

By morning tomorrow, everyone would be heading home to Earth, to Nevada, and after the celebrations, to their actual homes.

Tonight, however, was a moment of mild celebration. They’d done it. 17 teams had started. 15 teams made it to the finish line. 14 cars still ran under their own power. One had a hell of a lot of new hardware onboard to make it run.

The beach was calling to them. Waves crashing onto the shore made a siren’s song to those who had been far too beaten by late night repairs, team shenanigans, the troubles of their own past.

Kaylie and Jayde sat out there, not swimming with the others of the team, but watching the chaos as Kivenaal and Malavera, stripped down to swim trunks, tried to dunk one another into the salty water. Rukari had found an old surfboard, a bit of sailcloth, and some tough braided ropes, and had started a bit of a trend with his crude parachute and surfboard antics among the locals. Kayden was just trying to beat the heat by getting soaking wet.

“Watch it!” Kayden yelled shortly after Malavera got the better of Kivenaal, violently dunking the four-armed Valraadi right as Kayden swam by, splashing him in the face.

“Looks like they’re all having fun,” Kaylie said. “I’d say I’m going to miss this place, but…”

Jayde chuckled. “Crugandr is always a bit of a nightmare. I won’t miss that part of it, but I am going to miss the views here.”

“Wait, you’re coming with us?” Kaylie asked.

“It’s another great adventure,” Jayde admitted. “I’ve been here too long. The call to adventure is in my blood, and if I didn’t go with all of you, I’d probably just end up on a ship heading somewhere I haven’t been yet.”

“Like?” Kaylie inquired.

“Well… I’ve never been to Nehmenweld. I’ve heard it’s a very large place, similar to Crugandr in language and some culture, but… Very different at the same time,” Jayde said.

“Maybe someday, we’ll go there,” Kaylie said.

3 Likes

So… since this is the last stage, are we going to get the winner revealed soon? Just asking, no stress. :blush:

The finishing times will need to be calculated, but otherwise they should be in soon

Ok, seems i DO need to join in.
Madrias did calculations, but is not entirely sure about when to release Conclusion part.

This part being convoying out of world back to Nevada
I feel thats where results will be revealed

Speaking of which, you two should check out discussion in Discord and make yourselves heard.

Results are all in the Conclusion. I just need to know whether it’s better to keep to my schedule, or release the conclusion early.

You know, I wonder if this works…

When should I release the conclusion to SR 2022?
  • Release the Results Tomorrow!
  • Release the Results Next Week!

0 voters

Note: I’d honestly rather release this early. There’s a lot of shit going on in my life right now, and I’d honestly rather get the results out to you guys early and not have to worry that I might not be able to get the results out later. But, if you guys want to take the chance that shit might go wrong (we’ve had a run of really, really bad luck here for about the last 6 months, so I’m not counting on there being any good luck left, honestly), I’ll hold off on releasing the results.

Just be aware that, if you ask me to wait, and things go very wrong, you guys could be waiting far longer than just a week for results.

1 Like

Team Mravolinski-Chitco

Last stage
Mentions Team Jockey by @NoahC in first part

Leaving camp and achieving symmetry

This would be hard decision to make: do i wake up rest of team and make them somehow pile up in cab or do i drive as is, with few of them in bed area?
After some thought, decision was made and rest was hastily woken up and hurried into the cab.

With them all in cab, Chicota had assumed his position and started the stage.
As was feared, one part of route meant going through forest again but this time no accidents awaited inside of forest alone, which prompted driver to step on it a little.

However, almost exit was quite crude awakening, bcos some loose gravel combined with high speed meant truck started to drift to the left.

Resulting smack into tree crudely awakened everyone on board which was kinda inevitable seeing that cargo did spread around again.

Doing same stuff again as in twice in two days would not contribute to morale of team, but atleast we were also kinda used to this activity.
This however would not be only thing that had happened with that frequency as, just as it was case yesterday, other team had suffered bcos of cargo spillage.

This time it was Team Jockey instead of pink brick and on place of our spare tire we had some piece of sheetmetal.
No amount of “Stop!” or “Slow down!” could have contributed to them avoiding the certain fate.
But…maybe Jockeys did look forward to some changing of tire, bcos it meant being out of their tiny vehicle.
Regardless, they prob pulled out lesser evil of two, seeing that waiting for us to clean up would hold them back more than said tire…as seen by fact they finished stage before us.

Ofc we couldnt see their finishing position that clearly at that moment, but it was long way to go before us actually getting on move again and them needing to change tire was kinda inevitable by looks of things.

Some of gravel had exited the bed…and found itself being part of this road now, more precisely was added to part of road with loose gravel that contributed to our crash by Chicota.
“Look at me. Im road maintenance now.”
Rest chuckled.
“We will keep rest of it that still remains in bed. Doesnt make much sense to do job of actual road maintenance while in race.”
“What about that bit of gravel you did applied there?”

“Seems it was meant to be there. Also why bother re-adding it to bed when it met its true purpose here?”

There is not awful lot of excitement as we started moving again, noting we havent seen tiny Yinzer on side of road.
“Their tire was completely fucked up by that sheetmetal. We should have seen them in last 1.6 km (1 mile) but yet we dont.”
“So you think they changed it already?”
“Seems like it.”
“Ocean…look there!”

Camping and swimming

People that needed to change into swimwear would find way to do so. Most of team had decided to pile up in water, enjoying little bit of swim and relaxing.
As per usual, Mrdja decided to stay in water just that bit longer.

Our symmetrically dented truck was now prepared to camp…for likely the last time in this world.
This truly interesting bunch had gathered their thoughts.
Mrdja didnt liked the fact car wasnt exactly equipped with air conditioning coupling that with overall high temperatures in this area, but adventure itself was mostly fun.

Car was however in very good condition at the start and just proved to keep so during this long and grueling event. This gave hope it will sufficiently serve Pi in her next adventure, which will prob make this look like short, but useful trial.

Pi herself was also in quite a good condition and we are talking about member who is by far most prone to getting injured.
Apart from the fact that we were overall kinda tired considering events of both yesterday and today, we are fine.

As phones of VerBanka and Mrdja were charging up and everyone drifted to sleep, decision was made on who will be driving to Nevada, as in as part of convoy in which we will return to Earth.

2 Likes

(Nevermind, I managed to change my vote)

TEAM HILLBILLY ROLLERS

Earlier parts

PART 0.1 - A prologue to the prologue

PART 0.2 - Another piece of the prologue puzzle

PART 0.3 - Viva la IP 4Z!

PART 0.4 - Robotman

PART 0.5 - Interference problems

PART 0.6 - Can I play Tetris?

PART 0.7 - Tangerine and familiar

PART 1.0 - Now things got serious!

PART 1.1 - Hello, Thibault and friends!

PART 1.2 - Poor kitty

PART 1.3 - Curse you, Team Oil Crisis!

PART 1.4 - Interlude

PART 2.0 - Bird bird bird, bird is the word!

PART 2.1 - D. Head

PART 2.2 - Good night!

PART 3.0 - Freeway Rockstar

PART 3.1 - DISCO TJO DISCO HEJ

PART 3.2 - Van-Werewolf 1-0

PART 4.0 - Calm after the storm

PART 5.0 - Mirror mirror on the…oh, crap!

PART 5.1 - Hello, little puppies!

PART 6.0 - Speed

PART 6.1 - GIMME OXYGEN! (feat. Madrias)

PART 6.2 - Steamin’ hot! (feat. Elizipeazie)

PART 7.0 - The Kayak

PART 7.1 - Marie the valkyrie?

PART 7.2 - Vegetables

PART 7.3 - Time to tie things up.

PART 8.0 - The hangover

PART 8.1 - The new team member

PART 9.0 - From pink to brown

PART 9.1 - Co-op with Madrias and Elizipeazie

PART 9.2 - Where is Sonic?

PART 10.0 - First at last!

PART 10.1 - Co-op with Variationofvariables

PART 11.0 - Why is this van so damn fast?

PART 11.1 - Co-op with Madrias

PART 11.2 - Demons and dragons bullshit

PART 11.3 - Oops, thank you, Kaylie!

PART 12.0 - Snap, crackle and pop!

PART 12.1 - The fire breathing jalopy

PART 12.2 - Written by Madrias

PART 12.3 - Bumpin’ the bumper

PART 13.0 - A jawdroppin’ ride

PART 13.1 - The monsters under the bed were real, after all!

PART 14.0 - Interlude II

PART 15.0 - Marie died once

PART 16.0 - The horrible sound

PART 17.0 - General Pink

PART 18.0 - WHEEEEEE KA-CHUNK

Somewhat upset over lack of sleep due to the noise team Mravolinski-Chitco made, our friends woke up for the last stint of SR2022. And Andreas was not going to lift his foot off the accelerator this time. This was the last chance to save the position after all the earlier mishaps, and if the van was going to die, at least it was going to die as a hero.

“You are driving pretty fast for having shocks more or less made of cotton and cam bearings made of beer cans”, Janne said.

“I don’t care! This brick has survived all of our abuse this far, why would it die today?”, he answered.

“What are you guys going to do when we get home?”, Marie asked. “I am going to drink beer!”

“Oh, I could never have gue…”, Andreas started to answer when all of a sudden….

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE….KA-CHUNK!

The van was revving like crazy between the gears, that was going in about as smoothly as a square brick in a round hole.

“Great, is the gearbox on its last le…”

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEE….KA-CHUNK!

“PLEASE LITTLE SHITBOX VAN, DON’T GIVE UP NOW, RAAAHHHH!”, Andreas shouted almost in panic.

“There are plenty of those boxes, you know, it was introduced in the Icarus already in the early eighti…”, Janne started to answer.

“YEAH AND THERE IS A GODDAMNED 1982 ICARUS BEHIND EVERY BUSH HERE, OF COURSE, I MUST HAVE FORGOTTEN THAT!”

WHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE……….KA-CHUNKKKKKKK!

“You know what…I don’t care if we have to pull this goddamned thing behind Sonic to reach camp, I will put my foot down and I won’t release it until all the hope is gone!”, Andreas said with a sigh.

WHEEEEEEE….KA-CHUNK…:WROOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR…

“WHY THE HELL DID IT GEAR DOWN NOW ALL OF A SUDDEN?”, he yelled.

RAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHRRRRRRRRRRRRRR…KA-CHUNK….WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

“I can’t stand this”, Andreas said and bashed the dashboard hard with his fist. “Will we fail when being this close?”

“Well, so far nobody has passed us”, Janne said. “Don’t sweat, I doubt that it will be a total meltdown”.

And rolling in first in camp, that seemed to be true. Now, was our team going to gain a place on the podium, or….?

TO BE CONTINUED

2 Likes

Shitbox Rally

Stage 18: Tapari to Nevada

The Finale


Stage Start: 1 Sun, 1/8/3251, Tapari Campsite / City Center

Weather at Stage Start: Hot (34C), mild humidity, a decent breeze.
Weather at mid-stage: Cool (24C), a dark blue sky greets you with swirling light-blue clouds, the air is mildly humid, and there’s a distinct lack of wind.
Weather at Stage End: Warm (30C), dry desert air with light clouds in the sky, a light breeze.

Stage End: 2 PM, March 22, 2022, Shitbox Rally Starting Line, Nevada, the United States.


One last look at the sunrise in Crugandr while breakfast is made leads into the total chaos that is trying to get everyone through Tapari’s carriage shed (now turned into a doorway into the Rift) in an orderly fashion. Once inside, the Rift welcomes everyone back with a reprieve from the searing heat of Crugandr. Like we did on our trip into Crugandr, we travel in a convoy, limited by the pace of the slowest vehicles.

The trip feels longer this time, no thanks to the severely reduced speeds caused by several cars here. However, it doesn’t take too long for the portal back to Nevada to make itself seen, and as we roll on through, one at a time, we return to where it all began. 18 days away from the original camp hasn’t had as much of an effect on things as one might think, considering some people did stay behind to maintain it. As such, the closing ceremony can begin after a late lunch or early dinner.


Notes: The run has concluded, the times for this stage are calculated. This “stage,” like Stage 0, does not count.



@Madrias

Team Shift Happens

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0 (Towed)

Race Time: 119:56:50
Race Avg. Speed: 53.7 MPH


@Caligari

Team Wayfarers

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0

Race Time: 120:19:44
Race Avg. Speed: 51.6 MPH


@Executive

Team Gearknobs

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0

Race Time: 115:53:05
Race Avg. Speed: 54.6 MPH


@BannedbyAndroid

Team Fallen Angels of the Past

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0

Race Time: 129:15:02
Race Avg. Speed: 51.6 MPH


@TheYugo45GV

Team Oil Crisis

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 1

Race Time: 111:24:32
Race Avg. Speed: 58.4 MPH


@Knugcab

Team Hillbilly Rollers

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0

Race Time: 101:50:04
Race Avg. Speed: 61.9 MPH


@Fayeding_Spray

Team Witchlight

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0

Race Time: 127:08:04
Race Avg. Speed: 51.5 MPH


@MrdjaNikolen

Team Mravolinski-Chitco

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0

Race Time: 129:59:19
Race Avg. Speed: 48.7 MPH


@SurrealCereal

Team Machinas Con Passiones

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 2

Race Time: 126:59:42
Race Avg. Speed: 49.2 MPH


@AndiD

Team Quick Rally 47

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0

Race Time: 104:47:57
Race Avg. Speed: 59.0 MPH


@BG004130

Team Mrezhari

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0

Race Time: 106:11:36
Race Avg. Speed: 57.2 MPH


@NoahC

Team Jockey

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 1

Race Time: 131:58:00
Race Avg. Speed: 50.8 MPH


@elizipeazie

Team RK Series Racing

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0

Race Time: 122:36:52
Race Avg. Speed: 55.8 MPH


@Tzuyu_main

Team Black Rabbit

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0

Race Time: 130:21:03
Race Avg. Speed: 48.8 MPH


@SheikhMansour

Team Spy Kids

Distance Traveled: 177.6
Time (HH:MM:SS): 05:55:12
Average MPH: 30
Refueling Stops: 0

Race Time: 102:09:13
Race Avg. Speed: 58.8 MPH



Race Finishing Order:

101:50:04 – Team Hillbilly Rollers
102:09:13 – Team Spy Kids
104:47:57 – Team Quick Rally 47 (The Quantum Xenoanthropology Research Team)
106:11:36 – Team Mrezhari
111:24:32 – Team Oil Crisis
115:53:05 – Team Gearknobs
119:56:50 – Team Shift Happens
120:19:44 – Team Wayfarers
122:36:52 – Team RK Series Racing
126:59:42 – Team Machinas Con Passiones
127:08:04 – Team Witchlight
129:15:02 – Team Fallen Angels of the Past
129:59:19 – Team Mravolinski-Chitco
130:21:03 – Team Black Rabbit Corporation
131:58:00 – Team Jockey
DNF: Team Blazers
DSQ: Team Slow




So, awards from the host, then:

Congratulations to @Knugcab, @SheikhMansour, and @AndiD for being First, Second, and Third respectively in this race. Not just did the three of you have good all-purpose vehicles, you had enough luck on your side to avoid the worst of things.

To the Roleplayers… Thank you! All of you who posted made this challenge fun. I know some hosts would give RP credit, but… No. Not here. You all made this good, and picking a favorite would be impossible. It doesn’t matter whether you did one post or a hundred, if you participated, you made this fun for everyone.

The Ballsy award goes to… Team Black Rabbit Corporation! (@Tzuyu_main) Showing up with a stripped-down, race-prepped road-rally car was… Maybe not the greatest decision. However, through luck, RNG, and perhaps a little bit of good design, you managed to not be last. Also, I love the livery on the Dauer.

Will there be another one of these? Probably. But I seriously need some time away from spreadsheets. This has been fun, but now I’ve learned why so many people run these for 6 to 8 weeks and wrap it up. This was hard work, but because the community kept doing so much for the writing, I was inspired to keep going.


Team Shift Happens will return.

Shitbox Rally 2023… Will probably happen sometime next year.




Team Shift Happens

Previous Chapters:

Kayden Murders a Clutch - Stage 12 Drive and Camp
Redemption, Realizations, and Repairs - Stage 13 Drive and Camp
Curious Dyre - Stage 13 Camp Final
The Bed is Wrecked - Stage 14 Camp & Drive
Helping a Friend (Collab with Elizipeazie, Stage 14) - Part 1, Part 2, Part 3
Stage 15 Details
Breakdowns, Steam, and Late Night Repairs (Collab with Elizipeazie, Stage 15) - Part 1, Part 2
Stage 16 Details
Finishing the Repairs / Riding the Steel Highway (Collab with Elizipeazie, Stage 16 Drive) - Part 1, Part 2
Taking Out The Trash (Collab with Elizipeazie, Stage 16 Camp)
Arrival in Tapari - Stage 17 Drive and Camp


1 Sun, Tapari City Center


Now hitched up behind the Dione, the great lumbering beast that was the Bricksley was hauled forward toward the glowing blue portal. Malavera once again took the wheel, with Kayden and Kivenaal sharing the front bench, leaving Rukari, Jayde, and Kaylie out back. As the bell rang to announce the time, Robert up front pulled hard, dragging the dead truck behind it into the portal as well. Behind them, every other team jockeyed for position to get through, complete with some bumper scuffs, blaring horns, and swearing.


On The Road


This time, the speed was set at 30 miles per hour. Between the Dione towing a vehicle far heavier than itself, the Bricksley with a dead engine, the “V6 - 1” powered dustbuster van of Team Machinas Con Passiones angrily rattling forward while still chugging fuel, and the Towering Pile of Shit sitting on the back of Team Mravolinski-Chitco’s Kontir Cunningham, it just wasn’t seen as advisable to go any faster than that.

The Convoy of Crap cruised carelessly through the Rift, with moments of vehicles, on occasion, traveling up to 5 wide just because they could. Team Oil Crisis again played bumper tag, this time crashing into the back of the Mara Kanyon of Quick Rally 47, then side-swiped Team Witchlight, and finally banged into the side of the Bricksley, prompting Kaylie to yell at them, “You break this tow-bar, I’m going to beat you with it!”

After a long while of cruising, two fuel stops for Team MCP’s thirsty van, a stop in between for pretty much everyone else who needed gas, and a further stop caused by Team Black Rabbit deciding that, if Oil Crisis wanted to trade paint, they’d return the favor and spun the big wagon out with a well-executed PIT maneuver, the portal to Nevada was in sight.

Once again, everyone had to line up, and they rolled out into the bright Nevada sun.


2:00 PM, Nevada, Shitbox Rally Campsite


Jaden looked up as the doors opened, followed by 15 cars in a single-file line at slow-cruise. The first thing he noticed was just how beat up all of the cars were. The second thing he noticed was that the deafening Bricksley was silent. The third thing was the outrageous mess that was Robert, the once normal tangerine brick turned into a primitive high-railer, complete with brass, a giant boiler in the back, and, as he found out, a fucking steam whistle.

“So, what happened out there?” Jaden asked the rest of the Shift Happens crew.

“Dead water pump, blew the head gaskets,” Kaylie said. “Got a tow for the last two stages and a tow home.”

“And the story behind, well, that?” Jaden asked, pointing to the Tangerine Tank Engine.

“Distributor failure, followed by brilliant inspiration and a lot of work. Then they decided rails were better than roads,” Malavera said.

“I see. You know what, I’ll just go get some burgers ready for everyone, and then we can deal with the awards ceremony,” Jaden replied.


3:00 PM

With a large plastic box sitting next to the Bricksley’s open hood attached to the battery terminals, Kaylie cranked up the PA system once again and stood on the dented toolbox to deal with the closing ceremony.

“Well, friends, here we are. Back where we all started from. Almost 5,700 miles later, not counting our little drives there and back again. We’re a couple teams short, obviously. Team Blazers, I hope that you’re able to make peace with what happened out there. Accidents are terrible at the best of times, and while we all knew the risks of rally racing, well, no one expects to die out there. Wishing you the best of luck in your future endeavors. To Team Slow, who drove drunk in one stage, this is exactly why we don’t let that happen. A team, perfectly sober, wrecked out. This is why you were disqualified back then and sent home.”

Kaylie grabbed the roof rack for a bit of support, then said, “So, there are 15 of us left. Rukari has collected the rings and calculated the driving times,” she stopped to accept a sheet of weathered parchment from Rukari at that moment, and could be heard muttering, “Twin Suns, your handwriting is hard to read, Rukari,” before she continued with, “so we’ll soon be able to tell you who finished first. At least, as soon as I find someone who can read this shit.”

Kivenaal grabbed both the sheet of parchment and the microphone, then read out, “At 4 days, 5 hours, 50 minutes and 4 seconds, first place is… Team Hillbilly Rollers!” He waited for the shouting and cheers and congratulations to die down, then continued, “In second place, at 4 days, 6 hours, 9 minutes, and 13 seconds, it’s… Team Spy Kids!” Like before, he waited until things quieted down some, then announced, “Living up to their namesake, at 4 days, 8 hours, 47 minutes, and 57 seconds, give a round of applause for third place, it’s Quick Rally 47!” He noticed above the cheers and applause that the two men in QR-47 were looking a bit nervous, and he sent Kayden over to chat.

Kayden was surprised to learn, as he got closer, that they weren’t supposed to be setting records. In that moment he quipped, “Who was the second man on the Moon? No one really remembers second place, let alone third. Yes, you made the podium… In an unofficial race with us holding the only time sheet. Relax.”

Jayde, likewise, stood behind them and said quietly after Kayden wandered away, “You can still do your observations. You’ll get more useful data anyway, being in the top three.” He grinned as they stared at him like deer facing a Dyre, then said, “You think I haven’t noticed the note-taking? I practice magic, it’s my job to be observant. Let’s be honest here, I don’t think anyone here really cares what you were doing, because you were racing with us.” As he walked away, he looked over at Kivenaal, who gave him a thumbs up before waving to QR-47.

Kaylie, on the other hand, approached Janne, Andreas, and Marie, then pulled out $2,000 from her wallet. “There was no real official prize, but we figured, if the budget for the car was two-grand, paying that back to the winners would be a good idea,” Kaylie admitted.

Kivenaal then announced, “So, some awards before we let all of you make and enjoy the party. Of course, all you win are some bragging rights, so there’s no actual value in these, but they are fun. First, the Ballsy award. This goes to whoever we think brought the least suitable car for the job. There was an argument between Team Jockey and Team Black Rabbit, but we’re giving it to the women in the Dauer! You brought one awesome looking car. Sadly, I’d guess it’s probably tuned for street and gravel rally, not off-road driving, and so you got a little bit beaten up out there.”

“Heroic Fix is a no brainer, just by the name. It goes to the team who yanked victory from the jaws of defeat by extraordinary means with one hell of a repair. Team RK Series Racing, you also get some bragging rights for making a steam engine out of your Dione. You’ll also get another award later for helping us out,” Kivenaal said, looking over at Val with a smile. “And don’t worry, I don’t think there’s any fame coming your way for either of these.”

“So, now we come to the Trashed award. This goes to whoever managed to wreck their vehicle the most and yet still finish. This one’s hard, because Mravolinski-Chitco, Machinas Con Passiones, Oil Crisis, Hillbilly Rollers, and, well, Shift Happens are all on the list. We’re out by default because, well, technically, we’re not a complete wreck, our engine still technically runs and we’re still recognizable. We just can’t drive it all that far because, well, we’ve got engine troubles. Likewise, while Oil Crisis has traded paint with just about everyone here and has the only car in the field with bullet holes in it – Put the shotgun down, Tanuki – their Magistrate wagon is still recognizable, even if it did kill two pairs of head gaskets on the run. This leaves the three vehicles in worst condition. Machinas Con Passiones, who has the worst fuel efficiency imaginable, and has a piston welded to their hood after removing it from the engine. Mravolinski-Chitco, who toppled a tower of trash in the form of their camper unit and then bashed the bed with a tree. Or Hillbilly Rollers, who smashed up the front of their van, had their sliding door get hit by a station wagon, has an interior that smells like 3 day old beer, and more scratches than paint left on one side.” Kivenaal paused for dramatic effect, then said, “Because we couldn’t decide, all three of them get bragging rights. Hillbilly Rollers, Machinas Con Passiones, and Mravolinski-Chitco are the winners of our Trashed award!”

“And last, certainly far from least, it’s the “We’re not Top Gear” award. This goes to the team who didn’t leave someone behind even when they had the chance. RK Series Racing, this one’s for you. You had every opportunity to leave us there on the side of the road, our engine making more steam than your boiler. You towed us not only into the camp, but all the way to the steamworks, despite your car being almost as badly broken. We worked together to fix your car, and you rewarded us with rail wheels and a tow to the finish. Even though getting us on the rails was a royal pain, even though towing us slowed you down, and even though you had every opportunity to say to us that we were on our own, you chose instead to make sure we got to the next stage. For this, I speak on behalf of all of us when I say this. Thank you,” Kivenaal said.

Kaylie grabbed the microphone, then said, “So, let’s get this party started, shall we? We’ve got until 8 PM before we really have to get this all packed back up. Might as well have some fun now that the racing is done.”

5 Likes

That’s a real surprise, when I entered with my humble van I had no idea that I had entered a winner, although after some very fast runs I started to get the feeling that I would finish quite high. The Freeway star seems to bring me luck, though. Not only was it the vehicle that took me to my by then best result in an Automation challenge earlier this year (2nd in CW3), now it also have helped me to win my first challenge ever on this board after almost 5 years which feels fun.

I want to thank all the participants for making this a fun game and now when this is done, I think that I will pull off 24h challenge 2023 in a not too distant future, so if looking for some fast paced metal carnage, see you there.

2 Likes

Hell yeah, brothers, let’s close this one out


Nevada, United States

Local time: Early/Mid Afternoon.

Strong Wind and Calm Seas

This chapter has been written in cooperation with @Madrias


The battered Union lumbered though the portal, still running rough, still slightly smoking and smelling like unburned gasoline. But, the car had made it home alive, and the Magistrates on board with it. The whole team had undergone a grueling 17 day journey, and yet, no one seemed tired. The last night in Crugandr had proved to be the most peaceful they’ve had since starting and just like that, they were back in Nevada, in the desert in the middle of nowhere.

Tanuki, the Japanese terrorist, had attempted to start shit when the results were announced, but staring down the barrel of the rifle that fired a bullet more potent than a 4570 discouraged her. But, as the final festivities were beginning, Team Oil Crisis, was packing up to leave, and Orlen remembered something.

“Hey, Mal? Could you open up a portal to the hideout?”

The orange lombax turned to face him. “Why?”

“Do you remember the 4 Smith and Wesson revolvers I bought?”

“The ones you bought for yourself but never used?”

Orlen nodded. “Yeah.”

Malcolm raised an eyebrow, but then recomposed himself. “What are you planning to do with them?”

“Give them to someone I deeply respect.”

“Alright, don’t take too long.”

Within minutes, Malcolm had set up the Dimensionator Mark 2 and set it to non interdimensional travel, before he pressed the fire button. The machine fired with a loud energy pulse, and everyone around the camp noticed something off.

Kivenaal had folded the tailgate down and cleared a space of truck bed to sit in, enjoying one of the burgers that Kaylie and Kayden’s brother had cooked up. The announcements were done, the teams were all back home, they were all safe. Well, safe enough.

He’d gotten three bites in, leaving only about a bite left of the heavy triple burger he was eating, when a feeling ripped across his skin, like someone had simultaneously brushed his fur the wrong way and then stuffed his fingers into a light socket. He shoved the last bite of burger in his mouth, glancing around to see where everyone was, the air above his upper right hand beginning to heat-ripple as he prepared, though didn’t yet bring into existance, a fireball. He spotted the dimensional rift and shook his head, the superheated air above his right hand cooling as he realized there wasn’t much of a threat.

He looked over to see the others looking mildly annoyed, looking vaguely around for the source of the disturbance, with Jayde looking the most as if he might decide to do something about it.

“Hey! What are you doing over there?” Jayde yelled. “That is making my stump itch, so cut it out before I have to close it for you!”

The purple rift pulsed brightly, before Orlen stepped out clutching a wooden box. Then as quickly as it had come the portal closed. Then, Malcolm packed up the Dimensionator and put it in the back of the Magistrate.

Meanwhile, Orlen had spotted Kivenaal, and was now walking towards him, holding an elegant, modern wood box, that seemed to contain some sort of gift.

Jayde glared vaguely in the direction of Malcolm as he packed up the Dimensionator, shaking his head before saying, “If you left something behind in Crugandr, I could have opened a path for you.”

Kivenaal, on the other hand, looked over at Orlen as he approached with a large, darkly-stained, polished wooden box in his hands. He looked at his greasy fingertips, courtesy of that burger, and curled his fingers inward to use a bit of fire to clean them without making it obvious to the whole camp. He then glanced around and checked where Malavera was, checked the wind direction, and pulled the last of his cigars out of his pocket. With a claw still edged in fire, Kivenaal lit the cigar and the flames vanished a moment later as he took a light puff of smoke and blew it off to the side.

Orlen seemed more relaxed than ever as he approached Kivenaal, and he hoped the Valraadi wouldn’t be suspicious of the box, but he didn’t let the thought get to him.

“Hello.”

“Hello to you as well,” Kivenaal said, his upper left hand collecting the cigar so he wouldn’t drop it. “Did you have fun playing bumper cars in the Rift?” he asked with a grin. “I mean, I can’t blame you, it’s a long drive. And it’s not like you didn’t do it before.”

“Eh, it’s mostly the fact I’m a terrible driver. First time was a sonic boom, this last time I didn’t check the blind spots. But I’ll admit it was fun. Anyway, considering all we’ve been through, I decided to bring you something as a token of gratitude.”

“Not entirely sure I understand, Orlen. I haven’t done anything particularly noteworthy out there,” Kivenaal said, glancing at the box and trying to figure out what could be inside it.

“Well, I think you did. Remember that night in Duskwater village, our conversation? That was the moment I discovered something. Initially, I was suspicious of you, thought you were dangerous, a threat. I always had this problem, I always nearly killed someone when they made a sudden move, and one day it escalated and someone was killed. It’s been nearly 8 years since then, and it’s been haunting me ever since. But, during that conversation that night, I realized that my past demons would make life worse for me, and you being there for me is what helped.”

Kivenaal gave a light chuckle. “Like my brother over there, I can be dangerous,” Kivenaal said, “but I do try my hardest to stay on the side of the light. But, on that day, I saw in you something that I saw in myself, too. Someone who had spent a large part of their life hiding from their past.”

He looked at his own right hands, taking a long draw on the cigar before saying, “I’ve been haunted by a debt I can’t repay. I owe my life to someone who made sure I got on the last ship leaving the planet, and… He died when my world ended. I owe a life-debt, Orlen, that I can’t ever pay back. This race, however, taught me that instead of living a life full of regret for that which I can’t change, I should at least attempt to enjoy it in some way. Instead of drowning my sorrows and hiding from the past, I learned to face it head on. And while I still occasionally saw the purple fog of death in my nightmares, I saw the beauty in the world outside of those moments.”

Kivenaal took another draw of the cigar, frowning as he realized it was nearly gone, then stubbed out the last inch of it on the tailgate. “Rukari can be mad later that I’ve blistered the paint,” he muttered, wiping the still-hot ashes off of the metal.

“But, in Duskwater Village, what I said there is true. It’s something you know about yourself now, something to work on. Given that your brother is raising two Dyre pups, you’ll get plenty of practice, if what Jayde says is true. They’re intelligent, mischievous, and strong,” He explained.

Orlen sighed and looked back towards the direction of the Magistrate, where Kameron and Aidan were tinkering with something under the hood. “Well, who knows what might happen, only thing I can do is wait.”

Then he walked over to the tail gate and set the box down. “Ah yes, the gift. I thought, seeing as you had to empty out those .357 magnum revolvers when that Dyre came at you, I think you’d do well with something with a little more stopping power.”

As Orlen lifted the lid of the box, Kivenaal was overcome by surprise.

He stared at the four matching handguns, the gleaming nickel-chrome finish on the 8-inch barrels catching the Nevada sun. “Smith & Wesson .500 Magnum revolvers, the 8 inch ported barrel for recoil compensation, 5 round cylinders, the most powerful full-production revolvers easily available. I’ve wanted to get one, but could never really justify it to myself. And these look like a perfectly matched set. Four of them,” Kivenaal said, still a bit surprised by the gift.

“I bought them a few years ago and they’ve been collecting dust ever since. It took me a second to find them. Never been used, and I didn’t ever touch them, only bought them because I wanted 4 handguns to make the number on the rack even.” Orlen explained.

“From what I’ve heard, the recoil on these is substantial, so I’m not really surprised they haven’t been used,” Kivenaal began. “If you were more comfortable with something like .44 Magnum, then it’s reasonable that you would have looked at these and thought they weren’t ready for a mission,” he added. He picked one of the four pistols up, his fingers curling around the grip with the smallest finger ending up underneath it, his index finger’s claw resting gently against the trigger guard as a natural safety. He pointed it in a safe direction and looked down the sights, then flipped the cylinder open and closed it carefully afterward after making sure the weapon was unloaded. “I’ll have to get new grips made for these, but that isn’t a problem for me,” He said, carefully placing the large revolver back into the box. “Unfortunately, my holsters are full right now, and I don’t exactly think those will fit without some serious effort, which would ruin the holsters I had made for my Peacemakers,” Kivenaal admitted.

Orlen placed his hands on his hips, and then sighed. “Well, You can take the box with you, they came with it anyway. Plus it’ll give you something to remember me by.” he said before glancing back at the Magistrate which had it’s hood now closed, but instead had the Dimensionator now on it’s roof with wires leading down into the car and engine bay. His team was milling about packing up the rest of their belongings and getting ready to leave.

“Ah,” Kivenaal said with a smile. “I see. You’re heading home, or at least heading somewhere else,” he added. Kivenaal held out his upper right hand for a handshake, then said, “May you have good luck in your future endeavors. As my people would say, Vuri ada ahd nevuri marin, viathien nevikhal. Strong wind and calm seas, my brother not-of-my-blood.” Kivenaal pulled Orlen into a strong hug, thumped him once on the back, then let him go.

Orlen straightened his posture and stood at his full height. “As my people say, may the stars above guide your way, may our paths cross again. Farewell, to you and your friends.”

He sighed and then turned to leave.

Kivenaal gave a polite nod and a wave, watching as Orlen headed back over to the Magistrate. In that brief moment, he saw a glimpse into a potential future and lightly shook his head, trying not to laugh. He’d seen Orlen and Aedan dealing with two slightly-older Dyre who had discovered the joy of a can of paint and 5 minutes of both Aedan and Orlen being distracted by something else. Sure enough, when both of them turned around to see the couch, walls, chair, and rug covered in green paint, well, that was all Kivenaal had seen, but the look on everyone’s faces had been priceless.

As Orlen walked back to the, he felt water coming into his eyes, blurring his vision. But before anything else happened he wiped it away with a gloved hand. Eventually, he got back to the Magistrate, and got in. Kivenaal watched as its engine started, lightly startling Tanuki and Mel who were nearby, then it reversed gently out from it’s parking space, this time not hitting Marie, coming to a stop short of where she was walking past, before the reverse lights shut off and it pulled out into the road, going south.

The Magistrate had seemingly left, until it came roaring down the road northbound. There was a hum increasing in pitch followed by a weird noise akin to that of electricity arcing, before a purple hole opened in the fabric of reality producing a half muffled thunderclap, which gathered the attention of the whole camp, and caused everyone to feel a weird lightheadedness and tingling in their bones. The remaining teams saw the Magistrate fly down the dirt road, before it disappeared into the portal it had opened, which closed almost immediately after the wagon disappeared through it, producing a much louder thunder-like sound which at the same time sounded like a grenade going off.

All that was left after that, was the sizzling, popping and crackling of the air where reality had been torn open and the dust cloud caused by the Magistrate when it came down the road. The only evidence that it was ever there.


The Magistrate Will Return


Well folks, that’s the end of my story arc for Shitbox Rally 2022. It’s been great fun, seeing all the antics we’ve been up to and collabs we’ve had together, and I hope to see you all in 2023.

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This challenge was fun to participate in imo. Thanks for this glorious challenge

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